The morning Astorian., May 09, 1908, Page 7, Image 7

A
SATURDAY, MAY 9, 1908.
THE MOKNING ASTORIAN, ASTORIA, OREGON. I
fly
When Cupid,
Delayed Dinner
By BESSIE R. HOOVER.
Copyright. 1907. by Bessie It Hoover,
IT wan 8 o'clock on a raw inoniliiu
In early summer, and the twims
that were to luko tueui to tho lak'j
had not yet arrived.
There wtro hut two men In this
chilled company on tho church steps,
for tho auporlntomlopt and several of
the teacher could not hmve their work.
Tho Rov. Albert rashley wo one of
the fulthful; tho other win Ike, the son
of Deacon Clutnor, rich dairyman.
Ike wai allowed a substitute on thin
momentous day, and, while a hireling
lopped milk Into the Motley dishes of
the cuntouiem, Iko abandoned himself
to the varied pleasures of the Sunday
chool plcule.
Ike Clutner wa a stoop shouldered,
mlablo fellow with no particular fea
tnrea. He looked singularly out of
place Id hie boit clothes tnluua bla milk
can and uieaaure.
. The flrnt wskou rattled up after an
hour of wintry waiting. There had
been somo mistake about the time
there alwaya In. The Iter. Albert rash
ley clambered Into tho wagon aa a mat
ter of couree. Phyllis Jonei, who bad
walked In from the country, waa a I-
"AW, THCKDKRl" OnCMDLtD lit.
ready In the wagon when Ike Clntncr,
brushing aside the squirming children,
forcibly took bla teat bealde her. Ike
did not menu to leave bla courting to
chance, for holidays were scarce with
him. But Mr. Pashley, the minister's
wife, who was going to wait for the
last wagon, cried:
"We'll need a man In our crowd. Ike,
you stay nnd go with ua."
' "Aw, thunder!" grumbled Ike under
his breath and climbed disconsolately
out, and the first load rumbled away.
Tbe second wagon came In half an
hour. Ike, fearing that ho might bo
lcft out entirely If the minister's wife
happened to think of any reason for
his staying behind, plumped himself
down by the driver's side and left the
mothers nnd children to scramble In
as best they could.
"Which way?" questioned the driver
when tbey were within a mile of the
lake.- "Are you goln to Coggln's gap
or to Feather'sr
Tlala caused consternation among the
mothers, who all knew that they were
going to the "gap," but did not know
which ouo.
"Coggln's," volunteered Ike, with the
Intuition of a lover.
"Feather's gap," corrected the min
ister's wife. "I remember now. It's
Feather's."
"Aw, thunder!" muttered Ike gloom
ily to himself.
When the "heavily freighted wagon
rolled protcstlngly Into tho deep beach
sand Feather's gap lay wrapped In ut
ter solitude but for the Intruding team.
The low lying dunes were as guiltless
of a footprint as If man had never
passed that way. The other wagon
bad not come to Feather's gap.
"I knew all the time that It was
either Feather's or Coggln's," sold
Mrs. Bllsh, president of the Ladles'
Aid. "Now, driver, take us round to
Coggln's." , . '
The driver .grudgingly turned bis
horses, growling about "fool women,"
when the minister's wife spoke out
sharply, "And remember we don't pay
tou anything extra for this blunder."
"Whoa!" shouted the driver. "Pile
ut!" -: - . , ,
Tile out!" echoed Mrs. Pashley In
a scandalized voice. "We will not!
You should have found out where we
were going before you started. Drive
9a Immediately."
"It'll be a dollar more," announced
the man, with gloomy unconcern. ,
"It will not be a dollar more," de
clared Mrs. Tashley angrily. "Climb
out, everybody. I Bhall speak of this
to Mr. Tashley ." ;,
The picnickers poured quickly Into
the lake wind. Then the dinner for
the whole aowd was clawed from un
der tho driver's seat and dumped In a
little pynuuld on the ground. The learn
started off, the man muttering.
