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THERE art a few fact about
' punishment that mothers should
know, and I want to tell them.
They are gathered from the
opinion of medical authorities, men
whose works every mother does not
have time to read, while I am In a po
sition to hear many things not pub
lished broadcast.
You know. In the first place, that chil
dren have no fear; that the sensation
they afterward feel, on being fright
ened. Is an acquired thing. Implanted In
their minds by those whp have them In
charge. It would surely never occur to
any child to fear a policeman or the
dark. Such thoughts are suggested by
motheis and nurses, and In doing this
they destroy the perfect trustfulness of
the baby mind, on of the chief charms
of childhood.
I always think that o many trouble
and responsibilities come to the average
person, after he or she Is grown, that
the little pleasures of childhood should
be Increased, If possible, so .the individ
ual may. at least carry pleasant mem
ories through all of life. 1 , am eure
h fn tht rood mothers will agree
f with me. They know that any sacrifice
- la rsnaM ten thousandfold
tui m v- "
In love. They also know that every one
should have a chance to develop, and
that whatever necessary punishment Is
administered should be perfectly harm
less, something that will Impress the
incident on the memory, but will work
no lasting harm either to mind or body.
EARLY DISCIPLINE
The first twelve years of a child's life
are abnormal. It Is then that the bear
lag Is generally keen, and that the
memory retains lasting Impressions.
Pvery one knows that a child of three
will have learned a whole language In a
year; a feat that may not be equaled
by any older person. It Is at this time,
then, that the infant mind should not b
unduly excited, either by Joy or sorrow,
that the greatest care must be taken
so that mental and physical growth will
be unimpeded.' .
But as the child may not at first be
able to distinguish between right and
wrong, it seems necessary that some
punishment be devised, and It Is said ,
that the omly one that will not Injure
the child Is the old-fashioned, but ef
fective, spanking. Not with a slipper,
however, as mother cannot tell how
rnuch she may be hurting. The best
way is not old-fashioned, but new-fashioned
a rolled-up newspaper, which, au
thorities ay, Is the Ideal spanksr. It
cannot hurt too much, yet it has the
very best effect. Of course, there are
. other punishments that exactly fit the
crime, and are therefore very sensible.
These are numerous and must be
thought of by the mother herself.
In the first place, never pull a child by
the ear. The eardrum is very delicate
even later In life. With a child such
treatment may result In permanent
deafness. Would any mother wish such
a catastrophe T
Do not shake a child. The little bones
are springy and easily misplaced, and
the agitation naturally is confusing. By
the time any one has gone through a
thorough shaking h 1 unable to reason.
Try It yourself and sea. -
CHILDREN'S NERVES
km fntnw nt the nerves am altu&iiu. tit
the center of the back between the
shoulder blades, do not push children In
U11S nay 1 UMKca iuviu uci uua,
van If it does not overbalance them and
cause a fall, .?ou may think that you
are using very little force, that it could
not possibly be even felt. - Try running
against a chair or a door In the dark
and sea how much muscle you us even
when cautiously crossing the room.
- This will help you. better to understand
. my argument' .
Of course, boxing the tars Is Just as
ijiarmful as nulling them; In fact. It 1
far mora ad, for the sudden concussion
of air on the eardrum has caused many
-t a case of deafness. However, this Is a
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form of punishment that has happily
almost gone out of fashion.
