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About The Madras pioneer. (Madras, Crook County, Or.) 1904-current | View Entire Issue (Aug. 6, 1908)
5BTBIin.BMITII,Boom M fiSSK i- bwt frIoHd"f ifliSi Kxpom.ro mid ;firf, wlDimy oiwo robust Sirrtol ffootion. of ;tbbr0 to my recovery. f'douLt,oSoHt oll doctor ndvlsot IotM WJ ranldly, 'roc,,,ftl ' (r y .eulthwa- fully ro i month my ni ft cwtoful man's thanks for ; "AcrtP hod to porfoot health." Wtm Z for His Patients. iiolnK J. ,, l0 my uatlonU In 'yffl i nl- H bo :,,1Ct ln roureprot.nt. l'ormm oun 1,1,1 At the timo I began Uflluu it, it 1 (ion. 1 ; f(, unknown." rilirtnllo l'''lK",'' , 1 1. than I look," wltl tho maf ' "fti.Vil...." circle md -JK limn forty winter, have 'Srilvl Ion,: In tl.li MtSK" Wrrrd the elderly i 'Tre comotlmPH seen a many ; winter hew " " ,r1'' rfronii Au VjmllH. Haven't Heard of you going out to. i.M.nb'1 to dinner lately." .t b! i do l,,Bt nny B?hr, I though you wore hla closest Mini What's the matter?" ' 'lie tells mo their coolc doesn't HUo ' w-phlladellihln Vrcm- . Utile Mm. Hunter hart heard m ,nr Jokes about tho brides who M Mrtft successfully that she j. op lier mind that the first re- he made f tlic u",rkut ndd moiv her to bo n sophisticated taxirife. "Scw In(( Vloauo," she itld,"tffo French chops and one bun Mtrcen peas."--Judge. surer wrni. "0m objfftion to your poem." dab! tht ritor, jlancins througti the manuscript, ii thit Wb.ltier once wrote a ioeui em WjIdj luUtaoiially the name Idea," Da jon mean to nay, r," thundered ibt fit-foot taller, "that I " But ju bare Improved on there, my for lir," hafilr Interpoied the editor; jwUrt Improved on them Immensely," Can Such Tlilnir Ilef 0, Johnny, Johnny!" pitched Sir , Upilltj. "You're w awfully Iwd oo ilw. Thl in the ond pnlr I've bought iw lisce wt bad that eoulnuptlal utonr , h ifarch I I'rrntimtif Ion. rbJaty I auppofi you thlnlc that If you hil lit regulating of the universe you ccdl rcaV some Improvement on the pwat Job, don t you? Kai I don't know about that, but I I could dUKscit one elm nee. I JM like to have tbiuga o arranged tht trn a man la having a good time lit dirt would teem to mm alow!y In- mi of quickly. I'm about to take a nalloo." Orounillma Pr-nr. "I did think," Bald Cholly Snobberly, cf tomt In for poiltlcfl, but I wiia ifrtkl I wouldn't know Just how to treat my Inferior, don't y' know." lour inferiors?" remnrked 81mrpa "Oi, you wouldn't Im! likely to meet urof Uicm." -Philadelphia I'roaa. . Crn.ht ato leaped from the bleb, tp bank. ' haven't you heard the pnneful itory? i TTitplrt of elans are flylnj yet.) , I' hotied on a conaervutory 1 "vkta Tribune. No Hrcoiirnn. "Jotaalc. I tlilnk i xmt tiicf iD it dark clonet beneath tho ntalr." I don't doubt It; I Imvo known it n there for some tlrno." felepbone for tho pollcol" St's tllO use? You rn'f u meter."-lloustoti Post. arrest ,n, , "nnurr. "liatOVPr mi .1.. iij. . . ' """i wrom mo Wt lover, "don't ahow my Icttern to N to any one," J'1",110 tor. denrcHt," enmo the. , w. in j,igt an much nBlmmcd of ."uujyou flrCiH H with that, tho PiwRoiiicnt bo- K A tilttA. - la. Qtxtr8enna ntlw bowels, cleanses system effectual),, onoinovorcom'mj "Wnol constipation Wic!n 1 1 v ci3.uuy' HacturcdbtU mm Tllto BEST OTT LIED. riot .tlll llfo'H hent la cooled, Tho headlong ruli idowoti to a qult twice, And evory purblind pnaston that Ima ruled Our holaler yenrif, nt lnt fipurH tie In vain, nnd weary of tho race, Wo chro no more who Iowa or who whin Ah) not till nil thereat of life m-ema paat Tho bent of llfo bcKina. To toll for only fame, IlnndelnppliiK nnd tho fickle iruata of prnlae, For plnco or power or cold to gild n nome 'Ahovo tho (trnvu whereto All path will bring ua, were to loao our dnya, We, on whoao earn youth's pnaalnR boll has tolled, In blowing bubbles, even as children do, ForBottlnjt wo Brow old. Hut tho world wldons when Buc)i hope of trivial train that ruled u lies Hrokcn nmoiiK our childhood's toys, for (hen We win to sclf-conlrol I And mall ourselves In manhood, nnd there rise Upon us from tho vast and windless t holjjht ' Choso olonrer Uiouhts that aro unto the soul What stars aro to tho night. Spectator. fH H:- T , V.. D J x ua i(Uiiy w ay ivouna "Wlitit'H tho nmttur with you?" I'lill Ippu iiHked suspiciously. Ilor iHMiHlu lnul ttrcotwl lior with n sort of centime remoteness tlnit culled for (ixpliuiiitlon. At her (iticstlou he ninde nn ostenta tious effort to return to earth. "I'ldl," he mild (irennilly, "I'm koIiij; to set married." If ho hud hoped to surprise her, the hope w.-ih futile. A touch or alertness, InttrnyltiK Itself In his eyes, put her on her K'titml. ".My dear Ituiwrtl" Hho cried content edly. "ItonllyJ How excltliiKl Do toll 'lie who she Is!" lie slKhed rnthur dlsuppolutcdb'. "1 don't know," ho said. "I'm Just co:i ultlerlnj;." lMiIllppn'H eyebrows rose slightly as she glanced at tho sheets of paper sur roundlnj; lilm. "In typewriting?" she Inquired. "Oh, no; I see. You're draw lug up the proposal." Jibe shuddered Indignantly. "Cer tulnly not! Mow could I when I don't know yet who It's to be?" "One can leave a spuce," murmured I'hlllppu, "and 111! In the name after wards, you know." lie looked at hor with dignified re proach. "These are not proposals." lie informed her. "They ure their charac ters." I'hlllppa stared. "Theirs? Whose?" "The girls to whom It would be pos sible for me to projosc." "Oh I" breathed I'hlllppa, and hung over tho tnblo with Interest. "What do you mean?" "Grnpliolofry," he suld. "Von see, I feel n lilt nervous alout choosing " "Choosing?" rippled I'hlllppa. "Oh, well." ho sulked, "of course I know she may refuse mo. hut I've got to decide which to ask, anyway, haven't I?" "Oh of course," ngrewl I'hlllppa. 'And you could maku certain, couldn't you, by keeping a second In reserve? You know the sort of thing drapers put on their patturns. 'In making a eholco wu respectfully beg customers to select two or three designs, to uvold dlsapp ' " "Oh. If you find It so funny," he said disgustedly, ami swept the papers Into I heap. "I was trying to help," said she with indignation. ilo was with dlllleulty Induce! to pro ceed. "Well, 1 sent my handwriting to a graphologist, and and some girls' etturs " "How mean!" Hashed I'hlllppa. 'Tortious of letters," he corrected with dignity. "And yesterday I got those from the inijn." Ho Indicated the typewritten sheets. I'hlllppa sparkled. "You'll let me see them 7" she entreated, and ran her lin gers through the pages. "How miuiy? L-"lve7 Oh. but that one's yours. Well, four girls ought to ho plenty. ' U't's seu Goraldlne Urst '.Somewhat tickle In your attachments "' "You vylU admit," h Interrupted cold ly, "that Oornldlne Is out of tho ques tion." I'hlllppu laid hers on the table, not .vlthout hesitation. "The other may he worse." she mused. "Who's this? Oh. Horthn ITmvln. 'Of a somewhat cold and calculating nature.' Yes: she al ways lots me pay for everything when wo go out together. 'Not much love for children or animals '" I'hlllppa looked tip In some dismay. "Hut this is dreadrnH She she appears to he per foctly odious. Lot's see what he says about Olivia. 'Very ambitious; none but tho highest position would "' I'hlllppa unhesitatingly nbnndoned Olivia n depressing comment on tho numerical Btrungth of her cousin's wonkncBses. "Hut there's only MIbs Ilotterton left now," flho sahl anxiously. ".'Gift for' whnt's tho word? 