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About Morning Oregonian. (Portland, Or.) 1861-1937 | View Entire Issue (Sept. 20, 1906)
TIIE MORNING OREGONIAN, THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 20, 1006. 8 Entered at the. Postofftcs at Portland. Or., as Second-Class Matter. SUBSCRIPTION RATES. (E7- INVARIABLY IN ADVANCE. t3 (By Mall or Express.) DAILY, SUNDAY INCLUDED. Twelve months -...$8.00 Fix months .............. Three montii 2.25 One month i J Delivered by carrier, per yean 0.00 Delivered by carrier, per month 75 Less time, per week -20 Sunday, one year 2.50 Weekly, one year (Issued Thursday).... 1.50 Sunday and Weekly, one year 3.50 HOW TO REMIT Send postofflce money order, express order or personal check on your local bank. Stamps, coin or currency are at the sender's risk. EASTERN BUSINESS OFFICE. The 8. C. Beckwlth Special Agency New Tork, room 43-50, Tribune- building. Chi cago, rooms 610-512 Tribune building. KEPT ON SALE. Chicago Auditorium Annex, Postofflcs New! Co.. lid Dearborn street. St. Paul, Minn. N. St Marie, Commercial Station. 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THIRD-TERM CASUISTRY. The North American Review for Sep tember contains an article by some body who signs himself "Q" which ought to delight the souls of those readers who love to divide a hair " 'twixt north and northwest elde." It Is an attempt to show that Mr. Roose velt might with a good conscience break his explicit and reiterated prom ise not to seek or accept a nomination for a third term. The logic of the arti cle is of that peculiar kind which has gained the epithet "Jesuitical," and the morality is borrowed from Machiavelli. Indeed the writer Quotes a page or two from the famous Italian apologist for hypocrisy and deceit In high places to fortify his own conclusions. The editor of the Review stands aside with the re mark that, while "Q'e" reasoning is very delicate, he does jiot himself find it convincing; and most readers of the article will agree with him. It is usually difficult to convince an Anglo Saxon constituency that lying is not lying. Still, the writer addresses himself to his task with a good deal of courage and not without skill, though all the time the reader half suspects that he is poking fun. Take, for example, the first reason assigned to convince us that Mr. Roosevelt may break his word without sin. Men in high places, such as Presidents and Kings, the writer argues, never have been bound by "the trammels of conventional ex actitude" in their statements. .In plain English, they have assumed the privi lege of falsehood when it suited their purposes. This ie only too true, but they have usually deplored the neces sity for doing so and repented of the practice on their deathbeds. They al ways deny that they are Hare except when driven into a corner, and then they admit it only with shame and sor row. Nobody ever heard of a states man in this part of the world boasting that he employed falsehood or justify ing it when detected. "Q" goes on to say that high dignitaries in Europe openly permit themselves to associate with concubines, and nobody blames them for It. Their duties, he adds, are so onerous that they are rather expect ed to even up matters by vicious in dulgence; and- from this he strangely concludes that Mr. Roosevelt, if he does not keep a mistress in the White House, may at least solace himself by breaking hte word. It would never do for the American President to be wholly out of the fashion set by Euro pean Princes. Thus "Q" proves to his own satis-fac tion that Mr. Roosevelt might ignore his pledge not to seek another nomina tion . and still sit In the seat of the righteous. Sin is not sin when the sin ner is sufficiently rich or great. But, continues the ingenious writer, it would not be an actual breach of hie word if Mr. Roosevelt should accept another nomination because he pledged himself in the heat of generous enthusiasm. A man ought not to be bound by prom ises made in such a glow as one experl ences on inauguration day. We ought to give him time to think it all over and take it back in cold blood. A cynic might remark that this looks a good deal like what the vulgar call "playing the baby act." A man of honor will keep his word to his own harm and though reflection proves the promise unwise; but In Mr. Roosevelt's case the plea of undue enthusiasm Is inadmlssi me. He pledged himself originally, to be sure, in the heat of a great triumph, when all the gods seemed to have vied with one another to show him favor; but he has since reiterated it in cold blood, when it may be presumed that he was complete master of his reason and his emotions. To withdraw a promise made In great excitement is permissible repentance, perhaps; but to ignore the same promise after repeat ing it deliberately merits a harsher term than repentance. An uncompro mising moralist would call it perfidy. But our amazing casuist Is not yet done. He has two other arguments. The first is commonly used by bad boys on the playground when they want to "welch" on an agreement. "I didn't say I'd do it." 19 the classic formula. Mr. Roosevelt did not say when he would not again be a candidate. He certain ly did not mean it, for 1912 or 1916 therefore, "Q" concludes, he did