The Sunday Oregonian. (Portland, Ore.) 1881-current, August 21, 1910, SECTION SIX, Image 64

The Sunday Oregonian., August 21, 1910, SECTION SIX, Page 5, Image 64

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Newspaper Page TextTHE SUNDAY OltEGONlAN. PORTLAND, AUGUST 21. 1910. . -a . . i .a I ! II ' VI II ll JC3 1 s-l I0OT KING GEORGE THINKS. HIS'INCOKE OFjftOOaOOO AYEARI5N0TMfaENr FOR ttlS NEED5 . M""M"M'"'"M"S!gV:- ij n;"J." " -r I lit Una f P:-P 'f ?v - rtrf- 5 mivs v I I F fiu& -r. voUrA BT MARfTS WARIDALE. BrCKlNOH built at so famlll , TTCK1NG1IAM PAUACE Is to be re- it least, tba front portion ao familiar to the world. Tha ap propriation aakd for la li.OOO.OOO. but. mo far. only $750,000 haa been granted for this purpose by Parliament. . At preaent the royal residence of tha Brit ish Sovereigns looka like a railway hotel. A couple of Americans who had loat their way in London recently, stopped and aaked the red-coated sol- dler standing outside tha Palace aentry box. -What barracks la this?" Tha shabby exterior of Buckingham Palace haa been commented upon by moat of the diplomat of Europe. The White House at Washington la far more pala tial. The lata King Edward had. In fact, begun to beautify the exterior of tha Palace. Ha built aome splendid grates surrounding the outer court and also gave orders for a magnflcent memorial fountain to Queen Victoria. All theae Improvements, however, only eei-red to emphasize the hideous alter lor of tha Palace Itself. But now $750,000 la to be apent on tha exterior of tha Palace. Queen Mary la deeply Interested In this work and King George haa left the schema of decoration In her hands. Curloualy enough English Sovereigns hare very little to do wuh their own household. All sorts of eSlcera are appointed to look after these details, whl.b are car ried oat by the Ixrd Chamberlain, the Lord Steward, the First Commissioner vf Works and the Karl Marshal. Cnder ordinary rln-timetanrra the up keep of the Koyal Palaces In various parts of the country amounts to about 1430.000 a year, but the sum of ITJO.000 1 an extra grant for the special purl-use of Improving the appearance of liucklngharn Palace. The pren.Tt Queen la very averse to living In Bui klngham palace until It is made more cheerful ao far as the exter rlor la concerned. Lewis Harcourt. First Commission er of Works, who haa charge of the carrying out of the Quevns Instruc . tions. has reported the Interior of Buckingham Palace to require very little alteration. As a matter of fact, the Interior of Buckingham Palace la one of the must m:igntnrent buildings In the world. While It l.iu several ar chitectural defects, the decorations and entire furnishing are splendid and sumptuous. King Ed ard waa rather pleased than ntherwla at the gloomy exterior of Buckingham Palace. for two reasons: First. It presented a murked contrast to the gorgeous Interior, and secondly. In theoe diva of social questlonliurs. It sat tnd the public who mlKht be Inclined t. h captious as to the luxury of Klnss. Th man on the street, looking at the shabby exterior of the Palace which haa Ion actually needed a coat of paint turned away with a grunt of satisfaction that the King waa Irving the simple life within. The history of Buckingham rain re Is more or less romantic. The first mon arch to live there as George the Third, who spent a lot of money on the place In order to please Queen Charlotte. The Palace was then simply known aa Buck ingham House." It was a bl. red brick mansion more closely resembling a farm l ou5 than anythlns else. In fact, they called George the Third "Farmer (Jeorge." because he lived In this old building In order to pleese his Queers' however, he added a grand saloon to the PsUv-e and changed the name to "Queen's House." Paring his reign the place got Into a state of very tad repair, and when Oeorae the Fourth came to the throne O'leen's House was almost uninhabitable. t. corse the Fourth wanted to rebuild the The Adventures of Mary Zeal Chaperoned by Wireless By Helena Smith Dayton "I HOPE the waves get as high as a cat's back and that we have a nice storm. aatd Mary Zeal, aa she .threw overboard a collection of remedies for seasickness crowded upon her by aollcitoos friends. "Seasick ness Is merely tha result of eating all the eaady one finds In one's atateroom " "On. la lt asked Grandfather Zal with a auperior smile. "No one ever sent me any candy and I remember ILe time I crossed In the 0 a there wasn't but one man down to dinner that night when " -II never oocurs to people that the b:- new ships of today have no vibra tions, owing to the turblno engine.' Interrupted, Mary, who had a theory that mal-de-mer la aa eiplnded tb-o.