The Weekly enterprise. (Oregon City, Or.) 1868-1871, August 25, 1871, Image 1

Below is the OCR text representation for this newspapers page. It is also available as plain text as well as XML.

    o
0
o
TOL. 5.
OREGON CITY, OREGON, FRIDAY, AUGUST 25, 1871.
NO 42.
X
o
o
o
S I
o
o
o
o
o
o
o
o
o
o
0
o
v
nElje iDccktij '(Enterprise.
4 Z EMO CRA TIC PA PER,
FOR THE
'Business Man, the Farmer
And the FAMILY CIRCLE.
J sCED EVERY FRIDAY BY
A. NOLTNER,
EDITOR AND PUBLISHER.
CFFICEla Dr. Thessing's Brick Building.
H TERMS of SUBSCRIPTION:
Single Copy one year, m afiratsce, $2 50
'TERMS of ADVERTISING.
'Transient advertisements, including all
lej.il notices, $ sq. of 12 linea, 1 w.$ 2 50
'?or etch sab-sequent insertion 1 00
''ine Colu:nn, one year $120 00
3I.tlf " " - 60
;Qi.irter " " 40
"Business Card, 1 square one year 12
Kg" Remittances to be made at the risk o
Subscribers, and at the expense of Agents.
Q BOOK AND JOB PRINTING.
tfg" The Enterprise office is supplied with
be.ititiful. Approved styles of tvpe, and mod
ern M.VCUl.VK IMlUSrtKS. which will enable
lie Proprietor ti do Job Pi luting at all times
Neat, Quick and Cheap I
KW Vir!s stilicited.
All 11 nintis tr in ictions upon a Specie basis.
BCSIXUSS CARDS.
CUA11L.CS JG. WARKEN,
Attorney at Law,
Oregon City, Oregon.
Rept.lfcly.
, TOIIN M. BACOX,
IS Si
Importer and Dealer in
ss s;ja xjz cs5 jais 9
STATIONERY, PERFUMERY. &c, &c,
Oregon CHy, Oregon.
At Char man $' IVarner' old stand, lately oc
cupied bj S. Ackerman, Main street.
10 tf
JOHN FLEMING,
mm
DEALER IN
BOOKS AND STATIONERY,
IX MYERS' FIRE PROOF BRICK,
HKIS STREET, ORRGON OREGON'.
MACK & WELCH,
OFFICE In Odd Fellows' Temple, cor er
of First and Alder Streets, Portland.
The patronage of thoe desiring superior
operations is in special request. . Nitrousox
'idd for the painless extraction of teeth.
j:?f Artificial teeth "better than the best,"
'and as cheap as the cheapest.
Dec. 23:tf
Dr. J, H. HATCH,
DENTIST,
The patronage of those desiring tirst Class
Operations, is respectfully solicited.
Satisfaction in all cases guaranteed.
X. U. Nitrous Uxyde administered for the
I'ainiess Extraction of Teeth.
Otfccb In VVeigaut's new building, west
'aide of First street, between Alder and Mor
-ison streets, Portland, Oregon.
Live and Let Live."
T7IELD3 & STIUCKLER,
DEALERS IN
PROVISIONS, GROCERIES,
COUNTRY PRODUCE, &c,
o cnoicr. avines and liquors'.
.f".Vt the old stand of Woi tman & Fields
Oiegon Cit , Oregon. 13tf
ytf IT. W ATKINS, M. D.,
SURGEON'. Foktuvxd, Oregc ri.
O . OFFICE Odd Fellows' Temple, corner
First and lder streets Residence corner of
Main and Seventh streets.
W. F. HIGHFIELD,
Established since 1849, at the old stand,
Miin Street, Oregon, City, Oregon.
An Assortment of Watches, Jew
elry, and Seth Thomas' weight
blocks, ali of which are warranted
r be a represented.
Uepainnss aone on tui u u-nc,
nd thankful for past favors.
