THE DAILY ASTORIAN • TUESDAY, OCTOBER 31, 2017
FEATURES
Sons’s opinion upsets mom
Dear Annie: Just the other forted me about the situation.
day, my son, “Ben,” was talking All I could do was cry. I never
to his stepdad, and he said some knew my kids felt that way about
hurtful things about me — that their mom. Please give me some
I’m all about me, that it’s always advice. — Devastated Mom
my way or the highway. I took
Dear Devastated Mom:
that very personally. It made me Slow down and take a deep
cry. I never expected my
breath. This is a whirl-
DEAR
eldest son to say some-
wind, but it seems that at
thing or feel that way
the center of it all is your
ANNIE
about me. I took it as him
feeling of abandonment.
trying to hurt my feel-
I reckon that’s caused
ings. He needs to under-
you to lash out in ways
you might not recognize
stand that with the kids
as lashing out — with
all out of the house now,
guilt trips, for instance.
I do often feel that it is all
If you’ve been trying
about me. The house is
Lane
to get your kids to pay
empty; my two elder kids Annie
Creators
Syndicate Inc.
attention to you by mak-
don’t even call me to see
ing them feel bad, that
whether I’m OK or sick,
and I think that if I ever become has backfired. It’s time to stop
sick, I will keep it to myself and catastrophizing and start com-
not inform them. Am I wrong for municating. Talk to your chil-
dren. Tell them you didn’t real-
that?
Now I don’t feel comfortable ize how negatively they felt
even asking to see my grand- about your behavior. Ask what
children, because I fear it’s been you could do to be a bigger part
embedded in their minds that of their lives. And for everyone’s
Grandma is all about her and no sake, please stop posting about it
on Facebook.
one else.
Dear Annie: I know that some
I posted about this situation
on Facebook to see how every- people complain about “older”
one would respond and what trick-or-treaters in their neigh-
advice people might offer. A borhoods and that some people
co-worker came to me and com- even refuse to hand out candy to
kids who look older than 13.
In my view, it’s a fine line
between child and teen, and it’s
a difficult adjustment for most.
Teens still love some kids activ-
ities, yet they want to appear
grown-up. When we get older
kids ringing our doorbell on Hal-
loween, we always give them
double the candy and tell them
so. We also tell them that we’re
proud of them for choosing to
have fun. They are delighted
with our response, and you can
see the appreciation in their eyes.
Lighten up, people! They
have the rest of their lives to be
adults. Let them hang on to some
parts of their childhood a bit lon-
ger. And let the parents do the
parenting; it’s not our business.
Our grown children let their own
children know when it was time
to quit trick-or-treating.
It also doesn’t matter how
much, if any, care was put into
a costume. It’s rare when they’re
not in costume, though. Teens
are quite creative and enjoy our
noticing a costume. We love the
night. It’s fun! — Marie
Dear Marie: I’m printing this
just in time for Halloween. May
we all embrace such a fun-loving
spirit.
5A
TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE
By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc.
ARIES (March 21-April 19). Notice who
takes your feelings into consideration. Notice
who has your back. Notice who shows up,
who offers first, who laughs at your jokes.
You deserve a supportive team.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). The fever of a
retail crush, flirtation, love affair or seductive
business deal is not a good state of mind for
decision-making. The wanting makes you
think irrationally. Cool down first. Come back
to it tomorrow.
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). If you’re hesitant
about sharing things about yourself because
you think it might be too boring or you might
be opening yourself to judgment, it’s a sign
that you could use some more relatable
friends in your life.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). Family will
require more tending than usual. It’s a good
thing, because they need you and you need
to give, so all will feel better for it. Warmth is
your specialty.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Of course, memory
never tells the whole story. When looking
back, people get fuzzy on the details of
interacting with one another. What they tend
to remember is how you made them feel.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). It’s impossible
to be permanently excited. Excitement is
the top of an arc of energy. Without the low
of boredom or normalcy, there would be no
high of excitement. You’ll ride out an unevent-
ful period. A higher energetic state is coming.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). It’s a day of
many tones and feelings. You’ll pass through
numerous states of mind — twice as many
as you usually would in the course of a day.
It’s a kind of workout for your feelings. You’ll
FRANK AND ERNEST
BLONDIE
THATABABY
SALLY FORTH
PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN
B.C.
LOLA
DILBERT
SIX CHIX
BIZARRO
MUTTS
NON SEQUITUR
BABY BLUES
WIZARD OF ID
ZITS
ROSE IS ROSE
gain strength and balance.
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). A good story
is a family heirloom. A good storyteller is the
custodian of that treasure. Your heart and
mind are open. You’ll understand where the
story is in the seemingly everyday events of
you and yours.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). There’s
too much at stake to leave an interaction
to chance. Decide before going in what
impression and message you want to relay.
Get clear about what’s in it for you and what
you’re willing to give in return.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). As for
those who monopolize the conversation,
steamroll you when you’re trying to express
yourself and don’t ask for your thoughts and
ideas on the matter — well, it’s more than
selfishness. It’s a warning sign.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). You’re not
in the most sensible mood, but there are
some things that are better accomplished
from an irrational state. If you’re applying
yourself to the right endeavor, it will all work
out perfectly.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Don’t get too
disillusioned. When the beautiful picture
starts to crack as falsities are revealed, think
of it as another phase. Keep looking. Get in
closer until it’s lovely again.
TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (Nov. 1). Your
birthday will turn on a light in a far-reaching
corner of your mind. If you’ve been fulfilling
someone else’s dreams instead of your
own, that stops this year. In January, keep
studying or trying until you get your break-
through. Leo and Libra adore you. Your lucky
numbers are: 17, 4, 21, 19 and 42.