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THE NEW AGE, PORTLAND, OREGON.
e
Wapy r
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Difficult Digestion
That Is dyspepsia. ' ,
It makes life miserable.
Its Buflercrs eat not because the umnt to,
but simply because they mutt.
They krfbw thcy,are. Irritable and fretful ?
but they cannot be otherwise.
They complain of, a bad tasto In the
mouth, a tenderness at the pit of the stom
ach, an uneasy feeling of puffy fulness,
headache, heartburn and what not.
The effectual remedy, proved by perma
nent cures oi'uiousancis or severo cases, Is
kUkcience
regeflTvenfionl
An Austrlnn material for preventing
the Tlslng of dust oil sweeping proves
to bo cottonseed oil. lu a teat at Vi
enna, It was found that floors oiled
twice .a year could bo Bwept weekly
ww f ri ,gt j wuuout any wuimng or tue uust, nuu
UOOCl S iiarSUparUia ,tho material was recommended for nil
Jioon'a 1'ills tre the beit cathartic.
Provti llli Htrolim.
"Did you oay," asked tho author's
friend, "that your hero, who is poor, is
to marry tho rich heiress"
"Yob, that is tho way ho proves his
heroism.' Indianapolis Nows.
Hamlin's Wizard Oil is a good medi
cino; pain and suffering cannot abide
whii it; yqur druggist will tell you so.
Reasonable Inference.
"Did the ovlilenco in that divorce
suit indicato that Mrs. Flash was gid
dy" "t guess so. Tho Judge and five of
tho jurors wanted to marry her."
Brooklyn Life.
CRTS Prtnnntlr Curwj Ko II ti r nerToutoon
X'f9 inT n"!.fe,.,.,'rof '"" KHB'i Orf t Nem
JUitorar. tend lor FllBUt)-.j.MUUI hottlattul trait
In. Da.lt.ll Kuki.LW..W1I ArchSt.PUUd.lphlt.P
Point of View.
Now England Btntosman Wasn't
that a mortifying scone in tho senate
chamber?
Statesman from tho Breezy West
Mortifying! . It was disgusting.. It was
topped before wo could tell which ono
was tho best man! Chicago Tribuno.
CASTOR I A
For Infants and Children.
Tin Kind You Have Always Bought
CZ&tfZtfk
Bears tho
Slgnaturo o
The Standard BuiheL
Tho Winchester bushel, which is tho
standard for tho Unitod States, con
tains 2,150.42 cubic inches.
Who's Your Grocer?
If ho doesn't handle Monopolo8pices
he ought to. If you want to try thorn,
send us his namo and address with two
2-cent statpps for postngo and we will
end vou a 10 cent tin of Monopolo
Cayenno or Ginger or White loppor or
other variety. We know you'll say it
is tho finest you ever used Send at
once to Wadhama & Kerr Bros., Fort
land, Oregon.
Cut Off.
"I went to the play last night."
"How did you like it?"
"I didn't hear it. I sat In front'of
two women who wero talking about
wedding." '
Mothers will find Mrs. Wlnslow's Booth,
itr Syrup the best remedy to use for their
illdren during tho teething period.
to
The Sure Way.
"How dnro you sond a collector
my house7"
"To toll tho trtith, sir, wo wero a lit
tle doubtful about you."
"Then why not-hnvo mo looked up?
You would then huvo known that I
nover pay my bills." Lifo. .
rooms receiving mnny persons, as well
ns for laboratories, libraries aud otjior
places to bo kept scrupulously dust
, free.
By regulating the -food of a milch
cow.'M. Spolverlnl claims to have mailo
Its milk a satisfactory substitute for
human milk. Tho Urst experiments
were mhde on n goat by feeding It with
eggs or a little meat In addition to
the regular food, and Inter on another
goat was fed with sprouting grains of
barley. In each case tho goat's mill:
was changed to thechemlcul composi
tion of humnn milk' '
In acknowledging an anonymous gift
(Df $20,000 to the Harvard College Ob
servatory, l'ror. u. o. Plckerlug an
nounces that tho money will be used
for the preservation and study of the
astronomical photographs made under
the auspices of the observatory. "These
photographs," says Prof. Pickering,
"furnish a history of tho cntlro stellar
universe for the last twelve years
which Is not duplicated elsewhere." A
new building for the storngo of these
precious documents Is needed, and
money Is required to pay the expense
of having them carefully Inspected for
yet undiscovered objects of Interest.
f Thus the anonymous gift comes very
opportunely. .
