4
THE MORNING 'ASTORI AN ASTORIA, OREGON.
FRIDAY, APRIL 14, 1905.
THE MORNING ASTORIAN
Established 1873.
rablUh4 Dally (Except Monday) by
HE J. ft. OELLINGER COMPANY.
SUBSCRIPTION RATES.
By nail, per year tl 00
By mall, per month (0
By carrier, per month .......... 00
WEEKLY ASTORIAN.
By mall, per year. In advance .
.tl 00
Entered at the poatofflce at Astoria.
Oregen aa second-class matter.
IVOricr for th. daiiTennjr of Til Mounxa
airoaiui to eiUw resKtaoee or pUre of btntora
mJ a. nada by ptwtal cant or thrown M
rhoM Any imrularity In dfltrery shuuM be
UBneaoueiy reportea to loe omce or puouoauoa
Telephone Main 661.
RIDICULOUS EXCUSE. .
The most ridiculous stunt now be
Ing done on the world's stage for th
edification of Its people Is that of the
Russian authorities endeavoring to
excuse their defeat Every time they
get licked In good old country style
or chased over hill and dale like a
watermelon thief with an active bull
- dog In pursuit, they begin to fill the
clrcumuambient with explanations of
bow It all happened. As usual, it wa
"part of thetr well-planned campaign."
They appear to report Just as Httle
of he truth as possible, and so worded
that the casual or unsuspicious readet
will place exactly the opposite con
struetion on it Just as they Intended
that they ehould. Whenever they re
treat (which of late has been about all
they have done in the way of actual
' operations), whether with some little
semblance of order or pellmell In dls
orderly panic, they report that they
very "quietly retired," in order to "take
upi a stronger and more commanding
(that Is, where the Japs have lea
chance to get at them), position.'
Why they failed to "take up that
stronger and more commanding posi
tion before hostilities began, as a cap
able general would, undoubtedly do,
their report neglects to explain. Con
tinued practice is said to make one.
nearer perfect in anything; to which
he may devote his endeavors; and this
being true, the Russ must be the most
"expert explainer" on this planet. One
of the latest reports of Russian fail
ure and Inefficiency explains in con
nection with their disorderly stampede
from the Talu, that it was not the
Intent nor purpose of the Russian
forces to "Impede" the approach of
the Japanese columns, but merely to
harrass them!" Now.
What
In the name of all hades are their
scouts and skirmishing parties there
for if not to accomplish this pur
pose? Is it customary, even sensible.
to station whole regiments merely for
the purpose of "observing and harrass
Ing an approaching enemy?" Rats!
Likewise, rodents!
Medicine ayv "A blush Is a tem
porary erythema and calorific effulg
ence of the phjVrtogiwiomy, aetholo
glsed by one preceptiveness of the sen
sortum when In predicament of un
equiltbrity from a sense of shame, an
ger or other cause, eventuating In a
paresis of the vasomotor filaments of
the fsuial capillaries, whereby, being
divested of their elasticity, they are
suffused with a radiance effemenatlng
from an Intimidated praecordta.'
OUT OF THE ORDINARY.
Epitome of Anecdotes .and .Incidents
With Comments By a Layman.
There's a smell of violets and gas
in the air.
"If a court of inquiry la necessary
for the donor of every gift why not
also Investigate the recipients.
The prise-fighter we must always
have with us, If not in a fake ring
performance, then under the guise of
a bad actor.
Labor union organiser are circu
lating among the lotoatermen of the'
Maine coast trying to prove that thej
merit the name. j
ADDITIONAL LOCAL.
Try our Nob Hill special blend Cot
fee.
FOARD & STOKES CO.
There was practically no movement
of vessels along the water front yes
terday business being unusually quiet
Ray E. Mclntyre and Ellen McGuIre
of Hammond were married at that
place yesterday, Rev. L. J. Trumbull
officiating.
R. M. Gaston, at hit feed stable No.
105 14th street, offers for sale a LandU
harness machine; one butcher's wall
scales, will be sold cheap,
There Is nothing nicer for breakfast
than George's Eastern Codfish. It
coks white and tender.
