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IBTXLINO TO OBLIGE.
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XT SEEMS HARD.
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The Customer "Are they er large
dogs or lar dogs?"
.The Denier "Well er which kind
was you thinking of buying, elr?"
WARNED.
riappy Hank "Well, I Jus' b'llevo I'll help that lady
git her hat off. .
"Don't move, madam; I noticed your hat sorter stuck,
but I'll haul It clear.
"There, what did 1 Ull you, hey!"
"It's a mean shame, but say, I'll know pettar text time.'
SEASONABLE SCENES THE EXPLORERS.
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Mrs. Goodun "Beware of the bottle,
tny good man."
- Tired Bill "You Jn bet I do; I once
cut me mouth drlnkln' out of it an'
I'm mighty careful to stick to de can."
'
PBOOT.
AppUcai.t "I am ojulte sure have
..a gJ -raioe."
... Manager "What makes you think
o?"
Applicant "Why,, all my neighbors
advise me to go abroad and study."
HIS ATTRACTIVENESS.
Oumly "Now tor a good washt
"Bpl-sh-rr-brrrl ThTa la luxury!
0e! I must be a good-looker!
Everybody stares at me."
NOT QUITE.
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earth parties are mow la order.
ANXIOUS MOMENT.
J A-PlAYlN' lift J
Paw "Rastual Don' let dat mewl eolt kick so' on de
haid! He ain't got so shoes on yet! Does yo' want to
ruin dem feet?"
BETBOQEADINQ.
WHEN THE LAUGH SHIFTED.
Baboon "Hullo, Chatters. I hope youH get your
goods moved by May 1, 1904. Sorry I Mn't wait; goodly."
Chatters Til be baoftf In an hour and more your
ewtflt (or fifteen cocoanuts; ta ta, old. man!"
IN GENTLE LITE.
Mrs. Tryingto Get there "That Is the armor of one of
my ancestors."
Mrs. Beontherea Longtime "Ah, he was a dealer In
old Iron, I presume?"
THE BLUIT THAT DIDN'T COMB OUT.
Mr. Ardbuppe "Now, James, will you see what brands
of wine we hare In the house!" "
James "W'y, we on'y got dent three dinky little
bottles wot you done bought at vde grooery dls after
noon, eah, diss all!" -
READY J03 THE COOL CHANGE.
Greyhound "My! He looks comfortable In the raw
easterly breezes!
"Qimme one o' those French suits.
This Is better than shivering. Say, boys, note my
tyle."
EVEN HEBE.
Mr. Chatters "Here, Pelly, old chap, hold my wealth
till the tax asieneor has gone by.
"No, Mr. Assessor, I lont possess a single eoooenut
My wealth Is all In real estate,"
Farmer Ragweed "Has Bill learned anything tew col
lege?" Mrs. Ragweed "No; an' wnw'n that, he's forgot what
he useter know! Says he can't eat pie without a fork!"
JUST HJt THING.
Mr. Hippo "A two-room flat. Just on roots apiece,
and all for fifteen cocoanutg a month!"
UP WITH THE TIMES.
i ll l-u faoa.
Mr. Base "That's right! Make 'em geod and sharp.
I'm going to get some of that rubber bait this season
or know the reason why!"
GENTLER SEX.
Mr Flapper ''Miss Whlcser has had a fender put on
her auto."
Miss Flipper "Bound to catch a man somehow, I sup-
poae" '
ANOTHER DISAPPOINTMENT.
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'Stout "There's that stiff-necked, conceited old
Bobeter; I'll bet a dinner . nothing on earth could
make fclm bow his head,." ,
Peak "I'll take you!"
Stout (next morning) "Wejl, put up your old lad
der; 'taln't fair, but I'll stick to. my bet. Hush, here
comes old Booster!"
"And I win the banquet!"
PHOTOGRAPHING MILLIONAIRES IN THE EAST.
FREE RIDE
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