Morning Oregonian. (Portland, Or.) 1861-1937, August 28, 1913, Page 8, Image 8

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THE MORNING OREGONIAN, THURSDAY, AUGUST 23, 1913.
PORTLAND, OBBQOK.
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POKTLAXD, THURSDAY, A 1 11. M. Ml.
PRESIDENT WIIAON'S aCESSAOE.
President Wilson's address on Mex
ico is in many respects a remarkable
document. As voicing the attitude of
the American people towards our battle-torn
neighbor. It Is of unerring; ac
curacy in so far as the desire for peace
and tranquillity Is Emphasized. With
President Wilson the American people
are earnest in their desire for an early
and peaceful settlementeof Mexico's in
ternal differences. The American peo
ple would avoid intervention or war
with Mexico as they would avoid pesti
lence or plague.
But as applying; a remedy to an ex
isting and deep-rooted evil, how far
does President Wilson's policy go? As
strengthening the slender bonds of
friendship, will It prove a positive or
negative agency? Does it consist of ir
refutable loglo when contrasted with
the Mexican reply? .
President Wilson bases his argu
ments on the assumption that Huerta's
government Is not constitutional or
lawful. The Mexican reply asserts
that the matter of constitutionality is
not to be passed upon arbitrarily. Pres
ident Wilson takes the view that by
non-recognition of Huerta's govern
ment may we best show our friend
ship and honest desire to help Mexico.
The reply is that by recognition of the
da facto government only might we
prove our sincere and disinterested
friendship.
The difference between President
Wilson's message and the Gamboa re
ply is one of viewpoint Obviously
President Wilson has Imposed an
American viewpoint upon a Mexican
situation, and Mexican temperament.
Impartially viewed, it is not more log
ical than the Mexican note, and while
the message may have a sobering. ef
fect on the belligerent factions, yet it
fails to offer any adequate solution of
the problem.
Since we are to recognize no govern
ment that we regard as unconstitu
tional, what is going to happen in the
interval? Should Huerta place Gen
eral Trevino In the Presidential chair
while he takes the field against the
rebels, there still remains the Huerta
refusal to bind himself to elimination
of his candidacy. Inasmuch as Huerta,
lacking recognition, cannot secure the
funds with which to prosecute a vig
orous campaign, there Is little likeli
hood that he will subdue the country.
If he does not and the rebel elements
fail to develop strength, then a dead
lock must ensue until bankruptcy of
the present government brings mutiny
to an already restless federal army.
What then but'another coup d'etat?
Or. barring that, actual anarchy and
chaos?
As to the matter of withdrawing all
Americans, that is not practicable.
Thousands will refuse to abandon
homes and Interests which they have
devoted years to acquiring. How will
we give them 'protection except by in
terposition of armed force? President
Wilson does not hint at that stern
measure, but he insists that the wel
fare of Americans will be rigorously
looked after. Does he Intend keeping
a record of outrages and taking up the
prosecution of offenders when the or
derly processes of constitutional gov
ernment have eventually been In
stalled? It is given to no man to foresee ac
curately what will now happen in Mex
ico. The feeling must persist that up
to this point Mexico Is the worse for
our meddling. Nor does President Wil
son's message clarify the international
atmosphere. To be sure, had the me
diation plan Included an expressed al
ternative of drastic action, then our
course would be clear and a stern set
tlement of the Mexican problem might
be at hand. But the only pressure
we -brought to bear was that barring
acceptance of the Administration views
and ideas, the United States would
leave Mexico severely alone. Had the
American attitude been more exacting,
more uncompromising, results might
have been expected. Why should
Huerta greatly fear our leaving him
alone since we would not recognize
him?
Nor can there be any certainty that
the President's message puts us in a
better light before the world. For
while we have made it clear that the
United States has no ulterior motives,
yet in the event of final intervention
may mo not be accused of having blun
dered our way into the mess? If an
archy and chaos follow Huerta's pos
sible bankruptcy and downfall. It may
be held that we could have avoided
that calamity by lending moral sup
port to the organized. If irregular, gov
ernment headed by General Huerta.
If the Mexican situation Is any
nearer a solution than before, it Is be
cause President Wilson's message will
bring to an earlier Issue the existing
difficulties rather than because of any
way out of the trouble provided by the
message itself.
In claiming as a victory the amend
ment of the currency bill which per
mits Federal reserve banks to dis
count agricultural as well as commer
cial paper, the McHenry faction of
Democrats again shows its ignorance
of sound finance. Their original prop
osition was to base Issues of Treasury
notes on warehouse receipts for farm
produce at certain maximum valua
tions. This would have based cur
rency on inactive stocks of perish
able commodities and would have stim
ulated speculation in "food products.
Instead, the caucus has approved ac
ceptance by bankers of such agricul
tural security as commends It to bank
ers. Loans will be regulated by the
value and marketable quality of the
commodity at the time the loans are
made. Naturally, stored farm pro
duce has a loan value, but much low
er than that which has entered Into
consumption through sale. The only
change in the bill is that this loan
value is specifically recognized as Jus
tifying rediscount of notes based on
such security. The bill has been
strengthened and a point has been
gained for the farmers without depart
ure from the sound principles of
finance.
