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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (Oct. 7, 2016)
FEATURES 6A Tomorrow’s horoscope You gonna need change? Dear Annie: I have gotten to the point that I no longer like to go out to eat, . Here’s why. You have a great meal in a nice restaurant. The service was friendly and excellent. When the check comes and I put my money down for the waitress, she says as she picks it up, “Do you need change?” This ticks me off to no end. I have gone through the trouble to try to educate the servers, in the hope of breaking them of the habit. So I explain to them that you never, ever put the customer on the defen- sive by insinuating that he is cheap for wanting change from the bills he put down. The servers I explain this to sometimes understand, but most of the time, they do not. They just think I am some senior citizen who complains a lot. I usually retaliate by leaving a small tip instead of the 20 to 25 percent that I would do otherwise. (I try to tip big because I know how little they make hourly.) Depending on how you look at it, I think I will leave a copy of my letter and your response along with the tip in the future. — Frustrated in Maine Dear Frustrated: It’s not the best etiquette on a server’s part to ask if you want change. But I think you’re looking at this wrong. Dear Annie By Annie Lane Creators Syndicate Inc. You’re assuming that servers are insinuating you’re cheap when they pose this question. I highly doubt that. Sure, there may be some servers out there who would use such tactics to try to shame a big tip out of customers. But most servers are more polite than that — and more intelligent. I ind it more likely they’re oblivious and just trying to save themselves a 30-second trip back to your table. In either scenario, a smile and a “yes, please” are the appropriate response. But if I hear a convincing case against this, I’ll print it here for you to clip and keep at the ready in your wallet. Dear Annie: I have a friend who is planning to have her wed- ding at a lake next year in a state where neither she nor her iance lives or has relatives. Her plan is to hold a very small (with about 10 people) private cer- emony, to be followed by a recep- tion with about 150 people. My question is: Is this proper? All the guests are coming from out of state. Shouldn’t all the guests be invited to the ceremony? I don’t feel it’s my place to tell the bride- to-be what I think, but I’m disap- pointed. I always look forward to the actual wedding ceremony more than the reception. Is that just me? — Confused Guest-to-Be Dear Confused: Yes, you’re right that typically, everyone would be invited to the ceremony. If any- thing, I’ve seen more weddings where the reverse is done — where more people are free to come to the ceremony than the reception because of budget constraints. ( For whatever reason, the bride and groom want to keep the cere- mony private. It might not be the traditional choice, but it’s their choice. Don’t take this as your being excluded. It’s still important to them that you all share in this day. It sounds as if they’re looking at the party not merely as a reception but as a celebration of their love in its own right. That’s special. Have fun. THE DAILY ASTORIAN • FRIDAY, OCTOBER 7, 2016 By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. ARIES (March 21-April 19). Control is a hugely successful strategy for dealing with the external world, though you’ll need a different strategy for the internal world, which can be about as easy to control as the ocean. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). A gift, or something you’re researching for another person, will suddenly seem piercingly rele- vant to your own life. Take it. Explore it. Use it. You didn’t stumble upon this by accident. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). The sad fact is that sometimes people do good things in order to feel OK about the bad things they’ve done or are about to do. It’s called “moral license,” and it’s something to watch out for today. CANCER (June 22-July 22). For a re- lationship to work, work is required. This weekend the effort will come in the form of self-denial, which is occasionally necessary in the development of healthy relationships and good character. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Assumptions will only cause problems. There is no reason to question the intent of the other person or to define the relationship in any different way. Evaluate each moment as it comes, taking things at face value. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). You are keen- ly aware of how the attention is distributed in a room and will move to create balance in this regard. It gives you no pleasure whatsoever to distract from the proper flow of focus. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). It will not ben- efit you to correct others, though they may be extremely wrong. Instead of making cor- rections, interrupt the pattern. If this can be FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE done in a fun way, you’ll find it. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). People’s behaviors are not always determined by personal motivation. Often, surrounding circumstances affect the decisions more. Changing the environment may be the eas- iest way to exert your influence. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Com- parison can lead to disaster, but how else are you going to understand what is possi- ble? If you must compare something in your life to get perspective, at least compare it with what’s rooted in reality and truth. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). Memo- ry Lane isn’t always nicely paved. You’ve a visceral reaction to pictures from your past. History evokes a different emotion in you than it might for others looking at the same slice of time. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). Make them guess what your strategy is. Part of being a worthy opponent is in being an in- teresting one. You don’t have to be the stron- gest in the game to be the best at playing it. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Your rules for a relationship may be different from the other person’s. It’s not something to talk out now; rather, it’s something to observe, as calmly as would a scientist. SATURDAY’S BIRTHDAY (Oct. 8). You’ll express yourself beautifully, and you’ll have plenty to express. What you share with oth- ers over the next 10 weeks will become part of your signature style. Later in 2017 you’ll be paid for the way you execute your plans. The needs of family will be a joy to fulfill in March. You’ll win a contest in June. Cap- ricorn and Cancer adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 9, 30, 41, 21 and 16.
