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About Bandon recorder. (Bandon, Or.) 188?-1910 | View Entire Issue (July 24, 1902)
BANDON RECORDER. 1 f prenerviug the old fort, which is one of the greatest attractions in the pretty Sacramento valley. But they have finally lost interest iu a way, and it lias come to pass that the genial old pioneer who has charge of the fort and who is brimful of reminiscences of the days of ’41», etc., sits quietly ill the old fort anxiously waiting for something to arouse interest in the place and furnish the wherewithal to make the necessary repairs. Six months ago the shed blew down sheltering the old stage coach which carried the t'niled States mail and Wei Is-Fargo’s express during those exciting times of the early days and which shows the bullet holes through the stage disir from some robber's trusty ritle, Kinney's name in well discerned letters, and even the old lantern which lias rusted away from the wire which held it to the top of the stage ami lies broken on the door. The old pioneer states that $46 would rebuild the shed ami protect this old landmark of the <lays of auld lang syne, as well as the big prairie schooner which stands lie side It, but the money is not forthcom ing. "Why doesn’t the State make these repairs?” I asked. "Because they didn’t see lit to makethe appropriation for the same,” was the reply. “Why, I could pass ttie hat around and raise that amount on the streets in no time from progressive citizens,” said the old man, “but I can’t leave the fort, and If 1 did I sup|Mise some one would say it's none of my business. But 1 wish some body would do it, for it frets me to see things going to rack and ruin this way.” Ro what Sacramento wants is a Wom an's Improvement Club, made up of the progressive women of the town, who will act and not get discouraged in their good work of well-doing, but keep tlie ball rolling. Hutter’s fort is the Mecca for all travelers and visitors to Sacramento, and it is well worth the trip. The old fort is tilled with many curios, etc., which have been presented by friends and well-wishers, and they are the treasure troves of the old pio neer, who guards them with a jealous eye. Color aud Dlueaue. Every one would agree that color baa |n extraordinary effect on one's spirits, and scarlet or reds of any kind are dis- thictly exhilarating. But wliat is the power of color over disease? The idea that the |>ower exists Is not a new one —Indeed uolssly knows how old it is— but when Edward II. (then Prince Ed ward) was smitten with smallpox bls doctor (Gaildesden) treated him in a way that would batlie even the Chris tian Scientists. To quote his own words, from a note of Miss Strickland's in her Marguerite of France -memoir, “I ordered the prince to be enveloped in scarlet cloth and that his bed and all the furniture of his chamber should be of bright red color, which practice not alone cured him, but prevented Ills being marked.” The old chronicle goes on to say that he “treated the sons of the noblest houses in England on the red system and made good cures in all.” “In this childish state,” Miss Strick land quaintly remarks, “was the noble art of healing at the court of Margue rite.” Wbat would her comments be If she lived in this twentieth century?— Philadelphia Ledger. WASHINGTON LETTER HUMOR OF THE HOUR I CHOICE MISCELLANY (Special < ’orrcHpondence. ] The First X It-llm. Canned Good« In thr Southwest. The southwesterner gets bls living from tin cmis. There surely never was n dream wa> | . ——^—^« such a region for canned vegetables, Impending ea ______ canned meat, canned fruit, canned ■ton the'- i'nd i “I*“ y»u know, Polly, that I have soup, canned milk, canned cheese. Empty tin cans form a charmed circle h olt. Tills la K”"e through this world so far ill any- about every southwestern town ami om-e that lie, thing put a serene and enviable way? camp. Even w here he can profitably i I mil constantly being misunderstood mid easily produce his own food the r and misquoted, and what a tempest 1 southwesterner seems to prefer to raise * lind myself in many times in conse some exclusive crop, sell his product quence. For instance, I am a bundle aud buy canned goods. It Is amusing I i of nerves and consequently easily Hur enough to discover that the cattle rancher, though a thousand cows come ried and distressod, and I cross bridges up to water at his tanks every day or I belore I get to them to the no small an two. will yet serve condensed milk noyance of my elf aud others as well. from cans that came from New Jersey; : If