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THE COOS BAY TIMES, MARSHFIELD, OREGON, THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 3, 1916 EVENING EDITION.
THREE
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Of
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i i
U
Inter-Ocean Transportation Co.
S. S. Nairn Smith
I'nhScntforH nnd I''olght
,lltrtlNMMCAXi'isco Wednesday, feii. fl-AT SER-
SAILS 10 ,,"',5 ok TinK-qoiii HmHli 'JVimlnnl Dock.
S. S. Adeline Smith
Passenger Only ,
,., RlV FRANCISCO MAY EVERY FIVI) DAYS F
SAH-S 10" B.M1TII MILL DOCK
C. F. McGeorge, Passenger
rreigni caal
Phono ii:
ROM
and
Smith Terminal Dock
BmmumiHmn0mfvimam7mjt
THE ANIMATOR
Founded and Confounded Tel). 2,
1010.
Enter
safe. Our readers tiro free to put tilled with loved ones, a few good
whatever their thirst dlctntos hu books nnd soino truo lrienas.
the blank spaces resorved for this
pernicious publicity. Tho money's
on tho bar, boys, just think up
The Associated Press seems to
havo had much moro luck with
its national grlppo propaganda
v n Strictly Flrst-Class Mat-,"hat you want and keep thinking.! hnn dd tho UnUed prc8g ,n act
SW0,,f M:c,"ft(,0 ling as publicity agent for potromor
Ouivrded Sonet
Honesty, not bluffing, pays.
Advertising used to be 80 per
cent bluff.
Today it is 80 per cent hon
estand is getting nearer 100
per cent honest ever day.
1). C. Forbes In Mow York American
High Quality Groceries
Our own prompt and particular delivery service Ef
ficient clerks-being out of the high rent district and
keeping our prices as low as consistent with good busi
ness makes
Conner & Hoagland
The Leading Grocers Dealers in Good Groceries
797 South Broadway. Phones 348-J and 326
(Contlnucdfrom Pago 2)
Tonus or subscription Com
nuttilcato with tho secretary and
offer him 10 cents apiece for ex
tra copies. If ho doos not take you
up, offer him moro. '
Advertising rates Advertising
rates will bo mado known to adver
tisers after tho Isstio of tlio paper.
Then -wo know how much money
wo owo and can adjust our charges
to suit. Advertisers In this Isstio
will bo advised, with asllttlo do
lay as posslblo how much It will
cost thorn. Hates aro based abso
lutely on our needs and what wo
think you can pay. Advertisers
refusing to pay for their ads will
bo taken coro of by our Mafia and
Hlaek Hand department. A word
to tho wlso should bo sufficient.
There aro many horrible examples
among you.
This paper wishes to nsstiro its ( tls. Of course, you must havo an
rcadors that If tho Ford Peace i automobile to bo cllglblo for tho
Party bad gono to Europo In our
day wo would not havo falion
down on. tho story as did the
Times hnd tho Record. Wb would
havo Isont Rubs Tower along to
cable It to us by rounds from tho
ringside
EXPERT WELDING of METALS
Steel, brass, cast, iron and aluminum castings made
like new
DEMONSTRATIONS DAILY. .
Koontz Garage
Phone 180-J. North Front Street
PARCEL POST YOUR LAUNDRY
We Pay Return Charges. Prompt and Efficient Service
COOS BAY STEAM LAUNDRY
This paper absolutely
refuses to accept advertise-
incuts of alcoholic hover
ages of nny kind, Including
hard elder. Wo aro backed
up In t'Ms mutter by tho
H'nto of Oregon nnd assure
you that If Iho Slato will
4 back up wo will bo glad to,
get tho buslncM.
latter while any body can get tho
grlppo.
If you think you want to bor
row soino money call on Ralph
WtllinniB and be convinced that
you don't.
A follow showed us a letter from
Art Peck with dictation marks on
It and when Art docs this its n
sign ho thinks ho's misspelled a
word.
do udl "fill In 'blank until .follow1'
lng a regular natural demise Prodi If you see anything funny on tho
Wilson has bid our editorial re- right hand sldo of tho Record cdl-
. This import qlnlins, to give more
real Interesting news than any
othor medium In the world, seam
stresses and some members of tho
Club excepted. Please
POINTED PERSONALS
mains godspeed to the crematory.
Tho succoss of this paper was
assured when wo heard tho. llno
typcr stop and read some of tho
very oxcollont things to his fel
low-worker,
1
j
I
We don't want to say nothtn
neliove us, when you i about a rival but tho Cent. Ato.
make tho "back room" lauKii at (sounds Spanish, don't It?) Booster
your stuff when you'ro not lookln' goes an nwful '.'clip" every Friday.
you'ro good. Wo did, tako it from
iih. Outsldn of that wo don't think i A
much of ourselves.
