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WILLAMETTE FABMER; PORTLAND, OBEQON, OCTOBER 21, 1881.
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Edited by Hrs Harriot T. Clarke.
THE ENVIOUS WREN.
On, the ground lived a heu,
In a tree lived a w rcn,
Who picked up her food here and there;
While biddy had wheat
And all nice things to eat;
Said the wren, "I declare 'tisn't fair I"
"It is really too bad,"
Sho exclaimed she was mad
"To get out when it's raining this way I
And to earn what you eat,
Doesn't make your food sweet,
In spite of what some folks may say.
"Now there is that hen,"
Said this cross little wren,
"She's fed till she's fat as a drum;
While I strive and sweat
For each bug that I net.
And nobody gives mo a crumb,
"I can't see for my life
Why the old farmer's w if o
Treats her so much better than me:
Suppose on the ground
I hop carelessly around
For a while, and just see what I'll see."
Said this cute little wreu,
"I'll make friends witli the hen,
And perhaps sho will ask me to stay;
And then upon bread
Every day I'd be fed,
And life would bo nothing but play."
So down flew the wren,
"Stop to tea," said the lien;
And soon biddy's supper was sent;
But scarce stoppinc to taste,
The poor bird left in haste,
And this was the season she went:
When the farmer's kind dame
To the poultry yard came,
She said and the wren shook with fright
"Biddy'8 so fat she'll do
For a pie or a stew,
And I guess I shall kill her to-night."
""prepare forwihtebT-
The losses of farmers by the deterioration
of stock in Winter is simply immense. Tho
loss is not on one class or two, but on all for
want of adequate shelter from the cold. It is
not enough that stock should simply hold
their own; they should make constant gains to
make a profit to their owner. If, in place of
depending on about five months of warm
weather and green food for tho iucreaso and
profit, the entire twelve months w cro appro
priated to tho work of increase, it will readily
be seen that the profits would count very dif
ferently from what they generally do. What
is required to accomplish this desirable object
is proper food to build up flesh and bone in
tho young animals, and a degree of warmth
by constructing proper shelter, that will pre
vent the searching cold from consuming the
animal heat which must be supplied as the
first necessity to keep life in the animal. Tho
supply of fuel when needed is drawn from
every source in the animal stiucture. Not
only the food daily consumed, but the fat,
muscle and tissue built up formerly in milder
weather is taken to keep the fires in the great
animal furnace going. Hence, the man who
allows his stock to remain without warm
shelter during Winter is virtually putting his
corn, hay and provender daily into a slow fire
that gradually consumes, not the grain and
hay alone which he has stored for Winter food
for his stock, but the surplus flesh and fat his
animals have gained through tho previous
Summer, and which he has credited up to
profit, is abstracted and burned in the same
steady going furnace, whose fires must never
be allowed to go out.
The secret of honestly accumulating wealth
is saving what has been gained. To protect
domestic animals from the inclemency of the
Winter is one of the most profitable sources of
economy of the farm. Prairie farms are not
only meagerly supplied with barns and other
buildings for the use of stock as compared
with the older States, but they are exposed to
bleak winds which blow almost constantly.
Timber and building material is also scarce,
such material, at least as is considered neces
sary in the older States which have literally
been hewn out of a wooden country. But for
the shelter and comfortable housing of stock
of all kinds, it is not essential that costly
structures should be supplied. Hogs, especi
ally tho younger portion ot the swino family,
should be w ell sheltered in Winter. No place
is more comfortable and to their taste, than a
sunny exposure on a hill side or under bluff.