WHY SHOULD WHITMAN DECLINE?
District Attorney Whitman is in the
unique position of having been nomi
nated for re-election by all parties In
New Tork City. That is the reward
of the able, unswerving fight he has
made against graft in the police de
partment. Tammany, which has been
held responsible for graft, disowns the
grafters and ranges itself on the side
of their prosecutor by nominating Mr.
Whitman after he has already re
ceived and accepted the nominations
of Republicans, Progressives, Inde
pendence League and Independent
Democrats.
Tet Seth Low. a leader in the fusion
of the last-named parties, tells Mr.
Whitman hev should not accept the
Tammany nomination, that he "may
keep the anti-Tammany Issue clear
and unmistakable."
On what ground he should do so is
difficult to conceive. He was nomi
nated primarily as a Republican and
as such will enter the campaign. He
was nominated on his record, and on
that he will stand. His Indorsement
by the other fusion parties Is due to
that record and to the belief that he
will add to it. The Tammany -nomination,
coming after all the others jyod
after he is committed to the. course
advocated by the fusionists, cannot be
regarded otherwise than as an indorse,
ment of his past acts aryl a pledge of
support in his announced future
course. Mr. Whitman can consistently
accept the unasked nomination of
Tammany without Implied or express
obligation to turn aside from the path
he has marked out. He will be free to
prosecute Tammany, should occasion
require. Tammany has simply coin
cided with the practically unanimous
wish of the community.
By accepting the Tammany nomina
tion, which is really a simple Indorse
ment of a nomination already made by
the Republicans and other parties, Mr.
Whitman would not impair his stand
ing as a Republican. He would not
thereby becoirte a Tammany Demo
crat, any more than he became a Pro
gressive, an Independence Leaguer or
an Independent Democrat by accept
ing the nominations of the several
other parties. By nominating him
Tammany has joined all other parties
in lifting his office above party and
making It non-partisan. Surely this Is'
a most desirable consummation.
Mr. Low desires Mr. Whitman's elec
tion. The latter might well reply to
him that the Tammany nomination
insures his election, while Mr. Whit
man's declination and Tammany's
nomination of another candidate would
place his election in doubt and might
conceivably cause his defeat.
The attitude of Mr. Low Is typical
of the impractical, altruistic reformer.
who is so careful about the means that
he seldom attains the end. Such men
as he hare filled the political bone
yard with the wrecks of highly prom
ising reform movements.
FASTING ANT STAB. VINO.
Hereward Carrington is known to
Europe and America as the champion
of risky causes. It was he who came
to the front when the lamented Eu
sapia Palladlno stood in danger of
losing her hard-earned reputation for
miracles and nobly proved that all the
scientists In the United States were
wrong. He only iwas right, he and
Eusapia.
But with all his proclivity for get
ting on the shady side. Mr. Carrington
has at last taken up a cause that will
bear defending. It Is that of hygienic
fasting. He makes a clear distinction
between fasting and starvation. Starva
tion begins, says Mr. Carrington, when
the body craves food and can not get
any. Fasting means the withholding
of food as long as the body does not
demand it. The distinction is rational
and requires no great medics knowl
edge to be understood. When a per
son begins to fast there is a short time
when he suffers acutely, not from hun
ger, but from the breakup of old bod
ily habits. This miserable feeling
presently passes away and. If one's
health really demands abstinence, a pe
riod ensues during which there is no
appetite for food. While this period
lasts one can go about his busi
ness and pleasure with undimin
ished energy and in the meantime the
organs rest, the waste matter that has
been accumulating through indulgent
years Is eliminated and health is es
tablished on a firm basis. Then, and
not till then, the craving for food
returns. Such a fast may last for one
day or forty, but until it ends the
physical frame steadily recuperates.
Starvation, on the other hand, weak
ens its victim from 'the outset. This
difference is so obvious that it seems
as if every person ought to be able to
fast when ha needs and never starve
himself. But our judgment is fallible,
especially when It is applied to our
own health. We cannot rely upon it
safely.' There is an ever-present peril
that a person who fancies he Is only
fasting may actually be committing
suicide. Such cases have occurred too
frequently to be passed over. In this,
as in most other healing experiments,
it is safest to begin by consulting a
reputable physician.
EMANCIPATION OF THE WEST.
Purchase of the United Railways of
San Francisco by the Flelschhacker
syndicate means more than the trans
fer of stock from the hands of one set
of men to those of another set, It is
an example of the West buying back
Its property from the East with Its
own accumulated wealth. As the great
railroads, which were built with Eng
lish and German money, have gradu
ally passed Into American hands, so
are the great enterprises of the West,
which were constructed with Eastern
money, passing into Western hands
Twenty years ago the farmers of the
nrairie states were working on capi
all furnished on mortgage by the
East. Thousands of them lost their
farms in the panic and depression of
1893 to 1897. They have since bought
back their farms and now have money
to lend to others.
