S*S.b
* thrust
BANDON RECORDER.
--------------------------------
THE GERMAN CAPITAL
Berlla O*e of the Cl*aa*ut and Be*«
Kept Cttlee la Harar*.
According to consular reports. Ber
lin. although a busy manufseturing
city, la one of the cleanest aud best
kept in Europe. Tbe smokeless condi
tion of tbe Berlin atmosphere is as
cribed to three facts - tbe preponderant
use of coke and briquettes, which are
practically smokeless; the skillful scl-
eu title construction of boiler furnaces
and chimneys and. Anally, tbe high
standard of skill that Is taught and
enforced among flremen who stoke fur
naces with coal for steam and manu
facturing purpoaes. Before a man can
aasume such a charge be must be
taught the theory and practice of eco
nomical. sclentitlc flring, by which tbe
coal la distributed in such a manner
and quantity over tbe grate surface as
to secure tbe most perfect combustion
of Its volatile elements. Tbe Silesian
coal used In Berlin In most large steam
plants and factories is rich In bitumen,
but would rank below many of tbe
bituminous coals of tbe United States,
and yet tbe long, dense, trailing clouds
of smoke from mill and factory chim
neys wbicb are so familiar a sight to
many American cities are rarely seen
In that section of Germany, where the
Indiscriminate shoveling of raw bitu
minous coal Into tbe steam and other
furnaces is considered an Ignorant and
wasteful proceeding.
Year Ha*n**<l** Cravat*.
■
To the woman who must bny her
husband'* cravats I want to say a word
by way of advice—don't do It. say- a
writer In the Haberdasher. If you
really must buy your husband’s cra
vats, do not try to get a cravat so wann
that It will feel like a mustard plaster
ou bls chest. That might be good for
his bronchial tubes, but It might en
danger his chances of ultimate redemi>-
tlon. It would perhaps stave off throat
trouble, bnt It would be apt to produce
family trouble, which la a good deni
worse.
Jet him pick out bls own cravats,
and then he alone will be to blame for
them. He may not know much about
tbe harmony of colors, but be I* not
likely, nevertheless, to pick out a cra
vat that will hurt tbe eyes of the spec
tators like a limelight at a champion
ship glove contest. He may not know
wliat he wants, but he knows what he
dues not want, and ten to one. If you
have seen something at tbe cravat
count«* that you think I* perf«*ctly love
ly, that Is it.
Keep Aeeo**«*.
Keeping accousta, simple in form.
plain, clear and easily understood,
showing amounts due to or from oth
ers, entering correctly the dates on
which motley is paid out or received, is
tbe best plan to avoid disputes about
mouey matters and relieves the memo
ry pf many unnecessary burdens. A
written record ol a money transaction
has greater legal value In case of con
troversy in court than any verba) state
ment.
The habit of keeping accounts In
duces economy In expenditure and in-
spires the habit of saving up. besides
showing at all times a correct financial
condition.
Housekeepers, mechanics
and all who handle money in the man
agement of their personal affairs will
find it most profltable to form the hab
it of keeping accounts.
How the Rash Canaan.
In measles a rash appears on the
fourth day of the fever. It is first seen
on the forehead, face and neck, after
ward over the whole body. It consists
of raised red spots. In scarlet fever
the rash appears on the second day of
the fever, commencing on the upper
part of the chest and neck, whence it
apreads over tbe body. In smallpox an
eruption is seen on the third or fourth
day on the face, neck and wrists. In
chicken pox the eruption is made of
small bleba. In typhoid fever the rash
rarely shows Itself before the seventh
day of the fever. The spots are rose
colored, and they disappear on pressure.
Heaty’a Ye**c Critic.
G. A. Henty. the writer for youth,
frequently got letters from admirers
all over tbe world asking for hie auto
graph and offering criticisms of his
books. In a story of the peninsular
war be made two boys disguise them
selves by staining their faces with
Iodine. Shortly after the book was
published be received a letter from a
boy, who aald be was a chemist's as
sistant. stating that while that special
Incident was represented as taking
place In 1808 Iodine was not discovered
until 1811, three years after.
Fiekle.
Tommy—Lil Greenup, you toid me
last week you liked me better'n you
did any other boy. an’ now you’reriet-
tin' Dick Trotter shine up to you.
LW— I did like you best last week,
but I’ve changed my mind. Dora your
papa keep a candy «tore?
Tommy—No.
Lil—Well, Dick’s doe*.—Chicago Trib
ue.