That It may have the cntlro Held to
Itself aud escape the keen competition
of hosts of tropical relatives for the
nectar aud minute Insect's In tho deep
tubed brilliant flowers that plcaso him
best, that Jeweled atom, tho ruby
'throated bumming bird, sole represent
ative of his family cast of the Missis
sippi, travels 'front Central America or
beyond to Labrador aud back ugnln
every summer of Its Incessantly active
llttlo life. Think what the Journey
from Yucatan even to New England
must menu for a crcaturo so tiny that
Its outstretched wings measure bare
ly two Inches across! It Is tho small
est bird wo have. Wherein lodges the
forco that propels It through tho sky
at a speed and a height which takes
It Instantly beyond the range of human
vision? says Ncltjo Blanchan, In tho
Ladles' Home Journal.
One of the difficulties hitherto en
countered by explorers among tho gl-
gnntlc monuments of hnclcnt Egypt Is
tho lack of sufficient light In the hurled
chambers and long passages of pyra
mids, tombs and temples. Recently
this difficulty In the exploration of the
great temple of Karnak ha been
laigely overcomo by Prof. 'Maspero
through the Introduction of electric
lamps. The' pyramids also arc to be
lighted with electricity, their myste
rious chambers and passageways pene
trating the Interior of tho vast struc
tures will bo more easily traversed,
aud Interesting discoveries may result.
Unless wo learn to avoid wasto In
tho uso of coal, says Prof. John Perry,
tho world, In a hundred years or fo,
will resemble a spendthrift who has
run through his patrimony. What Is
needed Is somo form of engine to con
vert, as directly and cheaply as possi
ble, tho energy of con) Into electric
energy. Scleuco, be belloves, la capa
ble of achieving tho desired result, but
"That'll be .about all o' that," ha
f)roki out, with a grin. "I know what
you'd like to have me go to a Trap
pint monastery or to the Old Man's
Home until your mother happens to
come around enough to enable you to
keep your binoculars on me every tnlu
ute of the day or night. Or you'd like
to navo mo surrender myself for n vug.
and tnko a turn over on the Eastern
Branch until you'ro In shape to accom
pany me. But the hotel In Atlantic's
gpod enough for mc, thanks. There
can't be nny too many girls, chessy
cats or otherwise, In any seashore Ho
tel, for mo, nnd If they wero lu tho
ratio of 4.000.000 to 1 the better it 'ud
tickle me. I'm sorry your mother Is
Blck, and nil that, of course, but I'm
not 112 years of age yet. and the
schedule for my vacation as arranged
Is going through, on' the dot, so. Tar ns
I m concerned, nnd there nlu't going
to be any solitary conUuemcut stunts
In It. at that."
Then the brute nccompnnlcd her over
to Baltimore, and went biking off to
Atlantic City nnd the cliessy cats, leav
ing her sulky and suspicious. Wash
ington Post.
Don't Oat JFootsorat Oat Toot-Easa.
It It certain cure for sweating-, callous and
hot. tired. Arhlnv feM. UtkM nnw nr tlvht
shoes easy. Try it today. Bold by all DruigUt. only through united effort, supported
Irtce25c. Don't accept a substitute. Bam pie ,, ,.. a.i,i I .... A.... .
sent fbbe. AddreM Allen B. Olmitod, IKo7 , "J lar capital. Ho suggests that If
tho expenditure of 5.000,000 a year
A WiaoVall.
"You say hie money fell to him?"
"No, he fell to it tumbled through
coal hole and sued tho city." Chi
cago Herald.
CANCER
Sufferer from this horrible) malady
aearly alwaya inherit it sot necesurilv
from the parents, but may b from some'
remote ancestor, tor waacer often rum
through 6c vera! generations. This deadly
poison may lay dormant in the blood foe
jean, or until you reach middle life, then
the first little sore or ulcer makes its ap
pearanceor a swollen gland in the
breast, or some other part of the body,
give the first warning.
To-cure Cancer thoroughly and perma
ently all the poisonous virus must be
eliminated from the blood every vestagc
of it driven out. Thi S. S. S. does, ami
to the only medicine that cap reach deep- n case her mother Illness proved not
C.KU, vuouuaiB yww uuuimcb iikwu, to DB serious.
were entrusted for two or threo years
to such men as Lord Kelvin or Lord
Raylclgb, tho problem might be solv
ed.
