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About The Oregon daily journal. (Portland, Or.) 1902-1972 | View Entire Issue (July 30, 1903)
.': v TOE OREGON DAILTT JOimH"AL. POHTLAND," TIITJItSDAT EVENING. JULY: 01003 ? EDITQUJLzAL GOcMENT nAND TIMELY TOPICS 4'- jffi .aa jackson 4r My' 1 "IT. n JOURNAL PUBLISHING COMPANY. Proprietors. Aifr..i THE OREGON DAILY JOURNAL, Fifth and Yamhill Sts., Portland, Oft CITY OFFICIAL PAPER. AN INDEPENDENT NEWSPAPER Entered at t.V Postofflce of Portland, Oregon, for tranaml: Mon through tha malls aa second-clc j mntver. Postage for single copies I ar an 8, 10, or 12-page paper, 1 cent; U to ZS pages, 1 cents; over 21 pace, I cents. TELEPHONES! Business Offlcf Oi on. Main 600: Columbia, 706. Edltorla' Rooma Oregon Main 250. SUBSCRIPTION RATES i Tarma by Carrier. The Dnttjr Journal, one year . . . . The Dally Journal six months . . Tho Dally Journal, three months .....! .... 1.00 .... 1.20 The Dally Journal, by the week 10 The 3emlWsekly Journal. The Semi-Weekly Journal eight to twelve pages each Issue, all the news and full aiarket reports, one year $1.80. ' Remittances should be made by drafts, postal notes, expreis orders and small amounts are acceptable In one and two-cent postage atampa. THE JOURNAL, P. O. Box 121. Portland. Oregon. Each man has his own vocation, talent Is the call. There la one direction In which all space Is open to him. He has faculties silently Inviting him thither to endless exertion. He runs against obstructions on every side but one. On that aide all obstructions are taken away, and he sweeps serenely over Ood'a depths Into an Infinite sea. This talent and this call depend on his organization or the mode In which the general soul Incarnates Itself In him. Emerson. THREE PHANTASIES. , ; Mr. Hoyt, the acting Attorney-General of V the United States, If not a humorist him self, is .the cause of humor In others. He - - jtas caused tha District Attorney, Mr. Hall to bring suit to!cancel land entries against " William H. Watklns, James E. Warwick and . 1 'Samuel L. Carson. These persons are al tered In the bill of comolalnt to be fictitious persons, yet they are cited to appear In court. and show tause. Many curious dimcumes arise In the case. The United States says to these defendants: "You rascals, you have no existence, you are not even moonshine or fleeting shadows, but you are casting clouds on my title, and you must come Into court ;' and suffer Judicial annihilation, or Judgment ' . will be taken against you In default thereof." Decrees against ghosts are not without Ju dicial precedent, for the inflexible Minos held his court In the realm of shades, and Telemachus describes, the punishment of : " these defunct, mgrates, perjurers and -hypo crltes who Inhabit the empire of the pitiless Pluto. But the jurisdiction of the United V : r States Circuit Court has never extended so ". far. . If it did, the precedent is not in point, fori a ghost Is not a fictitious person. Else si how could It suffer punishment? ' Writs have Issued to unsubstantial de .fehdants). In this law suit. ;Armed with these writs, It is Incumbent on the Marshal to find Vtaem. Perhaps no one is better fitted for the task than Mr. Matthews. It was related once, with malice doubtless, that a man had been voted at the Republican primaries upon Whom moasy marbles had been resting for 10 years. 3ut that la a different case. It Is not on all fours. There was at least a , tomb and a corpus delicti. But here the writ Is to be served upon a dream. A Action is to be summoned Into court, i "There's no such bird as the woggly bird And there's no such tree as the Jingo tree.' The task of Mr. Matthews will be diatress- ing. For If he were to find a Mr. Watklns , or a Mr. Warwick or a Mr. Carson, they would not be the men he seeks, for they would be real parsonages, and Mr. Matthews' writ jhis only 'Co fictitious persons. All a jnan has to do to elude the writ is to appear In the flesh to prove Justthe opposite of an alibi. He will be lost by being found and vanish by becoming visible. The Marshal's duty is to subpoena a paradox t Since personal service cannot be had without destruction of the defendants named, resort must be had to service by publication In a paper likely to meet their eyes. But here is the same difficulty. The moment the subpoena is read by the defend ants, they cease to be defendants, for the defendants art- fictitious nnd fictitious per sona can't read. There is no speculation In their eyes. The court's process must 'be obeyed, but how are these defendants to be punished for contempt? The court summons them with out avail, for if they came, the court would lose Jurisdiction by their mere presence. The complaint would at once become demurrable, for the cause of such is based upon the fic titious character of the defendants. And. if the court calls them, what then? f'l can call spirits from the vasty deep,"" said Glendower. "And so can I," said Hotspur, "but, will they come?" And what relief can the court grant? ' Ordinarily a defendant is supposed to have done or threatened some Injury to the plaint iff. But what have these fictitious defend ants done to injure the government? Noth ing except that they seem to have failed, neg lected and" refused, and still fail, neglect and refuse to be born Into the world. That may be disloyal conduct, but it is an ex ample that might have been followed with crdeit by some quite palpable people. The District Attorney will be in a quan dary at the trial. He muBt prove the truth Of his complaint and show that defendants are fictitious. If he does not do that, he loaes his case. If he does, he wins a vic tory over what the algebraists call "Imagin ary or Impossible 'quantities." i Messrs. Watklns, Warwick and Carsofrare not born yet, but when they conclude to be they will find the entries made by them While in the fictitious state cancelled by de- , croe of court. It la a good Idea and ought to have been .adopted a hundred years ago. What e comfort It would be now to see the Umber 'monopolists; 'met by. injunctions ren- Terma by Mall. ' The Dally Journal, by mall, on year..$t.C0 The Dally Journal, by mall, sht montha. 1.21 The Dally Journal, by mall, three montha US The Daily Journal by mall one month. M Tha Vtckly Journal. The Weekly Journal 100 columne of read ing each Issue, Illustrated, full market re ports, one year, f 1.00. dered against them while they were mere helpless fictions and 'before they became Immune to court process! How this new legal principle .ought to be developed, and by provident suits begun at once, prevent the public domain from being gobbled up before their time by millions yet unborn! Credit is due the Attorney-General's office for this effort to stop the per nicious activity of fictitious persons In per petrating, frauds upon the government. If some real criminals also are caught by ac cident .once In a while, it will, perhaps, be an encouragement to the Police Department. But It la a pity Cervantes couldn't have met Mr. Hoyt. What are Mambrlflo's hel met and windmills besides the transcend ental legal conception of a flcUtlous defend ant In a law suit? What Is a Dulclnea Del Tobosa alongside a masculine fantasy cap able of creating a cloud on title? A HARMONIOUS DE- MOCRACY. The last two national campaigns have been marked by serious dissensions in the Democratic party, which for a time seemed to threaten the disruption of what has been the most potent force for good government In the nation. Happily for the party and for the country, the coming campaign prom ises to present a re-united Democracy, pre pared to make valiant battle for the great principles of hoiest government, for which It stands. Courageously addressing Itself to the tem perate discussion of past differences, the party has been slowly but surely approach lng a condition of harmony. Factional bit terness have gradually subsided and the spirit of concession and conciliation has as sumed ascendancy, Discipline Is succeed ing disorder and the hosts of the Democracy are wheeling Vito line, a mighty army that may well horle for victory In 1904. In marked contrast to the growing har mony in the Democratic ranks Is the discord In the Republican party. No close observer of the political situation can be blind to the fact that there are many points of serious difference among the Republican leaders, which threaten to result In open rupture, Tariff revision will prove fruitful of trouble, for the avowed Intention of the party leaders to oppose any changes In existing duties will excite the keenest dissatisfaction In Iowa, In New England and on the Pacific Coast. Trust legislation will be another bone of contention, for the Republican lead era are committed td the protection of the trusts,', a policy which must meet with pop ular disapproval. Personal enmities and Jealousies,' and envy of'the overshadowing Influence of President Roosevelt, have sown dissension among those prominent In Republican coun cils, and their differences grow more ac centuated as the campaign draws nearer. Congressman Champ Clark wisely sum marized the situation when he declared that the Democrats are getting closer together, while the Republicans are steadily drifting farther and farther apart. To be victorious in the election of 1904, the Democratic party must unite upon some candidate for President who can rally the scattered cohorts and organize them Into a powerful and united army. The progress of events gives strong hopes that this result will be achieved and. thnt, better and stronger for past defeats, Democracy will again be triumphant. If the police would occasionally look be hind them they might And the criminals of whom they are In search. ' It's a pity that the people of Portland can not share Mayor Williams' faith in the Police Departmen.- - . WHEN COUSIN JADE I CAME TO TOWN , Last Wednesday certainly was a dull holding up the corner of Forty-first street. I looked at Sapper and he at me. "Dipper," says he, "how strong are youf" "Two bits," I says. "Use it, use It," he says. "I got a mouth full of feathers." Well I told him that It was useful coin, Topoke up State was due to get off here. The two bits would make aft awful quick flash with Cousin Jabec. I would take Cousin 'Jabes In and buy him something right Quick. Banner would have to do tha. Weberenrleld raff. "Oh. I don't care for It." After that Uncle Jabes would unravel and Sapper "What, time do you expect him?" asks "Any minute," says I. "My tongue's so dry," says Sapper, blow out of my mouth." I told' him to hold on for a little while enough, In about 20 minutes along rolls a Jabes of Topoke. "Now, add up your conversation," says I in a whisper. 'TH steer." I couldn't help Sapper bursting Into tears when he saw the roll Cousin Jabes pro duced to pay the cabman with. I introduced my cousin to him, and he dried his eyes." That was the time of all others to get busy. I asks the soul-stirring question. Cousin and Sapper, with a reproachful look in his was afraid to take anything. Cousin Jabes says he couldn't taste much anyway. And would we have something said his stomach felt so much better he my cousin's wad he gives Sapper the office In all my life saw anything like the glad light Cousin Jabes wanted to see a show or Sapper looms up with the Information that race. It's a pipe. Sapper says we might to wait for a man that promised to turn up to get away that he skins us off twenty expression of admiration, and away we starts. Cousin Jabes says he liked traveling In his little country store. He said it did him good occasionally to get out with a couple of thoroughbreds like us. We said almost in the same breath that the people who iruyed countrymen didn't know enough to come In out of the rain. All we ever met were real wise and could give a gold-brick "Te see," says Cousin Jabes, "I don't off to the right thing, and I'll do it." So when we gets to the track the second sees a horse at 100 to 1. He says: "I wouldn't throw my money away on explained that the horse didn't have a ghost "Oh yes he has," says Cousin Jabes, win II." Sapper turned away to smile, and I had the bar. We batted out three Juicy ones, and "You want to get down for twenty on twenty quick. I think I can get 3 to 1 on Cousin Jabes got excited and gives Sapper the double sawbuck. "Get It down, Sapper," says I, "nlxy film. It Jooks good to me." Sapper looked disappointed, but he sees I'm In earnest, and soon he comes back. He got it down at S to 1 all right. They home. Sapper's eyes began to blase, and he 'my hand. We walks over to the bar, where Cousin Jabes was telling the bartender about Borne new hair restorer. The next race was tne kind in which Jabes got two dollars, down at SO to 1 on a horse named Skates. He said he made some money out of skates In his stoi"e the ' winter before. ' Would you believe it, that horse came home all alone? Well, It did, and Cousin Jabes began to stuff money in his boots. Then he took two more brandies and began to talk about oughty mobiles. He would have a puff cart, and I telephoned for one , We couldn't get Cousin Jabes to bet on Sapper's good thing. He said he felt stiff In his Jlnts and thought he'd walk 'round a bit. Meanwhile Sapper and me cashes in $90 on the tip. Then we gets frosted feet and hunts up the automobile. We found Cousin Jabes matching ntckles with a stable boy and falling asleep every two minutes. It was dark when we landed back on Broadway. We put my cousin to bed. He said he thought he'd feel better after a while. "Dlpner." says Sapper to me. after we the town, "you're an artist. Shake my affairs of this kind with a piece of lead pipe you pulled this off excites my warmest admiration. Let's get some air. JEAN C. HAVEZ, In New York Telegraph CLEVELAND ON Grover Cleveland, in an article in the current Collier's Weekly, "A Few Plain Words on Labor Troubles," holds that the force of public sentiment will lead to gen eral arbitration of labor disputes. The national characteristic of underlying common sense, he maintains, will force a change of the present attitude assumed by capital and labor, and that ultimately patriotism and the general sentiment of all classes will prova irresistible forces, working toward conciliation "We know that patriotism is not dead,'1 says he, "and Is still able to foster and bless the "best American citizenship, but Is there not reason to fear it so weakened among those enlisted In contentions between employers and employes that they either are unconscious of its restraints or seek to avoid. its exactions by giving lodgmeujt to the deluding notion that their quarrels do not "Any Intermediary that attempts to bring the parties at difference together In amicable deliberation should be absolutely disinterested an4 impartial to possess the unqualified respect and confidence of all concerned. The National Civic Federation and like organizations established In various localities Illustrated the beneficent uses of such an 'Intermediary. Many- labor troubles are prevented and many settled through their interposition. Operating on the same, lines we have seen voluntary arbitration resorted to by contesting parties of their own motion. "These forces of patriotism and public thoroughly awakened they are Irresistible for the nation's Integrity or the people's welfare.. If those who contend in labor quarrels fail to find for themselves the path of peace and quiet we need not despair of a remedy, "We can hopefully await the hour when the patriotism of the people will be aroused to the consciousness that danger threatens the republic, when public sentiment shall search out the right and wrong of labor disputes and, adjudge that they shall no longer breed 'terror and hatred among those who should be willing co-workers in achieving the great national destiny." MR. UN REGENERATE ARISES TO REMARK. "The flowing bowl" and "half seas over" go together as a natural sequence. "Hard luck" stories are unlike other kinds In that they are never finished. A plethorlcfeellng of the purse at night Is apt to be transferred to the head "the morning after." "Playing the races" is a misnomer. It Is Life In the metropolis is like a marble the "Inside" It can go on Indefinitely. The Convenience and conventionality are akin only In the first two syllables. In this part of the country they say "What will you haver In Kentucky It is "J3ow will you have it?" Home men go-mrougn me uwKing u uiuugii mcj vwcu uiniiBcivco inuiicjr. Many a fellow who Is anxious to get Into the social swim finds himself in hot water. The college graduate now goes forth with world's eyes. New York Telegraph. Lord Curzon works fourteen hours a day. till 1:80 or lunch time he gives an nour then he works again till dinner time; at 10:30 study and remains there until 11 o'clock in the an hour and a half in the open air each wherever he may be on board a steamer, temporary dwellings during his tours. And scarce realise that he Is so terrible a worker. Dr. Elvl'a Castner of Marienfelde, near women to come to this country to study a given up her profession of dentistry after many years of successful Work and Is de voting herself to a school of horticulture for women founded 'by herself, There are tiow a number of women dentists In Germany. . s Nearly $800 has been subscribed by officers . of the United States marine corps for the erection of a monument over the grave Cemetery. Capt. Davis was killed In thebattle day up to 2 o'clock. Ma and Sapper stood and I explained that myteousln Jabes from could sing out strong In the chorus. Sapper. "I'm afraid to take a deep breath for fear it'll and I'd have Mm as busy as a bee. Sure New Tork Central cab and out steps Cousin Right Into the nearest cafe we flies, and Jabes says he could use some peach brandy, eye, said his stomach was out of order, and he peach, but that It was a good kind of drink else. I thought I d nave tne same, ana capper thought he'd Join us.- When the bartender saw that he'd stand for the flnger, and I never of happiness that stole Into my pal's eye. do something. So I suggested the races, and he's got a galvanised hermetlcal Inhe fourth miss it If we didn't hurry, and I says I had with money. Cousin Jabes was so Impatient apiece. Sapper lifted his hat to me with an and told us how lonely he got sometimes man ten holes and beat him to the bunker. want 'em to think I'm a yap. Now yovj tip me race la Just about ready to go. My cousin that horse." I told him he was sensible, and of a chance to win. "or they wouldn't ask you to put up $100 to all I could do to pull my cousin over to Sapper turns to my cousin and says: Xadplpe. They go In a minute. Olmme it." were off In a minute, and Leadplp walked cashed. He laid four twenty-dollar notes in you pick the winner with an ax. Cousin had fed ourselves tone of tho best meals in hand, f ve got friends who blunder through or chloral drops. But the ease with which LABOR TROUBLE3. through arbitration. concern the general good? sentiment may sometimes' sleep, but when the rectification of any wrongs that menace hard work for the most or us. and a big fly wheel. If the marble be on other way well, you know what happens. . hlB sheepskin to pull the wool over tha He starts In the early morning, wortts ana a nan io me numerous guests ne nas,, he leaves his dinner guests, goes to his morning. He seldom spends more than day. And he works at this Wgb i pressure in a railway or when resting at one of his yet those who meet him as his guest can Berlin, who was one of the first German profession closed to her 1ft Germany, has of Capt. Austin R. Davis la Arlington: of Tlen-Tstn la J.J0O, ... - v . j y ..... ' ' - -" - ::''-:. ' AROUND THE CORRIDORS S ; Ki . ! . .i. ....... ..'., .7, ... . . i "The Oregon Information Bureau- is an educational. Institution." remarked . George O. Blrrel office secretary. "Every day more people are visiting the bureau' and it la sur prising where they come from. One man registered the other day from Portland, Me, and I have Just received a letter from W. Brenner, of Darmstadt, Germany. "Mr. Brenner asked the price of land, the quality and the resources. ? forwarded him a lot of folders and other matter relating to Oregon which I hope may be the means of bringing in some desirable settlers." Mr. Blrrel believes that folders printed In French .and German and circulated In Europe would be a good means of adver tising the state. "There la .one trouble," however, "he said, 'and that is the fact that people In the old world have no conception, of tha sis of this country, - This is also true to a great extent in the Eastern States. Take a resident of Rhode Island or some other little dwarfed Down-East commonwealth. It is hard for him to believe that you could lose kail of New England and have land to spare In nearly any large Western state. 'I believe that our early geographical ed ucation wis along wrong lines. No matter If Oregon is larger than New Tork, I always had the impression in my youthful mind that the populous Eastern state was more ex tensive." "Talking about the difficulty foreigners have in mastering English, did you ever hear of a blunder that set a whole streetcar In an uproar?" asked Oeorge Usherwood this morning. "Well, I was the victim of one last night. A French rnena or mine who has been In the country a number of years, but wno sun speass me language Imperfectly met me and my wife In a car in which we were both Journeying out to an entertainment. He greeted me with all his usual friendliness and to show that he had THE LETTER BOX. Editor Journal: I fully agree with The Journal in respect to the manner of secur ing good city government. The primary fault in city affairs is with the tteoole themselves. Our ideals are not high enough, and our practice. Is too often corrupt. We are to blame for ail mat nas happened and for all that ls-llkely to happen. The people of this city do not properly ap predate the responsibilities that rest on them as cltisens. They have tne power in the ballot but they do not use It They do not realise fhat they have the right to rule In city matters and that they not only have the right to rule, but that it their duty to rule, In ,order to secure good government. The great body of the people of Portland ought to know that If they do not take hold and run things, Incompetents and tricksters will shove themselves into all the places of patronage and power and that corruption and loss and crime will result as surely as that night follows day. The whole popula tion of Portland ought to know .that We live in a world of law of cause and effect and that under natural law we reap what we sow. If the people don't care, some thrifty fellow who Is looking for plunder will care, and he will take out pf their pockets what he Is looking for. If the peopla have low ideals of fitness for office, and cannot or will not distinguish between honest men and dls honest men, then they must not grumbl.' when rogues jput their heads together for mutual profit. v It all depends on what the people want, and how hard they will work to s;et what they want. If they want good government and will work for It, they will get It. If they are careless or Indifferent about it, they will notget good government. Plunderers are always ready to run public affairs. They stand around looking for a rhinr to aret lrt. and they are too often successful, either because the people are in different, or because so many are hoping to share In the results. It is want of intel ligence, or want of principle, that breeds corruption, as a stagnant pond breeds poiiy wogs. The lnfllfference of the people breeds the boss, and then the boss. In turn, brow beats and bullys and robs the people, and It Is In this way that the people are punished for their sins of omission. If the great body of the people were good enmiirh. and wise enough, and vigilant enough, and independent enough, they would not be contented with .the rule of the boss, or of any cliquy or faction, or of any po litical party in city affalm And they would not put a conservative, cringing, politician in a place where" courage and conscience artd manhood are required for the best public service.- If the people were up to snuff they would set down hard on the man who should attempt to play boss. They would take him by the nape of the neck and invite him to the rear, and he would go, because they have the votes to '.put ., him there. Shame on a community, of Americans who will confess tlat they are boss-ridden, when every one of thorn holds a ballot in his hand. Are they mn, or only things? Finally, if the people of Portland want a. rood, strong. , honest, efficient , government, and, will put forth the necessaryenrort, in telligently directed, they can have ;L but thev can get it no other way. inere is dm one way to Ahe highest and beet results in anything, and especially so. in municipal government ONE OF THE PEOPLE.- . Editor Journal: What kind of market re ports do you keep in The Dally JournaL-tv what kind of commission men is there In Portland? If I send large and fat fowls I am paid" by the dosen and if I send small nrt lonn fowls I am paid by the pound. I wish you would advise ' sne ; through nThe Dally Journal which, is the proper wajr xowis are sold, or do the commission men. pocket the difference on large rowts. C. 8V not forgotten my ' better half, he politely asked me How do you and your wife ire along f I thought he wanted Information" about the married.stata, but a titter from my wife and a- roar from the crowd warned me that he had made a blunder. , He seemed to understand that fact also, for he corrected himself as much as he could, but the titter continued and (I did not - feel well until t got off that car." ',, ', , : L. V. Druce, agent for the Grand Trunk system with headquarters In Seattle, Is in Portland . on , business. The Grand . Trunk needs a branch offlo In Portland." he said. "but I don't know when a resident agent be .Installed. Merchants and shippers always partial to their own townsmen and w naruor . xor an outsider io get business than It Is for one. who Uvea In the piaee." Mr. Druce says trade on the ' Sound la good. West-bound , traffic, la better, than east-bounar-he thinks, "The blockade In the spring," he said, "had something to do with present conditions. As a whole I be lieve trade Is better than It was a year a'go." Prior to the council meetlnr vesterdav Mayor Williams was pacing impatiently up and down the aldermanle chamber, evidently. greatly annoyed about something. It was a half hour after the meeting of the body had been called and the executive was . becoming anxious.. "Rather late. Isn't It?" Inquired one of tha reporters of His Honor. "Those counclUnen are behind time, . but I notice, Mayor, they never have to wait for you." "That's very true," replied Portland's ex-, ecutlve. 1 have always made punctuality; ' one of the Inflexible rules of myllfe." Looking at the man of many years, whose life had been crowned with success, tha youthful scribes' concluded that the Mayor's rule was in no small measure responsible for his rise to fame. porta are as" accurate as It Is possible to make them with an ever-changing market. The trouble In your case Is, wa believe, that V you ship to bouses which are not perfectly . reliable, as the quotations In this paper will also be found to be Just what the good sell for to the retailer. In a majority of "the houses in this city poultry Is sold by tha pound. In some few cases, however, sales by the dosen are made, but the dealer knows to a pound Just what the poultry, be sells weighs. Ed. HEARST A8 A PRESIDENTIAL CANDN DATE. When, on April 29, 190S, William Randolph Hearst's New Tork Evening Journal reported his marriage to Miss Milllcent Wilson, ythe age of the bride was given; bat not- that of the groom. Who's Who In America pre serves a like silence as to the year of Mr. Hearst's birth. It is possible that , this youngest of the presidential candidates la trying to suppress his age, not as women are supposed to do, but because he might be thotfght too young for the office he aspires to. Call him 36, That tea very satisfactory age,' A any rate, he la old enough to be the moa conspicuous and possibly the most powerful individual factor in American journalism during the five years last past; and he Is old enough to occupy a seat In congress to which he was elected last autumn by the nearly, unanimous vote of his district in New York. Mr. Hearst's father was a United states Senator from California and a mining multi millionaire. The son bids fair to surpass the father, both in business and in politics. Certain mossy politicians of both parties affect to sneer at this young fellow and his ambltkra but if I can read the signs right, they g4 going to learn to rate him a grea$ dewl. higher than they now do. Among the -men suggested for 4he Democratic nomination in 1904 Cleveland, Gorman, Hill, Parker, Bryan, Harrison of Chicago, Tom Johnson and Fltshugh Lee, Mr. Hearst seems to me to be the strongest leader ms party couiq j choose. He is as strenuous as Roosevelt, JTi and, like Roosevelt, he has a definite programT I for doing things. Like Roosevelt, he At&Jr I the people Into his confidence tells IJijUn I frankly what he wants to do, and Is always doing something. His Journals often offend thetfaste of the' polite minority but presi dents aire not elected by polite minorities. Cleveland couldn't be elected constable out side of Wall street. Bryan lifted jiatlonal politics .into the realm of ideality, for four years, and for that we owe nim more man we are likely to pay; but he crawled Into the grave when free silver was buried. Gorman and Hill are just plain party hacks and has- beens. Parker lacks prestige, a platform and money. Harrison and Johnson are strong at . home, but very uncertain quantities in the national field. Neither, probably, could carry his own state. A campaign with Hearst run ning against RooBevelt would be a corlrth. I And, in my Judgment, Hearst Is the only mamt I his party who could run fast enough toLf make Roosevelt sweat---National Magazine. - N IT GAVE HER AWAY. Her bathing suit she wore about The streets of' Bensonhurst; She said it did not matter If The public knew the worst; But when the summer waned and she ' Had failed to find a beac, , 'Twas plain the suit told many tWftv- The men don't care to know. New York News. A MAN OF' FAMILY. Bleeker I understand you have renounced single blessedness since last we met Meeker Your understanding Is In accord with the facts. . Bleeker And- whom did yOu marry. Meeker Sallle n Brown, ' her mother, her mother's husband and ,ail the rat of the Brown family. Chicago 'News. A bibulous man "who speaks by the card says there Is" always room atth top-aftir the foam has been, blown off. Chicago News. ruhk -laid, -a will It i'd k The Oregon Dally Journal's market-re- ' ft , -i ' ' -V-"