Bandon recorder., April 28, 1904, Image 2

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BANK WORRIES.
llrrk Fretted ■ W hoi.
1'ear All For Nothlns;.
An ex-bank official saltl that during
Ills <?ar«M*r In the banking busIm-HH be
had kimw n mor«* than on«* employe«
«4 a bank to get Into trouble on ac­
count of carelesanesa in handling
money.
One collector, who «vas n light heart
ed fellow, was going along the street
In high water season flipping up a
Jwenty dollar pl«*ce with bls thumb
an«i llng«*r and catching it ns it came
down. Finally It slipped anti fell
through a grating on tbe sidewalk into
about two feet of water. He made
some efforts to r«s*over it, but Anally
decided to wait till the water wns
gone, and then it was found that the
Coin wns also gone. Another time th«
same fellow was coming up the street
with $10,000 lu twenty dollar piece»
on Ills siioiiltlcr. In some way be tost
his hold on tin* sack. u»d in striking
the sidewalk it burst, and the coins
rolhsl In all directions, A number of
ptsqile rushed to bls assistance, but he
described a lnrge circle around the
sack and, waving bls arms wildly, or
der«sl everybody to “staml back.” He
r»*«-over«»l most of the coin, but decided
to get out of the banking business.
Another time a «’hlnamnn came Into
the bank anil d«*pos!ted $200 nn«I took
a certificate of deposit. The clerk
who made out the certificate was pre
occupied nnd wrote $2,000 on It and
on the stub. When he made up his
cash at night he was $1,800 short. 11«
knew where the mistake was nnd trhsl
to hunt up the Chinaman; but, al­
though be got a clew, he could never
And him, and he remained $1,800 short
on tho books. He hnd a notice of the
date of the certiflcnte, nmount, etc.,
pasted In lits desk and was always on
the lookout to catch the certiflcnte as
It came In. Just a year from the dny
the deposit wns made the Chinaman
walkcsl into th«* bank and presented
the certiflcnte to be ciisheil. When
asked how much he wanted he said
all $200. He had never noticed the
mistake in the amount of tbe certitl
cate, and he has never found It out,
and the clerk suffered the worry of be
Ing short in his mind for a whole year
all for nothing.—Portland Oregonian.
WISDOM OF NOVELISTS.
The great thing to learn of life Is not
to be afraid of It. Jerome K. Jerome.
Audacity stands In the place of an
Centura to those who are not well born.
—Lucns Cleve.
All knowledge Is gain, even the
knowledge of evil. Like eating olives,
ft prepares you for the next course.—
G. B. Burgin.
If a woman wasn’t handicapped by
her affection or need of it, the clever­
est chap In Christendom would be Just
a bit of putty In her hands.—George
Egerton.
There are only three men of whom 1;
may safely be predicted that they will
make their mark In the world the
man who cannot write, the miller and
the chimney sweep.—Frankfort Moore
The life of every mnn is a diary in
which he means to write one story and
writes another, and his humblest hour
Is when he compares the volume as It
Is with thnt he vowed to make It.- J.
M. Barrio.
Soothing Ills I.list Moments.
Speaking of unpleasant surprises, an
Englishman told of the one Jonathan
Ilochell got upon his deathbed:
“Jonathan, feeling that the eml wns
near, gave a few words of parting ad­
vice to ids young wife. He had a bach­
elor friend named Howard, a steady
fellow, and the thought came to his
mind ns he was concluding Ids farewell
talk that If Kate, after he was gone,
would marry Howard It would be a
good thing. Ho told her tills.
“ ’Kate, woman,’ he said, ‘it would
please me dearly if ye was to promise
to tnke up wl’ Howard when I’m gone.'
’•’Don’t ye worry about that, Jonty,’
says Kate in a soothing way. ’Me and
Howard have already settled It be­
twixt us!' ”
An Anecdote of Pitt.
A certain Mrs. Beaumont of Bretton,
England, wlio lived In the time of 1'ltt
nnd whom th«* possession of lead mines
made wealthy aud purse proud, one
dny thought to impress 1‘ltt, who wns
staying at Bretton, with her riches.
She had a most splendid servlet* of
plate at dinner, nnd, waving her hand,
•he said, “There, Mr. I’itt; that's nil
from the mines."
"Indeed,” answered Fltt, “If you had
not told me, Mrs. Beaumont, I should
have thought It was sliver."
Tnklna 1« In Goo«l Part.
An absurd carlcnture of James llus
sell Lowell appeared in a Harvard pa­
per stain lifter he had accepted his pro
fessorshlp. Horn«* one ventured to ask
him how ho liked It, to which he re
plied that he was glad tv see-tliat tl-.«
artist had kindly permitted him to
wear plaid trousers, an Innocent fancy
of his to which Mrs. Lowell most
strongly objected.