And last of all comes the almost in
human practice of shutting a baby In
the dark closet. In doing this you Im
plant the germ of fear In the heart of a
Th$ Triali of a Debutante
IOFTEJ think of the little girls who
' are thlr year to make their first bow
to society. The world seems so
large, and their little Uvea have, up to
the moment of the tlrst party, been so
small, that it seems remarkable they get
along as welt as they do. Even the
wisest are sure to And many thing they
ara not prepared for. To help them, I
am going to mention a few rules which
she who wishes to be a success must
bear in mind. In the first place, touch,
no wine. That is the one. unbreakable
law for . tha first-year girl No matter
how formal the dinner, how many wines
ara offered and how many of the other
women present Ignore the rule, do not
touch your wine. If you even pretend
to drink It. harm Is done. As well drink
all the wine on the table as touch your
lips to the brim of your .glass. . After
ward, IflVou mi'", the ather guests,
. or. at leist. oh of them, will say : "See
how hllaVlous a little wine make Miss ,
Robinson. Is not it a pity h doe not
know any better V- .- - -r-
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THE OREGON; SUNDAY ' JOURNAL; PORTLAND SUNDAY HORNING, NOVEMBER 15, 1908
Cj ONGEliNING
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little child. Once planted, you take
away the spirit of Independence and
make a poor fearful thing that is un
able to face the crises of life. Further
more, children thus treated work them
selves Into a nervous state, unless they
If you are very quiet, the one busy
body will surely remark: "How strange
ly a little wins affects that poor glrL I
should think she would never want to
touch It."
Your second year you may do as you
like, but at first you are supposedly
merely ingenue. Keep that In mind. It
Is the same in every city of the country.
In every little town.
At entertainments always be particu
larly nice to your hostesses and all the
older women present Remember, your
Invitations are not sent out by the men.
-nor even by your girl friends. The moth
ers, aunts. ' sisters and cousins are tha
people upon whom you must depend.
Never did a girl have a good time who
gelled only upon her men friends to
help her, out Cultivate every one you
meet, no matter who she Is or how
aged she may seem to you, and your
way will be paved with roses.
Never be too busy to answer your ln
.vltationa promptly, to pay yonT party
calls and to write little notes of thanks
when necessary. Tour time may be full,
but these are details that it would be
the greatest mistake to neglect - Tou
' cannot see this now, but you will when
you are1 hostess yourself.
Always arrive on tiro at luncheons or
dinners. These two entertainments are
the only one where promptness 1
aentlal. although the same rule applies
to card parties. As debutantes seldom
re entertained In this way. however,
w need not take them much Into con
sideration. By being prompt I do not
Ml
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Health
By MRS JiLNRY SYMES
HILDREN
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are very phlegmatic, that it takes days
to Overcome. Why do children not suffer
from nervous prostration? Have you
thought of that ? Do you net think that
there may be many such cases started In
childhood? Is it not possible that many
mean that you shall arrive ahead of
time. The Ideal dinner guest reaches
the house Just five minutes before tha.
hour mentioned in the Invitation. This
leaves Just a moment to allot eawh
woman to her partner and to enter the
dining room at the right second." If the
guests arrive early the situation often
becomes strained, an atmosphere that
the good hostess Is quick to feeL .
SELF-CONTROL A NECESSITY
There Is much to say on the subject
of the entertainments themselves. At
luncheons be nice to all the girls. If
there are only girls present If you are
seated beside your particular esemy, do
not let the fact either spoil your time or
hers. It is your duty to your hostess to
do your part toward making the occa
sion one of pleasure. Leave all your
personal affairs on the doorstep and all
your likes and dislikes In camphor In
7 ths cedar chest up In the ettio at home.
Tou have no use for such things in your
debutante year.
After luncheon do not break up the par
ty to attend some other entertainment;
even though you are really pressed for
time. It 1 your, duty to make yourself
agreeable. It i not of eoure. neces
sary to remain the whole afternoon, but
urely Vh1 noup niay. be apared from
the . day of . pleasure to repay your .
liT-.hesteesvJ - s
j juiy." seen glrla leave during- the
I luncheon, ometimea in the middle, to
rush home to dress for some other en.
BBrBeBsaasBF''W
and Beauty
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children suffer from nerves, although
too young to be abl to correctly de
scribe their sensation? Is not a fear
less man or woman an Individual to be
admired and envied? I know you will
all agree with me.
tertainment This was not showing or
dinary courtesy. If you accept an in
vitation to a luncheon, at a certain
hour, it la only proper that you should
stay until It is over. The second en
tertainment will come In its turn. No
hostess who plans a dainty meal for
her guests likes to see them all or any
one of them alight It to accept the hos
pitality of some one els.
