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Making eyes with other men
Dear Annie: My husband of me again. He is afraid to go any-
45 years and I are at our wits’ where with me, not knowing what
end. We have seen counselors and I’ll do next. Please help me! —
even tried hypnosis, to no avail. Desperate in Montana
Dear Desperate: You’ve tried
I have a very unusual problem: I
am not able to stop looking at men therapy before, and now it is time
to try again. If you didn’t feel
sexually.
I have had this prob-
that the previous coun-
DEAR
selors were a good fit, do
lem all my life. A lot of
not hesitate to ask your
the times, I don’t remem-
ANNIE
ber even looking; my hus-
primary care doctor for
band points it out to me.
other recommendations.
I wink and look at them
Even if a therapist can’t
below the belt to get
fix the problem, he or
them to hit on me, and I
she can at least provide
get turned on by this. I
support, which you very
ignore my husband and
much need right now.
Lane
tune him out. I’m in my Annie
Lastly, I must implore
Creators
Syndicate Inc.
own little world. I shut
you not to hurt yourself
out everything and every-
— and if you feel that you
one else around me except my might, call 911 or the Suicide Pre-
victim. It doesn’t matter what the vention Lifeline (800-273-8255).
Dear Annie: I read the column
man looks like. Even when I’m
not looking at them in a flirtatious about “Jenna,” who is a hoarder,
manner, I tend to stare at men for and how terrible the conditions
of her house have become. At
longer than is appropriate.
This has become a horrible first, I had nothing but sympathy
habit. It has to stop. My husband for that situation, but I thought
has been very patient with me about how the letter mentioned
over the years and has tried to help that this woman has two nearly
me with this but now has given up grown kids, one going to be a
on me. I feel worthless and often sophomore, the other a senior. It
don’t want to live anymore. I have is difficult for me to fathom how
hurt him so badly that I can never these teenage children, despite
be forgiven. He can never trust their mother’s problems, haven’t
learned how to clear the table,
wash the dishes, clean the litter
box, put out some pest poison,
do the laundry or sweep out the
feces. They could not learn this
on their own? This is what I have
a problem with. If they could not
learn to do these things, then what
have they learned at all? I learned
how to do chores when I was
7 years old, including washing
dishes and housecleaning. On my
own, I learned to help my mother
do things when she was too busy
doing other things. I’m sorry I
am not more sympathetic, but
for these conditions to exist even
with teenage children, I just don’t
understand it. — James
Dear James: You cannot
expect children who grow up in
a hoarder home to develop good
housekeeping skills. Additionally,
hoarders tend to hold tightly to
a sense of control over their sur-
roundings. (Never mind how out
of control the situation looks to
everyone else.) It’s very possi-
ble that these children have tried
cleaning up their home but were
met with Mom’s resistance. So
though I commend you for help-
ing out around the house as a
child, I wouldn’t be so quick to
judge these kids.
THE DAILY ASTORIAN • MONDAY, NOVEMBER 13, 2017
TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE
By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc.
ARIES (March 21-April 19). Not all relation-
ships are built to last. If they were, you’d have
too many of them to devote the amount of
quality attention necessary for truly special
relationships. You learn something from even
the briefest encounters.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). You can and
should become your biggest fan, especially
in these early stages when the others aren’t
quite getting it yet. You’ve already been your
worst critic and biggest adversary, and it was
pointless. Go easy on yourself.
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Every wrong
answer is an opportunity to get smarter and
find the right one. It doesn’t matter how long
you’ve traveled in the wrong direction. If it’s
the wrong direction, it’s not going to get you
there; so just turn around.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). You’ll be
making some choices and changes today
— molding your world before someone else
does. It might not be pretty at first. Art is like
this. It often looks like a mess right up until it
all comes together.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). There are those who
will tell you that certain pursuits are a waste,
but you’re actually the only one who can
determine this for yourself. Chances are, if it
brings you enjoyment, it’s not wasted.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Since no one
wants to hear about things that were intend-
ed but didn’t quite happen, your choice is to
take action. Better to be wrong and strong
than well-intentioned with no follow-through.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). You’ll be wise to
put more thought into what would be most
comfortable, functional and appropriate for
what’s to come. The way you dress today will
FRANK AND ERNEST
BLONDIE
THATABABY
SALLY FORTH
PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN
B.C.
LOLA
DILBERT
SIX CHIX
BIZARRO
MUTTS
NON SEQUITUR
BABY BLUES
WIZARD OF ID
ZITS
ROSE IS ROSE
have a disproportionately significant impact
on what unfolds.
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). You’ll get into
some fun. Some might even call it trouble,
and they wouldn’t be far off. On the bright
side, it’s likely to be the kind of fun/trouble
that bubbles up then recedes just as quickly.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). You’ve
learned from your teachers, and yet what
you’re delivering these days has a flavor
that’s all your own. It may be time for you to
step out and share your unique take on it.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). There’s a
mystery to solve, and it’s time to get to the
bottom of it. Dig deeper. There is something
to solve here. You’re equipped with the right
tools, too, mainly diplomacy and curiosity.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). You’re misun-
derstood. It’s not that you’re being unclear; it’s
just that you’re not speaking their language.
Try again. Break it down. Figure out what
words are not breaking through. You got this.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). You were
hovered over, adored! Now the energy has
shifted, and someone else is getting the
attention. It’s only natural to feel a little weird,
but you’re also glad that you can finally do
what you want without so many eyes on you.
TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (Nov. 14). The
sun aligning as it did at the day of your birth
brings with it magical blessings, wishes
granted, desires fulfilled. You will be uniquely
centered in your needs, attracting them like
crazy, especially over the next eight weeks.
Just double-check to make sure that what
you need and want is really the best for ev-
eryone. Aries and Virgo adore you. Your lucky
numbers are: 30, 20, 1, 16 and 22.