-y- Turblne grand mothers:" exploded Grand lather Zeal "Walt until a grood eiiff sea comes along and you'll sir a llftarent tuna." -All I know positively la that so far I m so hungry I could eat a horned toad sandwich:" cried Mary. Xt na find our deck chairs." sug gested old Mr. Zeal. "1 couldn't keep quiet In one unless you put a paper weight on my head." protested Mary, "or unless 1 were screwed down like the chairs In the drawing-room." "In the Lounge." corrected her grandfather. "And remember that ev erybody who holds the palm of the hand out on board la a ateward or stewardess not waiters, or chamber maids, or" "I can speak golf, motor, bridge and several other languages." broke In Mary, "and I'm sura I'll take to this new tongue rapidly ." "Well, don't try to run tNe ship." waa Mr. Zeal's parting Instruction aa Mary started on another tour of inspection. "With your talent for mixing Into things. I'm nervous." iwa't worry." said Mary. "I wont Interfere with the management of the hip. The purser has me scared to death already. Do yon know. I've often wondered what the ambitious parents 9l uula EngUsh boys look forward to royal residence but he could not get the necessary appropriation from Parlia ment. So he fooled the public Into glvi Ing Elm the money by asking for an ap propriation for "repairs" only. He ln atructed Naah. the architect, to carry out the so-called Improvements in such a way that the public would never re alise what was going on. George the Fourth got for this purpose the hug sura of 12.500.000. A portion of these "repairs" consisted in a magnificent mar ble ball one of the finest in the world. He also constructed an Imposing marble arch, mcdeled on the same lines as the Arch of Constantino In Rome. This mar ble arch was subsequently removed by Queen Victoria to Oxford street and Edgware Road, where It now standa at the corner of Hyde Park. George the Fourth's elaborate acheme for decorating and repairing Buckingham Palace was in the midst of Its progress when the monarch died, and William tli Fourth refused to live there because he did not like the way the placo was "littered up" by his predecessor's build ing operations. When Queen Victoria came to the throne she bad the Palace put In thor ough order and spent considerable money oa the interior. The Prince Consort had bull: for her a special ballroom and beau tiful gardens were laid out. Most o: the children of Queen Victoria were born In Buckingham Palace, including the late King Edward, and a fine nurs ery baa always been a prominent feature of the place. This nursery will now be mui-h appreciated by the young children of King Georse. Owing to the fact that Buckingham Palaco waa the place of hta birth. King Edward had for it an actual af fection, and ho was loath to make al terations which might remove land marks of his childhood. Queen Alex andra also retains a strong affection for Buckingham Palace, with all Its faults, architectural and otherwise. The present relsnlng Queen, however, does not share Queen Alexandra's senti ments. As a matter of fact. It is said there has been considerable feeling Iw-tween Queen Mary and the Queen Mother over this matter. Since King Edward's death. Queen Alexandra has resided In Buckingham Palace while King George has remained at Marlborough llouxe, his official res idence as Prince of Wales. Queen Alex andra for a long time kept flying at Buckingham Palace the I loyal Stand ard, while another Royal Standard was displayed on Marlborough House by the King. This was a very unusual pro cedure, and finally, the King bad to Intimate