'Nursing?' Oh, I'm sure that's not true." "And If it wero," Itupert demurred. "I don't want nlwnys to bo II), you know. And I've got to chooso ono." Thoy rouccted. "Well," Bold Philip pa nt lost, desporntcly, "you've paid your ponny, nnd you'd hotter " "It WftBn't a penny," he Interrupted 0U Tkodoraos?velf When President Iloosevelt retires from oHIco ho says ho will go to Africa to make his strenuous personnilty felt nmong tho big gnmo of that conti nent. Ho nnnounfes that It Is his ambition to secure with his own rifle a specimen of eacii species of Afrlcn's big fauna. This Is nn ambitious project and will be difficult to carry out. Famous hunters hnve gone to the small territory whero the oknpl browses In the swamps in the darkness nnd hides In dense thlckctg In tho hours of day light, hut very few have been so forttinato as to hag ono of these elusive animals. Is tho President sanguine that ho will bring homo tho skin of a white rhinoceros? The fact that ono was killed recently was thought worth tele graphing all over the world. Less than a centiirysngo tho white rhinoceros wns living In inrgo numbers from South Africa to the Sahara, but decades now elapso without one being killed. There Is not a specimen of whlto rhinoceros In many of tho largest mu seums. If Mr. Iloosevelt can bring his specimen homo alive it will be worth a small fortune to him. We have much to learn yet about many of tho Important animals of Afrlcn. Doubtless there are not n few of which wo have never heard. A sensation was caused In recent years by the discovery of the okapl, a beautiful animal with some of the physlcnl characteristics both of the horse and giraffe. When Itoyd Alexander crossed Nigeria and tho Sudan between tho Niger and the Nile, three years ago, ho discovered eighteen fpcclmens of mnmmalln that were new to science. Schillings, In the ovcrhuntcd regions of Hrltlsh and German Host Africa, has found several species unknown till he brought them to light. Thero will be more such discoveries. Mr. Iloosevelt proposes to hunt In the remarkable game country of the Hrltlsh Knst Afrlcn protectorate, from Mombassa to Ugnnda. In spite of the frightful slaughter in this region before tho gome laws went Into force, it is still one of the most wonderful fields of great jrame In tho world. gloomily. "He's a very exceptional graphologist and he charges five shill ings each." "Hut these four optional wives," ob jected I'hlllppu, "are all so hateful at least, when they're graphologized. 1 really think another five shillings would be n Justifiable outlay." She spoke a little absently; she was glancing through the typewritten character of ilupert himself and he wntched her with a hint of complacency. A subdued light in Iter eyes as she looked up troubled him. "I'm afraid there are a good many mistakes In It," he said modestly. I'hlllppa retlected. "Did you have to pay extra for yours?" she demanded. "What for?" he asked uneasily. "The whitewash," said I'hlllppa, with dancing eyes. He looked nt her with gentle re proach. "I thought yours perfect," he said. "Mine?" "Yes." He searched In his pocket book. "I wanted to know yours, but. "WHAT A WTY YOU Sl'ELL 80 BADLY." ,,feonrseTI didn't put It with the others, as you are not available." "Uu, dear, what a lot of trouble you took. Do you really think all those nice things of me?" "I Just wrote down what I thought of vou," he confessed. "Hut how on earth did you guess! typewriting tells no tales." Her llns ouivered. "You said I was sincere In my attachments, Uu." "So you are." "And that you wero attached to a country life." "So 1 am." She laughed suddenly. "Whnt a pity you spell so badly, llu!" lie was nuzzled. "All great men spoil badly." ho assured hor. "What's that got to do with It?" Sho leaned toward him. "I recognized your touch, Uu. Yon nlwnys did spell 'attach' with threo rs." i-onuon Sketch. Hl Month Pull, A certr.!n town council after n pro tracted sitting was desirous of nd-. Jouriilng for luncheon. Tho proposi tion was opposed by tho mayor, who thought that If his follow councilors felt tho stimulus of hunger tho dis patch of business would bo much fa cilitated. At last an Illiterate member got up nnd exclaimed,; "I ham astonished, I ham surprised, I ham amazed, Mr. Mnyor, that