CLA.EK GREENMAN,
City 0aTtMn
OREGON CITY.
tt3 AH orders for the delivery of merchan
dise or p ickaxes and freight of whatever d'ss
cr'mtioa.to anv p art of the city, willbeexe
citel promptly and with care.
o jTEW YORK HOTEL,
(Deutfches Gafthaus,)
No. 17 Frrmt Street, opposite the Mail steam
ship landing, Portland, Oregon.
H. R0THF03, J. J. WILKENS,
PROPRIETORS.
Board per Week $ 5 00
" ' " with Lodsing 6 00
" " Dav 1 00
2 -
A. G. WALLTNG'S
Pioneer Book Bindery.
OREGOXIAN BUILDING,
Corner or Front and Alder Street,
PORTLAND, OREGON.
BLANK BOORS RULED and BOUND to
nv desired nattm.
MUTC BOOKS, MAGAZINES, NEWS-
- .,1V.-., etc., oouna in every variety ot
style known to the trade.
(Ters frotn the country promptly at-
How to Make the Earm Pay. "
To make the farm pay, propor
tionate to investment, requires
greater skill than most farmers
think necessary, and more than
many of. them possess. There is
more science required in successful
farming than almost any other
pursuit. Scientific farming is not
as necessary in new countries as in
old, but even there, method and
skill are requisite to success.
Agriculture in the South, since the
war, is nothing more or less than
a gigantic failure, even in Anti
Helium times; the secret of ap
parent success lay in the fact that
labor cost nothing .and could be
made available "neplus ultra."
Many farmers in the Northern
and Northwestern States, are just
as unsuccessful.
There must be a cause for thiss,
what is it ? It is no deficiency in
soil, for our lands are as rich as
need be ; nor climate, for it is per
fectly congenial to the cultivation
of the numerous productions to
which our country is adapted. The
answer I think is in a nut shell,
"the want of diversity of pro
ducts." Unless prices are exhorb
itantly high, the exclusive cultiva
tion of one or two products is
never reuumerated ; there are two
reasons for this ;
First One hand produces more
by being enabled to cultivate a
larger area.
Second Exclusive production
causes over production, and conse
quently low prices, also creates a
demand for articles not raised,
consequently high prices for the
necessaries of life.
Tobacco has almost ruined many
portions of Virginia, Kentucky,
Missouri and some of the North
ern States.
Wheat is ruining the Xorthwest
crn States and Territories. Cane
culture is injuring Louisiana, and
Cotton has bankrupted the South.
The almost exclusive production
of cotton has brought upon us the
compound evils of cheap cotton,
high provisions, worthless labor
and exhausted land.
No farmer is making the farm
pay, unless he is keeping up its
fertility. There is nothing gained
by gathering a succession of crops
and wearing out the soil. Crops
will decrease from year to year,
and the land finally becomes val
ueless. To "make the farm pay," first
and foremost, keep up its fertility,
there are three ways of doing this,
rest, rotation and manure the first
adapted to all new countries,
where natural Summer and Winter
range is sufficient, land cheap,
and hay valueless, the second and
third are adapted to countries
where winter food has to be pro
vided for stock. There, instead of
rest, it is more economical to ro
tate with clover, peas, etc., turning
under the second crop as a fertil
izer, and saving the first for hay ;
the third is adapted to all coun
tries where land is extremely high
in such countries it is cheaper to
feed all produce and apply manure,
than to turn under green.
To "make the farm pay" every
farmer must be governed by the
circumstances that surround him,
he is compelled to invest in land
labor and agricultural implements.
Where land is cheap and labor
saving implement high, as much
of the former and as little of the
two latter should be used as possi
ble, this can be accomplished by
devoting the largest portion of the
farm, to summer and winter pas
turage, requiring little labor, ma
chinery, etc., and giving handsome
profit on investment; 1 think this
system well adapted to many por
tions of the Southern States.
Where land and labor are high,
labor-saving machinery is cheap,
as much ot these latter should be
substituted for labor as possible,
food should be cut and fed to
stock, as grazing is too wasteful
where land is an object, many of
the Northen States, furnish exam
ples of such localities where land
is extremely high and labor ex
tremely low. Ten hands can be
profitably employed on the same
area that only one would be re
quired, were the conditions re
versed as in the south.