WIFE8 PLEA N VAIN.
V ,
Brutal Hueband Wasted No Bolltude
on Ilia Vacation.
Last Saturday, tho very day on which
a certain young Treasury clerk wua
to start away with his wife on the
annual leave, tho wife received a tele
gram from, one of her sisters, announc
ing the sudden Illness of their mother
lu Baltimore. It was, of course, de
cided that tbo wife would have to go
to her mother's bedside, and as the
Treasury clerk had had his leave grant
ed all In duo course, and as the other
clerks bad their leave schedule all fix
ed out, be couldn't see any way for
It except to start off on the prearrang
ed trip to Atlantic City by himself,
With hla wife to follow along later on
OLD PROVERB'8 REAL MEANING.
Colda to He Cured by Fasting, Heating,
Dieting) nnd Mglit.
Long ago Sydenham said thnt disease
was an effort of nature to restore
health. But we(do not treat a cold as
If It were of this. character; we regard
It usually as a thing to be stopped
rather than to be helped along gently
In Its own direction. That Is a wrong
policy altogether.
There Is an old proverb, "Peed a
cold nnd starve a fever." This has led
many people to take a heavy meal
when a cold Is on them, nnd such a
heavy mcul .may have so stimulating
an effect upon the system thnt the sys
tem will be put Into working order for
a short time, nnd then mny be able to
go on by Itself. But the orlglnnl prov
erb was not a command. The first
part of It was a condition. If you feed
a cold you will hnve to'stnrvo a fovcr
later on. That was tho real sense, and
tho real advice conveyed by It was
"starve a cold."
This gives us tho best or at least the
most economical means of prevention
nnd cure. When wo have n cold tho
balance of nature has somehow been
upset. Tho cold generally starts from
the stomach. Give the stomach a rest
fast for a day or two, or for several
days-nnd probably the cold Itself will
disappear.
The next means Is light. It Is prob
able thnt If the whole body were al
lowed sufficient light, colds would be
unknown. Dr. Porbes Wlnslow and
Sir James Wyllo, Into physician to tho
Emperor of' Russia, and many other
physicians, nil emphasize the Import
ance of light. Tho Irtst of these au
thorities calculated tho effects of light
In the St. Petersburg hospitals. lie
found that, tho number of patients
cured In rooms which wero properly
lighted was three times greater than
tho number cured In dark rooms.
Even slow eating aud mastication of
food might by Itselr bo sulllclent to
prevent any cold; even deep, slow, full
brcnthlug through the nose might bo
sufficient; even cleansing, followed by
Invigorating water treatments, with
rubbings nnd exercise, might bo suffi
cient; in fact, there are numerous ave
nues to Immunity. We must never Im
nglne, writes Eustaco Mills In the
Morning Oregonlnn, that the draught
or tho wet feet can ever be by them
selves tho real and vital cause.
CHINE8E BARBER'8 METHODS.
Complications Which lleact the Celes
tial Hairdresser.
New York's Chinatown has now two
bnrbcrs, and the monopoly once en
Joyed by Lee Yu of Mott street Is at
an cud, unless he forms n syndicate
with tho nen comer who has n shop In
Pell Bt His trade Is more complicated
than that of his "forelgu-devll" col
league, and demands a longer appren
ticeship, lie shaves with a smaller
razor, aud for a shaving brush uses
what looks suspiciously like n cheap
tooth-brush. Iu lathering, he applies a
small daub of soapsuds which covers
about one square Inch. When this Is
shaved off lie daubs another little tract
of skin, shaves, nnd so keeps ou until
the tnsk Is over.
Not only tho lower faco nnd neck,
but also tho temples, forehead, the
sparo around tho cars nnd the lower
back of the head, are operated upon.
The ears require especial attention. Por
their treatment ho has -an ear razor,
no larger than n surgeon's lancet.
With this he shaves the fuzz on tho
A Shofllcld boot-maker displays this
notice lu his window: "Don't you wish
you were In my shoes?" Tlt-Blts.
