----------------- _>
POLLY LARKIN |
Tlwre are others who feel the same
Way alsiut this cruel treatment of ani
mals, and they have interested them
selves to the extent that San Francisco
Why Fire Make ( » Blush,
is to have a new and unique organiza
When one stands before a hot Are,
tion in the Animals’ Home Associa
the face becomes red. as v all k now.
tion, ai.d Miss Maud Smith has lieeu
This result is the effect of the a
“ Tis passing strange" how many elected president. They have obtained
of radiated beat on the r
people w ho claim to be tender-hearted permission from the Society for the
trolling the small blood ves
and tilled with compassion for their Prevention of Cruelty to Animals to
Bkln. These tiny vessels ai
dumb friends, the animals, can go ott' occupy a corner of tlie Animals’ Home,
In a state of moderate <
Under exjsisure to heat they relax and summer after summer for weeks and until lately used as the public |siund.
become distended with blood. The months at a time and leave their cats
The association w ill undertake to care
same process, under the mysterious to starve or eke out a miserable exis
connection of the vasomotor nerve sys tence by foraging on their neighls>rs, for sick and abandoned animals, rang
ing from the smallest canary bird to
tern with mental Impressions, produces
who seldom want to Is* Istthered by the biggest Nt. Beruai<1 dog, and to
ordinary blushing. In regard to ex
DoubtleMM they Isiard fora moderate charge family pets
posure to direct beat the reddening of somebody else's pets.
the skin, together with tlie uncomfort have cat» of their own and all they can during their owners’ alisence from
ably warm feeling accompanying it. well feed, so w hen the poor, half-starved town. To raise funds to assist in carry
may be looked upon us one of the use eat comes prowling around it meets ing on their gtssl work the ladies will
ful little “danger signals” with which with a <«>ld reception and is driven give rummage sales and other enter
we are surrounded.
from house to house. The cat that was tainments. It is safe to say that all
Persons who from any cause have once petted and made much of by the
lovers of animals will patronize these
lost their susceptibility, as Is the case niemliers of the family, ami whose coat
entertainments. At its last monthly
In some forms of paralysis, may ex
w as us smooth as velvet, is now a target meeting tlie Animals' Society reported
pose a limb to heat until serious in
for
all the boys in the neighborhood, 207 complaints investigated during tlie
jury results. The reason that the face
chiefly flushes is that, in the ordinary who delight in stoning and setting the month of June, involving 411 animals,
position near a tire, it Is most directly dogs on him. It becomes as wild as a 2'10 of which were relieved; seven cases
exposed to the rays of heat, while March hare, and if it survives, when were prosecuted, with two convictions
most of tin1 body Is shielded by doth the family return home they find poor and two cases pending: li*> remedied
Ing: that the nerves of the face lire I ussy an amaciatcd and woe-tiegone
without prosecution, 129 warnings is
particularly sensitive in this respect cat, possibly recovering from a broken
sued, seven animals removed in the
and that the akin there is more abun leg and many wounds. It is a cruel
ambulance, 111 taken from work, and
dantly furnished with blood vessels.
shame, and Pol y has not much pa flfty-tliree horses killed. This is a good
tience with people who turn their Jiets siiowing for the association, and it has
II uko anti the Harber.
When Victor Hugo lived in Paris. In out to die or pick up any kind of a living. reaped its fruits in a very satisfactory
the Place Royale, he used to tie shaved
way, for it lias made hitherto cruel ami
» » » »
by u barber named Brassier. A friend
relentless owners much more humane
Every
now
and
then
you
llnd
wheie
of the poet asked the barber one day
in the treatment of their animals. They
If he was busy. “1 hardly know which - ime one lias turned out a horse to die.
are mortally afraid of this association,
way to turn.'' was the reply. "We have They have served their masters faith
to dress the hair, of thirty Indies for fully, drawn the heavy loads that and well they may be, for they will
soirees and bulls.” And M. Brassier strained every muscle in their tired show as little mercy to them as tliey
showed the list to his friend. A few bodies, taken the unmerciful lash that have shown to the helpless anima’s
tliey unfortunately own. I.et the gissl
duys after the friend returned and in
left great welts on their backs when
qulred about the thirty Indies. “Ab,
work go on. 1 should like to see such
monsieur,” said tlie burlier sadly, “1 their strength gave completely out and an organization iu every city and town.