FOARD St STOKES CO,
The British steamship Band hurt ar
rived In yesterday from Puget sound
ana win load flour for Japan. She
left up teh river iit the afternoon.
n. si. uaston carries a full and
complete line of wagons, buggies,
plows, harrows and all ktnJa of farm
o tool and machinery at 105 Fourteenth
The Equitable Life Assurance So- street, Astoria, Ore.
rlntv fin-tinnd have! kranrxsl a bird I
that looks like the dove of peace. but The funeral of the late E. E I'hll-
it may turn out to be a pigeon. Mips who was killed at Ft. Stevens wu
held from his late residence yesterday
afternoon at Wajrentun. The Inter
ment was at Ocean View cemetery.
"Why don't you study American
statesmanship for your model?" aske-1
the diplomat.
That's what 1 am doing," answered
President Castro. "I am now engager
In standing pat"
Free to Adults OnlyThe new treat,
ment for disease; not a patent medl-
jclne, but a rational assistant to nature.
o ine great restorer, Altl-Tone. an al
The British house of commons is ( terative and tonic. If you want to try
holding all-nightl sessions. At that 1 It free call at Hart's drug store,
rate the English common stock wll:j
soon be earning a dividend. i Andrew Hannula was examined be-
fore the board of lunacy commissioners
yestenjay afterncon ana was foun
insane enough to send to the asylum.
Mexican scientists have discovered
that the tapeworm is the deadly foe of
the tubercular bacilli. Well, they'll) He. was committed, to the asylum once
"observe and
wouldn't this make you tired?
NEW THOUGHTS.
Ella Wheeler Wilcox has started a
magazine in Chicago called New
Thoughts.' Ella has evolved from Her
brain a new religion which Is a cross
between theosophy and moonshine.
One cannot explain l and for this
reason it has made many converts.
Some people go wild over that which
is not easily understood. Ella does not
make her home In Chicago. She 1
too aesthetic for that The Bunga
low holds here In the summer tlm
and there she gathers all the new lions
cowboy poets, straggling authors and
struggling musicians. A quaint, quick
witted and audacious litle woman is
Mrs. Wilcox. One million blubber Inn
maidens gulp down her poems of pas
sion, one million spinsters read her
treatises on "How to Rear Babies"
and all the theorfophlsts in the coun
try look upon her as divinely gifted.
Gertrude Atherton should cultivatt
Ella Wheeler Wilcox's loving grace
and learn to grow ol4 without a mur
mur. Ella Isn't old, but she expects to
be some day.
have to fight It out in the open, that'
all.
I see that President Roosevelt had
abandoned his tariff reform ideas."
"That so?"
'He told the Mothers' congress that
he believed in encouraging Infant in
dustries."
The effojrts to pour oil on th
troubled waters of the Equitable com.
pany may prove temporaxly effectual,
but the sizzling lava of the Frenzied
Finance volcano will doubtless con
tlnue to slop around the Equitable
crater.
Brother Holder of the Jackson Her
ald, is right. We love to read the
weekly newspapers, for we got our
"fetching up" as a- printer and new
hunter on one of them. The most de.
lightful years of our life were spent
trying to keep our ownership of
country weekly out of reach of thi
sheriff! '
Mrs. Chadwlck having been sentenc
ed for swindling certain bankers It
would be eminently Just and proper
for the government to prosecute and
punish the certain bankers who robbed
Mrs. Chadwlck when, cashing her pa.
per.
The Dealer Here's just the knife
you want to buy, sir, to take on your
fishing trip. It haa five blades and a
corkscrew.
The Angler Haven't you on with
less blade and er more corkscrews?"
WILL PAT LICENSE.
Barnum & Bailey's circus will pitch
its tent In Portland, Ore., In August,
the advance agent having finally
agreed to the license charge of $300
per day. He protested loudly at first
nga!nt purh a tax, but upon Investi
gation discovered that Ringling Bros.,
upon their last visit to Seattle, were
forced to-pay $750 pr day. Whlk
agreeing to the Portland rate an effort
Is being made to have an ordinance
passed in Seattle to cut the license to
$250. Circuses take a gTeat dal of
money out of a community ligltimate
fy and bring In their wqke a gang of
"sure-thing" men, pickpockets, petty
larcenlsts and other gentry who also
levy tribute. A good, stiff lk'ene fee,
Just short of prohibitory, I if the prop
er one to Impose.