OFFICIAL
Tho letter writing wook recently
hold In Oregon was such a suc
ccs8 that tho Publicity Commlttco
of tho Chambor of Commerce will
, havo ono in Coos County boforo
i long. Portland asked all tho
stato to write tholr friends to
como to Portland. Wo shall ask
Portland to write Its frlonds to
HUGO QUIST has Earl Powoll look
ing for a fellow who tried to beat
him out of n board bill.
HARRY NASDURG and Ray 0111
vant say that a puro food label
won't keep you from gotting tho
can.
CONTRACTOR PERHAM says It la
hard to bid for n Job with war
prices fluctuatln' llko an Adam's
apple.
MAIR DANO reports a man wno
brought In a half dollar minted In
1849, but ho won't toll who tho
tltowad Is.
CARL ALBRECIIT is arranging to
havo tho logging truck drlvo over
South Droadway next week to test
tho now paving.
ALHERT MATSON thinks a man who
don't belong to tho Chamber of
Commorco wouldn't ovon look
pleasant in a photograph shop.
CARL EVERTSEN wishes us to an
nounce that ho docs not belong to
tho Gorman club. He says ho would
not oven do It If thoy wore a hy
phen. DOC. TOYE Bays that tho lnfrcqucn
cy of tho weather this season
would havo made It hard to get a
crowd to tho band concerts anyhow.
woman usod Harry Wlnklor'B i LIFTMAN LANDO of tho Coko
torlal pago soon It will bo ours bo
causo thoy havo asked permission to
j go through tho wasto basket In tho
Animator sanctum,
drod dollars In farm of family
containing attractive young lady If
farm la located on Jitney line.Ad
drcss Dob Dlllard.
HELP wanted female
WANTED Mnld with face to stop
clock to wait on family of two.
Phono G4-J.
WANTED Men to luuidlo lumber,
best of board guaranteed. Arno
Moreen.
WANTED Young Indies with
granulated eyelids In sugar de
partment. Warnor Grocery Co.
M ANTED Young ladies to study
phonetics and becomo tolephono
operators. Apply Gdoso and Furry
Telophono Company.
phono for twenty minutes tho othor
day nnd bought a dlmo's worth of
btnmps to show bar appreciation.
SITUATION WANTED Butler with
34 years oxporlenco, Including ear
ly training with English family.
Harry Dutlor, Coko Bldg.
SITUATION WANTEIK Will dovoto
part Mmo to struggling churches
without parsons. Wrlto F. M. Parr
sons, Dusy Comer Drug Store,
SITUATION WANTKD Measuring
potatoes or other fruit in bulk.
Farm preferred, phono C. R. Peck.
TICIAL PAPER OK COOS o c -,.. tll0y ,,0.t
COUNTY. OFFICIAL PAPER wftt to gct nny ,n.wroiluor.. Wltn
OF MARSHFIELD l ,t, ,m ,,.. nnin nrrnua Willi
us they will suro como across with
tho correspondence
Tho abovo titles glvo us the priv
ilege of lambasting tho County.
Court nnd Mayor Copplo but Just
to show our Independence wo will
not say a word nbout them. Why!
should wo? Thoy never bought us
n drink. Now they never can.)
What will wo do, what will thoy,
fin? A vnnr'a allliarrllillnll will lin
given to tho first Individual who Kenernlly get their wish. Ono can
will show tho officials mentioned
above a way to get right with us.
ON FRIENDSHIP
Friends, good friends, those who
aro earnestly and honostly Inter
ested In our happiness, welfare and
success aro moro to bo desired than
riches by somo pcoplo nnd thoy
Tho Business Manager contract
ed somo spaco to tidvortlsers sell
ing goods designed to stagger hu-
liinnltv tml TUnlrlol AMnrnnv T.ll.l
not hopo to havo his personality
moot tho upprovnl of ovory ono.
As Aftor Rubs O'Brien so truly
says: "No man's heartstrings aro
attuned to tho heart throbs of nil
thoso with whom ho comes in con
tact
"BALLAD OF THE BOOSTERS"
BOOST A BIT!
Here, you discontented knocker!
Growlln' 'bout tho country's Ills,
Chloroform yor dismal talkor,
Tako a euro o liver pills.
Stop your durn kl-o-teo howlln'
Chaw sand nnd git somo, grit,
Don't sit In tho dumps a-growlln,!
Jump tho roost
An' boost
A bit!
