io
THE 3IORXIXG OREGOMAN, SATURDAY, MAT
1910.
I'OKTI.AM), OREGON.
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POBTUSD, SATURDAY, MAY, 7. 1910.
HUGHES' REMEDY FOR PRIMARY DE
FECTS. Oregon has suffered evils of the go-as-you-please,
wide-open nominating
primary, and Is coming to the remedy
of the assembly - guided primary.
Those evils are so glaring that Gov
ernor Hughes, of New York, saw that
they must" be avoided in that state
through the assembly plan. The
measure carrying his Idea of assembly
and primary, the Hlnman-Oreen bill,
Is pending in the Legislature of his
state, and is beset -with powerful op
position from politicians of both par
ties. In the State of Indiana last
week Democrats turned from the go-as-you
please primary, by naming a
candidate for United States Sen
ator to succeed Beverldge, in state
convention. Governor Marshall, one
of the leaders of that convention,
defended its action and confessed the
faults of the wide-open primary, aa
1'ollows:
The suggestion that the delegates of the
party, coming fresh from the people, should
name the man -who shall be elected "United
States Senator In the event of Democratic
success, compiles with the Democratic Ideal
of the lost sixteen years, and avoids the
sole objection that could be urged against
that Ideal the Inability of a poor man to
enter the contest.
Oregon's troubles iwlth the direct
primary have been severe. Its of
Jices have been filled with self-seekers,
Its party politics with disruption
and Its primaries with perjured mem
bers of rival political organizations.
'Full sweep has been given to minori
ties to make discord and to Demo
crats to take advantage of Republican
dissension. Direct primaries have
added greatly to expense of campaign
ing, so that only men of large mjans
can make "runs" for Important of
fices. But now Republicans will rec
ommend candidates for nomination at
the primary, by sti-te assembly of
more than 1200 members. This as
sembly will pick fittest men for nomi
nations, and voters in the primary will
have a ticket before them that is
vouched for by the most representa
tive body of citizens In the common
wealth. And should the voters dislike
the ticket or any members of it, they
can reject all or any of it in the pri
mary and name men of their own
choosing.
This appeals to Governor Hughes
and his so-called radical friends in
New York as a very proper primary
system, and they have embodied it In
their Hinman-Green bill. Assemblies
or conventions composed of members
of state and local central c-mmittees
are to name advisory tickets for pri
maries. In Oregon, however, the as
sembly is to be composed of more than
12 00 delegates chosen from the body
of the Republican electorate. In New
York the Hughes plan is considered
severely radical, and there is no de
mand for the system hitherto prac
ticed In Oregon. Yet In Oregon a
body of citizens profess to believe the
use of assembly as a scheme of reac
tionaries who oppose the "rule of the
people."
The assembly precursor of primary
will go far to cure tl-.j defects of di
rect nomination. It did so in Port
land last year and the better person
nel of the city government vindicates
the improvement. The Hughes plan
in New York is meeting the opposi
tion of desperate politicians of both
parties, which is evidence enough that
it will unseat them from power and
transfer control of pi.rty organization
to the people.
ATHLETIC MtOCrRESS.
The resolutions adopted by the
faculty at Eugene on the subject of
intercollegiate athletics are expressed
in language so extremely learned that
it Is difficult to decipher their mean
ing. After some little effort a tenta
tive translation has been prepared for
one sentence and it is here presented:
"Under the best conditions intercol
legiate athletics promotes friendly re
lations among the colleges. Under
ordinary conditions it promotes hostil
ity." If this translation is correct, a
matter which is more than doubtful,
it must be confessed that the faculty
of the State University, in spite of
their learning, or perhaps because of
It, have managed to hit upon a pro
found truth. Persons who have paid
somy attention to contests between
college have seldom failed to notice
the bitterness, the trickery, the resort
to small deceptions, which almost In
variably prevail. So far are they from
promoting anything like friendship be
tween institutions that they actually
create and foster the petty vices of
Jealousy and spite.
Taking everything into account, it
Is pretty safe to say that intercol
legiate athletics has done aa much
harm as good In the last ten years.
The charge of the faculty that "It
leads to an apotheosis of physical
prowess and consequent disparage
ment of mental achievement" is
strictly true in spite of its poly
syllables. The big man of the col
lege among the students, and among
many members of the faculties also,
is the beefy football champion. His
brains are of no consequence. His
moral character does not matter
greatly. The all Important fact is
that he can thrust himself by brute
strength through the opposing line.
It is time that this ideal of manhood
were modified. Physical prowess is
all very well, but the most useful cit
izen is not necessarily a very muscular
man. In the evolution of the human
race, intelligence has counted for a
good deal more than physical prowess
and that Is likely to be the case for
some time to come. The moderate
athletic sports which the students of
each college will of their own accord
practice among themselves without
discord and without much noise are
the most wholesome for their bodies
and interfere least with the activity of
their minds.