anyone is sick in the house I worry that his beef bears the mark of Kansas myself nearly to death, imagining all City; Hint even Ills poultry and eggs ■ sorts of dire results. Sometimes I even ire imported at enormous prices from go so far as to wonder how the children Kansas. His butter also comes canned. would look in black, and actually shed If it were not for the patient Chinese tears as I picture to myself the sorrow gardener, even the best irrigated val ful little folks arrayed in somlier black leys would be wit limit fresll vegeta bles. But if tlie southwesterner falls in as if there was not time for the wee garden making he does delight III flow ones to face the dark side of life without ers, vines and shnde trees. They re drawing on my imagination to bring lieve the monotony of the gray desert this direcalamity upon them. I try to ami link him with his old green home minister to the invalid gently and Coronation Blonder«. In the east. He will let his fields go soothingly, but all of a sudden my There were all sorts of blunders made thirsty in time of drought before he nerves get the better of me, and I am at Queen Victoria’s coronation, and the A LcMH'in In H<»rt ¡call u re. will allow tlie rosebushes and the pep queen never knew what she was to do informed that I am so impatient that I Four-.vear-old Nellie was with her fa per trees in his front yard to suffer. next. They made her leave her chair hud better get out of the room, that 1 ther one day while lie was hoeing po Indeed so industrious 1ms he been In and enter St. Edward's chapel before surrounding himself with shade und taloes. make the patient worse. Then nine the prayer was concluded, uiin-h to the Talked Ten Dollar«* Worth. There were turnips on the other side verdure that he Is open to criticism for times out of ten the invalid informs me discomfiture of the archbishop. “1 remember when Judge Austin was ’ when 1 am really straining every nerve of the garden, which, of course, never overdoing the matter, overcrowding his The ruby coronation ring, according trying a ease in the criminal court," needed any hoeing, and Nellie very small grounds. An irrigated valley ! to be pleasant and useful, that she will to the rubric, should go on the fourth said 11 Milwaukee lawyer, “that lie had town In blossom Is a marvel long to be earnestly asked: ‘never trouble me again.’ There is no finger. In this ease the ring had been remembered.—Ray Stanward Baker In a fellow to defend who was evidently "Papa, how do the turnips grow?” made for the little finger, which the guilty. When the time came lor him ( use -aying that it is only a pleasure to “God makes them grow, my child,” May Century. queen accordingly held out when the to plead, he rose and said he was will do for them and my only anxiety is he answered. proper time came. The archbishop re Pnlnt and Soap Mine«. ing to let the case go to tin- Jury at tlmt I cannot do all I would like to do "Well, that's funny," said Nellie. "1 fused to put it on that finger and said A natural soap mine and a paint mine once, behoving that then- was no i and be as soothing about it as Mrs. never saw him In here hoeing them.”— it must go on the fourth. Tlie queen are two of tlie latest mineral discov Witl'li'« Mansion anti Block. chance for acquittal. Little Chronicle. Easybody living on the next street, » remonstrated, declaring that she could eries in northwest Canada. Several Thomas F. Walsh, the Colorado mil “He was nmlged by the defendant, • who never gets flurried at anything not get it on. but the archbishop insist lionaire, who has made bis home in soda lakes have been found iu the foot who said. ’For the Lord's sake, say and who would never be startled out of ed that it had to go. Accordingly tlie Washington for the last four years, is hills near Ashcroft, B. C. Tlieir bot something.’ the even tenor of her way if she heard other rings were taken off, and the building a mansion In the west end toms and shores are incrustetl with a "‘You know you are guilty, and you that the whole family iiad met with dis uow one was forced on with such pain which will be the most expensive, if natural washing compound containing didn't pay me much anyway.’ whisper that as soon as the ceremony was over not the finest, in town. It is at the cor aster, but would sigh with that martyr borax and soda. No two analyses agree ed the lawyer. the queen had to bathe her finger In ice ner of Massachusetts avenue and exactly as to the composition of the "'I know that.' said the prisoner. ‘I like look of hers, ‘Tliy will be done.’ water to get It off -Saturday Evening Twenty-first street, near the homes of material. A New York analysis gives only paid you $11». and for goodness’ 1 w as not cast in that perfect mold, and Post. 26 per cent borax, while a Montreal Mrs. Townsend and Mrs. Westing sake talk .$1'» worth anyway.' can no more help working myself up chemist from tlie same sample gives house, and will have a frontage of “Every one In the room beard that, into a fidget over trities than she can Small FI n I i , 16 per cent borax. Tests prove the eighty feet and a length of ninety-five and Judge Austin talked Ills $11» worth. help being as cool as a cucumber under An Englishman walking through a substance to be equal to tlie washing feet. The frame will be entirely of He cleared his man too."—Chicago ’ all circumstances. I crept quietly out certain part of Scotland with rod and powders in common use. Trials by »»»» steel ami the materials for the walls Chronicle. reel came upon a tiny loch which lie of tin- sick room, crestfallen and weary, blacksmiths and farm workmen show Will answer your query, "Jeannette thought held out promise of good sport. brick and granite, making the house \ Dazed Porter. for I am consciousof having tried to do tlmt it will remove grease and dirt bet fireproof. W ------ next week. Patiently lie fished for three hours, Scene—Pullman car entering 8t. my best and failed y-.-s, failed utterly. ter than soap. A syndicate of British On tlie first floor will be a large hall moving steadily from spot to spot along Louis. Porter obsequiously whisk I hear that cry of tlie invalid coming Columbia men lias been formed to put containing a balcony for musicians, the borders of the little pond, but no brooming woman passenger, After (he product on the market. About 275 BRIEF REVIEW. to me o’er and o’er,‘I will never trouble drawing, reception and dining rooms, a success came to kiln. lingering expectantly lie receives a tip ) tons of the compound have been cut library and a conservatory. The second At last he accosted a boy who liad —a five cent nickel, lie looks at it you any more.’ 1 hear it in the still ami taken out of the lake. It Is ban- Fog Lights in London. and third floors will be devoted to the watches of tlie night, I hear it as dawn stood for ten minutes watching him critically, then drops It into the cus tiled precisely as ice is handled. The Apparently the resources of science with mingled surprise and curiosity on living rooms for the family and their pidor, remarking defiantly, “Ali’in er streaks tlie retiring liiglit with waves of blocks are more than nine inches in guests. A large ballroom and a supper portali frum Chicago!” “Open this i light. 1 have not slept. How could I, are unequal to the dispersal, much less his face. “My little lad,” said the Eng thickness, are sawed Into pieces of fif room will occupy the top floor, and in window!” commands the woman. He ■ when with that plaintive voice ringing the prevention of fog, and the question lishman. “can you tell me whether teen ami eighteen inches and weigli fif the basement, besides the kitchen and obeys, whereupon she stoops, picks up 1 in my ears, ‘1'11 not trouble you any arises of furnishing some means of illu there are an.v ilsli in this pond?" ty pounds each. other offices, a billiard room and wine Cholly—Yaas. Miss Cutter, that girl “If there be ony. they must be vera the cuspidor and empties it upon the more.’ I have had that insinuation in mination which will prevent accidents closet have been provided for. The once made a fool of me. track; then, drawing herself up haugh its different variations mill I am heart and confusion whenever the metropolis wee ones, sir.” returned the boy, “fol How She Stop« a Cur. house will cost In the neighborhood of Miss Cutter—Oil, is that the way it there was nae water here until it rain tily, observes, “I am a lady from Bos “Did yon ever notice,” said the man $500,000, and more than a year will be hnppened? sick. My place is witli them, but a is within the grip of a London “partic- ed yesterday!" ton.” who bad observed tilings in general lar,” says the London Telegraph. With required to build and decorate It. When In the station every pas---nger stranger inii-t minister to them, because until it had become chronic, "how the The Colorado building office structure, 1 nnfrnitl. this intention the Westminster City my anxiety makes me nervous. I grow A Un«lii<-sM Mau*« Nerve. .had left tlie car the porter said to the different classes of women attract the also to be erected by Mr. Walsh at the “Colonel,” said tlie fair grass widow, The successful merchant nowadays conductor: “I.os’ dat nickel, en' Ah’ni morbid and distrustful, and the very Council has provided a number of fog attention of street ear conductors when northeast corner of Fourteenth and G “supposing you and 1 were cast away er fool. It tenches me er le--<m. how- ones who should understand my mo lights, of great power, which are kept knows how to turn even misfortune streets, the Foundry church site, will upon a lonely island, would you be they wish to get off the ear and tlie A team of coach somdever, never ter fool wid none o' tives say, ‘How ill-tempered and at a ready for use day and night, and are into advertising. conductor lias his back turned? be the largest building of the sort in happy?” dese Yankee women. Why. der ain’t time like tins, too, when every one stored for the present in St. Martin’s horses dashed into an immense plate “A young woman who lias not been Washington. Mr. Walsh has Just se "Yes, ” he answered, dodging around er woman through de whole west should exert themselves to be cheerful.’ lane. The apparatus consist- of a round glass window in front of n big furni city bred ami who is retiring in dispo lected the design and the plans. the rubber tree. “ I wouldn ’ t ever need who'll er thought o' castin' dat nickel 1’liis is only one instance,¿Polly. 1 am tank, twenty-four inches high and ture store iti New York city and made sition will liile two blocks out of her An Kxpennlve Antique. to be afraid when we went out stroll a general smasliup of everything in on de roadside when dey knowed All way liefore she will consent to attract eighteen inches in diameter, charged misunderstood by nearly everybody, Because there Is no record of a mon Ing together there of meeting a preach sight. The proprietor, instead of shut wanted it.”—New York Press. attention to herself by creating a dis and they attribute a wrong motive to with twenty-live gallons of petroleum. ting up sliop even temporarily, sat ey order for $15 issued seventy-tliree er or a justice of the peace looking for turbance. She will simply wait until Man and III m Skin. everything I do. They never endeavor By means of compressed air the oil vapor down and with a paint brush elaborat years ago a big force of clerks in the a ‘job.’ "—Chicago Record-Herald. the eomluctor looks around. Another Keep the pores of the skin open and to see tlie good side of anything. The is forced from the tank into a vertical ed tlie following on a tdg white board postoffice department has been put to woman, more self reliant, would calm hl good condition by frequent bathing. mistakes crop up thicker than butter standard pipe or shaft, attached to and installed It in the window where work trying to trace it. It Is estimated Judgment Proof. ly ring tlie bell and step off. that it will cost the government $500 in Mau sheds Ins skin Just ns thoroughly Ascum—I confess I was surprised to the plate glass was: "A coach team which is a burner By means of a lit “Then there is the clinging vine type cups in May, tlie good motives are salaries for clerks who are going over hear of your marriage; thought you ns some of the lower orders of crea of woman, who always appeals to the scarcerthan orchids. ‘'Tis a pity and tle naphtha, benzine or paraffine, with smashed Ibis window. You see, even the records in an effort to find some tlon, but he does it more slowly and were a confirmed old bachelor. which the burner is saturated, the tin* horses know where to find good man sitting nearest her. The matron thing concerning this order. Oldbache— But I’m in business for imperceptibly. The cells which com pity 'tis, ’tis true.’ Makes me some who has self possession will invariably means of igniting the vapor are ob furniture. Thia Is a pointer for you.” times wish my little bark had been Representative Landis of Indiana pre myself now. pose the lower strata of the epidermis speak loud enough for the conductor to sented the order to Post master General Ascum—Well? are perpetually renewed and push lip wrecked the tirst year of my voyage tained, and forthwith we have a pow flow llie Native« Trent Gorilla«. hear mid yet retain her dignity. Tlie erful torch with a dare ranging from Oldbache—Well, I had to have a wife ward, and the outer layer must lie con through life.” Natives jn the countries inhabited by Payne for payment. It had been sent masculine woman will whistle.”