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About The Sunday Oregonian. (Portland, Ore.) 1881-current | View Entire Issue (June 3, 1900)
;n sj,-sap?-f,fqifpi'W"9 B THE SUNDAY 0REG0KIA2T, PORTLAND, JUNE, 3, 1900. 'P9H( its regameut. "tntered at the PostoSJce at Portland, Oregon, as second-class matter. teiephoxes. Editorial Itaams.... 163 1 Business Offlce CCT REVISED SUBSCRIPTION' RATES. Br Mall (postage prepaid), la Advance Sally, with Sunday,, per month $0 83 Dally, Sunday excepted, per year... 7 SO Dally, trlth Sunday, per year 8 00 Sunday, per year . 2 00 Tb Weekly, per year, 1 50 xb weekly, 3 months.. .. 50 To City Snbcribers Dally, per week. delHered. Sundays excepted.l5c Dally, per week. delivered. Sundays lncluded.20c News or discussion Intended for publication la The Oregonlan should be addressed Invariably "Editor "The Oregonlan," not to the name of any Individual. Letters relating to ad-ertlslng. subscriptions or to any business matter should be addressed simply "The Oregonlan." The Oregonlan does not buy poems or stories irom Individuals, and cannot undertake to re tarn any manuscripts sent to Jt without solicita tion. No stamps should be Inclosed for this pur pose. Puget Sound Bureau Captain A. Thompson. offlce at 1111 Pacific avenue. Tacoma. Box DM, Tacoma Postofflce, Eastern Business Omce The Tribune building. New York city; "The Rookery." Chicago; the E. C Beckwlth special agency, New York. For sale In San Francisco by J. JC Cooper. 740 SJarket street, near th Palace hotel, and at Coldsmlth Bros.. 230 Sutter street. For sale In Chicago by the P. O. News Co., 817 Dearborn strre. - TODAY'S WEATHER. ralr and continued Varm; northerly winds. . PORTLAND, SI'XDAY, JUNE 3, 1900. The Oregonlan fully believes there is too need of amending- the Constitution Of trie state so as to add to the num ber of Justices of the Supreme Court. The "way to relieve the Supreme Court is through enactment of a law that would limit the power or right of ap peal and shut out petty cases. Every body but small lawyers and their liti gious clients would approve such an act. The abuse of petty litigation is extreme, and the burden It throws on the public is constantly heavy. Mene xiius says. In "Coriolanus": "You wear out a good, wholesome forenoon in bearing a cause between an orange wife and a fosset seller, and then ad journ the controversy of three-pence to a second day of audience." It is causes of this description that take up the time of our courts. The proper remedy lies in the Legislature. There has never been a time when the complexion of Congress meant so much to Oregon as it does today. The fight for the gold standard was a fight for the whole country. The fight for ex pansion is peculiarly our own fight. On this question Congress Is all-powerful. Governmental policies are made in Con gress. The President Is practically powerless. If we are to have Pacific expansion, we must have .an expansion Senate and an expansion House. There is no way to get expansionists In the House but by voting for Republican Representatives. There Is no way to get expansionists in the Senate but by electing a Republican Legislature. The prosperity of the Pacific Coast and the future of Oregon are bound up in a Re publican victory tomorrow. Here is a duty that lies upon every man alike. Every vote against the Republican Representatives and against the Re publican Legislative ticket is a vote to turn Congress and therefore the pollcy of the Government over to the antls. Upon this subject the interests of all coincide. Every man, be he Republi can, Democrat, Populist or Prohibition ist, owes It to his state and his poster ity to vote the Republican Congres sional and Legislative ticket. It would be money in our pockets to make the election unanimous. Compared with this June election, the event of November is of little conse quence. The essential thing for us is the complexion of Congress. It Is Con gress, and Congress alone, that accept ed Hawaii, fixed the status of Porto Rico, passed upon the treaty of Paris, and that must determine the disposi tion of the Philippines. If we had a President like Cleveland, Jackson or Grant, some Influence might go out irom the White House upon the actions of Congress. But it Is Impossible for a President to be more subservient to the purposes of Congress than McKlnley is. He advocated free trade with Porto Hlco, but when Congress formed other plans he recognized it is Immaterial whelner he expressed himself as still of that mind or converted to other views. What the President thinks, in 1900 or 1901, will make no difference. 3t is in Congress that our fate will be sealed. It is to Congress that we must look, if anywhere, for policies that will assert our sovereignty In the Pacific and guarantee us a chance to do busi ness in Asia. Congress is all-important. At this critical hour no man who ex pects to live and do business, hire help or work for wages, on the Pacific Coast, can afford to strike a blow at Pacific expansion by sacrificing the Republi can ticket. The fight on the Republican cause in Oregon is made by men who profess to be Republicans, but who are really for official pelf. If there is any money in Working for Republican success, they are Republicans. If not, they are Citi zens. The number of voters in Oregon to whom this sort of politics appears "worthy of approval should be small indeed. The character of the opposition to the Republican cause is revealed in the na ture of their struggle. They have made a campaign of roorbacks. On the real issues of the contest, silver and ex pansion, they have confessed judgment by remaining silent. Even the desire to rescue Mitchell and McBrlde from oblivion, though it is universally appre hended, has been sedulously concealed. The argument against Mr. Rowe is that he is not a friend of labor and that he robbed poor railroad men of (their earnings, stories that have been thorughly exploded. The fight against