The children ran shrieking tfl the
lake, The mothers carried the dinner
and placed It In tho shade of the wil
lows. But a cry of Muck ants was rais
ed, and, as the women were already
exhausted from wading In tho deep
and, Mrs. Pashley ordered Ike to
transfer the dinner to a place of safe
ty, as If ho were the stuto militia.
"Take tho dinner out by the lake
not too near the water," directed Mrs.
Pashley, who was going about with a
pained, consecrated face as If they bad
Just been shipwrecked on a desert Is
land. For Ike tho forenoon passed gloomily
away, but he put In a good day's work
waiting on the women,
As dinner time approached they be
gan to expect the other picnickers tc
look them up, but no oue came, so Mm.
Pashley sent Ike to Coggln's gap to ask
the minister and his crowd to come to
Feather's gap to eat, as that would
save carrying tho dinner a mile.
Ike struck out through the woods
that skirted the bluffs above the amid
dunes. When be had gone about half
the distance he met Phyllis Jones.
"Hello!" bo shouted.
"Where you beenT cried Phyllis.
"Feather'a gap."
Though Phyllis had a good disposi
tion and a great capacity for work, ns ,
tare had not seen fit to bless her with
much chin, but she bad an honest free-'
kled face, and Ike considered her per
fection. ' I
"We supposed you folks bad gone to
the wrong gap, explained Phyllis, "so
the minister told me to go over and tell
Mis' Pashley that, as she bsd the din
ner, we'd all come over to Feather's
gap to eat-r If she'd ruther come"
"Mis' Pashley 'd ruther eat where
she Is, so that's settled." answered Ike
easily. Then be proceeded to forget
the other picnickers entirely.
"Lookle," be cried, producing a dingy
candy heart 'bearing In bold red letters
the suggestive motto. "Be My Honey."
"I mean worse'n that," blnted Ike
darkly, slipping the heart Into bcr
band, Immediately presenting bcr with
another saccharine sentiment, "Tours
For Eternity."
After reading this solemn promise
Phyllis Ashed out a candy heart from
her own pocket, which as a thrifty and
farslgbted young woman she may have
secreted for this very emergency, and
gave it to Ike, who read with great sat
isfaction. "I Am Tours."
"WbenT he asked briefly.
"Not till after butcberln time," an
swered Phyllis promptly and firmly.
"Aw, thunder-stop!" cried Ike, great
ly displeased. "Talk sense."
"You don't waut me very bad If you
can't wait till I'm ready. Pete Jen
ner d wait till doomsday."
"IU-I'll wait till next grass-lf you
say so," vowed the distressed dairy
man recklessly.
"No, Ike. Butcberln' time's long
enough. I'll be ready by then."
"Lookle," cried Ike, "here's a path
that leads to the lake. Let's go down."
Following this path, tbey found a
little cove sheltered from the world by
high clay ridges that shut them com
pletely from view of either gap. nere
tbey sat hand In band watching the
waves and, growing hungry, lunched
on t whole bag of amorous worded
sweets that Ike produced from a bulg
ing pocket.
"Maybe we ought to look the others
up," suggested Phyllis after a long Bea
ton of blissful munching.
"Aw, thunder no!" objected Ike.
"There might be something to do
omewhercs," she added vaguely.
"I dono It all," Ike assured her.
In tho meantime the minister's wife
and her satellites waited Impatiently
for Ike and the other picnickers.
"Let's feed these children nnd eat
ourselves," suggested Mrs. Jenncr.
"No," an Id Mrs. Paahlcy emphatical
ly. "The others might not like It"
"Mis' Teters would have a fit If we
et without her," declared Mrs. Bllsh.
"Let's all go over to Coggln's gap and
then send Ike and Brother Pashley
back bore for the dinner."
"No. If we go, we'll take the dinner
with us," said Mrs. Pashley. "Albert's
chest Isn't strong."
"It's n long walk to tug all these
victuals." sighed Mrs. Bllsh. .
"But I guess it's the only thing to
do," replied Mrs. Pashley. "Mrs. Jen
ner, you get the children together and
we'll go."
They went through the woods, as Ike
had gone, for that was the shortest
way.