"So you nro lu society?" "Yes." "In
renl society?" "Yes." "Wny-up so
ciety?" "Yes." "Does society know
lt?"-Ch!cngo Post
"Blngles Is n lucky man. His time
goes right on whether he Is waking ot
slcsplng, sick or well." "What Is Bln
gles' business?" "Watchmaker."
Blobbs-How did you like tho melo
drama? Was anybody killed? Slobba
No; tho audience yelled for tho au
thor, but Jio wouldn't come out
"Undo William, are you troubled
nbout thn hnreiiftcrV" "N'n anli! It'a
back of the tar, the down on the front ! do whnrfo' cr do herein what keeps
nnd tho bristles lu tho car passage. . mo gucssln'l" Atlanta Constitution.
TIOOM, WISH., 1DVEDTISIML
D KNABEL,
1V Proprietor of
THE GERMAN IIAKKRY AND COFFER
1'AItl.OKH.
Freih Dread and Cakes daily. Ornamental
Cnle a tprrlnlty. Only the beat and purr
material used In our llakcry. Dread delivered
free loany jmrt of tlie city. Telephone ParJt
TBI, 1117 Pacific Avenue, Tacoins, Waihlngtoa.
ROTHSCHILD & CO.
Port Towniend, Washington.
8HIPPINO AND COMMISSION MEKCttANTfa,
Cuitom llouie Drokcri and Stevedore.
Eitabll.ucd ISoS.
Branch offices Taooma r4
Seattle.
ENTU0KY LIQUOR CO.
Peter Sandbars, Proprietor.
WINES, LIQUORS AND CWARS.
Ale.
Tele-
Pole agent for Onirics' Stout and Unit'
litena tiros, liottllnel. KstabllMicd 1681.
plimio Main 6W. iuo l'aclllo Avenue; 11
Commerce St. Tacoma, Washington.
Lady Tourist (doing the cnthedrnls
or Scotland) This Is Gothic, Isn't It,
John? Juvenile Vender of "Guides"
(severely) No, mem. This Is Presby-
After shaving, he polishes tho ear with
a cottou pad, and then a hard-stone
rubber. According to the tonsorlal
canons of the far east, the model ear
Is pink and polished, like, a carving tcrlan.
1 3L i . . ... ... I Sounds thrilling: Bobble-Paw, will
Tho hairs which grow lu the nostrils y0l, buy mo l)0ok? ,,nthcrWunt Is
are removed by tweezers This opera- the namo o tho book you want? Bob-
tlon, painful to an Amcrlcnn, hns no , bio-"Nlcaragua Bill." -Ohio State
terrors for John Chinaman. He be-' journal
gins tweezering In youth, and at 25 Is, ' . '., . . , ,.
accustomed to the practice. According ' J" cofl(,cn: o Customcr-Wnl or.
t th. i.nM,r ii,n ..... -n. i. "l Quarter. Suggest a good din-
or and looser,' so that ! eacL " Ulv conic. ' ? ' W",tCr "? WC,r)'
l DUIUU VIUIT it'BUIUlllUl, BIT.
TKY
Frye Bruhn Sfc Co.
1310 Pacific Avenue, Tacoma, Waah.
Wholesale and Retail Butchers
Meats furnished (or Railroads
and Steamboat Lines'.
out with but llttlo trouble or Binnrt.
After shaving comes the dressing of
the cue. This Is not a simple straud
of hair, as It appears, say's tho New
York Post, but a rope lu which n llt
tlo hair Is Ingeniously plnlted xvlth
black silk cords. The average cue Is
one-fourth hair and three-fourths silk.
llio barber uuplnlts It, layB nsldo tho
silk, shampoos, dries and oils the hair;
rulrn It with a silk cloth, combs It out,
and then braids It with the silk. Af
ter the braiding is over he scents tho
tho masterpiece with a very small
amount of some perfume.
When the customer Is In n hurry this
ends tho operation. In other cases ho
pnsses through a scries of massage aud
Swedish movements. His head Is ro
tated, his back aud shoulders pounded
aud rubbed, his arms aud bunds moved
vigorously at every Joint, tho lingers
opened nnd shut nnd each knuckle pull
ed until It cracks. Tho barber must
examine the eyebrows, eyelashes and
fingernails and attend to every blem
ish. Por this purpose ho has tluy scis
sors, camel's-halr pencils and Instru
ments very much like thoso of tho
manicurist.