sheriff Frazler consists of complaint of pings he never did to Tom Jordan and js the bicycle tax. The anonymous clr- us against Sewall have been pub- I disowned by men whose names used in their support. The fight oxi Professor Robinson is the false as sertion that he was an "A. P. A." As persions, subsequently shown to be ma- Mclous fabrications, have been made igainst Charles McDonell's army rec- aided by garbling of his utterances. r. Brewster bases his argument linst Long on acts that Long never immitted. The fight on Engineer Chase is for a long list of offenses with rhlch he had nothing to do, and for Imaginary grievances of Mr. Austin. "What is the objection to Mackav: lat he robs the city by selling it lum ber at exorbitant rates shown to be a sure Invention, "What is the objection to Farrell? That be sells the city hay at double prices and short weights charges without a shadow of fact to support them. What have they got against Ross? That he is trying to steal the Marquam Grand that is, he is manager of a company that is trying to collect what is coming to it. What is the charge against Bates? That ho has bulldozed the Water Committee to sacrifice the city's Interests to his when the fact is that no such sacrifice has been made, and that, if it were at tempted, the committee would stand 18 to 1 against him. Mr. Moody has been accused of unfriendliness to labor he never showed, and assailed with a Democratic railroad plank that was never adopted. Mr. Tongue has been charged with betrayal of Yaqulna Bay and the Indian War Veterans, the two causes for which he has worked tooth and toenail, night and day. If the aggregation has any genu ine facts on Its side or worthy cause to appeal for, it la a wonder they have concealed them so deftly. WOMAN" SUFFRAGE. Though duties of men and of women touch at nearly every point, neverthe less there is a broad general line of dif ference between them. Woman's du ties He In the home; man's duties in the outer world. Government is a sub ject that belongs especially to the latter range or order of things. Thus, nature has established distinc tions between men and women that never can be overpassed. Government is as clearly among the functions that belong to man as those of wife, mother and home-keeper belong to woman. It Is only those who are dissatisfied with the ordinances of nature, as well as with the ordinances of society, which are founded on nature, or those who follow merely sentimental theories, who desire to bring woman, through grant of the suffrage, into a position good neither for herself, for society nor for government. There is far too little deliberation in exercise of the suffrage now. Introduc tion of the feminine element would im mensely Increase this evil. For women as a rule are less deliberate than men. A due sense of the proportion of things; an adequate subordination of impulse to reason; an habitual regard to the ultimate and distant consequences of political measures; a sound, sober and unexaggerated Judgment, are elements which already are lamentably wanting in political life, and female suffrage certainly would not tend to Increase them. Moreover, with women, even more than with men, there is a strong disposition to overrate the curative powers of legislation, to attempt to mould the lives of all persons in their details by meddlesome or restraining laws, and the vast increase of female influence which the suffrage would give could hardly fall to increase that habit of excessive legislation which is one of the great evils of the time. Let it not be forgotten either that the suffrage would be conferred not merely on the better class, but also on the Inferior class and worse class of women. Woman suffragists, whether men or women, make the mistake of Idealization here. They think of even woman as a pure, intelligent, cultivated person; they build on the emotional, the Impulsive and the romantic ele ments of character, and they choose to disregard the fact that through the measure they advocate ignorance and irresponsibility will also be Introduced into the suffrage, in even greater pro portions than we find them now. For women as a class have not the knowl edge of large affairs that men as a class possess deplorably deficient as the lat ter are; and all the evils that belong to indiscriminate male suffrage would be more than doubled by indiscriminate suffrage to women. The state is heavily overloaded now. Whether It could carry this vast addition to its topheavy load may well be doubted. Besides, it may as well be remembered that the con servative woman as a rule is probably feminine and likely to stay at home, while the radical woman is pretty sure to go forth rejoicing to the fray. Nor can it be pretended that woman has any wrongs to be redressed through the suffrage. If there are any such they have not been named. The law regarding the property of married women has- been so far reformed in the interests of the wife that. Instead of being unduly favorable to the husband, it seems rather inspired on the one hand by mistrust of him, and on the other by a willingness to permit him for the wife's sake to "beat" his credit ors. These facts are notorious. Cor do our courts discriminate against woman in the matter of custody of children, upon severance of the matrimonial re lation, when the fault Is not notoriously hers. On the contrary, in her favor. Woman lies under no such injustice, in any relation, as to call for suffrage for a cure. Goldwjn Smith says; "What the leaders of the woman's rights movement practically seek is, for the woman, power without responsibil ity; for the man, responsibility without power. But this Is an arrangement in which man, though he may be talked Into It for a moment, is not likely in the end to acquiesce." But the assumption that women are treated as citizens only for the pur pose of taxation is the summary of their wrongs blazoned in manifestos by the leaders of the