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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (May 11, 2018)
THE DAILY ASTORIAN • FRIDAY, MAY 11, 2018 FEATURES Quandry for divorced gay dad Dear Annie: I am a gay divorced doesn’t want to be where he isn’t father of three. I divorced the wanted. My problem with this deci- mother of my children after almost sion, which I feel is unreasonable, 30 very difficult years of psycho- is twofold. First, though my future logical and physical abuse. When son-in-law’s mother is flying in for we first separated, my eldest daugh- the wedding here in the U.S., they ter pulled me aside and offered to are having a second ceremony in testify on my behalf if the her country at a later date. DEAR divorce proceedings war- I feel they should be sensi- ranted it. tive to my needs here and ANNIE This daughter is soon to sensitive to his mother at marry a wonderful young the second ceremony over- seas. Second, the reception man, whose family hap- pens to be from a coun- will be populated with all try with a more conserva- of my ex-wife’s friends, tive society. She claims that who were my friends but divorce is almost unheard have been turned against Lane of there, let alone homo- Annie me. These people have Creators Syndicate Inc. sexuality. She informed me never once sent a note or that my fiancé, “Ray,” is not phoned me to see how I’ve welcome at her wedding and recep- been doing over the past five years. tion because her future mother-in- I strongly feel that I need Ray there. law would “freak out,” as she isn’t He is my rock. I am feeling more used to such things. Mind you, Ray and more insecure and uncomfort- and I are quite modest and reserved able as the time approaches. Any people, and we are not demonstra- advice? — Gay When I Give Her tive of our love and affection in Away front of others. Unless she or her Dear Gay When I Give Her fiancé has already told her future Away: To me, the most important mother-in-law, it is reasonable to word in your letter is in your sig- assume she would not even sus- nature line — the word “her.” This pect us of being anything other than is 100 percent about your daughter good buddies. and her day. You are there to cele- I am really struggling with this, brate and support her on her very even though Ray is fine about it and special wedding day. I would sim- ply ask her again for her thoughts and feelings about your bring- ing Ray. Be honest with her about how you are afraid your old friends will judge you and you really need Ray’s support. It sounds as if you raised wonderful children, so your daughter will probably be under- standing. But if not, let her have the final say. Dear Annie: You publish quite a few letters from women com- plaining about men. Recently, you published one about men spitting. I won’t even attempt to defend that. However, I would like to point out that many women also have some bad habits. So let me put it in the form of a question: Why do so many women gather in groups talking to one another and clogging the aisles of the grocery? Often when I go to a grocery, I’ll run into three or four chatting women with shopping carts blocking an aisle. When I gently ask them to let me through, they give me dirty looks. All women? No. But neither do all men spit in public. Some men, some women. Let’s be fair. — Male Reader for Gender Fairness Dear Male Reader for Gender Fairness: I’m printing your letter in the name of balance and more navi- gable grocery aisles. 3C TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. ARIES (March 21-April 19). You’ll witness works of whimsy and wonder, “Who has time for that?” Clearly, somebody who thought it was important enough. This will be oddly empowering to you. Your own whimsy is important, too, after all! TAURUS (April 20-May 20). The thing inside you that wants to dance will not stand by much longer. The call of the music will soon be too irresistible. So the question now is — partner or no partner? GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Think twice be- fore you add anything because any addition at all will change the whole picture. There is no way around it. More moving parts means more complexity. CANCER (June 22-July 22). There are obvi- ous problems with this path, but that doesn’t mean you’re on the wrong one. If you can figure out your path through supposed contra- dictions, you can help others do the same. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). You’re working on something significant, yet your approach is playful. You’re like a pen making spontaneous marks on the paper world — doodling for fun and profit, working out the intricacies of life with your whimsy. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). People describe what’s happening in the senses with words that apply across all five. The word “sharp” can apply to a note that leans up, a line that cuts through, a cheese that curls the tongue ... and your mind in general today. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). You’ll leave one situation and enter a better one. After this, it’s going to be hard for you to think of anything as lost ever again. What’s lost is never gone, it’s someplace else. FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). All who wander are not lost, and all who meander are not wasting time. The sparks of imagination will count for something later. This is all adding up to something more tangible. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). When you help someone grow, you will learn things again, the way they learn things. Together you’ll move through the electric moment that bridges not knowing to knowing. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). If you’re embarrassed by what you did a few years back, that’s an excellent sign of your growth. If you’re embarrassed by what you did a few weeks back, good! You’re now improving on a rapid scale. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). Enjoy the benefit of experience. You’re mellowing out. You’ve learned what’s worth paying excited attention to and what’s not. You know how to handle things, so you can relax even while taking on more. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). There are many things you could add to your practice in the name of getting good. But to get great will require you to go the opposite direction. Eliminate every extraneous element and isolate only what works. TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (MAY 12). You may admire the lives of others but it’s the ones who help you see your own life in all its glory that will be your cherished companions on this year’s path. You’ll showcase your talent over the next 10 weeks. There’s an important trade-off to make in June. Family events will inspire new ventures. Cancer and Pisces adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 7, 20, 12, 43 and 37.