Curious l.eanl Custom.
A curious custom Is In vogue In
many parts of India. If a dispute
arises between two landowners two
holes are dug close together. In each
of which defendant's and plaintiff's
lawyers have to place a leg They
have to remain thus until cither one
of them is exhausted or complains of
being bitten by Insects, when he is
judged to be defeated and his employer
loses his case.
Antllenee Vol Gleeful.
“So you belong to a glee club?”
“Well,” ------------
answered the
— youth
_ with
longish hair, “that’s wlmt wo call it.
but no one seems very Joyous who)
we ring."—Washington Star.
Wnll Street Proverb.
"A fool and tils money,” remarkcl
the observer of events anil things,
“soon get on th^ opposite sides of tbe
market.”—Yonkers Stutesmnn
Wltlv Fsperlrn<’0.
Mrs. Snobbs I want n girl nccus
tomed to being employ«si In the best
families. Agent—I've got Just tin* girl
you want. She was employed In s. even
of the best famllh*s last month. Ex
•
change.
The citizens of San Francisco are
justly indignant over the decision of
the Board of Public Works to break up
one of tin* most attractive features ill
this city—the little flower mart that
Im« brightened and Istiutlfled the cor­
ner of Market ami Kearny streets, in
front of the Chronicle building, for so
many years. Because tin* florists have
lundisl together to deprive the |s»>r of
San Francisco of the pleasure of pur­
chasing flowers in order that they may
force everyone to buy blossoms and
greens from them, the Board of Public
Works has listen«*«! to their protests
and driven tin* little l«un<i of flower
dealers from the curb. “Obstructing
the sidewalk,” says the honorable
Issu'd, and yet they clos«* their eyes to
the fact thnt the florists, who are able
to rent stores which they make the
public pay for by charging exorbitant
prices for the fragile, |s*risliable little
luxuries, have plants ami greens fr«-
qiiently on the sidewalk, particularly
on rainy «lays, which are greater ob­
structions than the curb verniers. The
latter keep their |«la<«*s but the former
are imliflerent as to the convenience of
[s'destrians, (MMsibly holding to thepl«*a
that (««ssession is nine points of th«* law.
It is simply a ease of the big fish swal­
lowing the little ones. What do these
well-to-do florists care that they are
taking the livelihood from numerous
men who have families to support and
who have stood patiently in cold,
stormy weather, under the broiling
sun and in the face of tem|s*stuous
winds that threatened to blow them
ami their wares from their ]«osition on
the curb, holding out their dainty little
bunches of flowers ami charging the
modest sum of ten cents for them. The
florists w ho are liehind this movement
to banish the flower venders from the
streets would charge from twenty-five
to fifty cents for the same bouquet.
What is it to them that th«* people who
have been in the habit of taking a
bunch of violets ami maidenhair, or i
few roses or carnations, or a handful of
golden daflislils, or a bunch of fragrant
mignonette home to brighten the house­
hold ami make some heart glad, must
go empty-handed now? That is not
their lookout they would tell you, if
you should mention the injustice of the
matter to them. They are not think­
ing of anything but the extra nickels
ami dimes they will take from the men
whose bread ami butter depend upon
these sales. It shows the greed ami
avarice of the florists who would <l«~
prlve these men of a living ami San
Francisco of one of the brightest ami
most attractive features. Not alone
did our own residents admire and a|e
pr«*ciate this daily exhibition of Califor­
nia’s floral treasures, but to the Eastern
visitor it was a wonder and source of
delight. Even our wil«l flowers were
sold in great «dusters, giving the stran­
gers within our gates a very g<s>d idea of
w hat our hills ami valleys could pro­
duce in that line.
Men and women in all stations of life
have risen up and a mighty protest
from an indignant people has gone
forth at tlie injustice, and the president
of the Board of Works (Schmitz by
name) smiles serenely and says the
protests only serve to make him more
determined than ever to drive the floral
venders away from the Chronicle cor­
ner flower market. All honor to the
managers of the Chronicle for the stand
they have taken in defense of this little
llower mart, the pride of Sail Fran­
cisco's flower lovers. They have only
voiced the storm of protest that has
gone up from all over the city. Not
alone do the llower venders and their
families, the people who cam lot att brd
to patronize the Aorists sutler, but the
large number of |n*<«ple who reside out­
side of San Francisco who have raised
flowers to supply these busy dealers
ami who find their occupation nearly
gone. The ladies of San Francisco who
have been in the habit of patronizing
the florists to the amount of many dol­
lars every month could do wonders
toward bringing these people to terms
by patronizing the strict venders and
giving them the orders for flowers and
Moral garniture for their homes. Possi­
bly the street venders would not be
able to supply them with orchids, lilics-
of-the-valley and other high-priced
Mowers, but they could get along for
the sake of aiding this worthy cause in
this tight of flower venders versus the
Aorists until things could right them­
selves and justice lie done, not only to
the flower venders, but the city at
Imge.
Italian Swiss Colony, la-iter fcn«>wn to
many as the \ «» 1 '«dobjf, had its usual
tine exhibit in w lué- and eltrusfruits.
Their Resign this year was u miniature
w ine tank in lemons and ««ranges and
an exact represenIRliteli of their famous
win«* tank at Asti, which is th«* latg«-st
tank in th«* world. The colony lm«l an
eM'cllent exhibition of its difl'erent re­
sources and held the attention of the
big crowds. Th«' Proton Colony also
luol a tine display. Ingenious hands
lm«l fashioned from several varieties of
lemons and orangi s an exact represen­
tation of the store at Preston. Several
hundred Incandescent lights llluini-
naUsl th«* pavilion and cast a glow over
th«* brilliant acene. Every train over
tlu* California Northwestern Railway
brought its acores of visitors ami the
people from San Francisco to Willits
t«s«k ndvantag«* of the excursion rates
which this |s«pular company never
fails to give, and defle«i the storms.
While the heavy rains doubtless kept
many at home, still there were enough
sightseers to Mil the pavilion day ami
night. Nearly every visitor to the Cit­
rus Fair came away lailen with choice
and luscious golden fruit. Some car-
rl«l away baskets of magnificent
oranges, others ha«l branches of the
Is-autiful green foliage w ith clusters of
oranges nestling in th«! glossy leaves,
while the jss kets of nearly all the
men bulgtil with the tempting fruit.
The cars were odorous with the de­
lightful fragrance as the sightseers en-
tereil ami sank into the comfortable*
seats to recline, rest and reflect on the
pleasure deriveil from the twelfth an­
nual exhibit of the California < 'itrus
Fair.
BRIEF REVIEW.
QUE&K OLD LAW
.
EtS>. teeath
testnry
Edict
TuR«*«-«, cteowlaff.
In the code of laws passed by the
towns of Windsor, Hartford aud W*‘th
eratleM In the 'Years 1738-31» may 1*
found the follow ing on tgtaicvo chew'
Ing;
'Forasmuch as it Is observed that
many abu*«* are < rept Iff uud commit
te’l by the frequent ta*ing of tobacko.
It Is ordered by th« authority of this
court that no persoti under the age of
twenty-one years nor any other that
hath not already accustomed hlmselfe
to the use thereof shall take any tobae-
ko until itee hath bought a certiflcnte
under the hands of some one who are
approved for knowledge and skill in
phyaicks that It 1» useful for him ami
also tliat bee hath received a lyeense
from the courts for the same.
"And for the regulating of those who
either by tbelre former taking it have,
to thelre apprehensions, made it neces­
sary to them or upon due advice are
persuaded to the use thereof. It Is or­
dered that no man wltliln this colony«
after the publication hereof slmll take
any tobacko publiquely tn the streets,
blghwnys or any barnyards or upon
training days. In any open places, un­
der the penalty of sixpence for each
offense against till* order in any of the
particulars thereof, to bee paid without
gainsaying, uppox' conviction by the
testimony of one witness—that Is, with­
out Just exception- before any one mag­
istrate.
“And the constables in the several
towns nrc required to make present­
ment to each particular court of such
as they do underatanil and cun convict
to be transgressors of this order.”—
Pittsburg Galette.
HINTS FOR BRIDEGROOMS.
Plenty of Adrlce For Hride», but Not
n Woyd For the Men.
No White Men Allowed.
Indian Territory lias several exclu-
slve negro towns. On«* is «-alltsl Renti-
ville, after one of the promoters, ami is
located fifteen miles south of Muskogee
on theMissouri, Kansas and Texas Bail­
road. The Creek nation has a number
of other negro towns, among them liv­
ing one known as Wildcat. It is a
Government townsite. Everything in
the place is tin* property of the colored
people. The people of no other race are
allowed to settle there. It is said by
those ac«|uaint«*d with the |>laee that if
an occasional white person chances to
conn* in on business or otherwise the
word is sikiii passed around to him.
“Whiteman, don’t let the sun godown
on you here.” A hint is all that is
necessary. Another negro town is Wy-
bark, located on the Kansas riveratthe
point where the Oklahoma branch of
the Missonii, Kansas ami Texas Rail-
road leaves.
Suicide In a Barrel.
William Gramper, 65 years old, says
a Baltimore dispatch, was found dead
in a water barrel in the cellar of his
home, 1316 North Bond street, by Mrs.
Gram ¡nr. The barrel, which was
standing upright, was half full of water
and only the legs of the man were visi­
ble. When Gramper was taken out a
pistol wound was found in his temple,
ami a revolver was discovered in the
liottom of the barrel. The wound in
the head was sufficient to cause death.
The puzzling thing about the ease is
how the man got into the barrel and
tired the shot. The only solution is
that he IIred after he was submerged in
the water. It is thought that Gramper
believe«! if the shot was not fatal the
water would suffocate him. He had
suffered much pain from injuries re
ceived in a railroad accident.
Endurance of The Hog.
A case of exceptional endurance on
the part of a hog is told by Harry M.
Risley, a rural mail carrier on Mount
Carmel, 111., says the Chicago Record-
Herald. Sometime ago a hog la-long­
ing to Dick Flower disap|«ear«sl. Four
weeks afterward th«* owner, passing
through the w « km 1 s , heard a noise in a
hollow log. Upon investigation he
found his missing hog. He assisted the
animal out and found it much emaci­
ated. The animal liad elimlssl into th«*
log from the top, and once in could not
escape.
Marble Table Slabs.
Marble slabs of colored cement, for
use as table tops, are made by («curing
th«* tintislcement in pro]s*r proportions
on plati-s of highly («olished mirror
glass, then stirring the paste. When
har<h*n«*d, it is removed from tin* glass.
Tliepi«*«*es thusobtaine«! have a )M>lish<l
surface that can lx* improved u|s>n by
brushing w ith a diluted solution of [ h >-
tassium silicate.
A thoughtfil young mnn of Wash
lngton was heard to decry tbe other
day the fact tint, while there is a del­
uge of “don't* and "do” for the bride
to follow, tli» bridegroom must shift
for himself.
"There Is alsolutely nothing to guide
a man but lib own awkward self. It
isn’t fair," hp said. "From the time
a girl Is okl enough to detect sound
she understiuds the importance of
having tilings done properly at a wed­
ding, while tlie prospective groom is
only something necessary to complete
tlie picture. Nothing short of Inspira­
tion can get a man through a mar­
riage ceremony gracefully.
"In order to Impress the bride and
spectators that he Is enthusiastic about
it be appears with a sort of frozen grin
on bls face that^you expect to melt nt
any moment and run down his col­
lar. If he Is too frightened to respond
in a loud voice some of the bride’s girl
friends will whisper that ’it was plain­
ly evident he was unwilling from the
start.’ Again, if he replies in n loud,
stem voice another bunch in another
direction of the church will huddle to­
gether nnd express how glad they are
that they are not marrying liltn, while
the attitude of many Is that they are
signing away their life nnd nil worth
living for. So I, for one, think it high
time thnt somelxxly wrote a few hints
on how to behave, that we men may
appear enthusiastic about being mar­
ries! without being ridiculous.”—Wash­
ington Tost.
THE SAMOYEDS.
A Monsrollan Hue« Thnt Sometimes
Resorts to Cannlbnllsm.
Samoyeds, a race of Mongolians In­
habiting the shores of the arctie ocean,
maintain themselves by hunting and
Ashing. They make use of the same
Implements In bone and stone, besides
cherishing the same superstitions, as
were current In the stone age among
the inhabitants of western Europe.
They clothe themselves In reindeer
skins. In hue weather they wear the
hair outside, and when It is wet the
tunic is reversed. This interesting race
Is gradually dying out owing partly to
tbe scourge of smallpox which makes
ravages among them and also to their
fondness for raw spirits, which loads
them to degradation and misery, as the
Itusslan merchants take advantage of
this to cheat tlnsu when bartering for
valuable skins and walrus teeth. In
fact, to such an extent do these traders
dupe them that the Samoyeds some­
times are reduced to a state of famine
and have recourse to cannibalism. This
seems to account for the name Samo­
yed, which was given them by the
Ilussians and which signifies In their
language self eating. Every year In
mld-Lent these queer looking people
travel down in their reindeer sledges
from Archangel to St. Petersburg and
take up their abode temporarily on the
frozen river Neva, where they build
themselves circular huts composed of
a framework of poles, over which are
stretched reindeer skins. Here they
traffic for the products of civilization.
HtAT AND MOTION.
Vartons Th carle« th/.rit the Connec­
tion Between These Agents.
Economy oi Esquimaux.
The Esquimau wastes nothing, The
The Idea that beat Is a kind of motion
careless white num <lr<q>s a nail or he was entertained by Plato, who makes
throws away a broken t<x»I or an empty Socrates say: “For heat and tire which
foliáceo can. Tfieae' aré seiZed wiTil generate iiliii susliiitl oilier tli.i.gs i'.-re
The tw elfth annual exhibition of ti e avidity by the Esquimaux, who con­ themselves begotten by impact and
friction, but this Is motion. Are not
Cloverdale Citrus Fair has made >■ vert them into articles more ot less these the origin of Are?”
bow and retired with gratifying results. useful.