Level the Ground and plant a fork in front and
rear to support a ridge pole. Let the pole butt
the hank at the bank end, and lean stakes
against the ridge polo at an angle of -to or SO
degrees, cover with straw or coarse hay, and
throw on this sheating several inches in thick
ness of earth. Spread on this a covering of
long coarse swale grass, confine this covering
in place by two or three light poles placed
horizontally on the roof and secured by cords,
wire or withs, reaching from pole to pole and
passing over the ridge, which Bhould have a
light pole laid along it. Cut a ditch round the
outside to let the water off, and lay a log six
or eight inches in diameter across the end of
the shed, which must be fastened firmly in
place by driving stout stakes on either tide of
the log, and you have a dry, warm, and com
fortable o'uelter for hogs of all ages. Give
them a good bed of. clean straw, hay or leaves
which should be changed frequently. Such a
shelter as this is worth many bushel of corn
to the older hogs, while for pigs something of
the kind ii indiscernible. Make as many
sleeping apartments of this kind as necessary
to accommodate the herd without crowding,
and the saving of feed and improvement in the
atock during the Winter will yield more profit
probably on the outlay than any other invest
ment of the season. A great loss is often in
curred in the dairy by failing to provide inffi
dent protection for the cows in Winter.
When it U known that a draft of cold air or
hearty drink of ice water will perceptibly
check the flow of milk in a cow, it may read.
Uy be inferred what curtailing of the milk
accretion most accompany poor shelter land
cold, uncomfortable quarters for the cows dur
log the entire Winter season. The fowls, too,
thoso minor appendages of the farm stock
must receive their share of attention in warm,
dry shelter for the Winter. A shed liko that
provided for cattle, though it need not be so
high, provided with roosting poles will accom
modate tho fow Is. This shelter may be im
proved by partially closing it in front. Feed
well through the Winter and plenty of eggs in
January, February and March, with early
broods of Spring chickens, will amply repay
all the care and expense bestowed on this
branch of tho stock. By a little extra, intel
ligent attention to tho fowls, eery farmer
might add to his revenue annually a hundred
dollars in clear cash. Nothing on tho farm
sells so readily as well fed, well grown young
fowls. The ,Kalf starved, lean things which
farmers generally carry to town do not sell for
cash cither readily or for such handsome
prices as desired, hence the complaint, no
profit iu fowls.
choiciTrecipes;
Canniso Rir-E Tomatoes. Select nice,
smooth medium-sized tomatoes, skin and slice
them. Fill your cans just as full as you can
crowd them in; put tho cover on each can,
but not the rubber. Place your cans in a
wash boiler on a board; this board should bo
filled with holes. If a board is not handy
place shingles under them. Fill tho boiler
with water nearly to tho top of tho cans. Let
them boil from three-quarters of an hour to
an hour. When dono fill up all the cans full
with the cooked fruit.
Sweet Tomato Pickles. Two pecks of
giccn tomatoes sliced, and six large onions;
sprinkle a teaspoonful of salt over them and
let them stand over night; drain off in the
morning. Then tako two quarts of water and
one of vinegar and boil them in this fifteen or
twenty minutes; after boiling put them on a
sieve and drain them. Now tako four quarts
of vinegar, four pounds of brown Bugar, one
half pound of white mustard, one teaspoonful
each of ground cloves, allspice, cinnamon,
ginger, mustard and cayenne pepper. Put
all in a kettle and cook about tw enty minutes,
or until all are tender. If desired the mustaid
can be placed in little bags,
Prkseiu'ED Tomatoes. Take ripo toma
toes, scald and remove tho skins, make a
syrup in the propoition of three-quarters of a
pound of sugar to a pound of fruit. Put tho
tomatoes in jars, add, to every pound of to
matoes, one lemon sliced; pour tho syrup on
boiling hot and cover closely. Pour off tho
syrup the next day, heat it boiling hot and
turn back iuto jars. Do this for five succes
sive days.
Tea Cake. Half cupful of butter, 1 cup
ful of sugar, 1 cupful currants, 2 eggs, half
cupful of water, 2 cupfuls of flour, and flavor
to taste.
Lemon PiE.Grato the rind of one lemon,
and add juice; yolks of 3 eggs, 1 cupful of
sugar, 1 tablespoonful of butter, 2 tablespoon
fuls of flour; put in crust and bake. When
cooked, spread whites of eggs beaten stiff,
and place in oven to brown.