to the-Quen Mother that he could not allow her to fly the Royal Standard at Buckingham Palace. In consequence of this little disagreement Queen Alexandra, so to speak, "hauled down the flag" and put up Instead a flag of her own. on which the coat of arms of Denmark was Intermingled with that of England. That flag will remain on Buckingham Palace so long ii the Queen Mother la In residence. When the present appropriation for improving Buckingham Palace haa been spent, the total amount of money laid out on this structure by the English nation will have amounted to the large sum of nearlv IS.00O.ooa since the reign of George IV. If the additional rrnl of i.ono.ow la obtained. Bueklng- I ham palace will have become one of the most costly structures in ine worm. The interior of the present palace has been decorated from time to time by some of the roost famous architects and artists In the world. There la a magnificent sculpture gallery contain ing some of the best work, while the plctnre gallery Is almost unrivalled of Its kind. It contains some of the most famous old masters' In the world. There Is also a library composed of many priceless books of the rarest kind. The late King was very iona of this library and frequently used It their growing op to be. Of course, at home the Presidential chair Is always a possibility for Little Willie but tn foreign countries Tra sure boys must all hope to grow up to be pursers of ships!" Which was the laat lengthy conversation wnlch took place between Uary and her grandfather during the voyajre, for In the next hour Mary met Miss Kitty Wlldalrs and from then on the Indefatigable Mis Zeal had her hnds full. ' I'm traveling alone." Kitty confided. "Isn't It awful? My ohaperon waa obliged to cancel ber passage at the see aasa wtfa als.srt clck-1ke regularity the esstrr win aeu-swtiT, at the zat Inojportom. zamewta. KlrB kt aare at last moment. Of course, mother and father will meet me at Liverpool." Til sea that you don't gret lonely." encouraged Mary. "lonely V" said Miss Wlldalrs, with a little giggle. -Graolona. no! Tha chaperon part U what I need, not the companionship!" -Then I'll chaperon you." Mary again volunteered. "Or grandfather will." "Tou could get around livelier." con sidered Kitty- 1 select you."' lieC -sr?f t. St 2M.jFrJ . -r rr-ferr- 1 J' -Tr- rKA?A 11 Kl f-KINGHIM PALtK IT WILL SOOST BE REBUILT AX APPROPRIATION OK $7S0,000 HAS JUST BEEN GRANTED TthB Kiw' TO IMPKOVK THE EXTERIOR. OF BUCKINGHAM PALACE THE ROYAL RESIDENCE IS A DINGY-LOOKING AFFAIR WHICH RESEMBLES A RAILWAY HOTEL. ' as a place to receive various deputa tions. George the Fourth sold this li brary to the nation for J500.000 caah, and then pretended he had made a present of it to his people. Adjoining the library waa King Ed ward'a business office, where he had a battery of 14 typewriters, which were constantly kept busy. It was a well known fact that the late King took special care to answer every letter ad dressed to him. He was the first mon arch In Europe to Introduce the type writer Into Royal correspondence and though at one time he was adversely criticized even by Queen Victoria for "machining hia letters." the employ ment of typewritten correspondence haa been adopted by most ruling sovereigns. "If yon are so conventional. I'm sure grandfather would look more official Is tbe role!" "Seriously. Mies ZeaL will you keep me from making a goose of myself?" pleaded Kitty. "I'm old enough to have a few grains of sense-and I do have on land but the romantlo atmosphere of the sea Is always too much for me. Every time I cross I get engaged to somebody! This Is my ninth voyage and I know what I'm np against. You get acquainted with people better on a ship' In 10 minutes than you would on land In 10 years." "Why do you worry, since you seem to have had nine romantlo lrrea al ready?" laughed Mary. "Why. you see the tenth time ought to be fatal even for a cat," explained Kitty. "And I'm awfully near engaged to tha only right person at home. In fact, I guess I am engaged by some thing that was er said Just as I was saying; goodby at the dock." Mary gazed at Kitty's peaches and