Image provided by: University of Oregon Libraries; Eugene, OR
About The morning Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1899-1930 | View Entire Issue (March 5, 1906)
MONDAY, MARCH j, 190O.
THE MORNING ASTORIAN. ASTORIA, OREGON.
Tlio German Cobbler
Tells Some Stories
How llie Fairy Assisted an Old Wo
manNancy nnJ llic Won
derful Cold Grain,
((VpyrlKlil, l!iS. ly MiI'Iui-p, I'Mlllim A f'o )
OM', iliiy ln ii u woman ahoiil
II fly yi'iimt ulit bring In s
iiIhm In it up iiihI nI(i
down 11111I mii'Iih mill "I'riiin tu
ft-il Imil I it'll Iiit iIIn iliirj ;
"I hull iiiuii 11 linn- ili'ir 1 1 1 11 wniu
Uli ttlm hint got In li fi'i'fly year old
HUf Uiiih 11 married woman, hut nIi-
llllll't IlltVli IIIUi'll lit) pi l ik-mm lull lu't
IiiinIiIUiiI. Shi work hard, Ulld hIii'
Uvi'N iior, uinl iiul unit time III II v
years doe ntiM go hy der theater or a
picnic Omit In n great while (the
laugh, hul moat always she lni tear
lu her eyes."
"Vliy, tl vlutM shuat llko my cac,"
ay dcr WolUSIl.
1 )n poor woman keep rlicht on be
In k sail," t ttnyn, "und ahe dmi belief
1 . '
Wi" iHn) wiiihnh, nrtwifT wn Koiutowr
sin OiIII I'M T lirtvi soiim guml time 111
ill world, vhi-ii win goc out In dor for
ivnI mil' ihiy lu gnHier fugola. Klin
Willi i iil'iilinil Uinl illt dii kI Ii Uh,
mill hiiiih' tear vim In her eye vlii'ti n
li'i'ili' nli l come mil of di-r bimhe uinl
MH'llll llol Hill! Mil)';
" 'My good woman, but why dl bor
" I'.i'riiiiHit my liiiMhniiil . linn not v nut
(') Mi'', uinl I vhiu nil oil woman. Nut
inn' t line III my Hfi' li t go to 11 i lrrUN
or have mim! 11 wnl it mlt h o rreum In It.
If I IimiI 11 phro of clothesline I should
hung inyMi-lf to a tree.'
" 'Huy imt ,' r'illi'il dot leetle gal.
'I Iti'i'ii my iy on you for 11 Ionic tiim',
Von vim iiitli'iil, Uinl hardworking,
uinl now ynii shall h rewarded, One,
two, thiee, unit, presto, change!'"
"I'lul ilen lnit take plnee'i" link
( 1 1 T Wlllllllll of llll',
"Vlii'ti, dot person goes home to Hud
dot hi'l' Iiiin!iiiiii fall off ihT dock mid
vim drowinit, Peri" vhaa 11 cnrrliigi 11 1
der door, iiml In dot carriage vim 11
member of der beef trilM llo vhti
conn' lo k her to marry him, mid to
any dot he vim .worth f pi ihsi.ihk) mid
w mid fundi In-r life :i perfect paradise
on eiirih '
",Hhe mIhiiiii Into der carriage mid
KiMM iivhny uinl vim wed. Khe liim lid
limiccr feefty yeiii old, hul thirty. Slit
no loiii'er hit Ki'iiy hull unit wtliikle,
hut vim ho IiiiihIhouih dot nil dry j,'oiI
Htoie Itllll.e her 11 dlMcolilit of o iir
cent, III olie yenr he K'x Nlllljiiril
full mid ten ciiviiKf uinl feeft) Iheii
tcr Hhe ha ten ciirrlnceH, 11 hundred
drcHie mid Nlxfy xerviilil, Hhe icoch
hy dcr nice uinl he! $l.ni."
"t'lul vim dot lectio Kl In der for
t n fully?" nk der woinnn.
"Slip vim, tun vlmt hIu doif) for one
woimiii hIii cnti do for (mother. You
don't I111 vi to en out In der foritit. Shunt
nit down it! home mid he io"d uinl dot
fairy i nn find you."
I'nd vhcii dot woiiiinit (joi- avhay he
vha Nuillliiic tmd IjuiiiiiiIihc to herHclf
Uinl inore hnpiiy dun for lx inontlm.
HIu know It vhu only 11 iory, hut It
chiter her oop und tirlm; new hopo.
ftot miun day a Iccile girl nhoiit ten
yenr old conic In to g''t Iter tntidder'ft
atioe fixed. Hi-r hum! und face vha
dirty und her dre rBKKcd. Kin vim
wad dot. (tin hnv to hrlnir ihr tdioo.
oney and Tar
Charles Rogers, Drulst.
