V
MONDAY, OCTOBER 30, 1903.
THE MORNING ASTORIAN. ASTORIA, OREGON.
THAT PESKY BAR
Br Lloyd Roberti, Copyright, 19 03, by Lloyd Roberts.
W
HEN Baralt Ann Jolmwy ami
Miry Ann, bcr llttl n-ypnr-oM,
rvtiirinil from tlx
hajrnVM to "Itllo" ritp of
t and to brat up mm of la'nim for
1 pa i Andy U Inula, the "help," tlirj
were "mljfhty took aback" to flml a
. blatk bear, big aa life and twlc n
natural, sitting 011 their klt-hn floor
aixl iN-nrfully llrklug tin- lnt rem
nanU of the antlrlpatM dliitirr from
NolT hla clumay pawa.
Now, Sarah Add waa nt "akwriNl."
ttmiicb It did "fetch ber sort of eiuMrti
like" not abe. "Kb Jut up nul
thought of all tba mean, low down
tblnjra that blamed critter hnt Imimi
adolu shout property - klllln' abwp.
upKettln her bee bouaea, twin down
the graperlnes and land know w-lmt
hk rtvnn a oaluk or aoArt watei
in TUB ANIMAL'S racs.
all bealdim,' while a rreat rail" welld
up in her uaually (rntU heart, and II
awned a If a vengeance awlft and
terrible waa aUiut to deacend upon
thin innocent, aleepy bioklng cnature.
Uke a llaah ahe aprang to a low
bench Juat Itmlde the door, aelxed a
waiu bavlu In both hauda and flung a
gullon of aoapy water full In tba anl
mal'i face. Hplutterlng and growllug,
the bear retreated Into a back room,
and lira. Johncey baatlly alammed th
door upon her unwelcome rlaltor, ef
fectually cutting off hla meana of ea
cape.
Thta accomplUhed, ahe turned to
Mary Ann, wbo had been alandlog al
out aide watching the performance
with atarlng eyea and aerioua face, and
apoke to her abarply: "Now, Jeat yei
look here, Mary Ann, and mind whul
I'm a-aayln' to yer. Hit right down
there on that atoop, and don't yer move
till I git back and don't yer let bo out
coma In, for there'a a awful growed
up b'ar In tbot back room thet would
Jeat love to eat a-h aa you. I'm a go
in' to git yer pa to come and kill II
dpad. Now, mind what I tell jort'
And, with a parting gltince at tho par
lor door, die climbed a anake fence
and hurried aero a field of atubble,
dlxappeurlng behind a low hill.
Mary Anu aat dutifully where, ahe
waa put, with her amall mind full ol
thoughts of tba "big doKKle," till nIii
aw the tall figure of her pa come
bounding over the rise, followed a uio
njeut later by ma, and then Andy val
lautly waving hayfork above hla
head.
When they had all collected In th
kitchen Jabcs auddeuly grabbed hla
bend, while a queer exprawlon spread
over his honeat countenance. "Harab
Ann Johneay, If yer ain't the big bead
edeat, all around atupldeat female beln'
that ever milked a cowl IK you know
(what yer gone and done? Ye've cooped
up the b'ar right along In the aatne
room aa my gun, and then yer cal'late
thet I'm a-gotn' ter ahoot him. If tbet
ain't the women folk fer yerl"
Sarah Ann looked blank. "If we only
tied known In time we could V got
lend of Joe Banaen'a gun, but I
reckon aa how be look It along when
be went pa'trldge klllln' out back eet
tlement way," abe answered In aclf
defense.
Meanwhile Andy bad aneaked around
the house and bad cautloualy peaked
In the parlor window "to gtt squint
at the pesky brute," only to discover
that the room waa empty, lie rushed
back with wild excitement "Jabo,
Jabe!" he abouted. "lie ain't tharl He
ain't tharl lie's up and cleared out, I
tell yer!"
Barab Ann turned with fury on Mary
Ann. "What have yer gone and doot
with thet there b'ar, Mary Ann Johne
ay, tbet I left yer so careful-like ter
keep yer eye on when I waa a-fetcbln'
yer pat Now, none of yer lyln' ter ,
but apeak op quick!" And ahe grabbed
her by the arm and shook her vigor
ously. 1
"I didn't 4o' nuffln'-I dldn't-I dldnl
-I dldn'tr Mary Ann walled In
plerctor voice, and the Inst wall waa
till on the move aa the others entered
tts sou for a JoVci .insesjaji.
