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About The Sunday Oregonian. (Portland, Ore.) 1881-current | View Entire Issue (Aug. 9, 1908)
THE SUNDAY OREGONIAN, PORTLAND, AUGUST 0, 1908. - ttnrA sWB .h Mm Jmnw Ivern of. wiiwpomej Rv MARGARET B. DOWXI OF the four women whom the action of the National conventions has placed in such conspicuous guise before the American people only Mrs. John Worth Kern, of Indianapolis. Is a comparative stranger to the social official world of Washington, and to the country at large. But Mrs. Kern possesses quali ties which argue against her remaining unknown even if the second place among the woman kind of the land does not fall to her lot. She is younger than the majority of matrons to whom such potential honors are possible. Her friends give her every qualification which would argue a successful social career even among experienced leaders at the ' Na tional capital. "I am rather dismayed at the formid able list of requisites for living in Wash ington." said Mrs. Kern not long after her husband s selection as Bryan's run ning mate, "and some or my optlm:stlc friends suggest that I get in a social secretary at onre and begin to look up the duties of my position. But I shall wait. 1 find that life In a state capital Is just a miniature of life at the National Capital, so having mastered the details nf the one. I hope not to find the other too involved to solve, should I have oc casion lo solve it. But I am not inclined to place too high a rating on mere social Intercourse. I should look forward to other things with keener pleasure, should I live in Washington. The opportunity for seeking wisdom at the fountain head Is one which appeals very strongly. "Shortly after Mr. Kern was nominated I expressed some views about canteens, liquor laws and civic reform which seemed to horrify the country, and it was gently suggested to me from high po litical sources that I was not running for the office of Vice-President of the United States and as I was very close to one who was perhaps 1 should refrain from discussing such questions too frankly. Now, I have always been ac customed to take an interest in such things and to express my opinion quite freely. That 1 should now refrain from giving my views seems one of the penal ties of a possible honor. I have always workd earnestly for the temperance question and I am myself a total ab stainer, as is every member of my house hold. But this has not prevented my taking a strong Interest In the canteen and from doing my small but whole hearted best to have the canteen re stored. Many eminent temperance work ers are of my way of thinking. "However, I do not see why my. pri vate views on any subject should com promise the Democratic Vice-Presidential candidate, nor be taken as an echo of Mr. Kern"s convictions. Many of the happiest husbands and wives think dif ferently on grayer subjects. For instance, I do not take just the same view of this Vice-Presidential selection as Mr. Kern does. I feel solicitude for my husband's health and I saw him overworked during his campaigns for governor, and no honor which could seriously affect his health Is welcome to me. and no party loyalty nor the considerations of the higher policy could appeal to me above the personal welfare of those whom I love and cher ish. But of course with Mr. Kern the focus point is different." Mrs." Kern is a handsome woman of the blonde type, many years the senior of her husband. She was married In 1895 and has lived In Indianapolis only since that date. But she is deepty attached to her home, there and to the constantly in creasing circle of friends formed during her 13 years' residence. "A peculiarity of the Western cities," she said, "is that the home is paramount UNCLE SAM'S newest time-saver the vacuum tube for mall transmis sionis ready for final demonstra tion in Chicago. Tiie Government's ex pert commission on postal pneumatics, of which Postmaster Daniel A. Campbell, of Chicago, Is chairman. Is to make an exhaustive series of tests of the new device, and as the tube has successfully stood every unofficial trial. It Is pre dicted that the mail of millions In a dozen leading American cities will, with in two years, be handled underground by the power of vacuum. News of the discovery of a method for using vacuum in the postal service cre ated a sensation all over the country six months ago. Great interest was aroused in New York, where general us of pneumatic tubes has been impos sible up to this time. In Baltimore. Pittsburg. Cincinnati. Kansas City. Omaha and San " Francisco, where the business interests have demanded quicker mail service, there was increased hope of relief. Now it is announced that from success of the new Invention In Chi cago all the cities named, and a number of others, will probably see their hopes real iced. As soon as th principle of vacuum service was determined a tube two feet In diameter, then the largest and only one In the world, was constructed. Pack ages were sent through It at the rate of two miles1 a minute. A carrier with a load of 14"0 pounds was several times shot through the concrete bore at great velocity. At this point the Postal Department "got busy." James M. Masten. General ' Superintendent of the Railway Mall Serv ice, arrived from Washington in Chicago and Inspected the tube. He marveled at the possibilities of bettering municipal mail conditions, and Postmaster Camp bell and half a score of Department sup erlntndents in Chicago were sum moned. Mr. Stoetzel, the inventor, was asked If It were possible to construct a tube larger than two feet in diameter. "Of course," replied Stoetiel. "I am going to build a tube six feet in diameter right amy, and just to make it more Interesting I will construct It so passen gers "ill be able to travel through .It In comfort. It stands to reason that where passengers may ride, large quan tities of mail can be carried." Mr. Masten responded with a skepti cal nod. but ilr. Stoetzel persisted, and that was how the biggest vacuum tube ever constructed happened to be built. Stoetzel. who is superintendent of con struction for the I'niversal Pneumatic Transmission Comiany. went out to For est Park, on the western edge of Chicago. Engineers' with whom he consulted laughed. His idea, to them, was a dream. The park was surveyed and a course of half a mile was laid out for the tube, which the engineers referred to as the "wind railway in a bottle." In four months Stoetzel's force had burrowed into the ground, channelled under and around a little lake and built a concrete tube with plate glass roof wherever the winding, twisting bore reached up to the surface of the ground. When the tube was completed a few days ago. Sioetxel had ready a dozen cars with steel frames such as Uncle Sam's mail wagons affect. "I had a few scats put in "em so hey'd look the part and make It easy CG. eSS3v7vrr"i.s a . X. a N t I E H I I democratic! I I 1 S?7- VICE-PRESIDENT- 8 V 1AL CANDIDA! f ) I : V model- ' V f7Z- J ) HOUSEKEEPER", VU f' v V 'ifa T J YET ACTIVE IN j ' ' IZl SV i WOf?KOF (yk Vr? 1 : reform "r " i "f J with the social leaders. In Indianapolis when one says of a woman that she is a good housekeeper it means that she exercises personal sup?rvision over her home and that every detail is arranged. We are all very fond of having this designation good housekeeper conferred on us and we feel more pleased than if our social qualifications and accomplish ments are recounted. Good housekeepers with us mean those who prepare or have prepared under cooks of their own train ing the bread and cakes and pastry and the salads for the most formal enter tainment. No bakery pies or bought cakes enter into our scheme of life, and even the ices and most difficult varieties of meats are prepared in the home kitchen. Home-mada preserves and pickles and relishes are the delight and the pride at every kneneon or dinner. We still like to hemstitch our sheets and to embroider initials on the napery and bed linen, and some of the Indian apolis women are even so old-fashioned as to have their husband's shirts made at home Instead of In factory. That is what we call keeping house properly, and we cling to traditions most tena ciously In the Hoosier state. ' . As in the case of the Taft and Sher - U- A. FOUR FOOT FOR CAStHYIMG PlAlLkf THAT WILL ALiO ' ' l while we're traveling." Stoetzel ex plained when the cars were delivered. Mayor Fred Busse, who was Chicago's postmaster before he became the city's chief executive, squeezed his big bulk into one of the narrow seats beside his friend. Postmaster Campbell, in one of the first cars to shoot through the con crete bore. Behind them In the same car were ten other city officials. "Are you all ready?" queried Stoetzel or the party. "Ready is right." answered the Mayor In his characteristic fashion. "I'm game to go the whole route, and don't care what " The Mayor's departing words were lost as an exhaust fan drew the air from the tube In front of him, and the car darted forward. Its whirring wheels filling the tunnel with a roar. Sixty seconds later the car rumbled around the final curve of the tube, a heavy Iron door closing the exit, opened automatically, and the car rolled down to a platform adjoining the entrance. "Say," shouted Mayor Busse. in de light, "that'a fine business; that going man families, ties of