cream complexion, the soft rippling hair and the great pansy ayes and suddenly -r BUCKITIGHAM PALACE MARBLE HALL THIS SPLEXTJID SALON "WAS Bt'ILT BV GEOItOB IV I" HONOR OF HIS OlEEV, AJfD HAS BEEN ADDED TO BV SlBSBftrEXT MOXARCHS AT A COST OF fl,50O,OOO IT HAS 0E OK THE FINEST INTERIORS IX THE WORLD. X King: George has announced his Inten tion of making no alteration in his father's business methods. Amonjr the most Interesting portions of the present Buckingham Palace are the kitchen. They occupy nearly a fourth of the floor space of the base ment and are most elaborately fitted up with the most up-to-date appliances for obtaining the best results in cuisine. King Edward recently had these kitch ens electrified. There are electric ovens, dinh warmers, and even knife cleaners The King's present chef gets $15,000 a year. Buckingham Palace has Its own pri vate theater, situated In the left wing of the palace. This, theater Is the one In which "command" performances; are felt Tesnonsible for her eplsodeless ar rival on the distant shore. Kitty seemed the sort who pimply had to have same-equare-ohlnned person about to tell her when she mustn't eat any more candy. With ber hair down her back, and wear ing spring-heel shoes, she could have traveled on half fare and no questions asked. It was upon the second day of deck tramping that Mary passed Kitty, accom panied by a handsome, dark-eyed chap, the son of one of those Inevitable rich Cuban diplomats always to be found on a ehip'a passenger list, traveling abroad with many children and an Imposing ar ray of servants. They always make a list look so dressy. As Mary Zeal de clared. "First, the ordinary passengers study the names for titles, then for am bassadors, next for actors and actresses, and last of all for possible friends." Kitty's outburst, when tbe two girls met In the main companlonway, waa not re amurine; to a chaperon. "lie's perfectly fascinating! Did you ever see such eyes? And polished! My dear, he makes our American men seem so abrupt and crude. He apologizes and thanks you (for noth ing) every other word and I'm sure he never saw a girl before the way he looked at me!" "How did you happen to meet him?" asked Mary. He apologized, as ueaial." laughed Kitty. "Tou see, he stepped on my foot." "In an American man you would call that abrupt." sniffed Mary. "Wait until you meet him," saH Kitty. A .half hour later the young Cuban stepped on Mary's foot. His apologies were certainly beautiful to listen to. "Your feet are more clumsy than your tongue," said Mary, wrathfully. "Are you trying to atep into society?" Oh! You have guessed !" he admitted with dancing eyes. "It la my UtUa scheme. Is It not a clever one? It was dull. Every one so formal. I think I will have an unhappy time all through. Then, today. I have the grand Idea. I step on a beautiful young lady's foot I am overcome with regrets then she smllo and I say. Is It not a fine day? ' He laughed so frankly that Mary Joined In. He was ap amusing scamp. After dinner Mary sought out Kitty the Irresponsible. Miss Wlldalrs and the Cu ban, Romeo do Gorgonzola, were walk ing the main chair deck, densely popu lated. Mary was tolerant. An hour later Mary Zeal, ohaperon. located Kitty on the upper promenade deck. Mr. de Gorgon sola was probably pointing out objects of Interest In the passing seascape, for they leaned on the rail ani Kitty's atten tion was quite absorbed aa she gazed Into pace. 'Time for somebody to take away the box of chooolates!" thought Mary. "This moonlight isn't good for Kitty of the fickle fancy." Still, she gave Kitty an hour's grace before she Interrupted them. "Oh, here you are. Miss Wlldalrs r aha said briskly. i I i - , i 4Ww4tji ."c4 a.. l is. is given. It la one of the prettiest little theaters In the world and has every necessary appliance for scenic effects. There are over 400 rooms in the pal ace, most of them furnished In a stylo befitting royalty. Queen Alexandra's apartments as well as those of tha late King were on the western side of the palace, overlooking Green Park. . In addition to the $3,170,000 which the King and royal family receive un der