At last they filed thankfully down
the crooked path Into Coggln'a gap.
But the Rev. Mr. Tashley and his hah
of the crowd were not there.
"Where's Ike?" burst out Mrs. Bllsh
as she snt cumbrously down on the
sand to rest in the shade of an ant
covered willow.
"And Where's Brother Tashley and
the rest gone to?" exclaimed Mrs. Jen
ner. "Well, they've gone," declared Mrs.
Jenner, "and we can't help it So we'd
Jest better unjack these victuals double
quick."
"No, no; It won't do at all!" cried
Mrs. Pashley sharply as several wo
men, anxious to feed the s clamoring
children, fussed over the baskets.
"Put those covers on again," com
manded the mlnlster'a wife. "Mr.
Pashley and tbo others will probably
come In a few minutes."
But nobody appeared, and they be
gan to think that the crowd must have
gone to Feather's gap by the wagon
road or the beach and that they had
missed them.
It was long past dinner time and the
shadows were beginning to lengthen
when the woebegone party, still ably
commanded by the minister's wife, re
traced their steps to Feather's gap.
Hut not a vestige of the other party
r Ike was to lie fftuud there.
"Now, If you'll take my advice, Mrs.
Pashley, we'll eat a snack," urged Mrs.
Jenner as they dumped the dinner In
the sand at Feather's gap.
"We'll do do such thing." retorted
the minister's wife. "I shan't bar it
aid that I meddled with the dinner."
The children, too tlrpij and hungry
to piny, dropped languidly on the warm
sand or tried to drown their sorrows
In copious drafts of witm lake water.
"I'm going home," said Mrs. Jenner
firmly, after another Litter season of
fruitless waiting. "I shall take the In
'fant class and my five and go. The
rest of you can do what you please,"
She would have opened her own bas
ket and fed tho children, but It con
tained only sour pickles and cubbnge
salad, and she dared not thrust such
food on the empty stomachs of the In
fant class, not to mention her own five.
"I thought we'd have a man to help
as," fretted the minister's wife, "but,
no; I send Ike on an errand, nnd that's
the last of him."
"I should think that Brother Pashley
would do something," observed Mrs.
Jenner.
Mrs. Pashley lot this remark pass In
silence. "We will all go home now,"
she announced In a tired voice. , "That's
all we can do. Each one carry some
thing." And again they were marshal
ed along, but this time it was toward
home.
They had planned to walk back, for
the Sunday school could not afford to
ride ltb ways. Dresrlly tbey snalled
long. A mllo passed by, and its
weary length seemed stretched to half
dozen.
As these picnic toilers rounded a
bend In the road that now led through
treeless, open fields tbey beheld as In
vision a dispirited company halted
by the dusty roadside for a rest In the
hot sun.
It was the Rev. Albert Pashley, the
formidable Mrs. Peters, several otber
matrons and a dozen or more glum chil
dren, all sitting dejectedly on the grass
dangling their tired feet In dry ditch.
The Rev. Albert arose as spokesman
for this disgruntled assembly. "Where
have you been?" be Inquired ongra
clously of his wife, as If she and ber
crowd were the offending ones.
"Looking nnd waiting for you all
day long." replied Mrs. Tashley coldly
"Where's Tbyllls Jones?" asked Mrs,
Peters, coming forward. "We sent her
to tell you that we'd come to Feather's
gap and eat dinner with you, but she
didn't come back. So we went over
there, but you was gone. Then we
went back to Coggln'a again, and final
ly we started home."
"We ain't none of us saw Phyllis,"
returned Mrs. Jenner. "But Where's
Ike Clutner?"
"None of us has seen him," answered
the minister.
"The only thing to do now la Jest to
unpack these victuals double quick,"
began Mrs. Jenner.
"Land sakes!" broke in Mrs. refers
hrilly. "Ain't you folks et yetr
"No, ma'am," answered Mrs. Bllsh
Icily.
"Well, of nil fool things!" commented
Mrs. Peters. "Totin all that truck all
day long and not eatln' your .share!"
