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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (Aug. 21, 2017)
THE DAILY ASTORIAN • MONDAY, AUGUST 21, 2017 FEATURES No compromising here Dear Annie: My husband and I ever decision you end up making, a are at an impasse. He wants to have loving, nurturing family is what you a fourth child; I want to stick with both want. Keep that front of mind three. We both have equally valid and you will have it. reasoning for our cases, and we Dear Annie: This is a plea for acknowledge each other’s points. adults to see their parents as they are Neither of us is budging. Whenever today and try to get beyond the past. we have had disagreements I am the mother of five DEAR in the past, we have found children and have one son ways to compromise and who wants to have almost ANNIE come to an agreement that nothing to do with me. He has satisfied us both. How- doesn’t allow me to spend ever, with this particular dis- time with my 1-year-old granddaughter. He always agreement, there is no com- says they have somewhere promise. Either we have a to go or something to do, fourth child or we do not. I but I know they can’t be am not writing to ask you to Lane going every moment of pick a side. My question is Annie Creators Syndicate Inc. every day. They bought this: How do my husband a home literally a minute and I come to a decision about a matter that is so black-and- away from mine, which makes this white and doesn’t have a gray area? even harder. It breaks my heart to not be able to be a part of his and my — Standoff in South Dakota Dear Standoff in South granddaughter’s lives. His father and I divorced when Dakota: You and your husband have built a foundation of under- the children were young. I admit standing, love and willingness to we stayed together longer than we compromise — a sturdy platform should and that wasn’t good for onto which a counselor or spiritual anyone, especially the kids. I know adviser could step and guide you the bad marriage and divorce hurt through this conversation. Even if everyone, and half of that was me. one of you were to bend and give in No one escapes those situations to the other’s preference, there could without some scars. I have a won- be lingering resentment, and talking derful relationship with my other it out would help clear the air. What- children, and I haven’t stopped try- ing with my son and pray he’ll give me a chance one day. For any readers out there who harbor anger or have issues with a parent: Please take the time to look at your parents today and real- ize they are human and make mis- takes. Think about how much they must love you to be hurt over and over again but never give up. Talk to them and tell them how you feel. Parents can’t read minds, and you’d be surprised how much they’d like to talk to you. I’d rather have my son yell and scream if that’s what it would take to get it out so we could work past this and have our family whole again. I learned this lesson later in life: Forgiveness is such a great gift. It frees you and brings peace to your life. I hope your readers will try to look at things differently and give their parents a chance. — Never Stop Loving Them Dear Never Stop Loving Them: Forgiveness is indeed a gift we give ourselves. Though it’s hard, I encourage you to keep allowing your son the space he needs. Give the problem over to God and let prayer lessen the pain. I hope that in time, he comes around and your lit- tle granddaughter becomes a bigger part of your life. 5A TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. ARIES (March 21-April 19). People who make you feel small while making them- selves feel big are, of course, toxic for you to be around. If you can’t stay away altogether, at least minimize your exposure. Firm bound- aries will be key. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). Not every day, but certainly today, it will be far more import- ant to take care of the practical matters than to concern yourself with the deeper or more mystical layers of existence. You can ponder and intuit after the storm has passed. knowledge on a subject that interests you. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). You’re in a mood to bounce around ideas — your favorite way to learn. While bandying about intellectual and philosophical concepts, keep in mind that not everyone likes to debate. Choose your company carefully. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). You are who you are because of what you’ve expe- rienced. It’s why you keep putting yourself in the mix, taking risks and making efforts: You’re brave. Courage is a lifestyle. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Good work is good work, no matter how humble or her- culean the task. There’s a victory rush that comes from doing a job to the best of your ability and knowing it’s not been done better. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). If you have to turn it into a competition, make yourself the opponent. The only nobility worth striving for is the kind where you top your finest effort thus far. CANCER (June 22-July 22). Between too much and too little is the wonderfully cozy waystation you’ll hang out in today. It’s made even more enjoyable by friends who are similarly satisfied. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). With so many people looking for somewhere to pass the blame, it’s important to note that blame never solves anything. It gets better once someone starts taking responsibility for it. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). If it’s fun but doesn’t make sense, consider it anyway. Even com- puters have evolved to incorporate illogical turns to serve the very human need for surprises and fun. A touch of irrationality will bring magic to your world. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Perhaps it seems counterintuitive that you would be in a position to teach what you don’t know, yet it happens all of the time. The added pressure of having to present information will make you learn super-quickly. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Remember when you felt helpless? If you could have only known that help was on its way, how much easier the moment would have passed. Remember the lesson. Trust that there are forces on your side. TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (Aug. 22). Many small matters will be cleared up right at the top of this solar return, and you’ll soon realize that you wield a transformational power. You will heal the ailing parts of your life with your heart, not your head. Your compassion and warmth will melt away the obstacles blocking your progress and happiness. Cancer and Libra adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 9, 44, 48, 20 and 18. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). You’ll be ener- gized by a steady and deliberate learning process. There is nothing more exciting to do with this day than to move from ignorance to FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE