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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (Dec. 21, 2017)
12 // COASTWEEKEND.COM Coast Weekend’s local restaurant review PLAZA JALISCO MEXICAN RESTAURANT Plaza Jalisco serves up one-note comfort food about what kind of peppers you use as how many of them make it to the pot. I suspect the árbols were tossed MOUTH@COASTWEEKEND.COM FACEBOOK.COM/MOUTHOFTHECOLUMBIA liberally into my batch of Cama- rones a la Diabla (i.e., “The devil’s he server told me: “Don’t cry.” shrimp”). But it was too late. But let’s be clear: My recounting The hot sauce had me the spice story is not meant as a jab blubbering. My face broadcast the at Plaza Jalisco. I was searching for burn like a billboard: cheeks welled heat, and they delivered. (I was told up and rosy, eyes watering and a nose there is an even hotter house-made like a leaky faucet. My lips tingled sauce, though they were out at the and I noticed myself actually panting, time.) Indeed, I consider myself a as if freeing my sizzling tongue from hot sauce connoisseur and evangelist an overwhelmed mouth would offer for spicy foods. As the tagline of a some respite. tinder-box of a Mexican joint in my There was more that the server hometown went: “Peace through couldn’t see: the dynamite blasting of pain.” I bought in. my sinuses, ear canals reverberating The árbol sauce pushed me toward like wind tunnels and the burst of en- that precipice. It was a head-spinner. dorphins perking up a sleepy winter Not quite a punishing ordeal but an evening. experience, to be sure. At first I thought the Plaza Jalisco And it’s what I’ll remember most Mexican Restaurant’s special house- from my trips to the Astoria restaurant made sauce was the culprit. But I … because the flavors were rote and started low and slow, with just a dab forgettable. of that dark, sun-burnt, smoky red Plaza Jalisco offers a facsimile of paste. It was more what you’ll find fire than flavor, so at the majority THE ÁRBOL I retreated. But the of Americanized heat persisted. Mexican restau- SAUCE WAS A As it turned rants in the region: HEAD-SPINNER. out, the fuel of that a menu with NOT QUITE A scorching paste pages and pages PUNISHING was also a key of dishes that stack ORDEAL, BUT AN sameness and but ingredient in the EXPERIENCE TO sauce of my main few degrees of course. That in- separation. Almost BE SURE. gredient: chiles de everything comes árbol. Every bite with lardy refried of the Camarones a la Diabla ($14.50, beans and insipid Spanish rice. Veg- gies are scant. There’s little freshness described in the menu as “slightly or nuance to speak of. Much of it hot,”) caused the flames to reignite tastes like it came from a can. like bellows on a fire. For reference: árbols (aka the “tree It is, I think, a bit remarkable that chile,” “bird’s beak chile” or “rat’s tail so many competing restaurants have chile”) range from 15,000 to 30,000 menus nearing 100 dishes, almost units on the Scoville scale. Jalapeño all of them overlapping. Ever been peppers fall between 2,500 and 8,000, to El Tapatio, on the east end of Tabasco sauce 2,500 to 5,000. Haba- Astoria? Plaza Jalisco’s food couldn’t neros, near the top, register between be more similar. A blind taste test to 100,000 and 350,000 units. figure who’s who would be quite a Now, heat can be just as much challenge. And that’s just part of the Rating: 212 Eighth St. Astoria, Ore., 97103 503-338-4440 Hours: 11 a.m. to 9 p.m. Sun- day through Thursday, 11 a.m. to 10 p.m. Friday and Saturday Price: $ – Most dishes hover between $10 and $15 Service: Speedy, jovial and personable Vegetarian / Vegan Options: Vegans need not apply Drinks: Full bar Review and photos by THE MOUTH OF THE COLUMBIA T Camarones a la Diabla Tres amigos: chile Colorado, chile verde, chile relleno, with rice and beans sameness in Astoria. There’s more, dotting the coast. Plaza Jalisco, like El Tapatio, is part of a small chain with six restaurants in Washington. In the Astoria location you’ll find the familiar, monochrome spectrum of Americanized Mexican: enchiladas, burritos, free chips, watery salsa and the damned combo plates. What you won’t find: an array of street-style tacos, fresh veggies, developed flavors or margaritas made without oodles of cane syrup. There’s no al pastor, lengua or chicharrón. The meats that do make the cut are thin, overcooked and under-seasoned. The carne asada and pollo asado had a BBQ-like char but cried out for salt to seal in the juices. At Plaza Jalisco you’ll find reason- able, sometimes teeming portions. The Burrito Carne Asada ($13.50) was the length of two regular burritos stuck end to end. I wished some KEY TO STAR RATING SYSTEM of that interior included veggies, avocado or sour cream (which were sprinkled conservatively on top). Some onions or pico de gallo inside would’ve been nice, too. As it was, the massive burrito was stuffed with just beans, rice and that under-sea- soned carne asada. Rather than one of Plaza Jalisco’s top burritos (and the second most expensive), it banished complexity as if angling for the kids menu. Plaza Jalisco is also built for speed. I was amazed how quickly some dishes landed on my table. The Tres Amigos ($16.95), one of the flagship items, arrived in little more time that it takes to scoop the components onto the plate. Two sips of the syrupy margarita and — boom! — there it is. The sauces on the Tres Amigos — chile Colorado and chile verde — were bland, almost opaque in flavor if not color. It was as if the dice-sized cubes of beef and pork had not been marinated, cooking in them. The hardly fresh poblano pepper in the chile relleno was slathered and filled with viscous cheese. Even in its stasis, the poblano’s earthiness was magnified alongside the melange of meaty, fatty and cheesy. Against the árbol sauce, the shrimp in the Camarones a la Diabla offered a bit of sweetness. The enchi- ladas were slim and boring. The pollo asado was tough. Nothing stepped Poor Below average Worth returning Very good Excellent, best in region outside the homogenized lane of Americanized Mexican. As with any restaurant touting authenticity, I entered in hopes of finding something inspired, perfect- ed or new. On that score I came out empty-handed. Plaza Jalisco’s is com- fort food, a single note hammered continuously. While the food is carbon-copied, Plaza Jalisco does deserve credit for its welcoming vibe. (And although the decor matches the model with bricky pastels and wooden booths, the plants are actually real!) It’s a place folks come to celebrate, and staff seem up to the task. On one trip a server gamely translated a Spanish-language cover song playing on the stereo in hopes I could find the source. I also overheard that same server being profusely thanked by a customer for treating her special-needs child with resounding care at a recent birthday party. Then there was the server who prodded me, with a welcome and deserved mix of pity and jest over my struggles with the árbol sauce. I’ll remember the heat at Plaza Jalisco. The flavor, not so much. CW