not mean it for 1908. If this Is fooling it is admirable; if it Is meant seriously. It Is Machiavellianism run mad. Mr. Roose velt plainly meant that he would never be a candidate for a third term, and he gave his reason. He said that th wholesome and unalterable custom of the American people forbade it, and he told the truth. Were he to stand for a third term, the ineradicable conserva tism of the country" would be against him and would contribute to his defeat His pledge was universally received as an Indication of his moderation, sound statesmanship and love of his country. A breach of that pledge would be re ceived aa an Indication more or less conclusive of the opposite of all these things. . "Q's" final argument caps the climax. Because Mr. Roosevelt declined to be nominated for Vice-President and af terward accepted it, therefore he may with a good conscience break hie pledge not to accept the Presidency for a third term. This needs no comment. The cases are too unlike to admit of comparison. He shrank from the Vice- Preeidency in hte own apparent inter est. He pledged himself against a third term in the interest of his coun try. A man may sacrifice himself with credit; he may not sacrifice hie coun try to his ambition without reproach. FOURTH-STREET FRANCHISE. The ordinance to terminate the Southern Pacific permit, or franchise, on Fourth street should have passed the Council yesterday, even though it was introduced by Councilman Vaughn. The other Councilmen should have taken this step toward compelling the railroad to make proper return to the city for the use of the street, despite the possibility that Mr. Vaughn would have got a little glory out' of it. The Southern Pacific plans to hold possession of the street even after it shall have built another route into the city by way of Oswego; Mr. Fenton, at torney for the road, said this plainly to the Council. And the road insists that Its hold of the street is perpetual and cannot be revoked by the Council. Mr. Fenton said this also. The sooner this question shall be set tled in the courts the better for the people of Portland; they will then re gain control of what is their own the use of one of their main streets. The franchise is not perpetual, cannot be so; the Southern Pacific knows better, and so ought the Council. The people know better already. They will not be turned down by the Council, either; they have the power to revoke the franchise under the initiative and doubtless will avail themselves of it, Just as when they granted a new tele phone franchise more than a year ago, after the Council had turned one down. If the Southern Pacific is ever to be compelled to surrender its present franchise on Fourth street, it will never do so until after a fight in the courts. Then why should the Council wish to shun a fight In the courts, as was de clared by members of that body yester day, in explaining their opposition to the ordinance? The city has every thing to gain and nothing to lose from the contest; it has a City Attorney who receives regular salary for his service in representing the city in court. It Is absurd for members to argue, as they did yesterday, that passage of the ordinance would oust the railroad and deprive South Portland of rail connec tions. That was not the purpose of the ordinance; it was, instead, to put the railroad use of the thoroughfare under restrictions similar to those Im posed on the United Railways' use of Front street. The vote of 10 to 4 against the ordi nance represents the sentiment of the Council, but does not represent the Bentiment of the people, and its mem bers will find this out if they go before the people on the issue. The franchise, granted in 1S69, is out of date, and the city has outgrown it. Yet the company plans to use it for electric cars and to perpetuate indefinitely Its hold on the street. This is a valuable franchise too val uable for the people to allow in the possession of the railroad under the present easy conditions. This fact is self-evident, and no member of the Council can defend himself successfully against it; none did so yesterday in all the expenditure of oratory. It is taken for granted that the Southern Pacific intends to take its steam locomotives off the street; this is what It Is said to have promised, but the only guarantee is that Mr. Fenton and his associates "hope" and "expect' the railroad to have this done not that the railroad has ordered it done. This is a very Indefinite promise. It has been made before, often. It may be made again, just as often as proposals shall come up for the city's ousting the locomotives. The franchise should be revoked. The Council has the opportunity to do what the people want. It refuses. Yet the people can do for themselves under the Initiative next June what the Council has refused to do for them. CARRYING COALS TO NEWCASTLE. Ten millions in geld will reach New York today on the Cunard liner Car- mania, due from Europe, and the tight money market which New York has been experiencing is expected to relax. The New York dispatch announcing the coming of the Carmania, with her vast amount of treasure, states that the gold was imported by the banks in view of the recent money stringency in New York, and that "the transactions were facilitated by the Treasury De partment,' which advanced most of the cash used, so that the banks would not lose interest on their money while the gold was en route." It is this prac tice by the Treasury Department of ad vancing money to the New York banks when they run short that Is causing no end of criticism in different parts of the country. There is stored away in the vaults' at Washington the larg est individual supply of gold that can be found anywhere on earth, and the Secretary of the Treasury, as custodian of this vast sum, frequently engages in the pastime of relieving a money strin gency by sending out a few millions to banks which are unwilling to lose the interest on supplies which they are forced to import from Europe, as in the case of the Carmania shipment. The present money stringency in New York was caused by an epidemic of speculation which always follows or ac companies such extraordinary "coups" as Harriman has just "pulled off." The Wall-street gamblers were so anxious to plunge on the market that they paid exorbitant rates of interest for call money and drew out reserves to such an extent that there was not enough left for legitimate operations. The ten slon was tightened at this time on ac count of the banks in the Middle West and Northwest, which usualy have large sums lying Idle In the New York banks, drawing them out for crop-moving purposes. This required the banks which had been staking the gamblers to import gold from Europe, and, pend ing the arrival of that gold, the cus tomary call was made on the Secretary of the Treasury for the loan of a few millions to tide over the emergency until the European gold began flow ing in. The present situation offers a good illustration as to why the bidding on 2 per cent Panama Canal bonds was so active. A 2 per cent income from a bond i not attractive, especially when a high premium Is paid for that bond but when It can be put up as collateral for gold which is tendered free of in terest charge, it becomes a highly val- uable possession, especially in a money stringency. Perhaps the most amusing incident in connection with this peculiar finan cial policy of Secretary Shaw was a "warning" which he Issued to the bankers, in which he stated that, while he acknowledged "the legal right of any bank to loan money at appropriate rates of interest at home or abroad, on ample security, even .with tne Knowl edge that it is being used for specu lative purposes," he is not willing that "Government money snail De enucea away from the locality where It has been deposited for the purpose of being used in this way." The banks, of course, oDeyea tne mandate of the Secretary to the letter, but the manner in which their reserves were depleted and call money rates went soaring would indicate tnat, wniie they loaned the Government gold lor strictly legitimate purposes, they passed the remainder of their slender reserves over the counter to the 40-percent call-money speculators, who were desirous of taking advantage oU the rampant stock market. The system is an admirable one for the favored bank ers, who secure the Treasury gold free of interest, but it is fraught with a certain degree of risk, and is -hardly tn h commended If the Secretary were really desirous of checking wild speculation and obviating the need of gold Imports, except in exchange ior goods, he might ease up on his Sub treasury liberality. , WASHINGTON'S COLUMBIA RIVER. The Seattle Post-Intelligencer on Tuesday editorially commented with exceptional fairness on the Lower Co lumbia improvements. The .- editorial was marred only by an imperfect un derstanding of the situation, this ig norance of the subject being reflected in the advice that Portland would "bet ter get in and dig the jetty as Seattle is getting in to dig the canal." The Se attle paper says: The State of Washington is as much inter ested In one side of the Columbia River as the State of Oregon Is in the other, especially as Vancouver and other points on the north bank give promise of rivaling any Oregon seaports. The interests of the whole State of Washing ton call for the improvement of the mouth of the Columbia River with as much warmth, perhaps, as the people of Oregon do, although perhaps the . people of this state are not so noisy or so unreasonable in their efforts. Admission from as. Puget Sound paper that the State of Washington is as much interested in one side of the Co lumbia River as Oregon is in the other side is a noteworthy departure from any previous comment from Puget Sound sources. It i3 accordingly the plain duty of Washington to get In and do as much for herslde of the Co lumbia River . as Oregon has done. That the P.