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About The morning Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1899-1930 | View Entire Issue (Aug. 6, 1908)
THURSDAY, AUGUST G THE MORNING ASTOMAN, ASTORIA, OREGON. 1.1 Choice tain benezer. B CLARISSA M ACME. Copyright, im. by ClarlMS Mtokls, l ATTAIN KBENEZElt IIODSON wanned and dried bis dishes with amazing ctilerlty. In a trlco they stood In , shining rowi on tho trim drossor, and tlie gnuut form of the captain was bent over bis ltttl cook atovo, while lilt great brown band wera plying the blacking bruttli vigorously, Whon the atova abona llko a mirror and the tea kettlo fairly sparklod with cleanliness, tba captain swept out tbe kitchen and bung tba broom upon ita accustomed nook, wltb a algb of relief. II lighted an old pipe and sat down on tho door atep with bla back ngalnat tbe llntol and bla kwn hluo eyes Oxed across the bay to wboro tfis Ledge light anon Ilka a largo rod alar. It waa after aunaet and tba pals pink and primrose of fbe afterglow wera fading from tho western sky, Captain, Ehonokor waa lost In reverie III blackened pipe went out aty uu noticed and hung from hla fingers Hat lessly, whU the old aatlor whistled , softly to bluiHnlf. Rttddunly he alappod bla knee and burnt Into a hearty laugh "Ho. hop he chuckled. "1 guess that will fetch, one or t'other of 'em I 11 me ave. Now, tho Wlddnr Ranks anya, aaya aba, 'it ain't no good for man to tfre alone, Capt'u ElHmeter, and, more over, 'taint always good for wlmrnen, eltbcrr Now, I wonder if Wlddor Hank a meant I ahould aak Mis Phoebe to chango her unmet", Again the cap lain shook wltb laughter aa be con templated upon the rather complex atate of hla love-affaire, for bluff, hearty Captain KUeneter bad tired of hla long. lonesome yeara of widowhood and bad determined to seek another companion to share hla anug cottage on tba beach and the proceed of hla fiablng amack, tba Saucy Lis. "Now," mused tbe captain, "there's Mlaa Tboebe, aa trim a little craft aa ever aalled tho aeaa. She's good na tored and a good cook, and I gueaa aha tn't a f oared of the water. A sailor's wife ought to be able to aoll across the bay without gettln' yaller about tbe gills., I don't know, though, whether ahe'd move down to my cabin. If Mlaa rboebe won't have me, I'll have to aak the wlddor. There ain't another woman wuth marry In' within twenty tulles; but, Lor, the wldder'e tongue '11 make tblngi lively, I suppose!" Captain Elwnexor bad algbed after Mlaa PhfM'be Lummla fur many month. That little lady'a utter Indif ference to hi society bad chilled hi anient aallor heart, and be bad changed bla matrimonial courae In the direction of the Widow Banka' brown bouae on tbe high bill overlooking the bay. Captain Ebenezer bad made up hla mind to marry, and marry, be would, on or too other of the two ob BUUHT INTO 4 HIABTT tACOB. Jocta ,of bli choice whichever one would have blm. ,. That night: the 1 wind changed and blew restlessly from the southward. The pale aun rose on a gray-green bny whipped with white fonm and on long green waves that broke on tbe beach with a aullen roar that waa music to Captain Ebenezer's ears. ... "It's pretty roughlsh," he muttered between tbe teeth clinched on bid pipe, "but the Saucy Liz Is aa safe as a rockln' chulr, and If either of them two wlmnicn la Beared to go out In her alie won't do fer me!" He apat re flectively i at one . great '-, roller ," and stepped back (is -It broke wltb a hiss ing roar over bis feet. "Pretty near got )ne that tlmei gbl darn yer!" he chuckled, pulling hla sou'wester snugly over his ears and turning up the shore road toward the little village which nestled between two high, protecting bluffs.' "Good morula', ' Mrs. Banks," he called" cheerily ns the. widow opened wide hor hospitable door In answer to bis resounding summons. "I'm goln' out to Bar Island for a mess of blues. Thought roebbc you'd enjoy the sail!" Mrs. Banks cast a startled glance over tho captain's burly shoulder to ward tho tossing, tumbling, whltecap pod bny, , !, ", ' ' ' Irl "I. " . I "You nlu't afraid, bo your flaked tbe captain hopefully, edging bis way to ward tbe steps and unuonaolously glancing, toward a small white bouse ... , , ........... ,? , , ., . . i . tuilf hidden among tho oaks across lb road. . ... "Of course I ain't a , tnlte ufrold. Captain Kbeupzer," an Id Myra Banks at liiHt. "It nlu't tho kind of a day I'd cIiooho to go out for pleasure, but I'm a sailor's wlddor, and It ain't for mo to balk before a sou'west storm. Many' the storm I've rid out with poor Jim before be bad bla lmtt sickness and" "Yes. yea, ma'am,'' Interrupted Cup' tain Ebenoasur hastily. "I'll be rendy to caat off In about an bour, wfcen tbe tide turns, although It don't make much difference on a day like inn whether we wait for tide or not" , "I'll be ready, captain," returned My ra Bank! decisively. "I guess I'll take & basket and got some beach plums over to the Island. I beard they wes a-plenty tbero." "So tbey be; so tbey be. I thought mebbe I'd aak Mlaa Pboobe to go along. too, as company for you, ma'am." "So do; so do," agreed Mrs. Banki Ironically na she watchod the captain's .s. ... Teaks tbk lokdI" mokcbrd1 cimm epKHBzaa. stalwart form proceeding down tbe path. "I bellcre I see Phoebe Lummls truatln' herself to tbe Saucy Lis or nny other craft on a day Ilka thla. I gues victim Is fur two will be a-plcuty this day!" She closed tbe door and went within, wbure She busied herself over her preparationa wltb more trepidation than Captain Ebonezer would have bo llevcd she could display. In the meantime the captain bad rolled up tbe trim path bordered wltb snowy clam shells which outlined rows of richly colored dahlias and gay, ninnv huod astera. "Terribly neat. Mlaa Phoebe," be muttered dubiously aa be tiptoed across the freshly painted porch and rang tho bell. Mlaa Phoebe Lummls, small, ex quisitely neat In person and delicately neat In form and feature, aa Captain Ebenezer mentally Inventoried bcr, smiled pleasantly upon tbe good look ing sailor man. "Come rlht In, captain," sbe said cheerfully, throwing open the door of her sunny parlor, where the honey euckto vinos cast dancing shadows on the walls. "Do sit dpwn wbllo I take my cookies out of tbe oven. I'll be back In a minute." Captain F.benezer looked around tho room approvingly. There were a gay ly figured brussels carpet, a whatnot containing strange seashells and curi osities from foreign lands, great rag ged branches of coral flanking the fire place and comfortable old fashioned chairs. There were geraniums In the front windows and a canary singing In an adjoining room. Many a long winter evening bad the captain played crlbbage wltb Miss Phoebe, and many a drink of sweet cider had be quaffed to waah down tbe dellclously crisp cookies and light doughnuts that she offered for his refreshment In spite of this entertainment tbe captain stood In wholesome fear or Miss Phoebe. who spoke what sbe thought In brief terms, and It was the fear of getting tho right about from Miss Phoebe that deterred the captain from uttering the words of affectiou that so often trem bled on bis Hps. , "It's a drendfui day on the water," began Miss Phoebe when she had re turned and seated herself opposite the cnptaln. "I don't know who'd want to bo out on a day like this!", 'I'm goln' out myself.''1 ventured the latter, twirling bis sou'wester In lite horny hands., "and 1 came In to'say that I'd like to have you go out with me In the Saucy Liz. There's a good fresh wind, nnd It won't hurt ya'.i none." ;. " "Never!" returned Miss Lummls de cidedly. "I'd be seasick the minute I trot u board. I nlu't no sailor, Cn'ptnht Euenezer, so you'll sail without me this time!" She smtled pleasantly upon tbe discomfited sailor,'' The WIdder Banks Is goln' alon.a to get bench ; plums on the Island, and I thought mebbe you'd be company fot I one another. You alu't a good sailor. thou, ma'am?'-' Cavt:'i'n Ebenezer's voice eiprewied poignant anxiety as be ventured this question. "Not a bit. I like a sail on a smooth sea, but no sou'westers for me, cap tain. You ask ma some time when It Isn't rough and I'll go wltb you glad ' ' . ;. "You wouldn't-Jou wouldn't-ob- easy thereP Captain Ebenezer tbmst a hand Insldo tbe collar of his flannel shirt and Jerked It fretfully, With sudden exasperation be Jumped to bis' feet and extended one band pleadingly. "You wouldn't marry uie, Miss Phoe be, would your be shouted desperate-ly.-' -,n:y: -'; f ':. ,;:-,' Miss rhoobe's tinkling" laugh died away as a pink flush rose to tier deli cate checks, "I might If you asked me, captain," she said demurely. "I thought mebbe you wouldn't want to Icav thla pretty house of yours. Phoebe," said the captain tenderly as later be occupied a placa on tbe sofa beside his fiancee. "I figured." began Miss I'boebe dreamily, and then sbe stopped, with a sudden shocked expression In ber mild eye-"I moan," she went on hastily. "I should think we could more this house right down tbe bluff and fasten It on to your cabin, you know." "Surest way, my hearty P sang Cap tain Ebenescr blithely. "And now"- "You better be going along, captain." Interrupted Miss Phoebe briskly. "I see tbe widder going down tbe road, and you don't want to keep her wait ing." . . .' ... '' . Captain Ebenezer stared, aghast. lie bad forgotten the Widow Banka and the proposed trip (o Bur Island. "I'm an engaged man now, Phoebe." he suKl, mopping his forehead and looking at ber out of troubled eyes. "Oh, go along, Ebenezer, do!" she said, 'with playfulimpatlcnce. "I ain't a mite Jealous. You wasn't engaged wbon you asked ber to go. Bring me a mess of blues, and you can come to tea and cat 'em" Captain Ebenezer's blissful smile faded from bis face aa be proceeded down the road to tbe beach, where be could see the red knitted Jacket of Myra Banks moving toward tbe land ing where the Saucy Lb: dragged at ber anchor. What the Widow Banks might expect from blm as a result of this marked attention Jio could not. dared not. Imagine. If he had only gone to Mlsa Phoebe's first! lie tried to recall If be tmd ever uttered a re mark to tbe keen wltted widow which might have committed blm In any way to an avowal of love. There was none that be could remember. He had been wary Indeed "Here I be a-waltin' for yon," begnn Myra Banks playfully as she deposited heavy basket on tbe landing. "I ex pect we'll have to eat up all tbe vie tualB so's I can put tbe plums In tbe basket. Where's PboebeP "Phoebe, she - Miss ,; Phoebe ain't a-comln'. She thinks lfs too rough for ber," exclaimed Captain Ebenezer. reddening nnder tbe keen gaze of the widow. "Now, Mrs. Banks, Jest step into tbe dory, your foot right In the mkldlo that'a It easy now-Mimpb so!" With surprising agility the big captain took bis place In the rocking boat and with a few quick,' loug strokes brought them to tbe side of the Saucy Llx. It Is needless to record this voyage over tbe careening seas, for neither one of the occupants of tbe sloop cared to remember tbe unpleasantness of that day. To the widow It was one long, nauseous period of terror. To Captain Ebenezer It waa a dark and gloomy pnssnge. Tbe successful out come of bis wooing was counterbal anced by the fear of what the widow might expect from bis marked atten tions In tbe past, ne trailed his lines and pulled In myriads of shining, steely blueflsb ere they grounded on tbe pebbly beach of tbe quiet cove. . The widow tottered ashore on Cap tain Ebenezer's arm, and tbey sot down, and while Myra Banks languid ly discussed tbe contenta of the lunch basket which the captain attacked with a right good will, the widow seemed to be revolving some weighty matter within her mind, a matter that