, Poultry on the Farm.
To keep poultry -on a farm is economical.
When a farmer keeps a herd of cows, a flock
of sheep together with horses and hogs, there
is always room on the farm for a good stock
of poultry. Even when all the cows, sheep
and hogs are kept that there is room for,
there is still room for poultry. It is almost
a necessity for every family to keep a pig, in
order that the refuse and house slops may bo
utilized ; it is in the same sense that poultry
are valuable they are the scavengers of the
fain). There is no class of fowls that require
very much room on the farm. Still they do
require room and attendance, and they may
be kept in such a shiftless manner that will
be found unprofitable. All kinds of poultry
may be kept provided they have the run of
the barnyard ; but they must be kept in such
a manner as to prevent their ravage in gar
den and grain fields. Turkeys, ducks, geese
and hens.may be kept all summer without
using one square yard of room available for
any other purpose. Caro should be observed
in providing for ducks and geese that they
may not have the privilege for such they
will deem it of fouling the water required
for the stock, or making themselves a nuis
ance in any other manner.
Youngchickens and turkeys will require some
care for tho first few w eeks of their existence ;
after that they may bo trusted to care for
themseh es to a great oxtent. Poultry may
be raised and a flock of hens kept producing
eggs all summer without tho outlay of a dol
lar for grain. Sour milk from the dairy is
very good for young poultry, and there are
many other articles of refuse on the farm that
can be profitably used in the maintainance of
fowls. Now why is it that farmem do not
indulgo in the luxury of fresh eggs daily du
ring the summer, and also fresh poultry more
than they do? I know that it is to often the
case that all tin eggs produced on the farm
are sold for groceries and other small items of
household expenses. I know that too often
all the poultry are sold to the butcher and
that sometimes the farmer does not taste a
fresh egg or chicken during the eutiro year,
This is unwise. With a little care sufficient
eggs can be produced not only to make a
profitable item in the farmers income, but
also to enable him to gratify his taste for
fresh eggs a well. Poultry may be produced
a cheaply at any other class of meat.'. K:
Moreland, in Rural KtwYorler.
Effect of Food ob Efff.
All varieties of poultry can be kept well
and economically upon screenings composed
of all manner of seeds. They can be also kept
upon table refuse, sour milk and decaying
meat scrap and musty grain. This may be an
inducement for keeping poultry, but the ques
tion arises whether it is the best way to keep
poultry where an excellent quality of eggs and
flesh is desired. Beef may be feed on dis
tillery slops, but the quality is very much in
ferior to corn feed beef. Onions, cabbage,
clover, and filthy water affect the taste and
quality of the butter and milk of the cows to
which they are fed. Pork mado from corn is
very much superior to the swill fed article.
When a fine quality of eggs and chickens Is
desired, poultry should be vigorous and
healthy in order that their digestive organs
may do their duty. Care should be taken to
see that the poultry house is properly ventila
ted and not kept too warm, as a vitiated at
mosphere has very much to do w ith the profit
and health of the flock. Poultry, to be kept
profitably, must bowatcrcd, housed and fed
abundantly, with frequent changes in diet.
The poultry keeper who attends to these de
tails may reasonably expect to realize consid
erable profit. Some profit may, however, bo
realized when kept simply as the scavengers
of the farm, if ordinny caro is taken to see
that they sufficient food and shelter; but tho
quality of tho product is inferior. Corn and
wheat produce the richest flesh and cgfjs, and
should be tho principal food employed. Buck
wheat and decaying vegetables are the poorest
foods, not only for quality but color of flesh
and eggs.
A Most Piteous Scene.