"It do seem u II lit iiih. Jf.n tuenvt.
away.' wunjM-ff-'i rniiio Ana in an
a went ruck vkce n they peered through
the cruek of the mHIiU)' ocued door.
"Where eould lie Imve got terY"
' They iMMtii ilUcmwnl hla retreat. At
one alile of the riu a trnp dNir led
down thiiiicrli Die flmr Into the cold.
dnrk rellur Im!hw, mul Mr. Jutiueay
hud f uncut to -oe It after her lust de
scent. Anw:i), there limn; the gun
alxivi the m.mtfjiii, 11 ml ohe vigor
otinly tlinul hi't IiiiImihI Into the room.
"Laud nlive! Hurry up. pit, iiikI ilrlvt
the varmint out of thet or he'll hnvt
e't up all the winter butler! Oh, he's
gone ti ml done It now!" xhe shrieked as
a loud crit!i son:tel from Im-Iow. "1
knew he would!"
.label strode bravely forward and
wits Jiiit reuehlng dawn the old fash
toned muzzle lu:Kler wheu the beat
emericed from the trnp nnl ambled
awlftly for the imii ijuor.
If bruin thought that he was going
to em-fii so raolly, with the weight of
all hla uln tiwni hU bead, he was vast
ly mlHtaken. Harsh Ann lend out
and alammed the l'xr In hla face. A
man, a ltir huI a gun shut together In
space eight feet square! It looked
very much a If something ought to
happen, ysltes thought so too.
"Holy pokers, Huruh! Open that door
quick r he shouted.
"Moot him, shoot him!" answered
Mrs. Johnesy. "He'll git out If I open
the door."
"tjol darn If. let blm git out!" the
farmer shunted back. "I'm tin blamed
b'ar hunter, and I ulu't a goln' to be
neither!" And then, us this seemed
InefftN-tual, a bright lnplratlon flashed
through his drain. "!' yer want blood
and b'ur's grease messed nil over yen
parlor fl'Mir, Huruh. fr there will Ik If
yer don't look real smart?"
The door Hew open on the Instant,
while Mrs. Joliie-xy. having removed
iers4 If to 0110 side, plpi-d up in another
tune:
"Itoii't yer hit hlin-Uou't yer bit him.
Jabet! Iet hliu git outer the bourn1
first."
Ilut the beur In (he tneatitline bad
rhangd his mind and Instead of "git
tin' out" sut In the doorway growllug
and making face st MMir old Johnesy,
whose uu wss drawing invisible hiero
glyphics In the air.
Now, when the hear had made his ap
pearance from bcluw the valiant Andy
bud sqiieened in ttetween the hot stove
ami the wall and seated himself in a
large farther, dish of dotteh which Ha
rsh Ann had put there to "raise." The
good woman suddenly spied a pitch
fork and a perspiring red face alnive
the water kettle, and ahe hurled an ap
peal to the "help:"
"My land, Andy, git and drive the
b'ar out of (here before pa messes bis
dirty carcass all over my clean floor!"
But pa had taken hla loving wife's
advice and waa now in the cellar, with
the trapdoor clapped to behind him.
With some difficulty Mr. Johnesy was
extricated from hla retreat by means of
a very narrow window that led Into
the potato bin, and they all withdrew
themselves to distance to encourage
the departure of the guest
"If yer had shot thet beast In the
tieet room In ther bouse, Jabei Johue
ay, you and I would ha' parted compa
ny next mlnut', I can Jest tell yer!"
mbU IIm l.ihnnav Slrmlv Mft ain't
ir 1 nauu l mgn Drone my uaca navin
and aUirtSe bear showed no aigna an
evacuating bis position. He knew a
good thing when he emelt it end the
house contained many good things in
the line of Jams and Jellies which tbe
thrifty housewife bad bottled for the
winter, to aay nothing of cakes and
pits and apples, and It seemed after
ward aa If bis dellfat auout had
brought to light everything that a beat
mlM love In kitchen, pantry or cellar.
Thay all stood glowering In alienee
tlutt la, with the exception of Mary
Ann. Suddenly the old farmer struck
op, while a broad grin rolled around
hla face, and he chipped bis ha ml 011
bis leK.
