."- THE OIJECON SUNDAY1" JCUr-NAL. PORTLAND. SUNDAY i:0IIING, JULY 3,
- ' ... '
rC'dwseAtish' a- Alsslaa tase. el
a. M North Rampart Itmfc
nil da. I Mt Ciaaoy. whose I bad
,' , Jr. Mot Man la months. Clancy la
-..a .Amvlota. with -aa Irish
dlstheels and cosmopolitan proclivities.
Many builMMM have claimed him. but
bob for low.. TWrnllUfi Mood U
He greeted mo with heartiness, and
. X thought I jt something In hta or
that ooafet-CO bo-aivvlr. SoaaeUn
4 whoa Clancy baa returned from . his
' voyage Into ' the Informal and the
gregtoua, ho can bo persuaded to oral
oanatruotio, . Mow I thought I caw- ta
. him symptom of voluntary - discourse,
s I hastily convoyed him to a llttlo
. oaf near by, wharo a fan bussed, mtti-
gating tho torrid aftrlaoM of the Kow
Orlaana umme- - v ' . ''".''.'"
I"TU Tory noai too troptoa, thla
; weather, today., said ' Clancy apropos
'. I thouaht of th season. B tt ap
peared, tt had moro to do with hi
. atory. X nodded eonflrmatorlly, -
' Tm f- olegant t waathor," - continued
Ctancr. "for filibustering- " Tls what
I"v boon doln' for 4w ' most ha put,
axnunrlla' ta liberate a forelan aeonle
from y tyrant's clutch, 'Tvu hard
work. ?Tt strainta' toth back and
row corns on your .hand'.
"S. I said, "you'vs turned aoldler
ot fortune lar earnest , J hopo yoa mada
tt pay. To what oouatry did yoa land
ywur aldf - " - -' (' "-
"Wherea Xamchatkar, naked Clan ay.
Irrelevantly, I thought -"Why,
oft Slbsria, bp la tho Arctic
Mgtasa, ,1 believe," I aaawered, lonf
what doubtfully. , '- .-.-'
"X thought that was tho eold tea. "J
Hid Cumoy. with a. nod. . Tr. eJwaye
awttta tho 'two nam as mixed. Twi
Goatem, than tho hot on Iv boo
fUlbostaria' wit. TCU find that oown
try oa tho map. - Tls la tho district
known aa tho tropica. By tho foresight
ad prorldanoo, It llaa oa tho eoast a tho
awugiaphy maa could run tho name of
tho towns off into tho water. . Tbayro
aa baea long, a mall typo, eampaaad of
Spanish dlaloets. and-.tla my oplnloo
of th oama ayatosa of ayataa that blow
vs tho htalno. Taa, Hwaa that ooaatrr
X oallod aaainat. alnvlo-haadod. aad ow
doarorod to Ubarat It from a tyrannical
ovontmont with a ataflo-barrolod pleh
ac. vanadoi at that . Ta don't adar
otaad, of oooroa. 'Tls a atatamaat do
aiaadta aluaUUtlOn and apologioa.
"Twaa oao mornlnr aboat tho first
of Jnno; I was atandlD down oa tho
wharf, look to about at tho ships la tho
rrrar. - Thar was a uiua ftaamor
moorad right Op po alto mo that saamad
aheat roady to oalL Tho fuaaals of It
won throw la' out amoko. aad a aa
rooatabonta woro oarryln' aboard a pllo
of boaaa that waa a tack ad p oa tha
wharf. Tho boaos woro aboat two foot
oquaro, and soraathln' llks four foot
hwr and thav aaamail ta ba wrattv
boayy.
r T walkad erar, earalaoa. ta tho ataok
of boaaa. X saw ono of thorn bad boom
brokoa ta handlla'. Twaa ourtoatty
uado ma poll up tho loooo top aad look
lamdo. Tho box waa paekod full of
Wlaehoatar rlfloa.. So, so,'' say a I to
nyaolf : aomobodya aottta' a twist oa
tho aoutrallty laws.- tomabodya atdla'
with mualtloao of war. .. X woador. whoro
1 board somebody -sough, aad X
tarnod . around. Thoro stood a little,
round, fat man with a brown faeo and
whlto olotboa, a flrst-elasa looking little
man. with a fouroarat diamond oa hi
ftngor and hla era fall of tnterrontlona
aad- rospaeta.1 Mdgad ho was a kind
o taiwifuwv aaaypo rrom . Jiusaia or
Japaa or tho archipelagoes..
."Hlstr aaya tho round man, full of
eoaooalmonta and confidence "Will tha
aoaor reapoat tho dlaoorarynants ba
haa mada, that tho mans oa tho ahlp
ban not bo acquaint? Tho aoaor will
bo a gontlomaa thai shall not expose
oao thiag that by accident oocvir.'
laonsoor.' aaya I for X Judged hla
to bo a kind of frenchman, that aa
oortmoat of forolgnora being doomed by
nature to politeness aad dialects re
earoa air aaoat exasperated eeouranoee
hat your aoerot la safe with . James
Clancy. Farthormoro, X will go so far
aa to remark. Veer la Liberty Tee? H
good and strong. Whenever you hoar
of a Clancy obstructla' tho abolishment
of exlstla' gorernmaata you may notify
om by rotura mall'
"The eeaor U good,' say tho dark,
fat mas, a Ilia' under his black mna
taebo. "Wish you to oomo aboard my
ahlB and arlak af a win a alaaaw
"Bala' a Clancy,, ta two mlrfutes ma
aad tho foroiga maa wars aoatod at a
table ta tho oabla of tha ateamar with
a bottle betwoea ua, I aould hoar tha
hoary boxee bela dumptd tat tho hold.