long-standing friendship united the Bryans and the Kerns. Last Winter Mrs. Bryan and her daughter, Mrs. Leavltt, spent a few days with the Kerns and were most hospitably entertained. Mr. Bryan came later in the season, and remained some time consulting the Indiana politicians. Of this vl3lt a characteristic story is told of Mrs. Kern and her small boys. She prepared a feast and invited all the trusty lieutenants to meet the great chief, but she wished the feast to be a family affair, so the small boys, John Worth, Jr., and William Cooper were installed In state at the banquet board. But previously their mother had given instructions. "Now," she ad monished, "I do not wish to hear you boys have a word to say about any thing which comes on the table. I am going to have strawberries for dessert and I do not want you to say a word not a word even if it is February. Just act like you have strawberries every day during the Winter. It is, you know, very bad manners to talk about what Is on the table." The little fellows, true to orders, never even lifted an eyebrow when an exquisite crystal dish in which the berries nestled In their TI ft fc. 001 f T LI some; makes you feel like a love letter, special delivery, eh, Dan?'," "It's a good game," replied the post master. "Let's try It again." This they did, several times, in fact, staying to see a car bearing 2500 pounds of cement bags sent over the half-mile route In half a minute. A multitude of sensations crowd upon one another as a passenger rides through the tube. The quick change from light to darkness as the car plunges into the black bore startles one. The air is filled with the hum of the whirring fan. The car Beems to float as It speeds ahead. The slightly rarified atmos phere brings an exalted feeling. Tho nerves become tense and the muscles rigid. Passengers In the front seats peer searchlngly out through the thick plate glass, seeking to discern In the dimly lighted bore the sharp curves they know to be there. The passengers who expect a plunge Into vacuum to be accompanied by dis tress such as characterizes mountain tris. are disappointed. The Idea of vacuum carries to them a foliage was placed before the mother. But Mr. Bryan, being a farmer, was much excited. "Such strawberries In February!" he exclaimed, "beautiful and the flavor is delicious," and he complimented Mrs. Kern again and again. Whether Mr. Kern had also re ceived private Instructions is not di vulged, but while he looked Immense ly amused over his guest's enthusi asm, he offered no observation. The little boys kept a watchful eye on the performance and looked at their father inquiringly. As soon as the gentlemen had disappeared, Master William Cooper Kern, aged 5 years, leaned over to his mother and said confidentially, "Mother, Mr. Bryan hasn't as good manners as papa, has he?" The Kern fortune is a moderate one, and If they should be called to higher things, pretentious entertainments will be as much out of their line as It will be for the Shermans should they get the coveted position. But no one can imagine Mrs. Kern as encroaching on the Bryans in the White House, accord ing to the pact made at this selfsame dinner, in which the strawberries fig ured. The White House Is large and thought of bleeding noses and throbbing ears. They anticipate a startling change In the atmosphere, whereas, nothing of the sort happens. The sensation felt Is that of softly floating through the air, and those who have had experience say It resembles closely balloon traveling. The difference in atmospheric pressure amounts to less than one ounce to a square Inch. Chicago expects to be the first city In the world to be given the benefits of vacuum tube service. The City Council Is considering passage of an ordinance authorizing the construction of SO miles of tubes four feet In diameter, to be used for carrying the mails and for the distribution throughout the city of ex press, freight matter, packages and store deliveries. Application for the ordi nance has been made by the Universal Pneumatic Transmission Company, act ing in the Interest of Stoetzel. The pro ject has been Indorsed by the Chicago Association of Commerce, whose mem bers see in It a solution of street con gestion In Chicago. When it is considered that the big stores of Chicago pay more than $150,- 000 a week for this Item alone, and that euch a tube system would take 60 per cent of the traffic from the streets In the congested district, it will be under stood why the commercial interests are so enthusiastic In their Indorsement of the new method of transportation. So important are the changes In pros pect from use of vacuum that the Gen eral Government found it