"I've been a thlukln' and a-thlnkln',
and I 'low as aometbln' has to le done,
nd thet real smart and I reckon asM
can do It. Come along 0' me, A inly."
And he turned and strode off In toe dl-re-tloii
of the burn.
Andy and Harsh Ann both followed,
tbe latter tugging Mary Ann by the
hnnd.
"Now, Jest yer help me eatcb tbe
critter," aald Jabes aa he climbed Into
the pigsty. And Andy obediently
obeyed.
"Land, what yer goln' to do with
Buttercup, pat" queried hla wife In
voice of astonishment
"Jest you wait end you'll aee eh!
Bhut yer squealln', yer blasted 'ldglt!
U J1A r
I'BOLT roEUIS, SABAB ! OPUf THAT DOUB
QUICK r
It all put to rights again only last fort
night" she went on, keeping her eye
on the back door as ahe spoke. "What
can be a-keepln' thet thar b'arT
"CM darn yer hide, Andy Glnnta!"
growled the Irritated farmer. "An'
what waa yer doln' all the time, I'd like
to know, while I waa a-flghtln' the
dirty brute? Under the bed up In tbe
Jqtt, 1 reckon, ytf white llvered pup!"
"Thar yer wrong. Jabes Johneay, and
ter know It I Jest kinder mislaid
m'self; thet's all," Andy retorted.
At this point poor little Mary Ann
let up dismal bowling.
"I want a cookie I want a d'lnk of
mllk-I want aomefln' to eatl Boo-00!"
tIt was caiCar c'.og nearjjwr.
rT ;
DASHKI1 KETWEEK RIR OlTRTItKTCBKD Vim.
Nothln' ain't goln to hurt yer!" This
last to Uio punlc stricken porker which
he had grabbed and atowed beneath
his arm. It waa only eight months
old.
When they bad returned to the back
yard tbe farmer gave minute direc
tions to the hired man.
"Now, see here, Andy, you Uke tht
pig around to tbe parlor window and
drop blm inside, and I'll wait out her
with the gun, and when the b'ar cbasct
out arter the pig I'll ping the brute.
Git a bike on!"
It worked perfectly-at leaat tbe first
part dld-for after a few minutes of
awful silence a terrible commotion
filled tbe house. First there waa a re
sounding crash, aa If tbe whole side
board had gone over, followed by ear
piercing aqueala and noise of falling
dishes.
Jshcx bad Just time to yell: "Git out
er the way, ma! Holy Jerusalem, hen
they come!" when the whole clrcui
came streaming out of the bouse.
Alas for the second part of tbe ar
rangements! Tbe terrified fugitive saw
the farmer and, after the bablt of pigs,
sought safety by dashing between his
outstretched legs. Jabei strove to leap
aaide, but It waa too late. Hla feet
were knocked from under him, the gun
went off Into the clouds, and pursued
and pursuer disappeared In the dis
tance. When the laat lingering squeals bad
died away Mrs. Johnesy turned to her
bewildered husband with all tbe con
tempt, not unmixed with triumph, aha
could throw into her voice:
"Who's the pig headedest, long leg
gedest, stupidest born fool now?' abe
vociferated.
Mr. Johnesy began thoughtfully to
brash the dust off hla trousera leg.
"Now, see here, Sarah Ann, didn't I
Mow as I would git tbet thar pesky
b'ar outer thar? And didn't IT
Bath I a Sesassj la Klraraaaa.
The Nlcaraguana do things In quite
primitive style. They do not put up at
cramped and questionably clean lodg
ing houaes, but camp In gypsy fashion,
high and low alike, for miles along the
shore and pass the time In morning
batbs, round games, gallops by day and
moonlight dances by night on the yel
low sands, with partners of every va
riety of color down to the laogbtng yel
low girls of the native class and the
simple Indian peasant damsels of tbe
fields. It Is a sight not soon to be for
gotten to witness the general rush to
ward the aea of carta, owners and
servants. ' The government usually die
patches an officer and a guard to super
intend the pitching of the annual camp
upon the beach, or, rather, upon the
forest covered sand ridge which frtngea
the abort. Each family rigs up Its own
cane hot lightly thatched with , palm
trees and floored with petates, or mats,
the whole wickered together with vines
or woven together basketwlse and par
titioned In the same way by means of
colored curtains of cotton cloth. The
more luxurious ladles send down their
neatly curtained beds and make some
times t certain j&ow of elegance.