Ciiicaoo, September 30. A gentleman who
has just returned from Cleveland relates this
pathetic incident which occurred on Monday:
A little company, including the President's
mother, wife and sons, was grouped around the
dias in silence, not a word being said above a
whisper for nearly an liour. It was only when
a little figure in black arose from the group
and approached the casket that the stillness
was interrupted. It was the mother. Her
pent-up feelings could no longer endure the
torture of enaction. She moved over to the
coffin and leaning upon it laid her check upon
tho cover, her lips moved in silent prayer,
and tears couring across her wrinkled and
worn face. Other wept in sympathy at the
moving spectacle, and sho was tenderly led
back to her scat, her tremulous lips forming
tho inarticulate phrases, "Jimmy, oh! Jamc3,
my boy, my boy 1" Her distress was piteous
enough to movo a heart of adamant. A moth
er's grief is sorrowful at all times, but circum
stances mado this doubly so. Tho poor old
woman of eighty yeais had nursed her darling
through an infancy of poverty to see himgiow
up to greatness and fame, and tho thoughts
of his dying as he was entering upon the real
ization of her most extravagant dreams was
too much for her. The pictuie she presented
was one of unutterable agony of spirit.
That Bean Porridge.
"Bean porridge hot, bean porridge cold,
Bean porridge is best nine days oldv"
Half a pint is enough for a small family at
ono dinner, peihaps, but I don't think they
would have much left to try how they liko it
cold, or w armed up tho next day. Now we
like it nice and hot at noon, and then when
the children come home from school they like
it cold in fact, we all like it cold; and if
there is a dishful left to make hot for the next
day's dinner, why, wo aro almost sure it is a
little better than it was the first day. But as
for spreading it out for nine days, I think that
never was dono. Some man wrote that coup
let who judged that because he lilted his por
ridge better when heated the third or fourth
time, he would like it best the ninth day,
Most people will prefer their porridge without
bits of meat, so they can take out the bono
before the neat begins to break off.
The Human Pulse.
Physicians have always attached to all ages
the greatest importance to tho frequency of
the heart's action as indicated by the pulse.
The number nf pulsations of the heart, as
stated by Dr. Milne Edwards, average 70 per
minute in a male and from six to ten moro in
a female. The pulso of Napoleon, however,
was much below the average. That of Sir
William Congrevo is said to have been about
128 per minute even in health. But, as a
general thing, the variationn at Guy's com
piled by Milne Edwards, have been verified
by observation.
The following table of the pulso is interest
ing in this connection:
Males' Males'
Age. Average. Afe. Acrag;o.
2 W 7 07 42 to 49, .. . 70
8toI4... . 84 49to5d U
14to2l 70 60to83 73
21to23 73 03to70 70
2Sto35 70 70to77 W
35to33 CS 77 to84 .. 71
New York Jferald.
A Comedy In Real Life.
The Cleveland Leader reports a comedy in
real life wiiicii took place in Erie, Peun., last
week. The heroine was a buxom young
woman, whe'sa husband had died a year ago.
When she had worn her weeds six months
the would-be hero of the play came a-wooiug,
and his attentions not being distasteful to the
widow, sho consented to marry him in twelve
months and a day from tho date of her first
husband's death. The happy day iell on
Wednesday last and the ceremony was to take
place at the bride's house. A magnificent
wedding feast was prepared, and about sixty
guests were invited. The hour appointed for
the marriage was 0 p. M. in the forenoon
the bride groom-elect went of to invite a few
friends in the country, who had been forgot
ten. The afternoon mail brought a postal
card from-'him, statins; that he had con
scientious scruples about marrying a woman
so recently widowed. He would make it a
matter of prayer, and would abide the result
of his feelings when through. She was not to
take this as a positive refusal to marry, but
if he did not arrive at 6 o'clock r. M. she
might consider the marriage "off." The
widow did not faint, nor go iuto hysterics, but
donned her wedding attire and welcomed her
guests with a smiling face. At 0 o'clock all
the guests were there, and with them, of
course, the minister; but no bridegroom had
appeared. With nnraffled countenance the
expectant bride "called the meeting to order"
and read aloud the recreant lowr's card.
