Gardening
'N Workshop
1 News
11C JUwi
Quips and
Quotes
A newlywed couple invited a friend over
for his first visit to their new apartment and
were giving instructions:
"It's the large apartment building near
the bus stop. Our bell is on the right-hand
side, near the bottom of the list. When you
spot it, ring the bell with your elbow. When
we press the downstairs-door buzzer, just
push against the door with your shoulder."
The friend asked: "But why can't I use
my hands to press the bell?"
"For goodness sake," the newlywed ex
claimed, "you're not coming empty-handed,
are you?" Willis Shanty
The tmall boy dashed out of the house,
but his mother called him back to ask
where he was going. "I'm going out to
play ball," he replied.
"With whom are you playing?"
"I'm going to play with God."
"You shouldn't joke about Cod," the
mother replied, aghast.
"I'm not joking, Mom. I throw the ball
up to Him, and He throws it back to me."
.Frances Benson
Committee Member's Madrigal
Who's got big plans and enthusiasms?
The chairman has 'em.
Who'll do the work he plots with eal?
We'll'.
Oh, we'll gallop and labor here and there,
While the jolly chairman warms his chair.
And who'll get credit for this affair?
He'll!
Georgie Starbuck Galbraith
It was a very important job, and the
president of the company was interviewing
high-caliber young men. "What would jou
say your main pursuits in life are?" he asked
one applicant sternly.
"It depends," the applicant replied.
"On what?" the executive persisted.
"Well, in the morning it's the 8:32 bus,
and in the evening it's the 5:47 bus."
Howard Stalls
An American businessman was taking a
visiting Japanese executive on a tour of a
booming U.S. city. The Japanese was as
tonished at the wonders he saw. Pleased,
the American concluded on a proud note:
"And now I want you to see the Japanese
garden we've built in our park."
"Beautiful! Beautiful!" the Japanese said
when they entered the garden. "Oh, if we
only had something like this in Japan!"
John Shotwell
"id be satisied if ihey weren't quite so lamef"
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