movement. The an swer 1s that the state treats them In all respects as citizens, giving them pro tection for person, property and char acter, with every benefit which civil government can bestow, and therefore full benefit for their taxes. Government Is very practical busi ness. It is very strenuous business. For government in its final analysis is always force; and if rash measures get the community into trouble. It Is by the men that it must be got out again. In the last resort It is physical strength that rules the world, and It is 4n man, not In woman, that this last court of appeal resides. Woman Is not Inferior to man because the law does not give her the right of suffrage. Difference of duties, differ ence of spheres, the duties and spheres being equal in importance, implies no disparagement. As a rule, it is in the affections and graces that woman Is strong, and these, the affections at least, though they may be wcrth more than the practical qualities needed in politics, are not the practical qualities. Let our theorists and sentimentalists say what they will, man can never be given woman's place in the world, nor woman man's. To the line of duties that belong to man government be longs, and man's nature and character are fitted to It, while woman's is not. This is the whole business, stripped of sentlmentalism. The political wisdom of men in general, to whatever It may amount, is-formed by dally contact and collision with the world, which im presses upon them in its rough school caution, prudence, the necessity of compromise, the limitations of their will. Some of them many of them are flighty enough after all, and our country just now is in no small peril from their fllghtlness. But their gen eral tendency as a sex is to be common place and practical. Their life usually Is more or less public, while that of the woman Is and ever must be the home. Moreover, men feel as a ser a measure of responsibility In public action which women as a sex never can feel. Herein are the chief reasons why, as The Ore gonlan thinks,- woman Is as little fitted for political as man Is for domestic life. Woman suffrage, therefore, cannot be good for government and society, nor from woman herself; and womanly women see all this through their intui tions as clearly as manly men appre hend it through their Judgment and reason. A SLANDER ON" SIIERIDAN". . A "General Stephen H. Manning," who, according to a Boston dispatch to the New York Press, was "second in command of the Sixth Corps" during Sheridan's famous Shenandoah cam paign of 1S64, denies that General Sher idan at Cedar Creek, by his arrival, snatched victors' from the jaws of de feat. "General Manning" says: It Is absolutely raise. His coming: changed nothing. The truth is that when he arrived our lines had been reformed and were rapidly marching upon Early's demoralized forces. It was too good an opportunity for Sheridan to miss, and he was ready to gain Immortality br slandering a brave army and 'its noble Uen eraL All history furnishes no greater example of perfidy and Injustice. The hero of that battle, in General Manning's opinion, was General Horatio Gouvemeur "Wright, who wan in command of the Sixth Corps at Cedar Creek. "General" Manning Is published in Phlsterer's "Statistical Record of the Armies of the United States" as "Cap tain S. H. Manning, United States Vol- unteer Quartermaster, who was given, a brevet of Brigadier-General to date from March 13, 1865." It Is very clear that no volunteer Quartermaster with the rank of Captain was "second In command of the Sixth Army Corps" In Sheridan's great campaign. "Gen eral" Manning is probably a poor, .de mented veteran who has been seriously treated as a sane man by some curb stone reporter In Boston, or else he Is a military fabulist of Falstafflan quality. The history of the battle of Cedar Creek is told in the official reports of General Sheridan and his subordinates, General H. G. Wright, General George W. Getty, General George Crook, Gen eral William H. Emory, and in the re ports of his cavalry commanders, Tor bert, Merritt and Custer. The cold facts are that General Early surprised the Union Army under General H. G. Wright about 5 o'clock in the morning, rolled up the flank of the Eighth and Nineteenth Corps, and dispersed them. Then Early attacked the Third and First Divisions of the Sixth Corps, flanked them and forced them back with heavy loss. General Getty about 7 A M. came up with the Second Di vision of the Sixth Corps, and saved the army from complete ruin. At this time we had lost twenty-four guns, and all that was left of Wright's army as an organized fighting force was Getty's Division, supported on its left by the cavalry divisions of Merritt and Custer. Getty finally withdrew to a strong posl tldn west of Middletown, where he formed a new line and ordered the now reorganized First and Third Divisions of the Sixth Corps forward to this line, while General Wright exerted himself to reorganize the Nineteenth Corps on the same line. This was the situation when Sheri dan arrived, about 10 A M. The bleed ing Union Army, leaning on the shoul der and breast of Getty's Division, had finally caught its staggering feet and offered a front of what probably would have been a successful resistance to the further progress of the foe. The bat tle from this moment and Its glory are all Sheridan's. General Wright would probably have held his ground and re pulsed Early's last attack, but the gen ius of leadership was displayed in Sher idan's Instant decision to resume the offensive and wrest from Early not only the field, but all the spoils of war that he was preparing to carry away in triumph. Sheridan attacked at 3:30 P. M., and by dark Early was with out any organized army, had lost all his captured guns and twenty-four of his own. General Wright never pre tended that he expected to do more than merely hold his ground, if Sheri dan had not arrived. He never dis puted Sheridan's report in public or in private, although he outlived General Sheridan ten years, dying only last year. OUR INTERESTS IN" AFRICAN" PEACE Now that the end of the Boer War is at hand. Interest is centering on the effect of the resumption of normal and industrial trade conditions in the big country affected by this deplorable strife, which has cost so much blood and treasure. Neither time nor money can make amends for the blood that has been spilled so freely, but British enterprise will recoup all of its losses of treasure by inaugurating an era of industrial devlopment such as has never been known in the Dark Conti nent. The stubborn excluslveness of the Boers has for years interfered with the progress to which the natural re sources of the country were so Invit ing, but under a new government offer ing equal rights to all, the wpnderfui natural resources of the country will not long remain undeveloped. . While having no direct Interest in the matter, the United States will feel the effect of this awakening in many lines of trade. The "Cape to Cairo" railroad, one of the greatest undertakings ever at tempted, will most oertainly be rushed to completion as soon as possible after peace is declared. England made he roic efforts to put this road through at a time when her interests in Africa were insignificant in comparison with what they will be at the close of the Boer War, and there will be no further delays in the matter. The building of this road will give the Americans a market for a vast amount of railroad iron, ties, bridge timbers, etc, for no other country on earth Is so well equipped for filling such orders as will be placed by the British. Not only will there be an enormous demand for ma terial for building new railroad lines, new cities and towns, and opening new mines, but all of the railroad and min ing equipment destroyed by both Boers and British during the struggle now drawing to a" close will need to be re placed at once. So far as the lumber business Is con cerned, the Pacific Northwest will probably reap the greatest benefits. Lumber from Oregon, Washington and British polumbla has already been marketed in South Africa, and has a good reputation there. The business was attaining good proportions when the declaration of war put a stop to all kinds of business in the country af fected. South, Africa for the past two years has also been a good purchaser of, Oregon wheat and flour, with a con siderable amount of canned? salmon and fruit finding a, market there. This business wjll unquestionably be largely increased from now on, and in time will be quite a factor in the disposition of Oregon products. One feature of the situation however, will not be appreciated by Oregon wheatgrowers, although Its unpleasant effect will not be permanent. The pres ent high rates demanded by ships are attributed in part to the withdrawal of a large amount of steam tonnage from the regular routes of trade and placing it in the transport service. This has undoubtedly been quite a factor in .high, freights, although not so great as Is generally supposed, a revival of trade and new industrial developments all overthe world being the principal cause of high freights. The close of the war and the attendant release of a large number of steamers will not ease the strain on the freight market for many months, perhaps not for a year or two. The steamers so engaged will not even drift back Into the lines of trade from which they were diverted by the war, but Instead will find plenty of work at highly remunerative rates, carrying stores and equipments to the Industrial army which will be trekking into the Dark Continent almost before the roll of the war drums has ceased to echo. A SHATTERED IDEAL. Rev. Dr. Eliot's argument for woman suffrage is the same that was originally pleaded by Wendell. Phillips and sub sequently by George William Curtis, viz: That the gift of the suffrage would be an invaluable education for woman; that, once clothed with responsibility for the public weal or woe, through the ballot, women would be inspired to fit themselves for the discharge of that responsibility. That Is theory, but Dr. Eliot seems to ignore the fact that it is already a shattered ideal. The women of Wyo ming have had full, suffrage since 1S69, and possession of the ballot in thlrty years has "educated" the best women of that state to stay at home and has "educated" the worst women to lower rather than elevate practical politics. This is the testimony of the Secretary of State of Wyoming, published in The Oregonlan in December, 1899. If thirty years of the ballot has "educated" the best woman vote to stay out of politics and "educated" the worst woman vote to lower rather than raise the standard of practical politics, it would seem as if Dr. Eliot's "unanswerable" argument had already become a shattered ideal. The "education" of the ballot in Colo rado does not make women's Influence felt In any other way than in the du plication of their particular man's or men's ballot. If the men are for "free silver" and corrupt politics, the women when they vote at all, vote with their men. It Is human nature to do so; and it will always be human nature to do so with the average woman. Jn Utah, where women vote, the Mormon woman is as fanatical a supporter of polygamy as the Mormon man, even as the South ern woman was not only silent against slavery, which meant concubinage at her own door, which soiled her own garments and filled them with Its foul odors, but she was Just about as cruel and hard to her slaves as any Southern man of her own station. This was be cause women are just about what men make them. The Southern woman ac cepted sincerely her husband's moral code concerning slavery, with its con comitant of plantation concubinage, and barked as bitterly at the opponents of slavery as the Southern men. The fact that the women of the South In dorsed slavery as much as the men shows that