When the storm of denunciation had subsided
she added; "But that needn't spoil the din
ner," and thereupon the guests fell to ban
queting, none more heartily than the mistress
of the bouse herself. When the table was
cleared dancing began, and an elderly bach
clor led the German with the disappointed!,?)
bride. He became so enamored with her
that within an hour ho proposed; he was ac
cepted; and tho minister was recalled; and at
11 r. m. the wedding took place, with tho
new pridegroom. But scarcely had tho
bridal kiss been bestowed when in rushed the
too-conscientious lover, who after, a protract
ed season of prayer, had concluded to como
back and wed. Ho was just in timo to con
gratulate the bride, not his now, but another's,
and then hastily stole away, resolved within
to stifle conscienco ero ho sought another
bride.
Cheese-Making and Pasturage.
An Englishman writes interestingly to tho
Country Gentleman upon tho effect of soil
upon milk and cheese. I am positivo tho
most intelligent and most practical dairymen
in tho United State9, ho saj s, havo not a
clear knowledge of tho reason w by tho checso
is of that pcculiat ly rich and palatablo flavor
from tho pasture, whilo it will bo inferior
from other appearing to havo finer and better
grass. There is no doabt that tho native
grasses w Inch become established on tho best
land when long undisturbed by plowing, aro
tho best adapted for cheese making. There
is something beyond mere fertility of soil and
the presenco of tho best herbage, and also of
the absenco of weeds and objectionable grass
es. 1 havo farmed extensively in tho most
noted dairy counties in England. On the
magnificent domain I farmed, my employer,
who descended from the nobility of Henry
VIII, w as proud of the fame of his clteeso as
aught elso belonging to tho barony, but it was
not the best land which produced tho best
cheese. We had fields which would make
beef in half the timo tho dairy fields would,
and yet it would spoil tho cheeso to let tho
dairy cows grazo there. There is an error
wliieh the educated and leading agricultur
ists of tho United States fall into, which is
stating that the English dairy farmers usually
feed much meal and other stimulating food to
their dairy cows. This is a very great mis
tako Tho practico of feeding anything but
grass ftom May till October, is unknown
among the dairy districts. Dry, hilly soil is
never chosen for dairying in England, but
sound valley or good low land is generally
tho diameter of dairy farms.
So well understood is the fact of adapting
proper soil for dairying, and cheese-making in
paiticular, that thcie is not ono farm iu a
hundred which has ono half of it suitable to
graze tho dairy cow. "It is a first-class dairy
firm," yet, taking a succession of farms aver
aging 250 acres each, in a distance of 10
miles, and if each farm shonld contain about
20 fields, there w ould not be five fields out of
the 20 which would mske primo cheese, and
often there is only one laree Cold Inch is
used for grazing tho milch cows upon, and
probably it has been tho only dairy field for
hundreds of years, A dairy field is always
a dairy field.
.jfat fffa hUiltx.
SATURDAY NIGHT.
Placing the littb hats all in a row.
Ready for church on tho morrow you know;
Washing wee faces and little blacx lists,
Getting them ready and fit to be kissed;
Putting tbein into clean garments and white;
That is what mothers aro doing to-night.
Spying out holes in tho little worn hose,
Laying by shoes that are worn tnrougli the toes,
Looking o'er garments bo faded and thin
Who but a mother knows whero to begin!
Changing a button to make it look right
That is what mothers arc doing to night.
Calling the littlo ones all 'round her chair,
Hearing them lisp forth their soft evening
prayer,
Tflling them stories of Jesus of old,
Who loves to gather the lambs to His fold;
Watching, they listen with childish delight
That is what mothers are doing to-night.
Creeping so softly to tako a last peep,
After the littlo ones all aro aulecp;
Anxious to know if tho children are warm,
Tucking the blankets around each little form;
Kissing each little face, rosy and bright
That is what mothers are doing to-night.
