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BANDON RECORDER.
HOW husbands shop .
| Blaaee YSat It Was Certala Weald
Met Please the Lady.
The pleasure* of shopping are •• rig
»rously denied to “mere man” as are
the advantages of whistling to fair .wo
man. The decree, being nature'* own,
1* universal, and the attempt* made to
contravene it are few and unsucce«»-
ful. An exception, more apparent than
real, waa made a few day* ago by an
uxorious Berlin husband intent on pre
senting bis better half with a new
blouse. He hurriedly entered one of
the first shop* tn the capital aud rou
nded bls intention to the graceful young
lady assistant. “I want a blouse — a
good one. You understand. It must be
■ilk—the best silk.”
“May I ask what color you prefer?"
Inquired the superior young saleswom
an, with a smile.
“Oh, I’m uot particular about the col
or, but 1 may aay that it may cost from
$0 to 40 marks.”
"And the cut?"
"The cut? Well, I really don’t much
care. After all, it comes to the same
thing.”
•May I aak about the lady for whom
It ia destined?”
"Why, she 1« my wife, of course!
Whom else did you”—
"I beg your pardon. What 1 meant
was what is her alze, at least approxi
mately?"
"It doesn’t matter in the least. Please
■bow me some blouse*, one blouse, any
blouse, and let me go, for I am in a
hurry to catch a train.”
"With pleasure, sir, but if you can
not give me an idea of the color, cut or
■ise or anything else to guide me how
can I hope to suit you?”
“Give me any blouse you like *o tong
as the price is between 30 and 40 marks.
It doesn't matter a straw what cut or
color or size 1 choose, for in any case
It’s certain to be changed. I told you
It 1« for a lady!”—London Telegraph.
8HOPS IN JAPAN
The
Floors Are the Coasters
Maattla* Places or Bayers.
*■4
To start a Japanese shop is the sim
plest thing In the world. You take the
front off your house and arrange your
worldly possessions on the floor.
Japanese floors are raised off the
street, though -nothing is raised off
them. The transient customer sits on
the edge of the floor sidesaddle. A
real shopper who means to do the
thing properly climbs up on the floor,
which is also the counter, and squats
on his heels.
Real Japanese shops have no doors
or windows or counters. Sbop windows
in England do not leave much wall in
the frontage, but even an English shop
window does not take the whole front
of the house.
The Japanese have uot many regular
shops. There are very few streets of
shops even in Tokyo, which is as large
as Berlin. Foreigners never buy any
thing but curios. If they are fools,
they deal with shops kept by Euro
peans; If they want bargains, they deal
with Chinamen.
There are many Chinese shops in
treaty ports. The Chinaman la cheaper
and more reliable than the Japanese.
European shopkeepers do not set up in
Japan for philanthropic reasons. Jap
anese shopkeepers are the lowest c I ubs
of population except the outcasts.
Servants and laborers take precedence
of them In society, and precedence is
the bobby of the Japanese.
You have a different bow and a dif
ferent salutation for a man who is lie-
low you or your equal, and several for
the people above you. You have even
a different language for each, and Jap
anese writing wriggles like carving on
their temples.—Ixindon Standard.
Didn’t Bother Him.
A German clergyman who was trav
eling stopped at a hotel much frequent
ed by wags aud jokers. The host, not
being used to having a clergyman at
his table, looked at him with surprise.
Ths guests used all their raillery of
wit upon him without eliciting a re
mark. The clergyman ate his dinner
quietly, apparently without observing
the gibes and sueers of bls neighbors.
One of them, at last, in despair at his
forbearance, said to him: “Well, I won
der at your patience. Have you not
heard all that has been said to you?”
“Oh, yes; but I am used to It Do you
know who I am?" “No, sir.” “Well, 1
will Inform you. I am chaplain of a
lunatic asylum. Such remarks have
no effect upon me.”
A Basaiaa Banknote.
The 100 ruble note of Russia la
barred from top to bottom with all the
colors of the rainbow, blended as when
shown through a prism. In the center
la bold relief stands a large, finely ex
ecuted vignette of the Empress Cath
erine 1. This is in black. The other
engraving is not at all Intricate or elab
orate, but is well done in dark and
light brown and black Inks.
Belated Kladnee».
Mr. Smith (in street car)—Madam,
take my «eat
Mr*. Jone* (wbo ba* been standing
fifteen minute«)—No, tbsnks. I get off
at the next corner.
Mr. Smith—That's all right. So do 1.
—Chicago Jounu.1.
Be Uee a« All.
H« (who has offended her)—Won't
you took up at me?
■h o It 1 did, you'd kiss me again.
He— No; honest, 1 won’t
■he Then what’s the use?—Life.
¡I
P olly L arkin **]!
»•••
A few years ago it was claimed that
citrus fruits could not be successfully
grown lu any place ou this coast except
the southern part of the State. Loa
Angeles had I ts big orange aud lemou
orchards, as did Riverside, Han Diego
aud various other pitees where the resi
dents prided themselves on the success
ful growth of the golden fruit. Grad
ually the northern part of the Hi ate
waked up to the fact that they lived in
the garden part of California. Many
orchardists planted out a few trees.
The historic old town of Honoma dis
covered that this pretty “Valley of the
Moon” could produce Hue oranges, and
here they were raised quite extensively.
Nearly every town had a few trees,
although the residents made no preten
sions toward planting an orange or
chard. Finally the pretty little town
of Cloverdale, situated like a gem in
the surrounding beautiful hills, was
found to lie the home of citrus fruits.
Oranges, lentous aud grape fruit, sweet,
Juicy aud of the most delicious flavor,
citron, etc., are grown here with ease.
If auyone was iu doubt as to the truth
of the assertion that the northern part
of California was adapted to the growth
of citrus fruits, they bad only to visit
the Citrus Fair held iu Cloverdale dur
ing February to thoroughly convince
them of their mistake. The display
was far more artistic than the much-
talked-of citrus exhibit at the ferry
building iu Ban Francisco a few months
ago, in which many counties exhibited
fruits, nuts aud cereals. The pavilion,
situated in the heart of the town, is
ouly a step from the depot of the Cali
fornia Northwestern Railway. It was
beautifully decorated in the carnival
colora of yellow, green and white, and
as if, iu honor of the occasion, the
accacia trees were a shiuiug mass of
gold aud greeu mingling their fragrance
with the orauge blossoms. The bird of
freedom, an eagle made out of oranges
with lieak and talons of gold, greeted
you upon entering the pavilion. It
was all a glow qf gold, with its yellow
buutiug and thousands of golden or
anges. All of the exhibitors bad vied
with each other iu giviug some unique
design of their owu. The most elab
orate was a Japanese temple iu which
skill aud artistic taste had i»eeu com
bined and in which wood orange., lem
ons, beans and corn figured, aud Polly
ceuld uot begin to tell you of the vari
ous articles that weut to make the per
fect whole. It was exhibited by Mrs.
Brush of Cloverdale. There was a great
deal of artistic carviug which was done
by her Japanese boy, who had em
ployed his leisure time for several
months in preparing for the temple.
The foundation aud the steps looked as
if they were made of black tiling and
put together with white enamel. A
closer obervalion showed the tiliug to
be of black beans apd what seemed to
be little black dried olives, the lines
which separated the eveu black tiles
were small white b aus and corn with
ouly the little points showing. The
walks of the miuiature garden and
about the temple were of the same little
beau tiles edged with the white beans.
The garden was covered with beautiful
green moss, and with its growing palms
and little plants was natural euough to
make one believe, likeTopsy, that they
had “|ust growed” there and were no
fairy reproduction. A tiny hedge of
cedar surrounded the garden, and the
whole was a tit setting for the gleam
tug temple of oranges in the center,
which was hung with Chinese lanterns.
It was a work of art and receiver! the
attention it deserved.
The California Northwestern Rail
way runs directly through this citrus
belt, and I beard oue tuau predict that
it would uot be long uutil every acre of
ground was planted in the golden fruit.
He stated that it was an Ideal place for
a summer home aud believed that bu»i-
ueus meu of Han Francisco would And
It to their iuterest to build pretty homes
here where they could scud their fam
ilies every summer out of the wiudy
aud dusty city, for here they could be
with them every Hunday night. “In
fact,’’ be remarked, “every foot of
grouud from Tiburon to Willits ou the
California Northwestern Railway It
good, lxxtk at the chicken ranches
speckling the hillsides with healthy
poultry, aud tbluk of the enormous
income to this section of the State from
this source alone, lxxik at the dairy
country aud creameries that loom up as
you go wblrliug through the country.
Every few miles Is a protqierous towu
and busy happy people. There are
orchards galore ami canneries and win
eries. The Asti Colony s|waks vol
umes for this section of the country.
Hopland tells the story, for ill this
favored section aud all up through
Mendocino «xiuuty, hops flourish, aud
they raise some the best iu the market.