Fall In whllo tho band's a playiu',
Ketch tho stop nnd march along;
'Stead o' pessimistic brayln',
.lino tho halloluyor song!
Drop yor hammer do somo
rootln'
Grab a horn, you cubs, an' split
Every echo with your tootlu'!
Jump tho. roost
An' boost
A bit!
zsp
Jcqvlst nnnouueos that If wo print as a young pup. Wo can almost
thorn ho will flno us. Whllo wo, hear our talcs w,ng. Wo havo nt
bollovo ho'd havo to find us boforo' tempted In a friendly way to mako
ho fined us, still wo will play 'you snlllo nnd nblo to onduro tho
romarks of tho various speakers
who will try to ontortaln you JuBt
rcmombor that at any time' you bo
como bored you may qulotly read
this papor. Do not uso It to mnko
I wads to throw at tho toast master.
But, to got back and closo with
tho beautifully rounded nlco words
J of tho follow whoso .stuff wo start
ed to steal:
"For, nftor all, what moro should
bo desired In this world than a
modest Incomo, a cheerful homo,
VAX MAY ACT
Charles Van Duyn, who haa
worked 14 hours looking pleasant
This pngo is Just ns friendly, at peovlBh drummers ovory day for
-iB
Keeping The
Dollar Home
Every Dollar sent out of town for a pur
chase enriches some one else
Every Dollar spent here helps to enrich
this city
All things being equal, our merchants
are entitled to your first consideration
This prosperity is your prosperity As
they grow they become greater fac
tors in our city life
In many instances you can buy at home
to better advantage than elsewhere
Look over the Advertising in today's
Coos Bay Times and see if that state
ment is not true
Compare goods and prices and ascertain whether
or not our local business men are "on the job.
six years except yesterday and to
day, hao tho following to say of
his futuro plans:
"I may do ono thing and I
may do anothor. Noxl to tho ho
tel business I know mot about
tho show business. I was never
In It hiit when I was In Oklihomo
I iiBcd to travol with ovory troupo
that left our hotol long enough to
attnch sufficient box pfflco money
to pay tholr bill. That was val
uable oxporlenco nnd has mado mo
n movlo fan. What over olso a
moving plcturo show can do It
rau't bring In a troupo to beat n
board bill."
I
mN
Eel
ln I iwfr jW w
-Mll in lll""" '"
building says that when City
Attorney Jim Brnnd gets mar
ried Hugh Barclay will bo tho
only ono left ho won't havo to
keep tab on.
HORSEY KRE1TZER says that' for
every schemo to "mako pcoplo
savo that wouldn't otherwise
suvo" thoro aro threo or four
, ways of prying tho mazuma off
a tightwad.
PROF. JERRY HUNT, gives his
birth-place as tho "high seas"
when ho registers. He Is right
sorry ho Isn't a soprano so tho
"High C's" would bo of somo
uso to him.
JAKE HILLSTROM promises to
really mako a roputatlon for his
now storo In strawberry season.
Ho will havo boxes so big thnt
thoy will hold tho largest straw
borry without bruising It.
SHERIFF JOHNSON wishes ho could
bo as arbltary as his brother of
ficer In Curry county who mado
a prisoner sloop out on tho Jail
' steps 'bocaiiBo ho didn't como back
from n flshln' trip In tinio to bo
locked up nt olght o'clock.
JOHN KENDALL'S sunny disposi
tion, was clouded for a day last
week when . his shirt had not
had Its Ingrowing neck hand
Ironed out. John says nothing
makes a lswycr maddor than to
try and ehut off his wind.
Sl'PT. W. F. MILLER says tho
folks who have boon kicking
about his trains going slow thoso
twenty years will bo sorry whon
thoy didn't tako tholr opportu
nity to look at tho scenery moro
when tho trains run to Coqulllo
In 24 mluutos.
DOC DIX always sharpens his
knives beforo ho goes Into tho
oporatng room but ho gets
peovod whon ho wants hurry
up sliavo and Jess Torroll has
to stop and sharpon his razor.
Joss will glvo Doo an nnaosthot
Ic It ho kicks any moro.
RALPH LARAWAY dollghtfully
entertained Ralph Laraway at
tho recent nppearanco of Thoda
Bora at tho Noblo. Tho party
was such a success that Mr.
Laraway will entertain his guest
on tho next appcaranco of Miss
Bara.
SITUATION WANTED -Will gum-an-too
to turn any machinery or mot-
ala of all kinds into Junk. W. J.
Rust.
INSTRUCTION
WHY BE SELF CONSCIOUS? I'm
not. Others can loam my meth
ods In 3 minutes. Recently ro
ylncd nnd mado adaptablo to dry
territory. Dr. Straw.
