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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (Dec. 21, 2015)
THE DAILY ASTORIAN • MONDAY, DECEMBER 21, 2015 FEATURES Is it OK to give man a ride? Dear Annie: My husband and I live in the house where I was raised. I feel fortunate that most of my neighbors are people I grew up with. One neighbor is a very good friend. We’ve known each other since childhood. She is in bad shape physically and financially, and does not drive. The grandkids she raised still live with her. Neither of them has a car. The 21-year-old grandson walks three miles to and from work every day, rain or shine. On some days, I drop my grandson off at school, which is within a half mile of where my neighbor’s son works. I offered to give the young man a ride on those days when I’m going in that direction anyway. My husband feels this is wrong. He says no one would approve if he offered to give the 18-year-old granddaughter a ride. Annie, this young man is the same age as my grandkids (who I wish had the oomph to walk anywhere). I don’t know why it’s any different than when I take his grandmother shopping or to the bank. My husband and I have been married for Annie’s Mailbox Creators Syndicate Inc. Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar 30 years and have no trust is- sues. He says it has nothing to do with trust. It’s just not right. I’m confused. What do you say? — M. Dear M.: We say, give the kid a ride. We understand your husband’s perspective and agree that there is a double standard here. When Grandpa gives a young woman a ride, there is a presumption that he might be sexually interested in her and could take advan- tage. But the same presump- tion doesn’t hold for Grandma, probably because society con- siders postmenopausal women to be asexual beings and more likely, that the young man can defend himself. However, your husband is talking in generalities, and your issue is very specific. You are not interested in this young man other than to help him get to work. If your husband is worried about what the neigh- bors will think, he can come along for the ride. It’s a shame that we’ve become so suspi- cious of one another that we cannot do a good deed without raising such fears. Dear Annie: Is it OK to give money as a wedding gift to a couple in their early 20s? We aren’t concerned that they won’t remember our gift. We just think that money provides greater flexibility. Isn’t cash what most young couples need? — Wondering in New York Dear Wondering: It is al- ways OK to give money as a wedding gift, and many cou- ples appreciate it more than other things. The drawbacks are that the couple will know exactly how much you spent on their gift and that some people believe a monetary gift is gauche. Money doesn’t hold the same sentiment or personal touch as something that is cho- sen specifically for the cou- ple, but according to our mail, most couples don’t mind that one bit. 5A Tomorrow’s horoscope By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. ARIES (March 21-April 19). It’s easy for you to admit when you’re wrong. What’s hard, however, is being right and simultaneously too classy and/or com- passionate to gloat about it. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). You’re in the mood to take a financial risk. The others will protest this investment. May- be they want to be able to say, “I told you so” if it fails. Don’t let that stop you. Act on your hunch. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). There’s a time for thinking, wondering, obsess- ing — this isn’t it. It’s know-and-go time. (Also, if you don’t know, don’t go.) The plan is simple, and if you refuse to com- plicate it, you’ll win. CANCER (June 22-July 22). You get to decide who you are. Don’t let your cir- cumstances impose an idea that you’re not comfortable with. Take control of the scene, even if it means you have to bring your own scenery. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). When you don’t know the answer, silence will help you. It takes confidence and wisdom to be quiet, but the truth is that you don’t owe anyone an explanation or a solution. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Give your loved one a responsibility and let that person know that you believe whole- heartedly that he or she can deliver on it. This will help you and simultaneously lift up your loved one. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Promises are best made in a somber mood or not at all. Happiness tends to override rea- son, giving way to bloated promises that later you won’t want to keep. FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Even the best of relationships benefit from occa- sional absences. You’ll give space and time and breathing room what you’ll get back is affection, fondness and appreci- ation. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). You have the best intentions and a clever plan to match. The moment may bring a different reality than expected. There’s brilliance in the clash between what you expect and what you get. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). What- ever the outcome of today’s interaction, there’s something good in it. Maybe that good won’t be so obvious, but it really is there. Mentally dig around until you find it. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). The most brilliant ideas will come to you while you’re driving, showering, walking, doing dishes or participating in a similar- ly (relatively) mindless task. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). You prob- ably won’t be able to keep yourself from hearing untrue rumors, but at least you won’t spread them. Ignore negativity and something worthwhile will drop in to earn the best of your attention. TUESDAY’S BIRTHDAY (Dec. 22). In some part of your life you’ve been in a position to make due. That’s about to change with a stroke of luck and a pro-ac- tive mindset. Next month brings a symbol of the new you that you can hold. Febru- ary opens a professional chapter, starting with a challenge. Your family will expand in June. Virgo and Taurus adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 13, 7, 19, 2 and 28.