To "make the farm pay" we
must deversify products, have a
variety to sell instead of raising
one or two and having a variety
to buy. It is cheaper to raise" all
the necessaries of life, (to which
our country is adapted,) than to
raise one or two products and buy
them
To "make the farm pay," study
farming in all of its various
branches, take agricultural period
icals, buy books on agriculture,
don't be afraid of "Book Farming."
Agricltural books are nothing but
the writings and experiences of
our best farmers. If your circum
stances admit of it, buy improved
stock, implements, &c., and even
improved knowledge.
Learn to farm scientifically, sys-
j tematieally and ecnomically, prac
tice a smooth rotation of crops,
save all manure and apply to crops
best.'adapted to it, select good
se.ed cultivate well what you do
cultivate, and my word for it, by
practising all the above you will
have learned "how to make the
farm pay."
: Obidiatt Jones.
Mineral Springs, Ark.
General News Items.
r The Montana mines are paying
better this year than last.
' TelegrapMa-communieation has
been established with Japan.
Silk culture in California has
been attended with great success
up to the present time.
Grant is not coming to the Pa
cific coast this season, on account,
it is said, of John Morrissy having
won heavily of him at the Long
Branch races.
The Cincinnati Commercial says:
"The young man at Hamilton who
shot himself in showing how Mr.
Vallandigham shot himself, in the
attempt to explain how Myers shot
himself, is recovering."
The price of wool ruling very
high this year; our wool growers
have done nobly. The value of
wool exports in 1871 will approxi
mate to the handsome sum of ($5,
000,000) Fine Millions of Dollars.
The Boston Transcript remarks
that the "proposition to make Gen.
Butler their candidate for Govern
or is reuniting the Massachusetts
Republicans. They will stand
shoulder to shoulder in opposi
tion to him."
There are twenty-four United
States Senators to be elected be
tween this and the first of next
Marc h. The character and calibre
ot the men elected will depend in
a great measure upon the amount
of interest workingmen take in the
elections this fall.
Speaker Blaine charges in a re
cent speech that the Democrats do
not recognize the Constitution. "It
is no wonder they do not," says
the Courier-Journal, "the Consti
tution has been so frightfully mu
tilated by the Radical party that
even its own father wouldn't re
cognize it."
The grasshoppers of the great
Western deserts have taken wing,
and are blasting vegetation from
the Minnesota River to the British
possesions. The farmers have al
ready suffered severely from the
effects of the terrific winds that
have recently swept over the great
er portion of Minnesota; but this
last misfortune has discouraged
them so thoroughly that some of
those who have lost most, are said
to be seriously contemplating a re
moval to other States.
A Railway Ticket Good
Either Way. In the Superior
Court in Boston, a case of interest
to the traveling public was recent
ly decided. In 18G8, John A.
Coleman, of Boston, attempted to
ride from New York to New
Haven on a coupon ticket, which
was rejected by the coductor on
the ground that although it was
good from New Haven to New
York, it did not pass the holder
over the road in a train going in
the opposite direction Mr. Coleman
insisted that the company was com
pelled to receive the ticket as it
represented money paid for a pas
sage between those points, and he
was put off the train by force, re
ceiving snch injury as to affect his
health. He sued the New York
and New Haven Railroad Com
pany and recovered. The railroad
company obtained a new trial and
was beaten again. On exception
to the ruling of the judg, the de
fendants obtained a third trial,
which terminated in a verdict for
Mr. Coleman for
$3,200
damages.
To Remove Warts. To re
move warts, dissolve an ounce of
white vitriol in five tablespoonfuls
of water, put into a phial, and
rub the warts three or four times a
day, and oftener if convenient. In
two weeks they will be gone, with
out uain or scar. Other remedies
are to moisten the tops of the
warts once a dav with creosote, or
burn a piece of linen or cotton on
any piece of , steel and rub the
moisture left bv the burning on
the warts, repeating the operation
three or four times:
The two Radical fictions in the
House of Delegates of the Terri
tory of Columbia habitually call
one another liars and thieves. The
Courier-Journal savs they are en-
couraged to do this by the loung
Men's Christian Association, which
can get them to tell the truth in no
other way.
