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About Bandon recorder. (Bandon, Or.) 188?-1910 | View Entire Issue (Sept. 21, 1905)
4 By Special i Delivery By GEORGE ETHELBERT WALSH Con rlKht, 1904, by George Ethelbcrt Walsh fWniZ KEV. SEXTUS WORTER- LY gatheretl the loose sermon M leaves in hLs hands and shoved them aside, not hastily or Im patiently, but reluctantly, as though yielding to a temptation. The day was aot suited to sermon composition. lhe Kev. best us Worterly sighed heavily, sighed with the unconstrained freedom of a man who knows that he Is alone. There had been a time when the Rev erend Sex t us (uo one had called him this for short except a defunct maiden aunt, who dared not approach nearer to familiarity than the compound name) was happy In his loneliness. "A man can do his best work when un- trammeled by the responsibilities of family ties," he reasoned in those days. Ihoe pessimistic days had faded somewhat. The maiden aunt who had ministered to Ids few material wants m uis nousenoiii was only a memory now. A longing to hear lips abbreviate ui name even to uie extent of two words mm possessed him latelv. It was a species of madness that he did not acknowledge to himself. None ever suspected sucli weakness in the man of stiff broadcloth and high, starched collar who so graciously and successfully filled the Dalevllle pulpit every Sunday. Least of all. probably, did the gentle, demure soul of Widow Trimble, who ln her own intense loneliness pitied the pasior ouiy as sympatiietlc creatures can. sue uau nurtured and guided two husbands through the winding path way of married life, tearfully laying them, with the help of the Reverend fcextus In his capacity as oiiiciating clergyman, beneath the sod when all earthly powers had failed to renew tneir lease of lite. She was alone again, alone In her double bereave mom. but seeking to give rather than requiring comfort. Cynthia Trimble was a name to con jure wan. it iiai a sweet, muk rous sound in verse and a subtle suggestion that the amorous mind could readily traee to all sources of beauty and love liness. The Reverend Sextus had broken his fealty to a single, bachelor existence by falling in love with Cynthia. But he was not versed in the ways of the lover, and he shrank from the possibility of the reeipient of his affections ever discovering his amorous inclinations. Had tile Reverend Sextus died yes terday there would have been no scrap of paper found in his possession P"lay to indicate the slumbering of a great passion in his life, none that is. there had been none - which could betray a lovesick soul, but within his inner pocket there was this day an epistle men nad caused Tdm to Mgh and turn reluctantly from his sermonizing It was a proposal to Cynthia, whieh he had indited after mm-h painful thought and elaboration. If ever the time should come when he could find the courage to speak he would rejveat the contents of this letter. Its diction was fault less, its confession earnest, but not too affectionate, its wording to the point ami not uo verbose. It was a masterpiece of its kind. But it was never intended to be de Hveriil. The Reverend Sextus had not HE I'LACEl IT WITHIN HIS IKNIiK l'OCKLT. composed it for that reason. No eyes othor than hi own should ever rend it. The proposal to Cynthia was the Rev. Sextus Worterly's masterpiece. It re Uected his highest mental and spiritual expression. Today he read It over and over and reluctantly thought of" the ne cesslty of destroying it lest something Khould happen to reveal its secret. But a moment later he nlaced Ir with In his Inner pocket. "I shall stroll nwhlle, and I may need it," lie said as excuse for his sudden change of mind. Despite his threescore and five years, the Reverend Sextus was a man of strength and agility, a youth in all ex cept years. He strode from his study and swung down the llower scent in lane with the easy grace and muscular pow er of a much younger man. He loved to wander afield seeking new sights in distant pastures and communing with nature in all her many perplexing moods. Today he rather strained a point. When he rested in a deep" wood he was many miles from home, with the noon aour approaching. It was delightfully ?ool and retiring in the wo:ds. There was no house within three miles of his :lell. On all sides were the shadows of l great wood. 