The Astorian Wants 50O New Subscribers
And in Order to Do This the Price Has Been
Be Loyal to Your Town and Begin the New Year by
Taking Astoria's Greatest Paper, The Astorian
DELIVERED BY CARRIER TO ANY PARTOFTHE CITY
FOR eB CENTS
una aho Voat tain to tno. I wait Ave
minute und don I begin:
"(mi limn (lore vliiiw a Iw tlo girl unrl
her nflttio vtiaa Nancy. HI10 vtina dor
diiuichtcr of poor pitreiiln, und nho
wonra old cloUiea und noffor gooa on a
Hiifidtty achool picnic or ride on dor
merry go round. Ilor fnddor don't cnr
for her, und her muddor Rive tier null
ninny hIi ton cuff on dor oar every
"lot' der vim y It vlnta mlt mo,"
Miiy dor lectin jclrl, "I"' tlnikin her
"I)l lrl dot I toll you about 1io
don't llko It n bit, but vbflt can nho do?
Hho eric und crlo. Imt dot vlum no
Kooil. If her fiidder find hor wijeplnic
ho awoar nt her, unit If tier muddor
find hor hIio kIvcm her ten cuff und a
alnp. Hho I not old enouich to Kot
mitrrh-d, und If aim run iivhny dor
pollci hrluic her buck."
"Jiint my ciimo, old tnaii," ny dor
girl tiilt dcr altoc, "but you can hot
your life I'm not Kolnir to put up with
It much loiiKor."
"Iori vha no hMpplnin Air dor Klrl
In my alory, und every uljcht vhin ahn
goea to boil hIio vlHhea alte vha dead.
On" night aim vtiua K'iIhk to oat Home
Hounded Khma, lot loot le old woman
mlt a kind fact aaddenly appeared at
r tted!d und aald:
"'Stop, my child. Don't you know
dot pounded gin vhlll aend you to d
" 'Hut dere la vbero I llko to go.'
"'Foollab. h-etlo girl. I Lave knowu
all about you for a year. I vbaa a
fairy, und your aulTerliiKa vbna oafor
Here vha a box of cold cream und 6
look I iik Khi. Vlien I vha Kone nil
der ireani on your chin un.l look Intr.
der nhit If you uliould ever vim nt t(.
ace me UKflill telephone to "O. K." 01
Jay at reel.' '.'
-(',,, I tlmt mitri, ltiititifiiiMl V" flukei
1 , . ......
dcr lectio Kill mlt der Hhoe,
" hcll, Nfincv rubbed dor cream on
Iter chin und looked In der rIukm, und
' behold, clie vha i haiiKeil Into one ot
dcr hiimlnoiucKl uinl aweeteat glrla ol
elk'tilcen you ever aaw. Hy her bod
vim twenty beautiful drtne, llllt half
to imitili. mid der dliimoud Jewelry
made her cry out mlt pleasure."
' Imt vim 11 jolly, lint Ko on."
"Xituey vha looking lit der droKKet
und diamond vhen alio auddenly file.
tliioiiL'li der air, iiml ti'mr oop tu
The genuine fs
In a Yellow
HERE YOU ARE
the Month For 65c
From 75c to
paiacc. iter tniMhainr vtina ner?, hi
vha a beautiful man, wld no bow tc
hi le. I " re vha gold und allver
uinl fried (iyater, und (ce crefini, und
nngel cake. Jiere vim horaea and cur
rlaicea und aerviint. mid dero vhaa nc
baker to come iiIoiih und any dot If id
bill wnan't paid onp he woold cut oO
dor bread. It vha hIiiihI happy happl
lie, und Nancy lived to he one boon
ered year old und enjoyed herelf ev
"I'nd do you think dot may happen
to hip?" fink my leetle cuatomer.
"Vhy not? If It can happen to one
leetle Klrl, vhy not to another'"
"Dot vhu o. lo you belief dot old
woman fairy will come tonight?"
"I can't any, hut you musU be on dot
"You bet I vhaa on dcr watch, und
aim II I tell you vlmt vhlll happen If I
vhaa eliaiigod oafor und get all do
tiling? 1 toll fiidder inn muddor und
der old crowd 10 go to der tuyvel und
ho banged to 'cm. und if tley ever come
on my atreet I'll whittle for der police
und dor hurry up wagon, (ioodby, old
mini. Dot atory of your vhaa nil aour
milk, und I don't belief a word of It,
but you have a kind heart, und I thank
you all dor aame."
Und ahe goc nvay whiatllng und
aklpplng, und 1 know ahe half believe
dot aome good thing I going to happen
Half an hour later 1 fat womamt
cornea In to get a cement patch on a
ahoe. My, but ahe vha fat! She vhaa
ao big ahe can hardly get In der door.