The spectacle of a band of young
men traveling boisterously about the
country to take part in gladiatorial
combats is not in Itself edifying, and
the examination marks which are
earned during the performance must
be largely fictitious. How many col
leges can raise their right hands and
solemnly deny that they count athletic
skill as the equivalent of Homer and
Euclid?
THE SEWER-PIFE GRAFT.
Mayor Simon is to be commended
for his effort to admit competition
in prices of sewer pipe. Prices are
excessive, and have been so many
years. They are part of the scheme
of graft of the plumbing and clay-pipe
trust, whose insatiate maw devours
greedily the substance of a defense
less public. The Plumbing Inspector,
be it noted, opposes the proposed
raid on the trust, declaring he will
not allow use of glazed cement pipe.
The Councilman who engages in the
plumbing . business and supports
the graft of the trust, Mr. Rushlight,
declares he will fight any ordinance
that proposes to break this monopoly
of clay pipe. And an evening news
paper, whose master, Mr. Bates, is
head of the clay-pipe trust, also makes
war on this endeavor to save the peo
ple's money.
Now here is an array of gentfemen
whose professed friendship for the
people is a pretty sight to behold in
this emergency. Here we have a
tightly organized plunderbund, com
posed of clay-pipe manufacturers,
plumbing supply manufacturers.
Jobbers, bosses and Journeyman's
union, boosting the cost of plumb
ing to intolerable figures An
essential part of this combine la that
of clay-pipe makers, who, as yet, have
no competition to meet, who charge
all the traffic will bear, and who have
grown rich with a quickness that has
made the public wonder.
Cement pipe, imperfectly made, is
porous and unsanitary. So also is
clay pipe, when imperfectly made.
But only perfet l pipe is supposed to
be admitted - into city -work. Glazed
cement pipe, the City Engineer de
clares, is safe and satisfactory for
sewer uses. Common sense accords
with this view.
Will the city allow magnates of the
trust to shut out cement pipe and con
tinue to mulct the public?
FIRST LEI THEM INQUIRE.
In the State of Washington there is
a. Direct Legislation League, made up
of pure men who are sure they are all
right and everybody else all wrong.
It has headquarters at Seattle, and it
is busy with its propaganda. The
Direct Legislation League is not satis
fied of course to work out reform and
improvement on approved and time
tested lines. What It wants is revolu
tion something entirely different
from any scheme of government
worked out by experience through sev
eral thousand years. Here is the
twaddle put forth by the Direct Legis
lation League of Washington:
It is some work to devise a good law. to
write out Its full text and to obtain for it
the attested signature of 8 per cent of all
the legal voters in the state. No one is
going to undertake so much work unless
there appears to be sound reason why the
Bald law should exlet; nor- unless there is
expectation that a majority of the people
will vote for it when It comes to them for
approval or disapproval at the next election
To secure the right of Initiative and ref
erendum is the only sure way for the people
to get such laws as they want.
The initiative is the only sure way
for a few people to get the laws they
think they want. It is no work at all
for a certain kind of statesman the
new Oregon type to devise a law, for
apparently they have nothing else in
the world to do. The law is framed
and submitted under the initiative and
the people must accept it or reject It
just as it stands, without opportunity
for compromise, correction, revision or
amendment. That is not law-making;
It is law-breaking, since it breaks down
the established forms of legislation
and government, and leads to con
fusion, uncertainty and chaos.
If the people of Washington are
seriously thinking about the initiative
they can find out a few things about
that wonderful invention by inquiry
from Oregon.
OUR TASTERS.
In a modest way Portland has been
struck by a fasting mania. No fatal
consequences have been reported thus
far, but nobody knows (what will hap
pen if the victims of the malady do
not recover soon. The fasting mania
is a new form of an old mental dis
order. It may be compared, to the
rage for whipping their bare backs
which sometimes seizes upon religious
devotees in certain sects. The poor
deluded creatures will rain blows upon
their bleeding shoulders until they
drop down in complete exhaustion.
The supposition is that the Almighty
Is pleased to look on and marks off a
certain fraction of their sins for each
blow.
It is not understood that the Port
land fasters are undergoing the tor
ture for the benefit of their souls. It
is rather their bodies "which they ex
pect to fortify and cleanse by abstain
ing from food. The process resembles
the ancient one, so sadly familiar to
wives with lazy husbands, of trying to
sustain fire without fuel. Some of the
maniacs may reach the degree of suc
cess which was attained by the man
who resolved to keep his horse with
out oats or hay. His diet was reduced
by insensible stages to three straws a
day, when the unhappy beast inter
rupted the scientific experiment by
perishing.
Far be it from us to hint that any
of our local fasters may meet with a
similar calamity, and yet it is pos
sible. One person informs The Ore
gonlan that after a fast of nineteen
days, some years ago, he fell into a
mental collapse from which he never
has fully recovered, but we do not
deny that this may be a rare exception
to the rule. The learned Dr. Fletcher
tells in one of his entertaining books
of fasts which he has made covering
forty and even sixty days. Some of hi3
patients have done the same thing.
At least he says they have. This
makes the much belauded scriptural
miracles of forty-day fasts look rather
petty. Elijah must look to his laurels.
The necessity for devouring food Is
an expensive and somewhat vulgar
burden which nature has imposed
upon us. Just .at present it is pe
culiarly obnoxious because of the high
cost of nourishment. Perhaps it is
this circumstance which has stimu
lated the fasters to make their heroic
experiments, though we incline to our
first opinion that it is a species of in
sanity. Still one would not wish to
appear a bigot concerning the matter.
If the fasters really are seeking to
find a method of permanently living
without food they have The Oregon
ian's best wishes for their complete
success, and none v-ill join more
heartily than this paper in the laugh
which -will ensue at the chagrin of the
Beef Trust and its rapacious allies.
KING EIW ARI.
Albert Edward, born Prince of
Wales, was the second child and first
son of the late-Queen Victoria and the
Prince Consort. He was born Novem
ber 24, 1841. and was therefore in the
6 9th year of his age. He succeeded
to the throne of Great Britain and
Ireland upon the death of his mother,
January 22, 1901, and two days later
was proclaimed "Edward VII, by the
grace of God, King of the United
Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland,
defender of the faith and Emperor
of India." He held his first levee on
February 11, following, and three
days later opened parliament.
Though devotedly attached to Queen
Victoria, the accession of King Ed
ward was, from the first, hailed with
Joy by all classes of the English peo
ple. The pomp and ceremony of roy
alty had been largely eliminated from
state functions for many years. Since
the death of the Prince onsort, in
1861, the Queen had been a perpetual
mourner, shutting herself away from
public functions as far as j-osslble.
The elimination of this vain show of
grief from state functions was grate
ful to the English people, while the
substitution of the masculine for the
feminine mind in the perfunctory du
ties of government that devolve upon
the sovereign was a change that was
not unwelcome and duly appreciated.
The King's long tutelage in the du
ties of his position made him a popu
lar and positive force as King in the
life of the British people from the
first, and this popularity he enjoyed in
increasing measure to the end. He
was a monarch to be reckoned with
for peace, for international courtesy,
and for the dignity of the nation.
His functions as a ruler were closely
circumscribed by the constitution of
the realm, and he exercised these
with such formal circumstance as the
people loved and approved of without
essaying prerogatives of which the
crown, in the processes of years, had
been shorn.
As Prince of Wales, King Edward
was in his childhood and boyhood the
idol of his mother's subjects. As a
youth he was courted and feted and
made much of throughout the conti
nent of Europe. He visited the
United States in 1860 and was most
graciously received by the people. The
country, socially speaking, was at his
feet. Under such circumstances his
life was not always one of rectitude,
but the delinquencies of his youth
have long since been forgotten by his
people, or remembered only as inci
dent to the temptations to which he
was subjected on every hand. March
10, 1863, he was married to Princess
Alexandra of Denmark, who for nearly
half a century has filled the high sta
tion to which she attained In early
girlhood with dignity, self-respect and
absolute devotion to duty. She has
been faithful to her husband as Prince
and King, a devoted mother to his
children, and for nine years the grace
ful, beloved sharer of the English
throne.
Five children were born to them,
two sons and three daughters. The
oldest son, Edward, Duke of Clarence,
heir apparent to the throne, died in
1892 while yet in his early manhood.
The second son, George, Prince of
Wales, will succeed his father as
George V. His oldest daughter, Lou
ise, married some years ago the Duke
of Fife, a subject of the realm.
Maude, the second daughter, is the
wife of King Haakon of Norway.
Victoria, the remaining daughter, is
unmarried, the constant companion of
her mother, and in conjunction with
her a faithful nurse of the King in
many of his minor illnesses.
King Edward lies today upon his
bier honored among men a man of
high repute for peace and amity
among nations, a King truly mourned
by his people. Sixty years Prince of
Wales, nine years a King, the white
light of the throne has beaten con
stantly upon his path. That it has
revealed some things that were bet
ter left in the shadow is true. But
that it has shown a generous nature,
an amiable disposition, a willingness
to accept responsibility with dignity
and to discharge the duties of life ac
ceptably is also true. Beloved for all
things lovable In his character; hon
ored as hereditary Prince and King
for nearly three-score and ten years,
he has finished his course and gone
the way of all living.
PERMITS AND TRANSFERS.
It. is by comparison with some of
the Yiear-by cities that the remark
able growth of Portland makes the
most effective showing. The Seattle
Daily Bulletin Monday printed the
totals for real estate transfers and
building permits for the month of
April. These figures show a total for
the month of J2, 074, 795 in real estate
transfers and $1,389,500 in building
permits. The Portland real estate
transfers for the month of April, as
compiled toy the Daily Abstract, were
$2,975,068, and the Building permits
reached a total of 2. 014,772. Accord
ing to the Seattle paper, the total real
estate transfers for the first four
months of 1910 in that city have to
taled J9, 743, 224. The Portland trans
fers for the same period were $13,119 -941.