It is stated that Dr. Livingstone
has not had any breeches to speak
of, in four years, the merchant
tailors of Ujiji refusing to credit
him. With a little paint, however,
and a segment of lion skin around
his lions, the Doctor has managed
to keep the wolf from his door.
mil l
Death of the Double Baby--0ne Head
Outlives the Other 1
From the Boston Post, July 19th.
We mentioned in our columns
yesterday, the presence in Boston
of a most remarkable child, the off
spring of Joseph and Ann E. Fin
ley. It presented the remarkable
as well as unprecedented phenom
enon of two heads, four arms, and
two legs, and all upon a single
body. The girl for such was its
sex died last evening at No. 6
Bowdoin street. The first half or
head breathed its last at 5, and the
second shortly after 8 o'clock. The
many thousands in the Western or
Middle States who have seen this
marvellous eccentricity of nature
will learn its death with regret.
The child or children as it would
almost seem proper to allude to the
phenomenon had enjoyed excel
lent health from her birth, nine
months ago, until within two
weeks,-at which time one exhibit
ed signs of illness. This, however,
was but temporary. It recovered
and was bright and playful. Since
reaching Boston, a few days since,
the other or the other half was
taken sick and died yesterday af
ternoon, as already stated, "The
two portions of the" body were so
intimately connected that the
death of one rendered that of the
other inevitable. The spectacle
was equally novel, strange and un
paralleled. Upon one end of the
body reposed the head of the
dead infant ; upon the other that
of the. live one with its eyes still
bright and curious, and its lungs
in full breathing order. All that
medical aid could accomplish was
done, but it was found unavailing.
The children died in the presence
of its parents. The corpse presents
th e appearance of two infants
asleep. Apparently they escaped
the ordinary suffering incident to
death, for the countenances had
the expression of repose. The dis
position of the body is not deter
mined upon. Several of our phisi
cians were desirous last evening of
having it opened for examination.
It is doubtful if the parents con
sent. They reside in Morrow
county, Ohio, and live upon a farm.
They have other children, but none
have exhibited any unusual devel
opments. Nor can this' extraordi
nary departure from the laws of
nature be accounted for. In Phil
adelphia, where all the medical So
lons undertook to solve the prob
lem, nothing whatever was brought
to light,
Good Place for
CnmixALS.
Georgia is a good place for crimi
nals. It appears that Gov. Bullock
has, during his incumbency, grant
ed 402 out of 403 applications for
pardons; among the olfences par
doned being fifty-six murders, thirty-one
manslaughters, thirty-six as
saults with intent to kill, and fifty
two burglaries. Bullock, of Geor
gia, beats Scott, of South Carolina,
as a friend of the lawless. It was
thought monstrous of the latter to
nullify the actions of the courts in
20S out of 48G convictions in one
year, by granting pardons to the
former number of convicts, but
Bullock's pardons throw Scott in
to the shade. These carpet-baggers
have fine conceptions of pub
lic duty. No doubt the criminals
pardoned by Bullock and Scott
are "trooly loil" and reliable men
at the polls.
m
Some two weeks ago a voting
mail of culture and good tnste
went to hear a well-known ranter
preach. Getting disgusted before
the sermon was half through, he
left his seat and was going on tip
toe toward the door, when the
preacher roared out : "Young man,
had 3rou rat her go to hell than hear
me preach ? Somewhat startled
at first, the young man faced
about and with a graceful bow re
sponded : "On the whole, parson,
I think I would."
In digging a. well at Emerson.
in Mills county, Iowa, at a depth
ot twenty-nve leet, the digger
struck a large oak log, and after
cutting through it and going a few
feet deeper, he came into a perfect
neap or unu-woou, m tne inuist oi
which water commenced coming
in so that he could go no deeper.
He found specimens of at least
four different kinds of wood in
this drift. The water is unfit for
use.