It looks as if everything worth culti
vating could be grown In this favored
section. It is a paradise for anglers for
the speckled beauties, aud sportsmen
flock up this way wheu the trout law
expires. Itisa favorite buntinggrouud
for the sportsmen, who manage to bring
down many a fleet-footed deer besides
small game galore. Just wait until the
summer exodus begins, then you will
see campers, artists, botauists and sum
mer sojourners fosa season taking their
flight to the many different summer
resorts, the quiet of country homes or
the more exciting life in the many
towns that line the California North
western Railway. I have been com
ing up this way for five years and the
attractions never grow less for me or
my family and at least a score of my
particular friends. It is one of the
countries you read about, always teem
ing with good things and you never
tire of it.
»»»»
The ladies of the California Outdoor
Art League paid a pretty tribute to the
memory of Marshall, the discoverer of
gold in California, the other day. They
made a pilgrimage to Marshall square
to plant the seed of the escholtzia. Al)
around the palms in the square they
planted the seed of the golden poppy—
the Htate flower—which will throw a
golden glow over Marshall's last resting
place.
* 4*
CHOICE MlSCELLAtfr
Flee Table Linen».
Nowhere iu the world, perhaps, have
the royal purple, beaten silver and fine
linen of the old Testament bue& ¡ mm T«
lavishly duplicated* than in the homes
of New York’s money kings. Surely
money was uever more wisely invested
thau in flue llueu for table service.
Within the last five weeks there was
delivered to George Gould oue set of
Uneu table service that cost $7,000. It
was a special order uiade to fit a round
mabogauy bauquetiug table that can
seat eighty guest*. The liuen was first
used at the opening of the remodeled
Fifth avenue mansion on the night of
the ball. Spun of the finest Irish linen
the tablecloth la six yards long. It has
a deep, round border of Florentine
point lace, all band made in one piece.
The center ia solid lace. The lace was
designed specially for the Goulds and
will never be duplicated. -It represents
months of labor by scores of women
lace makers. With the cloth went six
dozen plate aud finger bowl dollies, em
bellished with Florentine point lace,
carrying out tlie same design of the
wide borders in the cloth. The whole
is a work of art worthy a place in a
museum, where iu all probability it
will some day land, to be shown to fu
ture generation* as au exaimi pie not
ouly of the art, but the opmence of
twentieth century living.
A Destructive Tear.
While the year 1902 was a year of
peace among the nations, always ex
cepting South America, It blds fair to
go down in the annals of the race as
one that witnessed a greater destruc-
tion of hurnan life than has been
wrought by some long and wasting
wars. To the subterranean and myste
rious forces of Mother Earth most of
these calamities have been due. It is
estimated that we have to charge her
unusual restlessness with 48,900 lives
lost through volcanic eruptions and
earthquake. Her tornadoes hurled 465
human beings out of existence, and cy
clones added 240 more to the list, while
other storms in great numbers, but of
less dignity in name, placed 720 to the
direct account of violent winds. Ftoods
swept 345 persons from life, tidal
waves drowned 110, and waterspouts
destroyed 15. To all of this we must
add ,283 lives charged to the destruc
tive force of avalanches aud snow
slides, and we have a total of 51,078,
an astounding mortality from these
agencies of destruction in a year.
Makin* Beau* Meteorites.
Genuine meteorites are curiosities
highly prized by museums and scien
tific collectors. Professor St Meunier
of the Natural History museum of Ber
lin paid as much as $5 per gram for a
meteorite. It is therefore conceivable
that sharp practices should be resorted
to by dealers in scientific curiosities.
A band of meteorite counterfeiters was
recently captured and considerable evi
dence obtained of very curious and in
genious methods of deceiving the gulli
ble collector. The members of this
band were Corsicans. It was their
practice to obtain natural rock resem
BRIEF REVIEW
bling meteorites as closely as possible
and then to burn them In order to pro
Substitutes for Cotton.
duce the black crust which is one of
The attemptto utilize two native deli- the earmarks of every genuine meteor
cute Abers as a substitute for cotton in ite. The pieces of rock were coated
many of its uses seems to be progress with lampblack dissolved In molten
ing, says Modern Mexico. The plants sulphur. It seems, however, that thia
method was so crude that the deception
produce a cotton of two classes; the
was easily discovered, and the men
smaller one gives a cofl'ee-eolored seed were forthwith arrested.
and grows and multiplies without any
special care all the year round; its fibre
Soap Made of Oats.
