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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (May 3, 2017)
THE DAILY ASTORIAN • WEDNESDAY, MAY 3, 2017 FEATURES The forgotten parents Dear Annie: I am writ- father. I hope that they see ing because another Moth- themselves in this letter and er’s Day will soon be upon do a gut check. Their father us and, once again, my grown loves them very much, but stepchildren — who were he is accustomed to not being grown and on their own when included, so he hides his pain their parents divorced — will from them. Since we mar- ignore me. Every ried, he has leaned DEAR year, they celebrate more on me, seeing Mother’s Day without as they don’t ever ANNIE thinking of me at all. call him just to chat. I That wouldn’t hurt call my dad regularly, so much if I could and my husband was write it off as just my astounded when he being a stepparent — learned that. I hurt but every Father’s for him and for them Day, they include because they have no Lane their stepfather in the Annie idea how they hurt us, Creators Syndicate Inc. celebration. and we will never let them know. Many other times, Is it asking too much to be they share with their mother and stepfather whatever news included in their news? We they have — a new vehi- share our news with them and cle they bought, the name of don’t leave them out, as far as their unborn baby, etc. Their I can tell. They are very fami- father and I do eventually ly-oriented, just not with their learn most news, but it’s usu- dad. — Midwestern Step- ally long after the fact. We all mother Loving Them From get along, and there is abso- the Outside Dear Midwestern: The lutely no animosity at all among any of us; we love sentence that most struck me them, and we both love the in your letter was this: “They former in-laws. All I ask is for have no idea how they hurt them to treat their father as us, and we will never let them well as they treat their step- know.” Your husband hides his pain from them, so for all they know, he’s fine with talking only once in a while. They may even think he pre- fers it that way. This is the sta- tus quo they’re used to, and until you take the initiative to call more and speak up about your wish to be included, your stepchildren will con- tinue in their current pattern. So shake up the routine. Call them often. Invite them to visit, and go visit them. Let them know how much you value the time together. Dear Annie: This is in response to “Distracted by His Distraction,” who is both- ered by her long-term part- ner’s wandering eyes when- ever they’re out together. Maybe the only way her part- ner will get the message is if she does likewise — sets her eyes and attention on a hand- some man in the restaurant. — CR in New York Dear CR: Not a bad idea. I’m not normally an advo- cate of the eye-for-an-eye approach, but in this case, perhaps “Distracted” would do well to illustrate her point with an ogle for an ogle. 5A TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. ARIES (March 21-April 19). Children playing on the playground often don’t have to have the rules clearly explained to them. They just join in with a willing spirit and soon absorb the rhythm of the game, much like you will today. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). Music carries emotion, teases it out, adds layers of the stuff to the moments, charges memory, invigorates, exhausts, confounds, comforts and changes you. That’s why it’s worth your while to choose your own soundtrack. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). You’d be wise to pause and decide very carefully how you’re go- ing to interact with loved ones today. Negativity will be difficult to get past. It will take at least five positive interactions to nullify even one slightly negative interaction. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Society pre- fers it when personal information can be neatly categorized. Today you’ll find yourself toying with different ways to frame information to find the most socially palatable presentation. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). You’re not the only subject in the experiment called life, but when you’re alone in your room it certainly feels that way. Connect with the others. Share data. You’ll mess around with the outcome in a good way today. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). To be grateful for circumstances you do not prefer might seem like setting up an internal diametric opposition — akin to tipping well for bad service. And yet, finding something to appreciate in a mess will attract good luck. CANCER (June 22-July 22). You’ll lead with your courage-filled heart today. It’s not always wise to be brave, and yet if everyone were to stop and dwell upon the possible consequenc- es, there wouldn’t be any heroes among us. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). For friendship, love and even certain business decisions, a mental match is essential. If you don’t like how a person thinks, you’re not going to want to share your ideas, plans and daily doings with that person on the regular. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). When you’re not getting anywhere by looking at the problem head on, you cock your head to the side and suddenly you have a new slant on it. Bonus: Your bril- liance will be celebrated by those smart enough to get you. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). You don’t want to spend your time fake laughing. No one does! And today you won’t have to. Someone can make you laugh for real, and that humor-click will set off a lucky chain of events. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). When you love someone, flaws are part of the package. A ma- ture person recognizes that trying to extract the flawed parts in order to love only the suitable parts isn’t really love at all. FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). There was a time you enjoyed the escape of dreaming you were someone else. Currently, you find that loving who you are creates far more energy in your life. TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (May 4). The love you receive over the course of this solar return will lift your spirits and fill your reserves until you have even more to give than you ever did. Also, a special relationship will teach you to tune into others even better than you already do. You’ll win money this month. June and August represent big professional opportunity. Leo and Scorpio adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 6, 40, 5, 38 and 18.