"Fm aurprlsed, Mrs. Pashley," said
OKDKRBD THH FOOD DUMPED ON THB
OBOUHD.
the minister, "that you didn't take the
Initiative here. At least you could
have fed these little ones"
"That's what I said all the time," In
terrupted Mrs. Jenner.
"It has been tea hours since I myself
ate," he concluded solemnly, referring
to his watch.
"Why, I thought It would be nicer
to eat together," began Mrs. Pashley,
but nobody seemed to hear her.
For Mrs. Peters ordered all the food
dumped on tbw gswwd by the roadside.
The ravenous ! chftfren squatted
quickly before the delayed 4'nner. The
older people lowered themselves to the
ground awkwardly, but gratefully.
Then the Rev. Albert asked the short
est picnic blessing on record, and the
meal began by the dusty roadside.
At last around a bend In the road,
hand In hand, came Ike and Phyllis.
Ike's pockets were bulging with stones
and his face wore a satisfied grin.
Phyllis showed a nervouB tendency to
giggle,' . .
'You're great folks!" cried Mrs, Pe
ters. "Wbcre've you been?'
"Back aplocc," replied Ike boldly.
"We sort of lost track of time," con
fessed Phyllis guiltily.
We've most of us been there our
selves," the Rev, Albert remarked gen
ially, with an added unction In bis
voice in view of the possible wedding
fee.
"Aw, thunder!" grunted the red faced
Ike, who didn't know what else to
My.
She Acquiesced.
The wife of one of the directors of
the line was a passenger. Hbe was a a
Imperious woman, accustomed to hav
ing her own way, and when the ship
began to roll she sent forthwith for th
captain. A steward came Instead.
She scorned the steward and demandel
the captain's presence Immediately.
The purser was the next sacrifice and
after he, the third officer and the Bent
officer bad all retired discomfited, with
a flea In the ear, as the saying la, the
captain came. By tbls time the rolling
bad Increased, and the lady's voice
was beginning to sound far away.
"I wish you to stop this rolling at
once," sbo said to the captain.
"Madam," said the captain, "a bin.
as you know. Is feminine, aod U aba
wants to roll I fear that I ca no more
top her than I could help coming here
when you wished to see me."
It was a naive bit of flattery directed
at ber weakest point and, despite the
green tinge of her complexion that fore
told an immediate attack of mal de
tner, the woman smiled.
"Very well, sir," she faintly murmur
ed, closing her eyes. "It let her
roll."-New York Sun.
FALL FROM GREAT HEIGHTS.
Th Sensation Described by One Who
Experienced It
A German scientist. Professor Albert
rielm, w ho fell over a precipice in the
Alps, but lived to tell the tale, makes
that story a very encouraging account
to those with an Inclination to high
Jumps and the like.
His fall was only seventy feet yet
that would be more than enough to
satisfy a temperate person. HIa story
Is full of Interesting detail.
At first he seemed to himself to be
flying through the air. Ills fall really
could have occupied only a few sec
onds, but his train of thought was
long and full of Interesting details.
"I clearly saw," he says, "the possi
bility of my fate. . I said to myself.
'The rocky wall from which I am now
being hurled prevents my seeing what
Is at Its base. The snow may be melt
ed there or there may be none. If
there is any. my life may be saved.
Otherwise death is inevitable.
" 'If I a m conscious on reaching the
earth. I hove by me a bottle of aro
matlcs and my alpenstock. I will
grasp it. for it may serve me In good
stead.' I thought, too, of removing my
eyeglasses lest their splintering might
cause injury.
"Other and geutler thoughts for those
I was to leave behind came upon me.
For myself I felt indifferent caring
really little whether I should be much
injured or not, but from motives of
consideration for others I felt Impell
ed, as it were, to make light of the
matter. I seemed to call aloud, 'I am
not much hurt!'
"I recollected that In five days more
I was to have delivered an inaugural
discourse and thought of the grief my
death would cause to those near and
dear to mo. Anon. lying, "as It were, on
tbo limit of a far distant horizon, ap
peared distinct and divers images and
episodes of my past life. The whole
mental picture stood out clear cut and
Illumined by divine and mysterious
light
"All things seemed lovely and of
good report. There were no misgiv
ings, no anxieties, no sorrow, pain or
terror.