One noticeable feature of the Seattle
statistics is the low average cost of
the structures for which building permits-
are issued. The April totals of
11.389,500 represented 1243' permits,
an average of but J1118 each. In
Portland there were but 614 permits
represented in the total valuation of
$2,014,772, showing an average -alue
per structure of $3266. This apparent
difference in the cost of buildings
erected at Seattle and Portland is
largely due to the number of small
repair permits which are taken out in
Seattle. At Portland it is a rare oc
currence for a permit to be issued for
less than $100. Notwithstanding the
record-breaking volume of real estate
transfers and building permits that
have been recorded every month this
year, there does not seem to be an
Immediate possibility of cessation.
The business for the first few days of
May was fully up to that reported in
the early part of the preceding
months, and there is enough business
already in the hands of architects and
contractors, for which permits have
not been issued, to bring the totals
to figures far in excess of May, 1909.
If the present volume of real estate
transfers is maintained throughout
the year, as now seems probable, the
total will reach $40,000,000. With
building permits in excess of $5,000,
000 for the first three months of the
year, a total of $15,000,000 for the
twelve months would not be at all
surprising.
The practice by some insurance
companies of paying as little for
loss as they can by bluffing
the insurer, regardless of premiums
collected, received a setback in the
case of W alter To' ze, the well-known
Oragjnian whose large store at Falls
Citv was burnet more than two
fmonths ago. He carried $43,b00 In
policies, and as late as a short time
before the fire another agent sought
to write another $10,000. Adjusters
offered $20,000 in full settlement,
which Mr. Tooze rightfully and
promptly refused. Effort to arbitrate
failed of agreement on a third mem
ber. When Mr. Tooze initiated pro
ceedings to collect by law the insur
ance companies "came through" with
an offer of $42,75 0, which was satis
factory. The lesson shown in the
case to possible losers by fire is that
foreign companies cannot hand a gold
brick to the man whose nerve and
backbone are, of the proper consist
ency and caliber.
The salmon run, like a run on the
hank, was much smaller the second
day of the Spring season than the
first, and the third day's run was
smaller than the second. This would
seem to confirm the reports that many
of the thrifty fishermen had been pre
paring for the event, and, in their de
sire to open the season with the proper
show of prosperity, had some caches
of "catches" on which they drew for
reserves as soon as the proceeding was
safe. In this respect the 1910 salmon
season does not differ materially from
its predecessors. The policy of con
serving our fishery resources will
never become so thoroughly under
stood and appreciated as to prevent
some greedy fishermen from making
an attempt to catch every salmon that
comes into the river. With so many
fishermen showing a strong desire to
kill the goose that lays the golden
eggs, it is perhaps surprising that sal
mon are as plentiful as they are.
The British steamship Janeta, char
tered to load wheat, at Portland, has
been diverted to Puget Sound. The
German steamship Augustus, now ly
ing in this port, lined and ready for
a wheat cargo, may also be sent to
the Puget Sound port. This shifting
of business that rightfully belongs to
Portland is said to be due to the fact
that both grainhandlers and long
shoremen's wages are lower on Puget
Sound than at Portland, and that
there is no "strike talk" in the air at
Tacoma and Seattle. As a means of
promoting industrial peace along the
waterfront, the diversion of all of our
shipping to Puget Sound might prove
successful. This accomplished, -we
might also be afforded the spectacle of
some of the high-priced Portland la
bor following the business to Puget
Sound and gladly -accepting the pre
vailing wages of the port.
The Chicago wheat market is on
the up grade again, and prices for the
May option have reached a figure
where any farmer within a thousand
miles of the Chicago market can se
cure the "dollar per bushel" right on
the farm. If the 1909 crop were
within 100,000,0000 bushels of the
figure which Secretary Wilson says it
reached, there should still be a sur
plus of at least 100,000,000 bushels
available for export from this country.
One hundred millions is not a large
sum in a country that now annually
turns off about $3,000,000,000 worth
of farm products, but if we could sell
as much to the foreigners Just at this
time, it would go far toward plugging
up the hole which our heavy imports
are making in that time-honored "bal
ance of trade" that we have come to
regard as essential to our commercial
health and happiness.
"A sea king's daughter from over
the sea" went Princess Alexandra of
Denmark to marry Albert Edward,
Prince of Wales. She was a young
girl then barely 16 years old a
dainty figure in hoopskirts and filmy
wedding gown. Today she is Dowa
ger Queen of England, sad-faced,
dark-robed, sorrowful with the lines
of nearly fifty years of life's vicissi
tudes written upon her still beautiful
face. Yet no woman In all the realm
is so beloved as she is today. Not
alone because she was long the wife
and is now the widow of a Prince and
King of the realm, but for the tender
graces, the divine patience, the gentle
virtues that have characterized her
life throughout the years.
Five hundred are killed by an earth
quake in Costa Rica and 200 meet a
similar fate in a mining horror in
Alabama. Superstitious and ignorant
people may be Inclined to trace these
tragedies to the presence of the comet.