you will not let us. go to lunch !" "I'm surprised," oxclnlmed ono of his colleagues, "that a gentleninn who bus got so much 'ham' in bis mouth wants any lunch nt all !" Londou Scraps. Anger Is n compoBito picture of all tho buBor paBalons. WIRE FENCES FOB TELEPHONES. lined Iiy (be Slirnal Corim in Dlrecl lntf Jlllltur)- Maneuver. "In the West uud Southwest, wberb there are long stretches of unbroken wire fences, these wires are frequently used to convey telephone messages from one point to another," said Capt. John G. Sender, of San Antonio, Tex., here on business before' the departments, ac cording to tho Washington Post. "In some localities the fence wires are converted Into regular telephone lines, with permanent equipment for practical use. These lines are often from ten to thirty miles long, and are a great convenience to people of the ranches. "The United States signal corps L well trained in the use of wire fences for telephone purposes. In the mili tary meneuvers that take place In the ranch region the signal corps plays nn important part In directing the move ment of the troops by Improvised tele phones. "In some localities where the coun try is rough or heavily wooded It is im possible to convey the signals from one point to another by the usual methods of lings or other visual signals. It Is then tho telephone Is brought Into play. "Each detachment of , signal corps men Is equipped with a field telephono attachment It requires the work of but a minute or two to connect this at tachment with a fence wire and to get Into direct communication with head quarters. "The use of tho fence wire for tele phone communication obviates the ne cessity of constructing temporary field telephone linos by the signal corps. It sometimes happens that a little dllli culty Is encountered In using the wires on account of some poor connection or break, but It usually does not trke long to discover and remove the cause of the trouble. "On some of the big rnnches straight lines of wire fence fifty to seventy-five miles long are- frequently found. These afford excellent opportunity for mili tary field service. "As a matter of necessity all rnnch fences must bo kept In good repair. To do this fence riders nrc constantly employed. Mukluu It l'liiln. Henri wns paying his first visit to London and was already wishing him self homo In gay Pnree, for he knew not a word of English. He had been very unfortunate and bad lost all his luggage, a toothbrush. So ho deter mined to buy nnother. Hut how wns ho to mnko his needs understood? At last his neck turned, howvrei. and ho espied a chemist's shop with a notice outside, "Icl on Parle Francnls." ill ho went nnd told tho assistant In French what ho wnnted. But that as sistant knew no Innguage except Eng lish, nnd another who caino to help lilm was Just us far at sea. But tho proprietor was nn Intelligent man, and ho know nt onco from tho cut of the customer's clothes that he was speaking French. "Ixavo him to me," ho said, with a superior smile. Then, forming a megaphone with his hands, ho shouted In tho Frenchman's ear; "Our assistant who spenks French Is out nt lunch. You'll have to wnlt J" London Scraps. Killed the 1II1I. Belle Jack said I looked so sweet In my now gowu ho couldn't hedp kissing mo. Mnud Well, tho modlsto guarantceo tho dress would give you satisfaction. Tho innn who has n kind word for oyorybody is gcnernlly suspected. 