Bandon recorder., December 29, 1904, Image 3

evposo her, even In bis «-ompaiiy. t- NEW SHORT STORIES
MLNTAL PROP&,
HUMOR OF THE HOUR >
the sights he hail witntHMed In the
Sarlokie Thlas» 'that Give 1» Ion
, Whea Head Uurlril.
haunted house.
P«rH<ll«e Found.
Biles«* In ourselves.
Opie Reud. the novelist, recently at-
He ifiou-ht and thought until on*
Little Willie's father, la-lng a kind
We each have the need of our men­ num. luul taken him to tlie circus. It
tin«' .lit« rp..ou <i - snapped his Huger» I tenjksl u press elub reception given in
rpoze o.’ Sc
suddenly and after that went about honor of F. llopklnson-Suiitb. The au­ tal “prop.” Gue woman tells me that was the child's first experience, and Hark to th«- Pi tma
in the v,-l. «.
II.ag­
whistliug. A fortnight before th«' day thor of "Colonel Garter of Cartersville" when »he wishes to give decided orders with his eyes bulging he watched the
ing
fixed for the u'ildlug lie drove into tin ' was surrounded by u group of women, to her coos she always puts on bet perf ormers as they made "the grand
Sana» In the fullnesN of Joy I > the «.Ir.
By A. T. QUILLER-COUC1 ("f.")
city again but this time to the utiie« 'who felt It a great privilege to come hat und gloves, then, as she floats into entrance.” His little hand stole Into Hark to the lark in the blu-* h«av< -i sink­
ing.
luto the presence of u real literary lion the kitchen surrounded by a cloud of ids father's as lie moved as closely as
of his other brother, the merchant.
Bidding the weary heart listen «nJ
“I want," »ailt he. "the loan ot and were making the jnost of the op­ dignity und courage, she f«-ela equal tu be could to his prog« nltors side. The
■hare.
( "Pi/ritfJU,
Im A. T. (juUlcr-Covch
portunity. "When,” rnqulr«*d one of the occasion.
£1,000."
clr.Mis music rang in his ears, half be­ Mu»l, flung tree as the air h* is eleuvlns.
Good and well fitting clothes are wildering him. He saw the cluwife go Joy mingled strain» In a wonderful weav­
“Nothing easier,” said hla brother. ' them, "do you write your delightful
ing
N the'kiagihiut ut Illyria there lived
props to us all mid bring about a cer­ througlj •* underfill antics and I,aid his Of melody. Hush. thee, my heart and Its
“Here la £830. Of the remainder 1 Stories Y'
mt
ago ■ pt»* vocsk'Utter,
tain
coufldeme
iu
ourselves,
a
sort
of
shall keep £50 as Interest for the first
“I am a very consistent worker," an­
grieving.
breath when the tumblers rushed forth
Hark tu ths wild bird and banish thy
year at 5 per cent, and the odd £100 swered the urtlst-englneer-author. “My mental pat you on the back, which to turn flipflops high in the air over
care.
should purchase a premium of insur literary work is done regulurly be­ says. “Bruce up, old boy; the shell is herds of elephants, lie saw the trapeze
with three m > m , who la tiers went
tween
the
hours
of
11
und
2
o
’
clock."
perfect;
let
’
s
hear
from
the
kernel.
”
nnce
for
£2.000,
which
I
will
retain
as
Far.
far above the dull earth he Is sour­
performers, in dazzling tights, as they
forth to ser* their fortune«. At
ing;
There was a murmur of polite "Ohs!"
To the little school miss on the day did their wonderful turns high in the
security against accidents.”
Ihe red of three years they returned
Drift» tho song downward from heaven
“And when, Mr. Reud,” said one of of the entertainment what a prop is air. mid he gasped, clutching at his
This seemed not only fair, but broth
by agreement to compare their progress
to me;
erly. John pocketed his £850, »hook bls the group, turning to the author of the bristling blue sash.
father's hand, as if to thus protect the Floods of sweet, unstudied music are
tai the world. The eldest bad become a
pouring
creditor affectionately by the hand und "The Kentucky Colonel,” “do you do
The doctor depends much upon his daring one from going down to destruc­
lawyer and the second a merchant aad
Tides ebb und swell of hts rare melody.
your work ?”
gloves. He cun be busy with them tion. Then came suddenly upon the
hurried westward.
each of these had won riches and
Rising now further, returning now nearer,
Running his fingers through his when vital or difficult questions are scene a milk white »te.il, and sitting Ebbing now fainter und swelling now
The marriage was celebrated with
friends, but John, the youngest who
great pomp, and tn the evening the thatch of brown hair, the tall humorist asked. They are a sort of moral safety upon Ills broad back was a smiling,
clearer,
bad enlisted in the army, could only
thee cureless that thy entranc­
king, who had been shedding tears at solemnly responded, "Between anxiety valve.
beautiful creature, all in pink mid ivo­ God made
show a cork leg and a medal.
ed hearer
intervals throughout the ceremonies, and nec«*ssfty—Invariably!”
