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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (March 8, 2017)
6A FEATURES Friend just won’t shut up Dear Annie: I have a friend suppressing or avoiding bother- of over 20 years who has some thoughts or feelings. Others talk excessively sim- become such a motormouth that I have begun to avoid contact. ply because they think everyone She talks nonstop. If I call her, will be fascinated by their sto- she immediately launches into a ries or because they feel they’re marathon monologue, and try- not really being heard. You can try setting time limits ing to break in with a DEAR on your conversations. comment doesn’t work. (“I’d like to talk, but I I once decided to let her ANNIE only have 10 minutes talk until she ran out for this call. Then I need of things to say. Five to get back to work.”) hours later, she was still You might also try talking without coming interrupting her, sum- up for air, and I said I marizing to her what had to go somewhere you’ve understood so and hung up. Lane far and then leading that I try to tell her this, Annie Creators Syndicate Inc. thought toward a con- but she just gets angry. clusion. Ultimately, set I know that other peo- ple and even some her family whatever boundaries you need, members have distanced them- and don’t feel guilty. Our time selves because of this. I hate to on this earth is precious, and no drop her, but I see no other solu- one should have to sit through a five-hour marathon monologue. tion. — Frustrated Friend Dear Frustrated: Because In that time, you could have run you said she’s “become” a an actual marathon. Dear Annie: I’d like to motormouth, I’m assuming she hasn’t always been one. Try to respond to “Feeling So Bad,” dig deeper when you can get the woman who was upset that a word in edgewise; she has her friend “Nancy” had passed to breathe at some point. Try away and the friend’s hus- to see whether there are some band, “Bill,” hadn’t filled her underlying issues. Some peo- in. Her husband, according to ple talk excessively as a way of the writer, limited visits to his THE DAILY ASTORIAN • WEDNESDAY, MARCH 8, 2017 TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. wife during her terminal ill- ness. My wife, too, was diag- nosed with a terminal and rare cancer. She, for some reason, felt embarrassment and shame, which I since have learned is completely normal. My wife didn’t want to be talked about, didn’t want to be seen with a wig or a scarf around her bald head and so forth. My orders from her were that no one was allowed to visit or drop by at all. I did just as she said because meeting her needs during this awful time was more import- ant to me (and to her) than wor- rying about our neighbors and friends. Indeed, other than our trips to and from treatment, she shut herself in the house. “Feel- ing So Bad” need not be upset. I suspect that “Nancy” told “Bill” that she wanted to deal with her sickness in her own way. I’ve learned that there is no right or wrong way to deal with the pro- cess of death. — B.R. Dear B.R.: I appreci- ate hearing the perspective of someone who has such a per- sonal experience with this issue, and it may bring “Feeling So Bad” some peace, too. Thank you for sharing. ARIES (March 21-April 19). Comfort is loose clothes and tight relationships. It feels good and cozy, until it doesn’t. Because comfort is a little messy, and it can get too comfortable, too messy. When that line is crossed, comfort changes to discomfort. will be regrettable. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). Energy cannot be destroyed, only transformed. You have been a part of many transformations that you are con- scious of and many more that you are not. Today, change will occur around you, through you and because of you. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). The bottom line is that the very predictability that would make you feel secure would also bring a level of boredom so severe it could be classified as dangerous. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Your social nature is amplified today. You like to get to know people, which of course is very different from trying to figure out “their deal” so you can offer advice and fix it (like some you know). GEMINI (May 21-June 21). The one skill that has the greatest potential to enhance (or ruin) your life is the skill of knowing how to find good relationships and avoid bad ones. Most people are not born knowing this skill. Study and thrive. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). Just when you thought you knew where you were going, a fog descends and the destination cannot be clearly seen. This is when you have to trust your map, engage your senses at a higher level and proceed with caution. CANCER (June 22-July 22). What you believe about people is what you know about them. It’s hard to learn differently. All your questions and observations will follow the prior belief. Drop preconceived notions to the extent that you can, and ask again. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). You’ll see the big picture today. For better or worse, the world is on a fast track to change and your role within it is changing, too, as you see new ways to help, contribute and get what you need from it. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Let the others coast down Easy Street while you take the mountain pass. Challenging work is good for your mind, body and soul. Not to mention, you’re extremely attractive to others as you take it on. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). In the words of the inimitable Talking Heads, “You may ask yourself, how did I get here?” You can bet that any answer you come up with will oversimplify things, but it’s still good to ask. This will inform your next move. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). When you like someone but you can’t put your finger on the reason why, give yourself a little shake and then try to reason it out. Relationships (business or otherwise) based solely on a person’s charisma FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Maybe some- times it’s beneficial to your creative spirit to reason about unreasonable things. Today it’s rather pointless. If the problem is logical, solve it through logic. And if it’s not, feel your way through. TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (March 9). The love you give will be so sweetly received and redoubled. A trip you take before June will be magical. There’s an exciting change in your professional life in April. One good relationship could change the whole trajectory. There’s good fortune to be mined in familial events. Together you’ll build something unique. Capricorn and Cancer adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 2, 5, 33, 17 and 21.