'reat was his surprise to hear voices anon stilling the sounds of the woods and hushing the warbling of his feath ered friends. The Reverend Sextus turn rd to greet the newcomers, wondering not a little at their strange appearance. Shaggy of beard, unkempt and unclean af body and clothes, thej- appeared out of all harmony with the scene. Hl"-1 1 "11: a i .u. .-snaggx. wo nave sometuin I k,.r." ....1 . .1 :.i u .-jf.,ivi- win- vi (iii-iii, mi .i (uiuij; i 111 his accent "U'hnt il'vo ."ill Itv m - - - - . ........ . 1 J .1 . , . . . . . ooineuiiu oroKi: loose ironi the picter. SI III! :gy pushed his companion In the Daekground. replying: "Ye don't under stand yer bisness. Pete. It's me ole Men what gave me a lift when I wuz a youngster, lie's a minister. Ain't "ou : The Kev. Sextus Worterly rose witii dignilied slowness from his seat on a facing, broad sailor collar and nttrav log and made reply as befitted his posi- tlvu sUh,vo nro strjk,nir fentllr0s,. white tion In life "You surprise me at your rudeness It pains me exceedingly to see you in your present plight" "Jest what 1 was tellln' me pard," fehaggy made sharp reply, advancing. us puiuiui 10 ne nroke, air were sick of it. We've cum to ask ye to help us." "I should be only too glad under or dinary circumstances to lend assist ance to you, but the suspicious appear ances of things compel me to" Ye shouldn't suspect honest men jest because they liappen to be down on their luck. Now, see here. If you wuz The man seated himself on the log which the aged miulster had Just va cated. but Pete suddenly pushed for ward and growled I ain't got uo time fer yer tomfool ery. Shaggy. Ye can sit here an talk with the old gent all day. but I'm off after I get what he's holdin' in his pockets. Come, old man, shell out!" rote had thrust a hand into the pocket of the affrighted and dum founded minister, and while he was rllllncr it the TIovoren.1 sptIi fnit.mi CT - - - ....... ,.u f,. aloud: "Do I understand that this is high way robbery that I'm ii victim of foot pads, of common thieves?" Unresistingly up to this time the vic tim of the holdup had permitted them to extract from his pockets all that they contained, but at the sight of the letter addressed to Cynthia his whole manner underwent a marked change. He clutched the hand that profanely held the love epistle. "Not that!" he said. "All else, but not that!" "An why not?" demanded Pete. "It nui'St be valuable if ve set so much store by it." lie thing the detaining hand from him ami held the letter above his head. The Reverend Sextus lost his balance and rolled in the dust ami leaves. When he recovered himself the two men were moving away, counting tleir e;is- cash and and yes. reading his tie to Cynthia. TO KEV'ONTINUKl). J WE SHOULD READ POETRY. Tin Xeed to Keen AIIe Knlth In Spiritual I. if cm In re. ua lysis is encouraged by our civili zation more than the sense of beaut v It is a scientific age. and we are ail in danger to some extent of that atrophy of the imagination of which Darwin is the most famous case, poetry is In literature that branch which appeals primarily to the imagination and helps to keep it alive, as eercis,. hcl- to preserve the body. As we do not pro duce much poetry or other imaginative art we are thrown back upon the past. uid this increases the necessity of edu cation in poetry, for forms of expres sion which are not contemporary are c.'Iilom entire! v ;i!rirti-';i f i I wltrinnt ' .-I!-.- ....v.. ......-.'..i training. Often people of the best nat ural tasle are less open to certain beau tics than others less naturally appre ciate, but with more mental and aes thetic exercise in youth. The most sincere minds reject mot emphatical ly any pretence of caring for what they really do not enjoy. Thus among the truest natures of our. acquaintance one sees nothing in early painting, another in iM.etry and a third In the higher mu sic, all from lack rather of training than of eye, ear or fancy. In the cir cumstanoes of our day it Is more im portant in a child's education that he should be prepared to like and under stand Spenser and Wordsworth, Mil ton. Burns and Shelley than that he should