it is the law of human na ture that women, as a rule, faithfully reflect their men, and in real humanity and real virtue rise Just about to the level of the average masculine senti ment that forms their environment. Dr. Eliot describes George W. Curtis as "a man of affairs." If "a man of affairs" means that he was a polished, graceful orator, a man of fine culture and literary scholarship,- an eloquent and charming writer, then Mr. Curtis 'was "a man of affairs." But these gifts do not describe "a man of affairs." He was not a man of political leader ship; he had no capacity for govern ment, or for legislation, p.oscoe Conk ling snuffed him out when he tried to contest his leadership with his stinging phrase, "the man milliner in politics." Mr. Curtis, In his youth, was one of "the Brook Farm" day dreamers; he had no fitness for the field of politics and practical statesmanship; his mind was poetic, hypercritical, rdther than practical; he had no faculty for public organization or civic administration; he was a failure as the head of the first Civil Service Commission. Had he lived in the Frenoh Revolution, he would have been one of the Girondists, a party of orators without a man of governing capacity or common sense in its ranks. He was essentially a feml-nine-mlnded man; he was about as fit to govern a great state as Wendell Phillips or John Ruskln men who start always with the premise that whatever is ideally right is at all times expedient. Such a man we should hardly call a "man of affairs," for, while Curtis tried to be "a man of affairs," the only place he was ever fit for or really suc ceeded in was in pure literature. Like all femtnine-mlnded men, he believed in woman suffrage, and feminine minded men do not shine in the world of affairs. The influence of the Oregon Humane Society, as witnessed in the attention given to the suggestions of its officers in shipping animals from this port to the Philippines, was a credit to the so ciety and to the community that stands behind and indorses its good work. That it did not extend to the shipment of animals (horses and dogs) sent to the Klondike In the wild delirium that attended the rush thither, several years ago, was due to conditions of frenzy that overpowered all suggestions of hu manity as urged in behalf of these creatures. This society is a power in the community that is always exercised Tor good, and It is no fault oil the or ganization or of its officers that its work is not as extensive as the interests of its dumb clientage demand. That the Oregon Humane Society hasjaeen able to do more effective work in look in g.after the comfort en route of cattle and horses shipped from this port than has the Washington Humane iJociety ia behalf, of the animal cargoes shipped from Seattle and Tacoma to Manila and Alaska, is witnessed in the tales of ex posure, overcrowding, suffering and death of many of the wretched brutes sent out from those ports within the past few months. The officers of the Washington Society did what they could, no doubt, to prevent the imposi tion of conditions of unnecessary hard ship upon these animals, which, as all accounts agree and as the mortality among them attests, was a disgrace to civilization The "obvious reasons" for their Inability to Improve the condi tions under which the animals were shipped lay in the fact that considera tions of humanity, whether to man or beast, were lost in the fever and ex citement of the time. It Is no reflec tion upon this society to say that it was practically powerless to prevent the wholesale cruelty to animals that has been a feature of Alaskan traffic from Puget Sound ports, since manifestly its officers were unable to prevent it. The census enumerator is not only certain of holding his office until Its term expires by limitation, but ho will be compelled to do so on penalty of fine and Imprisonment. The census di rector rules that no enumerator, after having duly accepted his appointment, can resign without laying himself lia ble to penalty. This is for the reason that they must be held to a strict re sponsibility for the performance of their work within a given time. In 1890 a total of 5000 enumerators re signed, causing the Government much annoyance and inconvenience. To avoid repetition of this embarrassment the obligation involved In the appointment is held to be mutual to the extent of providing penalties which delinquents will not care to face. The Methodist Church may continue to be officially down on dancing, card- playing, theater-going, horse-racing- and other wicked amusements, but we observe that the Epworth League keeps on in Its mad whirl of gayety, giving picnics, excursions, parlor entertain ments; playing Copenhagen, and so on. It would perhaps be unfair to suggest that the wise fathers of the church wink the other eye at the failure of the young people to follow the rigid letter of the discipline; If they do not, they should. The young people are the life of the church, and, will In time be come Its body. If the innocent pas times of other young people are to be placed under the ban, woe to the Meth odist Church. Virginia is to have a Constitutional convention, the purpose of which Is to disfranchise the negroes of the state. The vote polled upon the question was quite small; the majority for the con vention hardly exceeding 15,000. Tht most remarkable feature shown by the returns is that the majorities in favor of the convention came from the black districts. Cne district where there are few negro voters gave 5000 majority against the convention. Two other dis tricts, which have overwhelming col ored majorities, contributed something like 10,000 to the majority in favor of the convention. The causes exist in political conditions that decided the contest before the polls were opened. William Frazler has given to the Sheriff's office capable management and intelligent direction. He has systema tized the work and given prompt and