Had the earthquake horror occurred
on a different date from the mining
tragedy, superstition would have had a
better hold on the situation. As it is,
we must charge the Costa Rica trag
edy up to one of those world-old con
vulsions of nature against which it is
impossible for mankind to guard. The
other is, of course, due either to the
carelessness or the negligence of man.
Coal-mine disasters are always pre
ventable, if gross carelessness is not
the rule.
"Cerisus Supervisor Hill," says a Se
attle dispatch, "has been much criti
cised for his extreme scrutiny of
names in Seattle, every doubtful one
and every possible duplicate being
thrown out, with the result that the
total count in Seattle is expected to
be lower than the most conservative
estimate." Too bad. Who is re
sponsible for the grave blunder of
getting an honest man to take the Se
attle census?
The eating habit, acquired early in
life, can be overcome by firm superi
ority of mind over matter and the
money saved will buy flowers a-plenty
for the final triumph. Yet most peo
ple will eat to live rather than fast to
die.
In the pocket of a legless tramp
found by the track at Clackamas yes
terday was a bottle of whisky. As the
bottle was not empty, the death may
be classed as premature.
Uncle Sam wants symmetry in
army recruits, with an exception for
bowlegged men in the cavalry arm of
the service. The idea is all right for
times of peace.
The world needs fuel and these
ever-recurring mine disasters are but
part of the prics-
T. R. IS NOT IX RACE FOR 191
John Callan O'Laughlin Brlnss) This
Word Prom Europe.
Washington Dispatch Chicago Tribune.
While Colonel Theodore Roosevelt has
declined to talk to anyone as to his atti
tude with respect to the Presidential
nomination in 1912, I am convinced from
everything he has said bearing upon poll
tics that It is his earnest wish not to be,
a candidate for that honor.
I have Just returned from Paris, where
I left the Colonel enjoying the splendid
hospitality of the French people. After
being with him for six weeks, joining
him far up the White Nile and continu
ing with him through the Soudan, Egypt.
Italy, Austria, Hungary and France, I
am in a position now to state his atti
tude regarding the Republican nomination
a little more than two years hence.
I saw all the letters he received from
the time Ve boarded the Dal, the gov
ernment steamer carrying him down the
Nile, until I left him in Paris, I saw the
responses which he made to these com
munications. Many of these letters re
lated to politics. His correspondents
gave him full details of the political sit
uation in the United States and insisted
he was the only man who could possibly
save the Republican party from defeat.
Mr. Roosevelt earnestly wishes not to
be a candidate for the nomination. There
is not the slightest doubt that Mr. Roose
velt is keenly Interested In the develop
ments in connection with public affairs
at home and Is eager to ascertain for
himself the exact character of the events
which have occurred. - The information
he has received from his correspondents
has been complete In detail and comes
from sources in which he has confidence.
At the same time he does not intend
finally to make up his mind about many
important public questions until he is on
the ground and is able to reach a conclu
sion based upon personal Inquiry and con
tact with various men Interested In these
matters in whom he has confidence and
with whom undoubtedly he will talk after
his arrival.
Because he is an ex-President -does not
relieve Colonel Roosevelt from his duty
as a citizen, and he realizes this fact him
self. It may be taken for granted, there
fore, that he will stand in the future, as
he has always stood, squarely and firmly
for the things which will benefit and
promote the prosperity of all the people
of the United States. He will make this
clear in speeches he will deliver at Chey
enne. Wyo., the latter part of August, in
Kansas on the occasion of the dedication
of the John Brown battlefield, and In
the address he will deliver before the
conservation congress.
There will be no criticism of anybody
In his speeches. He will devote himself
solely to the discussion of the great ques
tions in which he has shown always the
keenest Interest and the right solution of
which he regards as vital to the happi
ness and development of the people.
ANOTHER CONSERVATION HOAX.
Uncle Sum Keeps) Land While Neigh
bors Pump Out the Oil.
San Francisco Chronicle.
There have recently been important dis
coveries and developments of mineral oil
In this state to a very large extent on
land which was considered almost value
leas and which has consequently remained
either as publio land or unoccupied if in
public ownership. Naturally the first no
tion of the professional conservationists
was to withdraw from entry all publio
sands suspected of bearing mineral oil,
lest somebody should find it and develop
it for the beneficial use of this generation.
And the land about 2,500,000 acres was
withdrawn as soon as the apostles of con
servation could get to the President.
Judge Curtis H. Lindley, however, has
taken the trouble to point out that most
of the land in this district Is already in
private ownership, some of It, apparently,
being within the limits of an old railroad
land grant, and some having been filed
on in one of the may ways of acquiring
publio land. On all this privately owned
land, which Is proved or promising oil ter.
ritory, development is about as active as
it can be. It is certain that the under
lying oil is all connected, so that It vir
tually forms one body, and if the with
drawn lands are kept withdrawn long
enough, all the oil now under their sur
face will have been pumped out into
the tanks of those awful monopolies,
the Southern Pacific Company and the
Standard Oil Company. It is not al
leged that these bloated and wicked
monopolies were the first to put It into
the heads of the conservationists to
cause these withdrawals, but we do not
think either of them is too good to do
that by roundabout suggestion, or were
not the first to recognize, what a bless
ing to them such a withdrawal wiould
be. But it Is unwise to allege what one
is unable to prove. The only thing that
Is safe to say Is that men of good in
tentions who act upon impulse and emo
tion are quite as likely to do mischief as
to do good.