Imperative to make Immediate study of the entire sub ject of pneumatic mail service. The re sult was the commission headed by Chi cago's postmaster, and including besides Mr. Masten, of Washington; George H. Roberts, P. M., Brooklyn; E. C. Mans field. P. M., Boston; Frank H. Wyman, P. M., St. Louis; Joseph Stewart, Sup erintendent of Railroad Adjustments; V. J. Bradley, Superintendent of Railway Mail Service; E. M. Norris. Superinten dent of Salaries and Allowances. The commission will report to Congress on the adaptability and cost of the vacuum tubes, with advice as to what cities may be given them, whether the Government should own the system or have them operated by private interests. New York, . Philadelphia. Boston and Chicago now have limited pneumatic tube roomy, thanks to the forethought of the Roosevelts, but it is not large enough for two queens to hold court. Then Mrs. Kern possesses that trend of character that she would prefer apartments In a modest flat to such an arrangement as Mr. Bryan sug gested. But in spit'e of all things said to the contrary, one may live very comfortably on $12,000 a year in Wash ington with a little managing, and this latter quality is the one In which Mrs. Kern excels. Those who remember of the regime of the Stevensons recall that they lived' in a modest set of rooms in the Normandie, which is not one of th'e large nor fashionable hotels of Washington. Yet they maintained the dignified state incumbent on the heir apparent of the Presidency and kept up the traditions most scrup ulously. In Indianapolis. Mrs. Kern has the rep utation of giving recherche and perfectly-appointed entertainments. She is fond of society and has always been frank about her belief that it constitutes a lever to uplift the family fortunes. She be longs to many clubs and is constantly entertaining the members of it and of her church and philanthropic societies. All servlces for postal purposes. These sys tems, however, all operate by compress air. and it is impossible to use tubes of more than eight Inches diameter. The result Is considerable delay in all cities' at postoffices and railway stations, it being necessary to open the letter sacks and fill the tube carriers with small bundles of letters. Only part of the letter mail may be handled In existing systems, while with vacuum tubes newfpapers, packages and letters all may go forward at a speed of two miles or more a minute, four or five times the present speed In tubes. It is considered likely that the Govern ment commission will, In its preliminary report, to be made next Winter, recom mend that tubes In all cities be of .uni form size, prob'ably four feet in diameter, that they may eventually become units In countrywide system of mail and ex press tubes, with interchangeable carriers. Genius and Its Imitations. London Saturday Review. Lord Rosebery's character sketch of Lord Kelvin was fine and pointed. "What most struck me was his tenacity, his la boriousness, his indefatigable humility. In him was visible none of the supercilious ness and scorn which sometimes embar rass the strongest Intellects. Without condescension he placed himself at once on a level with his companion. That has seemed to me characteristic of such great men of science as I have met." We have often wondertd how it is that while the great men of science the Dar wlns, Kelvins are like this, the smaller men. the men who have never originated anything, but have merely tried to suck in the ideas of the masters, so often are im patient, spiteful, Jealous, assertive, im pressed as profoundly by their own supe riority as by the stupidity of nine-tenths of humanity. That this is the attitude of the lesser fry of science, its sticklebacks and tadpoles, no one will deny. The little scientist Is almost Invariably too- clever by half. He hangs up pictures of Darwin in his study. His talk is of Darwin. Yet he has as little of the heart as he has of the brain of that great master. A seed store in Cortlandt street, N'er York, ban grass plots shipped daily from Jersey 'itv. The plots consist of shallow boxes filled with earth in which the grass is grown. The plots axe sold by the foot- . the Kerns are Presbyterians and hold membership in the Tabernacle Presbyte rian Church. Mrs. Kern is president of the board of managers which controls the Eleanor Hospital and she has accom plished wonders in financing its recent Improvements. She is a consistent mem ber of several clubs which have munlcl pal reform at heart, as the curtailing of the liquor traffic and the sanitation 01 schools and the habitations of the poor. She belongs to clubs which promote equal suffrage. In fact she seems that rare combination