CaearitT *f Base*.
his
uxxitb
iuto
his
pocket
for tbe lump of sugar he bod never
'failed to And. “BMDey,” be bad al
There are some things that make such
an impression and are so I'idelibly
stamped on our minds during our jour
ney through life that we can never for
get them, Koiuetlines it leaves so sad
a picture that It is akin to pain; others
briug a thrill of pleasure aud tender
recollections of the days of auld lang
syne. Then again, we smile when we
remember certain events that Isided no
gotsl aud we could only see adversity
and discouragement ahead of us aud
persisted lu liemoaning trouble. We
saw tbe gray sky ami uot the rainbow
of promise arching tbe gloomy outlook
with all its Is-autiful coloring. We
wonder how we could have lost faith
and hope and persisted in dwelling in
the shadow. But some (teople will
dwell in the vale of melancholy aud
sing dolefully, "Ko many sorrows here
below,” crowding themselves into the
little narrow sphere of self and pulling
a ghsmiy mantle over their better selves,
Just as they pull down the curtains to
shut out tbe sunshine and keep their
carpets from lading, while they Invite
mold aud dampness, prejudicial to the
health and happiness of the rest of the
household, to enter and take |HMsessioti.
We meet some people, however, who
refuse to look back on the past. They
have blotted it completely out of their
lives aud they live only for the preseut
aud future; in fact, some go no farther
than the present. To-day is their own,
to-morrow they cannot count on, for
no one knows what a day may briug
forth. The happy-go-lucky who never
knows trouble blithely sing,
To-morrow, to-day aud yesterday,
So runs the beautiful world away.
They live the butterfly existence, get
ting all the sweetness and all tbe Joy
out of life, lie it short or long. They
believe iu predestination. When their
time comes they go, and nothing can
stay flip hand of the dread destroyer.
Why should they grieve and lose the
enjoyment of their time on this earth
if it is to lie short? If they must die
early, it Is their destiny.
»»»»
Polly once heard a beautiful girl—wli«>
fading like a flower from that dread
disease, consumption say to her moth
er, "1 have lived my life sixteen beau-
tiful summers. 1 have b«**n so happy,
so free from care ami pain. Y ou and
papa have done every thing you rould to
make my life bright. I have never
known what it was to l>e sick liefore.
Don’t try to patch me up now; don’t
give me medicine, for it would only lie
patching me up for a little while. It
wouhi 1« hard on you and me. As
long as I cannot get entirely well it is
not worth the while to stay here and
suffer. 1 know I must go, and the
sooner the Udler for you and me. Don't
erv, for it only gives me pain, but just
remember how lovely and bright you
have made all of the sixtren years.
You have nothing to regret, mama,
and neither have I, although 1 know I
might have lieeu a little more thought
ful of you sometimes. “Don’t patch
me up. What Is the use?” Then the
little sufferer fell asleep. She faded
rapidly from that time, and she never
took her medicine except under protest,
begging them not to patch her up. A
purer little soul never took its flight
into the great unknown.
»»»»
Durlug tbe never to Ire forgotten
drought that laid waste the country in
the southern part of California a few
years ago, when nun watched with
auxious faces the black clouds that
gathered, hoping and praying for the
welcome rain only to see them scatter
and give place to the clear blue sky and
the burning rays of old Hol which
burned up the last vestige of verdure
and dried up tbe sluggish creeks while
the cattle and horses died Ly the hun
dreds of hunger ami thirst. The more
fortunate ranchers drove the beet of
their herds iuto a part of the State
where the god of rain had been more
merciful and they could find pasturage.
During a visit to the famiue-stricken
district Pollv saw whole herds being
driven away, gaunt and hollow-eyed.
The majority of them were so emaci
ated that it looked as if it were an ex
tremely doubtful question as to whether
they would ever reach the land where
the water* ran iu swift streams, clear
and pure and where tbe grass grew
luxuriantly. Many of them, w eakened
by their long fast, fell by the wayside
and were abandoned to die, while tbe
others, urgtai by the drivers, staggered
on, the ribs showing painfully In their
emaciate«! Itodies. Ranchers and stock
raiser* who could not afford to drive
their stock to other pasture* sold their
cattle at almost any figure to the butch-
eia, and picking out the beat of their
horses, killed the remainder and f«*i
them to the hogs. YVhat had once
ueeu fertile bills ami valley* were a*
barren of venture as a marble slab; not
a blade of gra«s, ami only a few trees,
dusty and wither«*«! looking, were left
to show the march of the «lemon—
drought.
