May 23, 1990 The Portland Observer Page 3
N ews A round T own
Are You Ready For Commitment In Your Life?
T h is W eek in H istory
by Ullysses Tucker, Jr.
There comes a time, hopefully, where
a human being desires or w ants com
m itment from another in their life.
W hen you reflect on it for a moment,
most individuals fall in love with som e
one that they do not know very well.
Although we may not find out all that
we desire to know about the individual
we fall in love with, there are some
fundamental issues that need to be
addressed or discussed before making a
com m itm ent to another person. " I f I
had only known beforehand about him /
her, I w ouldn’t have gotten in v o lv e d ..
.” Do you rem em ber those famous last
words?
First of all, what does com m itm ent
mean to you? All human beings seem
to have conflicting perspectives or ex
pectations regarding com m itm ent
whether it is to be single, married, free,
or committed, it is an individual choice
or lifestyle statement. You can not
make another person want a com m it
ment just because you w ant one. You
must be on the same page. Com m it
ment may not necessarily be for every
one despite the fact that it seem s like
most humans are constantly in search
for Mr. or Mrs. Right ( another illu
sion).
Commitment, or lack o f it, inspires
great fear in most people, Some ex
perts say that this fear is valid and
rational. Obviously, marriage com m it
ments can be used to repress people,
and to restrict freedom, growth and
self-expression. Some assert that m o
nogamy is monotony nad contrary to
human behavior. Commitment, at worst,
means that an individual gives up what
is important to them in an effort to keep
another person in their life or around.
The fear of com m itm ent in relation
ships can be directly related to making
Tiring of the Fight for Equality?
Do you ever ju st get tired o f co n
stantly fighting for equality?
Does it ever seem like, “ if I could
just live a day to my full potential,
without the hands o f society pushing
me down, its eyes looking on me with
contem pt” ? A day o ff would be nice.
Remind yourself that every day, in
every small way that you fight inequal
ity, brings us all one day and one step
closer to perm anent “ days off* .
W e have to change the world one
person at a time.
W e’ve got a lot o f racism and repres
sion to fight off...but you aren’t alone in
the battle. Every day a M artin L uther is
born. It might be you. W e’re fighting
together.
S o hold your head high... we ’ ve got a
long way to go, yet w e’ve com e a long
way.
Here are some minority struggles for
May 23-29.
M ay 2 7 ,1956-The Louisiana House of
Representatives votes unanimously that
the Supreme C ourt’s public school seg
regation law is unconstitutional.
Sam e day-T he Tallahassee bus boy
cott--which lasted until March o f 1958—
begins.
M ay 25, 1964-The Supreme Court
ordered Virginia’s Prince Edward County
to re-open and integrate its public schools.
In 1951, controversy began, regarding
whether or not the Prince Edward County
schools should be segregated. In 1959,
the county refused to fund the schools,
and the schools were shut down.
In 1959, a foundation, funded by
state and county grants, set up private
schools for white children. In fact, 25%
o f the local taxes w ent to these tem po
rarily legal, discrim inatory, state-en
couraged schools. A proposal for sim i
larly-funded Black schools was rejected.
It took years for action against this:
in 1961, the U.S. District C ourt blocked
governm ental funding for such schools.
Still, African Am erican children had no
funding for schooling until enough pri
vate contributions provided them with
schooling in 1963.
M ay 26, 1964-The Oregonian runs a
series o f articles on the plight o f the
Am erican Indian in O regon schools.
Staff w riter Blaine Schulz reported that
Indian children are generally one year
behind in schooling, due m ostly to the
bi-lingual barrier they confront when
entering school, as well as repressed
interest in education due to poverty
living conditions (resulting in more
parental em phasis on the home status,
as well as difficulty in transportation,
and parents’ need for the child to help
out at home).
However, in the Umatilla Reserva
tion near Pendleton, em phasis is on
education, and Indian students excel
beyond w hite students.
M ay 2 3 , 1966-Julian Bond, a 26-year-
old African A merican who had already
been twice turned down to represent the
136th district in Atlanta, is voted down
21-0. Bond vowed to continue his
fight.
Officials claim Bond was denied be
cause o f his view that he adm ires the
courage o f anyone who would bum a
m ilitary draft card.
“ I believe in acting within the dic
tates of my conscience,” stated Bond.