OUR LETTER BOxT
It seems as if tho week came around very
soon, and only that a few da a havo passed
since wo opened tho little letters tho last
timo, However; it does not toino too
often, for, as wo hao said before, this is tho
very pleasantest part of our duty to open
and read those nioo littlo letters, written by
dear littlo girls and jolly bos, telling so
frankly and honestly of what interests them
most, Uosa says sfio has such good tunes
riding tho old horse. It is quite an accom
plishment for a girl to rido well, though one
should be suro that the horse is not tricky,
and that tho saddle is safo in tho way of
strong straps and buckles. So many sad ac
cidents havo happened toyounggirls by being
thrown from horses. Hosa is public spirited
to bo willing to work so hard to cut a nice
sheaf of oats for exhibition. She ought to
have put her own name on it. It will help
to show Eastern people what fine grain wu
can raise here in Oregon, and maybe induce
people to come here, for that is what we w ant.
Wo must have population, and if the railroad
was finished there would be a great rush of
people coming to our favored climate. But
that miserable ocean trip keeps many from
coming. EJgar has taken pains to havo his
letter look well a well as read well, and he
rauit write again sometime when he finds
time, and tell us more about Sandy and the
falls. Our little "Webfoot Girl" is too shy
to let us print her name, but she must be a
helpful little girl. We should think that 97
blocks ought to be enough for a quilt. Al
most everyone are complaining of a short ap
ple crop. One triend says that they have al
ways had apples by the hundred buthels, but
this year will not havo thirty. There will be
a good demand for green fruit everywhere,
and in the East there will " a great call for
dried fruits, so that every ;iy had better
try and save and dry all thetjipUi and other
fruit that they can. Now Lore in the world
can be found such nico plums and prunes as
wo havo herein Oregon, and it will in time
be tho great fruit growing region for in tho
East there are all sorts of worms and bugs
that spoil fruit, so that thcro is no perfect
fruit there; even tho currants aro full of
worms.
Silverto.v, Sept. 23, 1SS1.
Editor HomoCirclo:
It has been six months since I wrote a let
ter for tho Circle, so I thought I would writo
again, My little sister Lillio and myself havo
a nico timo riding old Gcorgo. Pa has cut
2,)0 acres of grain with his Marsh and Deer
ing twino binder this year. Ho cut 30 acres
for Mr. Tuggle, near Silverton, without miss
ing a bundle or threading tho needlo. 1 sent
a sheaf of oats to Mr. P. Shulze, Portland,
Oregon. It took me all forenoon to cut them, as
I had to use a butcher knife. For fear of tiring
you, I will closo my letter with best wishes
for Aunt Hetty. Kosa E. Ficancis.
Pleasant Home, Or., Sept. 23, 1881.
Editor Homo Circlo:
I am a littlo girl eight years old. I havo
four sisters and two brothers. Wo have sold
all our chickens, Wo w ill not have hardly
any apples this year. I am piecchig a quilt
and have 97 blocks finished. I help wash tho
dishes, set the tablo and tako caro of baby.
School will commence tho 1st of October; I
sUdy reading, spelling and arithmetic.
A WkdiootGim,.
Pleasant Home, Sept. 20, 1881.
Editor Home Circlo:
I thought I would write you a letter, as I
never have written one. As tho rest of the
boys and gills tell of their pets. I will tell
about mine. I havo a dog and a calf. I havo
five sisters and one brother. lam 13 years
old. Wo went to Sandy tho other day and
went to tho falls; it is a very rough, rocky
place. Tho water is very swift. Our school
will commenco the 1st of October. I liko to
go to school ery much. I livo on a farm 18
miles from Portland, Wo raised about ono
hundred bushels of grain this year. Thoy ate
talking of building a railroad through hero
within sciven miles of us. Wo can hoar them
blasting. They havo been getting out tics
here all Summer. E. W. M.
ODDS AND ENDS.
Tho seashoro is the place you always find
Sabbath breakers.