the name of the "Civil List." the Prince of Wales gets from what is called the Duchy of Cornwall the tidy little sum of $460,000 a year. When the Prince of Wales marries, he will get an additional annuity. Among other amounts tnar, come There was a wireless) message for you, so I told the steward I would bring it up. You must sign this slip, to be re turned to the purser." Kitty took the message eagerly. "From dear old Tom! I must go In and read It" "Will you not please to come back?" asked the young man, whose face had fallen at the word "Tom." Or, per haps It waa the "dear old" Tom. "Why Kitty Impulsively tore open the envelope and skimmed tbe words. "No I I have aome letters to write," she explained. "Good night, Mr. de Gorgonzola." That distinguished-looking young man you Just saw me talking with knows 'heaps of people that I do," ex plained Kitty, as she. and Mary watched a game of shuffleboard. "And he has had the most wonderful experiences. I do like to talk with interesting peo ple one learns so much." "Is that the reason you smiled at him away across the dlnlng-saloon?" asked Mary severely. "Oh, did you see that awfully unfor tunate Incident?" gasped Kitty. "Now, of course you won't believe me, but truly I didn't Intend to smile at the man. You see, I happened to think of something awfully funny, and I Just glanoed up at that moment and he happened to catch my eye. Well, after ward, up on deck, he came along and hesitated and I had to explain, so that ha wouldn't think" "Humph!" commented Mary. Tm not going to bother about you any more." "Oh. please!" pleaded Kitty. "Really, he la different from that Cuban chap. He Isn't a bit romantic. Why, he's go ing to show me a picture of his factory after dinner and explain how his new Invention does something at one swoop that used to require six castings or something: like that. It's Intensely In teresting and something It will do me good to know about. I thought It was quite a compliment for him to take It for granted that I was capable of understanding such Important, big things." "See that the conversation doesn't drift .from meohanlsms." advised Mary. "He can't talk on any other subject," said Kitty. "His whole heart Is In his workl" At 10:S0 Kitty's education In engin eering feats was still in animated pro gress in a deserted corner of the lounge when a steward handed her a second message from "dear old Tom." Five minutes later the owner of a roll of blue prints was pacing the deck alone, thoughtfully smoking a cigar. "But it . is so heavenly out herel protested Kitty. "I never saw such a moon. Watch it dodge In and out of the clouds. It's all so peaceful , and wonderful." "Might have known there was a 'dear old Tom somewhere," be sighed. INTERIOR OF THRONE ROOM, BUCKINGHAM PALACE ONE OF THE MOST MAGNIFICENT ROOMS IN THE WORLD IS THE ENGLISH THRONK ROOM AT BUCKINGHAM PALACE IT IS HERE THAT COVRT PRESENTATIONS TAKE PLACE, AND MAN V AMERICAN WOMEN HAVE APPEARED HERE. of the "total appropriation under the Civil List are the following salaries: r. Per year. Queen Alexandra Duke of ConnaugM... Princess christian Duchess of Argyll ............. Duchess of Ediirtmrgh Duchess of Albany - Princess Beatrice Frlncess Aurima. of Cambridge Th. Kin1 thru aisterS. . . . . . . . .$350,000 . . 12.1.000 .. .10.000 . . 80.000 . . 80.000 . . 80.000 . .' 30.000 a. ooo SO. 000 It does seem rather strange that out of this enormous appropriation $3. 170.000 an extra sum of $750,000 should be required for the purpose of embellishing Buckingham Palace. However, as the English people seem to think their sovereign Is cheap at the price, this Is what might be called "their own funeral." It Is significant, however, that the King must apply to Parliament for the money to run his establishment. Speaking of funerals reminds us that the late King's obse quies cost the British nation Just $200. 