was not able to attend half the num tile heavily laden wagon refused to
» * » »
ber, and I have lost many good cus budge and all the other abuse heaped
“
Dorritt
Little,
” transposed, ' Little
towers through M. Victor Hugo.” I t upon him, and now that their days of
appears that the poet when about to usefulness are passed they are be Dorritt”: Your question in the query
be shaved was suddenly inspired and grudged the hay that would keep box arouses my interes' and sympathy.
seized the first piece of paper be could them and are turned adrift to die on You have given up your life for the
find to write n poem. Hugo hastily
the road. 1 have seen these old worn- family since your mother’s death ten
left the shop with his unfinished verses,
years ago. Now that you have a step
on the back of which were the names out horses that were turned out on the mother, would it lie selfish for you to
roadside
come
up
at
nightfall
and
lisik
and addresses of the thirty ladles,
accept the gisid position otl'ered you?
many of whom waited in vain fur their w istfully over the gate at their owners
is they went about feeding the other No; Polly would advise you to accept
coiffeur.
horses, trying in every way to attract it, particularly as you and your step
Billy nice and u Pin.
their attention, and it has seemed to mother are not congenial.
Billy Rice, negro minstrel, used to Folly that their hearts must lie made of
tell the story of a man who picked lip
BRIEF REVIEW.
•cone to turn a deaf ear to the poor,
a pin as be was leaving the office of n
wornout
horse.
“
Verily,
this
Is
a
re
great merchant, after an unsuccessful
First Conquest of the Hermit Kingdom.
ward for long and faithful service," I
quest for work.
Seventeen centuries ago tlie Japanese
The merchant, Beeing the mini's uc bave said to myself over and over again.
tlon from the window, called him buck I hey had better given them a good din Emperor ('Imai was playing a lute in
and gave him employment, which kind ner of grain or turned them into a Held the presence of his wife and Prime Min
ness he repaid by becoming owner of of clover, then when the time came ister. Whether on account ofthemusic
the entire business in an incredibly they could not keep them, send a bul or from some other cause, the Empress
short time.
let swift and sure into some vital spot liecame Inspired wita a divine afliatus
Billy used to end bls
,nd end their suH'erings, Thia would and liegan to utter the thoughts put in
Ing that ( iv tried that
when lie was looking for work,dropping have been tar more kind to Polly’s way to her mind by tlie Deity. “There is a
I md to the west ward,” she exclaimed,
a pin carefully on the floor as lie en of thinking.
“and in that land isaliundanceoi treas
tered. He stated Ills wants to the pro
» » *■ »
prietor, who not only bud no employ
ure, gold and silver, dazzling to look
But with an eye to business the past upon. This land I will now bestow up
meat to offer him, but remarked to his
partner as Rice picked up the pin:
few year», parties having old anil de on you.” The Emperor pushed away
“Say, If that fellow's so small us to crepit horses have sold t hem so ranch
his lute. “If you go up to a high place
steal a pin off the floor, bow much do ers for chicken-feed. More’s the pity
and look toward tlie west,” lie said,
you tbluk he'd leave in my till?''
that such a noble anima) as the horse “there is no land to lie seen, but only
vlmulil have so ignominious an ending. I lie great waters. They are lyingspirits
Origin of Kilts.
It will doubtless surprise many Not long since a gentleman passed in who are talking to you.” Then the
Scotchmen to learn that the kilt as nt the neighborhood of a dozen worn- god was filled with anger, and again he
present worn is only a modern fancy out old horses, all ready for shipment
moved the Empress to prophesy. “You
costume and is not of Scottish origin to a distant town to be slaughtered for
are not fit,” she said, "to rule this em
at all.
chicken-feed. They were hungry and pire. Go the one road.”.
But the
The honor of its invention is duo to
thirsty and had simply gnawed ot! tlie Prime Minister trembled when heheaid
two Englishmen an army tailor who
accompanied General Wade's forces to wood of tlie post they were tied to. these words, and he said to his master,
Scotland in 1710 and Thomas Rawlin "That looks like a horse that once be “I am troubled, my heavenly sovereign,
son, overseer of some iron winks in longed to me and that I sold to a man by this terrible message. Continue 1
Glengarry's country. For more than who owns some of the best racing stock pray, to play the lute.” The Emperor
a century previously, indeed, tlie tar in the State. He won several races.” Chua commenced to play softly; gradu
tan plaid bail been tlie common garb lie called his name and the old horse,
ally the sound died away, ami all was
of the highlanders, but it was all In broken in spirit and body, answered
one piece, wound in folds around the with a whinny and tried to reach bls still. They held a light to his face and
saw that he was dead. But the Em
body, leaving the knees bare.