Bacon defined heat to be “a motion
Great crowds gathered from far and
acting in Its strife upon the smaller
Families of College Men.
near to see the Is-autiful display of cit­
particles of bodies.” Newton, Boyle
An examination of the re**«*ipt»of th«*
rus fruits, wines, olives, nuts, etc., «■lasses of Yale alumni shows Yale is on and Hooke considered heat to be mo­
tion. Locke described it ns “a very
grown in the vicinity of this little
the same baiting as Harvard with re- brisk agitation of the Insensible parts
Eilen of good things. The |>avilion
gard to the birth ami marriage statis- of tlie objects which produces to us
was in gala attire in its carnival colots
ticsof which President Eliot complained that sensation from whence we denom­
of lemon, orange ami green bunting
in his annual rejsirt. Gra<luat«*sof Yale inate the object hot; so what In our
ami the exhibits were tastefully ar­
sensation Is heat in the object Is noth­
average two children to a family. .
ranged. The many different designs
ing but motion. This appears by the
had been fiishionis) so artistically that
way heat is produced, for we sec that
May Be Drunk at Home.
the nibbing of a brass nail U| m > ii a
it would have Isen ail extremely diffi­
Charged with iK-ingdrunk in his own I lioard will make It vs^v hot.”
cult task to decide w hich should have
house, a Iltiry (Idincashire, England)
Many scientific men have held heat
the honor of the premiums liestowed
publican claimed his legal privilege to to be matter, and in spite of Rumford’s
upon them. A large crescent was so
be as drunk as lie liked in Ills own pri­ vigorous exposition of its fallacy this
deftly wrought out of the golden fruit
vate room. The Bench allowtsi the material theory held Its ground until a
that it attracted your attention tl. ■
comparatively recent date, when Sit II.
claim.
moment’yoii entered the pavilion. A.
Davy took up the subject anil by his
I
A man who could fall in love with a experiments proved conclusively that
night it was particularly pretty, as the
electric lights were so arrinifftsi as to wxmuui aftej seeing heT kiss her dog this view is unsound.
«
bring out its symmetry. D. M. Ki«* ft, must hove* a digestion to which an os­
don«i teortaaa.
the exhibitor, received many co •’-pli-i trich Aiould take oil* his phlined IWit.
Mr. Backlotz (enviously) Site haff th«*°
mints from the visitors. Amoffs th«*'
I greatest luck in selecting servant girls.
many lieautiful designs waste fle»-<le-
lantern faced Mrs. Backl«|a—Iten't tall; nonsense!
lis wliteh nMny itegmxl should have
I You mean sh«> bas^reatelu«* in lm«lng<
old
-nite
•
< terr led <4I' <11*- first pr*iteMii. The
tenant telsiff tfl«Y b<te-M*'l>Vge-
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HEW SHORT STORIES
BLUE GRASS
<*« ua Tua. Warahall.
It Is « ball»« of llir Wahush Valier
In Indiana*.
Against I
. Good stories of Tom Murshall arv
often beard lu the c^tmkroom*. and.
though sometimes old. they nffS’er wear
off all the genuine g<*ltet*sa. An Ohio
congressman says that on one occasion
Torn Marshall wus engaged in • trial
befon* a rather ignorant Justice of tlu*
peace. Tom tried to convince the dis­
penser of Justice uml law that he hud
made an erroneous decision on a cer­
tain point, uml for this purpou«* b«* clt«*d
authorities from King Solomon all th«*
way down, piling tome on tome until
th«* Justice wus ready to d«*elan* tiiut
lie didn't cure a darn for ull th«* au­
thorities or Tom Marshall either. After
exhausting himself Marshall said:
“Will your honor please tine me $10
for contempt of court?”
“For what?” usffed the astonished
magistrate. "You have comiuitt«*d no
contempt of i*ourt."
“But,” replied tlie illustrious- Tom, "I
assure you 1 have a most infernal con­
tempt for it.”
Aud the Justice aceommvMlated Tom.
—Washington l'ost.
Perseveraa«*e «nd Tact.
John D. Rockefeller, Jr., at u ban
quet of bls Sunday school class that
was held recently In New York, says
the New York Tribune, talked about
perseverance. It was persevere net*
more than anything else, he said, that
caused men to succeed tn life. After
be had finished his address Mr. Rocke­
feller said to one of his neighbors;
"I regret now that I didn't speak a
good word for tact while I was on my
feet. Without tact, perseverance, aft
er all, won't accomplish much. Years
ago my father had this truth brought
home to him in a little restaurant in
Rochester.
“He entered this restaurant and or
dered some luncheon one day, and aft
"A greet many people contend that
blue grass wns hist found in Ken-
” said an eminent Indiana geolo-
but tills Is not so. Blue grass
Is a native of the Watmsh valley, In
Indiana. It was found by William
Henry Harrlsou's troops during that
solemn march to Tippecanoe In 1611.
Harrison gathered a small army at
Ohio Falls aud started north. At Vlu-
cenues the gullant heroes realised that
they could not go 2oo miles up the
Wubash without feed for their horses.
General Harrison had two cribs of
corn at Terre Haute and persuaded the
men to go on. As they came on with
hungry horses and scant feed they
found th« ground covered with blue
grass.
“Six miles west of Newport, on the
Collett furio, was found a bountiful
supply of blue grass. Some places tn
the bottom It was growing three feet
high, and such few! had never been
heard of by the Kentucky soldier. At
State Line City more blue grass was
found, and from there to Tippecanoe
tlie whole line of march was covered
w ith blue grass.
"The seed was carried back to Ken­
tucky and sow n there, but they could
not make it thrive alone In the warm
soil, and it had to be sown with oats
and rye. Mr. Sundusky told me In an
early day that no blue grass grew in
Kentucky until after it was imported
from Indiana. Tom Downing of Terre
Haute w as an ardent admirer of Hen
ry Clay and once went to visit him at
bls home near Ashland, Ky. After
seeing the One farm well set in blue
grass Downing suggested that Mr.
Clay let him have some of the seed to
take back to Indiana.
“ ‘Tom, don’t make a fool of your-
self,’ said Clay. ’The gra nils Ire of
Kentucky blue grass Is growing
around your house and In the fence
corners of your Melds, We got the
seed from Terre Haute and the mid-
die Wabash and after a hard struggle
got It to grow here In its present lux­
uriousness.' ”—Indianapolis Journal.
MONKEY MOTHERS.
They Display More Pare Affection
Than Any Other Animal.
A wild beast tamer of long experi­
ence tells some interesting things of
tbe affection of animals for their
young. He had an elephant once, lie
says, who did all In her [lower to siniil
her young one. She fussed over It and
cuddled It up so that when the time
came for It to leave the cage It was
simply unmanageable. When one of
the men made a bold move toward the
baby lie was promptly butted In the
stomach and btewled over lu a peculiar
way which the youngster had of ex­
pressing Ills feelings toward those
whom he disliked. At lust by a ruse
the mother mid son were separated.
But there was no such thing as keep­
ing them apart. The baby rubbed the
skin off its forehead and trunk trying
to get through the bnrs, and both
walled so long and piteously that the
keeper was obliged to put them to­
gether again.
A shy baby camel that passed
through the hands of thia same trainer
refused to look upon the world except
from Its favorite station between its
“I AM KESroNSlIILE FOB THE SILVKK '
mother’s legs. The mother, too, would
er the food was brought he was much show her displeasure at any effort to­
annoyed by the waiter. Tlie waiter ward Intimacy by spitting violently at
stood right in front of him, watching every one tn sight.
The kangaroo also Is very fond of
him like a hawk. Except these two.
the waiter and my father, there was her offspring and will patiently carry
no one in tbe room. The silence was it about long after It is ready to hop on
intense. My father tried to ent. but Its own account.
every little while he looked up nerv­
But for a dlsplaj- of pure affection
ously, and there was the waiter study­ the mother monkey beats any other
ing him with the samt* profound in animal, and when there is an addition
terest you or I would show toward to the family circle there Is genernl re
Joictng. A baby monkey sticks fast by
some strange creature from an Ull
its mother, and, asleep or awake, It
known planet.
seems always In her thoughts.
“ 'Walter,' said my father.
“ ‘Yes, sir,’ said the waiter.
MOODS AND TEARS.
“ 'I have—ah—I have everything I
want'
One Woman's Views About Weeping
“ ‘Yes, sir. Thank you, sir.’
at Theatrical Performances.
"But tbe man still stood there, still
“
There
is Just this about crying at
staring.
“ ’Walter, you may retire,' said my the theater,” said the average woman—
"you’ll cry if you’re in the mood for it
father testily.
“ ’But I am responsible for th«* sli­ and yon won’t if you're not, no matter
ver, sir,’ the waiter said In a low, re­ how harrowing or nonharrowing the
play may be. Like most average wom­
proachful voice.
“A man like that waiter, with all the en, I rarely cry either at the theater or
perseverance in the world, would anywhere, but I long ago discovered
hardly succeed,” conclud«*«l Mr. Rocke that it depends entirely upon my mood
st the time. I once went to a genuine
feller.
comedy and found tbe tears Alling my
The Wrong Kind of Patient».
eyes Just because I happened to be
Senator Dolliver of Iowa lived In bls blue at the time, and I've been at many
boyhood at Kingwood, W. Va., and a n play with all tbe women round me
Kingwood visitor to Washington said mopping their eyes and drying their
of him the other day:
pocket handkerchiefs on their fans
“Jonty Dolliver was a shrewd, sharp while I, being for some reason or other
lad back in the old Kingwood days. He uplifted, sat there dry eyed, almost
always had an answer for everybody. smiling.