is thicker than that of the common cot
“Soup made of oats? Why, certain
ton. The seed of the other plant is of ly. And it’s good, too, let me tell you,”
a light blue color; this plant requires said the manager of an uptown free
special cultivation and irrigation, with soup kitchen. “I know that wheu we
out which it will give oue crop in the think of oats we generally have in
mind an article of food for horses, but
year; the fiber is finer than the other,
the grain really contains a great deal
and as fine as the 11 nest cotton. Hilario of nutriment that may be applied to
Cuevas of Ban Luis Hoyatlan, in the the human being. I need only instance
state of Jalisoc, who first experimented oatmeal. Still, it is somewhat star
with these two plants, is distributing tling to think of oat soup, isn’t it? We
seeds all over the hot lauds, for which began the experiment a short time
ago and found that it worked not only
it is most suited.
to our satisfaction, but to the satisfac
tion of the people who come every day
A Curious Pulpit.
for soup. At first we didn't tell them
The oak pulpit in the Seaman's what it was, but when they expressed
Church at Hunderland can certainly themselves in favor of the innovation
claim tot>e a curio in the way of pul we let them into the secret. And there’s
pits. It Is built of w«sxl in the shape no kick coming either.”—Philadelphia
of a boat’s bow, and bears ou the guu- Record.
Another quaint design was a rocking
chair made entirely of oranges, and ex
hibited by Mis. J. Cameron. One little
boy said he would like to “sit in that
obair ail day and just eat oranges.’’
Then there was a bridge of oranges wale in letters of gold the inscription:
spanning the mossy banks of the pret “Nevertheless at Thy Word 1 Will Let
tiest little pond of clear water in which Down the Net.’’ The pulpit was the
a myriad of tiny fish swarm merrily gift of the naval officers and men of the
among the rocks. Ferns and maiden Midway flotilla of torpedo boat de
hair made this* most Inviting little re stroyers in acknowledgment of the
treat, but then there was a big sign on kindness received during their visit to
both euds of the bridge warning you Hunderland in May, 1901.—Boston Tran
that there was a flve-dollar flue for script.
driving or walking over this golden
The Carat.
span. There were various other designs
Wo talk of a diamond being so many
and all worthy of special mention, but
The carat was
if I stopped to do that I would have to carats In weight.
say “this article is to be continued in originally the seed of the Abyssinian
These seeds are very
our next.” They had one long table carat flower.
which was covered with fine oranges, equal in size and so were at one time
lemons, grape fruit, citron, prunes, used in weighing gold and precious
nuts, etc. The English walnuts were stones.
To-day the carat as applied to gold
the tiueet and largest I have ever seen.
Oue table was devoted entirely to means simply the twenty-fourth part
olive«, the green and the ripe, and I of the weight of any piece of gold or
have seen ol ves aud olives and eaten alloy of gold.
them as well, but 1 have never tasted
L
Historic Relic.
any olives to compare with the Clover
Although
125
.veara old, a watch
dale «nee I have seen larger ones, but
never any with as pleaaaut a flavor. owued by a gentleman in Gloucester
Polly’s memory is faulty, and I fail to shire, England, still keeps excellent
«.member iht aame of the little 'ady time It was worn«»Trftfolgvrdnrtog
who had th«-m on exhibit and who the Peninsular war, at Waterloo,
treated ail with a lavish hand and in through the China war in 1840 •nd
her own gracious wsy to the olive« finally in the Indian mutiny.
A Reminder.
which were raised and cured on her
Dearborn What have you got that own home place.
string tied about your finger for?
Wabash—Ob, I've been getting mar
ried, and my wife doesn't want me to
The exhibit of Jellies was enough to
forget It—Bouton Herald.
make any good housewife turn green
with envy. The Asti Colony had a
Hypocrisy becomes a necessity for
tine collection from their famous win
those who Uva scandalously.—DeFlnod.
ery, and there was a splendid exhibit
of pure olive oil as amber as the ray* of
Cause and BBeet.
.La Montt—Children are so much sunset. There was also a display of
worse than they used to be. What do tobacco, which proved that the weed
you attribute it to?
could be grown in thia vicinity. There
La Moyne—Improved ideas In build- were painting and fancy work and a
very pretty and costly collection of In
La Mantt-What has that to do with
dian baskets, but if I went into details
It?
La
Moyne— Much.
Shingle« are it would take more spstce than la al-
•carve and you can't «pank a boy with totted for two or three weeks to come
e Ua roof.-Philadelphia Record.
Polly to indebted to Mr. T. Witooo,
»
manager of the fair, aud to Mrs. J.