>ld master. The air reverberated fora press put herself at the head of her fleet,
Prior to the adoption of tlie tartan,
which probaldy took place about tlie few minutes with remarks that were invaded the land of gold and silver with
close of the fifteenth century, the long, not complimentary to the ones whom tier warriors, and soon made the three
loose saffron colored skirt, tlie real he had sold his pet to, and after caress kingdoms of Korea tributary to Japan.
“garb of old Gaul,” was the highland ing the p<s»r fellow for a.few minutes These* things happened, we are told, in
dress,— London Mail.
he hunted up the parties who had pur tlie year 201 A. 1)., and tlie story of the
chased the lot of horses for chicken valiant empress is as familiar to a Jap
MTIIImn Block's Joke.
feed and gave him five dollars for the
On one occasion when William Black, animal, and as he walked of!’ leading anese as is that of Boadicea to ourselves.
the novelist, and liis wife were to sup
tlie horse that could barely stagger
The Water Clock.
with Mary Anderson in her room at
the Lyceum he got access beforehand from starvation and abuse, his eyes
One of the oldest types of clocks in
to the supper room, famous as the were tilled with tears and he condemned the world marks the flight of time in a
meeting place of the old Beefsteak the men bitterly who could be so heart Chicago barber shop. It is run by wa
club, and pasted over the labels of the less. The poor old horse was stabled ter powerand keepsacurate time. There
champagne bottles n paper bearing In and well fed and picked up rapidly, re
is no means of accurately determining
large letters the one word "Poison!” gaining much of his fine appearance in
It happened on this occasion that, un his palmy days, and while he would tlie age of the clock, which excites
amusement and ridicule. Archimedes,
known to Black. Mary Anderson was
never speed his way around a race who was born in Syacuse 287 B. C., is
entertaining a number of guests with
whom she was but slightly acquainted, course again, In- was destined in his old believed to have made the first water
so that the Joke turned out to lie some age to travel leisurely around in the clock; the last, it-is said, was made in
what embarrassing. It must have giv country home of hi old master, being Europe during the year 1360. Some
en the strangers, who knew Black only the tried and faithful driving-horse of where between these two dates the
by repute, something of a shock to dis the family. “When he is too old for clock in Basset’s shop was made. I ts
cover liow very boyish he was under that then he shall die in clover,” says
owner knows little of it or its history.
his cold outward demeanor.
his owner. This gentleman, after he It has been In Ins family over 400 years.
had seen that tlie old race-horse was
His Little Bill.
taken care of, continued his good work.
Mrs. Belinda Beil Adams of Warrens
"The senator from New Jersey re
minds me of one of those ferocious He hunted up tlie proper authorities ville, O., born in 1811, is still living in
Newark mosquitoes." 1 heard her re and told them of tlie starving horses the house to which she went as a bride
mark to a gentleman by tier side witli that had liven tied up for hours with in 1820.
eyeglasses and tliln hair In one of the out food or water. Tlie result was that
The KingofSiam owns an army corps
senate galleries.
five horses were condemned, taken off
“How so?” queried tlie man. pelting and killed and their bodies taken to the of 500 elephants, all well trained for
his ear closer to her and looking as If crematory, and a bale of hay and plenty military purposes and under command
be expected something real brilliant.
of water were given to tlie others. Polly of a general.
“Because he seems to be forever
wishes w ith all her heart that-the world
The man who is suspicious lives in a
pushing Ills little bill."- Yonkers States
were filled with just such noble-hearted constant state of unhappiness. Better
man.
men, who would go out of their way to for Ills peace of mind to lie too trustful
Flgnres Don't Lie.
minister to the wants of dumb animals. than too guarded.
Brown —You only fifty! That’s n
« « « «
good one!
What bright things we all think of
White—My daughter says she Is only
Not long since I saw a beautiful can when the opportunity is past for say
twenty-six, and she was born two
ary flying about in the bushes of a worn ing them.
years after I was married, and I was
au's
yard. Thinking her canary had
married nt twenty-two. Figure It out
An Irishman says he always shuts
escaped, I stepped to her door and told
for yourself. —Boston Transcript.
his
eyes when he lisiks at a lady’s faults.
her aisiut it. “Yes, it is my bird,” she
replied, “but I turned it out on pur
Hrlckn and Mortar.