I would like all my friends to write to
me on this subject I think it would
be an interesting points dlscussT
If you attend a dinner before the
theater do net fidget in your seat and
express in a loud voice your wish that
dinner were over, that you "wish to see
the first act" When you are In an
other person's house you are entirely In
her hands. If she wishes to buy a box
at the theater and then keep her guests
at dinner until the show is over, she
only does It because It Is her Idea of
giving her guests a good time. If you
are not enjoying the . dinner tt Is prob
ably your own fault for a number of
young people can always manage to
enjoy themselves. '
If at a dance you are not aa popular
as you hoped to be, do not make the.
fast obvious. Tou may gO home If you
are aot a belle, but do not repine. If
yon are a belle, do-not be afraid to
share your partners with- other less
fortunate girls. Buch genstpsity will
insure your popularity in future. It
Is in a way a self protection.
And. last of att, dO not discus yen
hostesses or past entertainment with
OPA
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MRS. SYMES'
OWING to the large amount of
mail received and the limited
space given this department,
it Is absolutely Impossible to
answer letters In the (Sunday Issue fol
lowing their receipt The letters must
be answered in turn, and this ofttlmes
requires three or four weeks.
All correspondents who desire an Im
mediate answer must inclose a self-addressed
stamped envelope- for a reply.
This rule must also be complied with
In regard to personal letters.
Too Young for Cosmetics
Would you kindly advlae me whst to do
In a cim when th skin -t..b
drying up an becoming; parenedl I nave
UMd cold cem and only the .best of face
powder, but It em my akin Is orylng
up. and I am only 51 years old. but It
irema tp be wrinkling. I maisace my
face every nlsht with cold cream, but
all to no avail. I always use the cream
before putting powder on
If you are trying to keep your akin
from becoming dry I advise you not
to use powder on it. Keep on using cold
cream and wash your face In the morn
ing with cold wateF-not hot. Do not
massage your face merely rub the
cream well Into the skin.
Request for Names
1 wish to know If you could tell me
of any epeclallet in this city who alters
defects and laaprpvee one's features. I
have) been told that there la one In this
city who perform the operation In a very
elmola manner with a One paraffins
needle. I have a very lar Roman noee,
with a dliflcurlnK scar on the bridge, and
It la for this reaeon I am anxious to se
cura the Information asked for above.
c ANXIOUS.
I am very sorry, but I am unable to
give any names or addresses In this
column or through private letter, so I
cannot recommend any specialist to
you. However. I am sure that if you
go to a reputable doctor he will give
you the name of a specialist for you
to consult.
The Useful Peroxide
Will you please tell me If peroxide of
hydrogen will bleach the akin and super
fluous hair; also If It will stop the growth,
of hair. m M. U K.
I am giving you a formula for face
bleach which I think will whiten your
skin and also bleach the superfluous
hair I do not think, however, it will
your friends, unless you make It a rule
to say nothing but what is nice and
kind. It is an old rule of the Arabs
to say only good things of people whose
salt they have eaten, and surely, no mat
ter how great the provocation, you may
be as good as an Arab. Every disagree
able thing you say will surely find it
way back to the person you have been
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PERPLEXITIES SOLVED
A Lonely Girl
I TRAVEL abroad a great deal with my
father. Wben he goes out 1 am left
alone m the hotel and feel very lonely.
Could I talk to the other rPjeOTJiot
I do not see any reason why you
should not talk to women whom you
meet but 1 Bboull not attempt to ad
dresi a man. if you make the ac
ouaintance of one woman In the notei
Tchances are she will Introduce you
to more, and then you will not be bo
lonely.
Between Dances
Is It the fashion to walk around the
ballroom with your partner orroO
It ts all right to walk around theben
room with your partner until the begin
ning of the next dance. It is better,
however for the lady to suggest that
he7 oartner take her back to ber Chap
Sron? ita an important I"" that
a girl should not dance twice In succes
sion with the same man. Always re
turn to the chaperon after every dance.