No mineral lands should be with
drawn from entry. All mineral discov
eries are the result of speculative pros
pecting in which there are 100 failures
for every important success. It is only
the hope of great gain which will in
duce the prospector to endure the hard
ships and take the risks of prospecting,
and it is to the advantage of society
that every possible encouragement shall
be given to that hardy and adventurous
race. To withdraw possible mineral
bearing lands from entry is to put an
end to the discovery of minerals.
She Was) an Innocent Victim.
Brooklyn Eagle.
Every one in that part of the car
smiled except the man who did it and
the girl who was under the hat. He
wouldn't let himself, and she did not know
anything about it. He was a plain,
quiet man. apparently of the higher
type of mechanic She was young and
pretty, and had one of the enormous
new hats, with correspondingly enor
mous pins stuck in at various angles.
She was In one of the cross seats and
he was standing behind her. Without
moving a muscle of his face he drew
from his pocket a folding footrule,
carefully measured the expanse of the
brim and let everyone around see that
it was full 85 inches. Then he laid
the ruler along the projecting end of
a hatpin and gave proof that it reached
EH inches beyond the crown. The un
conscious owner of the creation looked
up with a puzzled little frown as her
seat-mate suddenly doubled over in
mirth.
The Idiot at the Breakfast Table.
Harper's Weekly.
"I hope you are satisfied with our
table, Mr. Idiot," said the landlady.
"In the main, yes." replied the Idiot.
"But I really think I ought to regis
ter a complaint against yesterday's
fishballs, madam."
"Why, I am sorry about that." said
the landlady, blushing. "We rather
pride ourselves on our fishballs. What
was the matter with them, sir?"
"Mine had a distinctly fishy taste,"
returned the Idiot.
A Sailor's Prayer.
Quoted by E. S. Bates in the Atlantic
"O Lord. I am no common beggar; I
do not trouble thee every day; for I
never prayed to thee before; and if it
please thee to deliver me this once, I
will never pray to thee again as long
as I live,"
EDUCATION FOB OF" LI4COR EVIL
Prohibition la Matter for Local senti
ment to Decide.
Hood River News.
In view of a campaign which will
no doubt shortly be waged at -lood
River for and against prohibition the
News wishes to place Itself on record
In regard to this matter. It has been
approached to take an active stand on
both sides of this question. Prohibi
tion as we see it is a matter of purely
local interest. Also one in which the
personal liberty of mankind plays an
important part- In othe words, what
Portland may see fit to do in regard
to the prohibition question should
have no bearing on what Hood River
does, and vice versa. We should not
force a course of living upon our fel
low man except with his consent.
Should tae majority of the citizens
of Hood River see fit to continue pro
hibition let them do so. They should
not, however, attempt to force resi
dents of other sections of the state to
refrain from the use of liquor or to
allow residents of other sections to
say what course we shall pursue here.
Furthermore, a greater good can be
accomplished in eradicating the evil
effects of drink through education
than can ever result from compulsory
legislation. The schools of the coun
try at large are doing a greater work
for temperance reform than has ever
been done by anti-saloon and other
leagues, which in many instances have
built up political machines that are not
by any means' above reproach. The
education of the boy or girl in the
public schools as to the baneful effects
of drink is a long step toward solv
ing the prohibition question. And we
might add that if much of the money
and labor that Is spent in securing
legislation and conducting a bellicose
campaign against drink was used in
educating people of adult age against
the use of liquor the results, we be
lieve, would be of much greater
benefit.
YANCEY AND THE CONFEDERACY
In the Beginning; nn Active Rebel, He
Counseled Peace on Any Terns.
LOS ANGELES, Cal., May 2. (To the
Editor.) Anent a recent editorial in
The Oregonian in which some asper
sion is cast on the elder Yancey (pre
sumably William L.), no doubt he
did more than any one man to induce
Alabama to secede from the Union, but
he was in many respects more far
sighted than the most of the Southern
leaders of that day. He labored under
the fallacious Idea that cotton was
king and that England and France
would be compelled to recognize the
independence of the Confederate
states. After he was sent abroad as
an agent of his government, he saw a
new light, and realized for the first
time there was no hope in expecting
assistance from any European power.