• •••
A box 4 Inches square and 1 1-5
Inches deep will contain one quart; 8
iiK-bea long by 4 Inches wide and 4
Incbea deep, one-balf gallon; 8 Inches
long by 8 2-5 inches wide and 4 Inch«**
deep, ouv gailoii, a inch«** square and
8 2-5 inch«*! <l«*p, one peck; lfllnches long
by 8 2-5 inehe* wide and 8 Inch«*« deep,
one-half bushel; 16 Inches square and
8 2-5 inebe* deep, one bushel; 14 Inch«**
wide, 23 1-0 inches long and 10 inch«**
deep, one and a half bushels; 24 Inch«**
long by 16 Inches wide snd 14 Inches
deep, two snd a half bushels; 24 inches
One of the prominent young stock-
long by 16 Inches wide and 28 Incbea men of the section, who for the *e«*md
deep, live bushel*.
or third summer had seen hi* vision of
abundant crop* and plenty of pasturage
H Was B*O.
Th* other day a young Ixmdon street fade Into this ap|«alling desolation un
grab, having found a bad sixpence, til the stock of feed had dwindled down
waa trying to make uae of It at different to ■» small an amount that he must do
piacea. but to no pur|x>se. At last he away with tbe les* valuable horses to
went Into a tobacconist's and asked for save the rest, finally, after day* of put
■ threepenny cigar.
ting off theevil hour— for he loved every
Having got the cigar and also tbe
change, he was leaving the shop when borne on hi* range- picked out the
homes that must be sacrificed. He
th* man called out:
came to “Barney,” tbe horse that had
"Coma back here; It’s a bad one."
"Never mind, sir," replied the young ln<eii given him In hi* noy hood day*
star. "I’ll smoke tt if It makes me I1L” ami bad been his tried and faithful
And be bolted out of tbe door.—Pear- friend for many yearn. He had taught
■aa’a Weakly.
him an many tricks, ami even now he
ways said, should die In clover. No
other ha d should drive blm iff bis old
age. A young Hpauiard who had Iwen
on tbe ranch for yearn bad b«en se
lected < mi account of his good luarks-
uiausbip to shoot tbe animals, a*ked,
"And wbat about ‘Barney.’ Does be
have to go, too?” “Yes, dear old 'Bar
ney,' it is either that or starve, aud I
ceu’t see him surt'ei. But let him be
the last, Charlie. I’ll strive aud keep
out a little for biiu as long as possible.”
"Baruey” wblnnied and rubbed his
nose against bis shoulder as if be un-
deratood that be was tbe subject of
rouversation.
»•»»
The day tinally came when Charlie,
the executioner, vame to tbe young
man aud said, “I bave rounded up flfly
b«>rses, and tbe bogs have had a great
feast. When shall 1 take ‘Baruey’?'1
Hliil tbe sky remained unclouded aud
not a drop of rain hail fall»n, aud he
had no excuse left to keep “Baruey”
any longer. "To-morrow morning then,
Charlie, but 1 shall see that be has a
gotxi supper aud breakfast if the rest
have to have their rations cut short.”
Next morning Charlie came up to tbe
house leading “Barney, who moved
along iu something like his old gait
after his hearty breakfast. Putting his
arms around tbe horse’s neck, his mas
ter shed tears for tbe first time In many
years. “Dear old Barney, my trueaud
faithful frieud,” he said, patting and
stroking his arcbed neck while the
horsts looked down in wondej* at this
strong young man in tears who was
speakiug so tenderly, and tbe horse
tried to iu I i bis head against him, then
he turned and lifted his master’s hat
off'his head with his teeth, whinnying
a* much as to sav, “Won’t that make
you smile?” “Up to your old tricks
again, Barney,” said the young man,
gaziug into tbe velvety brown ey«*s
filled with intelligence. “This is one
of the hardest things I have ever bad
to do, Charlie, and it makes a baby out
of me. I don't think I could feel very
much worse if I was listing my l*st
friend. Blindfold him and see that
your aim is steady and true. Make
quick work out of it and set* that the
first shot kills. Now lake him. (lood-
by, old friend, g<s>d-l>y,’* he said, put
ting liis arms around his neck and
crying softly to himself. Charlie, who
was as much a lover of horses as his
employer, anil who had always tieen
particularly fond of Barney, looke<l the
other way, and there was a suspicious
moistureals>ut his eyes. “Khali we go?”
he finally asked, feeling that something
must be done to break up the affecting
little scene. “Yes, take him and be
g«MMi to him, Charlie, (hxxi-by, dear
old Barney,” he said, turning away.
But he bad not gone but a few feet
when Barney’s velvety nose was thrust
over his shoulder. The horse turned
twice and followed his master before
Chariiesucceed«*! in leading him away.
Then he kept looking back and whin
nying. When Charlie returue«! to tbe
house he said, "It is all over. Only
netsied one shot, and he never knew
what hurt him.” “What did you do
with him, (.'barlie?” "Buried him un
der that big tree up there. I couldn’t
ever give Barney to the hogs. I knew
you c<Hildu’t stand that.” A few days
after Charlie handed tbe young man a
beautiful bridle aud whip made out of
glossy horsehair. “1 thcught that you
would like it to re mem tier Barney,” he
said. “He always had such a beautiful
mane and tail. I’m glad it's all over,
for Barney will never suffer from huu-
ger again.” “Ho am I, Charlie.”