Mystic Symbols
rvh.t dnR. 9. V, P. nieant X know
It is u.M m a.t that an. answer to an
InvSatlo "WAlii & W
what It means. WANTS TO Knuw,
The Initials R. 6V V. P. are used to
Indicate the Vrinfth jphras. "Kespon
"iesviTavou plalW?. The French people
eSTomTi of course, use the abbreviate
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ANSWERS
prevent the hair from growing. Un
less the growth la very bad I advlaa yon
not to touch it.
Liquid "Whitenex.
Water (previously balled and ,
strained) J; 5"f
Alcohol -.... drops
Oxide of slno .-..
Bichloride of mercury fr1""
Olyoerlne ....- droJ
Keep the solution out of the way ot sau
Cure for Bunion - -
I have a very bad bunion. - Csa yea
(fre me something to cure "'jtc.
I am giving you the best wnulj
have for bunion cure. I think It WlU
be beneficial. ,
Bunion Cure.
carbollo acid... J J&JJJ!
IMS'.0' ,.?a.ln.,:.-.:-.:v-.:"r. i SSio SSS.
Apy with a ciuners-W brush dally.
Walnut Hair Stain , :
Will you kindly rive me tt
walnut hair stain, and oblige KLYRIA. ,
I am giving you the recipa for thj
walnut hair stafn. Apply It to the hair
with a small brush.
Walnut Stain for Hair.
Four ounces of walnut skin. ta-a
palp, to which 1 added pure alcohol. M
UUe?atasd eight days and strata.
Eyebrow? and Hands
Lately I applied olive otl'and vaseUs t
mv eyelashes and brows to nuvka then
grow I must have let It run tout too far.
for It has caused the hair to stow long
over my nose. Kindly tell how to remove
them. Idy hands are very fleshy and my
lucklefW lTT
I am very eorry that I cannot suggest
snv way to remove the hair which ha
grown over the bridge of your nose,
exeept to pull the hairs out, If you
use a depilatory in such a place the
result would be a growth- of very atlft
hair which would look far worsa than
the first. If. however, ycro pull the
hairs out once in a whlla you will soon
decrease their growth, - and It will not
hni-r vera much.
I do not know what to tell you to re
duce your hands. They seem to be born,
not made, and If you keep them in good
condition and keep tha skin soft by tha
application of cold cream I do not think
you can do any more to improve their
look. v:;r;.
talking of. and It will do you Incalcu
lable Injury. If you do not care to ae
cept an invitation, decline it, but dis
cuss with no one your reasons for do
ing so. If you have accepted) hospital
lty of any one. speak only good things
of your bensfactor.
Only girU who follow these, rul
become popular. ' j ;
form, and a great many people frv this
country are;, particular about having
the entire phrase spelt out or else hav
ing printed at ths foot of the- tnvlta
tlon. "An early reply la requeued." On
the whole. I think this Is a very good
Idea. When we have English words
there is no reason why we should rely
upon the French.
Inviting the Clergyman,
Who Invites the derg-yaian
to tierfrvrae
ins weaawg ceremony 7 .
FRANK r.
It is usually the bridegroom's duty to
secure the services of the clergyman the
moment the wedding day 1 decided
upon, and, unless he. live at a great dis
tance, the bridegroom "should call per
sonally and engage htm. . If, however,
the clergyman la a friend of both bride
and bridegroom- -it-would It eourtvoue
for them both to call together and as
him to marry thenu ' - - ,
Party Calls
Wh too klhdlr tell at If a cell is n
airy after a tea or a reutrtt-mT
. VV.;..A-' -ONiJRAMV.
- If you have attndid he ersWtu
meat It I not necry to ta,i. . r
"the invitation U really Jjm at-
- tor a woman' friends to f , ,
! only two mrtaitimtiv,a , ,,
'procedure is allowabni. .' ' .
sen,- a card party, a w .;
or any aueti air a i u t-.l u ,
ry.
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