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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (April 19, 2017)
6A FEATURES When HR is the problem Dear Annie: We work in a small dry is having an unnerving effect office with just over 20 employ- on everyone. — Unrepresented ees. It has recently become com- Dear Unrepresented: Shame mon knowledge that the human on these two for letting their dirty resources manager, “Melissa,” is laundry stink up the whole office. sleeping with the principal in our They should know better. Melis- firm, “Larry.” Throughout her eight sa’s job as the HR representative years with this private is to regulate fraterniza- DEAR firm, the closed-door hud- tion, not engage in it. If dles were always viewed there is anyone above or ANNIE as suspect, but they were equal to Larry’s ranking, both married, and those of anonymously report your us näive enough to assume concerns. If Larry doesn’t the best hoped that it was recognize the error of his professional. The time- ways yet, he’ll soon see the consequences unfold line is fuzzy, but Melissa’s throughout the company. divorce seemed to follow Lane the beginning of the now Annie Such unsavory behavior is Creators Syndicate Inc. toxic to morale. three-year affair by about a year. Larry’s divorce is not Dear Annie: I just read the letter from “Lonesome,” the yet final. Regardless, Melissa has never 52-year-old man who thinks it’s too been seen as an effective HR repre- late for him. Just over a year ago, I sentative. There are several reasons was in the same kind of situation. for that, but it’s mainly because of My caregiving role was gone. I felt her obvious familiarity with Larry. lonely and emotionally drained. With the revelation of their affair, I believed that no one would ever she’s lost all remaining credibility love me. I thought about suicide. in her role. Is there a standard of Then I decided to make one last ethics for an HR department? It’s a desperate attempt at happiness — department of one, so where should but because everything I’d done we employees turn with an issue in the past hadn’t worked for me, that clearly could not be handled I chose to do something differ- by her with an unbiased, disentan- ent. Instead of focusing on being gled perspective? Their dirty laun- so sweet and kind that someone would fall in love with me and res- cue me from my dreadful, boring, dull existence, I would focus on rescuing myself. And I did. Mr. Old Man at 52, stop waiting for someone else to make your life good. Get up and do something you enjoy, whatever you wanted to try in the past but didn’t. Smile. Laugh when something strikes you as funny. Become someone you like. You can meet a lot of people in your lifetime. Some will like you; some will not. From a wom- an’s point of view, I can tell you with absolute assurance that the most attractive men are those who are interested in their own lives, because those men have lives worth living, with or without a mate. Such a man does not burden a woman with the task of making him happy. I understand that after doing all that caring, you might feel hurt that no one is now caring for you in the same way. Give the care to your- self that you would give to a close friend if the friend needed you the way you need someone. — Been There Dear Been: I appreciate your self-empowered perspective. All your suggestions are great advice for anyone at any point in life. THE DAILY ASTORIAN • WEDNESDAY, APRIL 19, 2017 TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. ARIES (March 21-April 19). Just because something looks cool doesn’t make it cool — but it’s half the battle. Your work’s success hangs in the balance of a kind of seduction. Give equal weight to style and content for the win. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). You’ll be pleased by the logical and linear nature of today’s challenges; a very satisfying and solvable puzzle lies before you. Each solu- tion will be the first clue to the next problem. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). If you keep mak- ing allowances, you’ll bankrupt the project, fall short of the goal or possibly not even move the needle at all. So don’t give yourself any loopholes. Be strict. CANCER (June 22-July 22). You won’t be able to keep yourself from fear. If you tell yourself to relax and calm down it will only make you more anxious. Invite the fear in. Make room for it; make friends with it. Fear will soon dissipate and lose its power. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). The dancer believes that the soul is exposed in the dance. The artist believes it’s in the lines; the writer reads it in words. Today, you’ll see the soul revealed in daily life and gain deep insights into yourself and others. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). The more you have to talk yourself into something, the stronger the likelihood is that it’s a terrible, horrible, no-good idea. At best, it’s a waste of time you could spend doing almost anything else, including napping. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). You thought about it in a radical way back when you were new. Now that you’re experienced, you un- derstand the nuances and will hold a more FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE conservative viewpoint. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Reciprocity is a tenet you live by. If you won’t be able to return a favor, you won’t take anyone up on it in the first place. Just remember that you don’t always have to give back the same thing, just something of equal value. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). What’s unfair to one person is unfair to all. Standing up for another person’s rights is standing up for your own. Those who lack empathy will prove to be, in the long run, unfortunate company. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). Of your many dreaded dangers, very few are reason- able; even fewer are probable. Quite likely, the number of these fears that will come to anything is approximately zero. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). You like to do good works anonymously. Charitable acts are humble acts. If it has to be publicized, it’s more a matter of pride and identity-shaping than heart and generosity. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). It does seem to be the case that, on certain days, your chances of winning the game are the same whether your play or not. However, that’s not the point. Play. Winning isn’t everything. TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (April 20). You’ve a playful heart this solar journey, but you’ll still get some serious business accom- plished over the next 10 weeks. New people enter your personal life, and you’ll partici- pate in a lot of teamwork. There’s a creative venture in July and travel in October. This is not a year for financial risk. Save instead. Cancer and Capricorn adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 13, 30, 25, 50 and 11.