When a man fools his wife, it is not
Two Irishmen were arguing who was pose. It doesn't sing and I can’t tie
that
he is so smart, but that her faith
the cleverer.
bothered with a bird that does not pay
"Well,” said Pat. "I'll bet you can’t for bis keeping any I letter than that. is so great.
tell me what keeps bricks together.”
The domestic fowl is not mentioned in
He had tried to get into the window
“Shure,” said Mike. “It’s mortar.”
two or three times, but I didn't pay the Old Testament.
“No,” said Pat: “you are wrong; that
any attention to him.” “But he will
keens them anart.”
Italy has fifty factorfea of chemical
starve or freeze to death, < anary birds
fertilizers.
A Fierce Threat.
don’t know bow to take care of them
Irish Maid — Do you want a good selves," I »aid. “I think |s>saliily some
If you have diamonds, he thankful,
beating. Master Jimmy, or do you not. body will take him in and think they but don’t hold them up to the eyes of
because If you don’t behave yourself have got a great prize, and if they don't
poverty in a street car.
tills minute you'll get both?
the cats will catch him before night,”
Titanium Is the hardest metal. It
It is such a mystery
The superior man Is satisfied and she answered
looks like copper, hut will scratch ris k
how
people
can
lie
so
heartless.
I
can
’
t
composed; the mean man is always
crystal.
understand it for a moment.
full of distress.—t’onfueius.
BANDON RECORDER.
t_________________ J.
FOR NERVOUS FOLKS.
Systematic- Heat, .tluxsae aud Frap-
er Diet M ill Work Mender«.
Schule, writing ou uieutal diseases,
asks, "Is our civilization to ilauie for
this neurotic condition?" anl the an
swer is in the affirmative. How can
nutrition prosper in the body where
malnutrition holds full sway? And
how can people be happy and healthy
when worry dominates their lives?
For in this human being the lower offi
cers of the nervous hierarchy draw
their very breath at the bidding of the
higher powers, and the relation is ver
ily reciprocal, for to keep tlie brain
healthy the unconscious nervous func
tions must In* kept In good shape, prop
er activities alternating with wisely
arranged periods of repose.
Just as soon as one notices the ap-
| roach of nervous irritability systemat
ic nerve rest will shorten an attack,
and by rest I mean to have the patient
go to lied and have massage. The
amount of exercise undergone iu a
good seientitle massage is equal to s
walk of two or three miles a day, and
it goes without saying that sucli pas
sive exercise should Increase the appe
tite. mid the food Ingested and enjoyed
will lie digested and assimilated. I use
tlie word "enjoy” deliberately, because
there are some nervous Invalids who
cannot enjoy tlieir food unless tn soli
tude. In addition to the massage I
would recommend salt rubs, which are
very easy to give. Have a saturated
solution of common table salt. Rub
tlie body briskly, especially from the
spine outward toward the sides of the
body and as soon as the skin is well
reddened wasli off with moderately
cool water, and the chances are all In
favor of restful condition. In case per
sons suffer from cold feet at night I
would advise the bathing of the feet in
cold water before going to bed and
having a hot water bag always at
hand.
Lettuce, celery, spinach, onions, are
all vegetables especially valuable to a
person of nervous temperament, and
milk hot or cold is invaluable.—Pil
grim.
SCIENCE SIFTINGS.
The amount of blood In the human
body is one-thirteenth of the body
weight.
Sound moves 1,142 feet per second,
light 192,000 miles a second and elec
tricity 288,000 miles a second.
The rotation of a waterspout at the
surface of tlie sea has been estimated
us 354 miles an hour, or nearly six
miles a minute.
The sun's light is equal to 5,563 wax
candles at one foot from the eye. It
would take 800.000 full moons to equal
cloudless sunshine.
It is probable that the temperature
of the moon's surface at its midday Is
750 degrees F. The drop at night is
probably 1,000 degrees, to 250 degrees
below.
Vesta Is the only one of the smaller
planets which can be seen with the na
ked eye. Its diameter is only 300 miles
mid its whole surface but one-ninth
I but of Europe.
Crystallized nitrogen is one of the
greatest chemical curiosities. By cool
ing nitrogen gas down to 367 degrees
below tlie freezing point and then al
lowing it to expand solid, snowlike
crystals are formed.