Cameron, not alone for courtesies shown
but for baskets of the magnificeut fruit
deeorated with their owu greeu foliage.
t'
»•
/M ■
■
An Undesirable Place.
Weary Wraggles— Hey! You won’t
git nothin’ decent iu dere. Item people
Is vegetarians.
Hungry Hank—Is dat right?
Weary Wraggles— Yeh, an’ dey got a
dog w’at ain’t.—Philadelphia Press.
Study Is the bane of boyhood, the
ailment of youth, the indulgence of
manhood and the restorative of old
age. I .andor.
Horses are like eggs. It ia impossible
to tell what’s In them until they are
broken.
Things do not go wrung of them-
selvas; somebody pusheedhem.-Puck.
Dlfficalty With the lerin*.
That the diphtheria antitoxin serum
is a specific for that dread disease is a
fact which has for some time rested
ujion a broad basis of satisfactory ex
perience. As much unfortunately at
this time cannot be said for any one ol
the other serums. The serums for ery
sipelas, lockjaw, pneumonia and puer
peral fever have by no means risen tc
the expectations of the physician, and
tuberculin, perhaps owing to the dlffi
culty in getting it free from bacteria
ia little used except in testing cattle foi
tuberculosis.
Hat Etlqaette at Sarawak.
The rajah of Sarawak has Issued an
order to the following effect: "The hab
it of wearing caps and hats of Europe
an shape and manufacture haviug be
come general among natives of all
classes, I hereby direct that any native
wearing such a cap or hat shall re
move it from bls head upon entering
any government office or building or
when addressing any European offl
cer." Siugapore Free Press.
WRESTLING WITH RUSSIAN
Tba Traveler Wasted a Tawel aad
riaally Hat It.
A. H. Savage Lantlor, in his book of
travel, “Across Coveted Lasds,” re-
latss an amusing railway Incident that
«xx-urred in Russia while be was eu
route to Persia.
“Unable to get at my towels packed
in my registered baggage and lguorant
of the Russian language,” he says, “I
inquired of a polyglot fellow passenger
what was the Russian word for towel,
so that 1 could ask the guard for oue.
‘Palatlenal,’ said be, and I repeated
'palatlensi, palatleusl, palatlenal.’ so
as to Impress the word well upon my
memory. Having enjoyed a good wash
aud a shamixw aud dripping all over
with water, I rang for the guard, and.
sure euough, wheu the man came I
could uot recollect the word. At last it
dawued upou me that It was ‘palatin-
ski,’ and ‘palatlenskl’ I asked of the
guard. To my surprise the guard
smiled graciously, aud, puttiug on a
modest air, replied, 'l’alatluskl ulet,
paruakl’ (’I do not speak Latin, I speak
only Russian'), and the more I repeat-
ed ’palatlnskl,’ putting the Inflection
now ou one syllable, then ou the other,
to make him understand, the more flat-
tered the man seemed to be, and mod-
estly gave the same answer.
“Thia was Incomprehensible to me un
til my polyglot fellow passenger came
to my assistance. ‘Do you know what
you are asking the guard?' he saiti in
ronvulslons of laughter. ‘Yes, I am
asking for a palatlnskl—a towel.’ ‘No,
you are not!' aud he positively weut
into hysterica. ‘Palatlnskl meaus “Do
you speak Latin?” How can you ex
pect a Russian railway guard to speak
Latin? Ixx>k how incensed the poor
man Is at being mistaken for a Latin
scholar! Ask him for a palatlensi, and
he will run for a towel.'
“The man did run on the magic word
being pronounced and duly returned
with a nice clean palatlensi, which,
however, was of little use to me, for I
had by this time got dry by the natural
processes of dripping evai>oratlon.”
THE PERIPATETIC BEAR.
Sammer Oatin* of a Mother Grtasly
and Her Yoon* Ones.
There is a deal of discussion among
huuters after big game in the moun
tains concerning the sort of fathers and
husbands grizzly bears make, says a
writer in Outing. The consensus of
opinion seems to be that bruin Is an un
faithful, heartless spouse and a con
temptible father. He will help Mme.
Bruin seek a cave or an opening in the-
rocks or mountain side, where their
cubs may be born, aud he will carry
a dainty morsel, such as a sheep, a
calf or part of a cow's carcass there
for his mate’s food. However, a few
days after the cubs are born in the
family circle he will leave the home,
probably never having any further ac
quaintance with his spouse and her
offspring. Thereafter Muie. Bruin must
make her owu way and provide for her
cubs. Unlike the black bear, which is
a Jolly, fun loving father that rolls and
frolics with bis baby children, the wale
grizzly will have nothing to do with
the cubs. Mme. Grizzly and her chll-
dren are companions for two summers,
and they hibernate roiled together in
a ball of fur for about 100 days, dur
ing the coldest days of winter.