—New to him by ii constituent who had been eighteen inches to two feet high, and a In whose name 1 could put my proper stantly removed. This process, which « « « « great apes regard them always as hu York Herald. Is termed desquamation, is absolutely power equal to upward of 1000candles. man beings of inferior types, and it is unable to get it cashed. The order was ty.—Philadelphia Press. My friend is not the only one who requisite to the health mid beauty of Whenever the necessity arises the fog for this reason that for a long time it Issued by Asa Baker, postmaster at Antl-Chlne«e Cunuda. has is-en unfortunate enough to possess I'rnper Cnntlon. tlie skin. The more rapidly this __ t proc men call at the depot in St. Martin’s was found impossible to get hold of nil Mooresville. Ind., in April, 1829. It is The latest Canadian order in council ess is carried on the more clear and such an unenviable frame of mind that lane, procure the lights and wheel the entire gorilla skin because tlie savages made payable to Robert Martin and is Courteous Cityman —May I take you Is to forbid Japanese and Chinese cut for $15. Martin has been dead some In to dinner, madam. transparent becomes the epidermis and she cannot I m - appreciated. There are ting shingle bolts or logs from the same to an ap)s>inted station. Each at considered it religiously necessary to years. His heirs In looking over Ills pa Cynthia Jaytown (who is visiting her crown lands. This means that hun the more roseate and velvety the skin hosts of olhers who go til rough life try cut off the bands and feet of the ani tendant has been trained in the use of tissues which are constantly forming ing vainly to be g<s»d and true and mals when they killed them, just as pers discovered the order. It was in city cousin)—Well. I dmino ns 1 orter. dreds of Japanese will be driven into below. I- avepleasant impressions liehind them, the machine, which is reported to have they do with their enemies, possibly good condition. Tlie books kept by Mar The very last thing SI Jaytown says to tlie I'nited States, as they were almost but they will never lie understood or stood the test of a practical exjteriinent for the purpose of rendering them tin showed that lie had never received uie wuz, “Cynthy, don’t yew git taken exclusively employed. Tlie laws are Copper In Cliprae. In while yew be in the city!”—Chicago also being passed against Chinese, and, made in London during a recent heavy harmless in case they should by any the amount. The green color of certain kinds of appreciated here; when it is too late, fog. The heirs presented the order nt the News. chance come to life again. although they are arriving by hundreds however, to speak the encouraging Italian cheese is due to the milk Inn Westfield (Ind.I postoffiee and demand on every ship and the Cauadiun gov The Difference. Ing been kept standing in copper ves words w hich would have been balm to First Railroad Charter. Took It Literally. ed tlieir money. Tlie postmaster there She—Why, I thought the sermon re ernment gets $100 a head, the China Seis. During this period of repose the then aching hearts and when death A gentleman, wishing some bushes found that tlie postoffiee at Mooresville The first charter ever granted in this markably short. I’m surprised that you men find that nearly all avenues are milk takes up considerable quantities has placed the seal of silence on their blocked in tlie way of making a living country, or probabaly any other, for removed from his garden, told his gar bad long ago been abolished He said should consider it long. of copper. Indeed it is customary to lips, then the tide of memory will roll dener to pull them up by the roots. he could do nothing, and the heirs sent iu Canada, so they walk into tlie Unit- the building of a railroad, was granted He — But I wasn't wearing a new bon estimate the degree of acidity attained back and fortunately death can open Some time after lie went into tlie gar the ancient order to Representative in 1K19 to Henry Drinker by the Penn den and found tlie gardener digging Landis. net to church for the first time with a eil States, Canada getting tlie tax and by the luilk by noting the gradual dis up the secret knowledge of many good consciousness that all th»' other women Washington state getting the China sylvania Legislature for a road of that I reaches round the buslies. appearance of the brightness of the V«ed to a President*« Desk. men. The Inadequate United States deeds well done, and you can sing their highly polished metallic surface. Dr. kind from the Delaware valley to the “Why, George.” he said, “you need Jimmie Garfield, as the people of were looking at It.