FEATURES
6A
Should mom confront her?
Dear Annie: My daughter-in-law is
telling people that she is cheating on my
son and that they are so far in debt they
should ile for bankruptcy. The person
she told came to me and told me this.
I have been trying to igure out how
to handle the situation. I feel as if I cannot
just sit and do nothing. I thought I would
go to my son and advise him to look into
their inances and say nothing about the
cheating. Now I am thinking about go-
ing to my daughter-in-law and saying to
her, “I know about the affairs and your
money troubles, and if you do not come
clean and tell my son, I am going to.”
As you can see, I am really upset
and do not know what my next move
should be. Please help me. — Uneasy
Mother-in-Law
Dear Uneasy: Consider the
source. Would your daughter-in-law
really have conided such a dark se-
cret in someone who was likely to go
to you with it? Recall those games of
telephone when you were younger.
“My dad likes to play tennis” could
easily become “The cat biked to the
dentist.” It’s very possible something
has been lost in translation here.
Let your son and his wife know
you’re there if they need to talk, but
don’t confront them with shoddy accu-
sations. It’s understandable that you’re
protective of your son, but at the same
time, there may be nothing to be pro-
Dear Annie
By
Annie
Lane
Creators
Syndicate
Inc.
tective of, and if you confronted them,
you’d risk losing your son and daugh-
ter-in-law in one fell swoop. Keep your
lips sealed. In real-life games of tele-
phone, everyone loses.
Dear Annie: My mother is in her
70s now and seems to be increasingly
judging people solely on their looks.
I love her dearly, and she has al-
ways been pretty bright, so I can’t fully
understand her obsession with how ev-
eryone looks. She delights in mention-
ing who is fat, who looks old, etc., and
it’s getting hard to be around her.
Perhaps not so surprisingly, she
herself has let herself go and is at such
an unhealthy weight, she can barely
walk, so the judging of others is most
likely coming from insecurities and the
fact that she really dislikes the way she
looks. But how do I tell her we don’t
need to hear this nonstop judging? —
Son of Debbie Downer
Dear Son: As the saying goes,
when you point a inger at someone,
there are three ingers pointing back at
you. You’re right that her insecurities
are probably the real motivation be-
hind her making these cruel remarks.
Rather than directly point out what
she’s doing or let yourself snap back in
anger, try building her up. The more
positive she feels about herself the less
negative she’ll feel about others.
It’s taxing to be around someone
who’s always in a sour mood, so be
sure to take care of yourself and spend
time socializing with plenty of other
people so your perspective isn’t too
warped. Negativity is contagious.
Dear Annie: This is in response to
“Stuck at a Crossroads,” the woman
who is upset that her long-term boy-
friend doesn’t want her to tag along
across the country when he goes to live
with his parents because his mom is sick.
You should have added: Do you
want to live with his parents and help
change diapers, clean up after bathroom
accidents and be on call night and day
for taking one to the emergency room?
It is not romantic, and that is why he
said no to your moving there. He can-
not be your boyfriend and be their son/
caretaker right now. You would never
see him. Caretakers seldom have time
off. He does not need you to take care
of or worry about right now.
THE DAILY ASTORIAN • THURSDAY, AUGUST 11, 2016
Tomorrow’s horoscope
By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc.
ARIES (March 21-April 19). You find some
small reason to celebrate, and suddenly you’ve
this irresistible party energy around you. Happy
people will be attracted to your high vibration.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). Your great work
will not be the result of a flash of inspiration.
It will be the culmination of dozens of experi-
ments then hundreds of exercises to hone and
tweak them. Try to be patient as you follow your
curiosity.
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Upon entering a
room, it’s natural to assume that everyone in-
side already knows one another, but of course
this isn’t usually the case. A small amount of
boldness is all it will take to make new friends.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). There was a
time you needed someone more than you do
now. It doesn’t mean that you were using this
person before (maybe a little). Anyway, your
efforts in the relationship will mean more now
because they are selfless.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Feelings are not
facts. Feelings grab your attention and your
mind immediately takes on the work of making
sense of it — filling in a story to explain why, a
theory, any theory, valid or not. Don’t overreact!
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Interests are, of
course, a natural basis for friendship, but how
are you to meet these new friends who share
your interests unless you take some initiative
and go to the meetup where they are hanging
out?
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). You like people
who are curious like you. This always leads
to riveting conversation. You also like resolved
people who don’t have to ask so many ques-
tions. Today brings a good balance between
the two types.
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Do not mistak-
FRANK AND ERNEST
BLONDIE
THATABABY
SALLY FORTH
PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN
B.C.
LOLA
DILBERT
SIX CHIX
BIZARRO
MUTTS
NON SEQUITUR
BABY BLUES
WIZARD OF ID
ZITS
ROSE IS ROSE
enly think that if you get this or that out of the
way, you’ll finally have peace. Your peace is not
being impeded by “this or that,” so much as the
machinations of your mind, which can also be
trained toward tranquility.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Questions
of authority arise. Who is to say? Who calls the
shots? Whose opinion matters? Who gets the
final word? The obvious answers are wrong.
Look deeper. Power can be tricky and secre-
tive.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). The very
ambition that causes you to want to be at a
higher peak might be preventing you from see-
ing your situation from the better vantage point.
The only way is to shake off your desire, fear
and ego. Be the moment.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). When you
think of the other person as an adversary, the
gap between your positions seems ever so
wide. But is this person really the enemy? With
all you have in common, you could be fighting
for a shared goal.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Travels and ad-
ventures are on your mind, though you wonder
if all the fun is in the fantasy of this. There are
pains and inconveniences involved in making
this real. Is it worth it? Only you can answer
that.
FRIDAY’S BIRTHDAY (Aug. 12). Life is cu-
mulative. What you now consider to be some
of your most valuable experiences were at one
time stories you didn’t want to tell. Because of
your open mind and embracing heart, many re-
splendent happenings unfold before the year is
over. Take your impressive earnings and invest
them in the February project. Pisces and Libra
adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 6, 2, 1, 14
and 9.