As years pass the financial emanci
pation of the West will go on and be
come complete. Demand for capital
for development of mines, power. Irri
gation' enterprises, railroads and trol
ley lines will grow less as opportuni
ties for such investments are taken
up, and the home supply of capital
will Increase as these enterprises en
rich the communities in which they
are carried on. Finally the West will
have surplus capital to Invest In other
fields and a generation or two hence
we may see the East coming West,
Instead of the West going East, for
capital.
As th United States as a whole
profited by the application of the ac
cumulated experience of centuries to
a virgin field, until this country has
so greatly excelled Europe in wealth
and rapidity of development as to as
tonish the world, so will the West far
more excel the East. The forests,
water-power, coal, oil and soil fertility
of the East have been squandered or
have passed into private hands which
levy a perpetual tribute on the people.
The West has stopped short In imi
tating this prodigal career. It is con
serving its forests to become a perpet
ual source of supply and to maintain
and regulate the flow of Its streams.
Under the wise direction of a Western
head of the Interior Department, a
premium Is put on the maximum use
and minimum cost of electric power
from our streams. Modern engineer
ing science is making our deserts
sources of fertility far surpassing the
richest land of the East. Ere long
we shall have laws under which coal,
oil, gas and phosphate must be pro
duced on terms ensuring reasonable
prices to the consumer. Scientific ag
riculture will preserve the fertility of
the soil, which has been wasted In
states further east.' We shall profit
by the mistakes of the East until the
people of that region "Will coma to
learn of us and to borrow both money
and skill from us.
STRIKE PREVENTIVE 18 FOUND.
How effective In settling the great
majority of labor disputes is an Im
partial inquiry by Judicial-minded
men, who endeavor to bring about
agreement and, in case of failure, make
an unbiased statement of the trouble
and of the best means of preventing
a strike, is shown by the success of
the Canadian trades disputes act. That
act requires workmen who contem
plate a strike or employers who con
template a lockout to notify the Mln.
ister of Labor that, unless a board of
mediation is appointed, a strike or
lockout iwlll result. The Minister of
Labor then calls on each party to name
a member of the board and these two
name a third. If either party falls to
name its man, the Minister names one
to represent it. If the two cannot
agree on a third, the Minister appoints
him.
The board may oompel production
of documents, may subpena witnesses
and may take evidence under oath, but
has no power to order acceptance of
its conclusions. If It effects a settle
ment, it simply reports the fact to the
government. If it fails to do so, It
publishes broadcast Its report, with Its
opinion of what should be done to pre
vent a strike or lockout. Mediation
is tried first. If that fall, no pressure
Is brought upon either party, except
that of public opinion based on the
board's findings. There Is no provision
tor arbitration, compulsory or other
wise. But the mere Interposition of
cool, conciliatory, disinterested persons
who have the confidence of the parties
to the dispute, smooths over differ
ences, calms passion and restores rea
son and justice, so that in the great
majority of cases the dispute is ami
cably adjusted.
During the six years of the law's
operation ending March 31, 1918, there
were 145 applications for boards,
which prevented or ended strikes In
all except eighteen cases. Whenever
men have struck in ignorance of the
law, the differences have been settled
under it almost immediately after its
provisions became known.
The provisions for mediation con.
talned in the Newlands law follow the
lines of the Canadian law, but the for.
mer also contains provision for agree
ments to arbitrate. Such agreements
become binding contracts. Our law
applies only to interstate railroads, but
may easily be amended to apply to all
labor disputes. Canada may prove to
have supplied us with the means of
almost entirely preventing strikes,
which are the most wasteful means
of settling simple questions of busi
ness between employer and workman.
COUNTRY CHURCHES.
Public discussion refuses to drop
the discouraging subject of the coun
try church. The important facts of the
situation have been made familiar to
all readers by the numerous articles
which have been published concerning
It, and there is little difference of
opinion about what ought to be done to
make matters better. Everett T. Tom.
linson hardly gives any new informa
tion in his World's Work article, but
he reiterates the well-known facts
with emphasis and soul-searching
force. Some of the statistics he quotes
will bear repetition.
For example, the worst paid minis
ters in the United States are those of
the Southern Baptists. They receive
but $334 a year. Next to them come
the Disciples with 1526. To the latter
facts we shall return in a moment. But
It Is worth while to notice first that
the best paid Protestant ministers are
those of the Unitarian, Episcopal and
Universalist Churches. The average
Unitarian salary is 81221; that of the
Universalist pastor 1983. The Episco
pal clergyman receives, upon the aver
age, 8994. These facts are significant.
The comparatively large salaries paid
the Episcopal ministers may be ex
plained by the high level of Intelligence
and comfort among the members of
that church. Their social pride is ex
emplary and they refuse to permit
their clergy to live In disgraceful pov.
erty. They know what is becoming to
the profession and they make a com
mendable effort to live "up to their
ideals.
With the Unitarians and Universal
lets another reason for liberal salaries
must be taken into account. These
denominations are, in a sense, perse
cuted. They are not usually admitted
to full fellowship with the churches
called "evangelical," and their mem
bers cherish a feeling of Injustice. This
moves them to uncommon zeal. As a
rule, they are among the most intelli
gent citizens of their communities.
