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About Bandon recorder. (Bandon, Or.) 188?-1910 | View Entire Issue (July 31, 1902)
BANDON RECORDER. I POLLY LARKIN J Nlleneln* the Qoe«tioner«. A French gentleman who bad been with M. de Talleyrand for twenty years accompanied him to the congress at Vienna after Naisileon's exile to Elba. People naturally concluded that thia long intimacy had made him familiar with a number of particulars of the minister's life and bearing also upon the events with which he bad been mixed up. Worried with questions, the friend Invariably replied that be knew nothing, but the questioners would not be satisfied and returned to the charge. “Very well,” dually said Talleyrand's confidant, "I'll tell you a peculiar and altogether unknown fact In connection with M. de Talleyrand. Since Louis XV. he’s the only man who can open a soft boiled egg with one backward stroke of his knife without spilling a drop of the contents of the shell. That's the only peculiarity 1 know in connec tion with him.” Discretion had scored a decisive vic tory. From that moment the questions ceased. Political Fence«. “The political expression ’keeping your fences fixed,’ ” said an old cam paigner, “is due to a remark once made by Senator John Sherman. "It was nt a time when the senator had amassed the most of his fortune. He had a farm near Ills home town, and while preparing to drive out to it one afternoon he wns accosted by a book agent, who labored hard to Bell one of bls tiooks. Mr. Sherman was not In a mood to make any such pur chases, ami be finally silenced the man by saying: '1 can’t afford to buy your book. It takes all my money to keep my fences fixed.’ "lu reality Mr. Sherman referred to the fences on his farm, but some of Ills jHditlcnl associates, hearing of the re mark a few days later, took it up at once nnd made a political phrase of it. It was first confined only to the state of Ohio, Imt it luis now become so common that no one ever takes the trouble to wonder where It originated.” - Philadelphia Times. Military Crime«. Hardship and privations do not Im prove the temper, and Insubordination easily supervenes, while the temptation of drink, if it is to be had, is too often irresistible to weak but well meaning men long deprived of such dissipation. Another fruitful source of transgres sion which, if we are to trust vague re ports, became at times epidemic was the almost natural surrender to phys ical exhaustion, says Major Arthur Grlllitlis in Tlie Fortnightly Review. To sleep on sentry is one of the most serious of military crimes. It is inex cusable from the military point of view, for the safety of thousands may hang upon the vigilance of one man, yet the strain of some wearisome, long protracted march or fatiguing opera lions will sometimes explain what can not be defended. Nor can we shut our eyes to possible |Ullt of a more contemptible, if not molt flagrant, kind. Misbehavior be fore the enemy- cowardice, in plain English Is not absolutely unknown In our or tiny other army. It Is wiser, perhaps, to draw a veil over its exhibi tion ami tlie punishment that must fol low, yet we cannot shut our eyes to the certainty of its occasional occurrence. The Divinity of Justice, Tlie one divine work, tlie one ordered sacrifice, Is to do justice, and it Is the last we are ever Inclined to do. Any thing rather tlinn that; ns much char ity as you choose, but no Justice. “Nay,” you will say, “charity is great er than justice.” Yes, It Is greater; It Is tlie summit of justice; it is the tern pie of which justice Is tile foundation. But you can't have the top Without the bottom; you cannot build upon char ity. You must build upon justice for this main reason—that you have not at first charity to build with. It is the last reward of good work. I)o Justice to your brother—you can do that whether you love him or not and you will come to love him. It Is all very fine to think you can build upon charity to begin with, but you will find all you have got to begin with begins at home and Is essentially love of yourself.