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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (Dec. 20, 2016)
6A FEATURES Is gratitude endangered? Dear Annie: I am writing about of information may open a door. However, it has created a prob- common courtesy. Does it exist lem. I recently sent an article that anymore? I have a large family, with grown pertained to my son’s profession. grandchildren, and I still work part I thought it might be interesting time, although I am close to 80. I to him. Although I knew that he would like to complain about the might not agree with all of the con- tent, he rejected the arti- lack of respect the younger DEAR cle in its entirety and chas- generation has. tised me profusely for I am a constant reader ANNIE sending it to him, saying — books, magazines, that it “offended” him. I newspaper, etc. When I reread it after the fact and come across an article, could find nothing that story or email that relates was offensive to anyone; to the profession, interests it was just giving another or community of anyone in point of view. He probably my family, I may cut it out Lane thought that I was trying and send it to the person. I Annie Creators Syndicate Inc. to convince him of some- may also forward an email thing, but that has never if it is pertinent. For example, one of my grand- been my intention. I am now very sons, even though he is 6 feet 4 hesitant to send him anything. Additionally, there is a little inches tall, wants to build a tiny house. I discovered a related arti- effort involved in sending the items to them; however, I have never cle, which I sent to him. My mother used to do the same received any form of acknowl- thing for me, and even though the edgment from any of my children clips may not have been something or grandchildren. I never receive that really interested me, the ges- a Christmas or birthday card from ture told me that she was thinking my 10 grandchildren, and they do of me and she wanted to pass along not thank me for Christmas gifts. Is it wrong to expect some form some information that might prove useful. I am not trying to influence of an acknowledgment when I give anyone, but I believe that you learn something to them, or is that a thing something every day, and one piece of the past? Do I stop sending arti- cles and birthday cards to them? Do I stop giving? Do I stop caring? — Disheartened in Florida Dear Disheartened: It’s good to take a step back, before you send any kind of message, and think of any possible ways the person on the receiving end might misinter- pret it. The article you sent to your son made him feel defensive, either because there’s a contentious his- tory between you two about the topic or because he’s a hypersensi- tive person. In any case, let him know that you were not coming from a judg- mental place. If he knows he has your support, he should be less touchy in the future. Now, as for the lack of gratitude for gifts you’ve sent, it’s unkind, and you should feel free to tell your children how that has hurt you. But don’t let their rudeness keep you from shining your light into the world. As inspirational speaker Kent Keith said, “People are illog- ical, unreasonable, and self-cen- tered. Love them anyway. If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives. Do good anyway. ... Give the world the best you have and you’ll get kicked in the teeth. Give the world the best you have anyway.” THE DAILY ASTORIAN • TUESDAY, DECEMBER 20, 2016 TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. ARIES (March 21-April 19). Unlike bears, cougars and sasquatches, humans are social animals who are best suited to spending time in groups. This is where you’ll find the greatest satisfaction today — among a small number of kindred spirits. Enjoy! TAURUS (April 20-May 20). To adopt the disguise necessary for “fitting in” is to deny the real you. So don’t worry about fitting in or not. Honor who you are and you’ll find you can get comfortable in many different situations. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Not all stress is harmful, especially if you don’t think of it as such. You can make stress work for you today. That’s what it’s there for, after all. When you hit that tense moment think: “This is happen- ing so that I can ...” CANCER (June 22-July 22). The direct route to making friends is often, oddly, not as effective as other ways. But as you decide what else you want in your life and act on that, you’ll get human contact as a bonus side effect. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). You believe in the value of what you’re doing. Hold on to that as you go. Sometimes your action will be popular, sometimes it won’t. Don’t worry about how you’re being seen or thought of or experienced by others. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Hypothetical scenarios rarely play out like real life. To get the twists, turns and thrills, you have to throw your whole self in, not just your mind and imagination. It is only through interacting with others that you’ll find out who you are. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Remember when you didn’t afford someone the benefit of the doubt, and you turned out to be wrong? FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE This memory will play into today’s scenario. Anyway, now you’d rather be wrong and kind than right and unkind. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). In general, you just want to lighten up, and this can be accomplished in a number of ways. Take the pressure off of your to-do list. Get more help. Take breaks to visit and laugh. It’s the practical things. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). As much as you try, there are no guarantees that you can control your experience so you won’t suffer. And yet, it is often the case that when you don’t try, you don’t suffer, either. It’s more like a ride. You let go and enjoy it. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). It’s easy to point out how things could have been done better. But to initiate an action and follow through, this is the proof. You’ll show your integrity and strong character at every turn. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). The time for thinking about it is over. Decide. Are you will- ing to take the risks necessary to getting what you want? In order to get the fruit, you have to go out on the limb. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). You work in the world of the mind, and you play in the world of the heart. One person brings these two worlds together for you, and that’s a beautiful relationship, certainly one to be appreciated and celebrated now. TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (Dec. 21). You’ll put a great deal of yourself into your friendships, and one special relationship will create many opportunities for adventure and financial gain throughout 2017. You’ll win a contest in February. Your lucky numbers are: 4, 17, 20, 31 and 22.