When the Pilgrims first landed they fell on
their knees alter which thoy fell on tho abor
igines. It has been proved by experiment that if
young turkeys bo fed on soft food mixed with
milk instead of w atcr much superior and moro
tender meat will bo produced.
Geese arc easily kept ; grass and water form
their chief requirements. These, with a fair
supply of corn, oats and boiled potatoes
make up their bill of faro.
"In what condition was the patriarch Job
at tho cud of his life?" asked a Brooklyn Sun
day School teacher of a quiet looking boy at
the foot of the class. "Dead, 'calmly replied
tho quict-looKing boy.
The Earl of Beaconsfield died holding in his
right hand tho hands of two men whom ho
had crested peers. His official career was one
long game, and he peers to havo died with a
full hnud. American Queen.
"Total abstinenco is so excellent a thing
that it cannot be carried to too gicat an ex
tent. In my passion for it I even carry it so
far as to totally abstain from total abstinenco
itself," Mark Twain.
A small boy went to sco his grandmother.
Aftci looking eagerly around tho handsomely
furnished room where she sat, ho exclaimed,
inquiringly, "Oh grandmamma, whero is tho
miserable table papa saj s you keep?"
Thoy w cro at a dinner party, and ho re
marked that ho supposed sho was fond of
ethnology, Sho said sho was, but sho was
not very well, and tho doctor had told her
not to eat anything foi eiseit but' oranges.
It is said that Sitting Dull has Ik como sad
and despondent ; so much so that a vague
liopo prevails that ho iniy commit suicide.
This is about tho only sanguinary act hu has
not committed in his illustrious career. De
troll Fret I'renn.
This notieo is found nostril up in a Virginia
blacksmith shop: "Notis Do copai tncmhip
herctofoie lesisting betwixt mo and Mose
Skinner is hereby resolved. Pern what owe
:1c firm will tcttlo wid mo, and dcin what wo
owe will settlo wid Mose."
King KaUkua'H army consists of exactly
sixty men. Well, if that is tho case, wo
don't wonder at his wanting to sell his
kingdom. Ho might trado his army lor our
nivy, swap tho navy for dog, shoot tho ca
nino and finally diu happy.
"Oh, Aunt Hester, how can you bo such a
hypocrite as to go to church, and exort and
pray, and pretend to be so good, after stealing
and lying as you have?" "Missus," responded
Aunt Hester, "do you spco I'se goin' to gib
up my brcssed Jesus for one old turkey lieu!"
Indian corn in North Germany often as
mimes a place among the household plants,
It is regarded there as tropical. In our coun
try it becomes tropical only under tho namo
of Bourbon, and then it warms a man up so
that ho feels as if ho were under the tropic f
Capricorn.
In Gei many the mischief done to growing
boys by tobacco has been found to be se great
that the government has ordered the police
to forbid lads under JO to smoke on the
streets. Thus does a cruel and despotic Gov.
eminent rob the boys of all that makes life
worth living, mm! leave the young gentlemen
entirely without occupation.
A lady called upon her milliner the other
day to get tho character of her tervaut. The
respectable appearance of the latter was
lytmuHio
beyond questioning. "But is sho honest!"
asked tho lady. ' I am not so certain about
that," replied tho milliner, "I havo sent her
to you with my bill a dozen times and she has
nover given me tho money."
Two colored men took refngo under a treo
in a violent thunder storm. "Julius cau you
pray!" said one. "No, Sam," was the reply;
"uebber prayed in my life." "Well, can't
you sing a hymn ! Just then tho lightning
struck a treo near by, shivering it, when tho
first speaker exclaimed : "Sco heah, honey,
sumfin' ligious has got to bo done, an' dat
mighty sudden, too; s'poso you pass around
tho hat 1"
Old undo Mose, a Ga!eston paper reports,
went into Levi Schaumbcrg's storo on Austin
avenue to buy a silk handkerchief, but was
almost paralyzed on learning tho prico. Levi
explained that the high prico of silk goods
was caused by sonio disease among silk worms.
