6A
FEATURES
How can I get out of a slump?
Dear Annie: My husband of stroke, fell and broke his ribs, and
44 years passed away from com- fell off his four-wheeler and broke
plications of Alzheimer’s disease. his hip. He also ended up in the
I cared for him at home for years. hospital twice last year because
He was 79 when he passed away; of his drinking. He told me that he
I was 71. We were extremely close loved me and always would.
and had a wonderful life together.
One day, he told me he was
beginning to feel smoth-
Sometime after my
DEAR
husband’s passing, a
ered by our relationship
and felt it was best we
friend whom I had dated
ANNIE
in high school got in
not talk so much. I was
touch with me. He asked
shocked. I had given him
whether he could drive
a Bible and devotional
over for a short visit. I
books and invested time
finally consented. He is
in him hoping he would
divorced and has two
get his life straightened
children. We became
out.
Lane
friends again, and he vis- Annie
He wants to keep stay-
Creators
Syndicate Inc.
ing in contact. It makes
ited again. He called, tex-
me uncomfortable, and
ted and was very attentive
overall. I met his children and vis- I feel that he lies often, as I have
caught him in several lies. He said
ited with them.
But then he wouldn’t call he didn’t want to lose me. I think
for days, even though he said he he is narcissistic and thinks it’s
would. When I didn’t hear, I was fine to call when he wants to, and I
genuinely concerned. Eventually, don’t think he wants to have to be
I found out he was drinking. As there for me when I want to talk. I
time passed, his behavior changed. see a pattern with him. He does it
He became critical of little things, to others, too.
I can’t believe I didn’t see what
insinuating that he liked me better
when I didn’t have my glasses on type of person he is. What can I do
or commenting that he noticed that to get myself out of the slump I am
my arthritis caused me not to get in? I have had other men invite me
to go places, but I have no desire
around as well, etc.
In the meantime, he had a mini to date.
I did see a counselor for a
while, but she has retired. She
used to say he’s “a drunk” who
won’t get any better until he does
something about his drinking.
I do have many friends and am
fortunate, although lately, I have
withdrawn from others. I know
this is not good or normal. What
do you suggest? — Feeling Guilty
and Remorseful
Dear Feeling: Until he gets
his life straightened out, this man
is not fit to be anyone’s romantic
partner — especially not yours, as
you seem to have the type of per-
sonality to want to care for and
fix broken people. Though that
desire is admirable in and of itself,
it steps perfectly in time with the
dance of addiction. You always
rescue him, and he always gives
you more rescue missions. That
you’re withdrawing from others
is a sign of codependence. You
need to quit the relationship cold
turkey.
Force yourself to spend time
with friends, even if you don’t feel
like it yet. If counseling was help-
ful to you, find a new counselor.
The good news is that you seem
to have a handle on the situation
already. Now you just need to start
steering.
THE DAILY ASTORIAN • THURSDAY, APRIL 6, 2017
TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE
By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc.
ARIES (March 21-April 19). It will be a pret-
ty ordinary day until you suddenly get a very
palpable feeling of generosity. You’ll give
something that matters to you greatly. You’ll
give something that makes a difference.
today than you were yesterday. You’ll accept
it and move accordingly. Like a drummer
settling into a favorite beat, you’ll hit your
groove.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). You might
have to root around for something to look
forward to. It’s sad that you have to look this
hard; then again, your options will be better
because you made the effort.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). It’s been
suggested that the present moment is all
we ever have. But isn’t that a lot of pressure,
really? What about the less impulsive peo-
ple around who need time to process and
frame things?
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). You’re not
always your own best babysitter. Enlist the
care of others. The influence of someone
you admire will keep you accountable to
goals that would not be reached otherwise.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). You don’t
want to interrupt people, and yet you’re
going to have to. Your message is important.
Your purpose is strong. Go ahead and say
what you need to say.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). You want a
place that shines from ceiling to floor. Bonus
benefit: With each sweeping gesture of the
broom, cobwebs of your mind will be simul-
taneously whisked away.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). You’ve a
need to gripe about what’s been bothering
you. Once you get it off of your mind, the
stress will be over. The key is speaking to
the right people — discreet people who
won’t give it another thought.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Fix it. Fix it! It needs
fixing and you’re the one to do it. “How?” is
the question. You won’t know the answer,
but your sincere intention is nearly enough
to fix it all.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). You are
super-capable. You have more energy than
others, and you don’t mind doing extra work.
This is why you become the superstar of
your group today, a well-earned scenario.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). You identify with
a group, but not in all regards. Differentiate.
If you align yourself falsely, it will cause
problems down the line. Clarify. Take a
stand.
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). If you were
wrong, it only means that you are wiser
FRANK AND ERNEST
BLONDIE
THATABABY
SALLY FORTH
PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN
B.C.
LOLA
DILBERT
SIX CHIX
BIZARRO
MUTTS
NON SEQUITUR
BABY BLUES
WIZARD OF ID
ZITS
ROSE IS ROSE
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). It’s said that
nothing considered is lost. If you thought
about it, it had an effect. It meant something.
And the same goes for the art you made
that didn’t have the intended impact. It still
did something. Move on and grow.
TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (April 7). To
some, silence is a hobby. Consider it yours
and this year will have a magical tint to it.
There is something so wonderful about
what you find in your own mind this solar
return. You will do the thing that the others
can’t. In June you will be the reason a whole
system is changed. In May it becomes
about something else. Cancer and Capri-
corn adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 9,
30, 4, 7 and 17.