The mother bear and her young trav
el far and wide, moving principally at
night. Kit Carson said that the wide
range of a family of healthy grizzlies
In a summer season is almost incalcu
lable. He bad reason to know of a
mother grizzly and her two cubs that
once left their hibernating cave among
the southern spurs of the Rocky moun
tains in New Mexico one spring In the
forties, crossed the Colorado and Wy
oming, were seen in the mountains In
Montana and were back in New Mex
ico again for another winter before the
following October.
NEW SHORT STORIES FACTS IN FEW LINES
Haw the Tarkey* Were Leet.
There are In round uumbera 4,200
employees of all trades in the govern-
meat priming uukv iu uua city. Iu the
winter of 1888-89 there were about
3,000 men and women employed In the
building. Probably that small army of
aervants of the government uever
heard bow fifty-five girls employed in
the bindery prevented the distribution
of 3,000 turkeys ou the day before
Christmas. 1888.
Mr. Peters, chief clerk of the navy
department, tells the story: “In No
vember, 1888, Secretary Whitney post
polled the preparation of bis annual
report until a very late day. In fact. It
was uot until the Thursday before the
Saturday on which It must be mailed
that he began the dictation. But he
was a rusher wheu be started, aud the
document was written, printed, bound
iu pamphlet form aud mailed before
midnight on Saturday.
“The secretary himself visited the
government printing office and watched
the work of the compositors, pressmen
and binders and was greatly pleased
over the interest which every one
seemed to take In helping us out. Ou
Tuesday of the following week. Just
two days before Thanksgiving, Mr.
Whitney sent for me and said, 'Mr.
Peters, I wish you would go to tile
market and buy a turkey for each and
every employee of the government
printing office.’
‘“But, Mr. Secretary,’ I replied, ‘it
would require 3,000 turkeys to All that
order.’
“ ’It makes no difference if 5.000
would be needl'd. Buy them.’
“ 'It Is impossible,’ I said. 'There are
not 3,000 unsold turkeys to lie had In
Washington today.’
“ ‘Then,’ said be, ‘ascertain the names
of the men who bad the principal part
in getting out the report, get a turkey
for each today and order the necessary
number, 3,000 or 5,000, and see that
they are delivered in time for Christ
mas.'
“Under these instructions rtlue tur
keys were sent to the printing office
that day. The next morning the secre
tary received ten letters. Nine were
notes of thanks, and the other was a
letter from fifty-five girls In the bind
ery, who demanded a turkey each lie
cause of the part they had taken in
gettiug out the report. As soon as he
had read that letter the secretary of
the navy sent for me and, handing the
letter over, said:
" 'Mr. Peters, I have gone out of the
turkey business.'
"Nothing further was necessary. The
Christmas distribution was not made
and all on account of the haste of fifty-
five women to get recognition for their
services.”—Washington Poet.
,
Grttin* Dows tw Their Level.
Thomas B. Reed, a Philadelphia law
yer says, made a political address in a
small Pennsylvania town some years
ago. The town hall was small and
badly lighted, aud the speaker's desk
was set exceedingly close to the edge
of the platform.
Mr. Reed as bls speech progressed
became excited. He forgot his sur-
Red Jacket*« Me
Red Jacket, the Indian chief, bad
more confidence in his own memory
than in books and papers of white men.
There was a council at one time be
fore Tompkins, an early governor of
New York, In regard to an ancient
treaty. The agent said one thing, but
Red Jacket corrected him. “You have
forgotten," said the American agent.
“We have it written down on paper.”
"The paper then tells a lie,” was the
confident answer. “I have it written
here,” continued the chief, placing bls
band with dignity upon his brow.
“You Yankees are born with a feath
er between your fingers, but your pa
per does not speak the truth. The In
dian keeps his knowledge here. This is
the book the Great Spirit gave him. It
does not lie.” A reference was made to
the treaty in question, when to the as
tonishment of all every w<yd that Red
Jacket had said was confirmed on the
document
Aaeuaed Only the Aetora.
his
“Random
Recollections'*
in
Charles IL E. Brookfield, a highly es-
tretned actor on the London stage,
says: "I remember a pie«« which we
produced at the Comedy theater, writ
ten by a popular author and very
strongly cast, which amused us all so
much that we could hardly rehearse it
Charles Hawtrey used every now and
then ti warn us: ‘Now, don't »(teak too
soon on that. There's certain to be a
big iSUgii, and we don t want tuem to
miss the next line.’ We rehearsed for
six weeks. On the first night nothing
went wrong—but the ph>ce. There was
not one laugh nor one round of ap
plause from start to finish
We took
off the comedy in ten days, during
which we rehearsed as a atop gap a
conventional three act farce with □o
literary pretensions. I think It ran for
a year.”