In the vernacular of the street he felt
that the South had bit off more than
It could chew with any degree of com
fort. On his return he advised Jefferson
Davis to lose no time In making peace,
on the best terms to be obtained and
had his advice been accepted in this
particular the Civil War might have
been brought to a close two years ear
lier, but Mr. Davis was a man who would
brook no opposition to his own opin
ion. It was said that Senator Yancey
was struck on the head by a large
glass inkstand, thrown by Ben Hill, of
Georgia, while the Senate of the Con
federate states was in secret session,
and that Yancey subsequently died
from the effects of the blow.
I was brought up In Alabama. My
father was .a Union man. Most of my
information concerning that period
was obtained from my father. If my
memory serves me correctly. Colonel
Henry Watterson, of Kentucky, has
published something very similar to
what I have written about the elder
Yancey. If the histories of the past
that have been written are as loosely
drawn as to facts as the bulk of the
histories covering the Civil War, they
are perforated with blow holes. It
seems a difficult task for a man to
write a history and not color it ac
cording to his own views.
W. B. MDONALD.
Woodmen Banish the Goat.
Minneapolis Journal.
Nobody will ever be able any more
to "get the goat" of the Modern Wood
men of America. The high council of
the Woodmen, representing some 7000
members in Minneapolis and more than
1.000,000 the country over, went -into
executive session not long ago and
evolved a plan that will put the or
ganization's goat absolutely out of
reach.
The reason nobody will ever be able
to get the Woodmen's goat from now
on Is that the Woodmen are not going
to have any goat. The only goat any
where around initiation halls hence
forth will be such goat or goats as
are got from the initiate or initiates.
The Woodmen do not say that their
fraternal degree initiation has been re
constructed into a picnic for the can
didates. They guard their language,
but District Deputy J. Q. Sundeen
talked today about the new ritual that
has Just been adopted, and let it be
understood that the one-time strenu
ous goat of the Woodmen has been
taken to the country and farmed you.
Real Engliih Queen Doesn't Reign.
Paris Dispatch.
Although Princess Ludwig of Ba
varia is generally recognized as the
one person .having the greatest right
to the throne of Great Britain, she has
persistently ignored the demonstration
of the English Legitimists. Her right
to the throne is through her descent
from the Stuarts. She Is the last lineal
descendant of the Stuarts and is styled
by the Jacobites and Legitimists
"Queen Mary IV." She was the Princess
Mary of Austria-Modena-Este and is
descended from Henrietta Mary, eighth
child of Charles I. King Edward only
claims descent from a daughter of
James I.
Nothing Left.
Tit-Bits.
"Have you," asked the judge of a
recently convicted man, "anything to
offer the court before sentence is
passed?"
"No, your honor," replied the prison
er, "my lawyer took my last farthing."
The Value of Kin.
Atchison Globe. .
Other people may talk behind your
back and smile to your face, but kin
always have the courage of their con
victions; they'll tell you frankly what
they think of you.
CURRENT NEWSPAPER JESTS.
"There is a draft coming in the window,"
said his wife. "Put .It in the safe," said
the business man, drowsily. Buffalo Ex
press. It's a wise legislator that knows nis own
constituents, hut it's a much wiser con
stituency that knows its own legislator.
Judge.
"This Is the last month the Browns and
the Greens will be friends." "What makes
you say that?" "They've rented a Summer
cottage together." Detroit Free Press.
"I should think that a notorious murderer
like you would hate to make so many
enemies." "I would, pard, but as soon as I
make an enemy I draw my- gun an' un
make him." Cleveland Leader.
"My book is bound to selL" "Yes. it has
got a pretty binding, but It is the contents
of a book that causes it to sell, and some
books which are bound to sell are bound to
be a failure." Houston Post.
"You say yon were away from the office
yesterday because of illness?" said the stern
employer. "Yei." replied the young man
who knew he was discovered. "Several of
the umpire's decisions made me sick."
Washington Star.
LIFE'S SUNNY SIDE
Mark Twain, the humorist, had friends
in this city, and one of them, a woman
who was his hostess at a fflnner on his
last visit to Philadelphia, tells "the fol
lowing story:
"We were talking about the future life,
and the various kinds of reward and pun
ishment that might be expected in the
next world," she said, and Mr. Clemens
took no part In the discussion.
"After a few moments of conversation
on the part of all the other guests, and
complete silence from the humorist, the
woman sitting next to him turned to him
and said:
"Well, Mr. Clemens, aren't you going
to tell us what you think about future
punishment and reward?"
" 1 must ask you to excuse me.
madame,' he replied, you see I have
friends In both places.' " Philadelphia
Times.
The father of Senator Dolllver, of Iowa,
was a Methodist circuit rider In the early
60s In Northern West Virginia.
One Sunday morning he was on his way
to preach at one of his several appoint
ments when he met a young fellow trudg
ing along with a mattock on his shoulder.
Mr. Dolliver, anxious to do good at any
time, stopped his horse and said: "Good
morning, my son. where are you going
this fine day with a mattock on your
t shoulder?" The young fellow answered.
I am going over to dig out a tine big
groundhog; where in thunder are you
going?"
"I am out looking up some of the lost
sheep of Israel," replied the minister.