efficient service to all who have busi ness with his department. All money coming- into his hands has been paid without delay to the Treasurer1 and made available for liquidation of the county's obligations. There has been no piling up of county funds at a fa vorite bank to enable the Sheriff to pocke't Interest at the public expense.. Sheriff Frazler should be re-elected to morrow as a reward for honesty and faithful performance of duty. He has earned the support of every voter and the confidence of the entire community. We shall have fewer Independent can didates in county office during the next two years. So much seems certain. Captain McDonell has made a gaining campaign, and, unless obvious signs deceive, will defeat Captain Greenleaf by a considerable majority. Nor has Mr. Brooke, for Treasurer, been tardy. He has thrown great energy Into his canvass, and has Informed the voters personally what his policy will be. It Is, first, that he will try to hold down but one job; that he will suffer no en tanglements with local banks over his bond, and that he will give his best at tention and abilities to the conduct of his office. That is enough. It doubt less means election for Brooke. Mr. Moores correctly apprehends the Issues in this county. If the Republi can1 ticket is defeated, it will be cele brated everywhere as a Fusion victory. The sympathies and the active support of every rabid sllverlte in county and state are with the so-called "Citizens" ticket. Every Republican who votes that ticket joins hands with the Silver Democrats and Silver Populists to win a victory for them. All the professed Republicans will get out of the disaster will be revenge. The substantial re sults will be exclusively for their allies. Veatch wants something again. He has always wanted something for him self and nothing for the state. Veatch is an aggravated negative, a chronic case of yes-for-me and no-for-you run to seed. During his Legislative career he opposed nearly every useful legis lative act. Now he wants to break into the Legislature again as Joint Sen ator for Lane, Josephine and Douglas Counties. The -voters should once more say no to the bilious Veatch. Montag was candidate for Mayor two years ago Pennoyers candidate. His victory would have meant a continu ance of bunco games, dancehalls, mu nicipal steals, fake fights, sure-thing traps. So he was beaten. Now he wants to be Sheriff. Tom Jordan's great concern for the taxpayer is one of the edifying features of the campaign. Tom's anxiety is bi ennial, and reaches fever point Just be fore the June election. The patient then rapidly recovers. Of course, the Nicaragua Canal bill fails. But we may expect that the statesmen who dig the canal with their Jaws during the recesses of Congress will renew their indefatigable labors. In business a goldbug, in politics a free-sllverite. Dr. Daly seems to be in himself quite a versatile pair of twins. Charles, 3. Moores jeems frto be 4a Federal "Brlgadlerof another color. 'His is tfcs trufi bluet SLINGS AND ARROWS. The census man Is on his rounds. With questions great and small, "With questions grave and questions gay. He's got to ask them all. Ho'U gaae upon your marble broiv, And ask If you are block; Tou tell him you've been out of town. He'll ask if you've- got back. Although you're clad In pantaloons. And eke & swallowtail. He'll calmly look you In the eye. And fcsk if you're a male. And when you answer all he asks. In language most polite. Ho'U- ask you. ia a searching ton If you can read and write. l And you must tell him. everything As quickly as you can. Ho has no ttmo to waste on you, for he's the census man. However there are questions which, Are clear outside his line. To give, the answers of them, you May properly decline. If he should dare to say to you "Where did you get that hat? Or. How would you like, to be the Ice man? Is it hot enough for you? "Who. struck Billy Patterson? "Wo't fell?. See? Tou needn't, stand for that. The Advice Department. A young man who works all night and who sleeps in the morning hours writes to The Oregonian to complain of an ap prentice cornetist, who abides in a hotel across the street, and who practices every morning, to the great prejudice of health ful slumber. He says the musician's in strument must he the horn of plenty, for he turns out as many notes a day as a Secretary of State during a war crisis. He wants to know If he will violate any statute Jt he kills his tormentor. We are not prepared to speak as one having au thority, but we feel rather certain that the killing of the cornetist might be fol lowed by the arrest, and perhaps by the Indictment, of his slayer. Cornets are cheap nowadays, and accordions, which are infinitely more deadly, are cheaper. With an accordion and a megaphone, the slumberer could set to work at night to square accounts, and he would probably put the horn-blower out of business In about three rounds. The experiment is worth trjing at all events. Ji, however, It fails, the victim should secure a lusty voiced deerhound and play a mouthorgan to it a few hours Just after midnight every morning. That would fetch him. Election Echoes. Sleep, candidate, sleep, It's all you can do that Is cheap. The heeler Is waiting outside for you And talking In language that's Indigo blue, Sleep, candidate, sleep. Sleep, candidate, sleep. Don't worry, the heeler will keep. That he'U stray away you need never fear. He'll wait If it takes till this time next year. Sleep, candidate, sleep. Sleep, candidate, sleep. In slumber peaceful and deep. That heeler will bleed you of all you'll pay. And skip the town on election day, Sleep, candidate, sleep. Bernhardt and Grand Opera. A correspondent, who candidly signs himself Ignorance, and who writes from a city rejoicing in the pastoral name of Hay Creek, Inquires If Sarah Bernhardt has ever been in Portland, and If she sang in grand opera while she was here. The divine Sarah has been