For skin disorders ho hns many prep
arations, washes, ointments, powders
and plasters. Young Chinamen, espe
cially the well-to-do, are eager to hnvo
nice complexions, and rely upon tho
barber for the euro of all cutaneous dls
dors. Ills compensation Is very good,
from either a western or eastern point
of vlev?. Por a shave he charges 115
cents, nnd for n full performance, wth
an mo oriental extras thrown In, a hair
dollar. , i
In ouo respect ho may bo lmltatedjby
our own tradesmen. He uses a towel
made of soft silk, which Is a hundred
fold more grateful to tho skin than tho
cotton or linen tissues of our own civilization.
When all the poison baa been forced out
t the system the Cancer beaU, and the
disease sever returns.
Cancer begins often in a small way, as the
following letter from Mrs. Sbirer shows .
A mall pimple came on ray Jaw about an inch
kclowlbecarontheleftaUaolsayface. Jtfayi
finer, aud I should bat
forgotten about it bad it
atottxgiui to lnSameaM
Itch ; Tl fuld bleed a
little, tbea scab over, but
, t juld not heat TtUa
ontlaucd for sometime,
when my Jaw began to
well, becoming very
palaful. Tue Cancer be.
an to cat and aprcad,
latil it was a Urge a a
faalfdollar.whenlaearA
f S. a. p. a uJ determla.
a to live it a fair trial,
and H was lemarkablc
what a wa-Mcrful effect
k had from the try Uglaatog ; theaare btf am U
Steal and after taking a few bottles disappeared
vhuivij. u wii iitb year ago j mcicarcsii!
BO mat of the Cincrr. and mv nnrnt tieatll
eoaliauca good. Mas. IU Sawi. La Plata, Mo
u uta ereateK ot bl
I blood purifiers, and the
only on gaaraatecc.
JajaES ;
OBtiauc good. Mm
SSS
purely vegetable. Sem
for our tree book oi
CtBcar, contalaleg valuable aad interest
lay information about tint disease, ant
write our phytkiaes about Tear cat, Wt
make bo charge for medical advice.
tmxx Sr3 et atlauta, u.
The wife, however, couldn't precisely
ee this.
"Why don't you Join that camping
party that's going down the Potomac
to-night for a week or bo, until mam
ma gets better, and then we'll go to the
seaside together?" she suggested.
"They're all nice boys, you know."
"Don t care for these stag outfits
any more," he replied.
"Well," she said, "why can't yon go
to some quiet little place over In Mary
land on the Chesapeake and stay there
until I Join you, to go to Atlantic City?"
He didn't make any reply to this, but
looked gloomily out of the window,
"Ob," she went on, "why couldn't
yon go and visit 'your brother at his
West Virginia farm until I am able to
go to the beach with you?"
This Idea didn't appear to make much
of a bit with blm, either, and ro bo
kept etui
"What fun would It be," she contin
ued, "for you to go to. that Atlantic
City hotel, where' there are about forty
,Mr)s to one man. and all of the horrid
things grinning at the mea (Ike chessj
cats, while 'S
How Ho Lost Pension.
"I'vo Just applied' for a government
pension," he said, "but I don't think
I'll get it."
"Why not?"
"Well, you see I caught a bad cold
In the Civil War."
"Of course."
"An' It's been a-worklu' on-me ever
sence."
"Naturally."
"An' t'other day It broke out In a
galloplu' consumption."
"Why, you don't look like a "
"I know It; an' that's Jest where the
trouble comes In. Tho very minute the
consumption hit me, an' I put In my
application to tho government, the old
lady fell to prayln' fcr me, an' 'bout a
quarter to 10 o'clock last night or
mebbe it wua 20 minutes to 10 her
prayer wuz answered, an' I com
menced to feel better, until now I'm
Accidental Convene.
There are tuoro people than there
ought to bo lu this country who wor
ship patent medicines, but a mission
ary in Burma gives an accouut In
Stray Stories of how she was the Inno
cent cause of the worship of empty
medicine bottles having been Insti
tuted. In ono of her tours she came upon a
village where cholera was raging. Hnv
Ing with her a quantity of palu-klller,
and thinking that she might at least
allay the Buffering somewhut, she went
from houso to house administering the
remedy, and left a number of bottles
to be used after she had gono.