early acquire a realistic mode of thinking or a start In scientific in formation. Exact knowledge and logic in this age will take care of them selves, but it requires more care to keep alive that S sublime , Of something far more uoply Interfused. Whose dwellhu; Is the llM of setting si:r.s. And th round ocean and the living air And the blue sky ami In the mint! of man. Whatever truth may be. it is larger than the little naturalistic thoughts and observations that sometimes claim the title. There is more of it In a Beethoven symphony than In one of Herbert's Spencer's essays, and more in Macbeth's soliloquies than In four teen weeks in natural science. Col lier's Weekly. ICnox tind Scotland. Scotland owes to Knox not its exist ing Presbyterian government this was the subsequent work of Andrew Mel ville but that which Is the chief fea ture and main fitrength of Prcsbyterl anlsm viz, tho full recognition (lack ing In Episcopacy) of the Christian laltj' In tho administration of the church, combined with that orderly subornation (which Congregationalism falls to secure) of tho whole church to one representative and supreme au thority. It la owing to Knox and his fellow reformers that tho Scottish church avoids the danger both of hier archy and of anarchy. "John Knox," by Professor Henry Cowan. French Art. There must be more vitality In French art as a whole than you would guess from a visit to the salons. Nay, there Is. I do not say that It is healthy anywhere. The great days are gone, but still, out of doors In posters, in Illustrations for the Journals, In bijou terie, in the ornamentation of shops, even in the pictures In railway ter minithere are still signs that the plastic arts have a vitality in France, more vitality than with us. It is often vulgar enough, but at least it Is bold. -London Outlook Heap Your Kcivnril In Ponce. You have a disagreeable duty to do at 12 o'clock. Do not blacken i) and 10 and 11 and all between with the color of 12. Do the work of each and reap ' your reward m peace, so when the dreaded moment lu the future becomes the present 3'ou shall meet it walking in the light, and that light will over- come its darkness.- George McDonald, WOMAN AND FASHION HnndMOiue IIIoiimc. How many times during a season oc casions crop tie when a wardrobe seems absolutely inadequate and each separate frock tails to till our demands, A natty extra waist will often save the day. and the accompanying illustration shows a stvlish model. A doen voice linen, trimmed with narrow red sou- wiibi- wiru SAiLon collak. tache braid am. finished with a dash Ing lie of red -ilk, will make a stuu- liiug blouse af er this pattern. Blue linen with dec irat ions In white or tan with bror.it ro also good combina tions. Fremit tlannel or any of the light woolen i taterials may be used for ibis waist. Sill."' Paxil lonulilc. Silk has u i gone out of fashion be cause ot lb- advent ot hot weather. Taffetas ant fancy silks, not to speak f foulards mil other utility silks, are immensely ; pular. Clowns for elabo rate oceasi. is are made of the charm ing pomp.x'otir sillcs, which are so hi;ni;ifi!i that they never May out of fashion v. r long. Xovcltle.s In Stven ter. A sweater bolero is something new. colhirlos. -tiding just above the waist line and nv: fastening down the front. It is made with loose bell shaped el bow sleeves. Another novelty Is the ordinary blouse form, ending at the waist, which has a square neck, stand ing collar and cuffs knitted of con trasting color. I':icliiiiK Drexs Skirt. No crease is permissible In the front panels of dress skirts- or petticoat: Uh.-r, for that matter, in packing kirti neer fold through the middle of the front breadth. Professional pack ers leave ine ironi oi tne skirt un Teased except for .a necessary cross wise fold and fold th" skirt around it. n tins portion goes without creases or wrinkles they declare the rest I- pretty sure to come urn all right. Soft paper ami plenty of it Is a neeessitv tor gowns. All folds excepting tlio-e actu ally pressed in with the intention should be separated by layers of paper Outdoor Xcffliccc. In this age of the practical, when the dressing .-cks or negligees are no longer limited to the confines of one's boudoir or bedroom, dainty designs for these graceful necessities are plan ueu who as great can ami tiiougl.