FEATURES
6A
Tomorrow’s horoscope
Getting rid of pesky friend
Dear Annie: My husband and
I are friends with another couple
in our neighborhood. The majority
of the time, we get along well. We
have even traveled together.
The problem is, “Susie” is
very loud and an extremely poor
conversationalist. She dominates
the get-togethers by talking about
nonsense, and she constantly re-
peats herself. She interrupts ev-
eryone’s conversations with, “Oh,
I’ve done that,” and off she goes
about herself. Susie’s husband
doesn’t seem bothered by this, but
it drives me nuts. My husband also
doesn’t like it.
We have out-of-town family vis-
iting soon and these neighbors have
invited themselves over. How do I
tell them they aren’t welcome be-
cause we don’t want them to have
to tolerate Susie’s bad behavior?
I see my family infrequently and
we don’t want to be uncomfortable
with the relatives in our own home.
— Frustrated Friendship
Dear Frustrated: There is
nothing wrong with telling Susie
and her husband that you want to
spend some private time with your
family. Should they drop by unin-
vited, you can introduce them and
let them say hello, but then nicely
usher them out, telling Susie that
mother for her failure to protect
him. When one parent is an ac-
tive abuser and the other one fails
to protect, the children are left in
Creators
painful circumstances. They often
Syndicate Inc.
excuse the “passive” parent and
project them as another victim of
Kathy Mitchell
the abuser because they cannot
and
bear to see the truth. Sis, too, may
Marcy Sugar
be directing her anger at John in-
stead of her mother.
you will visit with them when
Whenever abuse is present,
you are less occupied with family it creates a toxic situation for the
members. But please don’t assume family. I hope that Sis will seek
WKDW \RXU UHODWLYHV ZLOO ¿QG 6XVLH therapy because she was also a
as annoying as you do. For a brief victim. It can help her feel empa-
visit, she could be perfectly tolera- thy for herself as well as John, and
ble. The trick is to keep it extreme- lessen her anger. It is important for
ly short.
Sis to know she can accept Mom’s
Dear Annie: I was saddened failure to provide a safe home for
and upset by the letter from “An- her children and still continue to
gry Sis,” whose brother “John” love and be loved by Mom. I sin-
stopped speaking to his 83-year- cerely pray that she may be the
old mother after she asked him to catalyst to help this family heal
testify against his abusive stepfa- while Mom is still alive. — S.
ther. “Sis” asked whether she had
Dear S.: Many readers weighed
to invite John to Mom’s funeral in on this letter, saying that Sis did
when she died. Her letter showed not quite comprehend the level of
a lack of empathy and understand- John’s own trauma and possible
ing for victims of childhood sexual anger after having been abused as a
abuse.
child, especially when Mom went
Mom brought the pedophile to court to protect his half-broth-
stepfather into the family. John’s er, but didn’t do the same for him.
attitude may stem from the an- We, too, hope she can help the
ger he rightfully feels toward his family heal.
Annie’s
Mailbox
THE DAILY ASTORIAN • MONDAY, OCTOBER 5, 2015
By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc.
ARIES (March 21-April 19). Stop trying to
find a proven model on which to base your
project. You’re too unique. The existing mod-
els won’t do you justice. This is your chance
to be inventive.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). You learn
when you win; you learn even more when
you lose. Therefore, you’re not even sure
what you should hope for today. You can’t
go wrong just hoping for the best.
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). That friend
who facilitates rational, methodical, solu-
tion-focused talk is a gem. Call on this per-
son as you try to work out the details of a
knotty problem. You’ll be better together.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). The con-
fident person works to become stronger,
while the under-confident person accepts
the current level and doubts that it can be
maintained over time. If you’re not feeling
confident, pretend. Pretending will make it so.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Everyone in your
group is doing the same thing, but not ev-
eryone can do well as long as this is the
case. Diversify. Suddenly the ones who
used to be your competition will become
supporters.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Let go, and
it all gets done. Maybe it doesn’t come to-
gether exactly the way you wanted it to, but
that might be a good thing. At some point,
you have to start developing and trusting
the strength of your group. Why not today?
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). The cosmic
opportunities will include a chance at more
profitable dealings. You have reasons, other
than financial, for doing business. Lead with
these reasons and your high integrity, and
you can’t lose.
FRANK AND ERNEST
BLONDIE
THATABABY
SALLY FORTH
STONE SOUP
B.C.
LOLA
DILBERT
SIX CHIX
BIZARRO
MUTTS
NON SEQUITUR
BABY BLUES
WIZARD OF ID
ZITS
ROSE IS ROSE
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). When the
others in your group can’t come to a collec-
tive decision, consider whether it’s time to
branch out alone. Decisive and appropriate
action completed in a timely manner is what
it will take to move forward.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Trying
to do everything at once will only squander
your energy. You have plenty now. If you
place it well, it will build momentum. Place
it poorly, and you won’t believe how quickly
it can drain.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). It would
be nice to get some formal training for that
interest of yours, if only for the feeling of ac-
complishment that comes with checking off
all the items you learned along the way and
receiving a certificate.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). Your friends
only understand what you’ve told them about
yourself through your words and actions. You
might consider presenting yourself differently
in order to show a new side.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Good rela-
tionships can’t be forced or manufactured.
They are the product of exchanges of ener-
gy that make sense for each person. Reci-
procity is different for everyone.
TUESDAY’S BIRTHDAY (Oct. 6). Am-
bition is highlighted. By your next birthday,
you’ll be able to say, “I accomplished what
few could achieve.” Your experience com-
bined with another person’s resources will
be a winning combination over the next six
weeks. The end of 2015 focuses on healing
a relationship. An investment invigorates
your spring. Virgo and Aries people adore
you. Your lucky numbers are: 6, 17, 48, 19
and 33.