A Glffantic Goddexa of War.
In the Japanese capital there is a gi
gantic image of a woman made of
wood, iron and piaster. The time of its
erection and the name of its designer
are In dispute, but It is known to have
been dedicated to Hachiman, the god
of war. In height it measures fifty-
four feet, the head alone, which Is
reached by a winding stairway In the
Interior of the figure, being capable of
holding a company of twenty persons.
The goddess holds a sword in her right
hand and a huge painted wooden ball
in the left. Internally tlie statue is the
finest anatomical model In existence,
every bone, Joint and ligament being
represented on a gigantic scale in pro
portion to the height and general size
of the huge tigure itself. The large
eyes are magnifying glasses, through
which a fine view of the surrounding
country may be had.
t’nlnjorrd Lion« Seldom ( h.r.r.
Like every other animal, the lion
tries to avoid man until wounded, and
it is only in exceptional cases of there
being young ones to guard or from as
tonishment at seeing tlie hunters so
close to them that they charge when
being tracked
They charge with tlie same coughing
roar that a tiger does and come at
great speed close to the ground, not
bounding in the air, as they are repre
sented in pictures. Their ears are
pressed close to tlie head, giving them
tlie comical appearance of being with
out ears.—London Times.
The Moat Exalted.
“I.et me now,” said the chairman of
tlie reception committee, “introduce to
you tlie man who occupies tlie highest
station in our community.”
“Ah, pleased to meet you, sir,” said
the distinguished foreigner. "May 1
ask what your business is?”
“I am the weather observer.”—Chica
go Record-Herald.
Followed Their Motunl lient.
"Those boys were alike as two peas,
and 1 hear they’re much the same
now.”
“What busiuess are they In?"
"One's a hypnotist, and t’other’s a
commercial traveler."—Detroit Free
Press.
Even the Effort Count«.
"I alius try to be a gentleman," said
I'ucle Eben. "Mighty few people suc
ceeds, but de fact dat anybody's mak-
ln’ de effort counts a heap to his cred
it.”- Washington Star.
GREWSOME INDIAN CHARM.
II.
l.o«« led the Iheyea«« Bravoa
to Le»«»
Marpath.
HUMOR OF THE HOUR WASHINGTON LETTER
Had aa Idea.
[Special Correspondence.]
“I have an idea,” suid the young man
who is always having strange ideas,
“as to how one cau tell which party
to a npitrlmoiiial alliance has the
brains, the ability, the force, by the
children.”
“Yes?” commented tlie other quietly.
“Sure. Show me a family where all
the children are boys, and I’ll show you
ii man who is the forceful one—the
brains of the family.”
“Yes?” still quietly.
"Dead certain! I've made a study of
it I've looked up particular families.
If you find all girls, the woman is real-
l.v the bend of tlie family. She is the
one who really manages things, al
though she may be a quiet little wo
man for all that.”
"Yes?” He was really very meek.
“By the way, you're married, 1 be
lieve?”
“Yes.”
"Any children?”
"Two. Both girls.”
“Oh!”
And then the conversation flagged.
The residence portion of the White
Of ail the grewsome things in the
House is closed, and curpenters and
National museum the necklace present
decorators are at work on the Interior
rd several years ago by Captain John
of the historic old building. All tlie
G. Burke of the United States army
furniture lias been removed from the
stands unequaled as a monument to
east room, the blue room and the red
Indian cruelty aud superstition. This
necklace consists first of all of a long
loom and placed in storage. In a few
buckskin cord made by rolling up a
days the greenhouse, located west ot
large strip of skin and sewing it along
the White House conservatory, will be
the border so that thr >ughout Its en
torn down to make way for the build
tire length it will measure something
ing which is to lie used as an office for
over an Inch In circumference, or about
tlie president. This building will be
a third of an Inch In diameter. This
completed as soon as possible, that
cylinder of buckskill Is covered witli
work may begin on the conversion ot
beadwork so that no part of the skin Is
the present offices in the White House
exposed. The beads are sewed on in
into rooms for the use of the presi
rather tasteful patterns, the colors of
which are white and blue. A thin buck
dential household.
skin string Is attached to either end of
The details of the changes in the
this thick, bead Incrusted cord, by
White House have not been definitely
means of which the cylinder Is tied
agreed upon, but the plans have been
about the tieck of the wearer.
outlined by Architect McKim, aud the
Hanging from the underside of this
main features in the alterations have
necklace and running throughout Its
been made public. The basement por
entire length are twelve human fingers
tion of the house, which is now used
and several small flint arrowbeads of
only as a kitchen and laundry, is to
peculiar shape and workmanship at
be utilized. A large reception room
tached by buckskin strings, in the
Time to Cwt Her.
middle of tlie necklace depend three
will be arranged on that floor, and a
“I must quit being seen with that
small medicine bags made of the
suitable entrance to the room will be
Mrs. Flippleigh," she said.
tanned hide or skin of human beings.