X Judged that eargo must aonalst of at
least t,tO 7lnshostaTa. Mo and tha
browa maa drank tha bottle of stuff,
aad ho called tho steward to bring an
uthor. Whca yoa amalgamsto a Clancy
with tho eon ten ta of a bottle you prac
tically Instigate socoosfoa. X bad heard
a good deal about these rarolutlons la
them tropical climates, and I began to
want a hand In It.
. Ton gotn' to stir things up In your
country, ain't you, monaoerr says I
with a wink to 1st him kaow I waa on.
"Tea. yoa,' says the little man,
pounding his flats oa tha table. 'A
ehaago ot tho greatest will occur. Too
long have the people booa oppressed
with tho promises and (ha neTtr-to-happen
things to boooma. Tha great work
It shall bo carry on. Tea. Oar forces
ah all la the capital city strike of the
soonest. Carramboor ,
" Carrambos Is tbs word.' says X. be
ginning to Invest myself with enthusi
asms and - more wine, 'likewise, veer,
as I said before. May the shamrock f
old I mean the banana viae or the pie
plant,' or whatever the Imperial ambleta
may bo of your down-trodden oouatry.
wave forever.'
" "A thousand thank-yous,' aaya tho
round man. for your omission of amic
able utterances. What our cause needs
of tho rery most la mans who will tha
work do, to lift It along. Oh, for one
thousands strong, good mans to aid tba
General Do Vega that ho snail ta his
eountr bring those suooess and glory)
It to bard oh, so hard to find good
man ta help In tho work.'
- Moosaer.' aaya I. leanln' oyer the
table ' and graspln' hla hand. 1 don't
know wharo your country la, but mo
heart , blooda for it. The heart of a
Clancy waa never -deaf to the sight of
an oppressed paopia Tha family 4m. tM
bnataroro by . birth, and foreigners by
trad a If yoa can use Jamee Clancy
arm aad bla blood la denudln' your
shores of tho tyrant'a yoke they're yours
to command.' . - .
X)noral Do Vega waa wrorcome with
1mt to eoaflaeata my condolence of his
conspiracies aad predicaments. He
tried ta embrace mo serosa tho table,
but kia fatness, and tha wins that waa
not la tho bottles, prevented. Thus waa
X welcomed trite tho ranks of flllbua
tery. Then the general maa told me
bis oouatry bad tho name of Oust em a la,
aad waa tho greatest nation laved by
any ocean whatever,- anywharc lie
looked at mo with tears la hla eyes, and
from time to time ho would omit the
remark, 'Ah! big, strong, brave mans!
That Is what my country need.' .
"Oenaral Xo Vega,' as was'ths name
by which he denounced himself, brought
out a document for mo ta sign, which I
did, makin' a fine flourish and surlyaue
with' tha tail of tho '
Tour paasago money,' says tha gen
eral; businesslike, baU from your pay
i deduct.'- . - : ., . 'i :
""TwiU not,' aaya X. baugnty. TH
pay ny own paseage.' A hundred and
eighty dollara X had In my Inside pocket,
aad 'twaa no common filibuster I waa
gola to bo, filibuster!!)' for ma board
aad cloths,' , : ... - ... . ...
"Tba ateamar waa to saO la two hours,
and X wsnt ashore to got oomo things
toaether I'd need. 'When I-came aboard
I ehowed rha , geotrai, with pride, , tho
a? AoahTad!!
fP'ii-V.I 7,rAhJ!l'!?P-?"f,!
muffs, with elegant fleeoe-tlned gloves
and. woolen muffler, i . '.' .
" Varrambool' aaya tho little general
'What clothes are these that shall go to
tho tropler And than tho little spal
peen laughs, and bo ealla tha captain.
and the captain calls ths purser, and
they plpo up the chief engineer, and ths
whole gang leans against tha cabin and
laughad t Clancy's wardrobe for Guate
mala. '-.,
"I re f! acta a bit, serious, and aska the
general again to dominate tha terms by
which bla country la called. ,He tolls
mo, and I sec than that twaa tha t'other
one, Kamchatka, I had la mind. Since
then I've had difficulty ta aoparatln'
tho two aationa la aamo, climate and
geographic disposition.
"I paid my passage - lit, flret aabla
ata at tanie win th officer
d. Dow a on th lower dock was
a gang of aoooad-olass passengers, about
4 of taam, seemla' to bo Dagoes and
tha Ilk. X wondered what a many of
taont ware goln along for.
"Well, than., la -three aaya ws sailed
alongside that Ouatemala, .Twas a bin
oouatry, and not yellow, aa 'tis mls
oolorod on th map. We landed at a
town aa th coast where a train of care
waa waitla' for a dinky little railroad.
Th bone an th steamer .war brought
ashor and loaded oat th care. The
gang of Dagoes got aboard, too. the
general and mo In tho front car. Tea,
ma aad Oeaoral Do Voga headed the
revolution, as It pulled out of the sea
port town. That train traveled about as
faat as a policeman goln" to a riot. It
psnstrated too moot conspicuous lot f
fussy scenery oyer seen out aide a geog
raphy. Wo run aonfa to miles In seren
hours aad the ' train stopped. - There
waa no more railroad. Twaa a sort of
camp In a damp gorge full Of .wlldnese
aad melancholies. They wss gredln'
and ehoppln' out the forests ahead to
continue th - road. Hare.' says I To
myself. Is th romantic haunt of the
revolutlonlsta - Hero will Clancy, by
tho virtue that la in. a superior race,
strike a tremendous blow for liberty.'
"Thar unloaded r the bozos from ths
train And begun to knock th top off.
Prom tho first ono that was opened I
saw General D Vega take tho Win
chester rifles and pass them around to
a scmsd of morbid, sore-toed soldiery.
Th other bozo were opened neat, and.
believe me or not. divii another goa
waa to be seen. Every ether box m the
lot wss full of pickax aa and spsdas.
'And then orrow be upon them
tropics the proud Clancy and tho dis
honored Dagoes, each; one of them, bad
t ahoulder .a pick or a spade, and
march away to work oa that dirty little
railroad, Tes: 'tweav that th ruiiras-
terln Clancy signed for, though unbw
knownst to himself at the time. In
after daya I found out about it It
seem 'twaa hard to gat hands to work
on that road. Th Intelligent natives
of the country was too lasy to work.
Indeed,, the saint kno W.'twas .unnecea.
aary.' 6y stretchln' out ono hand, they
could seise the most delicate -sad costly
fruits of th earth, and, by strstchta out
the other, tbey could sloop for day at a
time without heertn a T o'clock whistle
or tha footstepe of tho rent man upoa
th stair. - Bo,-regular, the a taam era
traveled ' the United states to a educe
labor. Usually ths 'Imported "spade
allnger died In two or thro months
from-eatln' the over-rip water land
breatbln' the violent tropical scenery.
Wherefore, they made them alga con
tract for a year when they hired them,
and put an armed guard ever th poor
devils to keep them from runnln' away.
"'Twas thus I was double-crossed by
the tropica through a family fallla of
gola ;out ot tha way to hunt disturb
ances. .
' "They gave me a pick, and I took It,
medlmtln'aa Insurrection en the spot;
but there was fb guards nandUa' th
'; .- :'?';-
Tha Box Wag Packed
Winchester ear lass, and X oom to th
conclusion that discretion waa th beat
part of f Ulbaatorta'. . Thar waa about
ltt f us ta th gang a tar tin out to
work, and tha word waa glvea to move.
X atopa oat of th ranka and toe up
to that General Da Vega man, who waa
smokln a elgar and gaaln' upon . tho
scene with aatlaf aationa and glory. He
amlle at at polite and davlllsn. "Plenty
work,-aayg ba, for big, strong inaaa in
Guatemala. Tea. . Tirty dollar In- the
month. Good pay. Ah, ye. Ton strong,
brave man, Bimaby wo push thoao rail
road la th capital very quick, Tbey
want you g work w, Adlosjtroug
" -Mrs X, Unirrtn you
n a poor little Irish man thiar - Wbsa
mana.
I sot foot aa your oockroashy ateamar,
and breathed liberal ana revolutionary
aentlmoato Into your our' wine, did you
think I waa aonaptrla' to sling a pick
your ooatomptuou Uttl railroad T
And when yoa anaworod mo with patri
otic roottatlona, humping ap th star
spangled oauso of liberty, did yoa bar
meditation of rodueta me to tho ranks
of th tump-grubbta - Dagssa ta th
chain gangs f your Vila and groveiln'
ountryr . , .
"The ganeral maa expanded hla ro
tundity aad laughed eonsldsrabl. Tea,
ho laughed very long and loud, and I.
Clancy, stood snd waited. .
- Comloal maasr ho ahouta, at last
"Bo you wnl kill m front th laughing.
Tesi U la bard to find th bravo, at rang
mana to aid asy country. Revolutions?
Did X apeak of r-r-revolutlonaT . Mot
en ward. X aay, big. strong man la
seed la Guatemala. . Tha aniatske
la f yoa. Ton have looked In those
on box obtaining' thoao gun for tho
guard. Ton think all boxes la contain
guat tNr ao. There I not war In
Ouatemala, But work Tea. Good.
Ttrty dollar in th month. Ton shall
shoulder on pickax, eenor, and dig for
th liberty and prosperity ef Guatemala.
Off to your work, Th guard wait for
you.''