When she returned to the vlllnge
tome months later she was met by the
head man of the community, who
cheered and delighted her by this In
telligence: "Teacher, we have como
over to your slJ; the medlclue did us
'feared I'm plum well. Takln' me nt i0 n,uch. .good tmU we uave ccepted
my looKa no government in the world , rfXT .
. . . . 'I itvni1nt
Is a-goln' to pension me, I don't want
to muzzle the old lady, but It looks like
I'll have to. Atlanta Constitution.
Overjoyed at this news, she was con-
ducted to the house of tho head man,
who opened the door of a room and
showed her the painkiller bottles sol-
Lesson in Politeness. eranly arranged In a row upon the
The oldest boy Is a treasure, but In helf; and before them tho whole corn-
trying to be polite be sometimes slips P8-"? Immediately prostrated them-
up. The father of this lad bad reared selves In worship.
him to be always courteous to bis el
ders. On going to a distant school bis
father bad told him to telegraph home
"Yes" If he found everything satisfac
tory and arrived safely. He did so,
but the busy father had forgotten the
arrangement, so, being puzzled, he
telegraphed back; "Yes, what?" The
answer, came: "Yes, sir."
A Sufferer's Plea.
Lady You are sure you have put the
piano In good condition?
Tuner Quite so, madam. I guest your
daughter will find It as good at new
when she resumes her practice.
Lady I hope so. Did you do anything
to It, by the way, besides tuning?
Tuner Yes; I deadened the hammers.
Rear Boom Hoarder (sotto voce) I
wish, while you were about It, you had
done the same to the hammerer. Bleb
mond Dispatch.
What has become of the old-fashioned
man who. when asked where he got
his new clothes, replied: "Sold eggs
and buyed 'fin 7"
Ax the Uame.
"nurrab for Spider!" shouted the tall
young man In the grand stand.
"Spider?" echoed the pretty girl 'by
his side. "Why In tho world do you
call him such a name?"
"Because he catches so many files.
Do you understand?"
She did not. understand, but she
quickly retorted:
"Well, If he catches files why don't
you call him 'Ply Paper?"
' ' " ' ' i 1 1 i i
Hello of Uonaparto.
The historic dessert service which
was to have figured at a banquet In
Brussels by which Napoleon had Doped
to celebrate a victory over the allied
forces was recently sold In Brussels
for the sum of $1,000. The strange
part of It all Is that so valuable a ser
vice should have been held In Brussels
to loug at so low a price.
We all do a great deal of grumbling,
and there la usually something back of
It
Smart Set
Traveling Acquaintance I wonder
that tho regular passengers don't agi
tate for better service. Commuter
Wo do, nt times, but It merely gets ut
agitated. Puck.
Poor Mike: Doctor -How nbout that
mustard'plastcr I prescribed for your
husband? Mrs. Grogau Bhuro, doc
thor, I couldn't mnke Mlko ato mort
nor th' half av It. Judge.
It's queer that people who are al
ways railing at the world are never
theless willing to pay the doctors a
fortune to keep them from leaving It
In a hurry. Atlanta Constitution,
Tho commuter at homo: Suburban
This Is shameful! I'll hot stand that
cook's lusolrjnco a moment longer. At
soon as I get to Now York I'll ring her
up on the telephone aud discharge her.
Judge.
Looking blue for milkman:' "I more
than suspect our mllkmnn." "Of what
do you suspect him?" "Of trying to
work tho Filipino water-cure ou us.
Look at 'the color of that tullkt"
Cleveland Plain 'Dealer.
"Say, our bookkeeper Is foolish."
"What do you mean?" "Why, ho Bays
when he gots old he wants money
enough to go out aud live whero he
can see tho moon go down behind a
hedge." Chicago Itecdrd.
Analysis: She After all, what Is the
dlffercucj between Illusion nnd delu
sion? He Illusion Is the lovely fan
cies wo hnvo about ourselves; delusion
Is tho foolish fancies other people have
about themselves. Life.
A comedown for her: "Did 1 under
stand you to say that she lowered her
telf when 'she married him?" "Yes.
8ho slid down from n third-story win
dow, using a ropo mfido of bedclothes."
Chicago Record-Herald.
Discretion: "So you mndo a great
bit In your presentation of 'Hamlet,'
Mr. Barnstormer? I suppose the audi
ences called you to como out before
the curtain." "Called mo? They
dared mel" Baltimore News.