—John Rus kin. The ThouKhtfnl Stork. On a tree close to a house, within a abort distance of the river or canal, there was a storks' nest, with young ones. The roof of the house caught tire one day, and, though the fiaines did not actually reach tlie tree, the heat became scorching. So the mother stork tlew down to the water, got Into It and drenched her breast; then, re turning to her young, she spread the mass of cool, wet feathers all over them. Tills she repeated over and over again, dying to the river, going down Into the water and returning, her plum age drenched with wet. And thus the nest wns saved, and tlie tender nes tlings were preserved alive until the fire had been got under and all was safe. The truth of this remarkable story was vouched for by more than one eyewitness. -Cornhill, What Wrrpliiu Vienna. Tears are the result of n nervous storm In the central nervous system, under which there Is such a change in the vascular terminals of the tear se creting glands that the excretion of water from tlie glands Is profuse. Some excretion Is always In progress in or der that the surface of the eye may be laved and cleared of foreign matters which may come In contact with It, but the controlling center Is nt a dis tance. Satl«n**<l. You would be surprised to know how many little girls from 10 to 14 years of age help to earn their living by selling papers on the streets of San Francisco. Some of them are very neatly and warmly clad and their hands protected by gloves, but the majority of them seem to be attired in somebody's odds and ends of cast-off clothing and they are anything but neat. For this there is no excuse, for soap and water are in expensive, but theirenviroiiments have possibly made them careless; then, again, they may never have heard that “cleanliness is next to godliness,” and doubtless it is an unknown quan tity in tiieir homes, where they never see anything but tlie ordinary and note the daily scramble for the very neces saries of life. These little girls vie with the lioys in selling papers, and some of them work up a regular line of custom ers who will not purchase their pa|*ers from anybody else but the wee lassies who are striving to earn their bread on the streets. They are never missing from their posts, rain or shine. The wind nearly takes them oil'their feet at times, but they cling courageously to their stock of pa|>ers that are a load in themselves in such childish arms, and their voices rise above the diu made by the wind and the confused sound of wagons, street ears, etc. “Here’s your morning or evening papers,’’ as the case may be. It makes you feel that you want a well-tilled pocket-liook to meet the demand from this array of little folksand you feel almost blue and sadly out of temper sometimes to think that you must turn a deaf ear to their entreaties. You wonder what influence this kind of life is going to have on the lives of these children who havespeut a great deal of their childhood on the streets battling for the dimes and cents. Some of them have already lost their sweet, innocent look and have become bold, rather too familiar with Tom, Dick and Harry, and have a look of defiance that is not in keeping with their years, old before their time and distrustful of people. They are shrewd and business-like, but to Polly’s mind they have paid a heavy price for their knowledge, for it has robber! them of their sweet,confiding and trustful little ways that make the wee folks lovable. »»»» Children are not the only ones who make their living by selling papers, for there are cripples and elderly people galore selling papers on the street cor ners. One little woman has grown gray in the service. Her husband was at one time fairly well to do, but by un fortunate speculation lost the money he hail earned by dint of hard work and economizing. When be found that all was gone and that he must begin at the foot of the ladder again he lost all ambition, and to make matters worse suffered a stroke of paralysis. Wearily lie dragged himself down town day after day to sell newspapers. Old friends went out of their way to buy a paper from him. He managed to eke out a bare existence for several years and then suffered another stroke of paralysis. From that time on he has been unable to leave the house, and his wife took up the burden. For years she has stood on a street corner, neatly and warmly clad, selling the morning and evening papers. She never asks 5'oti to buy one, but the old customers of her husband and friends they had known in their palmy days never for get to purchase their papers from her. It would lie easier for them and more convenient to have them left at their homes, but they are loyal to their old friends. Her dark hair has become sil vered and her face tanned and brown, imt she always carries the same gentle, quiet, ladylike demeanor that were her chief charms liefore their riches took wings. She has made a fairly good living for herself and crippled husband, who is fretting his life away at home. chiffons, flowers galore and of every de scription, but they are not suitable ex cept for summer resorts and in some of the |s>pular I m «rd I ng houses, etc. You need an entirely new outfit for vaunt ing and roughing it. < >ne of the pret tiest outfits 1 have seen for camping was made of blue and white ticking with short skirts, blouse waist and trimmed with jiearl buttons. The un derskirts were of the same material, a sunbonnet which resembled one of our old-time shakers, was made of the mat ting which comes around tea and trimmed with blue and white zephyr gingham. For a change the young lady had a brown duck suit made in the same way, and very high tan shoes that were laced nearly to tlie knee. These hail double soles and were made to order, and would have lieen a credit to an Alpine climber. »»»» In answer to your quest ion last week, “Jeannette W------ as to the liest place for an outing for yourself and the little ones, where it would l>e convenient for your busband to join you on Saturday evening, 1 would advise you to get tlie little book let called "Vacation for 1902,” issued by the California and North western .Railway Company. It not only gives you the names of places galore, tlie summer resorts, the springs, boarding at beautiful country homes with al) the luxuries you can dream of, hotels and private boarding-houses in the interior towns, but places for camp ing with every convenience and in one of the most beautiful sections of country ilk tlie United States. Tlie picturesque scenery, tlie rippling streams and Rus sian river bowing for miles through rocky canyons beside this favored road. Here you can find just what you want and close enough to give the head of the family a delightful outing every week. BRIEF REVIEW. How Davis Was Trained. Richard Harding Davis, like most successful authors, had his day of grind and uphill effort before he tinallyfound himself in “Van Bibber," “The Prin cess Aline," and all the'rest. He had the usual trials of a man who starts out to do newspaper work, and yet who has distinct literary aspirations. The edi tor who passed on Davis’ reportial copy said that the hardest work lie had was to remove the “literary touch” from Davis’ reports, and hellnally said, “For heaven’s sake, Dick, remember that you are writing for a newspapar and not for Harper’s Magazine.” Not long afterward Davis was writing consider ably for the Harpers, and their editors then had to grapple with the problem of how toget the journalistic idea out of Davis' extraordinally clever literary work. All of which was rather wear ing on the aspiring young author. Women Should Laugh. Laughter is a good, healty, muscle making, lung-developing exercise, and it is as g<Msi for girls as boys. And hu mor can lie cultivated in a girl’s mind without any abatement of the dignity and modesty and charm of her woman hood. Not the unpleasant and con stant frivolity evidenced in "smart” speech or quickness of repartee, but the human that looks at the world with a twinkle in the eye and sees its absurdi ties, its smallnesses and its fun. It should lie part of every woman’s men tal equipment, for women are called upon to bear so many of life’s small worries as well as its greater ones. The bringing up of children, the care of ser vants and tlie many social duties that become a burden, ailare made easy and possible to be put up with by a woman with an unfailing sense of the bright side of life. It isasensethat lasts through life, through its many ills, its disillu- tions, its tribulations, even its tragedies. Forest Protection in Russia. “\V<s>den Russia” is the name famili arly applied to the vast forest areas of Russia in Europe, which cover 464,508, (XX) acres, or 36 per cent of the entire area of the country. Yet some fear is felt that the country may be deforested til rough the earlessness of private own ers, and the Government is considering steps for the protection of the forests. In Rus-ia, houses built of any other material than wood are almost un known outside the cities, and wimm I- constitutes the principal fuel. Ou the same street cornet for years has stood a blind man, who has the most dismal and sepulchral voice Polly lias ever heard. It seems to be in keeping with his looks, and there is a despondent twang to it that fairly makes your blood run cold. On a placard hanging from iiis neck are the words, “I am blind.” You feel that it is your duty to buy one of his papers Maine’s Old-Time Fast Day. when you hear him singing out in his Maine is one of the few States that dismal, rasping voice, “Morning papers, still observe more or less seriously, an daily or weekly.” annual fast day. Governor John F. » » » » Hill, in his proclamation, which is very Then just around the corner is a crip brief, says: “This day, revered by