PATHOLOGY OF BLUSHING.
Southerners will learn with no lit.
tie local pride that one of their medi
cal Journals has explained the patho
logy of blushing in technical language
that could never have been surpassed
by a Boston medical Journal. Southern
Attention W. O. W.
All members of Climax camp, Wood
men of the World, are requested to
attend, the funeral of our late neigh
bor, S. H. Maddock, which takes place
from Grace church at 5 p. m. this
Friday, April 14.
W. H. SNOW.
Consul Commander.
The members of the Astoria Wo
man's Club are requested to attend the
funeral services of the late Sam H.
Maddock at Grace Episcopal church,
Franklin avenue, on Friday, April It,
at 5 p. m. In token of sympathy and
respect for the sorrowing and bereaved
widow, Mrs. Frances E. Maddock.
MRS. W. V. BARNES,
Vice President.
before, but was released two years ago
as cured.
The bar dredger Chinook has beei
overhauled and repaired at San Fran
cisco and has been ordered to the
Columbia river. She will probably
anchor abreast of Flavel until such
time as she will be ordered to proceed
to work on the bar again. It Is hoped
that arrangements can be made to have
work commenced this summer.
OLD FOLKS
THEIR DAYS MAY BE PROLONGED
How the Evening of Life May Be Made
Happier for All.
A. F. & A. M. Funeral Notice.
The members of Temple lodge, No. 1.
and all sojourning Master Masons,
are requested to assemble at the lodge
room. Masonic hall, this (Friday)
morning at 9:30, to attend the funeral
of our late brother. David Morgan. By
order of the W. M.
E. C. HOLDEN. Secretary.
Elks' Funeral Notice
All members of Elks lodge are re
quested to assemble, at Elks hall at 4
p. m., on Friday, April 14, for the pur
pose, of attending the funeral of our
late brother, Samuel H. Maddock.
MALCOLM BARGER,
Exalted Ruler.
By order J. C, CLINTON, Secretary.
Frightful Suffering Relieved.
Suffering frightfully from the vlru
lent poisons of undigested food, C G.
Grayson, of Lula, Miss, took Dr. King's
New Life Pills, "with the result," he
writes, "that I was cured." All stomach
and bowel disorders give way to their
tonic- laxative properties. 25c at Chas.
Rogers' drug store, guaranteed
"If people only knew th good that
IVnol does old people," said Mr. Cliu.
llogeis our well known druggist, col
umns of space in our newspapers
would be devoted to the subject for the
benefit of mankind In general. I can
truly say that we have never sold any
thing in our store equal to Vlnol for
old people.
,'You see, with old age comes feeble
ness and loss of power, the organs act
more slowly and less effectually than
n youth, the appetite is poor, the di
gestion Is weak, and there Is not that
uaine renewal of bodily tissue.
"There is nothing mjnre pitiful to
me than to see old people tottering
bring back lost years, but it will
lengthen life and brighten the years
that remain.
We arc hearing from all over the
country remarkable results which
prove my statement, and we have re
celved letters from ams and daugh
ters of old people telling hw father
or mother has been mnde well and
happy by the vigor and strength which
Vlnol Brings the old.
"It was only a few days ago a let
ter was brought to my attention from
Mr. John G. Nlchals of Lawrence
Mass., In which he said that he was
eighty-four years old, and he had not
felt jo well for 15 years as he had
since taking Vlnol; It gave him o
good appetite, and he feels strong and
well, and Is working every d;iy from 6
o'clock In the morning until Ave
o'clock atnlght."
"It Is Just this way," continued Mr.
Rogers, "Vlnol Invigorates the stom
ach first of all, creates an appetltr
and enables the stomach to separate
from foo the element needed for
rich, red blood, healthy body materia)
and sound, steady nerves. In this na.
tural manner It repairs worn tlsues,
checks the nautral dacline and re
places weakkness with strength.
"For any one suffering from 'any
weakntTP1, run-down condition Vlnol
will do the same; and It If because we
know so well what Vlnol will do that
we guarantee Its action, and we will
gladly refund the money paid for It
to any one who, is not satisfied. 1
wish every old persen In this vicinity
would Just try Vlnol on our guarantee.