"My dear.” her husband answered. provided at the east end ot the build
These bags contain charm stones and
"I'm glad to hear you say that. You ing. This entrance will be covered by
other paraphernalia of the medicine
know she's been divorced twice, and a portico and will be quite pretentious.
man.
really I don't believe her husbands One of the attractive features of the
The human Angers, forming the most
were altogether to blame."
remodeled bouse will be a marble
conspicuous feature of the necklace,
"Oh. it isn't that so ranch, but 1 sus staircase to replace the old stairway
are complete, having been cut off be
pect that she trimmed the shirt waist which uow leads to the offices of tlie
tween the middle Joint and the knuc
and liât she wears herself.”—Chicago
kle. Tliey have been dried In such
president. Tlie uew stairway will ex
maimer as to preserve their natural Record-Hera Id.
tend from the reception room in tlie
color, finger nails, etc., aud look as
J oiim ' Idea.
basement to the second floor.
fresh as though they bad been re
Diplomat« Seek the Seashore.
moved only a few hours.
The Austrian embassador has taken
During General Crook's campaign
a cottage at Bar Harbor, where be has
against the Sioux and Cheyennes In
passed the last three summers aud
1876 the Fourth cavalry and a detach
where be and bis wife are leading
ment of Indian scouts under Colonel R.
members of the Washington colony.
C. Mackenzie surprised and stormed
There will be a large diplomatic con
the chief town and principal strong
tingent at Gloucester, cottages having
hold of the Cheyennes. During or.
been leased by the Peruvian. Argen
rather, after this engagement one of
tine and Bolivian ministers and by
the Indian scouts. Baptiste Pouvier,
Mr. del Viso. The oriental diplomats
better known as Big Bat. entered the
both seek the seashore, the Japanese
lodge of the chief medicine man of the
minister and Mme. Tukahira going to
deserted village, and among other
Cape May and Mr. and Mrs. Wu to At
things that the medicine man bad over
lantic City, of which resort both tlie
looked in his hurried flight from the
minister and bis wife are extremely
town the scout found this curious neck
fond, participating iu all the sports,
lace. Big Bat gave the necklace to
from bathing to daqdng. The rnluis
Colonel Burke, who later turned It over
to a student of Indian religions and su
ter at least seeks a partner at the bo
perstitions. and he In turn presented It
tel hops, Mme. Wu’s tiny feet preclud
to the National museum.
ing such enjoyment.
Subsequently something of the his
The Major'« Btu Bass.
tory of this necklace was learned. The
One of Washington’s noted fishermen
Ungers were those of famous enemies
is Major Dick Sylvester, the superin
Briggs—There goes Jones, the man tendent of police for Washington and
noted for their superior courage and
who
married
tlie
widow
and
six
chil
bravery whom the Cheyennes had
president of the National Association
killed In battle during their various dren.
of Chiefs of Police.
Griggs But what Is he doing with
wars, while the human skin of which
The major went fishlug a few days
the medicine bags were made w s also that enormous quantity of fireworks?
ago and returned with a five pound
Briggs
—
I
guess
he
intends
to
get
rid
taken from the bodies of enem - s slain
black bass, which he sent to the presi
in battle. The necklace Is very old and of the six children.
dent with his compliments.
was looked upon by the Cheyennes as
Two of the major’s friends heard of
.Met III« M'aterloo.
a thing endowed with miraculous pow
tils catch aud asked about it a few
"So
that
basebull
umpire
lias
another
ers. Prior to Its capture by Big Bat it
days later when tliey were fishing Ht
hud belonged to a famous medicine black eye?"
the same place. They met a country
“Yes.”
mun of that tribe, who had never al
boy and said. “Is there good fishing
“How did he get it?”
lowed any white man to lay eyes on It,
up here?”