0 having an ax to grind. Mott tho Dirt Fll nt Panama, Lieutenant-Colonel George Geothals, chnlrman nnd chief engineer of the Isthmian canal commission, told Presi dent Iloosevelt Into in January that boforo January 1, 1915, the ditch which Is to bisect tho rortebrao of tho Ameri can continent will be completed and thnt nil will bo in readiness for the first trip to make the little pleasure Journey from the Atlantic to the Pa cific, so writes Hoy Crandnll in the Technical World Magazine. ' Inasmuch as tho colonel is noted for conservatism and caution, It Is believed that he feels deep down in his own heart that at least a year will bo cut from that esti mate. Pie tor Hint. Human Pincushion What has be come of the glass eater? Sword Swallower Got a Job as base ball umpire for the Benson. Human Pincushion Queer Job for a glass eater, isn't it? Sword Swallower Not at all. When the blcacherltes start throwing bottles at him he'll Just smile and' swallow them. Cnn of the Trouble. The visiting parson was handing con vict No. 1313 consolation in small chunks. "You should not complain, my mis guided friend," he said. "It Is better to take things as you find them." "Youse is on de wrong track, parson," replied the prisoner. "It was practiclu dat theory dnt got me pinched." CITO BU Vltntf Danco ond nil Ncrvons D1h"mc fllo pcrmnnonUy cured tr nr. Kline's Unot Ketvo iiratorcr. Hend for J-11IIE 2trlal bottls and treatlac 1T. It. XL Kline, Ld.. 831 Arch UU, Phlla.,Pa. Omlinloni of IIIMorr. The war correspondents were compli menting Capt. Molly Pitcher on the con spicuous courage she had displayed at the battle of Monmouth. "It was nothing," ahe said. "I merely wanted to show that my other name Isn't Coddle." For, verily, true bravery, unlike senius, vauntcth not itself, is not puffed up. s Didn't L,lka (lit I'brnme. "Charlie, dear," said young Mrs. Tor kins, "did you say this tip on the races was a 'lead pipe?"' "Yes." "Well, I don't pretend to expert knowledge. But lead ijlpe somehow sug gests plumbers. And plumbers are al--vays expensive." Washington Star. Mothera will And Mrs. TVInslow's Bdothlnu Byrup the txat remedy to tiso ioi Iheir cliOdx'Jl during tho tee thine period. Mutual Iteluctnnce. "Here Is my scat, madam, but candor compels me to say that I think you are as well able ro stand as I am." "Politeness compels me to say Thank you, sir.'" Chicago Tribune, London theaters, music halls and con cert halls provide seatluz accommodation for 327,000 people. CASTORS A Tor Infants and Children. The Rind You llaye Always Bought Bears the Signature of Aa lie Understood It. It was Dicky's first day at Sunday school, and he was telling his mother about it "They sung the funniest banquet song I ever heard," he said. "What was it?" she asked. "'Hold the Port; Fried Ham Com Inc !' " State of Ohio, City of Toledo I Lucas Countv. t 85- Frank J. Phoney makes oath that he 13 senior Eartnor oi the firm 01 F. J. Cheney .t Co., doin itsinessinthoClty of Toledo, County andGUte aforesaid, nnd that said arm will pay tho sura of ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS for each and every caso of Catarrh that cannot bo cured by tl,n lien 1 1 f 11.111. r.,a..h Pnrn Fit A NIC J. CIIENEY. Sworn to bclnro mo and subscribed In my pres ence, this Gth day of December AD 1SSG. c,.ai 1 A. W. GLKAPON, l-1-) Notary Public. ITall's Catarrh Curo is taken Internally, and acts directly upon the blood and mucous sur faces of thesystem. He-id fortestlmonlals free, F. J. CHENEY & CO., Toledo, O. Sold br all druspists,75 Tako Hall's Family Tills for constipation. Too Monotonous. "Yos," said Slangey, "I tramped through Switzerland once." "Como off!" exclaimed Dowter, "You never did!" "Sure I did ; on the level." "That proves you're lying. It's simply impossible to tramp through Switzerland on the level." The Catho lic Standard and Times. Is It Your Own Hair? 3naniaM.au iiiik hp uw 11111 jf.awraj 1 Do you pin your hat to your own hair? Can't do it? Haven't enouch hair? It must be you do not know Ayer's Hair Vigor ! Here's an intro duction ! May the acquaint ance result in a heavy growth ofrich, thiols, glossyhair! And we know you'll never be gray. I think that Kjer't flair Vlitor It the moit wonderful halritruwer that wu erer made. I hart) uifil It for nome time and I can truth, f 11II7 T that I m ri etir ileaod with It. I cheerfully wmmtid It an i p1nnln nrepa- rallon. " aiieb v. ii;ui;k. wbjwuu, ji.k A IZi&a br J. O. Ay r no.. towll, Ui. A1U HIUIUWIUICI. M. 9 ciraiPAmif 1. V PILLS. L & I O CHEKRV PECTORAL. 