SEE ME AND got hep to tho stuff
that will cnablo you to make a.
nolso llko Caruso or Paderowsky.
VIctrola or pianola. L. L.
Thomas.
REAL ESTATE
PREFERRED PERIIAM PARK
Booklet on request. Just Reid
about it. ,
FOR SALE Stuckup Iiomso with
ancient Inconviononccs. Wilson
Kaufman, Agt. You ought to boo
mo whon my faco gets back in
shapo.
BUSINESS CHANCES
INTEREST IN DOLL factory will be
sold to right party applying early.
Sco Qcorgo or Alva Doll.
T-
WE HAVE VALUABLE wtr supply
for uso as chasers. Would llko iu
correspond with nny parties know
ing of anything to chaso this year.
Hank and Clem Wells.
FOR SALE
FOR SALE Two hcU of uncalled
for tailor mado tooth. Can alter
any mouth to fit them. Dr. H. E.
Kolty.
FOR SALE Brand now 1010 Ford
car, Just overhauled. Smith &
Wade.
LOST
LOST Black bag containing dress
suit, flask and largo roll of bills
(from creditors.) Finder keep bfg,
suit and bills. Jack Mereen, Phono
118.
JOSHIFIED ADS
HELP! HELP!
Mon and women wanted for
U. S. Government Jobs; (300 to
$500 nor month to commonco.
Long vacations. Llttlo work Wrlto
Immediately for list of positions op
'en. Coos county should have at least
! 1200 of theso Jobs. Mark letters
personal. Congressman W. O.
Hnwley, Washington, D. C.
FOR SALE Circus paraphernalia.
Account of closing tho circus of
which I havo actod as ring master
for somo years on Docomber 31.
1015, I will soil all fixtures cheap.
Many of tho animals which I train
ed dully have tholr tonguos hang
ing out by this time but thoy could
bo brought under control by n tour
to California, Pink spiders and
othor interesting membors of my
late monagerlo. Can only bo im
ported in limited quantities. See
me at onco. II. McKeown.
GROW PAWPAWS
Here's a Good Salesman
People passing cannot help but see your show win
dowsmake them so attractive that they will stop. No
clerk, however efficient, can work as does a well-illuminated
window. It sees everybody on the streetsit
makes sales at a lower cost and never tires of working.
Electric Light
will help you display your goods so as to do this. The
latest Mazda C type of lamp is even more efficient than
anything heretofore offered. It will allow yon to illum
inate your windows brighter than ever before at no
greater cost. We will be very glad to advise you regard
ing any kind of illumination. This service is offered
without obligation.
Oregon Power Co.
WANTED Dressmaker to keep
my wife standing all day and
stick pins Into hor. Inquire of
tho editor.
ermlcclll,
Spaghetti,
Clilantl
Macaroni
TOO LATE TO JOSIIIFY
WANTED Man to trMvel for stn
tlonary house. Warner Ogren.
WANTED Typewriter, latest model,
Coos county Lax Association, Coko
Building.
HELP WANTED MALE
WANTED Every render Is wanted
to assist in getting members for
the Marahfleld Chamber of Com
merce. All mon with 60c a month
eligible.
! WANTED Shock headed youth, live
wire to learn electrical wiring, See
Langworthy.
SITUATION WANTED Ah atten
dant in nlco, quiet Insane asylum
preferred. Salary loss object than
desire to Improve surroundings. F.
A. Tledgen,
SITUATION WANTED
SITUATION WANTED Young iiimii
of good habits will Invest few hun-
COME TO FIRST ADDITION AND
REDUCE YOUR COST OF LIVING
Every Man His Own Gardener
Testimonials:
Bob Graves writes; Starting with
35 cents worth of spoghottl spawn,
I raised enough to feed and clothe
my family and build an addition to
the house, I am now so affluent that
I havo rofused to take two divorce
cases without feeling that I am tak
ing food out of tho mouth of my pet
dog.
C. M, Connor wroto a fine testi
monial but recalled it for fear it
would hurt tho grocery business
more than a public market.
E. C. Drews; Please do not pub
lish tho great success I have made
raising marshmallows on the re
claimed tide lands. Please attempt
to buy back the Wlrolesa Site for
mo as I can make more setting it to
marshmallows than can Uncle Sam
using It to raise currents.
Jitney, Water, Telephone and Elec
tric Service
REYNOLDS UEVKLOPMKNT CO,
:-: Alaska Yukon Myers, Manager :-:
"Wo havo lots more lots whon tunM
lots avo gone,"
' ""wm
: