THE DAILY ASTORIAN • TUESDAY, MARCH 28, 2017 FEATURES Past abuse stalls dating Dear Annie: I’m a selor, which has helped me 46-year-old woman who has greatly, but we never discuss been married (and divorced) healthy sexual relationships; twice. Both marriages were we just discuss the past abuse. filled with abuse — physical, — Ready to Start Over emotional and sexual. Add Dear Ready: I’m so to that severe child abuse — sorry you’ve experienced so which has me per- much abuse through- DEAR manently disabled out your life, but I’m also inspired by your now — and, well, I’m ANNIE scared to be intimate positive attitude. I’m with anyone ever confident you’ll find again. someone out there who is worthy of your I’ve been on two time, and he’ll be a dates in the past 13 lucky man indeed. years. I’m finally But before then, you getting to the point Lane really need to discuss where I like myself Annie Creators Syndicate Inc. with your counselor and am considering how past abuse has dating again (if any- one will want to date a mid- impacted your current rela- dle-aged disabled woman). tionship with sex. He or she But I know that if I find some- may even be able to refer you one I want to marry, the rela- to a sex therapist who special- tionship will have to involve izes in working with victims sex. It’s been 13 years since I of past abuse. A counselor’s last had sex. And for the seven office is a safe space that’s years prior, it was forced sex, free of judgment, and this is never consensual on my part. exactly the type of thing a Do you have any sugges- counselor is there for. You’re only 46. You still tions? Right now, the thought of sexual intercourse terrifies have decades of fun ahead of me. It’s certainly not an issue you. Hang in there, and keep now, but it will be when I start striving to open your heart. Dear Annie: I appreci- dating again. I do see a coun- ate your empathetic and help- ful responses to those who write to you. Recently, you responded to “Frustrated Friend,” who was having dif- ficulty with someone who talks incessantly and does not allow any comments. I am an experienced men- tal health professional and wonder whether you consid- ered that someone who can- not stop talking may be in a manic phase of bipolar affec- tive disorder. There is no way of reasoning with or even interrupting people who are exhibiting these symptoms. They should be under the care of a psychiatrist. Medication is the first treatment of choice, followed by counseling. — A Licensed Clinical Social Worker in Sarasota, Fla. Dear LCSW: Thank you for raising this import- ant point. I hadn’t considered that it could be something that serious, but it’s possible and, at the very least, worth exploring. I’m printing your letter here so that “Frustrated Friend” might consider help- ing her friend seek psycho- logical help. 5A TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. ARIES (March 21-April 19). As you interact with the people around you today, you’ll recog- nize that this is not your average crew. There will be enormous rewards for your gracious management of a wide swath of traits, talents, crotchets and flaws. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). It’s not that you want your life to look like a magazine. But that might be the end result as you seek a sense of physical, visual and emotional harmony in your environment. Much will be achieved to this end. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). People will ask you the questions they wish you would ask them. Therefore, don’t waste your time trying to craft the right answer. Instead, turn it around and quickly get to the point of the discourse. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). History is like a purse you can rummage through to find useful information and tools, such as lenses that will change the way you see your world. Just remember that the past is for remember- ing or discovering, not for living in. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Can you keep your original shape under the crushes of confor- mity? Well, you’re not sure that you’d want to do so. Today, you will mostly be enriched by the influence of others. You’re too strong to be changed very much anyway. CANCER (June 22-July 22). An interesting story will become even more compelling today. The thrill you get from learning will override any initial fear or self-consciousness you may feel in asking questions. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Being too involved with a person or project causes distortions of reality; intimate knowledge of the minutiae blinds you to the big picture. Paradoxically, you’ll have to step back in order to get closer. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Make the choice that feels right. You don’t know where it will lead, and right now, no one will tell you. Unlike a jealous sibling who might spoil a surprise meant for you, the universe wants to delight in your startling glee. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). When you are in love, no words, no touch, no eyes and no em- brace can match those of your beloved. You’ll find yourself in a similar “no substitutions” situation today. FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). Information carries no special quality within itself. It has to be put to use to impact the world. If it is ig- nored, it may as well not exist. For this reason, today, you’ll be sure to act on what you know. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). It will be better to connect your ideas than to protect them. The involvement of supporters and challeng- ers will speed up and sharpen your process. Together you will leap forward, creating greatness. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Going with the flow is a specialty of yours, but not today. There is a rebel inside you digging heels into the dirt. No one can move you from this place. You and you alone will decide when to go. TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (March 29). You are greatly and widely beloved. You’ll influence many in a quiet, persistent way. It’s about what you stand for. There’s no ego in your work. You’re devoted to furthering a particular principle or way of operating. Your best finan- cial move may be illogical — you’ll just feel it. There will be windfalls in July and November. Cancer and Virgo adore you. Your lucky num- bers are: 7, 42, 21, 29 and 38.