For the bashful boy who is deprived ry mid fluffs. She was kissing ner
"You have made a bad business of
Forget hl» grief when he listens to thee.
Then Mr. Smith begun to talk of the In the hall of hat and gloves before en­ hands to the people, the band having
accompanied his daughter to the haunt­
It,” said bls brothers. “Your medal is
What careth he of the world? He la fling­
difficulties
of
lighthouse
building.
—
Suc
­
ed
house.
The
princess
was
pale.
John,
tering
the
room
tilled
with
people
if
suddenly
switched
to
a
soul
stirring
worthless, except to a collector of such
ing
on the contrary, who sat facing her fa­ cess.
some good fairy would only hand him air that added to the unreality of It
things, and your leg a positive disad­
Heaven born songs of delight to the air.
ther
in
the
state
coach,
smiled
with
a
a
book
to
occupy
bls
hands
so
he
need
all. The ringmaster said something; God bade him flood earth with rapturous
vantage. Fortunately we have Influ­
Sorely Nonpartisan.
singing
cheerfulness which under the circum­
ence, and sluoe you are our brother we
Congressman Richard Bnrtholdt of only look after Ills feet what a prop then he snaiqaal his whip, mid the one
That tho soul, weary, might listen und
stances
seemed
a
trifle
ill
bred.
The
it
would
be
to
him!
in
pink
mid
ivory
and
fluffs
stood
upon
must see what we can do for you.”
■hare.
wedding guests followed In twenty- Missouri, chairman of the congression­
A clergyman’s prop lies iu well At­ the toes of one foot on th«* back of (he Heaven, if thou hast me with melody
Now, the king of Illyria lived at that
four chariots. Their cards of Invita­ al committee which acted the role of ting vestments.
gifted.
milk white charger and seemed ubout
time in bls capital, in a brick palace at
host
to
tlie
visiting
peace
delegates,
is
the heights where the wild bird
tion had said “2 to 5:30 p. tn.,” and It
As for the writer of this article—I to float away. Little Willie excitedly Teach Is me
the end of u great park. He kept this
lifted;
an
old
New
York
newspaper
man.
was now 8 o’clock. But they could not
can speak with the authority of most rose and, placing his lips near Ills fa Let thou my song like the lark song bo
park opeu to all and allowed no one to
From
1878
until
18M
he
was
a
report
­
resist the temptation to see th«* lust of
drifted
intimate acquaintance—she must have tiler’s ear, asked:
build In it But the richest citizens,
“the poor dear thing,” as they agreed er and a good one too. In discussing her lialr arranged In the way she af­
Into some sad heart to banish Its care.
"Papa, is she mi angel?”—Chicago
who were so fond of their ruler that
the political situation in his state the
—
J. W. Foley In New York Times.
to
call
the
bride.
fects It and her shoes on to cope with Record Herald.
they could not live out of liia sight, bad
The king sat silent during the drive. other way he was reminded of an in­ life's emergencies. She finds the wag­
their houses Just beyond the park, in
The Man Who Is Twelve Years Old.
He was preparing his farewell speech. I cident in his newspaper career. It was gish old world rather a Jolly place and
The Hopeful Yonng Mao.
the rear of the pulace, on a piece of
apropos of the control of affairs in St.
There's a man that I know, and he lives
which
he
meant
to
deliver
In
the
porch.
frail
humanity
lean-
loves to watch
The hopefulness of some young men
ground which they called palace gar­
near you
But. arriving and perceiving n crowd | Louis by the Democratic party.
In a town called Everywhere;
dens. The name was a little mislead­
“Things in St. Louis are very much Ing gently upon their "mental props,” Is unbounded. At a dinner table the You
might
not think he's a man from his
about
it,
nml
also,
to
his
vast
astonish
­
while they are happily quite uncon- other night some one said to a medical
ing, for the true gardens lay in front of
hat
ment, a red baize carpet on the perron as one of the Tammany representa­ sclous of her scrutlny.—Jeannette student:
the palace, where children of all classes
Or
the
clothes
he may chance to wear,
and a butler bowing In the doorway, tives in the legislature would have had Young In Critic.
played among the trees and flower beds
"Don't you despair of ever building But under the jacket with many a patch
with two footmen behind him, bo
Is a heart more precious than gold—
and artificial ponds, and the king sat
up n practice In medicine?”
The heart of a man 'neath tho coat of a
coughed down his exordium and led his
“Indeed, no,” he answered.
and watched them, because be took de­
THE ROBIN.
boy,
daughter Into the hall amid showers of
light in children and because the sight
"But you will admit that the profes­ A man who is twelve years old.
rice
and
confetti.
The
bridegroom
fol
­
Adapttve Bird, but He sion Is already overcrowded.”
of them cheered bls only daughter, who
He only is waiting to wear the crown
lowed, and so did the wedding guests,
Doesn't Mix Mortar.
had fallen Into a deep melancholy. But
“Oh, perhaps It Is," said the young That is already made for his brow.
since no one opposed them.
The robin is a very adaptive bird cer­ num. and then, with a laugh, he added, And 1 pray that his mind will always bo
the rich citizens clung to It, for it gave
The hall and staircase were decorat­
clean.
tainly. It adjusts Itself readily to new “But 1 propose to graduate In medi­
a pleasant, neighborly air to their road­
ed with palms and pot plants, flags
conditions, but It falls fur short of the cine Just the same, and those who are His body as pure as snow,
way and showed what friendliness
Ills
heart
always fresh and sunny and
and emblems of Illyria, and in the
Intelligence that is often nscrlbed to it. already In the profession will have to
there was between the monarch of
warm
great
drawing
room
—
which
they
had
Thus there are persons who seem to take their chance.”—Baltimore Sun.
And free from life’s canker and mold.
Illyria and bis people.
entered while John persuaded the king
And may he be worthy his waiting estate,
believe thut when mud is scarce the
At either end you entered the road­
This
man who is twelve years old!
to a seat—they found many rows of
robin will bring water In Its beak to
The Return Invitation.
way (if you were allowed) by an Iron ,
John thought it time to interfere.
the dust of the road and so make the
We never may know what the futuro
gate. And each gate bad a sentry box . as the minutes passed and nothing morocco covered chairs, a miniature
will make
mortar that It needs. This notion Is, of
beside It nnd a tall beadle and a notice . happened he turned his back to the stage, with a drop representing the
Of tlie boys that we carelessly meet.
course, absurd. How eould the robin
board to save him the trouble of ex­ . light and pulled out a penny dreadful, play scene In "Hamlet;” a row of foot­
For
many a statesman is doing the
know that water and dust will make
plantation. The notice ran; "Private— i His literary taste was shocking, and lights, a boudoir grand piano and a
chores.
man
seated
at
the
keyboard,
whom
mud? This knowledge Is the result of
And presidents play In the street.
The beadle has orders to refuse ad­ . when It came to romance he liked the
The hand that Is busy with playthings
reflection and experiment nnd Is not
mittance to all wagons, tradesmen's , incidents to follow one another with they recognized as a performer
now
much demand at suburban dunces.
within the reach of an animal. More
carts, hackney coaches, donkeys, beg­ . great rapidity.
The reins of power will hold;
The company had scarcely seated
than
that.
If
the
robin
could
find
the
gars, disorderly characters or per­ i
Ro I take off my hat and gladly salute
He was Interrupted by a blood cur
This man who Is twelve years old.
water he could certainly find the mud
sons carrying burdens.” A sedentary . filing groan, and the first ruffian broke self before a strange light began
—Maurice Smiley In Collier’s.
Illuminate
that
end
of
the
room
somewhere. I have known them to use
life had told so severely upon one of I Into the room, dragging by ltB gray
a substitute for mud furnished by the
the two beadles that be could no longer locks the body of an old man. A which the stage stood, and immediate­
When Old Age Comes.
cows.
enter bls box with dignity or read , young girl followed, weeping and pro- ly the curtain rose to the overture of
Gray hairs do not a patriarch make
Another equally absurd claim for the
his newspaper there with any comfort i testing, with disheveled hair, and be­ M. Offenbach’s “Orphee aux Enfers,"
Nor wrinkled brows a sage:
robin comes from a correspondent. A
In subtler ways we deftly take
He resigned, and John obtained the hind her entered a priest with a brazier the pianist continuing with great spirit
The
finger marks of age.
until
a
round
of
applause
greeted
the
robin
had
her
nest
In
a
tree
under
his
post by his brothers' Interest In spite full of glowing charcoal. The girl east
entrance of the two spectral perform- I
“ four dbmockats , of course .”
chamber window In such a position
of his cork leg.
Ceasing
to love; forgetting friends;
herself forward on the old man's body,
them In New Y’ork back In 1880,” be that he could see all that happened In
When tho warm heart turns cold—
He had now a bright green suit with but the two scoundrels dragged her ®t'S-
I
Then
the
recording angel bonds
its effect upon them was In the high said. "This particular brave, to the the nest. He says that when the young
■carlet pipings, n gold laced hat, a from It by force. “The money!” de­
And writes, "He's growing old!"
fashionable address and very little to manded tlie dark one, and she drew est degree disconcerting. They set great surprise of hts colleagues, took robins were nearly grown he saw the
—Woman's I.Iff*.
do. But the urrny had taught him to be from her bosom a small key and cast it down the coffin, and, lifter a brief anil the floor one day and made an lmpus- mother bird take them, one by one, by
hurried
conference
In
undertone,
the
stoned
appeal
for
a
law
to
provide
for
the
nape
of
the
neck
and
hold
them
out
active, and for lack of anything better at his feet. "My promise!” demanded
WHERE UNCLES RULE.
over tlie rim of the nest to teach them
be fell Into deep thinking. This came the other and seized her by the wrist black mustachioed ghost advanced to nonpartisan election commissioners,
“ 'I want four nonpartisan men in to use their wings! 1 suppose "our
near to bringing him Into trouble. One as the priest stepped forward. “Quick the footlights, singled out John from
•ecu I In r Cnntuni Tlint Pre.alls In
modern school of nature study" would
evening he looked out of his sentry —over this coffin—man and wife!" She the audience and. with a terrific scowl, each district,’ he declured earnestly,
Northern Australis.
"One of his brother members inter- accept this statement without question.
box and saw a mild and somewhat sad wrenched her hand away and thrust demanded to know the reason of this
Uncles rule among the native tribes
rupted him, scenting something wrong. It Is such preposterous natural history
featured old gentleman upproaching him backward. The priest retreated to extraordinary gathering.
bordering Torres strait, where the re­
“Come, come, my dear sir,” answered
“ 'What do you mean by four non­ as this that furnishes the stock In trade
the gate.
lationship between maternal uncle und
the brazier und drew out a redhot Iron. John. "Our contract, if you will study partisan commissioners?’ was asked.
of
this
"school.
”
Some
persons
deceive
"No admittance,” said John.
nephew is regardod as being closer
John thought It was about time to in­
"'Four Democrats, of course,’ came themselves In what they think they
"Tut, tut." said the old gentleman. terfere. "I beg your pardon,” said he, It, allows me to invit«* whom I choose.
"Please,
Smith, mamma says than that between father and son.
It merely insists that my bride and 1 the somewhat unexpected reply.”— see, and not a few, I am convinced, are she'll be glad If you’ll come to tea on There a man is bound to stop fighting
“I’m the king."
stepping forward, "but I suppose you must be present, as you see we are. New York Times.
deliberate falsifiers.—John Burroughs Monday.”
John looked at the face on his medal, really are ghosts?”
when ordered to do so by his mother's
Pray go on with your past, and assure
-----------
In Outing.
and, sure enough, there was a resem­
“With pleasure, Bessie. Tell your brother, and the uucle is entitled to bld
"We are unhallowed souls,” answer­ yourself It is no use to try the high
Kmenon Stories,
blance. “But, all the same, your maj- ed the dark man impressively, "who
mother it’s really too kind”—
his sister's husband cease any hostili­
Emerson enjoyed quoting certain say- History of the “Five Minute«" Bell.
esty carries a burden”—here be pointed return to blight the living with the horse with me.”
“Oil, no! Mamma says she’ll be glad ties in which he may be engaged.
The
dark
ghost
looked
at
his
partner,
Ings
of
Thoreau,
as:
“
Some
clrcumstan-
to the notice board—“and the folks spectacle of our awful crimes.”
There is a history attached to the when It's over.”
Moreover, the quelled combatant is re­
who shuffled uneasily. "I told you,” tlal evidence Is very strong, as when tolling of a single bell after a peal
along this road are mighty particular.”
quired to make a present to the uncle
"Meaning me?” asked John.
said he, "we should have trouble with you find a trout In the milk.” “Tho which is not generally known. Popu­
Tlie king smiled and then sighed
PoNstble W«> Out.
or brother-in-law, as the case may lie,
"Aye, sir, and to destroy you tonight
heavily. “It’s about the princess, my if you contract not upon your soul to this fellow. I had a presentiment of chub Is soft fish and tastes like boiled larly It Is described as the "five min­
“John," said Mrs. BJenkins, looking who stops him.
daughter,” said he. “She has not smil­ return with your bride and meet us it when he came to spend the night | brown paper salted.”
utes" bell, and ft is thought to be a up from the evening paper, "you know
When a man marries in these parts
When Thoreau w*s In Concord Jail final warning to the people tlint if they how many dishes Kate has broken
here without bringing a bulldog. That
ed for a whole year.”
his father provides the wherewithal to
here a twelvemonth hence.”
because
he
refused
to
pay
his
taxes
frightening
of
the
bulldog
out
of
Ills
"I’ll warrant I’d make her," said
purchase the bride, but it is the mater­
“H'm!” said John to himself. "They wits has always been our most effec­ Emerson called upon him and remark­ do not really hurry up at the end they lately?"
John.
will be late. As a matter of fact, it has
“Yes,” said John. “What of It?”
nal uncle who makes the actual pay­
are three to one, and after all it's what tive bit of business.”
ed, "Henry, I am very much surprised a far older history. In earlier days it
"I’ll warrant yon could not,” said the I came for. I suppose," he addl'd aloud,
"Well,” continued Mrs. BJenkins, ment and who acquires the credit at­
Hereupon the dark ghost took anoth­ to see you here.” To which Thoreau was not customary to have sermons so “there is something In tlie paper here tached thereto.
king. "She will never smile again until "some form of document is usual in
er tone. "Our fair but unfortunate vic­ replied, “I am very much surprised frequently as is now the case. On spe­ nbout steel plates. I don't know Just
she Is married."
A man In those parts may not utter
these cases?”
tim has a sore throat tonight,” he an­ that you are not here.”
"Then,” answered John, “speaking In
cial occasions nn instruction was given what they are, but I should think they the names of his wife’s relations, and
The dark man drew out pen and nounced. “The performance Is conse­
Emerson
told
the
story
of
Mrs.
Tho
­
a humble way, as becomes me, why the parchment. "Hold forth your hand,”
or a sermon was preached, and on might be Indestructible.”—Somerville when he speaks to his father or moth­
dickens alive don’t you marry her,up he commanded, and as John held It quently postponed.” And' he seated reau's call on his Aunt Mary. Observ­ these special occasions the little bell Journal.
er-in-law lie must lower his voice and
himself sulkily upon the coffin, when ing that Mrs. Thoreau wore pink rib­
and get done with It?"
speak humbly, the underlying idea be­
out, thinking he meant to shake It over the limelight man from the wings bons, Miss Emerson closed her eyes for was tolled after the peal in order that
The king shook his head. "There’s a the bargain, the fellow drove the pen
the faithful might understand that it
Where Money Talks.
ing probably a pretense that he lias
condition attached,” said he. “Maybe Into his wrist until the blood spurted. promptly bathed him In a flood of the a time. Presently she observed, “Mrs. was- one of the special occasions on
“1 am a poor man,” he began, "but carried his spouse away forcibly from
Thoreau,
I
don
’
t
know
if
you
have
ob
­
most
beautiful
rose
color.
“
Oh.
this
1»
you have heard of the famous haunted “Now, sign!”
which the clergy would address their if the devotion of a true and loving her home and must sue for peace.
Intolerable!” he exclaimed, starting to served that my eyes are shut” “Yes, flocks.—London Globe.
house In Punslnby square?”
heart goes for anything with you I”—
“Sign!" said the other villain.
madam,
I
have
observed
it
”
“
I
don
’
t
bls feet,
"I’ve always gone by the spelling
“Oh, it goes with me all right,” in­
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.
“Sign!” said the lady.
“It Is not first rate. I agree,” said like to sec a person of your age guilty
and pronounced it I’onsonby,” said
Words Withont llhjmf
terrupted the fair but practical maid,
“Oh, very well, miss; If you’re In the
of levity In dress.”—Christian Register.
John.
John,
“
but
such
as
It
is
we
had
bet-
Culm,
cusp,
re
­
Bulb
has
no
rhyme,
"but I'm afraid It won't go with the
Business, like your salary, might al­
swindle, too, my mind is easier,” said
"Well, the condition Is that every John, and signed his name with a flour­ ter go through with it. Should the
cumb, gulf, month, doth, amongst, are grocer and butcher.”—Cleveland Plain ways be better.
Mere
Bowin*
Harmle«».
suitor for my daughter's hand must ish. “But a bargain Is a bargain, and company doubt Its genuineness I can
other rhymeless words having the Dealer.
The croquette is the old fashioned
Ills former parishioners In this city
spend a night alone In that house, and what security have I for your part in go around afterward and show the
sound of u ns in but. Few patrician
hash ball after it gets into society.
recall
now
many
Just
and
smart
ob
­
brand on the cork.” Here be tapped
If he survives and is ready to perse­ it?”
Not Up to the Mark.
words in the language have this vowel
Some people are too insistent on tho
vere with Ills wooing he must return a
the leg which he had been careful to servations of the late Rev. Dr. George sound, so commonplace and without
Bragg- No man can call me a liar right to be fools in their own way.
“Our Bignature!” said the priest terri­ bring with him.
Lorimer
in
his
private
Intercourse.
A
year later with his bride and spend the
was
with
Impunity.
Pd
tight
him
if
he
dignity; hence poets turn to it only
When n young man refuses to work,
bly, nt the same moment pressing his
Before this evidence of contract the few weeks before he left for Europe for blood, flood and a few similar tur­ seven feet high.
night of his marriage there.”
that is the beginning of nil Ills other
branding Iron Into John's ankle. A ghosts' resistance «rollapsed.
on
that
ill
fated
Journey
he
met
at
her
They
“And very handy,” said John, “for
Quarles I said you were a liar. What troubles.
bulent monosyllables. They use it
there's a wedding cake shop at the cor­ smell of burnt cork arose as John seated themselves on the coffin and be­ residence a wealthy and capable New often, however, in forcing the accent are you going to do nbout it?
stooped
and
clapped
bls
hand
over
the
gl<d
again.
“
Unhappily
When you abuse a boy for being
York
woman
who,
under
the
Influence
ner."
gan the casting of dice. The perform­
Bragg Huh! You’re not seven feet
i. one again.
hundred and flfty- scorched stocking. When he looked up ance proceeded, but In a half hearted of one of the oriental propagandists from the antepenultimate syllable to
worthless, remember how worthless
The king alglgHl
high.
-Philadelphia
Ledger.
the
final,
where
Its
unpleasant
sound
Is
again Ills visitors had vanished, and and perfunctory manner, notwithstand­ among us, had fallen Into curious re­
you were at his age.
none survives.
concealed by the softened stress. Thus
Some people say farming la so much
five have undertaken the adventure, a moment later the strange light, too, ing the vivacious efforts of the lime­ ligious practices. She received him in has many rhymes, such as felicitous,
Troable.
a room where rested on a pedestal a
easier than it used to be. Still, if a
and not a man of them but has either died away.
light man.
An
Irlshman
carne
to
a
doctor
com-
mysterious,
inglorious,
etc.
—
London
But the coffin remained for evidence
lost hla wits or run for it"
The tall ghost struck his brow and hideous Indian Idol.
pialnlng tlint he liad nolses in bis head. farmer does his duty even In these
"Do you object, doctor, to idols as Chronicle.
"Well,” said John, “I’ve been afraid that he had not been dreaming. John fled from the stage. There were cries
“OI have thlm arl the toime," he days he knows he has a Job.
lit a candle and examined It. “Just the
There Is a good deal in print about
A Plenimnt ProBpect,
of a great many men”—
of "Call him back!” but John explain­ such?” she asked, half deprecatlngly,
sald,
”an' sometoimes OI can liear thlm
'That's a poor confession for a sol­ thing for me!” he exclaimed, finding It ed that this was part of the drama, half In the tone of challenge.
He—Here is good news for women. fifty feet away!"—Llpplncott's Maga the contnglous laugh, but how often
to
be
a
mere
shell
of
pine
boards,
“Not at all, madam, not at all.”
do you hear it? The writer of this
dier," put hi the king.
A high medical authority says that the xine.
ami no encores would be allowed,
"You would be shocked, I suppose, to little toe will gradually disappear. Rhe
knows tint two people of all bls ac-
—“when they all happened to come loosely nailed together and painted whereupon th«* audience fell to hiss­
black. "I was beginning to Shiver.”
qualntance who have a laugh that Is
A Man’« Opinion.
—Why is that good for women? He—
at me together. But I’ve never yet He knocked the coffin to pieces, cram­ ing the villain, who now sat alone, with see me bow before mine?”
“Certainly not Bow as often as you Why, if the little toe disappears, why
Lady Customer -Do you think that n contagious.—Atchison Globe.
met the ghost that could frighten me.
the most lifelike expression of ma­
please before your Idol, so long as you not the others? And If they all dis photograph of a woman In order to be
and if your majesty will give me the med them Into the fireplace and very lignity.
The Kicker's Trademark.
latchkey I'll try my luck this very soon had a grand fire blazing, before
"Oh. hang It!" he expostulated after do not forget that it Is an Idol.”—New appear women will be able to wear good should necessarily be deceiving?
which he sat and finished hfs penny
Photographer If it Is a true like' ....in tin- English bunting held it is the
smaller shoes. Brooklyn Life.
night.”
MWulie. "1 am doing this under pro­ York Mall,
custom to mark kicking horses by ty­
ness yes.- Detroit Free Press.
It could not be done In this free dreadful and so dropped off Into a test, and yon need not make it worse
A Good Role.
ing a piece of red ribbon around their
Taking Him Down.
and easy way. but at 8 o’clock, after sound sleep.
for a fellow. I draw the line at hiss­
Delegate
McGuire
of
Oklahoma
tells
tails. Experienced hunters are on the
The lord chamberlain arrived early ing."
When Marguerite Proposed to Me
"Yes,” said the pompous man, "we
John had visited the palace and taken
of
n
conversation
between
two
Irish
­
careful lookout for all such animals,
an oath In the princess’ presence in the morning and, finding him _ “It's the usual thing,” explained John men llrlnp In that tersRcrj-. Tbv oa-a move In the best society when we're tit When Marguerite propored to me.
Oh. subtlleiy she did the deed,
stretched there, ct fir.it -broke lulu affably.
and should It happen that the steeds
(which was hla first sight of her), be
was lecturing the other upon his fre­ home.”
And not as mankind did she plead,
are running close to one another the
“
Yes,"
replied
the
man
with
the
cold
waa dHrcn down tn the how hexide lamentations over the fate of yet an­
When Marguerite proposed to me.
But when the ghostly lady walked on quent exhibitions of ill temper, which
equine with the ribbon bedecked tall
other
personable
young
man,
but
soon
Rhe
uttered
not
a
single
word.
gray
eye.
"I
have
some
friends
in
that
and In the act of falling on her fa­ often led him luto fistle encounters, In
the lord chamberlain, who admitted
Is given a wide berth, ns it is more
Her drooping eyelids hardly stirred,
him to the black front hall and. slam­ chunged Lis tune when John sat up ther's body was interrupted by the which he did not always get the best business too. Do you use the padded
But well I knew, though naught I than probable that It will lash out
and.
rubbing
his
eyee,
demanded
to
be
vans?”—Exchange.
ming the door upon him, scuttled out told the time.
pianist, who handed up an immense of It.
heard.
with its hind legs to the serious dis
When Marguerite proposed to me.
of the porch as quickly as possible and
bouquet, the performers held another
"Re ml tuber, Mulcahy," said the first
advantage of its neighbors. In the ex­
"But are you really alive? We must hurried colloquy.
Advice
to
the
Doctor.
Into hla brougham.
Celt, with an oracular air, "that whin
When Marguerite proposed to me
citement of the chase horses almost
drive
back
and
tell
his
majesty
at
Doctor
—
Oh.
we
’
ll
cure
you
In
a
very
’ John struck a match and ns he did
“Look here," said the dark browed you’re angry ye ought nlver to say a
She used her own persuasive arts
lose their heads, and an animal that
once."
short
time!
Patient
—
You
’
d
better.
And
power
that
love
alone
Imparts,
so beard the carriage roll awny. The
villain, stepping forward and address- word. Bear In molnd the sayin’, 'Si­
naturally is not in any way vicious or
"Stay a moment,” said John. "There's Ing John. "Wliat will you take to call
The longer it takes you to cure nje the When Marguerite proposed to me -
wall* were bare and the floor and great
lence Is golden.' ”
inclined to be bad tempered will do
Proposed to m« that I propose —
longer It will take me to pay your bill.
statrenae ahead of him carpetless. As a brother of mine, a lawyer, in the It quits?"
“
'Tls
a
good
rule,
”
replied
Mulcahy,
But Is It needful to disclose
the most unexpected things in tho w;iy
city. He will be arriving at liia office
the match flickered out he caught
How I to the occasion rose
“I’ll take." said John, “the key which "waste no words, smash ’lm!”—Har­ —Philadelphia Ledger.
of kicking, rearing nnd biting.—London
When Marguerite proposed to me?
glimpse of a pair of feet moving up aLout this time, and you must drive the lady has Just handeil you, nnd if per's Weekly____________
Telegraph.