-0. hs In ignorance of the extent of Portland's and Oregon's ef forts in this direction Is shown in the suggestion that "if the Oregonlans would do more for themselves and holler less for Uncle Sam to come to their assistance, they would probably accomplish results of greater benefit to their community. It may interest the Post-Intelligencer to learn that Portland not Oregon, just Portland has already expended nearly $2,000,000 in improving the Lower Columbia and Willamette Rivers, and of this great sum nearly four-fifths was expended on the Washington side of the river, the obstructions removed from Willow Bar. St. Helens, Martin's Island, Walker's Island and Pillar Rock being far more expensive than those from any. other part of the channel. Portland has for years borne all this heavy expense uncomplainingly, and will continue to keep the channel open for Washington as well as Oregon ports; but we do not feel that we are asking anything unreasonable when we solicit some assistance from the state which is sharing with us in the benefits of the open river. It is not alone on the Lower Colum bia that the Oregonlans have spent their money In an effort to cheapen and facilitate the movement of Wash ington as well as Oregon products; for only about a year ago we completed a portage railroad on the Upper Colum bia at a cost of about $300,000, not one dollar of which was contributed by Waehington or by the Government. This road is now moving considerable wheat, and every bushel of the wheat is coming out of the State of Wash ington. The Columbia for a long dis tance skirts a portion of the State of Washington, which prior to the build ing of the Oregon portage road had no other access to market except by way of a long haul to the Northern 'Pacific Railroad. The wheat of this region is now com ing down to the bank of the Columbia River by an economical wagon haul, and thence Into Portland at a much lower rate than was obtainable before the portage road was completed. The Oregon wheatgrowers, having railroad facilities superior, to those enjoyed by the farmers on the north bank of the Columbia River, have as yet made no use of the portage railroad, but have contributed taxes for supplying the Washington farmers with an open river route to market. It is pleasing indeed, even at this late day, to find that the importance of the Columbia River as a commercial asset to the State of Washington is beginning to be appreciated by the people of that state. MR. HEARST'S BRIGHT PROSPECTS. The primary elections in New York County have thrown the control of the Republican State Convention to the Higgins faction. Among the Demo crats the followers of Murphy wrested victory from those of McClellan. Whether Higgins will demand a re nomination seems uncertain. He can have it if he desires, but his chance for re-election Is not the best and he may take counsel of discretion and retire before the storm breaks. The New York World calls ' him a jellyfish and the Saturday Evening Post had a witty description of him not long ago which left much the same Impression with the reader. It is common talk that hisi re nomination would throw thousands of rural Republican votes to Hearst. Hearst not only has the loyal support of the Independence League, but Mur phy's triumph makes him a promising candidate before the Democratic con vention also. The New York World and other safe and sane Democratic papers, like the Brooklyn Eagle, prefer Jerome or anybody else to Hearst, but the masses of the party are not safe and sane. The World admits with some reluctance that Hearst is likely to retain much of "the great strength which he developed last Fall," that he will make a strong campaign, make a telling appeal to the electorate and re ceive a heavy vote. The World does not like to confess this, but It loves truth more than it hates Hearst, and it hates Bryan worse than the untrammeled editor of the American. It is sad to see a great newspaper in such a tragic dilemma. One cannot help fancying how happy the safe and sane Democratic press would be were Bryan and Hearst both removed to a better world. Democratic principles are so good; Democratic can didates so bad; and the Democratic voters so perverse. The World will not admit that Hearst owes a particle of his strength to the municipal owner ship, idea. It all comes, says that illu minated newspaper, from his opposition to the bosses and the trusts. Perhaps It does. At any rate, it would not do to admit that municipal ownership the ories could strengthen -Hearst; because. if they could, one must admit that they willalso strengthen Bryan, and that would be inconceivable. Nothing can strengthen Bryan In the eyes of the safe and sane Democracy. If the World and its Democratic con temporaries are preparing their souls for a flop to Hearst, it is not difficult to guess the reason. Anything to dimin ish the overgrown prestige of the per fidious and unmanageable Nebraskan. Hearst can never be President, but once Governor of New York he may be able to split the party and put Bryan's election out of the question. Mr. Lytle finds about the same num ber of roads heading for Tillamook that he found heading for Central Oregon when he began building the Columbia Southern a good many years ago. In the case of Central Oregon his was the only road that became enough of an actuality to enable the people of the isolated region it tapped to ship their products to market With the Tilla mook road Mr. Lytle has made suffi cient progress to have nearly twenty miles in operation and abundant funds at his disposal for completing the re mainder. Some of the other projects which are mapped out for Tillamook possess real merit, but if the past is a good criterion for the future, it would not be an unsafe prediction that the first road into the rich Tillamook coun try will be that which Is being pushed by the Central Oregon railroad-builder, who does not believe in paper rail roads. There is no offense against the public more grave than that of polluting the waters of its rivers and harbors. Rec ognizing this fact, municipal bodies and states authorities combine in war fare upon offenders of this class, ap plying upon occasion such penalties for the offense as the law provides. It has been found that the Portland Gas Com pany is a grievous offender in this line the river bed and bank at the foot of Flanders street being polluted for some distance up and down with 'the foul residue of crude petroleum that Is al lowed to exude through the company's pipes into the river. The skipper who causes foul-smelling bilge-water to toe pumped from the hold of his vessel into the river is very properly haled before the court and fined. Let us see what will be done with this resident offender whose offense is incomparably greater. The new distance tariff, which the Washington Railroad Commission will attempt to enforce, makes an average reduction, of about 20 per cent in freight rates. The commission has .fixed all of the new rates under the tariff at the maximum, and consider ately gives the railroads the right t6 make the rates as much lower as they choose. The railroads have not yet an nounced their intention regarding the new rates, but, as they are questioning the legality of the commission's act in ordering in a joint freight rate, they will hardly acknowledge the right of the commission to make such a drastic reduction. The principal contention of the railroads In the commission matter is that the commission in fixing rates is usurping the powers of the Legisla ture. The Seattle Poet-Intelligencer criti cises the compiler of the Government daily consular reports because that publication fathered the statement that Portland is the greatest lumber ship ping port in the world. The Inference drawn from the P.-I. criticism is that there is a greater lumber shipping port than Portland. If the Seattle paper will kindly state the location of the port which cuts and ships more lum ber than is cut and shipped at Port land, It will present a matter of real news. Before beginning its research it would be well for the Seattle authority to bear In mind that there are no two ports on Puget Sound which ship as much lumber as is shipped from Port land, v . The Czar is being subjected to con siderable criticism because he failed to attend the funeral of Trepoff. As it was a wise precaution against provid ing the subject for another funeral which prevented the ruler of the Rus sias from being present, his absence will be excused by unbiased people liv ing at long range from the scene. Mr. Bailey, of TexaB, first attracted the attention of the country by kick ing inthe doors of the House of Repre sentatives. From the present trend of events there is a reasonable possibility hat he will lose that attention by be ting kicked out of the Democratic party. Having consulted the well-informed newspaper oracles in advance, the peo ple of Havana were fully prepared for the visit of a large dark man with an expansive smile, a strong will and an overwhelming desire to grab a Cuban or two and knock their heads together. Dr. Hill complains that during his eleven strenuous years in Portland the newspapers had no kind words for him. Not even when he is going. Yet it isn't too late for a few bright and glowing coals of fire. John L. Sullivan luckily escaped an untimely end at the Cimarron disaster because he wasn't on the train. Doubt less he had a "hunch." Mr. Sullivan wasn't born to be drowned in water. President Roosevelt desires the Cu bans to understand that he is going to have -peace in Cuba if he has to fight for it. The Cubans didn't know that the intervention was loaded. Three Shamrocks have been beaten and Sir Thomas Llpton Is going to add another to the collection. Which shows what queer delusions a long course of breakfast tea will Induce. Mr. Bryan continues to find new rea sons why he was defeated In 1896. It wasn't silver, he said, but his views on arbitration of labor troubles. "But he never blamed the booze." Having given up East Third street. the Harriman management might go itself one better by surrendering West Fourth. Several American vessels are again in Havana harbor on a peaceful errand But we remember the Maine DOING IT 1ST THE OHIO WAV.. The "Indorsement" of the President and the Two Senator. New York Tribune (Rep.) Out in Ohio they still believe that Eu clid was wrong when he said that it was impossible to square a circle. There were geometricians in evidence at Columbus on Wednesday who could not only square circle, but could make two rigid par allel straight lines meet, cross and inter twine themselves like the strands of a wire cable. These experts proved of in valuable service to the Republican state convention, which wanted to cover a mul titude of opinions with the blanket of charity and to distribute a grist of com pliments where they would do the great est good to the greatest number. The issue before the convention was simple. Something had to be said in the platform on National questions, and it happened that on two important meas ures one or other of the Ohio Sena tors had been conspicuously at variance with President Roosevelt. Senator For- aker stoutly opposed the President's rail road rate regulation programme and was the only Republican Senator to vote against the Hepburn bill. His vote was given, too, in disregard of a formal re quest to support it sent him by the Ohio Legislature. Senator Dick's vote helped to strangle the Philippines tariff bill in committee preventing action on it at the last session in response to the urgent representations of President Roosevelt and Secretary Taft. It was evident that the Ohio Republicans could not logically indorse In the same breath the adminis tration's legislative programme and the votes by which the Ohio Senators had thwarted that programme, or attempted to thwart it- Representative Theodore E. Burton raised this issue a month ago, when it was proposed to pass an omni bus resolution of indorsement, and Ohio has been actively debating the question ever since. The two Senators were naturally averse to the idea of the convention's express ing any preference whiah might be inter preted as a rebuke to them, and, join ing forces, they eventually succeeded in preventing a direct test of party opinion on rate regulation and the- Philippine tar iff. They did not challenge in terms any of the President's acts or policies. But after indorsing him in the strongest terms and declaring explicitly that "to him belongs the principal credit for the long list of beneficent laws enacted at the last session of Congress, and we are proud of his leadership and pledge him our loyal support in the future as in the past," and the platform-maKers added this postcrlpt: "We most heartily and without reserve approve and Indorse our distinguished Senators, Joseph Benson Foraker and Charles Dick.'.' Just how much this means, no one knows, but it seems equivalent to pledging to the Pres ident Ohio's loyal support in the Sen ate and then commending the two Sena tors for withholding that support when ever and to whatever extent they fit. Probable Loss of Ohio. New York Press (Rep.) There could be no more impressive example of the dire consequences to par ties of the politican system by which bosses are maintained than the situa tion in Ohio. The Ohio that gave Mc- Kinley 49,000 plurality in 1896 and 69,000 in 1900 and that gave Roosevelt 255,000 in 1904, is as good as gone to- the Demo cratic party. For this the Republicans of Ohio and of the country have to thank Senators Foraker and Dick, the bosses of the state machine. Those able servants of the corporations have defied the public opinion not only of the Nation but of their own state- something far more serious from the point of view of practical politics, for the voters of the Nation cannot get at a Foraker or a Dick, while those of Ohio can. They have acted as if the in crease, of Ohio's 49,000 plurality for Mc- Kinley to 255.000 for Roosevelt had been a vote of confidence in the Senators. Of course, they did not fool themselves. They knew that the stupendous plurality was in favor of the Roosevelt programme, But In the Senate the Ohio Dromios did all that was In their power to defeat the Roosevelt programme; did everything that the corporations could wish to con firm their restraint of trade. Old-Tlme Chattcry Visit No More, Brooklyn Eagle. Here, for instance, is a thing that would be regarded as curious by our grandmothers, if they were alive to know it; calling and visiting are going out of "fashion." Ministers and doc tors make calls, but of a professional character, and when a foreign shin arrives in our harbor its captain must exchange calls with the commandant of the Navy-Yard, but that is profes sional, too. The old habit of running into a neighbor's house and chattering about the weather, and the neighbor's clothes, and the doings of the Smiths and the iniquity of the Jones chil dren. whenever there was a lull in the washing and dress-making is in de cline, however, and it is no longer proper to go and live on our cousins In the country for more than a month, in the supposition that this visitation is a visit. One Smith Tired of Being; Smith, Milwaukee Dispatch in New York Times Because he thought that there were at ready too many persons bearing the name of Smith, Ernest Bradford bmith, a pro fessor in the University of Pennsylvania, had his name changed to Ernest Smith Bradford Just before his marriage to Miss Florence B. Mott, daughter of Judge A B. Mott, of Neenah, Wis. Both bride and bridegroom are delighted with their change of names. Bells Poe Never Heard Belfast (Ireland) Gazette. Hear the teleohonlc bells Nickel-plated bells. What a nervous agitation In their petulancy dwells; How our tempers they excite. Through the day or In the night. As we hear the operator's shouts and yells! "Hello!" he says, "hell-o!" And we wieh he'd thither go, - For no tomcat caterwauling to such helpless wrath Impels: And everybody knows By the bawling And the calling How the conversation flows. As his thoughts into the instrument repeatedly he tells As his thoughts with maledictions he contin ually tells Tells, tells, tells. And again he rings the bells. Rut some fellow at the other end Is disin clined to go. So once more he instils Some hyph-ened syl-la-bles, Like a jackdaw In a panic. And with vigor quite satanic. It is wrong to tear your hair. And