" Tittle, fat, poodl dog of a brawn
man,' says I, quiet, but full of indigna
tions and discomforts, thing shall hap
pen to you. . Maybe not right away, but
aa soon aa J. Clancy oaa formulate
somethln' la th way of repartee.'
"The boos of the gang orders u to
work. I tramp off with th Guinea,
and I bears th distinguished -patriot
aad kidnaper laughln. hearty, as w go.
"Tls a worrowful fact, for eight
week I built railroads for that misbe
bavln country. I filibustered 11 hours
a day with a heavy pick and a spade,
ehoppln' away th luxurious landscape
that grow upon th right of way. Wo
worked In swamps that am ailed llks
there waa a leak In tho gas mains,
trampln' down a fine assortment of the
most expensive hothouse plant and
vegetable. Th seen was tropical be
yond tho wildcat Imagination of th
geography man. Tho tree waa all sky
scrapers; th underbrush was full of
needle and pins: there waa monkeys
Jompln around and crocodile and pink
tailed mockin' birds, and y stood knse
deep ta the rotten water and . grabbled
roots for th liberation of Guatemala.
Of night w would build emudgas In
camp to discourage tho mosquito, and
alt In tha amoko, wttw tho guards pacln'
all around a . Thar waa too men
workin' ' on tho road mostly . Guineas,
nigger-men. Spanlsh-msn - and. wades.
Three or four wer Irish.
"On old man named Halloran a man
of Hibernian entitlements and discre
tions, explained It to ma H bad been
workin' on the road a year. Most or
them died In loo than six month He
wss rll up to gTtotW an bor;.aniI
shook with chills every third night
"When you first come,' says he, yc
think yCll leave right away. But they
hold out your first month's pay for your
passsgo over, and by that time th trop
ics haa Ita grip on y. Te're surround
ed by a rat-in' forest full of dlsreputahio
beasts lions and baboon and anacon
da wattln' to devour ye. - The sun
strike y hard and melt th marrow
la your, bone To get similar to ths
Uttuoe-caters the poetry book sposks
about.' ' To forget th elevated alntt
menu of life, aueh aa patriotism, re
venge, disturbance ef th peace and
th dadnt love of a clone shirt- To do
your work, and ye swallow ths kerosene
II and rubber plpestems-dlshod np to
ye by th Dag cook for food. T Jtght
your pipeful and say to yourself. "Nlxt
week I'll break away," and y go to
sleep and call ysrallf a liar, for ya know
ye u never a it.
Full of Wlnchastgr Rlfloa.
"Who Is thl general maa.' asks I
thai ealla almsolf D Vegar
"Tie th man,' aaya HaMoraa, wa
la try-In to eomplst th nnlshln' ot th
railroad. Twaa tho project of a private
corporation, but It buated. and then ths
government took it up. Do Vagy la a
big politician and. wants to b president
Tha people want ths railroad completed,
as they're taxed mighty on account f It
Th Do Yegy man la pushln' It along a
a cam palga. move.'
' 'Tls not my way, aaya X, to make
threats against any man. but there's an
account to -bo aattlod betwoea the rail
road man and James CDowd Clancy.'
-Two that way I thought, meellf.
t Brtt, Halloran aaya. with a big alga,
until I got to bo a lettuce-eater. Th
fault's wtd these tropica. They rejuleee
a man's aystsm. Tls a land, a th
poet says, '"where It always seem to
be after dinner." I doe m work and
smokes as pip and sleep. Thsra's lit
Ito else la life, anyway. Tell get that
way yerseM, mighty soon. . .Don't be
harborin' any stntlmonta at alt, Clancy.'
1 can't help it,' any X. Tn full of
'am. I enlisted In the revolutionary
army of thla dark country in good faith
to light for Its liberty, honor and silver
candlesticks; Instead of which I am set
to am pu tat In' Its scenery aad grubbia'
Ita roots. Tie th general man will have
to pay for It
Two month X worked that rail
road before I found a ehaaoe to get
away. One day a gang of u waa sent
back to the end of th completed Mn to
fetch some picks that bad been sent
down- to Port Bar r loo to be sharpened.
Tbey wer brought oa a handcar and I
noticed, whs we started away, that the
ear was left on the track.
That night, about If, I woke ap B
toran and told him my schema. .. .
" 'Run awayr aaya Halloran. Good
Lord. Clancy,' do yo moan rtf Why, 1
ain't got tho aarve. It's too ohtlly, and
I ain't slept enough. Bun swart . I
told you. Clancy, I've -eat the lettuce.
I've loot my grip. . Tt th tropic that's
done it 'Tls Ilka th poet say! "jror.
gottoa ar sur friends that we have left
behind; ta the hollow Httuce-iand - we
will 11 v and Uy reclined." Ton better
goa on. Clancy, ru stay, I guess. Ire
too early and cold, and rm sleepy.'
I had to - leave Halloran. I
dressed quiet and sltppsd out Of tho tent
wo wer in. When th guard oama
along I knocked him over, like a nlne
pln. with a green ooeoanut I had, and
made for the railroad. X got on that
handcar and mada It fly. Twaa yst a
while before daybreak whoa I saw the
llghta ef Port Barrloo about a mile
away. X stopped the' handcar there and
walked to the town. I stepped Inslds
ths corporations of that town with cars
and hesitation I was not afraid of the
army of Guatemala, but my aoul quaked
t the proepcet of a hand-to-hand strug
gle with its wmployment bureau. Tls
a country, that hire It help easy and.
keep 'em long. Sure, X can fancy
Missis America and Missis Guatemala
pa sain' a bit of gossip soms fin, still
night acres th mountains." Ob, dear,'
say Misala America, and It's a lot of
trouble I'm bavin' agla with th help,
senora, ma'am.' Taws, nowT - nays
Missis Guatemala. you - don't aay mo,
ma'am! Now, mine never think of
leavln' mo t-he! ma'am,', snickers
Missis Guatemala. "
. T was wonderin' how 1 was goln' to
tnov away from them tropica without
bain hired again. Dark a It was. I
could see a steamer lid In' in tho har
bor, with tho smoke smsrgtn' from her
stacks, I turned- down- a-tlttla grassy
street that run down to th water. On
the beach I found a llttlo brown nigger
man Just about to ahovs off In a akin.
" "Hold on. Bam bo," aaya I, 'savvy
XffngltahT '
" 'Heap plenty, yes,' aays h, with a
pleasant grin,..,
" 'What ateamar Is thatr t aska him,
"snd where I it going And what' the
news, and th good word, aad tha tint
of dayr
. " That steamer th Conchlta,' said ths
brown man, affable and easy, rollln a
cigarette. - "Him come from New Or
laana for load banana. , Him got looj
last night I think him sail in one, two
hour, Vorre nl-re day wo shall b goln'
have. Ton hear soma talkee 'bout big
battle, maybe so. Ton think catenae
General Da Vega, ssnorT Tssf Nor
"How that. Ham bo r say X. "Big
battle? What battle? Who wants
ea tehee Oenaral Do Vega? I've been up
at my gold mlnae la tba Interior for
spl tt men tha snd haven't hear aay
awn.' -r.
" Ob,' aaya th nigger-man, proud to
apeak the Eagllah, vorreo great revolu
tion in "Guatemala on week ng. , Gen
eral D Vega, him try be president Him
raw .arise one Cl ten": thousand
mana for fight at th government Those
govammeat n4 f l ve forty oner bun
drod thousand soldier to suppress revo
lution. They fight big battle yesterday
at Lomagrande that about nineteen or
fifty mile tn tho mountain. That gov
ernment aoldler whaep General D Vega
oh. most . bad, give - hundred nine
hundred two thousand of bla man la
kllL That revolution I smash feuppraas
bust very quick. General D Vega,
him r-r-run away fast on ana big mule.
Tea, sarrambos! - Th general, him
r-r-run away, ' and hla armee la kill.
That government aoldler, they try find
General D Vega vsrre much. - They
want ea tehee him for a hoot Ton think
they catch that general, senorr
"Saints grant tt;' say L "Twould ba
ths Judgmsnt of Providence for aottia'
the wsrlik talent of a Clancy to gradln'
the tropica with a pick aad shovel. But
'tls not so much, a question of Insur
rections, now. aa Uttl man, a 'tls of
tho hired-man problem. Tls anxious X
am ta resign a situation of responsi
bility and trust with th Whit wings
department of your grant, and degraded
country. Bow mo in your llttlo boat
out ts that steamer and I'll glv y five
dollar sinker pacers sinker aeoors.'
aay I. raducta tn offer t the language
aad denomination of tba tropic dialects,
- Cinoo peso,' repeat th little man
Tlv doilee, yon girar . -, T
"Twaa not euch a bad Uttl ata a. Ha
had hosiutlon at first sayln that Ps
angra leavln1 tb eoustry had to have
pa pars and passports, but at last h took
m out alongald th ateamar.
Day' waa Just break In' a w struck
bar. snd there wass't a soul to b bean
on board. Tb water waa very still,
and tb Bigger-man gav at a lift from
th boat and I al Imbed ant th eteamer
wher her ld waa sliced to th dok for
loadln .fruit The hatch WVe pea
and I looked down and saw tha ears
of bananaa that filled th bold to wtthla
alx feet f th top. I thinks to myself.
Clancy, you better a a a stowaway, it's
safer. Th steamer men might hand
yon back to th employment bureau.
The tropica '11 get you. Clancy, tt yoa
don't watch, out'
"to I Jumps dewa easy among th
bananas, and digs eat a hoi to hid tn,
among tha bunch. In aa hour or so
I sould hear tb angina goln', and feel
ths steamer roekin', aad I knew we
were off to sea. They left th hatches
open for ventilation, and pretty soon It
was light enough la tho hold to so
fairly well. I got to feeiin' a bit hun
gry, and thought I'd have a light fruit
lunch, by way of rsfreshment I crccped
out of th hole I'd mada aad stood up
straight Just then I saw another maa
crawl up about tea feet away and reach
out and skin a banana and stuff It Into
his tnouth. Twaa a dirty man. black
faced and ragged- and disgraceful of
aspect Tea. th maa was a ringer for
th picture of ths fat Weary Willis
ta th funny paper. I looked again,
and saw K was my general man Da
Vega, th great revolutionist, mule
rider and pickax importer. When he
saw mo ths general heeiuted with his
mouth filled with banana and hla eyas
the else of cocoanuts.