They are great readers and their devo
tion to their pastors Is fired by confi
dence that they are nearer to the gen-'
uine practices of primitive Christianity
than their neighbors, who try to out
law them. It must be remembered
that these observations apply only to
rural churches. Of course, such relics
of barbarism have long since disap
peared from the cities. Both seal and
Intellectual pride contribute to make
the Unitarians and Unlversalists lib
eral to their ministers, and the result
is apparent In the exceptional quality
of the sermons they are privileged to
hear. An Illiterate Unitarian or Uni
versalist preacher is almost unheard
of. Would that the same might be said
of all the denominations.
Turning now to the low salaries
which the Southern Baptists and the
Disciples pay, we find not much diffi
culty in accounting for them. Both
these denominations are still inspired
by a primitive missionary seal. Praise
worthy though this may be, it Is not
always as wise as the serpent. It
moves them to rush in where angels
would hesitate to tread. Inspired, of
course, solely by the desire to save
souls, they found churches with, a cer
tain recklessness of consequences in
little villages which are already over
churched.. If their members were ob
tained by converting sinners no seri
ous objections could be raised. But
that seldom happens. A few brands
are plucked from the burning, to be
sure, but the majority of their adher
ents are drawn from churches already
established. Occasionally in the excite
ment of proselytism an old congrega
tion la broken up. Some of the frag
ments flock to the new preacher.
Some of them wander away and are
lost.
The novelty of the sacred invasion
naturally attracts the villagers, whose
lives are usually as dull as a frogpond.
The minister emphasizes sensationally
some' rite of the church, commonly
baptism, which may be made more
spectacular than any other ceremony
of the Protestant denominations. There
Is ground for exciting wrangles over
sprinkling and Immersion. The peo
ple who consent to be Immersed be
come for the moment the central fig
ures In a little melodrama, and of
course they feel their importance.
Fame is as dear to the rural heart as
to the poet in his Grub-street garret.
Modern proselytizers have fortified
their drawing power by a good many
theatrical arts like moving pictures,
ragtime songs and deft advertising.
When the little flurry which they ex
cite is over, the wretched village which
they have visited has one more dying
church than it had previously and the
adversary resumes his reflections on
the folly of mankind.
Congregations built up in this way
are necessarily weak financially. The
roving spirit which the members ex
hibit in their religion pervades their
business also, and they suffer the fate
of the rolling stone. Hence they
could not pay their preacher a com
fortable salary If they wished, and
usually they do not wish It In their
opinion. If he has enough to keep him
from starvation and rags, he ought to
be satisfied. And either because of his
Christian devotion or for some other
reason it must be said for him that he
almost always is satisfied. He proba
bly feels that his pay measures well
up to his ability, like the old Slwasb
divine who got 810 a year. "That Is
poor pay," observed a sympathetic
traveler. ".Me poor preacher," replied
the stoical Indian.
The spirit of modern Christianity
percolates but slowly into the rural
sections. The ordinary country church
goer still hopes to be saved by belief
In traditional dogmas. He Is Inclined
to argue over fine points of theology
to the neglect of character and daily
conduct. He has not yet learned the
magic secret that Christianity is a life
Instead of a set of mathematical the
orems. What the country churches need
above everything else Is a series of
institutes for their ministers like those
which have been provided for school
teachers. In these brief schools com
petent Instructors would Impart to
them the meaning of the religion they
profess, a subject of which many are
totally Ignorant. Methods of dealing
with rural church problems would be
taught. As matters stand, the ordi
nary village minister only vaguely
knows, very often, that there are such
problems. The stress of Christian ef
fort could thus- be diverted from arid
abstractions to the vital concerns of
life and the country church might
gradually reconquer its rightful place
in the community.
No man reads the signs of the times
more aptly than the Emperor of Ger
many. In his ripe maturity he has be
come a teetotaler because he appre
hends the .evils that strong drink has
wrought upon the German people.
They are too bibulous to be completely
efficient. William foresees the strug
gles they must go through and neglects
no means of assuring victory.
Alexander Sullivan, who died recent
ly in Chicago, was one of the last of
those Irish-Americans who proposed
physical force as a means of securing
home rule for Ireland. ,He prevented
adoption of a dynamiters' platform at
a convention In this country in 1883
and lived to see the Irish cause on the
point of triumph by constitutional
means and to see its enemies in Ulster
threatening rebellion.
Enlightened opinion will commend
President Foster's courageous address
on social hygiene at the Buffalo Con
gress. His position Is that safety lies
tn light. The obscurantists And almost
their last stronghold In the beclouded
and falsified realm of sex relations,
but even here truth iwlll be. too strong
for them. There is no salvation in
mendacity.
What chance will members of the
Municipal Civil Service Commission
have of elevation to any elective office
if they insist that women employes of
the city tell their ages? . The de
luded men must be utterly indifferent
to their political future.
Bob Morgan, sentenced to die next
month for murdering a young girl at
Condon, says he was actuated by
"crazy Jealousy." That is a bad dis
ease that needs checking by precept
and example.
Lawyer Hitchings, convicted of being
a "peeping Tom," says he was merely
out nights for his rheumatism. That
rockpile sentence ought to cure it,
then.
A man and woman who marry after
a quarrel that separated them- for
forty years, during which both mar
ried, will hardly have time for another
tiff.
When the Big Four passes a quar
terly dividend, it means loss to stock
holders only. Expenses, which Include
big salaries, pass as usual.
That little Salem girl who ran away
because she hated to carry In wood Is
excusable. She Is too young to con
t em plat matrimony.
Why this objection to hiding of their
ages by women employes of the city?
Isn't that one of woman's recognized
prerogatives?
Seattle need not be troubled by
moth-infested potatoes from Califor
nia. Send to Oregon for the best that
grows.
After having been separated forty
years, a Douglas County couple mar
ried. Just ' couldn't hold out any
longer.
Whitman is being urged not to ac
cept the Tammany indorsement. But
perhaps he wants to be elected.
Let the fans make medicine to put
the pennant winners above .800.
Thaw may yet be glad to get back to
Matteawan.
HOW KENNEWICK GOT ITS HAM IS.
With Maay Other Name It Was Tikn
Frosn Indian Tesgve,
CORNELIUS. Or, Aug. 16. (To the
Editor.) I always read with much In
terest the articles of Mr. Addison Ben
nett on his trips about the country
showing the growth of communities
where 25 years ago barren plains or
sagebrush gave little promise ot fature
occupancy for man. I was considerably
amused in one of his recent articles at
bis attempt to trace the same ot
"Kennewlck."
As I am to blame for the name I
think it not amiss through The Ore
gonian to give some of the circum
stances which led to the name and lo
cation of the place.
In the Summer of 1888 I was sent
out by the Northern Pacific Railroad
Company to make a survey of the Co
lumbia River near to and above Its
confluence with the Snake and to de
termine the most feasible crossing for
the branch that was t be constructed
to Fuget Sound, the Yakima Valley be
ing axed as the route.
Accordingly, with a party of engin
eers, I sometime arrived at Alnsworth,
which was then the largest place in
those parts and which I am glad to
say has since passed away with other
things vile, useless and unlovely. The
next day, having chartered a steam
boat for , our party, we passed down
the Snake to the Columbia and pro
ceeded up stream for about four miles
to where from the deck of the steamer
I directed the captain to land us in a
cove at the foot of what was an island
In flood season, where waa perhaps
half an acre of coarse grass, the only
green visible as far as the naked ey
could reach, saving the bluelsh green
of the inviting water. There we
camped and proceeded to carefully sur
vey and sound the river channel from
White Bluffs to the mouth of the
Snake.
A short distance below our camp we
found a ledge of rock and boulder ex
tending across the river bottom shal
lowing the channel and making excel
lent foundation. The Snake River
bridge though but little over 1700 feet
In length cost the railroad company
$1,225,000, the Columbia Klver bridge
a little over 2600 feet In length cost
only one-quarter of this amount, due
mostly to foundations.
That Fall 25 miles of the Cascade
branch was graded and track laid. In
the Spring following. 1884, I located
the bridge and extended the bridge
tangent to an Intersection with the
main line. Hence Pasco. Mr. V. G.
Bogus brought the name from South
America, as is generally known. It
then became necessary to find a name
for the crossing ot the Columbia.
The grassy slope where I first land
ed had long been used by the Indians
aa a camp ground on '.heir fishing trips
up and down the rlvsr. They called it
"Kane Wack," meaning a grassy place
or glade. I wrote It down and then
mindful of the click of the telegraph
Instrument and the swing of the pen
in the hands of those who would write
the name millions of times I wrote un
derneath, "Kennewlck." It became an
Important point during the construc
tion of the branch. Later on some
town lots were located and a postofflce
established under another name, but
the railroad company stuck to the
name of Kennewlck and the people, tir
ing of having their mail come under
one address and their freight under
another, got the postofflce changed to
Kennewlck. For the convenience of
the railroad company stations were lo
cated about every six miles along the
line, and it became my duty to name
them.
At that time there were only two
settlements between the Columbia and
South Prairie, Yakima City and El
lensburg, and the question of names
was sometimes quite serious. I re
member at one time talking the mat
ter over with Mr. Hannaford, who was
then general freight agent and who
has Just now been made president of
the road. He suggested the advisabil
ity of finding names which had no du
plicates, though the towns might be
in other states. Not wishing to use
the names of individuals or employes
who might afterward prove to be no
credit to the towns named for them,
appropriate Indian 'names were used
where obtainable, and where not the
next most appropriate name was se
lected. In passing over the line today
what strikes one who was familiar
with the country and Its resources in
the raw is the fine towns and com
munities where he did not look for
them and the absence of any special
development where It could reasonably
have been expectd. No doubt the en
terprise or lack of enterprise of the
citizens could explain this. I refuse to
believe that the names that were in
flicted upon them had anything to do
with the case. H. & HCSON.
KEEPING CHICKENS A FINE ART.
Every One Cant Be Expected to Have
8 access With a Flock.
PORTLAND, Aug. 26. (To the Edi
tor.) By way of answering the query
of J. M.. asking why I do not "grow my
own eggs," I will state that the sole
excuse I have to offer Is that I am not
in the chicken business.
By the same sfgn J. If. will know
why I do not make my trousers, wash
my linen, remove spots from my top
hat, and act as my own banker. I am
a firm believer in keeping to my knit
ting. Had I any surplus time and as
extra stock of energy, I might pos
sibly tackle the chicken ranch game.
but as matters now stand I am kept
pretty Dusy earning my salary, mow
ing the lawn, cultivating the flowers,
saving the country, writing to the
press, eating, sleeping, resting and
hooking my wife up the back.
And again I believe in giving the
other fellow a chance. The chicken
raiser buys my coffee and spices, he
tickles me and I, In turn, take a chance
with his hen fruit and tickle him. This
Is reciprocity, "and it Is also the dyna
mics that makes the world go round.
Furthermore, It is the economical plan
of life and life's Intricacies. Every man
to his business. I have never manicured
a live chicken's feet. I wouldn't know
whther to give paregoric or catnip
tea in case of cholera among my chick
ens. This thing of getting other people to
do your work is no easy Job, I beg you
to believe. Getting me to do some other
fellow's work Is an utter Impossibility.
I work people and they work me, and
It Is all work.
If I planted chickens and "grew" my
own eggs, it would be only a question
of time when the subject of pork chops
came up and some well-meaning reader
of and writer for The Oregonian would
rise and. ask, "Why don't you keep a
pig?"
There Is no end to this "raise it at
home" system. It may be all right, too,
for those who have the time and the
Inclination, but as for my single self
time is pretty well taken up with the
little duties I have mentioned above,
and my Idle hours are spent in propa
gating beautiful flowers, sweeping the
walks, cutting weeds from other peo
ple's vacant lots, splitting kindling for
the kitchen stove, shaving myself,
reading the papers, talking politics and
writing checks for household supplies.
These little odd Jobs keep me from the
dangers of too much leisure and ward
off ennui, and I believe they will suf
fice for my needs.
R. G. DUNCAN.
Overheard at Seashore Resort.
Puck.
Miss fiummerboard Have you
noticed what delightful air this is?
Why, It absolutely Intoxicates 'one.
Cleverton H'm! It ought to. They
charge champagne prices.
Darning Her Husband's Socks.
Philadelphia Record.
Mrs. Burg-Ins Do you darn your hus
band's socks? Mrs. Dashaway No. I
speak of them a little more profanely
than that-
The X-Ray Skirt
By Dean Col Una.
When Albee hung his solemn ban
On X-ray skirts and maids who dare
em.
And ordered every copper man
To pinch each parson who might wear
'em. '
In curiosity I sought
Full long and hard, but all for naught.
For in the sidewalk's passing whirl
I could not find an X-ray girl.
Devoutly aa a Persian priest
I turned each ev'ning toward the sun.
Thinking. "There must be one at
least!"
But I could never spot that ona
Upon the highways I could note
Ne'er a translucent petticoat;
I looked until my poor eyes hurtr
But never saw an X-ray skirt.
But Mother Eve ne'er cared to bite
The apple till she was forbid it
Then. Just to show she had the right.
She very promptly went ahd did it.
And modern woman, I believe,
la very Ilka her mother, Eve. i
And 'tis a rash man who will dare
To tell her what she may not wear.
L'ENVOL
Though strolling on the busy way.
No X-ray girl has met my gaze,
I fear at some near future day
That style of dress will be the craze
And universal favor find.
Now that we've put it in their mind.
Oh, Mr. Mayor, how rash thou wart
To ban the lucid X-ray skirt!
ON HOW TO SAVE TS FROM DECAY.
We Mnat Keep Human flood Always la
Mind, Vrgea Writer.
PORTLAND, Aug. 25. (To the Edi
tor.) President Emeritus Eliot of Har
vard would save civilization from de
cay and dissolution which threatens it
by putting "Into execution all the meas
ures which Christian ethics and the
medical arts and sciences recommend.
Such Is part of his address delivered
at the International Congress of School
Hygiene at Buffalo.
This advice seems of doubtful value.
In my opinion it is of no value at all.
First, there Is no' fixed, accepted, con
sistent system of morality known as
"Christian ethics." Those who profess
themselves its promulgators and sus
talners are worlds apart, not only on
theoretical grounds, as In the contro
versy between free will and predestina.
tion. but also on many of the most vital
social problems of today, as marriage,
divorce. Industrial justice, war, prop,
erty rights, etc Any work on evolu
tionary morals, as that of Wester
marck, Hobhouse or W. G. Sumner
(particularly the tatter's discussion of
the relation between religion and the
mores), provides aDundant proof of the
lack of deflniteness and stability In
what the university president broadly
refers to as "Christian ethics."