If it does not satisfy) then It will not
cost them a cent. Chas Rogers, druggist
WE JU
: M
C- iff rA
i , L,fc jj
TWA
TELL
N
TTO
YOU
Copy right by
Hart Schaffrifr fif Marx
. . THAT OUR
Spring Suits, '
Top Coats and
Rain Coats
have arrived and we can
"rdoubtedly show you the
swellcst line in Astoria at
from
$10.00
to
$30.00
IN OUR
Furnishing
Goods
Department
you will find everything
that is
New Neat and
Nobby.
HATS
New shapes and colors
$1.00 to $5.00
Everything guaranteed to give entire
satisfaction or money refunded.
P. A. STORES
THE DRESSY SHOP FOR DRESSY MEN.
THERE IS A
REASON
For the popularity of our Millinery
department. Situated as It Is, on
the second floor of our building In
a cozy, comfortable room, In charge
of an expert, until recently with one
of the leading millinery establish
nents In the country; this depart
ment Is the Mecca of all lover of
stylish mlltlonery. Visit our store
aid see the elegant display at Dee
Hive prices.
For a Pretty Walking or
Traveling Suit
There Is nothing daintier than an
Aipacca or Hllk Shirt Waist Suit,
chosen from the complete line of
new patterns. Just received by us.
ALPACCA SUITS made of good
quality Aipacca, In several colors
And grades, more or less daintily
finished, from $5 to SU
8HIRT WAIST SUITS made of a
ood quality changeable silk. Sev
eral colors to choose from $12
SHIRT WAIST SUITS of eicellent
quality figured silk, pattern being
a broken stripe, dainty design, In
blue, brown, green and gray.. $14
SAME 8TYLE 8UIT8 of a better
grade of material $18
8HIRT WAIST 8UITS, mude of
fine, heavy quality changeable
silk In various colors, well fin
Ished $22
No trouble to show goods.
BEE HIVE
M. 8. COPELANO & CO.
First! National Bank of Astoria
ESTABLISHED 1886
Capital and.Surplus SIOO.QOO
PATTON'S
SUN PROOF PAINT
Lasts Longerand Looks Better.
Guaranteed Tor; 5ears.
For sale by (
B. P. ALLEN (Si SON
ASTOR A GROCERY
62? Commercial St
Phone Main 681
Our announcements , to the grocery
buying public will appear In dlspln)
advertisements hereafter. We have
adopted this style, believing that we
can say more and more frequently to
our customers. New text, showing
special Items will appear every Thurs
day and Sunday. You will find thee
items of money-saving ister.it to you
We want your trade. If quality and
prices are an object we will get It. A
trial will convince you. Prompt dellv
ery.
The
Palace
Cafe.
ThelBest Restaurant.
Regulaf' Mealst,25c
Everything the Market Affords.
Sunday Dinners a Specialty.
Palace C tering Co.
Are your spirits drooping 7 Do you
feel that tired feeling? Does your ap
petite need coaxing? Then your blood
la poor. That la naturea way of tell
ing you that you need our
ALTI-TONE
It la an Ideal tonic, bracing, strength'
enlng and exhllnratlhg. It purlflea the
blood, tones up the system' and will
make you feel Ilk. yourself again In a
week or to,
FRANK HART, Dro&ist.
SOLE AGENT
Corner 14th and Commercial St.
WOOD! WOOD! WOO
Cord wood, mill wood, box wood, any
kind of wood at lowest privet. Kelly,
th. trantf.1 man. 'Phon. 2211 Blaek,
Barn on Twelfth, opposite opera
house.
ASTORIA IRON WORKS
JOHN POX. Pres. nnd SupU
r.L. W8H01Hcremry
A. roX, Vlr President,
AW10K1A HAVlNilM bANK, Truss
vf Designers and Manufacturers of v y
V THR UTKBT IMPROVED
. CANNING MACHINERY, MARINE ENGINES AND Boil ERS
v COMPLETE CANNERY OUTFITS FURNISHED.
CORRESPONDENCE SOLICITED.
Foot of Fourth Street, . . ... A8T0KIA, OREGON,