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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (Oct. 12, 2016)
FEATURES 6A Fear is grounding wife Dear Annie: My wife is ter- riied of lying. Always has been. Back when we were deciding on a honeymoon destination, I con- vinced her we should try Hawaii — and she spent the light so on edge that it must have taken years off her life. I felt terrible. It was the last time she went on a plane. That was 15 years ago. Her phobia hasn’t interfered too much with our lives up until now. We live within driving distance of all her extended family members. The issue has to do with my parents, who live out of state. They used to come visit us once a year, and I’d usually ly out to see them once a year on my own or with one of our kids. But they’re get- ting older, and traveling is becom- ing more dificult for them. I would really like my wife to visit them with me at least once a year. She loves my parents, but she’s so petri- ied of lying that she doesn’t even consider it an option. Do you have any tips to help calm the nerves of an anxious lier? Or should I give up trying to con- vince her? — Grounded Dear Grounded: It’s time to ground your wife’s nerves. Try to talk to her about what it is she is so Dear Annie By Annie Lane Creators Syndicate Inc. afraid of. Is it the actual lying or that she might have a panic attack on the plane? Inquiring about her fears will help her feel supported and more connected to you. After she opens up, she might consider trying hypnotherapy, which some formerly anxious li- ers swear by. Cognitive behav- ioral therapy, which asks people to examine their thoughts and the evidence (or lack thereof) that they have for their thoughts, is another option. If you still can’t get her to agree to planes, there are always trains and automobiles. Although a road trip requires more time off work, who knows? Maybe the trav- eling time would be a great bond- ing experience for you and your wife. Dear Annie: I get so many return address labels in the mail that I could wallpaper my whole house with them! I did not ask for them, and I don’t need them. They are such a waste. Could you please print the contact info for the ofice that people can call to get their names off these lists? You will be doing a lot of us a great service. — Spammed Dear Spammed: The Direct Marketing Association is a trade organization comprising thousands of businesses that send direct mail. In the interest of placating the pub- lic, DMA built a website, DMA- choice.org, that lets you adjust set- tings to receive less or different promotional mail. In addition, register with Cat- alogChoice (https://www.cata- logchoice.org), whose stated mis- sion is “to stop junk mail for good.” Another such nonproit is 41pounds.org, named for the amount of junk mail the aver- age American receives each year. There is no central database with which you can register to stop receiving all junk mail forever, but by dovetailing these free services, you can cancel a good amount of unwanted mail, reclaiming your inbox and sanity. THE DAILY ASTORIAN • WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 12, 2016 Tomorrow’s horoscope By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. ARIES (March 21-April 19). You do cha- risma today like you were raised in charm school, with a dash of spice that lets them know you most certainly weren’t. It’s all working for you now, so enjoy! TAURUS (April 20-May 20). There are those around you who will be indignant in the face of the fallen, blaming them for their own folly. Does the blame really matter? To stretch out a hand to the one on the ground is among the finest instincts of humanity. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). When you want something but don’t take the action necessary to bring it into being, well ... you probably don’t want it very badly. Go back to that original desire. Touch it and test it. Poke it and prod it until it tells you about itself. CANCER (June 22-July 22). The way you see it, there’s no such thing as good art or bad art. It either speaks to your soul and brings you pleasure or it doesn’t. In the case of the latter, just because it’s not for you doesn’t mean that it’s not for anyone. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). You’re ever aware of other people’s attention spans. This is practically inherent — a secret and rare sense for timing and a talent for making your message shorter and more interesting than was expected. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Today you’ll lump yourself in with the group, talk about “our” issues and explore what “we” can do as a team. It’s not a sales technique as far as you’re concerned; you really care about this thing that you’re all in together. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). It’s easy for you to find beauty in your surroundings these days. Others may not feel the same way — that is, until you point out what you FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE see and help them experience it as you do. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Sure, things need to evolve and grow. The direction life needs to take, though — that’s the question now. This afternoon’s hit of reality will knock out some of the less-than-constructive op- tions on your mental list. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). If no one thinks it’s a problem, it’s not. But if you think it’s a problem, you’ll have to convince the others by demonstrating the signifi- cance of this potential harm before you can move forward with possible solutions. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). While some are threatened by success, you’ll be inspired by people out doing special things in the world — and even more so if they happen to be close friends of yours. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). While it feels good when a thoughtful person cares enough to show you that he or she is think- ing of you, it feels crummy if you haven’t reciprocated in this kindness. The compli- cations of friendship can be many. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). While exter- nal forces may be to blame for miserable circumstances, it does us no good to blame them, just like it doesn’t help us to credit ex- ternal circumstances for our wondrous luck. THURSDAY’S BIRTHDAY (Oct. 13). You’re not trying to impress; you just can’t help yourself. You’ll be a hero for doing what comes naturally. A fascinating turn of events puts you in a position to ask for more, earn more and get more in December. Family re- lationships bring joy and pride at the end of the year. Romance will be your main spring focus. Taurus and Virgo adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 4, 2, 22, 27 and 31.