In the second place President Eliot
assumes an invariable agreement be
tween what he calls "Christian ethics"
and the state of medical art and sci
ence at any particular time. Dr. Eliot
thinks of his ethical standard as some
thing eternal, absolute and right under
all circumstances. On the other hand,
we know that medical science, like all
knowledge, is subject to correction,
modification and growth aa the bound
aries of the unknown are pushed back.
Hence It follows that If Christian eth
ics Is the same today as 300 years a so.
It certainly cannot be In harmony with
the medical art and science of the
20th century. Since that time medical
science has developed to a point where
it has adopted the deterministic atti
tude toward life of modern physiology
and biology, recognizing the Interac
tion of the two factors of heredity and
environment as Immediately causative
of health and disease.
The fatal defect in Dr. Eliot's pre
scription Is that ne falls to recognize
his own "odola specus," as Bacon called
it; his personal bias in favor of ideas
and judgments he was reared under,
and has regarded as, true all hia life
long. Thia failure to detach himself
from the past prevents htm from sea
ing the absurdity of trying to "recon
cile his personal fetish with the in
finitely broader demands of the 20th
century. He realises something is
wrong, but the thought that it may
have something to do with his ethical
standard never occurs to him. He can
not see that ethical standards develop
out of life and not life out of ethical
standards. Because he misses this very
vital point, he recommends something
that sounds almost like Irony In the
light of what we know today concern
ing ethical science.
By all means let ns avail ourselves
of all that medical art and science has
to offer for the advancement of hu
manity. But let us keep human good
Itself rather than outgrown systems In
mind as the measure of all things.
H. C. UTHOFF.
ANIMALS ARE ALL, AMBIDEXTROUS
With Decline of Militarism, Twe-Hnad-cdaeaa
for Men la ITrged.
Chicago Tribune-
Right-handedness and right-eyedness
came with genus homo. Dr. George M.
Gould hag watched for them In squir
rels that use their front paws to hold
nuts, cats that strike at insects in the
air or play with wounded mice and In
many other animals, but be is certain
no preference Is given to the right side
over the left.
But in the lowest human savage all
over the world choice In greater ex
pertness of one hand Is clearly present
One cause for Its development Is in
primitive military customs. In all
tribes and countries since man used
implements of offense and defense the
left side, js-here the heart lies, has been
protected by the -shield, and the left
hand was called the shield hand, while
the right hand was called the spear
hand.
Next to fighting came commerce.
The fundamental conditions of barter
ing was counting with the low num
bers, one to ten. The fingers of the
free or right hand were naturally first
used, and ail fingers today are called
digits, aa are the figures themselves,
while the basis of our numberings is
the decimal or ten-fingered system.
Every drill and action of the soldier
from ancient Greece to modern Amer
ica Is right-sided in every detail. Fir
ing from the right shoulder and sight
ing with the right eye bring the right
eye Into prominence.
It is significant that with the de
cline of militarism comes the sugges
tion of schools for ambidexterity and
the establishment of a movement for
promulgating the gospel of two-han-dedness
and its obvious advantages.
A Poor Sort of Father.
Pearson's.
The other day the Duke of Westmin
ster lent Grosvenbr House for a meet
ing of the Invalid Children's Aid As
sociation, and during the meeting one
very good story was told.
A speaker mentioned that one child
who had been helped by the society
was asked for her father's name.
"Smith." she said.
"And what Is bis Christian name?"
was the next question.
"'E ain't got one." answered the
child, obviously not having a ghost of
an Idea what sort of a thing a Chris
tian name might be.
"Oh. he must have one!" persisted
the questioner. "Let me see; what does
your mother call him?"
"Block'ead!" was the staggering re
Ply. m
A Perfectly Natural tnery.
Judge.
Said the friendly city boarder
To his country host "I see
Tou have honey on the table.
Tell me, do you keep a bee?"
Half a Century Ago
Front The Oregonian of August 28. 1883.
Leavenworth. Aug. 21. Last night
the guerilla Chief Quantrell with 800
men crossed from Missouri Into Kansas,
near Gardener. SO miles below here, and
started for Lawrence, arriving there at
4 o'clock this morning, posted guards
around the city so no citizen could
escape, and then the remainder of his
command aacked the city, pillaging
stores, shooting citizens and firing
houses. The loss by fire Is about 12.
000,000. General Jamas H. Lane was In
the city and it la feared he has fallen
into the hands of the guerillas.
In Wednesday morning's Issue we
mentioned the fact that a military com
pany was being formed called the
Washington Guards. We have now the
names of a number of the citizens of
Portland, who are forming another
company. They are: George T. Myers,
John McCraken, H. Saxer, W. w.
Spalding, James W. Going, Jacob
Stitzel, Ben L. Norden, J. W. J. pier
son. Mark A. King, A. B. Richardson.
J. W. Jordan, A. B. Stuart Marcus
Freeman, L. M. Starr, A J. Butler. E.
G. Randall, Joseph Buchtel, H. H. Biack,
Richard B. Knapp, Charles E. Hodgklns!