of a club woman who takes the time to make her home happy and comfortable. Mrs. Kern was married in 1S05 at her parents' home In Kokomo. She is. how ever, a native of Muncie, Ind., and spent nearly all her girlhood in that town. She is the daughter of Mr. and Mrs. William Cooper and received her education In Muncie and part in New York. She is the second wife of Mr. Kern and to her credit that she Is devoted to the daughter of the first marriage. Miss Julia Kern. It is vastly amusing that many people who do not know that Miss Julia Is the step-daughter of the present Mrs. Kern re mark the resemblance between the two and compliment Mrs. Kern on looking so MID-SUMMER HUMOR Eve's Epigrams. New York Telegram. One doesn't necessarily have to live on the ocean to be a lighthouse-keeper in the most onerous sense of the term. Living in the same house with an in ordinately clever person is worse than a steady diet of cayenne pepper. Wisdom sits in the market place and weeps because she's such an everlast ing bore nobody wants her even to chaperone a Sunday-school picnic. When philosophers can give us some thing more comforting to think about in the dark it will be time enough to quit believing in Heaven's angels. A rose by any other name might cmell as sweet, but tho "phychologlcal moment" called anything else wouldn't sound nearly so convincingly intel lectual. Cupid usually shies off from the woman who wears the common-sense shoes because he has a deep-rooted suspicion that she'll make him shine them. Glviiifr "The Old Man" a Chance. Philadelphia Ttecord. In these days of rampant feminism, a man Is not much besides the son of his mother, the husband of his wife and the father of his daughter. All his virtues, if he have any. he inherited from his mother; the "old man" never cuts any figure In heredity except to explain any mean traits he may pos sess. If he has ever attained anything it was his wife, who was the making of him. The principal purpose of his existence is to give his daughter a good time. Under these circumstances It Is not singular that some highly im aginative correspondent undoubtedly a woman put in circulation the story that Mrs. Kern writes her husband's speeches for him. It is a relief to learn on her authority that the Democratic candidate for Vice-President writes his own speeches. Mrs. Kern, who has two boys, confines her energies to tho domestic side of the Kern establish ment. Why, of Course! The editor of an agricultural paper was grumbling about a puzzling ques tion he had received from a city man who had recently removed to the coun try. The inquiry was this: "Will you kindly tell me how long cows should be milked?" The office boy, passing near, heard hia superior repeating tho question aloud. "'Scuse me, boss," he said, "but why don't yer tell him jes' de same's short cows ?" Judge. Rights Respected. Washington Evening Star. "You will admit that even a man who disagrees with you is entitled to his opin ions." "Of course he's entitled to them," an swered Mr. Sirius Barker; "that's why I insist on his keeping his opinions to him self Instead of carelessly scattering them around." Are You Kirstakostoepsomaniac? New York World. If you have no mustache, whiskers or beard upon. your face you most certainly are not a kirstakostoepsomaniac. The word is applied by scientists to describe those nervous men who are addicted to young. She and Miss Julia are so chum my as to reverse the old adage about stepmothers. Mrs. Kern is always care ful to show all the deference due her young daughter and to make her first In every possible way. "We four constitute the Kern family." she said in speaking of Miss Julia, "and we never do anything except together. Thus we got the tele gram from Mr. Kern on the night of his nomination It was addressed 'To the Kern family,' and said simply. 'They have nominated me. God bless you all.' We cogitated a long time how to reply for such an opportunity for epigram does not occur often in one's life time. Julia said to say, "God bless you. We will nil support you.' But after all we sent some thing much more prosaic. 