the ple, sadly afflicted, but as cheery as a Fathers, comes to us consecrated by cricket. His voice has a pleasant ring oliservances for many generations. It to it as he calls the papers and the im is appropriate that we should continue portant headlines as he sits in his in to respect a custom so deeply enshrined valid chair. He has a pleasant word in the hearts of the people, and I earn for this one, that one ami the other estly recommend that the day be ob one although much of the time he is server! in a manner consistent with the suffering keenly from rheumatism that purftoseH for which it has been set has rendered his feet useless. When apart.” the day’s work is done some memlier of the family comes and wheels him home It is supreme human folly to get bit to his wife and children who are wait ter in politics. There must be two par ing with a warm welcome for him. He ties. God intended it to lieso. ('an you feels that he is independent ami a help magine fora moment the existence of rather than a care, and he has made up only one great party in the Uniter! his mind to be content and make the States? best of everything in spite of his suffer An enlightened age is robbing funer ing and the affliction that would make many a stronger man sink under the als of their sadness and gloom. God says all things must die. Let us bow to weight of his troubles. his will in calmness and resignation. ««« « Senator Grab- A man culled on me this morning and offered me *1.000 for my vote on a certain measure, but I re fused It. Political Purist—Bravo! You ought to have theapproval of your conscience. Senator Grab—1 have. We finally Everybody is getting ready for the agreed on *2,000.-Boston Post. summer vacation and querying where they shall go, what they shall wear, Accnm mods tins:. etc. The materials for summer dresses “The shovel fish of South America,” are fairly bewitching this season and said Uncle Jerry, “is the most accom modating fish there is. It has a snout are made up so daintily, not only for in the shape of a shovel, and It will the summer girl yet in her teens, but jump out on the bank and dig bait for for al) ages. The style of hats is also in you to catch It with.” — Baltimore keeping with tlie summer attire this American. year ami has run to dainty straws, CHOICE MISCELLANY Steaniahip Growth. For a time the largest vessels with the most powerful engines afloat were the steamship« Paris and New York of the American line and the Teutonic and Majestic of the White Star line, but these were eclipsed by the Cam pania and tlie Lucania. which were not only larger vessels, but had engines of 30,000 horsepower. These vessels are 600 feet long, 65 feet 3 Inches beam and 25 feet mean draft, with a dis placement of ubout 18,000 tons. The maximum horsepower of their twin screw engines is 31,000, which on trial gave a speed of over twenty-three knots. Tlie success of the triple ex pansion engine and the possibility of carrying still higher pressures led to an early introduction of the quadruple expansion engine, where tlie pressures went np to over 200 pounds. The 8t. I.onls and St. Paul have twin screw quadruple expansion engines carrying 210 pounds’ pressure. More recently the steamer Deutschland, with the lar gest engines actually afloat, also has quadruple expansion engines. The Deutschland Is 663 feet long, 67 feet beam, 28.5 feet draft and 23,200 tons displacement.—Engineering Magazine. Wonders of an Acre. Samuel ('leek of Orland lias the most remarkable acre In California. It em braces a barn and corral, covering 7’ by 75 feet; rabbit hunch, 25 by 25 feet; residence and porches, 20 by 30 feet; two windmill towers, 16 by 16 feet; garden, 46 by 04 feet; blackberries, 16 by 90 feet; strawberries, 65 by 90 feet; citrus nursery, 90 by 98 feet, with 2,300 trees budded; one row of dewberries 1(H) feet long, 4 apricot trees, 2 oak trees, 3 peach trees, 6 fig trees, 10 lo cust trees, 30 assorted geraniums, 12 lemon trees seven years old, 1 eighty year-old lime tree, from which he sold 160 dozen limes Inst year; 8 orange trees In bearing. 4 breadfruit trees, 8 pomegranate trees, a patch of bamboos. 3 caIla lilies, 4 prune trees. 3 blue gum trees, t! cypress trees, 4 grapevines, 1 English ivy, 2 honeysuckles, 1 seed bed. 1 violet bed, 1 sage bed, 12 tomato vines and 13 hives of bees. After mak ing a comfortable living for himself and wife off this single acre Mr. C'leek adds *400 a year to his bank account.— Sail Francisco Chronicle. In th* Fallnr*. Shootintf Butterflies. An entomologist In South America tried his utmost, with the aid of the most up to date appliances, to secure some specimens of a beautiful swal- towtal) butterfly, but with no success. The little creature never came low enough. Chancing to meet a native after one of his many futile attempts, lie mentioned the fact The native un dertook to procure several live speci mens for a shilling apiece and on the following day presented himself to the delighted naturalist with six butter flies. It was not till the entomologist was about to leave the district that he disclosed Iiis method. The natives are very skillful In the use of their blow gun. often killing big game with darts blown therefrom. In tills instano the man waited till tlie butterfly had settled, then blew a pel let at it witli sufficient force to stupefy it for tlie time. The capture was easy. Order In ing the cover. The map of the earth has been elaborately engraved oil the outside, and the route taken by the newly wedded pair is Indicated by a line of lapis lazuli, the names of the towns at which a stay was made being insert‘‘d in enamel. Suspended Vltnllty In Ptnnt«. A Germau chemist lias prepared a fluid that has tlie power, when injected into tlie tissues of ii plant near its roots, of anaesthetizing tlie plant. As a result of this injection tlie plant does not die, but stops growing, maintaining Its fresh, green appearance, though Its vitality is apparently suspended. Changes In temperature seem in uo wise to affect tlie foliage, for the plant blooms in tlie open as well as in the most carefully constructed hothouse. Olive Oil. A puzzling question lias been asked frequently and does not appear tv have been answered convincingly. It is this: “Why does olive oil cost so much in tills country?" California tins olive orchards which rival the liest of those In Italy. Spain and France. The de mand In tlie United States for choice olive oil is constant and large. Wliy is it that tlie price Is still so high? Why cannot California furnish all that Is asged for? The Norway Oath. tors, representing not only the United States, but England, France, Turkey, America. “■ •• • Juuuu I'hiua and South - HUMOR OF THE HOUR WASHINGTON LETTER Cause For Hetfret. |3pxcial Correspondence.) “I never was auj- good at a barga**F she exclaimed lu disappointment. “Beeu cheated again?" asked her hus band. “Yes,” she said, “I have, and it’s all the fault of you and the baby too. It cost so much for the doctor last year that I made an arrangement with Dr. Squills to give us whatever attention we needed for a stipulate!) sum, pay able monthly, and there hasn't been a t>lt of sickness in the bouse since. Noth Ing disagrees with the baby anj- more, and as for you—well. If you don’t catch cold or get the grip or sprain your an kle or something you’re a mean, hate ful wretch, ami J won’t believe you love me at all. Just think of paying out all that money for nothing!”—Chicago Post. "Teddy’s Terrors." a strong political club of I.os Angele*. Cal., composed of ’he most prominent busiuess and pro fessional men of that city, have sent to President Roosevelt Hie most unique Invitation to become tlie guest of the club ever received bj' a presldeut. Cali fornia ba* an elaborate way of invit ing president* to visit her cities, but none of them compares with that of tlie organization known as “Teddy’s Ter rors.” The Invitation was not present ed by hand, ns Is customary. It Is so large and so enthusiastic that it had to come by express and waa supplement ed by tlie personal efforts and visit of Senators Perkins and Bard. Tlie invitation is printed on a whole calfskin beautifully prepared for tlie purpose. The printing is of tlie most artistic nnd costly design and is word ed as follows: A Winner, La Montt—Tibbeus Is original. He was afraid to approach the old miser for Ills daughter's hand, so lie wrote a postal. La Moyne—Of course he got turned down ? La Montt—Not at all. Tlie old miser said any one as economical as Tibbeus deserved Ills daughter's band.—Chicago New*. l.os Angeles, Cal., March 30, 1902. We re goln' to have a roundup, and we shore want yer mighty bad. Feed and water plenty. Stocks fat. Brandin’ Iron's ready when yer gets here. Coma on. will yer? TEDDYS TERRORS. To Theodore Roosevelt, tlie President, Washington. The calfskin invitation is Inclosed in a beautifully mounted box made from giant redwood trees of California. The No (’onversntlon. box contains silver and other mount Barber—You're next, sir. Hair cut? Pepprey—Yes, and, here, put this in ings. Tbe invitation is a general one to the your pocket for yourself. Barber—Thank 5'ou, sir. I don't of president to come whenever lie sees tit, ten get my tip before I begin, and I ap at which time there will be a "round preciate— tip.” The members of tlie club wear Pepprey—I don't want j’ou to consid rough rider uniforms. er that a tip, Imt “bush money.”—Phil President Roosevelt is going to Cali adelphia Press. fornia next spriug and will undoubted ly visit Los Angeles. Just before Presi Look In ic For Solace. dent McKlnle.v went to tlie west, more "There's only one comfort to be than a year ago. be received from tlie drawn from a volcanic eruption,” said Knights Templars of San Francisco an tlie optimist. invitation engraved ou a plate of solid "What is that?” gold and containing a diamond setting "It must grind the feelings of the tlie intrinsic value of which was placed coal barons fearfully to see such an at more than *500. enormous consumption of fuel without Speeches In the House. being able to collect a cent.”—Washing Mr. Cowherd of Missouri thinks tlie ton Star. house is growing less Inclined to listen What It Waa. the Home. The French parliament was not al ways famous for the excitement and The Filipino«. turmoils of its debates. In the old The Filipino, whether lie be an edu monarchial days, before the revolution, cated or an uneducated person, is tem the session, of tlie old parliament perate. I <lo not remember to have were exceedingly dull and prosy af seen a single Filipino drunk except my fairs. own coachman, whom 1 had to dis One day, ft is related, a noble count miss. and lie was a very good coach was trying to make a speech, and a man. They drink, n great many of very prosy speech it was, while all the them, but they drink moderately. They other members were either chatting or drink the vino, which they purchase at resting. small simps that are not loafing places Presently the president of the body as our saloons are. but are only shops. rapped slightly with bis baton. I have lived two years in Manila, and “If those gentlemen who are talking there are now. I believe. 450 shops, a to each other," said lie, "would kindly reduction from 2.500. the estimated make no more noise than those gen number in tlie Spanish times. But I tlemen who are snoring, it would be have never seen a vino shop to know much appreciated by those gentlemen It. which is an indication that there is who are trying to listen.” no publicity about It or auy gathering of a crowd in Its neighborhood. The A Ship Under Sall. few American saloons, fifty or sixty A ship under full suil is a truly mag in number In Manila, one can see a nificent spectacle, and there is au ex long distance off. but not so a vino hilaration in tlie wind that sweeps shop.—Governor William II. Taft across tier decks which can be appre Independent ciated only by those who have breathed It. But If you were 'tween decks when Gnlfite* a Queer Eot. she is flying along In such grand style “I remember.” says a brakeman you would hear a creaking and groan quoted by the I’til ladelphhi Record, ing witli every motion. A ship Is built “when I was a boy and one of tlie fel of perpendicular frames and horizon lows would get a new baseball bat tal planking, and as the waves shift liow we would all want to take hold of their pressure the ship “works.” This it, balance it critically, swing it at an wears out Hie calking lu the seams imaginary ball ami give wise opinions first, and later on the frames them as to its merits. Well, these golf play selves begin to weaken. ers are much the same way. only they Spraliiuu by tlie Card. are grown men, and some of them pret Mrs. Trumpem—So your friend Smith ty well along in years too. They gen erally get together up in tlie baggage Is tlie proud father of triplets, is be? Trumpem—Not that 1 know of. Who car. ami such a line of talk you never beard anywhere else outside a lunatic said so? Mrs. Trumpem—Why, you were talk asylum. But when one of them pro duces a new stick it always reminds ing in your sleep last night and said: me of the old days and tlie baseball “Got three of a kind, have you, Smith? bat. Each man takes it in turn, strikes Well, that beats me, old man.” Trumpem—Did I? Well, I wonder an attitude as though there was a golf ball ou the floor of the ear and swings whatever made me dream such a fool at it with all his might. And they are tiling as that?—Chicago News. so very serious about it and so terribly How Eioptlon« Used to Shave. in earnest! 1 tell you, they are a queer It is believed that there even was a lot.” time when every orthodox Egyptian ran the shaving tool over bis face, An Instenlon« Present. A very Ingenious wedding present scalp and eyebrows at least once In ev has been received bj' a French bride ery forty-eight hours. Unlike the Ro- from one of her relatives, who is a tuaus of a later age. the Egyptiaus did geographer. Tlie present is a silver not confine the privilege of shaving to sugar bowl in the design of a terres free citizens, but obliged their slaves trial globe, tlie upper hemisphere form to shave both face and bead. Probably the most curious European oath is administered in Norway. The witness ra ses bis thumb, bls forefinger The less a man lias in his cupboard and his middle finger. These signify tlie 1 rinlty. while the larger of the up or in his head the bigger family he lifted fingers is supposed to represent wants to raise. the soul ol the witness and tlie smaller to Indicate his body. When you are young nail down a good piece of land and don't pull out 1 tie Phillips Brooks House, at Cam the nails. bridge, Mass now has 559 contribu A tmy never amounts to much until he gets over lieing a dude. A Car* “Did you ever notice that, as a rule, the persons who seek death and are rescued from the grave never court the society of the dark angel again?” The propounder of the question was a hospital physician, and he proceeded to explain: “What I mean Is that of all the per sons who attempt suicide and are foil ed but few try self murder a second time. Probably one-half, if not more, of all those who try to kill themselves are frustrated. The percentage of those who leap Into the dark river a second time is exceedingly small. 1 have tried to discover the reason for tills from the lips of those who have gone through the terrible extierience, but I have not met with success. "It is queer that persons, after devot ing weeks and months to a considera tion of so momeutous a question und deciding to end their existence, should, when foiled, declare that they were fools and swear never to do the like again. Yet this Is what Is doue in a large majority of instances. Those who have stared at death seem to live life anew. The past is effaced: u new light seems to have dawned. The sunshine is dearer, the air is purer. It Is the convalescent takiug great drafts of the outdoor air with a keenness of relish that was unknown before.” to speeches. “I recall only one speech this session,” said lie, “that command ed complete silence In tlie chamber. It was tlie speech of Mr. Cushman of Washington. He surely had an atten tive audience. When I first came to congress, such tilings «ere not tlie ex cept ion." "Do you know the speech that held tlie closest attention of the bouse in tlie last congress?" interposed Mr. Brant ley of Georgia. "It was the speech of Brigham II Roberts of Utah, made in bis own defense " Increased Heal E«tule Price«. Mrs. N'uwife—Tom, dear. I bought this lovely cake at a sacrifice. Tom (critically)—H’m! I thought so. It looks like a burnt offering. In nilluua Town. Briggs — Are you acquainted with Bickers? Griggs—Well, not very intimately. 1 never saw him until a week ago. I have already been Introduced to bls liver and kidneys, however, but as yet I haven't heard a word aliout Ills Btoui- ach.—Boston Transcript. A Matrimonial Ke<-oninien<latlon. The laying of tlie cornerstone of the McKinley Memorial Ilall of Govern ment at tlie American university lias directed attention to tlie northwest sec tion of Washington, it was proposed to Bishop Hurst when be purchased tlie grounds for tlie university site that he secure 500 acres iustead of 100, set- ling aside 4t)<> acres to be sold to es tablish an endowment fund for tlie uni versity. it Is evident that had the friends of tbe university foreseen the rapid growth of tlie city In that direc tion this would have been done, as mil lions of dollars could have been real ized had that amount of property been sold at tlie present prices. Tlie university campus was pur chased for *1.200 per acre, and that «’as considered a fair price at that time, but there Is no acreage property now anywhere to be had that is at all desirable In that vicinity for less than from *4,000 to *(>.000 per acre. It may lie remembered that the Barber proper ty of thirty acres was bought for $120,- 000 and sold to tlie cathedral founda tion eighteen months afterward for *240,000, and this is but a sample of many more recent transactions. The Cleveland home was purchased for *30.000. sold to Mr. Newlands for *150,- 000. from whom Colonel Fleming bought two acres. Including tlie old bouse, for *40,000 and lias since refused *75.000 for tlie same piece. Mr. Moody'« Early Canter. Secretary of the Navy Moody enjoys horseback exercise as much as the president There is a difference be tween tlie two men—one likes to ride in the afternoon after lie has completed his day's work, and tbe other believes that u canter In tbe early morning freshens him For tlie toll of tbe day. The president sallies from the White House and mounts Ills horse promptly nt 4 o’clock Mr. Moody rises shortly before 7 o'clock and. with a good horse under him. takes a turn about tbe White House and monument grounds or does a short distance into tbe sub urbs of the city. Mr. Mack—If I find an eligible young man. what shall I tell him about you. A Court Procedure. “No. Mr. Blagstun." the young worn- Miss Amy? Joilae Brewer'« Wit. Miss Amy—Oh. tell him I’m very ac au Bald, “1 respect and esteem you. but Justice Brewer Is not only an erudite complished and agreeable — tell him I can never marry you.” scholar, but lie possesses a prettj- wit, "Was aud Is that your final verdict. you saw me running the lawn mower and now nnd tlien one of his sallies will Miss Baggins?” asked the young law-, —Detroit Free Press. bring a smile to tbe faces even of h'.s jer. pale, but self possessed.—Chicago ’ grave colleagues on the bench. Tbe Her Finance. Tribune. other day In delivering an address at "I heard a terrible noise in the kitch tlie commencement exercises of the en last night, Bridget. 1 hope you (lid Cinnamon ■ « nn Antiseptic. College For the Deaf and Dumb the No living germ of disease can resist not break anything?” Justice remarked that be bad never "Sure. Ol did, mum. Me finance, the tlie antiseptic power of essence of cin spoken to such an audience before, but policeman, wns there, and I wuz aftber namon for more than a few hours, in that when sitting eu tlie bench lie hud destroying microbe* it is not less ef breakiu' the Ingagement.” — Yonkers often wished tliat lawyers were dumb fective than corrosive sublimate. Even Statesman. aud Justices deaf. the scent kills them. A decoction of PlalucMt Man In CoiitfreNN. One In the Dark. cinnamon should be diunk lu locali In the prospective retirement of “ Beware."-said the fortune teller, “ of ties where typhoid fever or cholera Frank Eddy of Minnesota, who leaves a tall, dark man." prevails. “You are trying to black male me!” politics to go Into business, congress faltered tlie fair young maid.—Chicago will lose Its plainest looking as well as wetter Than a Sermon. one of Its cleverest men. Eddy Is tlie Tribune. Mammy — Bless mah heart, if de man who tells of himself that when a chile ain’t cuttiu' his eyetooth! political opponent accused him of being Too Shrewd, Little Rastus (in alarm)—What’s an Old Gentleman - Throw away that two faced lie replied by asking the au eyetooth, ma ui my ? dience to look at bis face and Judge for vile cigar. Mammy — Why, de eyetooth, chile, Tenement Jim — Not much, mister. themselves if he would be apt to use watches ebry word dat yo’ tongue ut- Go an' find yer own butt!—Ohio State tills one if he had two to choose from. tebs. an’ etory time yo’ says a bad word Journal. Doable«. it’ll pain dat good eyetooth so much Mr. Lloyd of Missouri nnd Mr. Prince dat it’ll ache fo’ two lioulis!—Puck. One Exception. of llllnol* frequently are confused be Y’oting Softsmith — Love levels all cause of their Identity. Each has a film Identity. things, they say. handsome flowing niustnehe. a flue mu Philip was saying Ills prayers before Old Grimm—All thing* but the head. sical voice aud easy, gentlemanly ad going to bed nnd ended ills supplica —Puck. dress. CARL SCHOFIELD. tion with, “Amen. Philip Evans!” Hard on the Parson. Comparing Famlllea. "Why. Philip, why did you say that?” The village clergyman went away for Harold—My ancestors were all hon asked Iiis mother. his holiday, and a neighbor took Iiis “Well." he replied. "I didn’t want est, but they were not stylish. God to mix me up with Brother Ed. | “That’s all right. My ancestors were Sunday duties. After the substitute had preached his He does act so dreadfully!”—Boston all stylish, but so far as I can learn they wouldn't pay their debts.”-De- first sermon he remarked to the clerk Transcript In the vestry: troit Free Press. Early Explanntlon. “1 am sorry, John, that I gave you "And she married Jaggers, did she? ( such a short discourse, but the renson A man needs exercise as well a* n Is tliat the dog g<>( into my stmli and Well, well! How on earth did that I schoolboy, but take It moderately. come about?” tore up several leaves of my sermon.” "So far as I can learn. It Is owing to Some of tbe gnarled and knotted fra line* The clerk gazed wistfully upon the a mutual misunderstanding.” — Brook- I of early age are tbe rheumatic bodies speaker and said: of overworked acrobats. — Schoolmas- Ijrn Life. "Ob, sir, do you think yon could spare our parson a pup?” »