T. A Davis, R. J. Ladd, A J. Knott G.
F. Greene, Levi Estes, W. 8. Caldwell.
H. H. Johnston. L. F. Grover, H. A.
Gehr, P. C. Schuyler, F. C. Pomeroy.
Theodore F. Miner, S. J. McCormlck.
Charles Binder, H. L. Herman, John
Everest, G. Campbell, II. Jones, W. F.
Cornell, T. W. Rhoses. L. C Millard.
James McKinney, Joseph Werta, F. N.
O. Plummer.
Twenty-five Years Ag9
From The Oregonian of August 28. 1888.
Salem. Or Aug. 27. Rev. Clark
Braden, tha noted Christian contro- '
verstalist now delivering a series of
lectures at Sllverton. has accepted a
challenge issued by the Sllverton Sec
ular Union on behalf of B. F. Under
wood, of Boston, for a series of theo
logical debates to take place In Sll
verton. Ellensbury, W. T Aug. 2T. W. R.
Smith. C Smith and Messrs. Allaky,
Woodard and Day arrived this after
noon from the Conconully mining dis
trict on their way to Portland. They
report a rich strike In the face of the
Arlington tunnel.
Dr. W. W. Royal has Just returned
from a fishing excursion on Gordon
Creek, east of this city.
An attempt will be made to gravel
Russell street A.'blna. before tha bad
weather sets In.
C. E. DuBols. of the Board of Immi
gration, left yesterday for Columbus,
0 with a display of cereals. He also
took specimens of Bartlett and Clapp's
Favorite pears. Silver and Hungarian
prunes, Columbia and Bremmer plums.
The only applea obtainable were soma
of the Red Bathinger.
Prof. Wetzell received a letter yes
terday from J. D. Letcher, Secretary of
the State Agricultural College, asking
him to call attention to the free schol
arships in that Institution. Fifteen Is
the number falling to - Multnomah
County.
A plat of Highland was filed in the
County Recorder's office yesterday bv
Theodore Wygant and wife, and J. W.
Going and wife.
The special board of engineers ap
pointed by the Secretary of War to
Investigate the matter ot a steamboat '
railway around The Dalles of the Co
lumbia met at the office of Maj. Hand
bury yesterday.
1 Aa the Pitcher Winds TTn.
Puck.
From Second Base Put er right
over, big as a barn he can't hit it
From Right Field Make 'lm hit it
ol' man; make 'lm hit It
From the Shortstop 'Nother strike
out ol' sport This Is a punkin.
From the Side Lines Make 'em put
It over. Walt fer a good one. Make
'lm cut the plate.
From the Catcher (signaling for a
straight ball) Now one o' them curly
ones under the chin. T"row it right at
his bill.
From the Left Field Ho! Hoi Here's
an easy one! Toss It to 'lm.
From the Bench Bat 'er down this
way, ol' dub, an" watch me eat it
From Third Base Cut the pan, ol'
sport; cut the pan they can't touch it
In a t'ousand years.
From the Bleachers Right on the
nose, Chlmmle. right on the nose. A
nice clean single, bo, a nice clean sin
gle." "Han' 'lm one of. them fadeawaya"
"Move the fielders back 'bout a mile."
"A home run. Chimmie, a home run."
"Bat 'er down to shortstop he can't
never stop It"
"Wait fer a base on balls, ol' man
the pitcher's wild."
"Knock the cover ofTn It"
"Kill It! Kill it!"
"Here's Ave dollars, me boy, for a
home run."
"Make 'em be good, ol' scout make
'em be good."
Then from the umpire, as the pitcher
Is about ready: "Hey, Hold on a minu
ute. Say, there, somebody dust off the
plate a little."
And then it all begins again.
Quotations en Tekoah.
PORTLAND. Aug. 28. (To the Edi
tor.) I read with much Interest every
thing from the facile pen of Addison
Bennett and have done so from the
days of the Oregon Irrigator, of Irri
gon. Or I have read the letter In this
morning's paper about "Tekoah.'
Mr. Bennett is right when he sur
mises that the word can be found In
the Bible. Here are the texts'.
II Samuel xiv 2d and 4th verses:
"And Joab sent to Tekoah and fetched
thence a wise woman," etc
"And when the woman of Tekoah
spake to the King, she fell on her
lace," etc.
So wise people, at least wise women.
lived In Tekoah long ago.
Amos, L 1: "The words or Amos,
who was among the herdmen of Te- .
koa," etc
Tekoah or Tekoa is or was located
about 10 miles south of Jerusalem.
W. S. HOLT.
These Daily Talks
On Advertising
By publishing each day some
thought upon the subject of adver
tising,. It Is our purpose to encour
age among our readers a lively in
terest in the highly profitable habit
of ad. reading.
Advertising news Is now consid
ered to be as Interesting and impor
tant as the news of current events,
and the reader who slights his ad
readlng really does himself a great
Injustice.
The advertising columns con
stantly offer us opportunities to
save money and to make our pur
chases with greater convenience.
If you must slight some part ot
your newspaper, let It not be the
advertising section. ' It holds much
valuable information for you and
you really can't afford to neglect It