'With love, con gratulations and hearty .support' and signed "The. Kern family.' " Mrs. Kern and Miss Julia are locally famous for their good taste in dress. Neither is ever extreme, yet both are named simultaneously when an Indian apolis woman is talking of those who are well gowned. Mies Julia, like Mis. Kern, Is very fond of society. As a leader of the young' set. she is well versed In all the necessary accom plishments. She is a superb pianist, and has several times discussed going abroad to perfect her studies. But she is averse to even temporary expatria tion, but has consoled herself by taking lessons from the best available Ameri can teachers. She graduated with high honors at the Girls' Classical School in Indianapolis, and then took a finishing course at Miss Gardener's Institute in New York City. She is a member of all the select athletic organizations and the Country Club, and is a good tennis player and can hold her own In golf and at the hunt. From her mother, who was Miss Julia Hazard, she Inherited a com fortable Income. The small boys are 9 and 5. but quite, Important members or the family. The elder, William, Jr., or Bill, goes to the public school, but his brother stilt learns his lessons at home, with an oc. casional dip into kindergarten methods in a private school nearby. Mrs. Kern is an enthusiast over kindergartens and has labored unceasingly until they have been established In almost every section of Indiana. She has mastered all the details of the science, and could get a diploma at any time she put In her ap plication. She believes In the softening Influence on the character and the ten dency to Instill thrifty and methodical habits. Mr. and Mrs. Kern reside In Pennsyl vania street, a broad, shaded avenue, lined with comfortable and elegant homes. Theirs Is one of the least pre tentious homes In the vicinity, a cot tage of about 12 rooms, with wide, hos pitable porches, and the most exquisite flowers and shruLs on the veranda and lawn. The same dainty ornaments, namely, flowering plants, give the home in the Winter the indescribable air of elegance that marks It during the balmy weather. They gathered many curios and interesting souvenirs for the? home and all the furnishings are the result of Mrs. Kern's personal super vision. Her rooms are all after soma well-defined model, such as a French sitting-room, a colonial dining-room and a Flemish hall. Mrs. Kern has paid only passing visits to the National cap ital, but it is her intention to become better acquainted with the capital of her country, even if she does not reach the pinnacle to which her husband as pires. (Copyright, 1908, by Margaret B. Downing:.) the habit of twirling their mustaches in a kind of frenzy of meditation, or when much upset. In the, first syllable you see the root "kirkos," which means a circle. Perhaps, however, you may be an un convicted otodactyloinaniac. In all prob ability you are. Did you ever see a man with his first finger in his ear and ills arm forming an angle of 67V- degrees, ringing away - at his auricular pendant with an energy that knows no surcease. That man is suffering from oloduotylo mania. Science shirks at nothing and Its records must be given to the world. Could you guess, for Instance, what is the meaning of the highly criminal social offense known as rhinodactylomanlac? No? Well, then, you have often sat in a trolley car opposite a lady accompanied by a chl',d who, when It has nothing more interesting to do, puts its fingers to Its nose and. In a fit of deep abstraction, proceeds to "play" upon that minute pro boscis till its mother calls the naughty fingers off. This little criminal is a rhinodactylomanlac of the deepest dye. Only the Truth. Llpplncott's Two tramps approached a railroad telegraph office not far from New York the other day and looked hungrily through the wndow, but there was not even a dinner pail in sight to induce them to ask for food. One of them, finally tapped on the window, and the operator left his key long enough to inquire: "Well, what can I do for you?" "Just report two empties going east," replied the tramp, with a grin, and started down the track toward New York. How He Knew Them. Mr. O'Flannagan's great pride wai to parade the neighborhood with one of his 10-months" twins on each arm. So exactly alike did these treasures look that one of the neighbors finally in quired: "Mr. O'Flannagan. I've been wonderin how on the grane airth d'ye tell them twins o' yours apart?" "Oh, lt' aisy. I jist put me finger In Pat's mouth, and if he boltes me, it's Pete." Fooling Away Your Sloney. Atchison Globe. It is surprising how many people die at poor farms. And every one of then fooled his money away as, you do. and Imagined he would be rich some day. First Aisle to the Left. Judge. Teacher Johnny, where is the Isle of Man? Johnny In the gents' furnishln' de partment. A Paying Treatment. Yonkers Statesman. "What's to ba done when a child swal lows a cent, doctor?" "Make the parents cough up two dol lars"' Girl Marries Her Yalot. Atchison Globe. At 16 a girl starts out to look for a fairy prince, and at 20 she marries her valet, and thinks she has found him. Suggestion. Knicker Would you muzzle all dogs? Bocker Yes, and their owners, too. a 1 r I 1