000. The public only see the Tig-ly front facing the Mall, but the rear of the palace is really beautiful; It presents the appearance of a fine old Colonial mansion, the exterior showing beautiful bay windows and columned porticoes. The grounds surrounding the Palace are laid out with artificial lakes, em bankments of flowers and eloping lawna. The lake within the Paiace grounds Is a somewhat extensive one There are boats reserved for royalty on this lake and a special company of royal boatmen is maintained "at an expenditure of about $7,000 a year. These boatmen wear peculiar uniforms, dating back to the time of the early Georgian days, and they still wear the medallions presented to them by Queen Victoria, and which bear her Initials. Once In a while some royal child will take a little excursion on the lalce rowed by one of these ancient boatmen, but usually the little princes prefer to "paddle their own canoe." People are naturally astonished at the enormous appropriation tUlowed this year for the Royal Family of Eng land $3,170.000 211 tlmea more than that received by the President of the United States. It must be borne In mind, however, that this enormous sum- comes to the Royal Family by way of a oompromise. George the Third gave up the Income to the nation from his personal estates that Is, he made over to the country all of the Crown Lands, receiving a lump sum In lieu of his usual revenue. In 1900 these Crown Lands yielded "She is as Intelligent as she Is pretty.' Silence and an occasional "How in teresting!" often pass for comp'ete comprehension. Mary didn't count against Kitty the scores of youths whom she soon came to know well enough to exchange a few words with In passing, nor an oc casional tarn on deck. Mary herself was usually In the center of these groups. Her next objection to one of Kitty's acquaintances was the son of an old lady to whom 'Kitty had given a dose of the famous Motherslll rem edy. Every girl on board had her eye on him from the first hour of sailing. His Interest In Kitty was marked from their Introduction. Had not Kitty told Mary a lot about Tom and their long friendship, and given a very convincing Idea of what a mighty splendid chap Tom was, Mary Zeal would have thought that, perhaps, after all. Fate had other plans for Kitty. Young Trent certainly meas ured up to all that any girl could ask. But Mary was now firmly on Tom's side, and she watched Kitty's interest grow in alarm. Perhaps Kitty doesn't seem worthy of so much solicitude on Mary's part, but when one stops to think. Isn't the world full of settled down Kittles, who once upon a time were a bit too impressionable and In clined to make a storybook hero of the nearest available material? Mary sym pathized with Kitty In this Instance, though- she didn't in the least approve when she saw they were nearly the last ones left on deck late that even ing. While Trent was searching for a .tearaer rug Mary urged Kitty to go down to her stateroom. "I knowt" agreed Mary. "I could lis ten to the swish and rustle of the water forever. This ship must have on sllk-llned petticoats to make that sound. But. really, you mustn't stay out any longer." "You stay and chaperon me but please dont make me go down," sighed Kitty. "Why you can't make me!" Bhe boasted. "Then suit yonrself," said Mary. "Oh. I forgot I promised to give this wire less to you." Kitty read K In the Btiaft of light that came out of the adjacent music room. Then ahe went over and leaned on the rail and held her head In her hand. "I found one." announced Trent, com ing out of a doorway. "Why I think ni go down," said Kitty, slowly. Kitty's messages came with almost clocklike regularity the entire eight days at sea. always, apparently, at the most inopportune moments. Til be engaged in. spite of myself it those reminding messages fail to come after I get to London," she said ' to Mary the day of expected! landing. to the Treasury an Income , of $2.1'.7, 000. and they have considerably in creased since that time. If the Kings of England had not disposed of their lards to Parliament they would have been among the most wealthy people in the world today. The Czar of Russia hung on to his Crown Lands, with the result that he receives nearly twice as much as the King of Ensland, while the German F-mperor gets $4,500,000. the Austrian Emperor, $3,900,000, and the Italian King. $3,070,000. All things considered, the