“ There are some things I’m prepared to
do that I don’t require o f others. If I
break a law I am willing to suffer the
consequences.”
Sam e day-H ubert Humphrey, in a val
iant plea for the civil rights movem ent,
makes a speech endorsing his opinion.
“ Laws, how ever skillfully drafted
and im plem ented, constitute only the
beginning o f the process of construct
ing a total environm ent o f freedom and
equality...they cannot wipe aw ay cen
turies o f oppression and injustice, how
ever much we m ight desire i t
“ O ur task now is to m ove beyond
equality in law to equality in fact.”
* * * * *
1 also w anted to include a quote from
Jam es Baldwin from “ A D ialogue”
with Nikki Giovanni:
"You know, it’s not the world that
was my oppressor, because what the
world does to you, i f the world does it to
you long enough and effectively enough,
you begin to do to yourself. You be
come a collaborator, an accomplice o f
your own murderers, because you be
lieve the same things they do. They
think it's important to be white and you
think it's important to be white; they
think it's a shame to be black and you
think it's a shame to be black."
a mistake or selecting the wrong per
son. People are afraid to fail, be it in re
lationships, life, or in their career. At
best, making a com m itm ent can build
trust and make a relationship far more
focused.
Any relationship is only as good or
strong as the com m itm ent tw o people
make. Some people lose site of com
m itment during m oments o f despair,
doubt, times o f confusion, and pain.
Commitments are made to endure the
good and bad times. Com m itm ent is
consciously offering another human a
special place in your life and hearL A
com m itm ent is your word or set of
guidelines you (collectively) establish
in the relationship-elem ents like hon
esty, sexual fidelity, and the w illing
ness to be supportive emotionally/psy-
chologically. C om m itm ent is not like
some fly-by-night attitude, it has to be
practiced and lived everyday.
Com m itm ent can be a very tough
topic to talk about because o f people’s
fear o f abandonm ent and entrapment.
Com m itm ent w ill not put an end to
those doubts/fears and neither will it
put an end to your attraction to other
human beings. However, commitment
in a relationship can create a sense of
security and intimacy lacking in casual
encounters. Even though there are many
positive elem ents in making a com m it
ment, there is nothing abnormal about a
person if freedom supercedes com m it
ment.
So, does it mean that you will live
happily ever after just because you de
c k e d to make a com m itm ent? No. A c
tually, that’s when all the hard work
and hopefully the growth begins.
Anything worth having is worth w ork
ing for. Lastly, many o f the troubles
and tension that evolve in relationships
usually are a result o f unresolved em o
tional or psychological issues. Som e
times, how we were raised by our fam i
lies can affect attitudes and perception
about how relationships are or are not.
In my opinion, having a serious or
com m itted relationship can only work
if two people have their priorities in o r
der. Everything else, including your
friends and family, should com e after
wards. Some may argue, but if you are
not willing to put your mate before your
work and family, you are asking for
trouble and conflict. At tim es, families
can be your w orst enemy and cause
problem s in a relationship. W hat was
good for your parents o r other family
mem bers may not be good for you and
your mate. You can pick your friends
or m ate, but you can ’t pick your rela
tives . . .
Love is not bestowed upon us with a
magic wand or from C upid’s arrow . A
loving relationship is a m atter o f co n
scious in te n t It is im possible to make
som eone love you. Your com m itm ent
to your relationship or w illingneess to
have it serve both o f you is not a one
time event. Com m itm ent happens one
day at a time. For this reason alone,
com m itm ent is better offered than
demanded.
C ommunity C alendar
Starting Your Business
“ Starting Your Business” will
be presented W ednesday, May 23,
from 8:30-noon at the Newberg Cham
ber o f Commerce. In this workshop,
topics include ownership skills, fi
nancing, accounting and m arketing-
essentials of going into business.
C ost is $7.50 for Cham ber m em
bers and $10 for non-members. To
register and for information, call Small
Business Development Center at 273-
2828.
V ernon C om m . M eeting
The Vernon Community Asso
ciation is sponsoring a neighborhood
meeting on Thursday, May 24 from
7XX) to 9:00 pm . in the Vernon School
Auditorium, 2044 N £ . Killingsworth
S l Vemon residents who w ant to
know what can be done about drugs,
gangs and violence, to make Vernon
a safe and cleaner neighborhood
should attend this meeting.