- as any other girnient in a woman's ml- robo. There has always been a certain charm ab;.:it these fascinating little negligees which appeals to both men and women, for they carry with them an air of comfort which is distinctly agreeable and satisfying. As they often have to be slipped on htnriedly IiKl SSINO SACK. those that are simple In construction are often the most desirable. The model here shown is all that could be desired. Made in one piece, it requires only a few minutes' time to fashion a dainty garment. The trimming may be of bands or of contrasting material. It requires only one and one-ninth yards of forty inch material, so that almost every woman would bo able to have a few dressing sacks from pieces left over from other garments. Made of silk or lightweight cloth it becomes a wrap that may be worn on the street and is qu'te enough protection from cold for so'ie time to come. Knee Screen For I.eperN. In the leper colony of Audljan, Tur kestan, there are a number of women who have become professional beggars. The sad creatures on whom the fright ful disease has made visible marks use large fans made of leaves to shield their faces when they present their palms for coppers The oddly shaped screens are Large enough to entirely conceal the head, and if the hands, too. have begun to show signs of the dls- ease pieces of linen are sometimes wound over them. MAS. mm V, 1 tY.CTS IN FEW LINES 'I he latest Loudon quotation of ra liuKi was $:JO.U0J. There ate 7-: 7 varieties of we'd in the Philippine i.nvsts. More thai; o.ihiO persons aim ai.y ;! appear in the 1'nited States au.i .t: never heard from again. Alkmar, Netherlands. Is to have ; steam tramway, to be built by the "Noorder Stoointrninwagmnatsehap pij." There are four towns In the Philip pines witJi a population exceeding 10, 000 each and thirty-live with a popula tion exceeding 5.000. Six miles Is the length of a petition promoted by the British National Ca nine Defense league in support of the bill for the prohibition of the vivisec tion of dogs. It has been found in Victoria. N. S. W., that unscrupulous tanners there have been Increasing the weight of their leather by the use of barium chlo- Vide, a poisonous chemical. For thirty-seven vacant posts of a minor character In the Victoria (N. S. W.) civil service no fewer than 01U candidates recently presented them- selves. The highest salary was 500 a year. The town council of Neuchatel has unanimously adopted n scheme .by which water for drinking, taken from Lake Neuchatel at a depth of 2(50 feci. is to be conveyed to Paris, a distance of 250 miles. A i -row hunt was recently held by hiriy-nine hunters of Elgin and Kane utilities. III., lasting two days. Their record was 1,131 crows, besides f0 butcher birds and 5 hawks. The score of sides was 071 to 5G0. in the mountains of Tyrol It Is the custom of women and children to come out when it is the close of day and sing. Their husbands, fathers and brothers answer them from the hills on their way homeward. It is sahl that the people of Tangier received King Edward so enthusiastic ally because It was raining on the day of his arrival. The country had been suffering from want of rain, and the Moroccans thought he had brought it. J. W. Thompson of Adams has a number of pictures of a wood chuck which has climbed a tree. This is a very unusual thing for that animal to do and Is never attempted except In the most dire necessity. This particu lar "chuck" did it to escape from a dog. In addressing hihlanders who placed wreaths on the memorial cairn at Cul loden on the occasion of the anniver sary of the battle recently T. Napier said "the Ilauoverians" had now ruled for 200 years, and he thought they should "make a graceful bow and re tire." What is said to be the smallest elei trie light installation In the world Is b be found in the village of Bremen, near Dormbach. Thuringia. It comprises a single arc lamp installed in a church, the lamp being operated by a small d- namo driven by the wheel of the 11 lage mill. A large bald eagle dropped from Its talons a live lamb In the dooryard of Pearl Martin of Harmony, Me., one day recently. Tho lamb had a few cltiw scratches, but otherwise was alive and smart. It appeared to be about three or four days old. and Mr. Martin is raising It as a cosset. At the annual meeting of the parish- loners of I'arnworth-wlth-Kearsley parish church, near Bolton, England, It was mentioned that the sexton of the church. Ceorge Holmes, had celebrated his jubilee. He had commenced his du ties when sixteen years of age and has officiated at nearly 10,000 funerals. At Pompeii, Naples, San Martino and other Italian cities tourists could ob tain formerly with wise permits to snapshot historic places for a nominal fee. but now the objects intended to be photographed have to be specified in writing, and a tax. varying from 10 cents to .1, Is imposed for every nega tive. Because bur husband did not wear a dress suit at a dinner at which she had guests Mrs. Ulysses Craig, wife of a financier of Indianapolis, Iud., sued for divorce. Judge Leathers granted her a divorce and nwarded her -17,000 alimony, a house worth $33,000, cus tody of her four children. 200 a year to clothe the children and 50 n mouth to support the children. There ar seventeen mills In Ger many engaged exclusively in the man ufacture of tissue paper. Germany turns out more tissue paper than any other country in the world. The ex ports of German tissue paper, especial- ly those qualities used for cigarettes, copying books, artificial flowers, chlm- ney shades, carnival articles, etc., are steadily increasing. One of the most unlquo canes In ex istence is the property of Mr. D. V Beans, paymaster of the Burlington railway. This cane represents 100. 000.000 In money, 2,250,000 pay chocks and 5S0.000 miles of travel. The cam- was made by Mr. Beans himself from part of the pay checks paid out in hi: flftecn years of experience as paymas ter. The viceroy of the Twokuang prov luces, Chlua, recently put out u proc lamation that no pawnshop was to take arms In pawn. Being later him self in need of funds, he sent his own agents with arms to pledge. Five shops nccepted them, 'and these he aft erward fined in the amount of 7,25) on eh In sawing a huge rock maple which was cut on the farm of C. F. Webber at West Kennebiiuk, Me., a piece of granite was found Imbedded In the wood. The piece weighed several pounds and Is thought to have been imbedded In the wood of the tree by a blast many years ago when the rail road was being constructed. Charity Herein n at Home. The absentinlnded Professor Lump lln is always so shabbily dressed and presents altogether such a broken down appearance that the other day on seeing his own Image reflected in a large mirror he drew out his parse to give himself an alms. Lustlge Blatter. He Induces It. Gerald The faddists claim that yawning Is a most healthful and beau tifying exercise. Gladys Well, If that opinion gains ground Cholly Sapphead will become much more popular with the girls. Louisville Courier-Journal. I HUMOR OF THE HOUR An Unfortunate Selection. "You say the prisoner was singing. Uid you notice the song? "Yes, your honor. lie repeated it so many times that it Impressed itself upon my memory. It was something auout a dafrydil.' "A new song?" "I had never heard It before, your Honor. It was a sentimental song. someuung m the popular line. No doubt your honor knows the sort." "Perhaps I do. Can you sing it, offi cer." ' "I can make the attempt, your honor. lhe air is simple, but the words are a tntle hard. Do you want me to slug it. sir?" "Yes. Silence in the court" "One moment, your honor. Will your honor kindly recollect that the prisoner was intoxicated at the time and that it was not altogether easy to catch the ex- act words?" "Proceed with the song." les. your honor. It was like this: 'Py sha-ty nook an' guggling rill I sawed for thee, my daffydil. I bat my heart, bees till, bees till, an' cried H-ud for daffydil oh, daffydil, my daffydil. 1 love thee still an' ever will. Hie days zat go are all so slow, I mlz see zo. my daffydil,' etc." "You say the prisoner sang that?" "Yes, your honor." "Six months at hard labor. Next case." Cleveland Plain Dealer. Only One Who Did. Grayce- I don't see why you picked out sudl n feIlmv as George to marry You know dozens of better looking. brainier and richer men. Gladys That's very true. Grayee Then why are you going to marry George? Gladys -Simply because he has asked me to, my dear. Louisville Courier Journal. .Instated IIIn Own Defeat. "Home, my dear, is that certain place wherever two people of opposite sex can make themselves happy," said he as a clincher. "How convenient!" exclaimed she. brightening up suddenly. "I hope It does not matter to you, but I have de cided to live with my father." Cincin nati Commercial Tribune. Choice of Erllfi. Tommy (dressed for evening party) Mother, shall I wash my hands or put on gloves? lie llnd Some. Kocruit (with young lady on his arm, meets his sergeant) Ult. ah, good even In, sergeant. This Is erer 1113 cous in. Sergeant (with sardonic smile) Yes, 1 know. She was my cousin once. - Ally SIopeT's. IIItlhiK Uncle. Mrs. Laker I am a true daughter of Eve. Mr. Laker I'd like to know In what way? You can neither cook nor wash dishes. Mr.-. Laker Chicago News. -Neither could Eve. I.tieliy Dose! Mrs. Kidder Oh, yes, he leads a reg ular log's life with her. Miss Gatissip Indeed? Do you know I suspected she wasn't all that she Mrs. Kidder Yes, she's petting anil kissing him all the time. Philadelphia Press. Ill Kxithcr'ft Wealth. "It strikes me as strange that a mil lionaire's son should believe In an equal distribution of wealth." "He lias six brothers and sisters. and only by an equal distribution can he get his share." Houston Post. 1'arndlne In Advance. "The man died eating watermelons," sone one said to Brother Dickey. "Yes, sub." he replied, "sometimes Providence puts us In paradise fo' we gits ter heaven!" Atlanta Constitu tion. Not Informed. "Didn't you advertise 'no mosqui toes?' " asked the Indignant guest. "Yes." answered the summer land lord, "but I guess the mosquitoes didn't read tho advertisement." Washington Star. Practical. "Never mind your poverty, darling. Ours will be the old story of love In a cottage." . "Yes, but who's going to supply the oo'Uige?" Brooklyn Life. P$haw. Summer. Jumnier. Summer, Jijter at tho Shore. Pop's In the Sizzllngr city Trying to make more S ?. S S. S S. So Sijter dear can wfii A dud" with Standup collar Loaded down with tin. Houston Post. Von Know Him. "Oh, yes, he's a very Intellectual man." "What makes you think that?" "I Judged so from his talk." "What does he talk about?" "He's always talking about how In tellectual he Is." Philadelphia Press. Explained. "Why does a woman always cet off a car backward?" "Because she's never quite sure she may not change her mind and want to get on again' Life. fii r a CHOICE MISCELLANY Bum Cunt $7s;.o(H.oeo. We have the word of the statisticians that the chinch bug annually destroys crops valued at r0.000,000; that the grasshopper eats up $:.0.)00,000 worth, me nessian ny .0,000,000, the corn root worm, the corn ear worm, the cot- ton boll weevil and the codling moth of apple each 20,coo,000; the armv worm $15,000,000. the cotton boil- worm 12,000,000, the grain weevil and San Jose scale 10,000,000 each, the cotton leaf worm ami the potato bug S,000.000 en eli and the cabbage worm .n.i:(M),o00. i his makes a total of $25)8,- 000.000 worth of products that might have been expected to but never do get to minuet oecause oi the ravages of these most numerous insects. And this is not the only loss charged to their ac- count. Shortage of crops affects vari- oils Industries and increases prices. and a deal of money Is spent in fight- ing the pests. Taking Into account sill these things, the annual loss In this country from Insect pests, distributed among the various products, is estl- mated as follows: Cereals, 200,000. 000; animal products, $175,000,000; for est and forest products, 111,000,000; truck crops and hay and forage, 53.- 000.000; cotton, 50,000,000; fruits, $27.- 000.000; tobacco, $5,300,000; sugars. o,000,000; miscellaneous crops, 800,000, and products in storage. $100. 000,000, making a total of $7S5,000,000. New Bedford Standard. The Admiral nnd the Dojc. The late General n. V. Boynton dis liked dogs, says the Cincinnati En quirer. He said one day in Washing ton: I know a lady who always receives her callers with a yapping, snapping spaniel, pampered and spoiled, on the sofa beside her. An old admiral, a friend of mine, visited her one after noon, and the spaniel took a dislike to him. It began to bark and growl and show Its teeth, and It leaped down from Its velvet cushion on the sofa and icgan to make little feints and springs at the admiral's legs. "He as he talked held his cane in his land and kept the tail of his eye on the ufernal little beast. Its growls and yappings redoubled, nnd its felntlikc springs at his legs increased. For anx- ety and rage he could hardly follow the thread of the talk. He took a firm grip on his cane. "The lady said calmly: " 'Don't be afraid, admiral. My little dog never bites any one.' "And even as she spoke the nasty brute nipped the admiral's ankle, tear ing the stocking and drawing blood. "He swung his cane and gave the dog a rap on the skull that rolled it half unconscious into a corner. "'Don't you be afraid either, mad- am,' he said. 'I never strike little dogs.' " Colonel nrndHhnvr'N Moner. I olonel Blythe while in Topeka told a good poker story. A northerner got In- to a game with some southern gentle- men iu Alabama. When It came time 10 qmi ne was way to the good. Colo- nei Bradshaw. one of the southern gen- tlemen In the game, owed him $o00 and gave his check for the amount. The northerner was tit the bank bright and early the next morning and presented the check. The cashier looked at it, Janimed it down on the book, went to the vault and got a stack of bills, came back, counted out 2,000. counted It over again to make sure and then shoved it through the window. The northerner was delighted. He gathered It up, went over to a desk and started to count it. A.s soon as he looked at the first bill he stopped with a jerk and exclaimed to the banker: "You have made a mistake." "How so?" asked the cashier. "Why, this Is Confederate money," said the northerner. "That's the only kind Colonel Brad- shaw has had in the bank since the war, replied the banker. World. -New York Coiiccrnliis: Collcee Athletics. There are certain general principles that ought to be kept in mind. One j . 1 1.1. - . . . 1 U,CIU ls in:lt professionalism, If It uc nonesti admitted. Is not an Im- the same to him. but he makes his cer moral thing. The wrong is in playing t.-iin u-.-iv nhont the streets with tho tho professional as an amateur and iu trying to make yourself believe that your professional Is an amateur. This is hypocrisy of a very odious kind, and its lntluence on the young men In our colleges Is deplorable. Though honest and openly avowed professionalism ls not Immoral, It ls, we believe, fatal to true college sport, for if you admit that It Is proper you destroy absolutely all healthy Interest In college contests. If an athletic association may hire a star halfback, why may It not hire n whole eleven to do nothing except play toot ball? Of course If any degree of professionalism be admitted there Is no reason why this should not be done. But games played by such men would not be college games In any deceut sense of the word. Indiannpolls News. Train or Crinoline f Two ladies are said to have been mobbed in America who went out to shop In such vast crinolines that thev could hardly get through tho shop doors. I do not know which is the greater nuisance to others, a lady puffing out her petticoats like an in flated balloon or one wearing a long train. I am Inclined to think the latter, for the lady occupies more space. What grace or beauty there is in a train trailing after a woman I have never understood. A peacock has a tine tail conferred on him by nature. B:t when he wants to show It off the feathers are stiffened nnd form a fan. The bird is not so silly as to suppose that he would add to its adornment by drag ging his tail limp behind him. Possi bly, however, were the lady peacocks adorned with tails they would do this. London Truth. Hotv He Won. How did you get along with that mining proposition that fellow wanted you to go Into?" "I made 5,000 out of It." "You did! How did you do that?" "By not going into it" Houston Post. Snaring: III Feellnsr. Alice He thinks he hasn't made any impression at nil. Clara Oh, yes, he has, but I'm too considerate to let him know what kind of an Impression It is. New York Press. NEW SHORT STORIES Dr. Peck Obeyed the Lair. The late Rev. Dr. J. O. Peck, so well known in the Methodist church, was U admirer of c6nsistencj When nre- paring for college he attended a co educational school, the old Newbury SPIinrv m v.mmf i tS' , 7i , 7 77 down to regulate Ule assocIatIon ot the sexes. une mornmS Qs no reached the en- tranco to campus a young lady also Arrived from the opposite direction, nml J't the same moment a drenching shower began. Young Peck had an umbrella, but the lady had none.. so he gallantly held his over her head until he left her at the ladies' entrance to tho chanel Being called to account for tills, Peck replied: "No wrong was intended, but I could not see the huH- tret wot when I could prevent it. Neither did I wish to get drenched mvself. so anxr nn nth. er way but to share mv umbrella with her." "But." rcnionstmtwl the mive nro. fessor.."do you not know, Mr. Peck, THEY WALKED TEX FEET APART. that ladles and gentlemen while stu dents at this seminary are not allowed to walk together without permission from some member of the faculty?" "I do, sir. But allow me to ask if a lady and gentlemen thus chance to meet on their way to the seminary how far apart they must walk not to In fringe upon this rule?" "Keally ahem! I should say ten feet at the least." An exchange of notes between Mr. 1l''k nni1 tlie young lady caused tho two t0 reacn the campus entrance tne following morning at the same mo ment, and Peck was carrying in his hand n ten foot pole. Politelv handing' one end of the pole to her, he carried th other, and thus they went to chapel. Boston Herald. A Story of JcfferMon. New York still has at least one of its old time firms of booksellers, the sort of business house which Is law unto Itself and alters not the law to suit tho convenience of any otie. however great. says the New York Times. Joseph Jef- ferson had been a customer of this firm for years, but had never seen ei- ther of Its members, who may Just as well be called Jones & Smith as any- thing else. One day Jefferson called at the shop, his errand being to protest against a long delay in delivering" some books he had ordered. The old gentleman arrived In a very irate state of mind, but soon cooled off when he observed the pained expression of the shopkeeper. "You understand," said the veteran, 'that I don't wish to be offensive to you. It is your confounded iirm 1 am complaining of. If yon nre Jones, I say confound Smith. If you are Smith, I say confound Jones. I don't mean to be personal at all." mind Man AVho Tell the Time. Charles Bohannan of Taylorsville is totallv blind. Light nnd darkness aro aid of a cane and sometimes puts to shame men possessed of two good op tics. The other day Charlie visited the county Jail. After talking awhile he pulled out his watch, an ordinary gold timepiece with a dotfble case, held It In his hands a moment in the usual way and then snapped it shut, with a sigh of relief. "Well, it's time for me to start home," he remarked. "What time ls it, Charlie?" he was asked quizzically. One minute to 3." was the prompt response. Every watch In tho crowd except Charlie's came Into view. It required longer for the men with good eyes to verify Charlie's observation than it did- for him to ascertain the time, but ho was declared correct almost to the sec ond. "Good by!" And he was off without waiting to hear the discussion his feat had precipitated Louisville Courler- Journal. The Only City. An amusing story of Hans von Bu- low, the famous German pianist and conductor. Is contained In the volume of his letters that has just been Issued In Germany. After a very successful appearance which he mado at a con cert In Chicago he came forward In acknowledgment of the applause. Beaming on the audience he began: After all, ladles and gentlemen. there ls only one city" here he was Interrupted by a prolonged burst of applause. When there was a lull ho concluded, "and that IsNew York." Harper's Weekly. A Duty. Jlmson It's very unpleasant to speak of tills, but I feel that it is only a duty to myself to remind you that you owe me 5. Stimsou (turning on his heel) Don't mention It, old fellow. I'm glad you've discharged your duty so well. Pouted. Mistress (trying on one of her .new gowns) Norah, how does this dress lit? Norah (without looking up) Not very well, ma'am. I found it a little tight under the arruma. London An swers.