3 HOWAltD I'.. BtrrtTO?;. Agaayer fl Chemlit, I-eudvilIC Colorado, ftpeeimei nrUcst Gold, Silver, 1. ad, (I ; Gold, Silver, Uofd, Kk; Zluoor Ccpir.Vl. Cvouldo t-is. Malilnsenveiopm and nill price list nt on application. Control and Ura plre work solid ted. i;fbrencel Carbonate K a Uoual Bank. WHEfl YOU COME TO PORTLAND AKItANGK TO STOP AT THE CORNELIUS PARK AND ALDER STS. A New and Modern European Hotel, catering particularly to State-people, A refined place for ladles visiting- the city, close to tho shopping tenter. Rates reasonable. Free Bus. N. K CLARKE, (late of Portland Hotel) Mgr. St. Helen's Hail, Portland, Or. Resident and Day School for Girls. Catalogue on Request "TIIE .SCnOOOL OF QUALITY" Better each year, and larger. We novi have two floors 65x100 feet Thorough work tells the story. It counts in the end, and we admittedly lead in this re spect Get our catalogue, penwork, etc, then judge for yourself as to quality. A. P. ARMSTRONG, LL.I5., Irincipal Tenth and Morrison - Portland, Oregon. P N U No. 31 oa TTTHEK rlttnfr to advertisers pleaso I f luenuiin tuia pp r. IVmiilteK oi Fume. "Doing the author of one of the 'best sellers' of the year hns Its drawbacks," says a woman writer of popular books. "Frequent requests for contributions of one's books to charity bazaars are a tax upon good nature nnd the pocket book. No matter how flattering such demands may be, they are decidedly expensive." She went on to say that should she gratify all the persons who wrote to her for copies of ier books, "because they could not afford to buy them," nnd respond to the constant calls to devote the children of her brain to charities, it would cost her from $400 to ?500 n year, Tlthout counting the time lost in wrapping, directing and stampLug. New Yortc Press. , Una Her Doubts. "I know there aro such things aa rah makers," sighed Mrs. Chugwater, looking, through the window at the dismal pros pect outside; "but I don't believe there ii really any such thins as a rain check. Or, if there Is, there's nobody that knows how to use It." A CUKE FOR oRHEUMjCTISM Rheumatism is caused by nn excess of uric acid in the blood, which, is carried through the circulation to all portions of the system. Every muscle, nerve, bone nnd joint absorbs the acrid, pain-producing; poison, causing" aches, inflammation, stiffness and other well known symptoms of the disease. Permanent relief from the pains nnd discomfort of Rheumatism cannot bo expected from the use of liniments, plasters, and other external treatment which does not reach the blood, where the cause is located, Such measures give temporary relief, but in order to cure Rheumatism the uric acid and inflammatory poison must be expelled' from the blood. S. S, S. cures Rheumatism because it is a perfect blood purifier. It goes down into the circulation, neutralizes the uric acid and drives it from the blood. S. S. S. expels the irritating, inflammatory matter which is causing the paiu, swell ing and other discomfort, enriches the weak, sour blood, and permanently cures Rheumatism. In all forms of Rheumatism, whether acute or chrome, S. S. S. will be found a safe, vegetable remedy, possessing the properties needed to cure, nnd nt the same time a medicine that'builda up the entire system by its fine tonic effects. Book ou Rheumatism and any medical advica free to all who write. THE SWIFT SPECIFIC CO., ATLANTA, GA WE WILL GIVE AWAY 1 000 Valuable Household nnd Fancy Articles FREE, in exchange for Carton Tops and Soap Wrappers from "20 Mule Team" Borax and "20 Mule Team" Borax Products. Send postcard for particulars and 40-Pago Illustrated Catalogue. Address PACIFIC COAST BORAX CO., Oakland, Cal, Local agsnU wanted. Writ for monay maklnj; plan.