Speakers include: Art Richardson,
Outreach W orker, Youth Gang Proj
ect; Jess McKinley, Crime Preven-
tion Specialist, N ortheast Coalition of
Neighborhoods; Mardell Taylor, U r
ban League o f Portland; Jennie Portis,
Livability Coordinator, Northeast C oa
lition of Neighborhoods; Rev. B.E.
Johnson, New Hope Community Church
of God in Christ, Paul Brown, Sport
Quickness Camp.
For more information, call 248-4575.
People Are Beautiful Summer
Camp
Children and youth between the ages
of 4 and 13, living in N/NE Portland arc
encouraged to “ celebrate friendship”
with self, family, friends, community
and the world during six weeks this
summer, June 25-A ugust 2 at the M al
lory Avenue Christian Church, 126 NE
A lberta S l
Fee is $30.00 per child, scholarsh ips
are availalbe but lim ited—fee due at
registration, which begins M a y 7 ,1990.
First come, first served. For more in
formation call Rev. Denise Bell, 288-
5173.
Reggae Sunsplash Show M oved
Reggae Sunsplash ’90 concert, origi
nally scheduled at the Masonic Temple,
has been moved to the Schnitzer
Concert Hall, Portland. The show
tim e has also been changed from 8:00
to 7:30. Tickets are $17.50 (not in
cluding service charge). Tickets avail
able at all Fred M eyer FASTIXX
outlets, Everybody’s Ticket Centers,
the Coliseum and Portland Center for
the Performing Arts box office. Fore
more ticket information, call 224-
TIXX.
Accoustical Guitar Concert
G uitarist Dan Perz with Clipper
Anderson on bass will be performing an
all acoustic concert o f original music,
Celebrity Centre Portland, 709 SW
Salm on, 8-9 p.m. on M onday, May 23.
For further inform ation, contact Dan
Perz at 643-5190.
Consum er Awareness Event
Offered
Saturday, June 2 Portland V egetari
ans and People for Animal Rights, in
cooperation with the Cruelty-Free Life
style Newsletter, arc presenting the “ We
C are” C onsum er Fair, 3:30 to 6:30
p.m. at the Old Church, 1422 SW 11th
dow ntow n Portland.
Caring consum ers can sample and
purchase products w hicha re non-toxic,
biodegradable and not cruelly tested on
anim als. Cosm etics, hair and skin care
items, household cleaners and pet care
products will be displayed. Speakers
will present information all day, plus
free beauty “ m ake-overs” and door
prizes. Admission is free.
Shriners of Oregon Gala Day
The Prince Hall Shriners o f O re
gon, Mina Temple #68 will host the
Region VII Joint G ala Day Confer
ence, May 24027, Red Lion Inn, C o
lum bia River.
The public is invited to attend the
parade and the events:
Public Program, Speaker Charles Jor
dan; Talent Pageant a Disco; the Parade
and the Gala Day Ball.
________________ >
V______ .___________
Menswear Retailer
Donates Old Suits
To Homeless
The rising number of homeless people
in A m erica and the Northwest is a fact
that m ost of us encounter everyday. A
local retailer is working to help hom e
less men in a unique way.
Sizes Unlim ited, a Pordand-based
seller o f big and tall m enswear, is en
couraging its custom ers to bring in their
old, dry-cleaned suits for a $20 in-store
credit on the purchase o f a new suit or
sportcoat. The suits are then donated to
Baloney Joe’s, which provides the suits
to hom eless men. These men arc then
better prepared for job interviews, which
can lead to employm ent.
“ This is one way that Sizes U nlim
ited can help others in need,” Sizes U n
lim ited's Jim G reenblatt said. “ As a
part o f the business com m unity, wc can
help in several ways, but we chose this
route because it gets more people in
volved. People who otherwise would
not know how to help now have an easy
painles way to assist someone in need,’ ’
G reenblatt said.
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VOA Seeks Volunteers
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Volunteers o f America O regon, Inc.
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Volunteers may use the agency’s
vans or drive their own vehicles. Inter
ested persons should be available be
tween 8 am and 5 pm weekdays for one
or more days per month. Full days are
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In addition, each volunteer must have
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driving record, and concern for senior
citizens.
VOA will train volunteers and pro
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age reim bursem ent for those using their
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