might excuse her want of appetite aft er the bracing voyage. "I'll help you got your plums. Mrs. Banks," said the captain, looking kind ly upon the pallid face and disheveled hair of his guest. - Myra Banks turned a gloomy eye upon her host and then looked back over the tossing sea of green water and shuddered. "I guess It was a little tpo rough." ventured Captain Ebenezer uneasily. The continued silence of the Widow Banka was disconcerting and some what alarming.. Suddenly tbe pent up wrath of Myra Banka found vent and she shook quiv ering fingers In the air before the as tonished visage of the captain. , . '.'Rough, Indeed! And what do you mean by a-nskln1 frail wlinmen off oa a voyage like this, a-teniptla' thea with"- ' ' ' "Sho sho Mrs. Banks," expostulat ed the captain Indignantly. "Whatever do you mean?.. I didn't hold out uo temptations when I listed you to m. 1 Jes' asked you to go that was all!" "I waut to 'go "base," retorted" M?s. Banks bitterly la rpl;; t j tlie er.Mtiu's last - remarks, and . L;:u they.-we aK beating ." before- r.::j wia.!, - li.'ouu::; green heights of t?? ;:u;l i'.lv;::i 1u:j valleys flecked w!!!j YTlil'.e tlie captain was droppiu;; his uuc-sjr, Xy:' Banks looked fiercely i;jo;:t tin; I:.;;-;::' at the flying smacks, the fcsliVooCe: bluffs and around the deck of t'.:; Sun cy Liz. and yet she sr.ld ivver a' Silently she ucco'paulal , C;:;i:r.iu Ebenezer ashore, nnd sr.IIeulj xlu parted from him. aud then, just u Ue turned away from her, 'dangiluj .' string cf fish In his hand, sho called FAT FOLKS ONE DOLLAR ; -.',: ' .,-.'.-' ..... '. ' " : invested in a bottle of these wonderful, harmless fat reducing tablets and is 30 days you will be a normal, well-formed person again. Don't carry around your ugly bulk, your ungainjy mperfloui flesh. It makes yo. miserable, ridiculous and what is mor important, it subjects you to ktsj consequences. Sudden death from fatty Degeneration, Heart Disease, Kit ney Tsouble, Apoplexy and Muiular Rheumatism-all come from OVER-FATNESS. "ANTICORPU" R E M O V , E S FAT Thousands of Testimonials FromfkGrate ful Persons Prove This 'YOUR MONEY BACK IF IT FAILS if A NTI-CORPU" is absolutely the greatest discovery in medicine (or reducing FAT. It is made in the form of i little tablet out U VEGETABLE matter and is easy and pleasant to take. It is endorse! ly. every reputable Physician and College of Medicine. . Ask your doctor. U A ANTI-CORPU" is absolutely harmless. Tbe formula used in making this preparation is on file in the Bureau of Chemistry in Washing ton, which is proof that it is PURE and HARMLESS. U A 4TI-CORPU" reduces FAT from 3 to S pounds a week. It reduces Double chin, Fat hips and flabby cheeks. No wrinkles result from this reduction, for it makes the skin :lose fitting and smooth. (( A TI-CORPU" strengthens WEAK HEART, cures PALPITATION. "SHORT BREATH and acts like' magic ip MUSCULAR RHEU MATISM and GOUT. . , ' Pfipp CI (( Per bottle. Money back if it don't do all w " 5? Vf claim, if your druggist does not keep it, show him this advertisement and make him get it for you, or you can send for it DIRECT to us. We pay postage and send in plain wrapper. DFF 30 DAYS' TREATMENT IN EVERY BOTTLE. I KCC We will send you a sample of this wonderful fat reducing ' rrmedy on receipt of 10 cents to pay for postage and pack ing. The sair,e itself may br sufficient to reduce the desired weight Mention this j per. Desk 22, ESTHETIC CHEMICAL CO, 31 Weal 125th Street, Nsw York. N. Y. ; : TSiksZ, blm. . . v ... "Captain Cbenezer "i-ian!" "Yes." bo sUouteJ h-M'i v-v?ily. "I wouldn't marry a serrlu' f-sa for anything, so there ain't no need for you to come a-callln' any more!" She faced about and plodded up the road toward home. , . ' "Thank tbe Lord!" murmnrei Cap tain Ebenezer piously as he turned In to the clam shell bordered path be tween tbe dahlias. , DANGER IN DELAY. Kidney Diseases Are Too Dangerous For Astoria People to Neglect The great danger of kidney troubles is that they get a firm hold before the sufferer recognizes them. Health is gradually undermined. -Backache, headache, nervousness, ' lamenesr, soreness, lumbago, urinary troubles, dropsy(dibaetes and Bright's disease follow in merciless succession. Don't neglecfyour kidneys. Cure the kid neys with the certain and safe rem edy, Doan's Kidney Pills, which has cured people right here in Astoria. ; D. E. Duncan, who resides at the corner of Duane and Ninth streets, Astoria, Ore., says: "I had been troubled with a weakness of the back and loins often extending through the whole muscular system as far' up as the shoulders. Not only did my back ache but there was a weakness from the kidney secretions which was very annoying and disturbed my rest. I heard about Doan's Kidney Pills procured a box at Charles Rogers & SHE'S At QUEEN is an expression that ts always heard at sight of a well developed woman. If you are flat chested, with BUST undeveloped, a scrawny neck, thin, , lean arms the above remark will never be applied to you, "SIREN' wafers will make you beautiful bewitching.' They DE VELOP THE BUST in a few weeks from 3 to 6 inches and produce a fine firm, voluptuous bosom. They fiO out the hollow places. Make' the arms handsome e1 well modeled and of perfect contour. Send for a bottle ful.,. SIREN wafers are absolutely harmless, pleasent to take and con venient to carry around. They are soM under guarantee to do all claim or MONEY back. ' . ." ' Price $1.00 per bottle. Inquire at good' drug stores or send DIRECT to US. ' ' ' ., . ' ''.',-,.' ' " FREE During the next 30 days i,6ott!e of these beautifying wafers on receipt of, 10 cents t oay cost of packing and saw the Advertisement in this paper The sample alone may be sufficier.'t if defects are trivial. ; 1 ; Desk 22 ESTHETIC CHEMICAL CO., 31 West 125th St New York 1;!!?' Mlliif 1 it- ' 'ink,' 'y ; J Son's drug store, and used them. After the first few doses I felt bet ter and continued their use until cured. . I knew of others who have used Doan's Kidney Pills with the same good results." . : For sale by all dealers. Price 50 cents. Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, New York, sole agents for the ! United States. Remember the name Dean's and take no other. ! , , . ' , Excellent Health Advice. Mrs. M. M. Davison, of No. 379 ! 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These painless purifiers sold at Charles Rogers & Son's drug store. 25c. - : " -: - DEVELOP THI BUST : SHE'SIA SIREN the neck and shoulders shapely and oday and you'll be pleased and grate only we will send you a sample portage if you will mention that yc Pf l tu i My stock of men's and boy's shoes is unsurpassed for qua lity. Close buying and low expenses enable me to sell the best qualities at lowest prices. S. A.;GIMRE 543 Bond Street TRANSPORTATION. The K" Line PASSENGERS FREIGHT Steamer - Lurlin'e Night Boat for Portland and Way Landings. Leaves Astoria daily except Sunday at 7 pi. m. Leaves Portland Daily Except Sunday at 7 sL m. Quick Service Excellent Meals Good Berths Landing Astoria Flavel Wharf Landing Portland Foot Taylor St J.J. DAY, Agent Phone Main 2761. DAIRIES. TheVermontDairy All milk aerated before bottling. Specialty made of one cowi milk far infants. Satisfaction guaranteed. Phone 14 Farmers line. W. J. INGALLS. WINES AND LIQUORS. Eagle Concert Hall (320 As tor Street) .- i Rooms for rent by the day, week, or month. Bes rates in town. P. A. PETERSON, Prop. MISCELLANEOUS. HOT OR COLD olden West 2 t i " ea Just Right CLOSSET. & JDEVERS PORTLAND,fORE. Plate Racks, Wall Pockets, Music Racks, Clock Shelves Just inSee us Hildebrand & Gor Old Bee Hive Bldg. EMPLOYMENT OFFICE. J. T. NOWLEN Real Estate and Employment Office 473 Commercial St, Phone Have fine list of Astoria and coun try' property. All classes of labor furnished. '