Hlst!' I say , "Not a word, of
they'll put us off and msh u wslk.
"Vsev la LlrytH V; .J-s.-fjnPiTr
the sentiment by shovia' a banana Into
the source of It I waa car U in th gen
eral wouldn't recognise me. Th ne
farious 'Work of th tropica had left me
iookln' different There waa half aa
Inch of roaa whiskers coverln my far,
and my costume wss a pair of blue
overall and a red shirt " '
"How you som la th ahlp, aenorr
asked tha general aa soon aa be could
apeak.-. ......
""By tha back door whist!' say I.
"Twos a glorious blow for liberty we
struck,' rcontlnuca "but w was over
powered by numbers. Let us eeoept our
defeat like brave men and sat another
bensn.' ., ' '
" "Were y tn th cause of liberty
fish tin', aenorf say a th general, shed
din leers on the cargo. '
" To the last.' says I. Twa t led
the last desperate charge -against ths
minions of tha tyrant But It mad
them mad, and we waa forced to re
treat 'Twaa I, general, procured the
mule upoa wnlok you Moaped, Could
yo gly that rip buaah a Uttl beoat
thla way. general T It's a bit out of my
reach. Thank.'
-"Say you ap, brave patriot f said
th general, again weapin v- 'Ah. uioal
And 1 hava not of ths means to reward
your devotion. Barely did . I my 'life
bring away.. Carrara bos! what -a devil's
animal waa that mule, eenor! ' Llka
ships lit ons storm was X dashed about
Th skin of myslf was ripped away
with th. thorn snd via Upa tae
bark of a hundred tree did that beast
of the Infernal bump, and cause out
rage to the leg of mine. - In tho night
to Fort Barrio I cSmot I dlsposaas
an yea If of that mountain of mui and
hasten along th water shor. - I find a
little boat to be tied. t launch myself
and row to the steamer. I cannot see
any mans on board, so I climb on rope
which bang at th stds. I than myself
hid In th banana ' Surely, I say, if
th ship . captains view me, they shall
throw mo- again to .those Guatemala.
Those thing are not good, 'Guatemala
wui enooi uenerai . U vega, rnere
fore X am hid and remain silent Life
Itself 1 glorious. Liberty. It la pretty
good; but o good aa life . I do not
think,' ' ;.?. ' .. ,x ' .
"Three daya. as I said, was th trip
t New Orleans. Ths general man and
m got to bo cronies of th deepest, dye.
Bananaa we at until they were dis
tasteful to tha sight and aa eyeeore to
the palate, but to bananaa alon waa
th bill of faro reduced. , At night- I
crawls out. careful, oa the lower deck.
and gets a bucket .of fresh water.
That General D Vaxa was a man
Inhabited by aa engorgement of word
ana sentence. He added to the mo
notony or th voyage by dlveetln hlm
eiT ox conversation. Ha believed I waa
a revolutioniat of hla own party, there
beln", aa ha- told me. a good many Amer
ican ana other xorelanere In Ita ranka
Twaa a braggart and a conceited little
gabbler it was, though ha considered
himself a hero. : Twaa oa himself he
waatsd all his regrets at th failln' of
hi plot Not a word did tho little
balloon have to nay about - th ether
missehavln' Idiots-that bad been shot
or run themselves ta death ia hla revo
lution, .... .;.; ...
"Tb second day out hit was feeiin'
pretty braggy and uppish for a atowed
away conspirator that owed bla xist.
a nee to a mule and atolen bananaa He
waa tallln m about the great railroad
be bad been buildlnV and ha relate
what he call a cam la Incident about a
fool Irishman h Inveigled from New
Orleana to alias a pick on hla little
morgue of a narrow-gauge Una. Twa
aorrowful to hear th little, dirty, gen
eral tell tb opprobrtou atory of how he
put salt upon tho tall of that reckless
nd sUly bird. Clancy. Laugh, h did.
hearty and long. He shook with laugh
la, th black-faced rebel and- out oast
stand in' neck-deep la banana, without
friends or country. -. .
'Ah.' senor." b snickers. ' to " the
death would you have laughed t that
drollest Irish, I say to him: "Strong
big mana la need very much tn -Guatemala.'
, T will blow stiik for your
down-pisssod country.--ha ay,'That
shall yoa do." I toll him, - Aht ft was
an' Irish so comic. He see one box
break upon the wharf that contain for
the guard a few, gun... H think there la
gun In all th box. - Bat that ta all
pickax.' Tea. Ah! eenor. could you tb
face of that Irish have see when they
set mm to tn worgr.). t
"Twa thus tb x-bca of the em
ployment bureau . contributed to . the
tedium ot tho trip with merry Jest an
anecdote. ' But now and then, bs would
weep upon tb bananas and make ora,
tlon about the, lost causa of liberty and
the mule. ... . ... ..