in Portland, as many people will testify who never knew till they saw her what they missed whv t they didn't study French. But she didn't sing In grand opera. Wo didn't see the whole three acts of "La Tosca" ourselves, but we were informed by the stage carpenter that Madame Bern hardt did a buck-and-wing dance in the first act, and sang a pathetic ballad, entitled "It's Off in a Thousand Places," In the second. We have the same au thority for the assertion that In "Fedora" she gave a few refined imitations of barn yard fowls and wind instruments in the first act, and put on a taking rag-time melody, entitled "Traumerei," in the sec ond, closing the specialty bill with a very fetching cakewalk. We asked the stage carpenter If he was absolutely certain of these statements, and he assured us that he was. In her old age, Madame Bern hardt has found the study of specialty parts too taxing for her falling memory, and Is now barnstorming In her native land with an old forgottten play called "Hamlet," by one Shakespeare, an Eliza bethan dramatist who at one time was frequently Invited to drink with manag ers, and whose plays were several times really read by those magnates. It Is not likely that the lady will ever be seen in Portland again, as railroad fares and long jumps make a trip across the Ameri can continent an expensive venture. Suffered by Translation. "We had a Chaplain at our post once," said the Major, "who was a brave man and a good fellow, but who used to write such a villainous hand that Horace Greeley's manuscript would nave looked like copperplate beside It. This Chaplain did a very nervy piece of work In an In dian campaign one year, and news of It came to the ears of the Secretary of War, who used to know the Rev. Mr. Jenkins In "college. The Secretary was mightily pleased to hear that his old friend had been conducting himself like a gentleman and an officer, and so he wrote to him that if there was any particular place he wanted to be ordered to, the matter would be arranged. The Chaplain wasn't very partlcula'r,. but he had a prejudice against Fort WIngate. N. M., where he had once spent a bad year, and he wrote back to the Secretary that he was willing to stay where he was or go to any post ex cept Fort Wingate. "About a week later orders came direct ing him to start for that post, and you can imagine how he felt about it. He took it pretty hard at first, but the rest of us believed that there was some mistake and wo finally Induced him to write to Washington and see. He soon got an answer from the Secretary himself. 'My dear Jenkins,' ran the epistle, 'Fort Wingate' was the only thing I could read in that letter of yours, and, supposing that was where you wanted to go, that was where I ordered you.' If Jenkins hadn't worn the cloth he would have been obliged to stand for the drinks." Cradle Song Up to Date. Hush, my dear, lie still and slumber. Mother's on the stump tonight, Making speeches without number. For the coming suffrage fight. Hough on baby, don't you think so, Not to have lt3mother by? ' That's what made your daddy drink so; Feel bad, baby? So do L Backward, turn backward, mama, in your flight. Come to your child again. Just for tonight. Take a nlsht off from those meetings down town, And sing o'er my cradle, while I nestle down. Put on my nightgown, and wipe my wee nose. Feed me some dope to insure my repose. Over my slumbers your loving watch keep. Rock me to sleep, mother, rock me to sleep. Amateur actress I am cast for the part of a girl of 16. How long ought I to wear my dress? Franklin Footlights During the whole performance. Don't bet on election unless you've got a sure thing, which you never have. The repeater argues that what's- worth doing at all Is worth doing twlse. i A campaign lie never seems to know when the campaign is over. The Federal brigade will go up against a Balaklava tomorrow. A vote In the box Is worth two In the hand. Br1 i . How would you like to he the candi date 7 J. J. MONTAGUE. MASTERPIECES OF tlTERATURE-XVr The Death of Paul Dombey Charles Dickens. Paul had never risen from his little bed. He lay there, listening to the noises. In the. street, quite tranquilly; not car ing much how the time went, but watch ing it and watching everything about him with observing eyes. When the sunbeams struck into his room through the rustling blinds, and quivered on the opposite wall like golden water, he knew that evening- was coming on, and that the sky was red and beautiful. As the reflection died away, and a gloom; went creeping up the wall, he watched it deepen, deepen, deepen into night. Then he thought how the long streets were dotted with lamps, and how the peaceful ftars were shining overhead. His fancy had a etrange tendency to wan der to the river, which he knew was flowing through the great city; and now he thought how black It was. and how deep It would look, reflecting the hosts of stars and more than all. how steadily it rolled away to meet the sea. As It grew later In the night, and foot steps in the street became so rare that he could hear them coming-, count them es they Dassed, and lose them in the hollow distance, he would lie and watch thy many-colored rings about the candle. And: wait patiently for day. His only rroublo waa. the swift and rapid river. He felt forced, sometimes, to try to etop It to stem It with his childish hands or choke its way with sand and when he saw it coming on resistless he cried out! But a word from Florence, who was always nt hte side, restored him to himself: and loanlntr his ooor head upon her breast, he told Floy of his dream, and smiled. "When day began to dawn again, ha watched for the sun: and when its cheer ful light began to snarkle in the room, he pictured to himself pictured! he saw the high church towers rising" up Into tho morning sky, the town reviving, waking, starting into life onco morcL the river glistening as it rolled (but rolling fast as1 ever), and the