A B1LB
THIMK
THIMK J?
TtC t!0Sl Pcpcfcr i WICClg-HCOWD Diced Power
GUARANTEED PURELY VEGETABLE
This is the season that tests the quality of your blood,
and if it is sot good, then evidences of it will begin to
show as the weather grows warmer. Carbuncles and boils,
pimples and blotches, and numerous itching and burning
skin eruptions will make their appearance, and are sure in
dications of bad blood. If spring-time finds yon with im
pure, sickly blood, then you are xn poor condition to with
stand the strain upon the system which always comes at this
time of the year. A failure to look after your physical wel
fare now. bv purifying the blood and toning up the gen-,
eral system, may result in a complete breaking down of (
m ' - f ie 1 1
healtn
down
mm
1
CcvOTT'O
SPECK
lotpr on ann van win nna vourseir weair ana mn j-,.;-;.-;-..
s a . -fcw ' iT k-j
' m as. v tts- -' -
, with no appetite, and a prey to indigestion and nerv &
it is Door Diooa mac mages weaic rjoaies, iotii u ' eak?fr
i
vousness.
is this vital fluid that must supply vigor and strength to our systems, and uvoa its
purity rests our chances for health. Any imparity, humor or poison in the blood acts inju
riously upon the system and affects the general health. It is to the morbid, unhealthy
matter in the blood that chronic sores and ulcers are due. The pustular and scaly
skin eruptions so common during spring and summer, show the blood to be in a riotous,
feverish condition, as a result of too much acid or the presence of some irritating humor or
acrid poison in the blood. A large per cent of human ailments have their origin in a
polluted, diseased blood, and can only beVeached by a remedy that goes into the circulation
and uproots and expels the poison and restores the blood to a healthy, natural condition. If
Springfield. Ohio. May 18, 1903. J Uhf0131 Wheeling, W. Vs., May 23, 1008.
On two oooaslona I hve "sed your ot. Da.a WOOO, and are I have used your 8. 8. 8. this spring.
8. 8. 8. in tha spring with fine results. I thinking 01 a blood pun- and found U to be blood purifier of the
can heartily recommend it aa a tonlo and r tt. i,:t, ne 000 beat order. My system was ua down
blood purifier. I waa troubled with ncr,incnininKOi O.O.O., and my Jolnta ached and pained me oon-
beadachea, indigestion and liver trouble, a remedy With a long- aiderably, and I began to fear that I was
whloh all disappeared under the nae of a, -ct-t-licl, rrmf it'tnn going to be laid np with Rheumatism. I
few bottles of yonr great blood remedy. esiaDllsnea reputation had nged a s a btfon, and know what
8. 8. 8. My appetite, which waa poor, and that has proven It- It was; ao I purchased a bottle of It, sad
waa greatly helped. I can eat anything if t a :n have taken several bottles, with the result
I want now without fear of Indigestion, 5eiI 10 spccinc 1U ais- the paJn, ,
and my blood has been thoroughly eases 01 the DlOOd, and a my blood has been cleansed and rsno-
cleansed of impurities and made rioh and c,1Tvir:ftr tnrnV flt1J vated, my general health bnOtnp, so thU
atrong again. Aa a tonlo and bleod.pur- superior wmc ana sys- x can cheerfully testify to Its vbrtttM M s
lller It Is all you claim for It. tem builder. S. S. S. COn- blood pnrlller and tonlo.
ffllZ.'1E0M,tL . tai,.ns 00 .cury, pot- la) JOHanns.
ash, arsenic or other
mineral, but is composed exclusively of vegetable ingredients, selected for their medicinal
properties and gathered from nature's store-houses the fields and forests. The thou
sands who have used S. S. S. and know from experience what it will do in blood troubles,
do not need to be reminded of a blood purifier now, for thev know no better can be found
than S. S. S. If you are thinking of a blood purifier, think of S. S. which has been
soldor nearly fifty years, while the demand is greater now than ever in its Ustory.
No remedy without merit could exist so long and retain the confidence of the people.
Write us if in need of medical advice, which is given without charge.
THE SWIFT SPECIFIC CO.Y.PAttY, ATUUfTA, OAs
JUST A MOMENT!
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