"Twa a pleasant sound whew th
steamer bumped against the pier In New
Orleana. Pretty soon ws beard th nat-
a-pat of hundred of bar feet. 'and th
Dago gang that unloads ths fruit
Jumped on th deck and down Into th
bold. .-. Me and th general worked a
while at paaaln up th bunches, and
tbey thought wo were part of tho gang.
After about half an hour w managed
to slip off th ateamar onto th wharf.,
. "Twaa a great honor on tha hand
of aa obaour Clancy, bavin tha.entar
talnment of the representative of a great
foreign flllbustertn' power. I first
bought for th general and myself many
long drfnks and thing to eat that were
not banana . The general man trotted
HOW TO WOO MORPHEUS
. H ..."' i-;"
HAT la aleept What Induce
. It and what I tb special
agency concerned In tb re
cuperative " prooeeeT Al
though the have been burning ques
tions for a gee never wer they a truly
vital ' they are now when the de
mand oa our time are oftea ao great
that sleep doe not only rank aa a sec
ondary consideration but 1 often cut
cut altogether for the night In fsot
th demand for more eonsctousnes for
busy folks now stolen from nature in
cur Ignoranc aa regard a suitable
method ef recompensatton baa de
veloped something no less surprising
than a demand for artificial sleep, or
moan to- recuperate th Jaded f Se
attle by som process mr rapid than
th present snail-like rat of revltallsa
tlon, aay th Mew Tork World.
Tears ago, by a almpl experiment
and a proceed open to the moat aaetent
of thinkers, th writer chanced to
stumble upon th long-sought key 'to
dreamland. No other appliances than
those provided by nature herself wer
used, although what success or effect
there waa was dependent on certain
electrical properties of th living body
formerly surmised but little understood.
' Perhaps this vlto-oleetrtcal condition
may bo explained by the famous kite
experiment of Franklin more thsn a
century ago. Ha supposed tht light
ning ws caused by the pent-up elec
tricity In the elouda which had risen to
such high potential that It dlschsrgsd
sbruptly Into the earth. Forthwith he
.sent up a line to tap these cloud and
aa all ef us know a continuous stream of
electricity cam forth.
Th relation of th head to th body
la much the same as th electrified cloud
to th .ngatlva-artv. ad-iated-f
ending up a kit lina w very simply
rata up th hand and put it on th
bead. Although nature apared no pains
to thoroughly confine the aubtla energy
charge In the brain, the fact rematna
that whan limb connection la mada with
tha more negative body there Is at once
leakage. The electrical charg la th
brain gathers towsrd ths area touched
In gentle stream and thus It finds IU
way down through th arm and thence
to b absorbed by ths body.
As fsr bark SB ItJI Noblll detected
these currents end measured them.
They ar known s msn-currenta. but
for acme reason tbey hav never been
Investigated or applied until now. It
Is these gentle, quite Imperceptible
enough men-currants which by flowing
'in a certain way in tha nervous system
constitute th special agency upon which
bTaln recuperation depends during sleep.
Sleep sonslsts of thee currente; am
theee current a re sleep, and It I not
dependent on the blood ss formerly sup
posed, and henee our ability t aug
ment r retard its prsoesa. Th phJUV
W
along at my tdda. leavln all tk r
raneemeata to ma I lei him up to
Lafayette aqusr. a t a t on .a
bench in the little park, 'C'.reUee I
hsd bought for hire, and ho. humped
himself down on the seat like a little,
fat, contented hobo. I look him over
ae he sets there,, and what see pleases
me. Browa by nature and instinct hs
Is now brindled with dirt and dust
Praise to the mule, his clothes is mostly
string-and flap. Tee. th look f th
general man la agreeable tax Clancy.
. "I asks, him, delicate, if, by any
chance, h brought wy anybody'
money with hint from Guatemala.- He
sighs nd bump his shoulders against
th bench. - Not , a . cent All right
Maybe, Be tellU me. soma of hla. friends
In th troplo outfit- will send him funds
later. The general was a clear a cass
of no visible mean as I aver saw.,.
"I told htra not to raov front th
bench, and than I went up to th cor
ner of Poydra and" Carondelot Along
there I O tiara's beat v In Bv min
ute along comes. OHara, a big. fine
man, red-faced, with shlatn' buttons,
swlngtn' hla club; 'Twould be fine
thing- for. Ouatemala to movw Into
O'Hare's precinct Twould bo a fine
bit of recreation or Danny t suppress
revolutions and uprlsln's one or twice
a weak with hi club. - !
"I I04t workin' yt, .Danny r aaya
L walkin' up to hint -.
"Ovortlm.' aaya OHarra. Iookln'
over me suspicious.. -Wnt soms of Itr
"Fifty-forty-alx s th celebrated city
ordinance suthorlxin' arrest conviction
and imprisonment of peraona that suc
ceed In . conccalln' .th.aif' thr crime
from th police, . , . ,
; '- 'Don't ' y ' know "Jimmy Clancy T
say L T pink-gill ad monster!' Bo,
when O'Hsr recognised m beneath '
th scandalous exterior bestowed, upon
m by th tropica, I backed bint Into a
doorway, and told him -what I wanted
and why 'I wanted It 'All right,
Jimmy.' i aaya O Hara. 'Go back and
bold th bench. .; i b along la ten
minute . ,
Ta that tim OTIar strolled through
Lafayette Squar and spied two Weary
Willies disgrsctn' on of th benchea
la .ten minute more I. Clancy and Gen
oral D Vega, late candidate for the
presidency of Guatemala, waa tn ' ths
statlon-hous. The general . I badly
frightened and ealla upon m to pro
claim hi distingulshmenta and rank. .;
" Th man." says I t ; th police.
"used ta be a railroad man. ' He's n the
bum now. Tt a littl bughoaa. hs is,
on aoconnt of losln' his Job,"
" "Carramboaf aaya th general, fls-
aln Ilk a UtU soda-water fountain!
you fought senor, with my force a in
my native country. Why do you say
th lie? Ton ehau aay I ana tha Oen-
ral Do Vega, n soldier, on cabal-
" "Rail road ar,' says L again. On the
hog. - No good. Been llvln" for three
day an atolen banana Look at htm.
Ain't that enough T '
Twenty-rive dollar, or so day a, waa
what tha recorder gav th general. Ha
didn't hav a oeot, ao he. took the time.
They let- m go, aa I knew they would,.
for X had money to ahow. and O'Hara
knew e. nixty day. - Twaa Juat ao
long I slung pick for th great country
of Kam of Ouatemala." -
Clancy Dfttteed. There was a look of
happy content on his deeply sunburned .
race.
"Would you Juet atop around th cor-""
nor a minute with me 7" he asked. Tt '
ye don't mind, I'll walk with y there, '
and show ye Exhibit A. I go around ,
thor myself every 1 minute to look
at It and tho time' about up now." . .
I walked with him to the corner of
TJnblino and down th atreet a-llttla
way. A gang of me . under guard from ; -tha
parish prison waa at work cleaning
th very rubblahy atreet thue working -cut
the fine they, were unable to pay
Otherwise. ... .. . ;...
Clancy stopped mc on the eldewalk '
opposlts a little, rotund.-dark-featured
maa of foreign , aspect, who was strug
gling feverishly with a heavy Iron rake.
The beat wss almost tropical, and th
littl man showed vaat area ef damp- '
noes through hie tattered clothe.
"Hy. moneeorl" caned Clancy.
eharply. The little man looked up and
scowled darkly. "Tat strong mana."
shouted Clancy, chaerily. "Is needed in "
ix ew orieans. - Tea to carry on tns
good work, ' Carrambos! . ' Erin ' go
braghr . . ...
oaophy at Bleep and Its control Is ao '
estanstve that nothing short of a book
could elucidate tho whole, although there
Is much algniflsno la th fsct that un
it k ordinary electricity, vital energy,
whll very subtle. Is ponderable t a. It
Is a material fluid. If aa electrical cur- '
rent wer passed through th head It
might affect th nerve, bee us thsy
r sentient: but no chant would result
a during sleep or when the bends ar
applied and when tb ponderable our- .
rent f Iowa. i ' . ' -' .
In a measure Sleep may defined aa
a pbamanoa do to the flow of nerve
energy from the body to th head, while
eonsclousnss for the moat part la du
to a rovers condition 4. ., ft flows
from th head to th body.
Wer th condition not diamet
rically opposite we should know nothing
of ordinary sleep, or In ether words,
thee regular period of nnoonsolous
neas, and th sam would bo true If
nerv current were an Imponderable
form of energy. - Every thought and
very movement wo make when on our
feet demands a atlmulua from brain to
body, and being that thee Impulses
carry with them eorn of th braln'a
vital material It follow that In tiro
this organ muat become exhausted, and
the longer It ia kept active th more dif
ficult 1 eonsclousnss 'tor th greater I
Is th desirs tor resignation of will, re
pose sr sleep. This brain material Is
not -destroyed; It I - absorbed by the
many nerves of th. body until eat
orated, which la about th time tha
brain haa become thoroughly exhausted. .
One unconscious, th blood I shut off
from th brain, and soon tho electrical"
condition aa whll conscious ar re
versed, the brain 1 negstlv to th body,
and for thla reason nerv currents from
all parts of the body flow Into it and"
carry with them to reetoro gradually .
that wonderful material which It had
lost Whll conscious and which In Itself
seems t be ths sssene of mind or con- -sctouencee
when lodged ia thla organ of
mind.
Prom th American . Spectator.
The Arnold arc a very happy ooupl
after all these year. How do you ac
count for Itf . -
"Well, ho can't gst over the idea that
he married a mighty good woman and
apenda som ttm each day to prove It
to her." , -
( - jhaal th VTalatf.' -
.' From Ufa. '. -
Toung Lady to Clsrk In Book Store "
f am looking for something suitable for
an old gentleman Tho haa been mar
ried to years. ,Can yoa suggest snme
Ihlngt . i
Clerk (praaipUy A Half Caaiury.
f eaatflsV ,
A I-
7