Out West they tell astorj of a
dor which was great lv interested
in music. lie attended a sinrinor
school, and was subsequently found
in the back yard with a music book
in front of him. beating time with
- . j
his tail on a tin pan, and howling
"Old Hundred."
A singular but striking instance
of the working of the law of com
npnsntion is afforded in the iin
doubted fact that although the
Orangemen are all Protestants, a
raaiority of the orange women are
cooa rtoman oatnoncs.
COURTESY OF BANCROFT LIBRARY,
Miscellaneous.
Jeff Davis swears he didn't do
it.
A bad policy one that is run
out, I
- Strict economy is a great in
come. Parental acres The old man's
corns.
A constant gleaner The tax
gatherer. New name
Corn cribs.
"Long and
The deluge.
for tight boots
successful
reign
Truth is the rival of time
and
the oracle of the future.
How to keep your head clear
Shave every hair off.
"Bolloney Sorseg" is serving at
a Phiiidelphia saloon.
A Schenectady editor wants to
die the mosquitoes are so bad.
The Line of Business some
strong-minded ladies take "up
The mascu-line.
Some reckless fellow defines tip
pling to be holding communion
with disembottled spirits.
The reason why the ancient
Britons were formidable in battle
is that they were Pict men.
Why will folks pay so much for
rent when they can get a house
maid for three or four dollars.
Undertakers are said to be a
mean set alwaws watching for an
opportunity to screw you down.
Twenty-three rattlesnakes al
ready reported from Wisconsin,
with seven counties to hear from.
The way to conmand respect
and plenty of room in a crowd
Carry a pot of paint in each hand.
Piano-making at present takes
the third rank among the manu
facturing interests in the United
States.
Fuji, commenting on the pro
verb, Peace hath her victories,"
says: "Just so! more fall in love
than in war.
"Isn't it strange," remarked a
lady, "the Misses Smith are so
gross?" "Not at all," was the re
ply; their father was a grocer.
Under the head of "Lost Races
ot America", a gentleman is get
ting up a list of the most celebrat
ed horses that have been beaten.
A Maine girl whose lover has
lost a limb, replied to her compan
ions' banter, "I wouldn't have a
man with two legs they're so
common."
An exchange gives an account
of a monkey having picked a man's
pocket of something over a hun
dred dollars. Simply another note
for Darwin, that's all.
At Louisville, Ivy., a few days
go, a man was rendered delirious
y the heat from the sun, while
Ving for four hours on the grave
of his wife, who had recently died.
m i T cv T" t-
lne. jciterson (lowa) ee is
redibly informed that there are
three men now temporarily insane
in the southern part of that coun
ty caused by the excessive use of
tobacco.
The female population of Edin-
mrg exceeds the male by nearly
9,000. In Glascow the excess is
6,000. The excess in these two
cities is about equal to that of the
State of Massachusetts.
A Iloosac tunnel teamster was
ately seen on a 3,500 pound load
of powder, smoking a nine, while
ust behilid was the stage coach
nil of passengers, whose felings
were anything but comfortable.
For fresh wounds in man or
oeast it is claimed that there is
nothing to compare to finely pul
verized earth, to be renewed in a
ouple of hours. It is said to act
ike a charm on such wounds..
How to kill onion grubs: Water
the onions well with lye -water,
run from ashes. The water should
be about half as strong as used for
making soap. After a copious
shower of this lye they gennerally
disappear.
A Clergyman in Pennsylvania
his iust received his salary for six
months services. It consisted ot
ten feet of stove pipe, two papers
ot corn starch, three kegs ot varn
ish, one paper collar, four palm
leaf fans, and two bundles of bed
slats.
A man' in Yonkers has discoyerr
ed a novel arid expeditious method
of raising calves." He takes a
mouse into the Dorcas Society at
his church and lets it loose. All
the ladies jump up on the chairs
and window-sills. The man him
self has been vaccinated, and so of
course he isn t afraid.
Charles Lamb's reverie, during
an attack of fspring fever
"riang work I I wish all the year
Wefe holiday I am sure that indo
lence indefeasible indolence is
the true state of man, and business
the invention of the old teaser,
vhbse interference doomed Adam
to an apron and set him boemg.
A River Eunning up Stream.
The 15th of Jnly will long be
remembered as a gala day for the
inhabitants of Chiengoj " who on
that day enjoyed the curious and
novel spectacle of seeing a river
flow backwards, up against its
stream, and in the course of a few
hours changing forever its course
of centuries. Yet it was not the
novelty of this sight that gladden
ed the hearts of all Chicagoians,
but the prospects of the benefits
to be derived from this novel
rfmanipulation ot the Chicago river
in future. Ihis river, emptying
(formerly) into Lake Michigan,
has for many years been a great
source of annoyance to Chicago,
in consequence of intolerable and
unhealthy odors, caused by the
filth drained into it from the city
sewers, and in 1866 work was
therefore commenced to excavate
the Illinois and Michigan canal to
a sufficient depth to permit of
opening a passage through it to
the head waters of the Illinois
river, with which it communicates
About three million dollars were
expended in the work, and at noon
on July 15th the task was com
pleted, and the workmen ' com
menced cutting through the clay
dam which held back the water of
the Chicago river, at a height of
six feet above the level of the
canal. In about three hours the
dam had been swept entirerly
away, and the water had, fallen
two feet in the i-iver. The dark
yellow water from the clayey bed
of the west branch M as succeeded
by the black and offensive water
of the Chicago river proper, and
on the following day the blue wa
ter from Lake Michigan appeared,
resting for a depth of two feet
upon the denser water of the river.
At last accounts the current of
the river could be plainly distin-
guished running up at the rate
of a mile an hour, and the pre
cincts of Chicago were being rap
idly purified from the offensive
odors which had heretotore ema
nated from the stagnant and filthy
Chicago river. After the dam
was cut, along the line of the
deepened canal the approach of
the water was announced hy a
highly disagreeable smell, as the
accumulated filth from Chicago
was pushed along, to the intense
disgust of all persons living along
its porders : but after the pure
Lake fwaters shall have com:
menced to flow in good earnest,
this nuisance will be abated.
There is now an unbroken water
course between the great lakes of
the north and the Gulf of Mexico.
Any number of figures you may
wish to multiply by 5, will give
the same result if divided by 2 a
much quicker operation; but you
must recollect to annex a cipher to
the answer. Multiply 464 by 5,
and the answer will be 2,320; di
vide the same by 2, and you have
232, and as there is no remainder,
you add a cipher. Now take 359
multiply by 5, the answer is 1,795;
on dividing this by 2, there is 179
and a remainder you therefore
)lace a 5 at the end of the line,
ind the result is again 1,795.
A London watch-maker has con- j
strueted a gold hunting watch,
which, in addition to being atime-
ceper of the utmost precision,
with chronometer adjustments,
compensation balance and cylin
drical spring, exhibits on the dial
)late the following different indica-
tions: rirst, the equation of time:
second, the moon's age: third, the
month of the year; fourth, the day
of the month: in adition to the
hours, minutes, and seconds, as in
ordinary watches.
. a- .
Henry Pead is the fastidious ed
itor of the Martin County Herald.
Upon a late electioneering tour he
slept in a farm house, with two
others in the same bed, and the
next morning the lady of the.house
inquired how they slept! "First
rate," answered orie "I slept be
hind, Bill slept before, and Henry
Pead in the middle." "Did he !"
exclaimed the old lady.
A Connecticut countryman stroll
ing through New London recently,
hand in hand with the rural Phyl
lis, impatient to visit the circus,
exclaimed, upon seeing a bunch of
bananas suspended in front of one
of the fruit stores, "I'll be mowed,
if them ain't the biggest beans I
ever see, Sophrony !"
Mr. Stickerlv, a happy parent in
ni.m rmpd his children "One,
"TwA " "Three," etc., as they
ar-
without regard to sex
Gen.
Two Stickerly was a successful
brigadier during the war between
North and South,
The ladies of Brandon, Miss.,
have "ostracised, some northern
school ma'ams for bathing in the
river with colored gentlemen. So
the spirit of caste is maintained
They always were that way.
For the Ladies
: Divorces are obtained in Mary
land without publicity.. They take
their wives out fishing and lighten
the boat. '
In Wyoming the3 bridegroom
does the fainting and takes the
kissing at the weddings, while the
pnoe whispers, "Lean on me dear-
es
.V )J
English Ritualistic clergyman
want to exclude female voices froni
the choirs of all churches. They
are unwilling to give women any
chants. '
A Memphis belle challenged a
man to marry. He valliantly ac
cepted, and in twenty minutes
there was a wedding. In twenty
days there was a divorce.
""Won't vou take half of this
poor apple said a pretty damsel
"No, I thank you. I prefer a bet
ter half." Eliza blushed, and re
ferred the young man to her papa.
The girls have got a new hobby. -This-time
it is the collection of
different patterns of printed calico.
One in New Hampshire has gath
ered together ,000 different kinds
"My love," said Mrs. MaydupO
to her spouse, on returning from
her drive, "I have had a hair
breadth escape." "Ah," said the
brute, "you were well out of dan-Q
ger if it was the same hair that
you've got on now."
Just before Capt. C. "F, Hall
sailed on his expedition to the Arc
tic regions, he received a small
package marked "not to be opened0
till the ship has reached the Arctic
Sea." By some accident the pack-Q
age received a shock and burst
open, when it was found to be a
can of patent axle grease, accom
panied by a letter in which Capt
Hall was requested to lubricate the
axle of the world if it was discov
ered at the North Pole
A lady writes to a New York
paper to know if it is proper that
is, if it is ladylike to retaliate by
squeezing - back when a man
squeezes her hand. Mr. Editor 0
answers: "Well, you might squeeze
easy, just enough to let him know
that you are not disposed to be
mtan about it. But don't turn
round and ask him, 'How is that for
high ?' or he might think you too
forward.
An apothecary's boy was lately
sent to leave at a house a box of
pills, and at another six live fowls'.
Confused oh the way he left the
pills where the fowls should have
gone, and the fowls at the pill
place. , The folks Who received the
fowls weie astonished at reading
the accompanying, directions:
"Swallow one every two hours." .
There may be something in a
name, for the very polite Bostpn
papers call their foundling asylum
a "refuge for anonymous infants,"
while Chicago, with the most finr
isheil etiquette, announces a
"ranche for. babies born on the
European plan." , '
.
Laurel oil is said to exterminate
house flies. Also, that a smoke
produced by burning dried pump
kin leaves will clear them out.
The latter will also relieve one of
any further trouble in taking care
of canary birds and pets of that
character. ..... . , ,
m
An Australian gentleman, exam
ining a mining claim, was seized,
stripped and covered with tar and
wool. ..He went and got himself
photographed in this guise, and
sued his assistants for 2,000 dam
ages, putting in his picture as evi
dence. ...... &
. . . . ,
Dr. Hall has witten a long arti
cle to prove that it is unhealthy
for man and wife to sleep in the
same room, but we know of some
wives that would make it unhealthy
for their husbands to sleep any
where else.
Dufferton (who is a good ehot)
"WTell, I could have sworn I hit
the 'bull' that time." Officer in
charge (having a look through his
o-l-xss) "No; but very near. You
have killed the cow in the field td
left !"
"Whiskey is your greatest ene
my." "But," said Mr. Jones;
"don't the Bible say, Mr. Preacher,
that we are to love our tehemies ?"
"O, yes, Jones; but it don4t say we
are to swallow them.
A San Francisco mineralogist is
said to have discovered a method
by which a substance harder than
steel can be made by amalgamat
ing iron and copper.
More accidents occur in hotels
from children sliding on the balus
ters than from all other causes
combined.
. .
There is a printer in Pennsyl
vania, who has lost his right ana,
and now sets type with his .left
hand.
o
o
o
G
G
O
O
O
o
o
o
0
o
Q O
o
fie
-rrrr.T OAT TO'QMTA