Vlieu uhu tella me vhat ahe wauta und
alt. down I begin:
"One time di re vhaa a good woman
mlt a aorrow. She vhaa aoocb a good
woman dot everybody like ber, but
dot aorrow vha ever at hand to bring
teara to her eye."
"Vbaa you telling m a fairy atory?"
"Vbell. dot vha nil right So dcr
woman had n aorrow, eh?"
"Khe did. It vhaa der aorrowest Bor
row In der world."
"Vbell, trot It out and let's hear vhat
It vhua. Did ahe Lave a drunken bua-
"A game leg?"
"Wasn't ahe loved?"
"In a vhay. yes. but her aorrow vhaa
her futnesa. She vhaa der fattest wo
mans on der block. It took her ten
mlnutea to get Into lied, und vhen ahe
fell out again der whole house ahook.
"I vhaa going on to tell how a fairy
came one day and blew dot fatness
away und gave dot womans der form
of a aylph, but before I could do ao she
chumps oop uud hiu me a cuff on der
ear und grabs der aboe und sails out
und vhen ahe vhna on der sidewalk ahr
shakes her nt at roe nnd shouts:
'"fih, you old Dutchman, hut If 1
vhna n man Instead of a frail girl 1
don't let tin till I break every bone In
your body:"' M. Qf'AD.
Joey Kaklmo fJlve me a bite of your
Madge Kklmo-No, I won't;
Joey Hakimo-All right, you! Didn't
I let you drink half the oil when
booked the lamp out of the mlalori
Sunday school? - Puck.
Might He True.
"Honeaty I the heat policy," remark
ed the quotation fiend.
"Portia pa you are right," rejoined the
skeptical peraon. "Anyway, an In
surance policy ln't always the beat
ho nea t y ." ( ,'h lea go No w n.
"Did you enjoy the musicals laat
"Very much. I spent the evening In
the conaervptory with the prettiest girl
In attendance."- Chicago Itecord-IIer
Rome Painful f .
"Do you think It I possible to lore
two glrla at the aame time?"
"Possible? Some follows have a hard
time trying not to." Detroit Fre
"A Square Mral."
I I , v w
The Our True I.orr.
Tou may talk of your for women.
You may talk of your love for pelf,
But the only true and stpa'lfant lovs
Is the love fr on own aclf.
Mtw York Press.
The type of the cow has just as much
to dD with milk giving capacity In pro
portion to feed consumed n the form
of the horse does in making oi him a
wasteful or an economical feeder. We
have all seen slab sided, leggy horse.-f
that requirisl a barnful of hay and fif
ty ears of corn a day to till up. There
Is the same difference In cows. It pays
the farmer to be able to judge of the
value of cows by the animal's form
dairy form. Farm and Ranch.
"IT SAVED MY LIFE"
PRAISE FOR k FAMOUS MEDICINE
Mr. Wlliadsen Tells How She Tried Lydlt
E. Pinkham'i Vegetable Compound Jost
In Time. ,
Mrs. T. C. Wlliadsen, of Manning,
Iowa, writes to Mrs. Pinkbam:
Dear Mrs. Pinkham :
" 1 can truly aay that yon have saved my
Ufa, and I cannot express my gratitude U
you In words.
' Before I wrote to you, telling you how t
felt I had doctored for over two years steady
and spent let of money on mclicines besides,
but it all f 1 : U-d to help me. My monthly pe
riod had ceasid and I suffered much pain,
with fainting spells, headache, backache and
bearinglown pains, and I was so weak I
could hardly keep around. As a last resort
I deddfid to write you and try Lydia E. Pink
ham's Vegetable Compound, and I am so
thankful that I did, for after following your
Instructions, which you sent me free of all
charge, I became regular and in perfect
health. Had it not been for yon I would h4
Id my grave to-day.
" I sincerely trust that this letter may lead
every suffering woman in the country to
write you for help as I did."
I When women are troubled with ir
regular or painful periods, weakness,
diaplacementor ulceration of an organ,
that bearing-down feeling, inflamma
tion, backache, flatulence, general de
bility, indigestion or nervous prostra
tion, they should remember there is
one tried and true remedy. Lydia E,
Pinkham's Vegetable Compound at one
removes such troubles.
No other female medicine in the world
ha3 received such widespread and un
qualified endorsement. Kefuse all sub
stitutes. For 25 years Mrs. Pinkham, daughter-in-law
of Lydia E. Pinkham, has under
ir direction, and since her decease.
been advising sick women free of
Charge. Address, Lynn, Mass,
The Best Cough Syrup.
S. L. Apple, ex-Probate Judge, Ot
tawa Co., Kansas, writes: "This is to
say that I have U5?d Ballard's Hore
hound Syrup for years, and I do not
hesitate to recommend it as the best
couch syrup I have ever used." 25c 50a
and $1.00. ijoid by Hart's drug store.