The young fellow's face lighted up and
he exclaimed: "There's a big buck over
here at Uncle Billy's, and I II bet that's
one of them." National Monthly.
The elevator conductor of a tall office
building, noticing that the colored jani
tor had ridden up with him several times
that morning, remarked: "Sam, this is
the fifth time I have taken you up, but
you have not come down with me."
"Well, you see," Sam replied. "Ah
been washin' windows on de 'leventh floor,
and every now and agin' Ah misses mah
hold and falls out." Success.
Andrew Carnegie at a dinner In Wash
ington deplored the world's excessive arm
aments. "All these billions wasted on
battleships," he said, "are declared to do
good in providing work, in creating pros
perity. That is a shallow and false
optimism. That. In fact, reminds me of
the man who saldwhen his wages were
cut down: 'Well,"" there's one comfort.
When I'm laid up sick I won't loss as
much money as I used to.' " Kansas City
Star.
Harry A. Maxwell, of Indianapolis, at
the Raleigh told this story of Senator
Beveridge, who was the subject of con
versation among a crowd of Hoosiers last
night:
"When President Harrison was Presi
dent of the United States, a delegation
from Indiana came to Washington to
talk over appointments, and while wait
ing in the lobby outside the President's
office at the White House, the conversa
tion turned to lawyers.
" 'Whom do you think the greatest law
yer in the state?" asked one of the
party.
" 'Why, Benjamin Harrison, of course,"
responded two or three of the members
In chorus. 'Not only is President Harri
son the best lawyer in Indiana, but he
is the best in the country. There is abso
lutely no doubt of this."
" 'And whom do you' think the next
best lawyer In the state? was the second
query propounded.
" 'That's easy. Albert J. Beveridge,'
was the response.-
" 'Beveridge? Beveridge?' repeated the.
man. 'You certainly don't mean that
He is hardly old enough to vote, and the
paint on his shingle is still fresh.'
" 'Can't help that,' responded the In
diana man. 'I know Beveridge is the
next best lawyer in the state, because he
says so himself.' " Washington Post.
Why He Was Undecided.
New York Sun.
"The chap who works' on one side of
me," said an office man, "has been
married six weeks, and he sneaks to
the telephone about four times a day
and calls up his wife and then I hear
him saying: 'Dear, how is your head
ache now? I hope you are feeling bet
ter." Then pretty soon he comes back
to his desk and goes to work again all
smiling.
"The man who works on the other
side of me has been married six years,
and he goes to the telephone only when
he's called and then I hear him saying:
'Why, I can't possibly do that, I can't
spare the money'; and then he comes
back to his desk all scowling.
"And, really, when I hear the way
these two men go on I don't know
what to do; I don't know whether to
get married or to stay a bachelor."
Spain') Q,ueen by Light of Match.
Seville Cor. New York Herald.
A curious Incident happened at the
village of Villalba del Alcor. The King
and Queen passed through In an auto
mobile at dusk, and the inhabitants
stood along the highway to see and
acclaim them. King Alfonzo, as usual,
stopped to converse with the authori
ties and the people surrounded the
automobile, presenting flowers to the
Queen. A girl approached the King
and complained because they had come
so late, when it was too dark to see
the Queen.
"What can I do?" asked the King,
laughing.
"If your majesty would like to light
a match and show us the Queen's face,
it would satisfy us," replied the girl.
The King did as suggested, and the
people cheered the Queen enthusiastic
ally. No Symbolism.
Baltimore News.
Nazlmova insists that there is "no
symbolism in Ibsen." Might as well
say there is no cymbalishm in a brass
band.
The Cotmter-Redection.
Punch.
Belinda, when I dumped the other day
My heart before your fashionable boot
tips. And you replied with an immediate 'Nay,
But then bethought you of the love-gbd's
cute tips.
And asked me kindly to remain
Your brother the request was vain.
I have conferred this boon (whene'er I
could)
On those who thought to ease my bosom's
blisters
With friendship's balm; but be It understood
I have no vacancy just now for sisters.
No opening at the present date
For prayerful "followers of my fate."
Dot has been that for ages, so has Joyce;
There's Laura, too, (though her demand
was weaker) ;
But, goodness! had I failed to use my
choice.
Hid I bestowed a berth on every seeker
To serve aa my Platonic chum.
There would have been a fine old scrum.
Besides, Belinda, though your queenly
brows.
Tour perfect elegance, might prove a
treasure
Regarded from the standpoint of a spouse.
X ecarcvijr j ...n u. .... .....
Of friendship's untempestuous throb;
That Is a rather brainy Job.
You'd have to laugh at all my lightest jokes.
To pen the warm encouraging epistle;
Bless you, not every face In furs and toques
That dooms me to devour the leek (or
thistle)
Is fit to join that little band
Who help, who praise, who understand.
No, when the bard Is searching for a wife.
The careless feet of hundreds of enslavers
May pound his soul and prance upon his
life;
But when they proffer him a sister's
favors
He has a right to pick and choose.
And yours. Belinda I refuse.