"it would be helpful to you," said
tho prison visitor "If you could takt
somo motto and try. to llvo up to It."
"Thut's right." replied tho convict;
"I'd llko to select, for Instance, 'Wo
are hero today and gone to-morrow.' "
-Tlt-Blts.
The proper thing: Tho President-
Then you don't caro to.have your tinino
mentioned lu connection with your out
hundred million dollnr gift to our uni
versity?" The Philanthropist Well,
you might say that you give mynume
without my consent. Ex.
Cheerful: Tess So, Mr. Groosum
really proposed to you? Tess Yes,
While we were strolling In the ceme
tery we came to their family lot, and
be asked me bow I'd like to be burled
there some day, with his name on the
stone above me. Philadelphia Press.
"Do you think It would Improve my
style?" Inquired the 'varsity man who
had got Into. the crew through favorite
Ism, "If I were to acquire a, fustor
stroke?" "It would Improve the
crew," replied tfio cnnuiii trainer, "If
you got a paralytic stroke." Tlt-Blts.
No conversation: Barber You're
next, sir. Hulr cut? Pepprey Yet,
aud here, put this In your pocket for
yourself. Barber Thank you, sir. I
don't often get my tip before I begin,
and I appreciate Pepprey 1 don't
want you to consider that u tip. but
"hush money." Philadelphia Press.
Mummy Bless tnah heart I If de
chile ain't cutttu' his eye-tooth I Little
'Itustus (In alarm) What's an eye
tooth, ronmmy? Mummy Why, 'do
eye-tooth, chile, watches ehry word dat
yo tongue uttehs, an' ebry time you
say a bud word It'll pulu dut good eye
tooth bo much dat It'll ache fo' two
uouahs! Puck.
"Lady," begun the dusty wayfarer,
"could you help u poor sufferer of
Mont Pelce?" 'Mont Pelee?" echoed
the housewife; "why, you un no real
dent of Martinique.' "I know dat
mum, but 1 am a sufferer, Just d
lame. Half de things kind ladles li.ttl
saved fer me dey sent down dere."
i'hlladclpbla Itccord.
TRLRPIIONR tit.
TACOMA CARRIAGE and BAGGAGE
TRANSFER COMPANY.
Office 102 Tenth Bt., Southeast corner of A.
TACOMA, WASH.
Hicks, Ciupes, Carries, BtsOtfi WiftM
. At All Hours.
PaueriReri and nrsKe tramferred lease
reildvncci and tiotela to aud from all boat! atUI
tritlni. Hand vour rhvcki for Vjkkk to out
mcipeiiKvn, who will meet )ouoii all luconw
Inptraliiiand boata. Klist c4i l.herr. Onea
iTiilglit. All rlgi marked "T.O. All. t.C.
Grand Central HoteL
W. W. 1IAKMON, Leuee and Ugr.
Headquarters for Lumbermea
Miners and Tourists.
Flnt clan bar In connection.
1211-1218 raclno Avenue. TACOMA, Water
Tacoma Trunk Factory.
Trunks, Traveling Bags, Suit Cattt a4
Telescopes.
REPAIRING DONE.
730 Pacific Art.
Ticeni, Will
HUNT & MOTTET CO.
Sealers In
General Hardware
Mill AND LOGGERS' SUPPLIES.
t
1501-1603-1505 Pacific Avenu
TACOMA, WASH.
...OLYMPIC...
Steam Laundry
407 South J Street
MICHAEL J. BJOHN 4 LOUIS J. BJOII
VltUI'lllKTOIta
TACOMA, WA8H.
W. C. HOLMAN.
Dealer In
Agricultural Implements
Wagons, Buggies, Etc,
210, 213, 214 Front Street, Cor. Bslmoa,
PORTLAND, OREGON.
WHEN VOU 11UY
Furniture, Carpets and Stoves
tOU IIOUSHKEKl'I.VQ
Cut Tlili Out and (Jet a Ikductlou a
Henry Jennings.
USe-174 Flrtt Ntrcat.
Pendleton Roller Mills
W. S. I1VKH8, I'roprletor.
Daily Capacity 800 Barrcli.
Manufacturer! of
Bine
Ribbon nd Dyers' Ileal
Hrmi and Hliorts.
Rolled Hurley always on Hand.
Pendleton, Oregon
Floor,
r
fr