IT AND HE FELL TO THE FLOOR TOOETHEB.
roundings, he forgot bow near he was
to the platform's edge, and inadvert
ently he leaned upon his lectum too
heavily, with the result that it aud lie
fell to the floor together.
The desk alighted first, with a tre
mendous noise, and the sjieaker fol
lowed it in a cloud of dust. He Imme
diately rose to his feet again, none the
worse, but the laughter of the towns
people would not allow him to pro
ceed. He stood this loud and coarse
laughter for some moments. Then be
held up bis hand.
“Don't laugh at me,” be said. “Don't
laugh. I was merely getting down to
the level of my audience.”—New York
Tribune.
Heads Had (brisk.
Mr. Louis H. Landman, the Cincin
nati oculist, tells this story of life iu
the Cumberland mountains In Ken
tucky:
“Jess Cole, the sage of Lee county, is
a famous local character. One day he
entered the courthouse at Beattyville.
Conclusive Araameat.
JHe s»ood sg'i’nst tv. wall
ar/M!e
watching a group of lawyers who were
First Office Boy—I guess ds boss will
discussing a case which was to coine
raise my pay.
up that morning. Their conversation
Second Office Boy—What makes yer
pained him, and he stepped up to them.
t’lnk so?
“‘Gentlemen,’ he said, 'twenty years
First Office Boy—I give him ter un
ago the lawyers in this yere state was
derstand I’d stay Uli be did.—Judge.
men—great big men with great big fur
Queer About the Bye«.
hats as big as bushel baskets. Now.
Sweet Peaee Aasared.
Prince Troubetskoy, the artist, once b'gosh. a man could squeeze an oyster
Rufus—Nossuh! Ah don’t have
painted in Paris the portrait of an can over any of you fellers’ heads ’ ”
mo’ trouble wif de boss at de shop.
American who was cross eyed. The
Uncle Remus — Huh! Yo’ mus’
VaseMah.
painter thought a great deal alxiut the
done reformed yo’ ways, den. Is yo’?
“Widowhood makes a woman unself
matter
and
Anally
made
his
picture
Rufus—Nossuh! Ah’se done quit de
ish.”
cross eyed, too, so that It should be a
fob!—Chicago News.
“Why soF’
faithful likeness.
“Because she ceases to look out for
When it was done, the original
Fell Away.
No. 1 and begins to look out for No. 2.”
“I understand bis friends bar« ail looked at it and said:
—Town and Country.
“It seems to me—it seems—why.
deserted him.”
“Y*a. You see, they discovered tbst bang it. this picture ia cross eyed, isn't
A Henyeeked Husband.
he was sctuslly going to need their IF
Meekton Do you know bow to gov
“Why. no more than you are. sir," ern your wife?
assistance.”—Colorado Springs Gazette.
said Prince Troubetskoy.
Henpeck—Yes, but she won’t let me
"Well, perhaps you're right.” mur
mured the American. “It seems to have
Many a fool man casts a shadow on
a queer look about the eyes, though.”
his life by standing In his own light
The United Kingdom spends $4.400,-
00o a year on ralglns.
The amount Invested in the Siberian
railway is $401,700.000.
The first electrical railway was that
of Hlemens of Berlin In 1879.
Four new and rich tin mines are be
ing developed iu North Queensland.
The oat aud sugar crops of the United
States have each Increased «lifold tn
Iffy years.
So short Is the wheat crop of Aua-
trails that Inquiry for American wheat
U beiug made.
There are 525 labor unions In Chica
go. with an estimated membership ol
more thau 200,000.
The aunual loss of fruit from Insects
Is put by the United States eutomolo
gist at $300,000,000.
A new effort is beiug made Iu Dublin
to revive the old Irish harp, aud it is
meeting with considerable supt>ort.
Ou a round trip of the Deutschland of
the Hamburg-American line $2U0,lMM>
was taken for passenger fares alone.
With a gift of $250,000 recently to
Columbia college a department of
health aud science will be established.