He was a great Joker.
"No matter what my mood, however,
“One day a crowd of us boys was the thing sure to keep me from weep­
playing near the Kingwood school­ ing at the theater Is any emotional dis­
house when a natty team stoiqasl be­ play on the part of her who Is with
fore us, and a man In a red necktie me. 1 can attend the weepiest kind of
said;
n play unmoved with my sister, for she
“ ’Boys, I’m looking for a doctor. I starts In way ahead of time, making
may say I'm looking for tlie best doctor me feel more like laughing than cry­
hereabouts They tell me that a better fog and then when the true lachry­
man than old Dr. Blank can’t be found mose opportunity arrives it Amis me
In Kingwood or Masontown or Wl.it pathos pr«x«f. This is the only way by
sell or Cuzzart. Hus Dr. Blunk many which I may make myself Immune
patients, boys?'
from weeping at theaters upon all oc-
“'Kot alive,’ said young DeB-'rv r.irium».'* Fhlladclphta Inquirer.
winking at us."
Remedy For n Cold.
Well Smoked.
"We desire a remedy for n cold."
says the Baltimore News, “and for tlie
Information of those who may make
suggestions we mention thnt we have
already taken the following: Quinine,
rock and rye, lemon hot, hot toddy,
Irish moss ten, beef ten In quantities,
hot milk, mustard plaster (externally),
mustard plaster (Infernally), liot water
bag, steam bath, hot Irons, X's mix
Mot Intrtln».
ture, bronchial troches, hot baths ad
“His your father a bad cold?”
“No, Indeed. He Is merely rending Infinitum, Aniseed, nausea, nil the ten
the Russian Japanese war news aloud.” minute remedies. Stlekem's corn cure
Bump's sure cure for hog cholera,
—Washington Star.
Dover's powders and two different
prescriptions of unknown character.
Ot Coorse ffot.
“We will be genuinely obliged for a
“Marriage," reffiarkisl the morallzer,
long list of other things to take.
“Is a lottery."
"N. jl - We tiave also taken n fresh
“Yes,” rejoined the demornlizer, “bit»
It's one of th«* gnmes of chance that Cffld.”
flergymen do not try to discouruge ”—
•«»• ths l.and's Snkei
Cincinnati Enquirer.
L’ncle George Have you heard the
news? Tom Tyler is going to marry
Tbe tsual Thta>
Mrs. Knowltt- I hear you celebrated Tillie West, Aunt Hannah Air the
your silver wedding last week, iff*-11 land's sake! Uncle George—Yes; I
Wise {io. '1 w Jiidg* from the pr<*nts guess you're right. Tillie own« some
we received II think
............
it was our silver p'er — Y r valuable real estate! — Boston
Tran**rl[>t.
plated wedding.—Chictgo Journal.
• o
“I have traveled all over this coun­
try,” said Fred Ross, theatrical man­
ager, to Owen Westford, actor, “and I
And thnt nearly all th«» tragedians of
the various road companies invariably
ride in the smoking car.”
“No wonder they’re called ’hams!"'
chuckled Westford.
o
’ °° &
°
0
o
CHOICE
MISCELLANY
Saved ffg«H».<HH» by Helnn Slow.
There la a Are Insurant'«* company
in Baltimore thut was saved from a
loss of $2<<o.UUO I mh - hus «* of tbe slow­
ness of one of its otlicers.
A foreign company had written a big
amount of Insurance lu Baltimore and,
as Is usual in such cases, offt-retl part
of tb<* risk to various companies. Tbe
Baltimore company had a i-hauee to
take $200,000 of the risk.
Tbe pollel«*s wen* attractive from an
Insurance stiind[«otiit. but the otilcer
who had to pass on th«* transaction
haggled about the rate. He always
does. He never closes the deal until lie
ban thought about It Just us long as
suits him.
Tlu* amount In dispute la*tw«*en what
the foreign company wanted nnd the
Balthmm* company was willing to pay
wns less than $200, but tbe slow mun
wouldn't give way.
While the slow' man was thinking
the thing over the Are startial in Balti­
more, and the foreign company has to
pay the $200,000 which tin* Baltimore
company would have lost had the slow
mun not been so slow.
Aauktenr I'hotoKraphr.