"How much docs you osk for this picco of
tape! ' asked the old man.
"Ten cents," was tho reply.
"Ten cents 1 Jowhilikins 1 so do tapo hai
riz, to ; I s'posu do causo ob dat am becauso
dar's sumfin de matti wid do tapo wums.
Dis seems to bo guino tor bo a mighty tough
yeah on worms, anyhow."
It is related that recently ono of tho Now
York aldermen had an idea. Moved by its
rarity, he hastened to lay it beforo his broth
er Solons. "Gontlemen," said ho. "I think
it would add to tho attractiveness of Central
Park if wo wero to import some dongolas
say a dozen and place them in tho lake."
Tho idea was favorably received by all but
ono. Ho was tho economist of tho board, and
m his veins ran tho blood of Irish kings. Ho
roso, "Gmtlcincu," ho remarked, "tho idea
is a good wan, but I wudinako an umindmont.
Why should we buy twelvo of thim! It
would bo useless expinse. I mako a motion
that wo buy to of thim a male wan and a
femalo wan. Then, gentlemen, let nature
tako her coorsc."
Unconscious Jokes.
Long life and old habits crcato ail amusing
self-oblivion when comparison with others is
suggested. It is something liko nu inebriate's
phantasy which makes him change places
with tho world, and think every man drunk
but himself or liko tho simplo unconscious
ness of an old English servant, who, when
his master, meaning to discharge him, told
him, "Wo must part John," asked, "Whero
do yo propose goni', sit?"
Tho story of Thad Stevcim saying to tho
stout young men who used to carry him iu
his chair to tho House of Representatives
"Well, boys, who will cany mo when you
aro gone?" is older than Stovcns, however
original it might havo been with him.
An old gentleman seventy years old, onco
remarked:
"I tako pains with my writing, so that
when I get old I shall bo ablo to read it."
Another, aged sevety-scven, it tho head
of a largo pudlishiug houso, on being remon
strated with tor working so hard, answered:
"I dont feel it now, but I expect I shall iu
after life."
Tho youngest daughter, of soveuty-twn
years, having died, one of her parents, who
was ono hundred years old, remarked;
"I always told theo, Jhon' wo should
nover rear that child."
Temperauce.
A correspondent from Pleasant Hill writes:
Men, bo steadfast when tempiranco meetings
aro over and enthusiasm begins to dio out.
Heincmbcr that you havo solemnly commit
ted yourself to a life of sobriety. Lot noth
ing tempt you to tamper with appetite. Your
enemy is ono of tho old sort; givo him an inch
and ho will take a nulo. You cannot afford
any experiments. Tho wisest king doclared
that a lofty spirit camo beforo a fall. Thoso
who have been tho loudest in denouncing a
fallen brother havo often become victims to
tho Bamo or a worse weakness. You had a
choice and chose temperance. You did a good
thing; tho old sensible think. Now bo horoio
and fight your evil iiiiluutions until death.
Oi.ii Soldi ek.
Children
CRY
FOR
Pitcher's
Castoria.
Mothers like, and Physician
rooomxaend it.
IT IS NOT NARCOTIC.
OENTAUIt IilNIMKNTS ; the
World' rrcat Pain-Relieving
romcdioH. Thoy lieu, Hoothe and
cure Burns, Wound, Weak Back
and ItlieuiiiutlMin upou Man,
and Spruliiw, Galls, and Luiue
nesH upon Beasts. Cheap, quielc
and reliable.
SPURTS of cUagwtlmg Mwu,
SnuAUa, CrackUa Falsa la tha
Head, Fetid Breath, Deataaea, ad
any Catarrhal Coaaplala.t,caa fee ex
terminated by Wei Da Mayer's
Catarrh Core, a, Constltutloaal Jam
tldota by Absorption. The most Is
portaat Discovery alaoe Vaoolaatlam
i
i '1
h
r
X