THE DAILY ASTORIAN • FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 21, 2018
FEATURES
New woman causes concern
Dear Annie: My brother-in-law, I don’t want to support this? I think it’s
“Ted,” and his wife decided to call a huge mistake for the family to move
it quits over the holidays after being in with my brother-in-law, but it’s not
together since high school (about 25 my place to say. My biggest concern
years). Their relationship was very is that a 16-year-old girl would move
strained and was more of a room- in with a man whom her mother
mate situation than a marriage for at barely knows. My brother-in-law
least 15 years, getting worse
would never hurt her or touch
DEAR
every year. His wife moved
her, but still it seems inappro-
priate. Am I reading too much
out of their house in Feb-
ANNIE
ruary, and he immediately
into this? I don’t even want
went on dating sites. About
him bringing her to my house
four months ago, he started
without her mother. My hus-
band is extremely upset with
seeing a woman he had met
me for not being supportive of
online. Before they even
his brother’s relationship but
met, she was sending him
does see there is something
racy photos and text mes-
Lane
sages. He is now completely Annie
wrong with a child’s mov-
Creators
Syndicate Inc.
ing in without her mother. —
hooked on her. He doesn’t
Extremely Concerned
have any kids; she has four,
Dear Extremely Concerned:
from three different men. All the kids,
at one point or another, have had This situation is wonky every which
issues with self-harm or depression. way. If your husband can’t see that,
We’ve witnessed the mom giving one he’s got his head in the sand. What
concerns me the most is the well-be-
of her children alcohol.
She and Ted are already plan- ing of all of this woman’s children.
ning on moving in together. She It’s devastating to hear that children
lives about two hours from here. She are engaging in self-harm. It’s dis-
won’t be moving in until Decem- turbing that she was giving one of
ber, but she has asked whether the them alcohol. I encourage you to
16-year-old girl can move in with document and report any maltreat-
Ted now, before school starts, so she ment to your local child protective
doesn’t have to switch schools half- services agency. To find the perti-
nent contact info for your state, visit
way through the year.
Am I being unreasonable because https://www.childwelfare.gov, and
click “Topics,” “Responding to Child
Abuse & Neglect” and “Reporting.”
Dear Annie: We see and hear of
so many folks struggling with addic-
tion issues of all types, yet frequently,
a major component is missing.
Many addicts have an undiagnosed
and untreated mental health condition
that is the cause of the addiction. Our
son began using drugs as a teenager
to treat his (undiagnosed at the time)
bipolar disorder and thus stunted his
brain growth/maturity. After several
starts and stops in facilities and despite
our own love and care, he died of a
heroin overdose at age 26 (three years
ago). His forever-17-year-old brain
could not grasp the concept of con-
stant treatment from the medical com-
munity, and he possibly would have
lived out his life in the type of struggle
described by “Sad Stepmom.”
In addition to Al-Anon, I would
like to suggest support groups from the
National Alliance on Mental Illness as
other resources to guide those strug-
gling to understand another compo-
nent of addiction. — Mom in Louisville
Dear Mom: I am so sorry for the
loss of your son. You raise an import-
ant point, that addiction can be a
symptom of mental illness. Thank
you for mentioning NAMI. Readers
who would like to learn more can visit
https://www.nami.org.
3C
TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE
By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc.
ARIES (March 21-April 19). Take heart and
keep working. Your excellent efforts will even-
tually be seen, acknowledged and awarded,
though perhaps not until you’ve reached a kind
of critical mass on your own accord.
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). The most difficult
thing to prioritize — the thing that people over-
look time and again — is the love they already
have. Get this right and you’ll be getting a lot
right. In fact, everything else will fall into place.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). Typically, a
thing you have no control over is not your
problem. If it bothers you, the problem is
the bothering and not the thing itself. The
solution will be an understanding and a
reckoning that happens in your mind.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Letting
go of the need to control anyone but yourself
will liberate your energy and put you in a
more loving, receptive mode. The magic
motto is, “To each his own.”
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). The time line feels
more like a continuum now because when
one thing ends, another picks up right where
that left off. If you want to take a break and a
breath, you’ll have to willfully carve that out.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). Your big
plans are getting even bigger, which, oddly
enough, will have you focusing on dozens
of very small but crucial details today. These
are the efforts that practically guarantee an
unforgettable experience.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). You’re the
“wise” for whom “a word to” is usually
sufficient. Today you’re so tuned in that you
don’t even need the word. A slightly raised
eyebrow is more than enough for you to get
the info and react accordingly.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). There are
questions people can handle and then
there are questions that are akin to opening
Pandora’s box. They overwhelm and create
chaos that can’t be put back. Think twice
before you ask.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). There’s so much
you want to do with this weekend. But if
you try to do everything, you’ll end up doing
nothing of note. Your ideal move is to pick
one focus and do it well.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). There’s a
reasonable-sized cosmic shift happening
and however you feel about what’s going on,
you’re likely to feel differently about it tomor-
row. So hold on and enjoy the roller coaster.
Ride it out until the end.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). You’re a great
friend. Your kind words and support will really
make a difference to another person. Your
luck will double when you offer the same
sort of encouragement to yourself.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Take advantage
of the astral magic offered today by acting as
though you already have what you want. It
will feel so fantastic to appreciate your great
fortune that you will find it’s actuality quite
irrelevant.
FRANK AND ERNEST
BLONDIE
THATABABY
SALLY FORTH
PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN
B.C.
LOLA
DILBERT
SIX CHIX
BIZARRO
MUTTS
NON SEQUITUR
BABY BLUES
WIZARD OF ID
ZITS
ROSE IS ROSE
TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (Sept. 22).
You’ll be able to pour hundreds of hours into
the thing that is your joy. More excitement
this solar year will include: solving a mystery
and later being rewarded for it, seeing the
something you planted ages ago make a
life-changing difference for a stranger, and
finally hearing the loving words written on
your heart. Aquarius and Leo adore you.
Your lucky numbers are: 4, 17, 42, 9 and 26.