BRIEF REVIEW
How Water Freezes.
MIXED THE LETTERS.
Seri*** Resalt at * Feel
Tvyl»«
lu Be Face! leas-
A well known citizen of Clay Center
had Isen Invited to an evening party.
He wanted to go. but his wife declared
that sbe had no gown suitable for the
occasion and asked him to »end “re
gret*" to tlirir hoctesa. The man went
down to Ills office and penned this face
tious note of declination:
"We regrot that your kind invitation
must l»e declined for all the convention
al reason*, but the real reason ia that
half the family bn* nothing to wear.
My wife's latest drew is over three
week* old, ami her hat 1» twelve hour,
out of date. You will appreciate the
hopelessness of tbe occasion and ex
cuse us.”
He thought this pretty good, un«l he
del.*rmin«*l to write a note to his wife
also explaining that he would not be at
home for an curly dinner, as she bad
asked him. He said In this note:
"I have turned down your Invitation
becuuse I am going out to another even
ing party where the guests are not ex-
petted to wear anything of Importance.
Sorry I won't be there to kiss you good
night.”
And then tbe fool man carelessly sent
bls wife’s note to the hostess and the
hostess' note to bis wife.—Clay Center
Times.
“Merearlale Swords.”
When was It usual to insert running
mercury in the baclgi of swords?
This was a comparatively common
practice among the Italian, French and
S;>auish swordmaken of the sixteenth
and seventeenth centuries, but It waa
more of a fancy than anything else, for
it never came Into general use. It was
uot, of course, used for rapiers or the
lighter kind of swords, but for tbe
heavier cutting swords.
The method was to cast the blade
rather broader at the back than usual,
with a hollow running down it. This
was half tilled with quicksilver and
sealed up. The Idea was that when a
blow was struck with such a sword
the quicksilver would fly to the point
and so increase tbe weight of the blow.
This theoretical advantage, however,
did not at all counterbalance the gen
eral clumsiness of the weapon and its
unhandiness in guarding, and so the
tnercuriale swords, as they were called,
from which their ingenious inventor
hoped so much, were rather military
curiosities than practical successes.—
London Answers.
Somethin* tu Be Thankful For.
A Scotchman who lias a keen appre
ciation of the strong characteristics of
his countrymen delights In the story of
a druggist known lx>th for bis thrift
and bis philosophy.
Once b«> was aroused from a deep
sleep by the ringing of his night bell.
He went down to his little shop and
sold a dose of rather nauseous medicine
to a distrozsiHl customer.
"What profit do you make out o'
that?" grumbled his wife.
“A ha'penny,” was the cheerful an
swer.
“And for that bit o' money you'll lie
awake maybe an hour,” she said Impa
tiently.
“Never grumble o'er that, woman.”
was his placid answer. “The dose will
keep liim awake nil night. We must
thank heaven we ha’ the profit and
none o' the pain o' this transaction.”
A Primitive Clock.
A naturalist, while visiting Great
ftanglr, one of those islands of the In
dian ocean known as the Celebes, or
Spice islands, found a curious time re
corder lodged at tbe house of a rajah.
Two bottles were firmly lashed togeth
er and fixed in a wooden frame. A
quantity of black sand ran from one
bottle into the other in just half an
hour, and when the upper bottle was
empty the frame was reversed. Twelve
short sticks, marked with notches from
one to twelve, were hung upon a string.
A hook was placed between the stick
bearing the number of notches corre
sponding to the hour last struck and
the one to be struck next. The sentry
announced the time by striking the
hours on a large gong.
CHOICE MISCELLANY NEW SHORT STORIES FACTS IN FEW LINES
Had )» Time te Pretest.
A Fax***** Si*F*r'« Letters.
“Step up lively!” he commanded to
those outside, says Harry Beardsley tn
Idwlle's Weekly. "Move forward there,
please!" he shouted In a domineering
tone to the herd within. The westerner
braced bluo* If stubbornly to stand
exactly wlwre he was when he ob
served a most surprising thing. To his
astonishment the people about him.
witliout even a protest, were endeavor
ing to pack themselves closer together
with a general movement toward the
front of tbe car. The stranger recalled
*t once how iu hl* western home street
car <*ouductors In gentle tones were
obliged to <* mix aud plead with tbelr
passcngi rs to induce them to make
rooui for others. The western street
car crowd was moved by persuasion,
but these New Yorkers, it s«*emed. per
mitted themselves to be driven.