worse, they say, to swear By this or that or here or there or any other where; But that was said Before were made Those palpitating, fast-vibrating telephonic bells. Bells, bells, bells, bells. And the yells, yells, yells. Of the speakers and the hearers at those bells. MRS. HUMPHREY WARD MAY VISIT Her Famous Uncle's American Lecture Tour Was a Frost. London Cable Disptach in New York World. Mrs. Humphrey Ward is making plans for her long-expected visit to the United States this Autumn or Winter. But she has not made up her mind to accept any of the offers made to her by the lecture- bureau men. Her uncle, Matthew Arnold, looked upon his American lecture tour" as the stupendous blunder of his career. He considered that his ' literary reputation lost prestige by the disgraceful and be littling tone the newspapers adopted to ward him. Arnold went over In rather a high and mighty way, and acted as if it were a condescension to allow the American people to pay their good money to look at him. When the local managers raved at his inarticulate delivery, and the re porters poked fun at his monocle, he said some foolish things about the un cultured Americans who didn't know enough to appreciate the profession of poetry at Oxford University, and came home In great disgust. Mrs. Ward is probably the most pains taking and hard-working novelist to be found. She won her present pre-eminent place In the world of letters by concen tration and patient labor, which are stupendous. No prima donna guards her reputation more passionately than Mrs. Ward does hers. Every public ap pearance is planned with the same care ful thought arid Judgment given by great operatic stars, who know that if they sing half a dozen times out of tune it may condemn them for a lifetime. Strangely enough, Matthew Arnold never had any faith in his niece's novel- istlc powers. "Poor Mary, she can never write a novel," he was In the habit of say ing. "Why doesn't she stick to the es say?" But in spite of this lack of faith, he influenced her tremendously. ahe has accepted as law and gospel his statements about the vulgarity of Ameri cans, their inability to understand the best literature and the personality of the best writers of England. At Mrs. Ward's extremely exclusive dinner parties and teas one almost never meets an American, unless it be Henry James or Sargent and men like them, who already are lions In aristocratic cir cles. It would be hard to find a seasoned reporter in all London who would have the temerity to ring her door-bell and ask for an interview offhand. Advice for the County Fair Season. Buffalo (N. Y.) Express. Don't urge the other visitors to the fair to patronize the shell game. They may not know enough to refuse. Don't risk all your wad on the bob tailed nag. The bay may have a show. Don't make sport of the blue rib bon. It's a serious matter with some folks. Don't wink when you call for a lem onade. Ask boldly for what you want. Don't look pained when some one at the track makes a remark about the human race. This is an old and honored- feature of the fair. Don't get gay with the Constable if you meet one of the stage variety. He may not be able to see the joke. Don't try to evade the politician. No use. Don't ask the exhibitor if the incu bator can cluck like a hen. He has heard the question before. Don't throw refuse on the grass. Be different from the other people. Don't ask the farmers if farming pays. None of them will admit it. Don't serve as a judge in the baby show. The insurance companies will cancel your policies. Don't plan to go home on the last car. It is sure to be overloaded or annulled. Don't lift the fruit exhibits. If you are hungry, go buy. Don't expect to get a good cigar when you throw the ball at the kinky head in the hole in the curtain. You may not hit it. Don't compel the children to traipse along with you all the time. Perhaps they can have more fun alone. Don't fail to carry your luncheon in a shoe box. It makes the day so much pleasanter for the men who sell sand wiches and coffee. Half Million to Wins; Consumption. Boston Herald. M. Montefiore Levi, of Brussels, for merly a member of the Belgian Senate and president of the Association for En gineers, has bequeathed over $500,000 to be used In the prevention of consump tion. Voters will Attend to Willy-urn. New York Herald. What will Upton Sinclair Oo if Wil liam Jennings Bryan copyrights "The Bungle"? A Spoiled Story. J. D. Benedict In St. Nicholas. Young Tommy was a reckless chap As ever you did spy: . He crept Into the pantry ones And ate a pot of lye No. no! 1 mean a' lot of pie. The pie did not agree with Tom, So very large a piece. He felt so 111 he hastened off To find a pot of grease Dear me! I mean a grot of peace. He wept with pain and doubled up As tight as any clam. "Oh dear! I feel as bad as when I ate that Jot of lamb No, no! I mean that lot of Jam." This story gets so mixed at times Under my very eyes, I'll stop. So far what I have said Seems like a lack of pies Dear me! I mean a pack of lies. WHO'S T1Ux if (wlSETTol 11 BUFFALO- 1 ll FRENCH ARE THRIFTY SAVERS. Have Eighteen Billion Dollars Invested In Securities. Alfred Neymarck, a French statistician, has recently made a computation of the amount of the savings of the people of France that have been Invested in differ ent values in the shape of bonds. He calculates that from 1SS5 to 1905 the deposits In the great banks of France in creased from 912,000,000 francs, equal to $182,400,000 counting live francs to the dol lar, to 897,000,000 francs, or $579,400,000. The deposits in the Bank of France dur ing the same period increased from 358, 000.000 francs, or $71,600,000, to 823,000.1X0 francs, or $164,600,000. The value of bonds deposited in the banks increased from 3.113,000,000 to 6,930.000,000 francs ($022,600.