The number of passengers carried by
boats on the great lakes is from a
quarter to a third of a million each
season.
Btowmarket's (England) ancient fire
engine, presented to the towu In 1*34.
has la*en handed over to the local au
thorities and boused In the tire brigade
premises.
The three Swedish pioneers of Min-
nesota, Oscar Roos, Carl Fernstrom
and August Sandam, have just had a
monument erected to their memory at
New Scandia, Minn.
Attempting to commit suicide in the
Dtinulie canal at Vienna a man stuck
fast In the thick lee which supported
him until he was rescued frozen id-
most stiff and quite unconscious.
The Illinois supreme court lias de-
cMed that the weekly pay law is con
stitutional. This will com|>el manufac
turers in Illinois to pay their men
weekly whenever it is demanded.
"Tourists and other tramps may
write their names here on payment of
ti shillings. Proceeds to go toward
fresh paint,” states a notice board at
the half way hut on Ben Nevis, Scot
land.
When the harbor authorities of Cal
cutta advertised for bids ou locomo
tives. the lowest English bid was $7,-
34!). with delivery In nine months. The
lowest American bld was $5,998, deliv
ered iu six mouths.
At the present day many cotton mills
are working iu Bombay, and more will
soon lie started. Already the entire
yarn supply of India, and to some ex
tent of Chinn and Japan, Is furnished
by the Bombay mills.
At tile present day, on the best au
thorities, there are 250,000,000 Mussul
mans In the world. The Christian pop
ulation is put ut 447,000.000, but the
Increase of Islam Is more rapid than
that of its sister religion.
Strassburg is about to erect a monu
ment to Goethe. The German poet
passed some of the ls-st years of his
youth in the Alsatian town and re
ferred to it frequently with words of
admiring aff<>ction in ills memoirs.
Ariungements are.beiug made for the
emigration of domestics from England
to South Africa. Fifty-one went by
the Harlech Castle, and regular sail
ings will follow. The domestics will
be housed by the authorities until they
obtain situations.
The British and Foreign Bible socie
ty Is endeavoring to reach more than
500,000 blind Hindoos by circulating
the Scriptures through a recent adapta
tion of Louis Braille's raised dot sys
tem as distinguished from Moon’s line
system, so long in operation.
A German firm in the well known
town of Essen are making a good thing
out of old sanline tins. Huge quanti
ties of old tins are conveyed to the
works, where they are treated by a
system of electrolytic deposition, and
the tin and Iron recovered for use in
manufacturing metal goods.
The czar lias sent a check for $5,000
to W. 8. Johnston, an Englishman, of
the Tuku Tug and Lighter company,
as a mark of appreciation of the gal
lant services lie rendered to the allies
during the bombardment of the Taku
forts. The British authorities have
shown no recognition of Mr. Johnstou's
services.
In the great walking match over the
124 miles between Berlin and Dresden
for the International championship the
first six arrivals at Berlin were all veg
etarians. Karl Mann, the winner, who
was twenty-eight years of age and who
has lived on vegetable food for teu
years, covered the distance In 26 hours
and 53 minutes. He was declared the
champion pedestrian of the world.
The automatic revolving chain lubri
cating brush is a new cyclists’ boon.
The brush, which is a rotary one, is
fixed to the bar over the bub chain
wheel and set low enough ou the chain
to set tl>e brush In motion when travel
ing. Above the brush is a receptacle
containing a cake of lubricant, which
rests on the brush, and when the latter
is revolving takes a certain quantity,
wlileh it transfers to the chain, there
by keeping it thoroughly lubricated in
every joint and cieamsi from ail dust
and dirt.
The “planter" is a device for the as
sistance of the gardener. It looks like
a pair of large curling tongs, which -
when close«! form n hollow tube and
taper to a point. The plant to be In
serted Into the ground is placed In the
tuts* portion, which Is then forced into
the earth and open«*«! by shutting the
handles. The plant is left in the earth
when the Implement is withdrawn. The
operation of planting and transplanting
is rendered easy, and the coiitrivam*
Is carried as conveniently as a pair of
aciaaora.
KleptoMasiaea Cerreeted.
Ixindon shopkeeiiers in the west end
have a new method of dealing with
female kleptomaniacs of gevtle birth.
They give them their choice between
arrest or birching, and It is said tliat In
one sbop alone twenty women have
chosen the latter. The birch used Is
substantial, and It Is applied by the
manageress, a person In excellent phys-
leal training.
The horse is mau'i best friend ex
cept those st ths raes track.—Puck.