, "There were no sensations of contest
or strife. All was merged in feelings
of genial good will and kindly feeling.
Such feelings predominated over all
and formed what was truly a unique
and lovely picture.
"Gradually u heaven of glorious blue
flecked with crimson clouds of gossa
mer lightness surrounded me. In them
I was wafted to and fro, borne up from
below, but painlessly and pleasantly,
while a vast and moving snow field
seemed to accompany roe. Anon the
perception of objects, subjective
thoughts, a medley of various feelings,
seemed to circle in concentric mazes
around as a common center.
."Then came a dull thud, which I
heard very distinctly, but did not feel,
and my fall was ended. At that in
stant a dark veil passed before me.
"I called aloud three or four times '1
am not much hurt,' grasped my glass
es, which lay uear me, and touched my
limbs to make sure they were not
broken.
"Then I saw my companions slowly
approaching. They told me a good half
hour had elapsed after my fall before
I spoke.
"I had lost consciousness, and that
explains the dark veil. Later the pow
er of thinking returned. I was con
scious only so long as I was falling of
the perception of beautiful images. At
tho moment of contact with earth they
disappeared."
Ou another occasion Dr. Helm was
Injured In a carriage accident He said
that be distinctly heard and counted
the bone fractures seven In all
which he received. He quotes the evi
deuce of an Italian who bad a similar
experience. Gateway.
Fisher Brothers Company
SOLE AGENTS
Barbour and Finlayion Salmon Twini and Netting
MtCormick Harvesting Machines
Oliver Chilled Plough
Malthoid Roofing
, Sharpies Cream Separators
Raecolith Flooring Storrett' Tool
Hardware, Groceries, Ship
Chandlery
Tan Bark, Blue Stone, Muriatic Acid, Welch Coal, Tar,
Ash Oars, Oak Lumber, Pipe and Fittings, Brass
Goods, Paints, Oil and Glass
Fishcccn's Pure Manilla Rope, Cotton Twine and Seine Web
We Want YoHr Trade
FISHER BROS.
BOND STREET '
SAVE A DOCTOR BILL
BY DRINKING BASS' ALE AND
GUINESS STOUT WITH YOUR
DINNER PUT UP IN NIPS. IT
IS A SYSTEM BUILDER, RECOM
MENDED BY ALL PHYSICIAN
PRICE, $1.50 PER DOZEN.
AMERICAN IMPORTING CO.
589 Commercial Street
THE O EM
C. F. WISE, Prop.
Choice Winea, Liquors Merchant Loach Trem r
and Cigara 11:30 a. ntto 1:30 f.m,
Hot Lunch at AH Honrs. S Cents
Corner Eleventh and Commercial.
ASTORIA, - - - . OREGOU
i THE TRENTON i
First-Class Liquors and Cigars
I
Corner Commercial and 14th.
FREE TRIAL
IRONING DAY is a picnic day with
an
ELECTRIC IRO
FITS ANY SOCKET .
FITS ANY POCKET
ASK US ABOUTjIT
ASTORIA ELECTRIC CO.
Sherman Transfer Co.
HENRY SHERMAN, Manager.
Hacks, CarriagesBaggage Checked and Transferred Trucks and Furniture
Wagons Pianos Moved, Boxed and Shipped.
433 Commercial Street - - Main Phone 121
First National Bank of Astoria, Ore.
ESTABLISHED 1886.
Capital
J. Q. A. BOWLBY, President FRANK PATTON, Cashier
O. I. PETERSON, Vice-President J. W. GARNER, Assistant Cashier
Astoria Savings Bank
Capital Paid in $115,000. Surplus and Undivided PioSta, flCD,c:3
Transacts a General Banking Business Interest Paid ou Time Dfjo;-"
FOUR PER CENT PER ANNUM.
: ! Eleventh and Daane Eta. : . Astoria, irta.
602 Commercial Street
. ASTORIA, OREGON X
ClOO.OOO