- 000 to $1,386,000,000). The six great rail road companies of France sold 9,482.465 francs ($1,896,493) bonds out of a capital of 4,016,300,000 francs,$803,200.00) and can celed on their old and new loans 2,164,000, 000 francs ($432,800,000) From 18S0 to 1905 the depositors in the savings banks have subscribed and paid for 4.200,000,000 francs ($840,000,0uu) govern ment bonds. The limit that each person can deposit in the savings banks in France is $300. The interest on this sum. If not drawn. Is invested by the bank In government bonds. From 1891 to 1903 the same class subscribed for and held 520. 000,000 francs ($104,000,000) of bonds issued by the French colonies and protectorates, 948,000,000 francs ($189,600,000) of City of Paris bonds, and 925.000.000 francs ($185. 000,000) of local communal and in mort gage and loan companies. From 1SS5 to 1905 the deposits In the peoples' savings banks increased from 2.211,000,000 to 3,210.000,000 francs ($442,200. 000 to $642,000,0, that is to say, an in crease of 1 milliard ($200,000,000), counting five francs to the dollar. During the same period the number of depositors Increased from 4,900,000 to 7.000,000, and the posses sion of the mutual relief societies in creased from 56,000.000 to 160.000,000 francs ($11,200,000 to $32,000,000). The aggregate value of the stocks, bonds, and similar securities belonging to B'rench capitalists is estimated by Mr. Neymarck to have been at the end of the year 1905, 93.000,000. 000 francs ($18,600,000,000). S7,0o,000,000 francs $17.4O0,O0O.0CO3 in 1900, and 74.000,000,01)0 francs ($14,800,000,000) in 1890. "OwaeMhip" Bryan for 1012. New York Sun. It is all very well for W. J. B., mounted on the swayback Democratic Ass, to flay that faitnful beast into a gallop and call back to those who have given him a les up that he Is going where he listeth, but has he thought of Colonel Mose Wetmore and his lasso? While paying tribute to his friend Bryan as "the keenest thinker, the most forceful individuality and altogether the grandest type of American manhood In the world today," the Colonel rejects the Government railroad notion explosively and wltii undisguised scorn. "I can't see," he says, "why in the name of all damnation the Government needs to own the railroads In order to regulate them." Overlooking the means provided by Con gress In the Hepburn law to regulateUie railroads, and regarding the '"break" of his friend Bryan indulgently. Colonel Mose calls thunderously for the election of a Democratic President and Congress to smash the trusts. "By the great horn spoon," he says, "I know a man like Bryan could do the work." If Mr. Bryan thinks that he can get a Government-ownership plank Into his own platform he reckons without the restraining and corrective influence of the St. Louis tobacco statesman. When the leading question was asked of Colonel Mose, "Do you think Government owner ship will be a plank in the platform?" he replied, heatedly: 'No, I don't! We must see that It is kept out, and I don't be lieve Mr. Bryan will press the matter." As W. J. B.'s Grand Vizier, Colonel Mose ought to know what he Is talking about. Perhaps "the keenest thinker" may consent to hold Government own ership In reserve until he makes his fourth run for President In 1912. Former Mill Girl Now Factory Owner. Boston Herald. Miss Elizabeth E. Bolt, of Wakefield, Mass., who was once a mill girl, started a factory on a small scale and now em ploys over 400 men and women, who turn out about 600 dozen pairs of stockings daily. "Teddy" Leads In New York Dogs. Boston Post. Of all the names given to male dogs in New York City, "Teddy" now leads the list in point of numbers. If You Were a Boy. Catholic Standard. If you were a boy this morning. I wonder what you would do? Was ever a day more perfect. Was ever the sky more blue? I'm speaking to you, grave senior. I noticed you as you went Hot-footing it Into the city, .To add to your cent, per cent. I noticed your sober manner. Your very important looks. And I noticed your boy beside you. The schoolboy with his books. 1 5a w and you saw where the river Sweeps down to the "swlmmin' hole." Another boy playing ''hookey" A boy with a fishing pole. If you were a boy this mornlnr, .. I wonder what you would do? 1 saw you stooping to whisper A word to the boy with you. It seemed to me then you told hlra That the truant boy was a fool, That nothing ripens manhood Like the moments spent in school. With the fresh blue sky above you And the green fields under it. How dare you utter such nonsen6ef Oh! liar and hypocrite! If you were a boy this morning. A boy with a heart and soul. You'd be, in spite of a licking. The boy with the .flshlng-pole. AFRAID ? From the New York Press.