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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (Nov. 20, 2018)
6A FEATURES Support for sister in a toxic home Dear Annie: My sister and hope and despair. A trouble I grew up in a pretty troubled shared is a trouble halved, after home. Thankfully, I got out of the all. Keep being the loving and house by leaving for college, but supportive big sister that you are, my sister has not been so lucky. and trust that your sister will get School has never been easy for through school and out of your her, so she is still stuck in a toxic parents’ house soon. home environment. I make sure Dear Annie: Another helpful to show her lots of sup- piece of advice for “Sit- DEAR ting Around,” who lost port and listen whenever her job and is feeling idle she needs someone to ANNIE and lazy at home, is to talk to. I know that helps, get exercise. She already but I always wish I could has the built-in structure do more. Our family is of meeting with friends struggling financially, so for coffee. Maybe a few we cannot help pay for times a week, instead her to move out. While of or in addition to that, she’s still at community Lane they could exercise college, it seems that her Annie Creators Syndicate Inc. together. It could even only option is to spend be something as simple the next couple of years saving up her earnings from a as going for a 30-minute walk. part-time job until she can afford The physiological effects of exer- to get a place of her own. Is there cise are similar to those of anti- anything else I could do? I hate depressants. Exercise releases seeing her suffering this way. — endorphins, which help a per- son feel good (and maybe would Survivor’s Guilt Dear Survivor’s Guilt: You give “Sitting Around” the energy say you wish you could do more, boost she needs to be more moti- but you are already doing more vated and productive). Volunteer- than you seem to realize sim- ing could also make her life more ply by showing your sister sup- meaningful and have similar pos- port and listening to her when- itive effects. — Catherine, RN ever she needs someone to talk to. Dear Catherine: It’s amaz- Those are not small things. They ing how invigorating exercise is. can mean the difference between I suppose it’s related to one of Newton’s laws: Objects in motion tend to stay in motion. Once you get your body moving, it’s much easier to get your mind and spirit moving, too. Thanks for your letter. Dear Annie: This is in response to your reply to “Stay- ing Faithful,” the woman who is upset that a promiscuous woman is being hired in her husband’s department. You said that as long as the woman keeps things pro- fessional, her personal life isn’t anyone’s business. Maybe I’m missing something, but if she is having men to her department, I think it is someone’s business. What she does at home is her business, but sexual relations at the workplace are another matter. I haven’t worked in a few years, but is this acceptable behavior now? Just wondering. — B.H. Dear B.H.: In no way, shape or form is that sort of behavior OK. I’m sorry if I worded things carelessly and gave the impres- sion that I condoned it. At the end of the day, who her husband’s employer hires is not up to her — or us, for that mat- ter. “Staying Faithful” should be able to trust that her husband is staying faithful, no matter who he works with. Thanks for writing. THE DAILY ASTORIAN • TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 20, 2018 TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. ARIES (March 21-April 19). You might be surprised at what brings you to your senses — little random splashes of life to wake you out of the lull of ordinary moments. Once your body is alert to it, delights come one after another. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). Would you rath- er scroll through life or stroll through it? Your earth sign wisdom will choose the latter, and yet the dictates of your lifestyle will probably have you doing the former unless you make a conscious effort to get out. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Every feeling is a message. Many of those messages aren’t that big of a deal, but if you ignore or shush them, they become more powerful. Nothing likes to be stifled. A feeling will fight for life like any living thing. CANCER (June 22-July 22). Nonverbal com- munication is usually more informative than verbal communication. And yet, the particular words used will be significant today. Keep track; the legalities of the matter will depend on it. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). It takes some boldness to be vulnerable, but if you have the guts to share a bit about what you really want, you’ll find out quickly whether the other person has compatible needs. You’ll know right away if this is worth pursuing or not. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Even exception- ally loving people sometimes love to hate who they hate. Exceptionally intelligent people will mostly do this in their own diaries though, especially under this gossipy sky. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). You’ll feel honored to have a starring role in the life story of oth- ers. Just know that it’s a story you don’t get to FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE write. You’ll play your part however you wish, and they’ll interpret it however they wish. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Sympathy is a state of compassion for others that may involve concern or pity. Empathy takes it next level. You don’t merely observe the way others are feeling, you share in it. Go cautiously with this business. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Allow your mind and heart to guide you in the art and responsibility of putting yourself higher on your list of priorities. Make yourself important now. Don’t wait for your health to have to do the guiding. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). You may be the catalyst that, through no effort or intention of your own, happens to awaken something in others. This has repercussions. Know what’s your responsibility and what isn’t. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). People want answers, and they’ll come to you. It’s flattering, though you’re not obligated to contribute. Also, consider that sometimes wordless answers are the most accurate. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). How much free will each person actually has is a philosophi- cal and existential debate. But if you don’t feel free, it’s a problem. That much is clear. Active- ly seek to gain more agency in your own life. TODAY’S BIRTHDAY (Nov. 21). The Dalai Lama, Bill Murray and you have something in common this year. None of you regard new people as strangers; you interact as though always with friends. A combination of intelligent curiosity and good relationships will carry you from one interesting experience to another. Capricorn and Pisces adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 3, 38, 22, 18 and 50.