Aud in this conduct of tbe people* tbe
stranger saw that they bad no time
for stubliornness. no time to spend In
resenting the domln«**ring air of the
conductor, no moments to be lost In
protest or ex|s>stulation. A great com
mon and controlling spirit was appar
ent. It was shown in this very willing
ness to be driven.
Not tbe least entertaining things in
t singer's life are tbe letters »be baa
tent her. lu aeelug and bearing an
irtlst on tbe stage a degree of syinpa
thy ia established that, I suppose,
makes tbe auditor appreciate a evr-
tain kind of acquaintance with tbe
iing«>r. says Zeiie de Lussaii In lie
lie's Weekly. This seems at least to
tocount for mauy letters I get. But
toiuritmee they do eeeui a little person-
41. One gentleman, I remember, wrote:
‘You remind me of a lovely purring
.-at. You ctMue ou tbe stage and never
■ook at tbe gallery.” Another wrote
that be ueltber smoked, chewed nor
irank and that when I came his wsy
ke would show , me about tbe town,
line practical l«>tter I recall, aud tbe
loniplimeut it contained was of tbe
tind that Is always dear to the singer's
heart. I had given tbe man a pleasure
In life by my song*, and be wrote me a
He said he knew
letter of advice,
lingers were a careless, frivolous,
qiendthrift lot of people and that I
aught to save my money. Following
was a list of safe investments that be
recommended, lies ring 3 per cent lnter-
rat. “You have given me some happy
hours that I shall never forget,” he
«aid In conclusion. “Perhaps a* a man
af exiierlence I have given you some
idvlce that will be useful.”
Home of a Priaee.
Very ingenious is the home of tbe
Prince of Agra, in India, which Is a
floating palace of the most stupendous
aud magnificent proportions. Although
of only two stories, its height is im
mense, tlm rooms iteing grand vaulted
chambers, furnished In tbe most gor
geous oriental manner. All tbe chairs
have golden arms, and precious stones
are set In the luteks. The wall decora
tions are beautiful beyond description,
wlnli' the ceilings are tinted to repre
sent the sky, silver stars appearing
here and there on the dark blue back
ground. The palace is made of both
wood and stone, but so constructed that
ft floats with ease. When not in use,
it Is moored to the banks of tbe river
Jumna.
Here the prince and Ills royal retinue
betake themselves on sultry afternoons,
and lazily the palace glides down tbe
river to the soft, sweet music of harps.
Up and down the tide it majestically
floats like a huge white swan, while
within the royal guests sip cooling
beverages and idly dream away tbe
sultry hours.
Frali
"Do you know,” said the man who
lias Just returned from New York,
“that one of the things that Impressed
me the strongest tn tbe big town was
the jiolJcemen? There may be corrup
tion within, but the outside Is certainly
fair to view. Every man of them is as
slick and well combed and brush«*! as
it be kept a valet. Ills buttons shine,
and liis white gloves—they all wear
'em—are immaculate. If there is any
thing in appetirances, these dandy cop-
|M*rs shave every day and look after
the radiance of their shot** with the
zealous ardor of a Pullman porter with
a sliver quarter in view. And It waa a
pleasure to ask them questions. They
svs 'U ks I to take an interest lu setting
you on the right path. Not once did I
receive a curt or surly reply.”— Kansas
t’ity Star.
Speed Is Costly.
They tell great things about the
speed of the ocean greyhounds, but
omit to say that speed costs, as docs
every other luxury. They expect to
drive the Kaiser Wilhelm II. twenty-
four knots an hour, but it will take an
expenditure of 4n,000 horsepower to do
It. whereas 14,000 horsepower will
drive the Cedric, the largest ship in the
world, seventeen knots.
Every additional pound of steam
means more coni, more "bands” and
more exjiense in every direction until
the increase of speed Is soon forbidden
by the increased cost.
An attempt to drive a ship or a man
too fnst soon costs more than either
is worth. Why not take ft easy?
A Ship's Feathered Guests.
The captain in charge of a lightship
situated at the entrance of San Fran
cisco harbor recently reported to the
Co**airaey.
“Squlbob, you are still reporting for United States lighthouse commissioner
tlint a large number of land birds took
tbe Daily Broad, aren't you?”
refuge on board tbe vessel. A dense
"Ye*.”
“Say, lam going to spend the even smoke from northern forest Ares hung
ing with tbe daughter of old Professor over the locality and completely ob
Noett, and he do«*sn't like me a bit. I I scured sea and land. Evidently the
birds had lost their way. and, exhaust
want you to help me through.”
ed by their long Hight, the Wanderers
“Me? What can I do to help you?”
"Call on him in his study about 8 alighted on tbe ship undeterred by the
o’clock and ask him this question: ‘Pro presence of the crew. At one time sixty
fessor. to what do you attribute the of the feathered guests were counted
on various isirts of the ship. Owls,
decay of Darwinism?'”
cranes, humming birds and other non-
"What good will that do?”
"He'll spend the «•ole evening argu marine species were noticed during the
ing to prove that Darwinism Isn’t de time.
caying.”—Chicago Tribune.
It used to puzzle all thinking people
why ponds aud rivers do not freeze l»e-
youd a certain depth. Th is depends on
a most curious fact, namely, that water
Is at its heaviest when it reaches 40 de
grees Fahrenheit—that is, 8 degrees
above freezing point. On a frosty night
as each top layer of water falls to 40 de
grees, it sinks to the bottom; therefore
the whole pond has to drop to 40 de
grees before any of It can freeze. At
last it is all cooled to this point, and ice
begins to form. But ice is a very bad
conductor of heat, therefore it shuts off
tbe freezing air from the big body of
comparatively warm water underneath.
The thicker it gets the more perfectly
Jehiny’a Awfal Predleameat.
does it act as a great coat, and that is
Johnny—I wish my folks would
why even the Arctic ocean never freez
agree upon one thing and not keep me
es beyond a few feet In thickness.
all the time in a worry.
Tommy—What have they been doing
Millions of butterflies are eaten every
now?
year by the Australian aborigines. The
Johnny—Mother won't let me stand
insects congregate in vast quantities on an my head, and dad la all tbe time
the rocks of the Bugong mountains, fussing because I wear my shoes out
and the natives secure them by kindling so fast.—Boston Transcript
Area of damp wood and thus suffocating
Qraassaatleal.
them. Then they are gathered In Isw-
Mr. Kallow —Er—beg pardon. Miss
kets, baked, sifted to remove the wings
Snappe, but can I smoke?
and Anally pressed into cakes.
Miss 8napp*—I'm sure I don't know,
but if you've never tried before please
Bulle'a made of precious stones are
don't l>egin here.—Philadelphia l’ress.
rarities in warefare. But during the
fighting on the Kasmir frontier, when
Beth Side«.
tbe British troops defeated the rebel
Doctor’s Little Girl—Your papa owes
lious Hunsas, the natives used bullets of my papa money.
Lawyer’s Little Girl—That's nothing.
garnet incased in lead. The British
Papa said be was glad to get off with
preserved mauy as curosities.
bis life.—Baltimore American.
The lazy man consoles himself with
Some men start wrong and are late
the shop worn adage about the race not
at every station all through life.—Atch
always lieing to the swift.
ison Globe.
I do not know of any way so sure of
i .**» p «*< 1«.
making others happy as of twiug so
"My coffee is not quite sweet
oneself.
enough.” remarked tbe new boarder.
"Well. If you don’t like it you can
We have never bad as great troubles lump It,” retorted tbe cheerful Idiot,
in the daytime aa we have imagined pushing the loaf sugar his way.—New
York Tim.*.
when lying awake at night.
Qaeer Bookkeepla*.
Mayor’s 8«**retary William P. Ryan
was commenting the other day on the
way In which many illiterate persons
seem to get along in the world. "The
late William J. Carroll used to tell a
good story along this line,” said Mr.
Ryan. "He had business connected
with the collection of rents which used
to take him to a certain place on the
eastern shore at Intervals. On one oc
casion be went Into a store there, the
Cheap I* a B**eh.
The following Is an extract from the
advertisement prosp«*ctus of a large
I’nrlsiau emporium of artificial flowers
near tbe Opera:
Betrothal bouquets from
20
20
Baptismal bouquet* from............. 30
Funeral wreaths from.................... 20
Mortuary cross (large site) from 20
The lot, a bargain, from................ 80
I Marriage bouquet* from..............
francs
francs
francs
francs
francs
francs
”i didn ' t skk thk dot in thk middlb ”
proprietor of which could neither read
nor write. While he was there a man
came in who was evidently a regular
customer.
“‘I owe you some money, don't I?"
lie said to the storekeeper.
“The latter went ,to the door and
turned It around so that tbe hack was
visible.
“ 'That's so,' be repli«*l. ‘You owe me
for a cheese.’
“'A cheese?’ replied the customer.
•No; I don't’
"The storekeeper looked at the door
again.
"'That's so,' be said. ’It's a grind
stone. I didn't see tbe dot in the mid
dle.’ "—Baltimore Sun.
The Police*!**'* Dilemma.
A Loudon newspaper tells this anec
dote: “I-ast evening a strolling police
man was passing tbe barrow of a cos
termonger who was weighing out
plums to a customer. Tbe coster, as
costers do, quickly chucked off tbe top
plum as overweight. The policeman,
as isdicemeu do, took a casual plum as
his perquisite. But the biter was bit,
for bis teeth ground hard upon the
iron simulacrum of a plum. It was
tbe very one tbe coster had thrown
off the Imlance. Now, what could a
policeman do? As a gentleman he
could neither prosecute, for tbe situa
tion was a delicate one, nor steal a
business asset. He took tbe right
course. He returned the Iron plum to
the stall and took a real one.”
Me* Gottis* Searee.
The advantages of tbe modern For
tia are counterbalanced by an equally
large numlier of difficulties that con
front tbe woman lawyer. Mayor Low's
secretary, James B. Reynolds, is still
telling bis friend* a little fling be bad
recently at Miss Rosalie Loew, tbe at
torney for tbe Ix'gal Aid society. Miss
Ixx*w was conducting a bearing before
tbe mayor aud called one morning to
tell Mr. Reynolds she could not attend
the afternoon session.
"I've got to go over to Ludlow street
and get a man out of jail,” sbe said by
way of explanation.
"Ob!” exclaimed Mr. Reynolds In
grave surprise. "Are they really get
ting a* scarce as that?”—New York
Times.
Well adv sed couple*, then, from the
time of tbelr betrothal will do well to
A Javealle Draaiatlat.
take ndvai nee of this opportunity for
Heruiau Herivale, who at ten years
a marring«' to burial economy of a v«ry old wrote a play in which a cook poi
sensible kind.—Ixmdon Expre««.
soned a whole royal family at once,
tells In bls fascinating autobiography,
Mag «'■•kier’s Geaerosltr.
Juat published. of a small niece of bls
A lady on walking up to tbe cash who baa lately embarked on a alnillar
ier's desk hi one of the big drapery es experiment. Here la a scene from the
tabllslnuriits lu Paris the other day to first act aa Mr. Merivale gives It In bi*
pay for her purchases was astounded book:
I to hear that the proprietor of the es-
"King Edward I. and courtier*, dis
1 tablishnient had decided to make her a covered.
"A Courtier--My liege, a geittlemau
present of *verything she ha<! bought
and also a bundle of banknote*. . The await* below.
"King Edward-Ob. tell him to be
' manager hurriedly Intervened, wher *-
npon the cashier t>egan to smash every ----- . I want my lunch.”
Mr. Merivale adds that bl* niece lx
thing within hl* reach. It was found
“very young and rather Furitanlc.”
thnt he had suddenly b«**omi‘ insane.
Twa Doable Rales.
Hl* U**.
British soldier* deposited £30.(MI) last
year lu military savings banks.
Five hundred and thirty two tons of
cigarettes were exported last year from
Egypt.
Great quantities of cheap American
cigarette* are bring amoked by natives
In India.
Lectures on advertising are being
given twice a week in tbe Commercial
tollege at Prague.
Coke, a byproduct In the manufae
ture of gas. has Increased 2uo per cent
lu price lu five year*.
Over 15.000 rabbit* have been trapp. d
during the ]«ast year In tbe tuuulciiuil
rabbit warren at Torquay.
The only way to tell a birdseye maple
tree is to cut It. There are no outward
■igus by which one can judge.
There are 4.338 one room tenements
at Flymouth occupied by famtile* con
slating in some case* of eight persons.
Overworked seamstresses In Berlin
are to tienetlt by a legacy of $250.1**1
left by a German bookseller miuo-d
Bahn.
As tbe hay crop in Lapland has been
a total failure, the peasants are slaugb
tering tbelr cattle, entire carcasses l«e-
Ing sold for as little as $15.
A French statistician estlmntes tbe
numlter of cows in the civilized world
at 63.880,000 and the amount of butter
they yield at 2,(140,000 tons a year.
Six thousand »•artridges, several rl
ties and a number of pompom and fif
teen pounder shells have been dug up
near Klerksdorp. western Transvaal.
First clans briquette* are sold In Ber
lin and Germany generally for $3.17 a
.on, and this I* the highest price known
since they lifeline an article of com
merce.
Five thousand dollars has been paid
for tbe drinking glass used by the late
empress of Austria while taking tbe
waters at Luiigeu-Scbwalluirh, near
Wiesbaden.
Six employees of a Barrow (England)
engineering firm have received prizes
ranging from $5 to $50 for suggestiona
tending to the more economical produe
tion of work.
Recent legislation iu some of the
peach states compels tbe removal of
the pink tarlatan netting which d<x*a
so much to give an attractive color to
tbe green aud unripe fruit and fool the
buyer.
The National museum at Belgrade
has còllie into possession of a collection
of 08.000 Roman copper coins recently
unearthed near a Servian village. Tbe
oldest of them were iu the time of Car
acalla.
