THE DAILY ASTORIAN • TUESDAY, JUNE 13, 2017
FEATURES
TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE
The strain of caregiving
Dear Annie: I am an only sick with Alzheimer’s disease.
child. I have always been very As my mother’s own health
close to my mother. When started failing, she couldn’t do
my husband and I married, much and depended on me for
we got a house a few doors making every decision.
down from my parents’ house.
My father has passed
We would visit often
away, and my mother
DEAR
after my three children
is now 90 years old.
She lives in a retire-
came along. We have
ANNIE
unforgettable memo-
ment community and
is still autonomous
ries from those years.
enough to live on her
When we moved to the
own with supervi-
suburbs, my parents
sion. I have a social
visited every weekend.
worker designated for
My father played golf
her, but according to
nearby, so he would
Lane
the worker, my mom
drop off Mom early in Annie
Creators
Syndicate Inc.
is not at the point of
the morning and then
needing to be put in a
join her later in the day.
As the children grew and home. I have hired a cleaning
moved out of the house, my company for her apartment,
parents aged but kept coming but I do all her errands, as she
to the house every weekend. can hardly walk.
I now have lots of opportu-
By then, my husband and I
were looking forward to spend- nity to travel with my husband,
ing some time just the two of but I can’t, because every time
us. I tried discussing it with I go away, my mother gets
my mother, but it was very dif- sick and ends up in the hospi-
ficult, as they had never built a tal. She has had many minor
life of their own; they had no strokes caused by anxiety. Her
one but us. I tried spacing out doctor, who is well aware of
their visits more and more, but the situation, closely monitors
her. I now leave for only a few
it was really hard.
Soon after, my father fell days at a time and have calls
5A
By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc.
to my home phone forwarded
to my cellphone so she is not
aware I am gone and not at
home.
I am also getting old and
tired and would like to enjoy
the few healthy years I have
left but don’t know how. As
much as I love her, I am begin-
ning to resent her and feel the
burden weigh on my shoul-
ders. What can I do? — Tired
Loving Daughter
Dear Tired: If caretakers
don’t have enough room to
breathe, the light they shine on
others will be snuffed out. The
best thing for you and your
relationship with your mom is
to give yourself more space.
Invest time in self-care; take
those trips with your husband.
If you don’t, resentment will
embitter you. Visit the Family
Caregiver Alliance website, at
https://www.caregiver.org, for
information on resources and
support groups.
You have already done so
much. Though your mother
may not be in a place to ver-
bally express it, you are a
steadfast friend and compas-
sionate daughter.
ARIES (March 21-April 19). Today’s conun-
drum: If you act out of a desire to make your-
self happy you will wind up suffering instead.
Act out of a desire to benefit others and your
eyes will be opened to the opportunities in the
situation.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). The adrenaline
rush that comes with feeling passionate about
someone can be addictive. That feeling is
short-lived, though, and you’ve learned to
anticipate the mellow follow-up.
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). You continue to
be in high demand. Don’t automatically accept
other people’s timetables as your own. Take
control of your schedule and your attention.
Consider changing the notification settings on
your phone.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). You’d like to
believe you are in control of your opinion of
yourself, but unhealthy relationships do have a
way of eroding self-esteem, and healthy ones
have the opposite effect. How is a relationship
helping or hurting you?
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Whenever you feel im-
patient, the fundamental problem is an internal
one, namely a belief that the world needs to
operate differently to accommodate you. You’ll
love what happens when you stay measured
and calm instead.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). No moment is
inherently more perfect than another, though
certainly there are moments that are more
memorable and/or personally satisfying to a
particular ego. Just don’t expect such things to
be universal.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). You’ll be called to a
role or responsibility. Your service to the group
comes with some tedium, but the work will go
FRANK AND ERNEST
BLONDIE
THATABABY
SALLY FORTH
PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN
B.C.
LOLA
DILBERT
SIX CHIX
BIZARRO
MUTTS
NON SEQUITUR
BABY BLUES
WIZARD OF ID
ZITS
ROSE IS ROSE
by quickly. Besides, it’s better than the alterna-
tive: being left out of things.
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Your heart will
soften, and you’ll feel more for the whole world,
not just for the main object of your affection.
The love you give will in turn make you more
lovable.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). You and
your group are in it together. Keep up the good
communication and you’ll be able to rely on
each other to do what no individual could do
alone.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). You’ll find
the behavior of loved ones to be less than
optimum. The frustration comes when you
think you can control this. You can’t, but as you
learn to skillfully modify your reactions, things
will change.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). From the
outsider view a lot of what you’ll do today
won’t make sense, but you know perfectly why
it has to happen the way it does. You’ll teach
someone, too.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). The answer to
a business problem will be found in another
business entirely. The secrets to solving a mys-
tery in your own life will be present in someone
else’s life.
TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (June 14). This
busy solar year shows you building, re-building
and making moves. You’ll be surrounded by
enthusiastic and loving supporters. There’s
opportunity for a savvy investment in July. Sep-
tember will bring new subjects of study and
among them one so fascinating it may begin
a passion you’ll follow for years. Cancer and
Capricorn adore you. Your lucky numbers are:
20, 2, 4, 44 and 18.