A6
THE DAILY ASTORIAN • TuESDAY, JANuARY 15, 2019
Sister’s attitude changed
Dear Annie: I am writing
When I called her before
to ask your opinion about the Thanksgiving, I commented that
change in my sister’s behavior I had not heard from her since
toward me. I have two sisters, June, and she said she was stay-
and the one I am speaking of is ing busy. I have thought and
thought, but I can-
my elder sister, “Ruth.”
not think of anything
Ruth has always
DEAR
I could have done to
been envious of my
ANNIE
offend her. Family has
younger sister and me
always meant a great
and resented the close
deal to me. What are
relationship I had with
your thoughts? —
our father.
Puzzled Sister
Until recently, Ruth
Dear Puzzled Sis-
would call me about
ter: Consider the pos-
once a week to say
ANNIE LANE
sibility that she’s act-
hello and check on me. I
Creators
ing distant not just
would call and say hello
Syndicate Inc.
toward you but toward
to her. She lives about
2 1/2 hours away from me. Her everyone. She may be suffering
husband passed away suddenly, from depression triggered by her
and it was some time after that husband’s passing — or at the
when I noticed a difference in very least be grieving deeply.
the way she relates to me. Her People can seem to be in per-
calls have been less frequent. fectly good health on the out-
When I call her, she has very lit- side but be hurting badly on the
tle to say and then says she has inside. You might try reaching
to go. I don’t believe she has a out to her children — not speak-
health problem. She is still work- ing ill of their mother or causing
undue concern but simply ask-
ing. Her children live nearby.
On her birthday, I sent a card ing whether all is well with them
and called her. She was polite but and with her. Maybe your nieces
and nephews have noticed the
guarded in her conversation.
She has never been a par- change in her behavior, too, and
ticularly happy person, but her will be glad you asked.
Lastly, let go of the idea that
behavior has changed drastically.
Ruth has always been envi-
ous of you and your sister. That
kind of baggage is what piles up
between family members, pre-
venting real communication.
Dear Annie: In this country,
how many young people ever
ask for advice from older genera-
tions on anything? Almost none.
We’ve been raised to assume
that those born in the computer
age know everything there is to
know about everything. Not true.
The result is that millions of
older folks feel invisible, isolated
and depressed and that younger
folks make some big mistakes.
Turn to an older person in
your family today — parent,
grandparent, aunt, uncle — and
simply ask for the person’s input
on some plan you are consider-
ing. You don’t have to take the
advice; just ask.
The result will be an elder
who still feels respected and
valuable for having wisdom.
And this person may reveal a
story from his or her own past
that (surprise, surprise) just
might give you some fabu-
lously useful bits of guidance,
some pearls of wisdom. At the
very least, family bonds will be
strengthened. — Sally
TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE
By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc.
ARIES (March 21-April 19). You may think that
you don’t need to be appreciated — that your ego
is small enough and your spirit big enough not
to require a lot of validation along the way — but
appreciation is vital to your momentum. Go where
it flows.
and nuance — all abundantly available to you now.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). You help people make
upgrades to their situation whether or not their
scene is within your expertise. How? Compassionate
inquiry. You ask the questions that get people think-
ing. You listen well, reflecting back what you hear.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). There are many
things you could take issue with, and you would
have in past eras, but now you’re too occupied
with bigger things, too focused on what matters, to
bother with them. It’s a sign of how far you’ve come.
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). You already know that
the way to accomplish big things is to do small
things on a consistent basis. And today you’ll get a
better idea about what those small steps really need
to be.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). Maybe it doesn’t
seem like a lot of progress, or harm, is occurring,
as the case may be. But what would happen if this
state continued daily? The trajectory will matter
more than net results of any given day.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). There are a few bad
influences around. Possibly it can’t be helped. These
may be forces that aren’t going anywhere soon.
They’re just a part of the landscape right now, giv-
ing you good reason to keep yourself in check.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). What is the point of a
book club where people don’t read the book? Many
value the social and identity aspects of a group and
yet don’t want to put in the intellectual rigor. This is
a metaphor for the dynamic you deal with today.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Relationships get a longer
look. You’ll notice how behaviors change from mo-
ment to moment, but what doesn’t change is the
fundamental dynamic of the relationship, and there
are insights to be gained through examining that.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). On a very scientific lev-
el, the world you know is created inside your mind,
as it’s the only way our brains can process it. Today
works this way: You will yourself to let in more light,
beauty and joy and so it happens.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Consider the actions
that make up your routine. Habits are like com-
pound interest. They may not seem hugely signifi-
cant to the bottom line over the course of a day, but
over time they are enormously consequential.
TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (Jan. 16). Remember
when you came within inches of victory? The expe-
rience will only serve to make your victory in 2019
all the sweeter. Other highlights: the approval of
someone whose opinion you cherish, a travel plan
that goes better than your highest expectations
and the fun you have circulating in a high-powered
group. Virgo and Gemini adore you. Your lucky
numbers are: 26, 30, 35, 2 and 5.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Most problems you
encounter get solved with a commonly known
solution. Problems that prove resistant to the usual
solutions will require patience, awareness, empathy
FRANK AND ERNEST
BLONDIE
THATABABY
SALLY FORTH
PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN
B.C.
LOLA
DILBERT
SIX CHIX
BIZARRO
MUTTS
NON SEQUITUR
BABY BLUES
WIZARD OF ID
ZITS
ROSE IS ROSE
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Emotional labor has
always been a main component of the labor force
that makes the world go around, though this work
is often invisible and typically unacknowledged. Not
today. Today, you’ll get props for your contribution.