Experiment* conducted in California
and recently reported to tbe Botanical
Society of America Indicate that In***
are active agents in the spread of i>eiir
blight at tbe period when tbe trees are
in bloom.
Seventy sepulchral urns containing
old coin ami other relics dating from
tbe Augustan epoch have been discov
ered at Aqullela, tbe ancient Roiuau
tower near Trlest which was destroyed
by Attila.
Treasury figures show deposits iu the
banks and trust concerns of tbe coun
try aggregating $8,500,000,000, or about
$108 per capita. Tbe totul of available
cash iu tbe country is something more
than $2,500.000,000, or less than $30 pet
capita.
Eugllsb firms are trying to secure a
market for soap in India, but up to the
present time that country has remained
practically soapless. Indeed, through
out Hindustan soap is regarded at
rather a curiosity and rarely If evet
kept In stock by tbe native storekeejier.
Hannibal, Mo., has a Tower of Babel,
Fourteen languages are spoken at the
cement plant there, Among the work-
men are Austrians, l’oles, Spaniards,
Italians. Roumanians. Slavs, Greeks,
Hungarians.
Russians,
Frenchmen,
Germans, Irishmen, Chinamen and
Americans.
Germany is gradually dismantling
her old time fortresses. Tbe old fortlfl
cations of Mainz and of Cologne hav«
been torn down, and now it is tbe turn
of Ulm, in whose old tower tbe capitu
lation of 1805 took place. Bart of th«
walls of Metz have disappeared, uml
at Thlonville they are tearing dowt
Vanban’s famous ramparts.
The latest development of »crew pro
pellers Is due to Mr. C. A. Faraone,
The blades are given reduced pitch to
ward tbelr tips, small vanes being alsc
provided on the propeller cone, and th«
effect is to admit of high speed with
out captivation and to give a greatei
mean thrust than Is possible with
blades of constant or increasing pitch.
Dr. Calvello, an Italian, has discov
ered that !• per cent of essence ol
thyme and 18 per cent of essence ol
geranium make au excellent disinfect
ant when freely used for tbe bands ol
medical operators. As these essence,
enter largely Into the composition ol
eau de cologne. It follows that thll
scent la a gessi antiseptic for ordinar;
purposei:.
Outside Stornoway, In tbe Island ol
Lewis, I* a farmer who brings bit
horse and cart into the town of Storno
way on market days. Whenever In
reaches the Inn a quart of beer In
pewter is placed before bi* steed, win
drink* It leisurely without ever spillin,
a single drop, and no amount of per
suasion will ever induce Mr. Horse tt
“have another." a tem|ierate exampl«
which might well lie followed by hit
masters.
Tbe German As moan company, will
the permission of the government, de
signs to Import Chinese laborers t<
work on the plantation* In Samoa, ol
which cocoa la chiefly grown. Th«
company has engaged a former con
tractor of the New Guinea company t<
proceed to southern Chinn and engagi
agricultural lalswer*. The probabili
tie* are that native la I sir will be wbol
ly displace«! by Chinamen. The Ger
man concesslonnalrra find they can go
more work out of Chinamen.
q*lrk Relief.
Mrs. Trubbte*—D«x*tor. can you do
Hook 8o he I* a poet, eh? What I*
Joey—Uncle Joe, what is an optimist
anything for my husband?
bl* particular line?
and a pessimist?
DoctorYVhat la the matter?
Nye—The Market strei-t line prin
Uncle Joe—An optimist. Joey, is a
Mr*. Trubble* Worrying about mon
man who can act happy when he feels cipally. although I occasionally *ee bi*
miserable, and a pessimist is a man verse* In some of tbe other car*.—Phil ey-
Doctor—Ofc, I can relieve him of that
who can act miserable when he feels adelphia R«x-ord.
all right.
happy.—Detroit Free Press.
A CL**«».
The plane they have In the mint are
nearly all money making schemes.
The Mai* Thia*.
"Well.” said Noah as be bunted for
Ted Madge is the loveliest little
"I wish yon had broken the newt a dry spot on tbe top of Ararat, "a lot
more gently.” sighed (be editor
tbe of people came down to the pier to Joab thing you ever saw. Why. that girl Is
office hoy pled tbe flrst page by drop us when we started, but I don’t see worth a million.
More people live to be centenarians
The first shell was nsed In warfare ' ping the form down a flight of stalra. — any of them around to poke fun at our
Ned -But has she got It? New York,
in warm countries than In cold ones.
by th* *ultan uf Gujerat, India, lu 14*U 1 Baltimore Auierk-aa.
Time*
bouie coming "--Life.
Poverty la a grindstone on which
many wits are sharpened. — Chicago
Newa
T m R***b.
i