Amateur photography Iodis'd is only
about twenty y«*ars «>ld. From the few
crude nnd unwieldy "outfits" first put
upon the market the pastime in the
hands of amateurs has developed a
great variety of cameras, particularly
for outdoor us«*, to say nothing of all
sorts of printing pajiers, developers and
Ingenious devices for making photogra­
phy easy for the nonprofessional. It
was amateur photography which devel-
oped the kodak and the cartridge tilm,
which have practically revolutionized
the art of photography. To supply the
constantly increasing army of amateurs
a vast Industry, employing millions of
capital and thousands of artisans, lias
beeu built up. It Is entirely within
truth to say that modern ouhloor [«ho
tography, with its many ingenious ap-
pllan<*es and its wonderful utilization
of new discovert«*» In chemistry, bus
been developed by tlu* rivalry of manu­
facturers to cater to the mssls and de­
sires of the amateur.—Chicago Record-
Herald.
American Gold Production.
The gol<l production of the t utted
States in the last calendar year com­
pares unfavorably with that of l'.KK!,
according to preliminary estimat«*s
made by the director of the mint. This
is a little surprising, ns it hail been
generally siippostsl that production was
slowly Increasing. To the miners’
strike In Colorado, however, Is attrib lt-
ed most of the falling off, that state's
output being only about $22,000.000,
compared with $28,468,txx) in 11)02 and
about $20,000,000 in 1001. But Califor­
nia shows a slight d«s*rease, without
such an explanation, ami so dot's Alas­
ka, whose output was $6,021,157, com­
pared with $8,315,800 in I!*)2. The to­
tal production for the I'niteil St.iti s is
estimated to have b«*en $74.125.3IO
against about $80,000,000 for both of
the two previous years, $7t),000.00«) in
llMH) and $71.000,000 In 1800 Spring­
field Republican.
A New l.eke.
A reinarkabh* phenomenon is reported
from tb>* Russian rural coinmniu* of
Sehava, in th«* government of Tzaretf
Koksaka. Inexplicable sounds were
heard for several days Issuing from tlie
earth. Tbe sounds varied from some­
thing like th«* Ixxunlng of cannon to
th«* xcr«*e<'hlng of steam whistles and
sts-med to come from a forest skirting
th«* commune. In this forest, where
the terrified i>easantry gathered In ex­
pectation of some calamity, the earth
was seen to heave incessantly. Grad­
ually huge cracks appeared, water was
si'en, ut last th«* earth seemi*d gradual­
ly to sink, water rose, ami there ap-
peared a new luk<* of considerable ex­
tent, which Is now being examined by
g«*ologlsts. St. Jam«*s Gazette.
The I.aat Tuberoae.
!Ve no longer have the great love for
tuberoses that formerly made an ex­
tensive market for these fragrant flow
era. As they became more and more
generally used In funeral designs the
demand grew less, apparently because
pt*ople associated their odor with fu­
nerals. North Carolina growers, who
have shipptsl nearly all of the tula*-
roses, are now experimenting with tbe
Bermuda Easter Illy, and It is not at
all unlikely that before long they will
devot«* their attention to the more pop­
ular flower.—Country Life In America.
Simpler Than Bertlllon Sy»tem.
The [sillee of Iazmlon have lntro-
duced experimentally u new measuring
system for recognizing criminals. As
It has b«*en successful, it will soon be
adopt«*«! by a number of other police
departments both in Englund and
abroad. In this system only the Im-
presslon of the Angers is taken. Com­
pared with tbe Bertlllon system, It Ims
above all the advantage of simplicity,
ns it can be applied without any con­
trivances and is therefore much less
expensive.
The Jolly Modern Wedding.
Weddings art* much Jollier things
(ban they used to be. No tears! They
are «-onsidered quite dowdy. All Is fun
and light heartedness. How «litTerent
from th«* old style of things! The
« hang«* 1» typified by thnt whl« h exists
between the heavy, old fashion«*«! we«l-
iling breakfast and the light very
light sometimes refreshments of t<>-
dny. London Truth
Laxemhuarff Trra«irr$,
It is understoo«! thnt the number
of French historical treasures In the
Luxembourg Is to be increased by a set
of six Louis XVI. chairs which are said
to have been made for Marie Antoi­
nette. They nr«* upholstered «-Ith Gobe­
lin tu|«estry and recently brought $l««o,
(KM) at an auction in London.
Received Tumoltaoualy.
“He says lie created quite a furor«*
with bls new play,” remarked the first
actor.
•
"Hub!” snort«*«l the other. “He mean«
he created quite a few roars—'Git off
the^stnge!' ’Shoot him!' etc.”—I’M'sdel
pbla Ledger.
-------------------------
o
Very l.lkely.
“I wonder whnt Bragg means by for­
ever talking of his ’social obligations?’”
“I suppose he’s a member of several
social organizations and never pays lite
due»."— Exchange.