British Kings are not such an expensive lux ury, particularly In view of the factj that they are expected to spend a large . portion of their income In publlo works, i ' The King lays out a large portion of his money on public works and keeps i up a number of offices, some of which are very weird. For instance, there Is an official "Rat Catcher and Turn- i cock" at Buckingham Palace who gets $1200 a year. A perpetual pension at- caches to the Duchy of Lancaster called '. "Butlerage on Wines." which costs $4000 a yoar. The "King's plates" for , Scotland cost $1400 a year, and for Ire- I land $6800. The "King's limner" gets $500 a year, while his Historiographer j gets $920 a year. The Royal Clock- : maker only gets $80 a year. 10 times less than the Rat Catcher and Turn cock. In addition to the combined Rst Catcher and Turncock at Buckingham Palace, there is an official Turncock who lets on the water at Windsor. He gets $1000 a year for turning on the spigot and don't have to catch any rats at all. Another costly Item of royal expense are the yachts which Sir Charles Dilke estimates at an annual cost of $500,000. While the "Civil List" gives the monarch $3,170,000 a year, he is only entitled to the paltry sum of $300,000 a year for his own use. However, by a certain amount of Ingenuity he can augment this sum considerably by sav ing his expense money, and also by not employing certain household offi-1 cials. whose salaries he thus saves, but whose services he Is permitted to dis pense with. . ' While the people of England delight In considering their monarch simply a political figure-head, the huge revenue at his disposal gives him a great pow er. Altogether, it might be said that the English Monarch is a very expen sive luxury even for the lord-loving Britisher. i London. August L He's going to London and then to Paris, Just as we are! Im sure my parents will approve of him or would if It were not for for Tom. Really, I do care for Tom but I'm all mixed up ao I don't know my own mind. I told him about Tom at first, so I've not that on my conscience in case you see those wireless words always keep me from making any hasty de cision." And then came the wild confusion of landing, hurried farewells and hubbub. Mary lost sight of Kitty In the crowd and it was not until the luggage In spection that she saw her again. Kitty was talking to her parents but at the same time she was gazing Into the eyes of a tall young man. A very, very nice, square-chinned young man. It was not Trent. "Oh. Mary Zeal!" shrieked Kitty. "Look here's Tom! Isn't it wonder ful? He came on the Lusltania right after me. Intended to come all the time as a surprise. ' And he says he never sent me a single wireless! Now, who " "The operator must have caught his thoughts on that marvelous little ap paratus." suggested MaVy. "I had a wireless chaperon!" said Kitty, sitting down suddenly on a trunk. "You dear Mary Zeal!" Hatched Fish and Mosqnttoea. , New York Sun. "The most Interesting letters received at the aquarium are those written by persons who live in a mosquito-infested neighborhood." said the guardian of the city's fish. "Those pestered humans have hoard that newly-hatched fish prefer a diet of mosquitoes, and they write urgent appeals for us to come and skim a few millions of young mosquitoes off tha surface of a neighboring pond before the mosquitoes get big enough to require ' a diet of their own." Tbe Knocker, Tanker's Statesman. ( She had a little hammer. Bhe used it with a will. She knocked at everybody They couldn't kea her arm; Che knocked about her neighbors .If they were friends or foes. Bhe knocked about the table And knocked about her clotbss. She knocked at hubby's smoking: About his snoring, too; She knocked about his whistling And, so, perhaps, would you. At last the Reaper claimed her. Her course on earth was run; Eer husband then considered Her knocking daya were dona. But hubby went one evening To see a spirit show. Where always, in the gloaming. The spirits come and so. ' , He heard a spirit knocking i "My wife." be said. "Ill bet! V Now Isn't she a wonder? i Hear that! She's knocking vetl ;