—Philadelphia Press immigration staff' cannot prevent tlie praises then, but it is too late for the Mariani examined twenty live stimph s headwaters of the Lehigh river, over not dig round those small bushes in Washington insist on calling the son of Chinamen from crossing tlie line, while of green parniesan cheese from vari one w ho has suffered in silence at the the route now occupied by the Dela that way. I am sure you are strong the murdered president, although be is A« For Hi M, white men who smuggle them over are oils places and has found that to about harsh judgment pronounced U|»on “ I see here in the paper." observed enough to pull them up by tlie roots. ” uow a man with a tinge of gray in his ware, Lackawania and Western Rail getting rich at $100 a head. every two pounds of cheese there is them. Even a de. izen of the Flowery Sandy Pikes, "that n noted scientist "Oh. yes, sir,” replied the gardener. hair, was being initiated Into Ills duties road from the Water (lap to Scranton. present from .8 to 3.3 grains of copper. Kingdom can be remiss in such in “I am strong enough, but I must dig a ns civil service commissioner by Presi says that the constant use of water as Pall Towellierl That was liefore the days of steam and -Health. little before 1 can cutch hold of the dent Proctor and William Dudley a beverage insures a long life." stances. A Chinaman who was de England alone has twice as many the “wagons” that were to be run on roots. If you had told me to pull them “ As for me, ” comments Whiskered fending Ins friend, another mongolian, Foulke, his colleagues on the commis cotton spindles ns there are In this Inherent Drend of Cnta For Doun. the road were to be moved by horse up by the branches, I could have re sion. He bad Just been shown bis room, Willie, “give me a short life mid a mer- country, but tills will assuredly be The instinctive fear which eats have for some crime, saiil when the party power. That old charter and all of the moved them.” the same one in which Mr. Rodenberg ly one.”—Baltimore American. changed in tlie long run. and tlie spin of dogs Is illustrated very amusingly had thoroughly convinced him that rights it conveyed were purclirsed by of Illinois bad worked, and Mr. Foulke ning of tlie American crop will be done by stroking a dog and then caressing a the man was guilty, "You know his Ortwin of Dunning. said impressively, “Mr. Garfield, you1 the original Delaware and Lackawanna Willie*« Trouble. at home. Tlie crop, however, Increases blind and newborn kitten with the face look nice to look on. 1 no see his During tlie reign of Henry VTI1. there “ What's the trouble. Willie? ” said will have the honor of sitting at the faster than the home spindles, ami It same hand that has touched the dog. heart, all black and ugly. All the time Company for $1000. lived In Lincoln, England, a famous same desk which President Roosevelt Mrs. Brown to her small son. who was will be years before we can drive out At once the kitten will spit mid fluff I think him very good man. He go bailiff named Joe Dun. Joseph was used when he was a member of this crying. Male Tastes in Beauty. of tliis or tliat market tlie goods of for Itself up In the most absurd way, dis- now.” A nil he was true to his word. very clever in the management of his commission.” “My kite won't fly,” sobbed Willie, eign spinners. Tlie task calls for the Maidens who have passed their thir tlnguishlng the smell of the I business and so dextrous In annoying Out the Chinaman went next day from Mr. Garfield did not seem much im ‘and I made it out of fly paper too.”— best efforts of New England as well which experience for thousands of gen tieth year may now claim that they those who refused tlie payment of an pressed. “I am used to Bitting at a Little Chronicle. his celestial alxxle. The trouble is peo as of southern manufacturers. Ameri erations has taught it most to dr, ad. rt present the most |>erfeet and advanced account with which he hail been In desk that lias been used by a president ple do not see tin- motives of our hearts, can mills should pull together. The tyjie of maidenhood, and look down trusted that ’io set Dun on him" or of the United States.” be said. “1 use Good Work. and, strange to say, they find it easier south Is content to spin and to weave Sleep! iik In Jnpnn. u | miii girls who marry liefore 25 as very "to Dun him” became common advice my father's desk at home, so I think I I saw a splendid cut of Cadlelgh yes tlie coarser goods, and New England to ascribe wrong motives rather than The Japanese never sleep a much akin to savages, for it is a well- to the owner of a bad debt. To this shall be able to work all right at this terday.” lias a wide field in the making of the head to the north. This is b> the good to their unfortunate friends. “I didn't see it. What paper was it finer forms into which cotton Is put known fact that the age of marriage personage we owe what to not a few one." dead in Japan are always buri It would not he pleasant to see our Tableland and No Peak«. In?” advances with civilization. Every people is the most disagreeable word nowadays.—Birmingham Age-Hera Id. the head in that position. In selves as others see us, Bobby Burns to In tlie language. A citizen from New Mexico came to "None; it was on the street, ^jiss where the most mature woman is to the rooms of many of Hit private the contrary. town, and Delegate Rodey took him up Kanilor did It.”—Philadelphia Press. A Itemarknblr Ca«e. fore. The tastes of men in this regard and of hotels a diagram of tin The Old Mn-i's lla«r. to see congress at work. The New Mex » » » » A remarkable instance of the loss and of the compass is posted upon t seem to base undergone a complete "My father Is real rude to the young ican sat in a gallery for two hours and Getllna Ruck at IIIm. recovery of speech is recorded in Glas Ing for the convenience of guest Tlie women of Woodland have fol revolution, and, instead of fluttering men who call on me." confided Miss then met Rodey In one of the corridors. St. Peter-Who are you? gow. says a London paper. A police lowed their sisters of other wide-awake about he inexjierienceti girl, talking Keedlck to Miss Tenspot. “1 don't sup “1 ain’t tbinkln* much of this yere New Arrival-I’m the paying teller constable was arrested on a series of In Order of Importance. interior cities by organizing nil im pretty nothings, they are matching pose your papa tries to drive young eutflt," said the New Mexican. of- charges of theft from warehouses, and. » keeps an Immense establish- provement club to <-o-o|>erate in city theirex|ieriences, broadening their hori men away.” St Peter-You'11 have to get some ns n result of the shock caused by bis "Why not?" asked Rodey. "My papa Isn't rude. Imt lie's real "There don;t seem to be no statesman body to Identify you.—Town Topics. improvement and general development zon, sharpening their wits in clever con apprehension, he lost ills power of work, says one of tin- big daily papers versation with some brilliant and ls*au- mean to the yo' tig men,” confessed in the bunch." speech. He was found not guilty of the Miss Tenspot. “lie liorrowa money of “ Ob." said Rodey, "probably there A Literal Interpretation. of the coast. Following this comes the tiful woman. charge laid against him, but. being them."—Detroit Free Press. are lio Daniel Websters here, but it is a "Why do we say, ‘Give us this day dumb, was unable to resume ills duties interesting fact tiiat the Benicia Im- mighty good lot of men of tine ability.” our dally bread?' ” asked a Sunday as a policeman, and a gratuity of £6.” The productiveness of Formosa is so All vice. provement Club has requested the la "So 1 was thlnkln’.” said the New school teacher after the lesson. was given him. After tlie lapse of sev "Wliat would you say,” began the dies of that city to form an auxiliary to great that it Is lielieved that the pres Mexican; “all tableland and no peaks.” “Because we want it fresh." answer eral weeks his power of speech has re voluble prophet of woe. “ if I were to Grat It rule. assist in the work. This speaks well ent population of 2,500,000 could lie CARL SCHOFIELD. ed a little girl.—Little Chronicle. turned to him. tell you that in a very short space of Gratitude Is the fairest for the efforts of the ladies, for gradu raised to 10,000,000 without exhausting time all the rivers of this country springs from the soul, mid ally the different cities and towns are the fertility of the soil. Four Kind« of Pupil«. When the ftotl Wnn Not Spni'eil. would dry up?" Worldly Wladom. man ktioweth none so fra falling into line ami following the ex The Talmud says there are four kinds The change of thought and condi “ 1 would say, ” replied tlie patient “ Now that my engagement to Edgar its opponent. Ingratitude, When you find yourself hatinga man liian, “'Go thou ami do likewise.’ ample of the Ladies’ Improvement if pupils—the sponge ami the funnel, Is broken off I wonder If lie'll nsk me tions of mankind Is no better Ulus weed, not only |M>ison<>ns the strainer nn<l the sieve. The sponge to return the jewels that he gave me.” trated than by the history of the rod. Club of Petaluma who started the ball as much after a meal as you did l>efore, Boston Christian Itegister. Impregnating the very nt Is he who tnketli up everything, and to rolling and who have accomplished it is time to call a halt. "If lie doesn’t ask for them. I'd send In an article on tlie morals of tlie which it grows with fetid i the funnel Is he who taketli In nt tills them back nt once, for in that case child by Dr. Grace Peckham Murray 4 flander« .. ..... lent in their pretty city in the way To say that every man has his price ear ami letteth out at that; the strainer they’re not genuine!”—Fliegende Blat there Is mention made of a Suablan Fish are sold alive in Japan, the |>td- of beautifying it. Now Polly would Is lie that letteth go the wine mid re- ter. scboolmnster who during his fifty-one like to see the ladies of Sacramento fall dlen conveying them through the Is to deny the existence of the great years <f superintendence of n lur e men who have died for their faith and taineth the dross. ami the sieve is lie into line and gently remind the proper street* in tanks. How He Wound t'p. school had given 911.500 canlngs. 121. their country. Nonsense! 'Tis the last that letteth go the bran and retainelh State otlleers that there is work to do at "Sad about Bingham, Isn't it?” 000 floggings, 200,000 custodes. l!’,6.- plea of n knave mid issues out of the the tine flour. The student who be Somehow whenever we hear a man An Irishman says lie nlw: y» shuts Sutter’s fort in Sai-ramento. The Na “What’s the matter with Bingham?” 000 tips with th»* ruler, 10,200 boxeaou Jiouth of a fool. The sterling strength gins at least to wish to belong to the bls eyes when be looks at u lady's tive Sons took up the goo»| work and called an Adonis we long to limit him of man and woman rebukes It every- Inst uumed class will not have bei-u "He went to tlie bad being a good the ear mid 22,700 tusks by the heart.— faults. Sent to college ill vain. fellow.”—Baltimore News. Delineator have done much toward iestoring and up and smash his pretty nose. w here.—School ui a ster. Tlie Congressional Directory makes no mention of the baths which take up • goodly amount of space in the sub basement of the capitol. They are a time honored Institution and are main tained at the government's expense for the members. Care, however, has been taken not to give undue prominence to the fact that the taxpayers provide sumptuous baths where their repre sentatives can go aud recover from tlie effects of state dinners or wilder dissi pations without more Interruption than is absolutely necessary from tlieir otti cial duties. The bouse baths are par ticularly luxurious. The hulls are car peted with velvet which makes tlie door covering of the committee rooms appear like burlap by comparison. The tubs are of heavy porcelain, the plumb ing is silver plated, and all the other furnishings are in keeping with this elegance. The attendants are said to be the most expert in the country, and. while they are not carried on the pay roll ns "rubbers,” masseurs, chiropo dists and manicures, theirs is the work of those specialists just the same. On the house side a marble bathtub has Just been installed that is marvel ous in its elegance. The stone from which It was liewn was imported from Italy. The tub was hollowed out by hand, and its interior fans been polished until it shines like a mirror. It is said to have cost over $1,000. This marble tub is placed in a room which has a wainscoting of Italian marble. The plumbing appliances are said to be the finest ever placed on a bathtub in this country. "Hello. Jinks! Why. I haven't seen you for several weeks. How's your health?” ■Poorly. Every little thingthong seems t<> affect me lately. Well, at any rate you are looking like a kingkong.” “Feeling that way, except for a slight touch of spring fever." •'Yes; spriiiLsprong always affects me too; makes my head ringrong.” "What in thunder is the matter with you, old man, the way you’ve got to talking?" "Noihing thong!” said Jinks, making a swinging movement of his nrm through empty air as Ills friend backed away in amazement und alarm. "1 hear that you have become a great devotee to the fashionable fad of tuble tennis.” “Yes,” he said wildly. “I like to have my flingflong and enjoy the banjo sing song of the game of pingpong at every racket's swingswong while the cellu loid sphere is on the wingwong. I know that game's tlie thingthong’'— Gently the keepers from tlie asylum led him away to his padded cell, tin first victim of the omnipresent game of pingpong.—Baltimore Herald.