country bright with dew. Familiar sounds and cries came by de grees Into the etreet below: the servants in the houre were roused and busy; faces looked in at the door, and voices asked his attendants softly how he was. Paul always answerpd for himself. T am better. I am a creat deal better, thank you! Tell papa so!" By little and little, he got tired of tho bustle of the day. the noise of carriages and carts, and peoDle passing and repass ing, and would fall asleep or be troubled with a restlep" and uneasv sense again the child could hardly tell whether this were in his sleeping or his waking mo mentsof that rushing river. ""Wby. will it never etop, Floy?" he would sometimes ak her. "It is- bearing me away. I think!" But Floy could always sootho and reassure him: and it was his daily de 1'ght to make her lay her head down on his pillow and take some rest. "You are always watching me, Floy. let me watch you. now!" They would prop him up with cushions in a corner of his bed. and there he would recline the while she lay beelde him: bending forward oftentimes to kiss her. and whispering to those who were near that she was tired, and how she had sat up so rriany nights beside him. Thw the flush of the day. In its heat and light, would gradually de cline: and again the golden water would be dancing on the wall. "And who is this? Is this my old nurse?" said the child, regarding with a radiant smile a figure coming in. Yea, yes. No other stranger would have Shed those tears at sight of him. and called him her dear boy. her pretty boy. her own poor blighted child. No other woman would have stooped down by his bed, and taken up his wasted hand and put it to her lips and breast, aa one who had some right to fondle it. No other wom an would have so forgotten everybody there but him and Floy, and been so full of tenderness and pity. "Floy, this is a kind, good face," eatd Paul. "I am glad to see it again. Don't go away, old nurse. Stay here." Hrs senses weTe all quickened, and he heard a name he knew. "Who was that, who said "Walter?" " he asked, looking round. "Some one said "Walter. Is he here? I should like to see him very much." Nobody replied directly: but his father soon said to Susan, "Call him back, then; let him come up." After a short pause of expectation, during which he looked with emiling interest and wonder on his nurse, and saw that she had not forgotten Floy, Walter was brought into the room. His open face and manner, and his cheer ful eyes, had always made him a favorite with Paul; and when Paul saw him, he stretched out his hand and said: "Good-by!" "Good-by, my child!" cried Urs. Pip chin, hurrying to hla bed's head. "Not good-by-?" For an instant, Paul looked at her with the wistful face with which he had so often gazed upon her in his corner by the Are. "Ah, yes," he said placidly, "good-by! Walter dear, good by!" turning his head to where he stood, and putting out his hand again. "Where la papa?" He felt h's father's breath up on his cheek, before the word? had parted from his lips. "Remember Walter, dear papa," he whispered, looking in his face. "Remember Walter. I was fond of Wal ter!" The feeble hand waved in the air, as if it cried "good-by!" to Walter again. "Now, 'ay me down." he said, "and Floy, come close to me. and let me eee you!" Sister and brother wound their arms around each other,- and the golden light came streaming in, and fell upon them, locked together. "How fast the river runs; between Ita green banks and the rushes, Floy! But 'tis very near the sea. I hear the waves I They always said so!" Presently he told her that the motion of. the boat upon the stream was lulling him to rest. How green the banks were now, how bright the flowers growing on them, and how tall the rushes! Now the boat was out at sea, but gliding smoothly on. And now there was a shore befora him. Who stood on the bank? He put his hands together, ae he had been used ta do at his prayers. He did not remove his arms to do it; but they saw him. fold them so, behind her neck. "Mamma Is like you, Floy! I know her by the facel But tell them that the print upon the stairs at school Is not divine enough. The light about the head is shining on me as I go!" The golden ripple on the wall came back again, and nothing else stirred in the. room. The old. old fashion! The fashion that came In with our first garments, and will last unchanged until our race haa run Its course, and the wide firmament Is rolled up like a scroll. The old, old fash ionDeath! Oh, thank God. all who see It. for that older fashion yet, of Immortality! And look upon us, angels of young children, with regards not quite estranged, when the swift river bears us to the ocean! PLEASANTRIES OF PARAGRAPHEnS In the Cafe. Carte I tell you, that waiter is a gentleman from head to foot. D'Hoto Tou mean from tip to tip. Chicago Xews. Powerful. "What a slender little thing she is." "Yes, but you'd be surprised it you wera to see some of the big men she ha3 thrown over." Philadelphia Bulletin. Grew xm Him. "Knave!" said the autocrat, "how earnest thou to be a fool?" "Sire." re sponded the jester. "I began life among ths wise men." Philadelphia North 'American. "Do you think there w III be much Interest In this political enterprise'" "Interest!" repeated Senator Sorghum. "It'll be -nore than Inter est. It'll be di idends." Washington Star. A Chicago Explanation. Ella I hope mr minister won't, see me out riding In this auto mobile this Sunday morning. Stella Why do you call him jour minister? Do you attend his church? Ella No; but he always marries me. Judge. Conclusive. We had our misgivings. "What evidence have you." we asked, in all candor, "that these savages are sincere in their pro fession of faith?" "They have already sent up one overture for a revision of the creed, and have another ia preparation!" replied the mis sionary, with a pardonable air of triumph. Of course, our doubta were at ones silenced. De troit Jgurnal, fax V