—Lippincott’s Magazine.
me
there,
for
1
have
a
document
here
Righteous
Indignation.
the stairs; that was all—only feet "I’ll
the treasure Is nt all commensurate
of
a
sort
an<l
must
have
it
stamped
to
Two of ■ Kind.
"Do
you
remember
that
$5
you
bor
­
catch up with the calves on tbs land­
with the fuss you have been making
be on the safe side.”
“Yes." said the young drug clerk who rowed of me last June?
Not That Kind of a Ilog.
A T> poirrnphlral Error.
about it we'll let bygones be bygon«*s,”
ing maybe,” «aid he, and striking an­
So into the city he was driven be­
Friendly Old I.ndy (to little girl sit­
"Well, I should say I did. I lent £2 of
A pompous Engllnhinan entered a
Well. It was. nnd John, having count­ had been trotting In double harness
other match he followed them up.
side the lord chamberlain and there
The feet turned nslde on the landing bad -his leg stamped and flleil for ref­ ed It out behind the curtain, enme for­ for nearly two weeks, "I’ve got a bos« It to Jones, and the skunk hasn't paid fashionable New York restaurant and ting on porch beside dog) Ah, my denr,
ordered a meal. While disposing of your dog Is a setter, Isn’t he? Little
me yet!”—Puck.
ami le»l him into a room on tlie right erence and. having purchased another, ward nml asked the pianist to play wife."
"Well, you have my sympathy,” re­
hl» soup he discovered a needle In the Girl Oh, no, ma'am. He gets up an’
"God Save the King,” nnd so. having
lie pnusc«l on tlie threshold, drew a
Very Careless.
was conveyed to tlie palace, where tbs bowed Ills guests to the door, took pos- joined the man who had come in to
soup and registered his complaint with plays around sometimes. — Harper’s
candle from his pocket, lit It and stared I king received him with open arms.
Mrs. Tufty—Didn't Mrs. Green leave
Weekly.
s«»sion of the haunt«*«] bouse and lived buy a bottle of Ifair restorer. "I’ve 'her card? The New Maid—Yes'm, «he the bead waiter.
ubout him. The room was of great
______
He was now a favored guest at court
“I say, old chap, that's rawther hard
size, bare and dusty, with crimson I und had frequent opportunities of see- in it many years with Ills bride In high got that kind of a wife too."—Chicago lef It, an' I had to efiase her two
flqoRrlnK Him.
News.
on a fellow. There's a needle in the
hangings, gilt panels and one huge gilt * ing ,-md^ conversing with the princes«, renown ami prosperity.
“He Is considered a clever financier.
' blocks to give It back to her.—Phila­ soup," exclaimed tlie Britisher.
chandelier, from which nnd from the 1 will!
wit* whi
whom lie soon fell deeply in love.
The man who always atop« to think delphia Inquloer.
“Oh, not so bad. after all,” replied Is he not?"
ceflliig ami cornice long cobwebs tTnll Blit ns the months passed and tlie time
Some people ate not better than oth­
"Why, where did you get that Idea?
ttie bead waiter; “not so bed. simply a
isl dovfn lik*creeping plants. Betwnth drew near for t*rir marriage he grew ers. but they are ni»» *iutfouh.—Atch­ before he speaks may not say mnch,
but he seldom has to take any of It
Thinking Is the talking of the ■Olli typographical error. It should have He never beat anybody out of anything
the chandelier A dar( «m*r ran along I »dent will thraghtful, for he feared to ison Globe. <9
In his life!"—Cleveland Leader.
back.- Somerville Journal.
with itself.—Plato,
been a noodle."
the boards. Hie feet iroased It toward
the flrvpIaMr, and a# th«* did so Jbhn
»
John and the
Ghosts
I
■aw them «tallied with blood. They
reached the fireplace and vanished.
Scarcely bad Tlit.-s happened befora
the end of tl* room opfaMite the win­
dow began to glow with au uueurthly
light. John, w hose poverty had taught
him to be economical, promptly blew
out Ids candle. A nxtincnt later two
Uiea entered, bearing a coffin tietween
them. They rested it upon the floor
anti. seatlug themselves U|a>n It, began
to cast dice. “Your soul,” "My soul,”
they kept raying In hollo* tones, ac­
cording aS they won or lost. At length
one of them, a tall man In a powdered
wig. with a face extraordinarily pale,
flung a liand to his brow, rose and stag­
gered from the room. The other sat
waiting and twirling his black mus­
tache, with an evil smile. John, who by
this time bad found a seat in n far cor­
ner. thought him the most poisonous
looking villain he had ever seen.
Gems In Verse ]