“
By
not
sticking
to
his
own
business.
and its loss put a very sudden and
“Yep,” replied the boy, "it’s fair.
abrupt end to the Cheyenne war. The He undertook to decide a dispute over Major Dick was up last week fishing.”
Cheyennes tried hurd to get It back, a game of pingpong.”—Washington
“He caught a five pound buss, I un
offering a large sum of money and a Star.
derstand,” observed one of the party,
great many horses for its return, but
"and gave it to the president.”
It Smnilii»» 'Em All Alike.
this was refused, and sluce then the
“I dunno nothin' about bls giviu' it
“
There
’
s
a
couple
o
’
big
coal
soots
on
Cheyennes have remained at peace
to the president,” tlie boy said, "but
your
face,
Weary.
”
with the whites.—Washington Post.
“Don’t mind ’em. They’re th’ badges gran'pap, be caught the fish.”
Social Secretaries Scarce.
of
a great industry, Limpy. I tell you,
Hi« Calvlnlxed Hat.
Wives of the cabinet ministers, who
me
boy,
there's
nothin
’
like
soft
coal
“A generation or two ago,” said a
already are preparing for next winter’s
Boston clergyman, “old Dr. Ellis was for puttin' tli' human family on an social season, report that there is a re
u well known tigure in Boston, being equality.”—Cleveland Plain Dealer.
markable scarcity of young women in
cue of our famous Unitarian ministers,
Washington who are competent to
The Genuine Panama.
a friend of many of the transcen-
serve as social secretaries. In fact,
“Marla, where is my uew panama?”
dentallsts. He used always to wear a
"New? Why, that yellow and bent there are not enough to go half way
white panama bat in summer. The
around, and the cabinet ladies are iu
same hat did him season after season, up hat didn't look like It was new.”
despair because tliey know that tlie
"Well,
where
is
it?"
yet It never seemed to lose any of its
"Why, it looked so old I cut holes iu shortage means a repetition of tlie an
flesh whiteness.
guish and humiliation consequent lipou
“One day a minister of the old per each side and made a bonnet for the
blunders which followed them so re
suasion and very pronounced in his mare.”—Chicago News.
lentlessly all during last season.
orthodoxy asked Dr. Ellis liow lie kept
Didn't Hnrmonl»».
The Boeial secretary is an important
his hat ho white.
"Haven't you read that lovely new personage iu Washington society. To
“‘That is easy,’ said tlie doctor, ’for
novel?” asked the first summer girl.
l»e sure, she Is not much In evidence
it has been Calvinized.'
“No,” replied the other, “the only herself, but her handiwork Is seen ev
“’What?’ said the other minister.
editiou of it I've seen has a horrid yel erywhere. Tlie making out of tlie in
'How do you galvanize a hat?'
“ ‘I said Calvinized,’ replied the Uni low cover that doesn’t accord with any vitation lists, the mailing of accept
of my gowns.”—Philadelphia Press.
ances or declinations and the other
tarian.
routine work connected with tlie social
“ ‘But what do you mean by that?'
Full Information.
season is the small and unimportant
“ ‘Dipped in brimstone,’ said Dr. El
“Does your father rent that house, part of the social secretary's duties.
lis.”—New York Tribune.
young man?”
She is expected to be a walking ency
“No. He owns every bit of it. It's clopedia of information on tlie ins and
Mackerel or Bonita t
been bought and paid for and insured
“Not one person in ten who order and mortgaged and everything.”—Chi outs of Washington society. This in
formation she deals out to her em
Spanish mackerel at the average res engo American.
ployer as necessity requires.
taurant ever gets it,” »aid a Washing
ton market fish dealer. “Spanish mack
erel are a good deal like Mocha coffee
or canvasback duck, because it's very
difficult to get the genuine article and
so easy to fool customers.
“Some of the fashionable restaurants
are not above serving a bonita now and
then when an order comes for Spanish
mackerel, and I know that in the
cheaper restaurants striped bass, bonl-
tas, weakfish and sometimes even the
common mackerel are served for this
delicious dish.”—New York Herald.
Cow» M'orae Than Bull«.
It Is said that the Spanish bullfighter
refuses to face a cow, as being so much
more dangerous. A bull makes a blind
rush at his assailant, and this a little
knowledge and experience will soon en
able an active man to avoid, but a cow
fences with her horns with a skill and
quickness unexpected in such an appar
ently clumsy animal, and a man must
be active indeed who can avoid the re
peated attacks of an angry cow.
The bull, ill a state of nature, tights
to obtain the mastery of the herd and
not to kill, but the cow only to protect
her offspring, and, in her case, there is
no quarter given. It would not be to the
advantage of the herd that tlie bulls
should kill each other In determining
which was the stronger, and therefore
they do not use their horns as lethal
weapons, but it is, on the other hand,
greatly to the advantage of the calves,
and so of the future of the herd, that
all enemies that dare to attack them
should be slain.
XV ho'« a LoliMterf
Knocked In the Head.
Blobbs—Going to take a vacation this
summer?
Slobbs—I’m afraid I won't be able to
afford it. You see. I’m thinking of buy
ing a panama hut.—Philadelphia Rec
ord.
The Preealllnit Erase.
Tlie uew arrival looked at the halo
banded to him and shook his head.
“Haven’t you any of panama straw?"
he asked.—Chicago Post.
Good at a Pinch.
Ethel—Would you consider Percy
Monckton a good catch?
Madge—Certainly, if all the others
got away!—Tuck.
A Fl.h Story.
The wife of a uew congressman Is In-
vnrlably careful In looking after her
perquisites and sometimes makes her
self ridiculous by overreaching. A cer
tain Mrs. M. C.. bearing not long ago
that It was the custom of the fish com
missioner to distribute fish to repre
sentatives In congress if they cared to
have them, telephoned to the commis
sion that she was giving a dinner par
ty the uext day and would be much
obliged if be would send up three large
or six small lobsters. A polite reply
to the effect that the fish commission
was not a market, but that she could
have a dozen goldfish for her aqua
rium if th: would in any way con
tribute to the success of the feast, was
sent In repl.' to this request.
An Electric “Wheel.”
There Is a new form of gambling go
Who taketh from a numskull's lips
ing on In the bouse cloakrooms. For
The surest kind of equine tips
And on the loser plants his chips?
merly the members played greenback
The lobster.
poker for drinks, but since the Instal
lation of six pronged electric fans even
At poker, when the draw's complete,
Who murmurs, with a querying bleat,
matching peonies bus become obsolete.
“How many do four aces beat?”
Each prong of the fan Is numbered,
The lobster.
aud the players each select a number.
The player holding the number that
Who, when a maid, all guileless, gay.
Avers she’s fond of fizz frappe,
falls opposite the upright support of
Replleth, "Creature, hence away?"
the fan “buys" for tlie entire party.
The lobster.
The game is very popular, but tlie
Who every kind of duty hates.
switches controlling the current are
Yet, harassed by the adverse fates,
about worn out by the constant turn
Grinds out bad verse at workhouse rataat
ing ou aud shutting off of the current.
The lobster.
—Town Topics
___ CARL SCHOFIELD.
KmbarnMlnai
A Hnnhnnd'« Epigram.
Wa»blnflon Timber.
A Missouri editor is responsible for
She How many men owe their suc
“Pennsylvania avenue at one time tlie assertion that at a recent church
cess in life to tlieir wives?
had trees down the center, I tielieve,” entertainment iu bis town the master
He—And how many more men owe
T'Be Boston Boy.
was the remark I made to a George wf ceremonies made the announcement
tlieir wives to their auccese In life?—
“Lookin’ fer a bird's nest, sonny?” town man I met in a trolley car.
that "Miss Bates will sing, ‘O That
New York World.
“Yes,” was the gentleman's reply, I Had an Angel's Wings That 1 Might
asked the good natured westerner of
seven-year-old boy whom lie met in “and now yoji can find presidential Rise aud Fly,’ accompanied by the min
timber ou nearly every street in Wash ister."—Chicago Chronicle.
“Mounted on Jet black chargers. witli Boston common.
"No, sir,” replied tlie intellectual ington.”—Yonkers Statesman.
snow leopard skins on their saddles,
they are one of tlie sninrtest troops in prodigy as be continued to gaze up
A (iood Example.
India,” writes a correspondent describ into the tree. “I am merely endeavor
Cereals with eggs or vegetable oil
We notice that many of our ex
ing tin* Imperial Cadet corps, orguuized ing to correctly classify this tree iis a furnish all the food elements necessary changes are giving us credit now. We
In India by Lord Curzon for the sons of botanical product.”—Ohio State Jour to sustain a man iu health, no matter trust their example will be emulated
nathe princes.
Ml.
how laborious his occupation.
by the grocer aud butcher at home.